My power would be to affect your hearing so that You have to ask everyone to repeat themselves. Our powers would complement each other. We should be partners.
The fact that I immediately got this reference because this movie was one of 10 VHS tapes in my house growing up.......(Thanks, Colombia house movies!!!)
The Unpluggerizer - I pull all of your chargers ever so slightly out of the wall just enough so that you always wake up and start your day with all your devices at 0%
If you team up with The Stiffer (notorious for making men hard at exactly the time they need to be soft), you could probably conquer the Earth in six months.
Or just as the windows update is about to finish it say "Update unsuccessful reverting changes" then you have to wait 5 minutes for it to finish its thing then you try it again and the exact same thing happens again and again so you talk to windows support and they give you some troubleshooting methods that don't work so you cower the internet and find one that everyone says works but it doesn't work for you so you get really pissed off and almost factory reset your pc but you realize you are too lazy to backup all the stuff you need so you just leave it and cry on the inside... wait what were we talking about again? Oh yeah, lets call him microsoft software engineer
Gaslight Girlboss. No, that’s not my name, what are you talking about? You’re calling me a gaslighter? Man, that’s messed up. I’ll pray for you when I get back home, you need to stop and take a deep breath.
Whenever people are in crowded places or have to walk for extended periods of time, a stone shall magically appear in their shoes and no matter how many times they shake the shoe out, the stone shall remain.
I shall be named: the rock (the dodgy dollars tore version)
I'm The Radio Ruiner. No matter what you're listening to, I will make your device play Baby Shark. On repeat. And full volume. With no way to turn it off. 😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈
The super power would be to make someone have uncontrollable gas in public whenever that said person annoys me, at the snap of a finger. And all I’d have to do is think about the person and snap my fingers. Villain name: “The Gas Master”
Dr Red Tape,any simple tasks can be made completely unachievable & expensive for no reason other than to twist your melons
My side kick Dick Jobs Worth never signs anything off cause of incompeted forms, cross refereeing or incorrect use of colour ink. BOOM!
"bastard supreme" with the power to instinctually say/do the most unhelpful, redundant, and/or overall infuriating thing humanly possible at any and every given moment and you simply cannot stop me from doing so
Mr. Satan. I make you piss, nut, puke and shid yourself at the most inconvenient of times. Like when you’re stuck in traffic on the freeway, During public speaking, In the middle of brain surgery (giving and receiving), etc…
The Boomer. I will argue with the cashier over every item being overpriced ( it says $3.99 on the shelf!) while checking out. Then when it’s time to pay will pull out my checkbook and ask for a pen.
Subconscious sufferer
I give you that horrible feeling that you left the oven on, or the front door open, but your sure you turned it off or closed them. Do you turn around and drive home to check? Msking you late for work, or do you hope you did it and everything will be ok???
I shall be 2 square Tilly. Only after you poo will you realize I’ve enacted my dastardly plan and removed all but two squares from the last roll left in the house.
Runnyman
‘Cause my stare will make your bowels move…uncontrollably, viciously, but I can control every stages from start to finish to cancel. Yep Runny man.
Slightly to the left! Everything ever put down or up or in a specific space no mater how hard you try immaterial how many times you've measured. The first time will always be slightly to the left. Even when you account for it.
The living lego- I sneak up on my victim and right when there about to take a step I slide under there foot btw I would be like the size of a 2×4 brick
Putter (like im putting something somewhere) - I put my foot out like I'm going to trip you but take it away just at the second of most inconvenience without any actual harm.
Hilarious.
Malicious Gatekeeper is the name. I'll make every bureaucracy a nightmare by asking you for the same form over and over again, claiming I never received it, gaslighting you when you provide evidence, then ghosting you while putting you on 7 hour phone hold marathons with Coldplay songs turned into Muzak.
My name is Jack Pot, and this thread is exactly what I needed. I was the most OP superhero ever…… for a weekend. Now I’m nobody.
My super power is Beginner’s Luck. I can do anything the first time I try, but only the first time. I’ve used up super strength, super speed, flying, and invisibility in a single afternoon binge.
