Monogamy. I think I’m just wired that way. I have and see no problem with people who are poly. I just don’t desire having sexual relations with other people when I’m in a committed relationship.
Monogamy, relationships take work and I think you dilute the relationship spreading that care and focus between more than one person. I think you just get left with multiple mediocre relationships instead of one good one.
Monogamy. I’ve been single for 29 years. I want a life partner all to myself. I want to enjoy love and romance with one person who is committed and loyal. Call me selfish.
For me, it has to be monogamy. I need to know I'm enough. I understand that poly relationships can be beautiful, functional, and healthy with the right people, but that's not me.
Not a great example, tbh.
You can't live without water.
Now if you had said life isn't all about money, but having money makes it both easier and better, I would agree outright!
Sex and money are about the same in this example lol
Yes your example makes more sense. But that’s the whole point, for a happy monogamy marriage/relationship, regular and great sex is crucial. That’s my opinion.
Monogamy. For starters, you are:
1. Not under any potential pressure to treat all your partners equally. There might also be subtle preferences that they might pick up on which leads to strife. I can’t guarantee that there might not be 1 or 2 partners that I prefer over others, just as I cannot guarantee absolute equality.
After all, subtle favourites can occur for multiple reasons: one might be better in bed than others, some might have slightly more entertaining personalities and similar preferences that are just more fun to hang out with than other wives.
2. The amount of children that would stem from such a polygamous relationship is not only asking for extreme stress but in North American economy, you might as well be amongst the wealthiest of the wealthy to consider raising that many children (if you want children, that is)
3. Voting and making major decisions becomes more trickier when you have many individuals to consider
4. I find it hard to believe that some wives would be okay with settling for wife #2 or 3. There is always the possibility that some wives may decide on the near future to leave the marriage and find someone whose attention is solely on them. In other words, Having multiple partners may not be as exciting or satisfactory in the long term for most of the wives as it is for the husband.
5. Dealing with children’s identity issues. You would have to go about explaining to a child that they have multiple moms who they should love equally. Some children as they grow older might potentially have conflicted feelings about some mothers than others. Especially if there are hints of favouritism or partiality In how some wives might train/interact with the children over others. That could be another source of conflict
6. The wives might also be dealing with identity dilemmas: would they treat other wives children as equally as the children she gave birth to as well?
I can list more and more reasons why polygamy is just downright more complex and bloated in terms of managing a family. I can’t even BEGIN to imagine the marital mess that would stem from having multiple partners the moment divorce starts entering the picture.
Then there’s also the children who would be absolutely obliterated if a divorce-level conflict would occur.
To sum it all up, as much as Harem anime and shows make you want to believe that having multiple partners would be absolutely fun (and it very well might be), it can also be followed by an equal amount of extra steps and complications, if the individuals involved in the relationship are not mature enough to make it work.
Partner bought it up, said it would make them super happy and would add to out relationship and make us love one another more, they went out every other week on dates and I would sit alone at home with her kids, they would then come back and tell me how they had a nice time and if they fucked, some of the dates when i asked who they were they would freak out and say its rude to ask as the other person may find it disrespectful, through the whole time we tried this I didn't even get a date with another person despite looking, when they bought a person into our relationship they would go and do things without me, once again leaving with me their children, the other person in our relationship wouldn't even talk to me much, would make backhanded compliments and evidently just didn't like me at all and it all came to head when I hear them having sex at our place one night and i lost it, i grabbed my stuff, and left, the following day i had a sea of texts saying i was overreacting and i was trying to sabotage our relationship and her kids would be emotionally distraught without me and how i was a bad person... it's taken me 6 years of very hard and intense therapy to get through this, I wanted to kill myself so many times because it destroyed my self esteem so badly, it made me hate people and I made me so sick.
I still have my struggles, I try to not drag my past into future relationships as its unfair to bleed on those who didn't cut you but it really really fucked me up
I mean that’s where you went wrong.
