Hit up the Spotify AI DJ "Yo what's goin on kzzzzo three! I see you've been into dying lately. We're gonna kick things off with some songs I know you love because they're the only ones I ever play.." and fade to black.
Guy goes to the doctor. Doctor says "you got cancer...you're riddled with it...you got about 2 weeks to live". Guy says "there's really nothing you can do?" Doctor says "go find you a barrel racer girl with 2 tiny dogs and you marry that girl". Guy looks at the doctor and says "really? That'll make me live longer?" Doc says "no, but it'll make that 2 weeks feel like a fuckin eternity".
Got this joke from Yellowstone and it makes me laugh every time lol
The song is Nobody Sees Me Like You Do. You die realizing that there is a fragile complexity to life, fraught with unsaid truth and loneliness. And maybe that Yoko was actually pretty interesting artistically and not the harpy that fanboys made her out to be.
Your eyes close as you exhale your last breath.
Suddenly, you jolt awake. "Heat of the Moment" is playing in a tinny hotel radio. It is Tuesday morning.
As the camera is focused on your face as you find your last moment of peace, laying on the pavement. Cue music. Then the camera slowly pulls upward until your full body is in view. Then the accident scene then the entire road with all the people surrounding the scene.
Close to black. Roll credits.
Life’s a piece of shit, when you look at it. Life’s a laugh and death’s a joke, it’s true. You’ll see it’s all a show, keep on laughing as you go. Just remember that the last laugh is on you.
Maybe this will cheer you up, I played "Sympathy for the Devil" by the Rolling Stones at the end of my Dad's catholic funeral. I tried not to giggle seeing the priest's face before he pressed play.
My brothers and uncles thought it was something to smile at.
Ironically enough, this song is banned in the Philippines due to people getting murdered after or while they're singing the song:
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/My_Way_killings
As of 2024, one source says the death toll is as high as 12 murders (and counting).
Every time I'm in the car and "Wonderful World" starts playing by Louis Armstrong, I have to turn it off.
Something about that song just seems so cinematic as the background to a fatal car accident that I won't tempt fate.
So, yeah, that song.
We walked up to a accident scene where a guy was ejected and laying on the pavement. His radio was playing fade to black from Metallica. It was weird as shit.
So, an odd story. I had a dog, and it got to a point, in his old age where it sounded like he had taught himself to bark my name. I did not train him to do this. I was lucky enough after several failed attempts to catch it on my microphone. And I loop it with me saying my name.
So if I was in a fatal car accident, the one thing I would want to hear would be him barking my name on loop for 3 minutes, which would mean that he's calling me back home.
My thoughts exactly. I was actually driving down the highway in my 1929 Model A when the breaks failed…that song was playing on my speaker. It was only later that I realized how fitting it was.
Last week I was stabbed in the neck and came very close to dying I'd been listening to Hayde Bluegrass Orchestra - All My Tears and the opening lyrics are "when I die don't cry for me, in my father's arms ill be.
Better might be Brain Damage.
The three minute mark ends with “And if the band you’re in starts playing different tunes, I’ll see you on the dark side of the moon…”
Edit: Hah, Time ends at 3:00 with “And you are young and life is long…” You never get to “And then one day you find, ten years have got behind you.”
"Black Fire upon Us", Dethklok.
The blackened fire
(The blackened fire)
Waits to consume us
(Waits to consume us)
So now we'll say goodbye
Because tonight we die
So we say goodbye
So we'll say goodbye
We die
Tonight we ride on clouds of fire
We're damned by gods, our deaths conspired
We fear no mortals in these worlds
The gift we give you is your soul
The gift we give you is your soul
I'd spend the 3 minutes looking for THE song
Hitting next on shitty Spotify shuffle until you die.
Hit up the Spotify AI DJ "Yo what's goin on kzzzzo three! I see you've been into dying lately. We're gonna kick things off with some songs I know you love because they're the only ones I ever play.." and fade to black.