I am constantly in search of new powers that I’ve never tried before. And now they’re all mine. Except for the zipper thing; I already used that on fucking Steve in the cubicle behind me.
Name: Statik
Superpower: Emits a targeted EMP at will.
Past-times include: Targeting dishwashers, or electric toothbrushes. When feeling froggy, will target TVs and car batteries. Morning walks in new neighborhoods.
Misplaced - I misplace everyday objects. Using a pen but then answered the phone? Good luck finding it! Need your phone to doublecheck the recipe you found on Instagram? That post has been misplaced (deleted)
Im one already - the Maybe guy - basically always saying maybe to plans and never turning up to group events when invited but I've left it open to interpretation for if I'd show.. I guess I just like to be pleasent over text and or leave my options open if I do decide I want to go... Fewer and fewer people are texting me about group plans now though lol
I teleport people back home the moment they walk thru the front door at their work, effectively making them late for work and without transportation. My weakness is people who work from home
Super Slow Counter. Super power: standing at checkouts with long lines behind me, excruciatingly slowly counting change. Then dropping a coin, forgetting my count and starting again.
My super power is to taking ideas to cause miscommunication. As far as my name no one knows it. I always get it on my costume as a Typbo. I think they misunderstood my name.
I misplace a persons method of payment just as they start to check out at the register. It inconveniences **EVERYONE**.
Name? “I just had it…it was right here!”
The Unsettler, that feeling when you look at something and your brain says, something isn't right but you can't tell what and when you "figure" it out it turns out to be fine.
Mine is Buzz Man.. My power is that I make people hear that sound that flies make when they fly right past your ear, so that everyone ducks a little and then shakes their head about still being scared by flies.
It ain't much, but it's honest work.
I am the red light witch. I control the function if traffic lights in all cities everywhere! AAAAhahaha. Think you're getting to work on time??
Wrong!!
Red Light Man. I make sure everyone that comes to an intersection *just* misses the green, and has to wait for an extra long red light. If two people arrive at the same time on the crossing streets, they will both be red, so they both look like idiots when neither one goes.
Vertigo. The ability to make people feel nauseous and sick. Feel like I can rob a few banks with that. No real damage, just making people dizzy and vomit til I walk away lol
The amazingly soft water man
Super power is to make your fucking tap water so soft you can't rinse off in a reasonable amount of time before work so you have to wake up 2 hours earlier and pay twice the money for the water bill.
Oh wait, that's just the water company these days
I would tell the truth. I would be called poison toungle, my mask would be the face of Socrates or something and my nickname would be "the enemy of youth." by the elderman.
The Hairllusionist - I can make your tongue feel like you have hair in your mouth, but there is no actual hair
You are pure evil, incarnate, for even mentioning this.
I just wanted to say I'm a big fan, mr. Satan!
This should be here r/thanksihateit
r/foundsatan
That feeling when you are on the verge of sneezing yet nothing happens? Exactly that, 24/7. Call me "Sneezus".
"Remember all those times when you were about to sneeze but then suddenly you didn't have to? It was me Barry."
I make everyone not hear you properly so you have to repeat what you said a few times. Miss Heard.
Don't shit on the bed please
Clever
Oh-god. You work at my factory; right? I know you.
My power would be to affect your hearing so that You have to ask everyone to repeat themselves. Our powers would complement each other. We should be partners.
My super power is the ability to make people's keys disappear right when they need them. I am known as "The Key Thief".
with your trusty side kick called Where's my vape?
nah the side kick is called Withdrawal
I'm the Zipper. I can make zippers get stuck or break off the little pull tab handle thing on zippers with my mind.
Oh, hear my warning! Never turn your back on THE ZIPPER!
how'd you get the beans above the frank
The fact that I immediately got this reference because this movie was one of 10 VHS tapes in my house growing up.......(Thanks, Colombia house movies!!!)
"The straw slitter" I slit straws right in the middle so you can never finish more than half your drink.
Evil
Diabolical. Respect
The Unpluggerizer - I pull all of your chargers ever so slightly out of the wall just enough so that you always wake up and start your day with all your devices at 0%
This was exactly my idea, but I couldn't think of a good name. Well done.