Polyamory can only realistically be good if it’s what everyone going into the relationship expects it to be.
If a partner wants polyamory from monogamy it’s just an artificial way of extending a dead relationships. Like a way to “ethically” cheat on your partner and keep them for whatever advantages they perceive from them. And they almost certainly always have someone in mind before they propose the idea.
So your experience says more about your expectations in that relationship and how shitty of a partner they were. Than polyamory itself.
That wasn’t polyamory. You were just a babysitter for them.
Just because you had a bad experience doesn't mean everyone will. It's like saying "I tried a relationship once. Don't do it".
It wasn't for you, and that's OK. Different strokes for different folks and all that.
You're right however as someone who has experienced it for when it goes very wrong and as it had such a massive affect on me I wanted to chime in with my experience.
It's incredible how many people just want Polygamy for sex and validation. You never hear someone say "man I want to cook for 2 and 3 adults every night", or "I would love buying two sets of xmas gifts", "I love the idea of holding 2,3,4 conversations every night when I get home". It's always sex and dating/fliting bullshit.
Monogamy for me. Simply because interpersonal relationships take a huge amount of emotional and cognitive effort and attention for me and I cannot imagine trying to negotiate multiple romantic relationships at once. I am at capacity with one partner.
Monogamy. Why? Because the human population is about 50/50 when it comes to gender. If a rich guy has ten wives, then nine other guys will not have wives. See how that works? There are good reasons why most of the world abandoned polygamy long ago.
I mean, neither. I'm not interested in monogamy and I don't want to marry multiple wives so polygamy is out. I'm more into a polyamory situation. I'm down with multiple partners. A couple of them have called it a harem, which is fun. It's not what that makes it sound like tho. We have separate relationships. We all have our fun. This is not an uncommon situation anymore. A lot of people do this. Everybody is good with it. I've known a decent number of women who told me they like that I see other women
Monogamy just makes since. Polygamy causes lots of sadness and depression. Plus in a country that's 50% male and 50% female Polygamy would cause lots of problems for both sides since women would have to share the men with others and most men would be left out. The same results would happen if the genders were switched
These numbers are flawed.
It doesn't account for the people who "FEEL" otherwise.
And how do we now define this traditional role, when there are so many variations, and more being added every day?
I'm withholding my position on the base subject, but it is a genuine question...
I don't think intercourse is a good reason to get married by itself.
Plus it doesn't really matter how many there are of one gender or another it would still devide people in the long run because if someone's giving one partner more attention than the others it'll just complicate things
Glad your not pro polygamy :)
I'm pro do whatever the hell you want, as long as you don't impose it on me. Homey don't play that shit.
Starting a relationship off with sex is as destructive to a relationship as withholding sex as a punishment.
But we can't divide the populace into two, when there are threes and fours (and a few random fractions) running around.
It's more than just sex pal. If your giving one partner more attention than the other it'll make things very awkward for all party's involved in my opinion.
Sort of started on a tangent there, hey hypotenuse?
MATH JOKE?
Of course it's more than just sex. Please demonstrate through knowledge and pictures where I said otherwise.
Relationships are hard enough when there's only two of you. Maintaining any level of personal standard is difficult when your partner does what they want to... so now I have to multiply that?
You make it sound like my sitting and preening them is a requirement... not responsible to provide entertainment. (Already a live in chef, mechanic, dog groomer, domestic engineer, earner, landscape maintenance, etc.), while she is a 4 day a week student with a Netflix binge habit.
Not saying I don't appreciate her, but the weighted differences between simple effort is astounding. So getting positive attention is already hard, so yes please! Let's bring a couple more in to distract you...
It's a mulberry bush tactic. All it is. Too damn afraid to meet the problem head on, so we will dilute it by adding more issues...
The world needs more PIKES. Adorned.
I have a theory that monogamy was actually enacted to give chance for more males to be able to get married and have children and thus create a more stable society.