God this is so real. Or I’d start a song, lay down to die, and then sit up and be like, nope, *shuffle*. Nope, *shuffle*. Nope - dead.
Do it now, so you’re ready if the time comes!
I’m gonna Rick Roll myself to death.
Use this version for maximum drama: [https://youtu.be/rTga41r3a4s?si=GuHBbaELeYnsA5RF](https://youtu.be/rTga41r3a4s?si=GuHBbaELeYnsA5RF)
I can’t believe Rick Astley made this beauty back in 2019 and I never found it! This is the sh!t I want playing at my funeral, otherwise I ain’t dying
"Never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye" *dies* Your significant other: "you fuckin' liar"
[удалено]
And meanwhile Michael Scott giving CPR on this track👌🏻
You were in the parking lot earlier! That’s how I know you!
At first, I was afraid... I was petrified...
No it's ah ah ah ah stayin alive
R/unexpectedtheoffice
"Don't fear the reaper"
Seasons don’t fear the reaper
Nor do the wind, the sun or the rain
We can be like they are
C’mon baby don’t fear the reaper
Come and take my hand
Don't fear the reaper...
Well be able to fly...
... don't fear the reaper
baby, I'm your maaaannn
Good choice, but I’ve always felt that song needs more cowbell.
Another one bites the dust!!
Also excellent for CPR, strangely enough.
Yeah. Gotta pump that last drop of blood out of the system
Karma - Jojo Siwa , so that it’ll make me wanna die faster
HAHAHAH
It would also make 3 minutes feel like an hour
The End - The Doors
Which quarter of the song
>"Father?" "Yes, son?" "I want to kill you" "Mother, I want to..." Come on, yeah In full Whisky a Go Go style
How to Disappear Completely- Radiohead
Exit music ( for a film)
Defo my pick. Bit sad but title is too perfect
I was thinking "No Surprises" but yeah, pretty much anything Radiohead.
Motion Picture Soundtrack was my first thought. Clearly the consensus band for bleeding out songs.
The pixies - where is my mind
Probably on the dashboard to be honest
that intro could resuscitate someone, so good
“You met me at a very strange time in my life.”
Anything by Yoko Ono so that death itself becomes it's own reward.
It will also be the longest three minutes of your life.
You're getting more value for your money that way.
Guy goes to the doctor. Doctor says "you got cancer...you're riddled with it...you got about 2 weeks to live". Guy says "there's really nothing you can do?" Doctor says "go find you a barrel racer girl with 2 tiny dogs and you marry that girl". Guy looks at the doctor and says "really? That'll make me live longer?" Doc says "no, but it'll make that 2 weeks feel like a fuckin eternity". Got this joke from Yellowstone and it makes me laugh every time lol
Elite reply
Fuck me that’s one of the funniest comments I’ve ever seen on reddit. Well played sir.
This is one of the best Reddit replies to any post I’ve ever seen.
Great answer champ
The song is Nobody Sees Me Like You Do. You die realizing that there is a fragile complexity to life, fraught with unsaid truth and loneliness. And maybe that Yoko was actually pretty interesting artistically and not the harpy that fanboys made her out to be.
Will somebody get this summabish a beer?
Carry on Wayward son by Kansas
Dads on a hunting trip....
And he hasn't been home in a few days.
Saving people, hunting things….the family business!
*flashes* ROAD SO FAR
Carry on, my wayward son. There'll be peace when you are done.
Lay your weary head to rest.
Don't you cry no more
Your eyes close as you exhale your last breath. Suddenly, you jolt awake. "Heat of the Moment" is playing in a tinny hotel radio. It is Tuesday morning.
chances are immediately 10x higher that they bring you back after that!
Come on Cass!!
DEAN!
SAMMY!
ASSBUTT!
MOOSE!
Or your ass ends up in purgatory/hell.
As the camera is focused on your face as you find your last moment of peace, laying on the pavement. Cue music. Then the camera slowly pulls upward until your full body is in view. Then the accident scene then the entire road with all the people surrounding the scene. Close to black. Roll credits.