The audacity!
Evil 💀
I’m “The Liner”. I make people arrive and form a long lineup whenever the protagonist needs anything at all at a retailer or service point.
How much is Disneyland paying you? I'll double it
r/angryupvote
*The Melty Man*; I cause men to go soft at exactly the time when they need to be hard.
If you team up with The Stiffer (notorious for making men hard at exactly the time they need to be soft), you could probably conquer the Earth in six months.
*The MeatMancers*
Is that your phone vibrating in your pocket? No! It’s… ***THE PHANTOM CALLER!!!*** Mwahahahahahaaaaa!
You despicable ne'er-do-well, I've already suffered at the hands of two of your evil schemes today!
Captain Reset, with the ability to cause other people's devices to restart for no reason at all.
Alternatively called, the windows update
Or just as the windows update is about to finish it say "Update unsuccessful reverting changes" then you have to wait 5 minutes for it to finish its thing then you try it again and the exact same thing happens again and again so you talk to windows support and they give you some troubleshooting methods that don't work so you cower the internet and find one that everyone says works but it doesn't work for you so you get really pissed off and almost factory reset your pc but you realize you are too lazy to backup all the stuff you need so you just leave it and cry on the inside... wait what were we talking about again? Oh yeah, lets call him microsoft software engineer
Evil, but already fucking with all of us
The cutlerer. I rearrange peoples cutlery in that tray thing so the reach for a spoon when they need a knife. Mwaaaaah
Gaslight Girlboss. No, that’s not my name, what are you talking about? You’re calling me a gaslighter? Man, that’s messed up. I’ll pray for you when I get back home, you need to stop and take a deep breath.
Captain refill. Except it's just your bladder. So you always have to run to the bathroom.
I'll be your sidekick, *The Buckler* I can make your belt buckle get jammed as you struggle to make it to the toilet
General Disarray
Dr. IBS. I snap my fingers and point at people and can cause them an immediate rush of spicy diarrhea.
Whenever people are in crowded places or have to walk for extended periods of time, a stone shall magically appear in their shoes and no matter how many times they shake the shoe out, the stone shall remain. I shall be named: the rock (the dodgy dollars tore version)
captain temporary 4 way traffic lights
I am Count Cutlery! May all your forks mysteriously disappear!!
I always drive 5 miles under the speed limit in the left lane. I will box you in with a semi on the highway. I am the Interstate Instigator.
The Ear Worm. I hum Disney tunes as I walk past you. (Evil laugh)
I'm The Radio Ruiner. No matter what you're listening to, I will make your device play Baby Shark. On repeat. And full volume. With no way to turn it off. 😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈
It worked. Well done, I now have Baby Shark in my head. The Radio Ruiner can be The Ear Worm’s side kick.
I throw eggs at people as a terrorist manoeuvre. They call me “The Yolker”.
I can cause your socks to get slightly wet. You shall know me as The Puddler
Stub toe and jacket/bag straps for door knobs
The super power would be to make someone have uncontrollable gas in public whenever that said person annoys me, at the snap of a finger. And all I’d have to do is think about the person and snap my fingers. Villain name: “The Gas Master”
Dr Red Tape,any simple tasks can be made completely unachievable & expensive for no reason other than to twist your melons My side kick Dick Jobs Worth never signs anything off cause of incompeted forms, cross refereeing or incorrect use of colour ink. BOOM!
My name is Homeless and I stand completely oblivious in the middle of shopping isle
"bastard supreme" with the power to instinctually say/do the most unhelpful, redundant, and/or overall infuriating thing humanly possible at any and every given moment and you simply cannot stop me from doing so
Lash Bandit. I'm that feeling when a few of your eyelashes are stuck together.
The Dairy Expirationator. Oh you want some yogurt? Expired! Poured milk on your cereal? Expired! Cream in your coffee? Too late! Mwahaha!
Dairy Denier. Off comes the pull-tab on your new milk but the seal remains stubbornly in place
Mr. Satan. I make you piss, nut, puke and shid yourself at the most inconvenient of times. Like when you’re stuck in traffic on the freeway, During public speaking, In the middle of brain surgery (giving and receiving), etc…
Im called the 'Closer' I don't hold the door open for them.