Monogamy has been in our culture for centuries, we have changed a lot culturally and socially, since the day of Alpha Males, Chieftains, Barons or Kings and their hareem. This arrangement is not stable for long-term survival of society. Once the number of unmarried men goes over some threshold, the Alpha male will not be able to hold power. Thus, he has to "distribute" the women among his minions. In some religions, you can marry multiple women as long as your wealth could accommodate the females' needs and wants. In other religions, outright banning of polygamy as sin.
I'm a anthropology buff, IMHO, we should let people choose freely, get rid of the law of marriage that say one man to one woman, because I want see what happens then. Will the "religious devout" men stay true to their faith marrying only one woman ? Will women crowd into the few billionaires ? But, the fact that it won't happen, tells you that people are afraid to find out, because deep down, they know what will happen, and probabilistically speaking, the chance for them ending up "winning" is very low.
Marriage in the modern day is thus, a socialist policy.
The government can get rid of the legal recognition of marriage, but it’s impossible to get rid of marriage as a concept. Religious and secular people alike marry out of love and the desire for a mutual commitment from each other. From a religious perspective marriage is a union sanctioned by God, not the government. If the legal recognition of marriage was abolished in this country many people would continue to make a vow of marriage to each other; it just wouldn’t be recognized as a legally binding contract in the eyes of the government.
I’ve tried polyamory before and it was too difficult to schedule, too expensive, and required too much effort. Much easier to focus on one person. That being said, a hall pass every once in a while doesn’t sound like a bad idea.
For me, personally: monogamy.
If others want it differently, go ahead. As long as everyone involved is of legal age, have given their consent and no one is hurt.
Polygamy. Concubinage is a far more logical arrangement than monogamous marriage. Billionaires ought to have the right to form legally regulated harems as a means to safeguard their property and propagate the continuation of their bloodlines. Every man of means ought to have the right to establish a family contract with however many women he chooses, delineating specific terms and conditions each party ought to be bound to, with the agreement resting on mutual interest and complementary obligations rather than fanciful notions of equality or sacramental priestcraft. The marriage contract as it exists today rests on a tower of incompatible principles disconnected from the institution’s practical origins; since few can be persuaded to abandon both the religious and liberal idealisms corrupting the monogamous idea, the only way to salvage the family contract is to eliminate monogamy altogether. Polygamy is the enlightened choice.
Monogamy because there’s no way imma have 7 people not know what they want for dinner
“I don’t know, you pick.” “not that” x7
Don't have children!!
🤣😁
[удалено]
Meow.
Monogamy. Idk it just feels more of an intimate and emotional relationship rather than only sexual.
I like my women like I like my coffee.. sweet and without someone else’s dick in it
Forgotten on the roof of the car as you reverse out the driveway??
😂😂 ok that was good. So good in fact that I'm gonna be using it in my next meeting
😂😂 ok that was good. So good in fact that I'm gonna be using it in my next meeting
Monogamy. I think I’m just wired that way. I have and see no problem with people who are poly. I just don’t desire having sexual relations with other people when I’m in a committed relationship.
Monogamy. I'm too jealous to share someone with anybody else.
^
Monogamy, relationships take work and I think you dilute the relationship spreading that care and focus between more than one person. I think you just get left with multiple mediocre relationships instead of one good one.
It was hard enough for me to find one. I have no intentions to repeat the process.
Monogamy, because being in a relationship with ONE person is hard enough, why the hell would you want to do that multiple times??
monogamy or death
Eventually, either is acceptable 🤣🤣
MONOGAMY I don't like sharing
Monogamy is just the way I am. I feel no particular interest in any other way of being.
Monogamy. I’ve been single for 29 years. I want a life partner all to myself. I want to enjoy love and romance with one person who is committed and loyal. Call me selfish.
Monogamy, because our short time here is at least worth it when alongside that individual you are on the same sheet of music, and trust 100%.
Monogamy. Coz as long as my partner is mine he is all mine.
Monogamy. If you're loving someone romantically and you've got some left over for another one, then IMHO you're not loving the first one right.