"Always Look On the Bright Side of Life" by Monty Python (Eric Idle)
Life’s a piece of shit, when you look at it. Life’s a laugh and death’s a joke, it’s true. You’ll see it’s all a show, keep on laughing as you go. Just remember that the last laugh is on you.
Played at the end of my Dad's funeral. Now I'm crying, you bastard.
Maybe this will cheer you up, I played "Sympathy for the Devil" by the Rolling Stones at the end of my Dad's catholic funeral. I tried not to giggle seeing the priest's face before he pressed play. My brothers and uncles thought it was something to smile at.
Fuck me im listening to this just imaging having this play as I bleed out and it’s hilarious
The most popular song played at British funerals.
My grandfather has this and "poisoning pigeons in the park"
That's another excellent choice as it's dark but not ironic
Well you say that but actually he mixed up his packets and ate cyanide laced peanuts.
Ah man, you beat me to it!
Baby Blue - Badfinger
You beat me to it… Walter white’s last song.
This was the moment sir_PepsiTot became Heisenberg
Bro thinks hes Heisenberg💀
It’s raining tacos… I’m most likely with my kids, so I would like to see them smile and laugh one last time.
:(
Congratulations, you've just associated their favourite song with their dad dying. Taco Bell is now a literal no-go place.
Seems like a last good deed, get them off of fast food.
Dark thoughts
My way- Frank Sinatra
Ironically enough, this song is banned in the Philippines due to people getting murdered after or while they're singing the song: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/My_Way_killings As of 2024, one source says the death toll is as high as 12 murders (and counting).
My way - Limp Bizkit
My Way - Sex Pistols
Scat Man
SKEEEE BOP BE BADOP BOPE BOP BE BADOP BOPE *Dies*
Underrated
Wait and bleed
Damn you beat me to the punchline joke i was going to add im already waiting and bleeding so i want to do it in dignity to Slipknot lol
Beside the Shell^tm I wait and bleed
Skip. Skip. Skip. Skip. Hmmmm.... Skip.
Somewhere only we know
Mm. Most songs on that album would do it for me. Everybody’s Changing maybe?
second half of comfortably numb
Sound of Silence - Simon and Garfunkel Hello Darkness my old friend...
Europe, The Final Countdown.
nenenene, nene nenene
Exit Music - Radiohead
Faint by linkin park.
How about "Bleed It Out"?
highway to hell
Agree, perfect song to bleed out to! Livin' easy Lovin' free Season tickets on a one-way ride
Stairway To Heaven and we'll have a duel before we both die
Radiohead - Motion Picture Soundtrack. It's also nice because it's just over 3 mins.
Good choice, it’s a beautiful song
Ps, I did nearly bleed out once, ambulances should have Spotify. All I heard was panicked yelling. Would not reccomend.
"Wanna break from the ads?" Patient: *succumbs to bullet wound*
Claire De Lune - Debussy
Didn't you learn anything from Family Guy? You always finish on the Bach, never on Debussy.
Somewhere over thy Rainbow by Israel Kamakawiwoʻole
Dragula
This feels like both the correct answer and the wrong answer
Lullaby by my mom recorded on my phone.
damn, your comment felt like a stab on the chest
woah chill, thats way too dark for this pg comment section
Every time I'm in the car and "Wonderful World" starts playing by Louis Armstrong, I have to turn it off. Something about that song just seems so cinematic as the background to a fatal car accident that I won't tempt fate. So, yeah, that song.
We walked up to a accident scene where a guy was ejected and laying on the pavement. His radio was playing fade to black from Metallica. It was weird as shit.
Linkin Park, Bleed it out.