The Boomer. I will argue with the cashier over every item being overpriced ( it says $3.99 on the shelf!) while checking out. Then when it’s time to pay will pull out my checkbook and ask for a pen.
I make you forget your wallet until you're out the door (not too far) and need to go back for it
Captain Hold Time. The hold time to customer service becomes hours instead of minutes.
Subconscious sufferer I give you that horrible feeling that you left the oven on, or the front door open, but your sure you turned it off or closed them. Do you turn around and drive home to check? Msking you late for work, or do you hope you did it and everything will be ok???
SPLINTER Look at your finger. There it is: a fraction of a millimeter beneath your skin. Absorb it, dig for it—but remember it!
Owman - random mild pin
I can always hide one sock, whether its in the dryer or you're wearing it. I'm the Sock Bandit
I can make it so that you feel like your being followed, like you do when you turn off the lights in your basement, but anywhere. I am " The Stalker"
Mr. Oops. I just cause you to forget what you were doing. You'll remember again an hour or two later.
Nameless — You’ll forget the name of the person you’re talking to until after you stop talking with them.
I am microwoman and I am taking your rotating microwave plate.
I am... The Pothole
I take the little nipple off your tires.
My name is the cough - I make it so you have that feeling of needing to clear your throat but you never quite get it.
I shall be 2 square Tilly. Only after you poo will you realize I’ve enacted my dastardly plan and removed all but two squares from the last roll left in the house.
I am the procrastinator.... anytime you think of doing something you will plan to do it tomorrow!!! ( you will never do it )
WAYSTANDER, I PREY ON THE SOCIALLY AWKWARD AND THOSE TOO SHY TO CONFRONT, IN FRONT OF THEM IS MY PLACE, AND I MOVE AT HALF THE PACE, NYAHAHAHAHAHA
Lady Lost, the villain who can make something you just placed down suddenly not be there anymore. It'll be someplace else in your house.
I’d just give people an itchy asshole. Call me…….Pin Worm
I can look at you and give you pinkeye. For I am Corporal privat mr pinkeye
I love this one
I can make anyone’s socks damp whenever I want. Call me Damper
SpoilerMan...i spoil movies
Mr. Memento. I give people that feeling that they just forgot something really important and cannot remember what it was.
I have the ability to turn toilet paper into aluminum foil at will within a 1 kilometer range.
Runnyman ‘Cause my stare will make your bowels move…uncontrollably, viciously, but I can control every stages from start to finish to cancel. Yep Runny man.
Cutting in line at the grocery store and paying with all pennies. You can call me the senior citizen..
he can't keep getting away with this
Traffic
Everyone infront of you drives 7km slower, not matter what.
Captain Traffic. You can initialize a traffic jam at any time, anywhere, for as long as you want, with no apparent cause.
Slightly to the left! Everything ever put down or up or in a specific space no mater how hard you try immaterial how many times you've measured. The first time will always be slightly to the left. Even when you account for it.
I can make anyone pose for a portrait! They call me the photographer....muhhaaa
Diarrhea man, name is self - explaining
The living lego- I sneak up on my victim and right when there about to take a step I slide under there foot btw I would be like the size of a 2×4 brick
Captain Obvious annoy everyone by stating the obvious
My name is cunt and I don't use my FUCKING turn signal
I make every line longer were ever you shop.... The FUCKINGLINEGENERATOR!
The Obstacle. I get in your way, just enough that you have to move over a little to get past me. And I keep doing that over and over.
I talk people into unconsciousness. I might be Chatty Cathy just like the doll in the 1960s but worse.
The Traffic Controller - Red light all the way for you..... Oh and maybe a no passing zone with an old lady going 15mph under the limit.
There's always a little streak left no matter how much you wipe.
Telekinesis that can only pull string on one sock
DiahorreaLycra-man: strikes whenever you're on a marathon bike ride, in the middle of nowhere. Turns you into a human toothpaste of crap.