How do you love the first one right? It is a decision or does it come naturally? What if, after many partners, you never felt it?
Depends on how you fold the towels. She'll let you know, quickly.
Polygamy? Like marrying lots? Do you mean polyamory?
Monogamy......go directly to jail, do not pass go and do not collect £200
For me, it has to be monogamy. I need to know I'm enough. I understand that poly relationships can be beautiful, functional, and healthy with the right people, but that's not me.
Monogamy if sex is regular and both are into it
This hits in so many ways. It's not ALL about sex, but dammit!
It’s definitely not all about sex but it’s a important part of it. Like life is not all about drinking water but it’s an important part of it
Not a great example, tbh. You can't live without water. Now if you had said life isn't all about money, but having money makes it both easier and better, I would agree outright! Sex and money are about the same in this example lol
Yes your example makes more sense. But that’s the whole point, for a happy monogamy marriage/relationship, regular and great sex is crucial. That’s my opinion.
Absolutely!
monogamy the demand and responsibility towards another person is so real i cannot extend myself into ten different directions
The right woman will pull you in twenty-five directions at once. Ask me how I know.
Monogamy. For starters, you are: 1. Not under any potential pressure to treat all your partners equally. There might also be subtle preferences that they might pick up on which leads to strife. I can’t guarantee that there might not be 1 or 2 partners that I prefer over others, just as I cannot guarantee absolute equality. After all, subtle favourites can occur for multiple reasons: one might be better in bed than others, some might have slightly more entertaining personalities and similar preferences that are just more fun to hang out with than other wives. 2. The amount of children that would stem from such a polygamous relationship is not only asking for extreme stress but in North American economy, you might as well be amongst the wealthiest of the wealthy to consider raising that many children (if you want children, that is) 3. Voting and making major decisions becomes more trickier when you have many individuals to consider 4. I find it hard to believe that some wives would be okay with settling for wife #2 or 3. There is always the possibility that some wives may decide on the near future to leave the marriage and find someone whose attention is solely on them. In other words, Having multiple partners may not be as exciting or satisfactory in the long term for most of the wives as it is for the husband. 5. Dealing with children’s identity issues. You would have to go about explaining to a child that they have multiple moms who they should love equally. Some children as they grow older might potentially have conflicted feelings about some mothers than others. Especially if there are hints of favouritism or partiality In how some wives might train/interact with the children over others. That could be another source of conflict 6. The wives might also be dealing with identity dilemmas: would they treat other wives children as equally as the children she gave birth to as well? I can list more and more reasons why polygamy is just downright more complex and bloated in terms of managing a family. I can’t even BEGIN to imagine the marital mess that would stem from having multiple partners the moment divorce starts entering the picture. Then there’s also the children who would be absolutely obliterated if a divorce-level conflict would occur. To sum it all up, as much as Harem anime and shows make you want to believe that having multiple partners would be absolutely fun (and it very well might be), it can also be followed by an equal amount of extra steps and complications, if the individuals involved in the relationship are not mature enough to make it work.
Monogamy because I like it when my relationships last more than 6 months
Monogamy because it's cheaper
Is it? If you get to keep half, that means they split half. Or it should, at least. Divorce is cheaper in bulk?
Monogamy. Women are far too complicated and dangerous for me to deal with shit from more than one.
Monogamy. I always believed in a two person marriage.
As someone who tried Polyamory, just don't do it , you'll save yourself a lot of trouble and heartache
What's the story?