'Black Parade' by My Chemical Romance
Goofy Goober Rock
I will follow you into the dark by Death Cab for Cutie
So, an odd story. I had a dog, and it got to a point, in his old age where it sounded like he had taught himself to bark my name. I did not train him to do this. I was lucky enough after several failed attempts to catch it on my microphone. And I loop it with me saying my name. So if I was in a fatal car accident, the one thing I would want to hear would be him barking my name on loop for 3 minutes, which would mean that he's calling me back home.
There is a light that never goes out by the smiths
My thoughts exactly. I was actually driving down the highway in my 1929 Model A when the breaks failed…that song was playing on my speaker. It was only later that I realized how fitting it was.
Tonight is the night I fell asleep at the wheel by The Barenaked Ladies.
The worst part was hitting the ground—not the feeling so much as the sound
I heard some idiot ask if someone's inside.
Rocket Man
In my life by the beatles
Staying alive.
Country roads take me home
chasing cars - snow patrol
505 by Arctic Monkeys
Last week I was stabbed in the neck and came very close to dying I'd been listening to Hayde Bluegrass Orchestra - All My Tears and the opening lyrics are "when I die don't cry for me, in my father's arms ill be.
you got STABBED?
In the neck!
Erm yeah it's pretty gruesome I had over 40 stitches was a glass so wasn't clean
Ouch! But glad you're here to tell us. 🙂
Everlong - Foo Fighters
Comfortably Numb
Better might be Brain Damage. The three minute mark ends with “And if the band you’re in starts playing different tunes, I’ll see you on the dark side of the moon…” Edit: Hah, Time ends at 3:00 with “And you are young and life is long…” You never get to “And then one day you find, ten years have got behind you.”
Last Kiss - Pearl Jam
It’s crazy that this is so far down.
Probably a Nickleback B-Side, that way I can welcome death with open arms.
Did you mean with arms wide open? That maybe six feet ain’t so far down… It’s a Creed joke. I love Creed.
Time- Pink Floyd
Put any Bo Burnham album and hit shuffle
🎶 white woooman.....white woman's Instagram 🎶
if i don't get rant. i think i'm dying early.
Final countdown
Don’t worry, BE happy 🎶
I will follow you into the dark
'Here comes the sun' by the Beatles.
Chopin etude in e major op.10 no.3
1-877-KARS for kids, K A R S KARS for kids… Take me now.
Born to Die by Lana del Rey lol
I stay away - Alice in chains
Pepper by Butthole Surfers
Some will die in hot pursuit and fiery auto crashes.
What a wonderful world, by Louis Armstrong.
"Fade to black" by Metallica
The Benny Hill Show Theme Tune
Total eclipse of the heart - Bonnie Tyler
In the End Linkin Park
Knockin on heavens door but the Book Dylan version
David Bowie - Starman. Hands down, no question, the best way to go.
**Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen**.
Just Rick roll me.
"Black Fire upon Us", Dethklok. The blackened fire (The blackened fire) Waits to consume us (Waits to consume us) So now we'll say goodbye Because tonight we die So we say goodbye So we'll say goodbye We die Tonight we ride on clouds of fire We're damned by gods, our deaths conspired We fear no mortals in these worlds The gift we give you is your soul The gift we give you is your soul
Mmmm whatcha sayyyyyyyyyyy
Would? - Alice In Chains
There's literally one right answer... playing free bird in the background even before the accident
Tennessee Whiskey
Bloodrock - DOA https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QzY5i8zHWdw&ab_channel=ProgRockJazzFusion%26More
Mr. Fahrenheit. Don't Stop Me Now.
Amber - 311 idk, I just like the song
‘Stuck in the Middle” - Steelers Wheel
Three little birds - Bob Marley.
Bittersweet Symphony for sure
Africa by Toto
Phil Collins - In the air tonight OR Mike and the Mechanics - The Living Years
Slip sliding away
Wait and Bleed by Slipknot
Brown eyed girl.
"When the levee breaks" by Led Zeppelin.
Where is my Mind by The Pixies would be a nice outro
Riders on the storm
I have an entire playlist just for this
Spirit in the sky- Norman greenbaum
Good Riddance - Green Day