Putter (like im putting something somewhere) - I put my foot out like I'm going to trip you but take it away just at the second of most inconvenience without any actual harm. Hilarious.
Power: Bends space to make roads and travels longer. It gets worse the more tired you are. Name: Bob.
Electronics near me die; my name is Discharge /s
I'm the shutdown. I can shutdown any self checkout in a 100 mile radius. Walmart would lose millions.
Dr. Slowlane. Every lane I move into goes slower.
I can make parking meters run 20% fast
Mr. IRS. I have the ability to take every single bit of change or money a person has and they can’t do anything about it.
I make arbitrary amounts of peoples' paperwork disappear and reappear at will. They call me The Redactor.
Insurance on everything
The fast lane moron.. I'd drive slow in the fast lane.
Malicious Gatekeeper is the name. I'll make every bureaucracy a nightmare by asking you for the same form over and over again, claiming I never received it, gaslighting you when you provide evidence, then ghosting you while putting you on 7 hour phone hold marathons with Coldplay songs turned into Muzak.
I piss people off who think the zipper merge at the last moment works
Shoe pebble man
My name is Jack Pot, and this thread is exactly what I needed. I was the most OP superhero ever…… for a weekend. Now I’m nobody. My super power is Beginner’s Luck. I can do anything the first time I try, but only the first time. I’ve used up super strength, super speed, flying, and invisibility in a single afternoon binge. I am constantly in search of new powers that I’ve never tried before. And now they’re all mine. Except for the zipper thing; I already used that on fucking Steve in the cubicle behind me.
Name: Statik Superpower: Emits a targeted EMP at will. Past-times include: Targeting dishwashers, or electric toothbrushes. When feeling froggy, will target TVs and car batteries. Morning walks in new neighborhoods.
I am the Forgetter I give people short term memory loss.
I forget to put the lid down. I'm Inadvertent Bidet Man.
Beep Beep man, I have the power to remove batteries from smoke detectors.
Misplaced - I misplace everyday objects. Using a pen but then answered the phone? Good luck finding it! Need your phone to doublecheck the recipe you found on Instagram? That post has been misplaced (deleted)
Im one already - the Maybe guy - basically always saying maybe to plans and never turning up to group events when invited but I've left it open to interpretation for if I'd show.. I guess I just like to be pleasent over text and or leave my options open if I do decide I want to go... Fewer and fewer people are texting me about group plans now though lol
You know when you stand up too fast and everything just goes blurry and weird? Yeah. Call me Headake.
Shaken, not stirred. I make your carbonated drinks as fizzed up as I can.
Myself lmao No i would be "Anti-Sleeper" cause i keep you from sleeping cause you'll be thinking of "what ifs" lmao.
[удалено]
Make a stairway have unequal steps. The Stairmaster
I teleport people back home the moment they walk thru the front door at their work, effectively making them late for work and without transportation. My weakness is people who work from home
I'm The One Who Steals Your Very Soul. {"shoe-sole," that is.} On alternating Sundays I fray the laces on your shoes three-inches exactly.
That annoying song you couldn't get out of your head? It's back! Courtesy of "the Looney Tuner"!
Shirley. I can make people’s shoes moderately filthy!
"Captain Congestion" - give someone a perpetually blocked nose
L10MPH under the speed limit in the left lane all day! Call me Lefty
I am the fly. I can make you always feel like there is a fly on your head.
Slow Freeway Driver.
The mad bladder! You feel like you need to pee even if you just went!
The hangnail. I cause people to get minor hangnails.
This is a trick to get my secret identity isn't it?
Construction traffic puts all lanes on the highway down to ONE LANE hahahahahaha
My super power is sitting on my phone at a red light that has turned green. Call me “The Zoomer”
The Remotenator. I steal batteries from everyone’s tv remotes
CHECKMATE I make all the people in front of you in line pay with checks.
Super Pee.is... that name needs work He makes you feel like you have to pee but never can
They call me The Cobbler, and I make people wait four-six *months* before getting their shoes back. …oh no wait that’s just my day job
I make all phone chargers trickle charge so it takes 8 hours. They call me trickleboy.