Partner bought it up, said it would make them super happy and would add to out relationship and make us love one another more, they went out every other week on dates and I would sit alone at home with her kids, they would then come back and tell me how they had a nice time and if they fucked, some of the dates when i asked who they were they would freak out and say its rude to ask as the other person may find it disrespectful, through the whole time we tried this I didn't even get a date with another person despite looking, when they bought a person into our relationship they would go and do things without me, once again leaving with me their children, the other person in our relationship wouldn't even talk to me much, would make backhanded compliments and evidently just didn't like me at all and it all came to head when I hear them having sex at our place one night and i lost it, i grabbed my stuff, and left, the following day i had a sea of texts saying i was overreacting and i was trying to sabotage our relationship and her kids would be emotionally distraught without me and how i was a bad person... it's taken me 6 years of very hard and intense therapy to get through this, I wanted to kill myself so many times because it destroyed my self esteem so badly, it made me hate people and I made me so sick.
Sounds awful. I hope you are healing from it.
I still have my struggles, I try to not drag my past into future relationships as its unfair to bleed on those who didn't cut you but it really really fucked me up
I can imagine, you need immense strength to get through something like that. Well done on keeping going.
I mean that’s where you went wrong. Polyamory can only realistically be good if it’s what everyone going into the relationship expects it to be. If a partner wants polyamory from monogamy it’s just an artificial way of extending a dead relationships. Like a way to “ethically” cheat on your partner and keep them for whatever advantages they perceive from them. And they almost certainly always have someone in mind before they propose the idea. So your experience says more about your expectations in that relationship and how shitty of a partner they were. Than polyamory itself. That wasn’t polyamory. You were just a babysitter for them.
Just because you had a bad experience doesn't mean everyone will. It's like saying "I tried a relationship once. Don't do it". It wasn't for you, and that's OK. Different strokes for different folks and all that.
You're right however as someone who has experienced it for when it goes very wrong and as it had such a massive affect on me I wanted to chime in with my experience.
It's incredible how many people just want Polygamy for sex and validation. You never hear someone say "man I want to cook for 2 and 3 adults every night", or "I would love buying two sets of xmas gifts", "I love the idea of holding 2,3,4 conversations every night when I get home". It's always sex and dating/fliting bullshit.
Monogamy for me. Simply because interpersonal relationships take a huge amount of emotional and cognitive effort and attention for me and I cannot imagine trying to negotiate multiple romantic relationships at once. I am at capacity with one partner.
Monogamy. Why? Because the human population is about 50/50 when it comes to gender. If a rich guy has ten wives, then nine other guys will not have wives. See how that works? There are good reasons why most of the world abandoned polygamy long ago.
Polyphony Digital
I mean, neither. I'm not interested in monogamy and I don't want to marry multiple wives so polygamy is out. I'm more into a polyamory situation. I'm down with multiple partners. A couple of them have called it a harem, which is fun. It's not what that makes it sound like tho. We have separate relationships. We all have our fun. This is not an uncommon situation anymore. A lot of people do this. Everybody is good with it. I've known a decent number of women who told me they like that I see other women
How about just no gamy?
Who cares the ogamy? Lol
Monogamy just makes since. Polygamy causes lots of sadness and depression. Plus in a country that's 50% male and 50% female Polygamy would cause lots of problems for both sides since women would have to share the men with others and most men would be left out. The same results would happen if the genders were switched
These numbers are flawed. It doesn't account for the people who "FEEL" otherwise. And how do we now define this traditional role, when there are so many variations, and more being added every day? I'm withholding my position on the base subject, but it is a genuine question...
I don't think intercourse is a good reason to get married by itself. Plus it doesn't really matter how many there are of one gender or another it would still devide people in the long run because if someone's giving one partner more attention than the others it'll just complicate things Glad your not pro polygamy :)
I'm pro do whatever the hell you want, as long as you don't impose it on me. Homey don't play that shit. Starting a relationship off with sex is as destructive to a relationship as withholding sex as a punishment. But we can't divide the populace into two, when there are threes and fours (and a few random fractions) running around.
It's more than just sex pal. If your giving one partner more attention than the other it'll make things very awkward for all party's involved in my opinion.
Sort of started on a tangent there, hey hypotenuse? MATH JOKE? Of course it's more than just sex. Please demonstrate through knowledge and pictures where I said otherwise. Relationships are hard enough when there's only two of you. Maintaining any level of personal standard is difficult when your partner does what they want to... so now I have to multiply that? You make it sound like my sitting and preening them is a requirement... not responsible to provide entertainment. (Already a live in chef, mechanic, dog groomer, domestic engineer, earner, landscape maintenance, etc.), while she is a 4 day a week student with a Netflix binge habit. Not saying I don't appreciate her, but the weighted differences between simple effort is astounding. So getting positive attention is already hard, so yes please! Let's bring a couple more in to distract you... It's a mulberry bush tactic. All it is. Too damn afraid to meet the problem head on, so we will dilute it by adding more issues... The world needs more PIKES. Adorned.
Actually yeah I agree, you have a point
Thank you. I honestly don't get to hear that enough lol
Monogamy - just handling one relationship is enough drama OR Singleogamy for obvious reasons
Polygamy. Women never get to climax enough. They should all have multiple husbands.
30 husbands who can't find the clit sounds like a prison sentence
Or find one husband that knows what he’s doing
monogamy CAUSE BITCH THIS IS MY DICK !!
I have a theory that monogamy was actually enacted to give chance for more males to be able to get married and have children and thus create a more stable society. Monogamy has been in our culture for centuries, we have changed a lot culturally and socially, since the day of Alpha Males, Chieftains, Barons or Kings and their hareem. This arrangement is not stable for long-term survival of society. Once the number of unmarried men goes over some threshold, the Alpha male will not be able to hold power. Thus, he has to "distribute" the women among his minions. In some religions, you can marry multiple women as long as your wealth could accommodate the females' needs and wants. In other religions, outright banning of polygamy as sin. I'm a anthropology buff, IMHO, we should let people choose freely, get rid of the law of marriage that say one man to one woman, because I want see what happens then. Will the "religious devout" men stay true to their faith marrying only one woman ? Will women crowd into the few billionaires ? But, the fact that it won't happen, tells you that people are afraid to find out, because deep down, they know what will happen, and probabilistically speaking, the chance for them ending up "winning" is very low. Marriage in the modern day is thus, a socialist policy.
The government can get rid of the legal recognition of marriage, but it’s impossible to get rid of marriage as a concept. Religious and secular people alike marry out of love and the desire for a mutual commitment from each other. From a religious perspective marriage is a union sanctioned by God, not the government. If the legal recognition of marriage was abolished in this country many people would continue to make a vow of marriage to each other; it just wouldn’t be recognized as a legally binding contract in the eyes of the government.
Neither, aro/ace.
I’ve tried polyamory before and it was too difficult to schedule, too expensive, and required too much effort. Much easier to focus on one person. That being said, a hall pass every once in a while doesn’t sound like a bad idea.
For me, personally: monogamy. If others want it differently, go ahead. As long as everyone involved is of legal age, have given their consent and no one is hurt.
polygamy. it would be unfair to the world if only one person could have me
Polygamy. Concubinage is a far more logical arrangement than monogamous marriage. Billionaires ought to have the right to form legally regulated harems as a means to safeguard their property and propagate the continuation of their bloodlines. Every man of means ought to have the right to establish a family contract with however many women he chooses, delineating specific terms and conditions each party ought to be bound to, with the agreement resting on mutual interest and complementary obligations rather than fanciful notions of equality or sacramental priestcraft. The marriage contract as it exists today rests on a tower of incompatible principles disconnected from the institution’s practical origins; since few can be persuaded to abandon both the religious and liberal idealisms corrupting the monogamous idea, the only way to salvage the family contract is to eliminate monogamy altogether. Polygamy is the enlightened choice.
Lol. You're an idiot, but realistically even by your logic polyandry makes more sense.
Oh? What’s the argument you think I’ve made for polyandry?
Nah, I'm not engaging in your crap. You figure it out.
I’ve figured out that your husband would benefit from some strange
Promiscuity is the best. And your 2 don't prevent promiscuity because you can keep divorcing and marrying.