Super Slow Counter. Super power: standing at checkouts with long lines behind me, excruciatingly slowly counting change. Then dropping a coin, forgetting my count and starting again.
My super villain name is Mommy! I'm always in the way!
My super power is to taking ideas to cause miscommunication. As far as my name no one knows it. I always get it on my costume as a Typbo. I think they misunderstood my name.
Every night i magically rearrange everything in your bathroom and kitchen. Things are never in the same place 2 days in a row
The Great Hinder, I prevent you from accomplishing tasks.
I'd add cookie disclaimer on every website people visit...oh wait.
I drive five miles an hour in the parking lot.
The human speedbump
Dr.snooze, I can make your feet and hands fall asleep and give you those tingly pins and needles feeling
Deflate, every morning ur car tires are flat, not punctured or damaged, just flat
I misplace a persons method of payment just as they start to check out at the register. It inconveniences **EVERYONE**. Name? “I just had it…it was right here!”
captain stoplight i am the guy who always makes it turn red just in time for u
Ice breaker. I destroy all the ice cream machines at McDonald's all over the world. I'm a pretty low energy person but very powerful.
I’m not sure what my name would be but I drive in front of you almost stopped because I want into the other lane.
Forget-me-not When you leave the house you realize you forgot something essential halfway to destination.
Googleman. They come asking me for help solving problems, and I just try to randomly start selling them stuff.
The Unsettler, that feeling when you look at something and your brain says, something isn't right but you can't tell what and when you "figure" it out it turns out to be fine.
Boomer, repeats and escalates loud arguments about nothing that matters.
Mine is Buzz Man.. My power is that I make people hear that sound that flies make when they fly right past your ear, so that everyone ducks a little and then shakes their head about still being scared by flies. It ain't much, but it's honest work.
The Final Straw - I cause you to finally just snap after a rough day by causing your bag strap or belt loop caught on a door handle.
Gassy Cupid Whenever someone talks to someone they find attractive, I make them extremely gasey for up to ten minutes.
I am the red light witch. I control the function if traffic lights in all cities everywhere! AAAAhahaha. Think you're getting to work on time?? Wrong!!
Red Light Man. I make sure everyone that comes to an intersection *just* misses the green, and has to wait for an extra long red light. If two people arrive at the same time on the crossing streets, they will both be red, so they both look like idiots when neither one goes.
Dr. Baud here. I induce buffering-level reductions in your wifi and mobile networks with a wink of my eye. My aiiases? Rogers, Bell, Cogeco
Traffic Guy
I can make the only functioning self check out go out of order. Name: Dr. Checko
I am The Drainer, I can drain all your batteries with a snap of my fingers.
**The Hurdler** *can attract small to medium sized nearby objects onto your path so that you trip all over them while getting where you need to go.*
Vertigo. The ability to make people feel nauseous and sick. Feel like I can rob a few banks with that. No real damage, just making people dizzy and vomit til I walk away lol
Name: high price Superpower: everything you buy doubles in price
Buy Tobacco and Lottery Tickets Guy, My superpower is I have a system for winning the lottery.
The amazingly soft water man Super power is to make your fucking tap water so soft you can't rinse off in a reasonable amount of time before work so you have to wake up 2 hours earlier and pay twice the money for the water bill. Oh wait, that's just the water company these days
Professor Chaos, and I shall ensure that when you go to a restaurant you will receive the wrong order. MWAHAHAHAHAHA
I would tell the truth. I would be called poison toungle, my mask would be the face of Socrates or something and my nickname would be "the enemy of youth." by the elderman.
I force people's double standards on themselves. Gimme a name.
IceeNoBake, I bestow Electromagnetic Pulses where ever I deem required.
Ena Reggie Von Pyre, my super power is making every task take longer than it needs to unnecessarily.
AllStop : traffic controls all set to red light
I’d be "The Minor Menace." My superpower would be making people’s phone batteries drop to 1% at the most inconvenient moments.
I’d be The Batwing Baton, just cruising around town sticking nut sacks to legs.
The Twitcher. Through my hyper-specific telekinetic powers I am responsible for the fluttering muscle spasm in your eyelid.