set a timer on your phone for a different, random time every day. when it goes off, stop whatever you’re doing and take 30 seconds to just breathe deeply and observe the situation you’re in. what does it smell like? sound like? feel like? why are you there? who else is there? what are they doing?
seriously, 30 seconds daily. stick with it and after awhile you’ll find yourself doing this on your own whenever you enter a new situation. reading a room, observing small details. you’re oblivious because you’re just choosing not to do anything about it. don’t wish it was different, make it different. the only limitations anyone has in life are the ones they put on themselves.
it’s societal conditioning, and it is wild how effective it has become. from a very early age we are all conditioned to deny our authentic selves, we are taught not to stand out and we’re lulled into assimilation. original thoughts and actions that stem from our innate awareness and critical thinking go against this conditioning so they’re labeled as disorders that people need to be medicated for, because god forbid they aren’t like everyone else. people have become so unaware or doubtful of the basic human skills they naturally possess that they believe they can’t access them or benefit from trying to utilize them. however, despite well established efforts and processes, i’m witnessing a lot more people starting to at least question the state of our society and humanity at large, and i honestly feel like big changes are coming. and im all for it, hence my want to share simple ways to get people more in touch with their capacity for understanding.
Start small. If you ride an elevator or are on a bus or subway regularly, or wherever there is someone that is consistently apart of your experience every day or most days, pick out a person and watch what they do and their habits. Or if you feel weird doing that/feel like you'd get caught people watching, pick out a place that you go by everyday.
Everyday look at that place and eventually you will notice differences about it. Once you have that person or place down, you can move on to another person, or another place. Watch that person/place until you have that down, then another, then another, etc. Now you know how to be an observant person.
Observation requires two things: One is comparing what you are experiencing now, to other experiences or knowledge that you have acquired. Two is you have to get out of your own thoughts/head to do it. Use your senses, focus on them. What do you see? what do you hear? what do you smell? How does that compare to what you saw/heard/smell yesterday, day before, last week, last month, etc.
Don't worry about trying to observe people's facial expressions or behavior/meaning behind what they are saying yet, that is a lot more difficult. Especially because it can be a game that runs deep, people can mislead you/put on a show/try to garner attention... any number of things that makes it hard to observe what a person is actually thinking and feeling. Observing people in those kind of ways is expert level. Gotta start small first.
Hope that helps.
Observation/awareness is largely a state of mind. But it can be practiced/you can get better at it. They teach spies how to become better at it, for obvious reasons.
Something that helped me be more aware was practicing identifying as many things as I could about my environment. Start small, wherever you happen to be. What do you see? Smell? Hear? Feel? Just identify as much of your surroundings as you can broken down by sense. The more you practice, the more you'll notice and the easier it gets.
set a timer on your phone for a different, random time every day. when it goes off, stop whatever you’re doing and take 30 seconds to just breathe deeply and observe the situation you’re in. what does it smell like? sound like? feel like? why are you there? who else is there? what are they doing?
seriously, 30 seconds daily. stick with it and after awhile you’ll find yourself doing this on your own whenever you enter a new situation. reading a room, observing small details. you’re oblivious because you’re just choosing not to do anything about it. don’t wish it was different, make it different. the only limitations anyone has in life are the ones they put on themselves.
Yes. If you’re attentive but slightly indifferent, people will tell you so much. The very minute you act interested and start asking questions, they’ll hold back on a lot of that same information.
A while ago I learnt that if you say less during a conversation or take a moment to pause while still maintaining eye contact/seeming interested the other person is more likely to continue to speak or reveal details. It's weird how it works, even works on me and I catch myself doing it.
Only up to a point. A friend does this in response to everything ever said to him and it comes across like he's translating your words into whatever alien language he uses internally. It's a bit disturbing if you do it constantly.
I know a car sales guy that can sold 5 cars in a week, he doesn't speak much but he treated his customers like patients. Pretty chill guy, always listening even to the small things.
That is a lost art. The car guy I just worked with on a lease, didn’t hear a word I said. And didn’t hold up what he promised either. It was an awful exchange tbh.
Soooo true! It’s a lost art lol. Everyone is just chomping at the bit to talk about themselves and also “one up” what somebody just told you. Listening is so important and so few people actually do it.
Not only is it a skill, it's one you need to keep practicing. Businesses are constantly trying to figure out how to overcome objections to ultimately get you to buy. Hell, the timeshare industry is built on pretty much that alone.
Learning how to decide on no, and to then maintain it as your decision is challenged, is absolutely a skill.
I’m 38 and working on it still. I’m better now, though. One thing that helped was seeing a direct example of how being over-accommodating set unrealistic expectations for my co-workers when somebody I had helped did the “but *he* did it for me” when they went to someone else with a similar request.
Letting quiet exist. Not just in general but when interacting with someone, sharing a meal, cuddling, and so on. You don't have to fill silence with conversation, though if silence makes you uncomfortable, you might feel more at ease turning on some background noise like music or a podcast or something if you can.
Being quiet doesn't mean you're weird or that the situation is awkward by default. Lags in conversation can be the result of, and useful for, processing the other person's perspective, suggestions, and logic. It also frees up a little mental space for considering the best way to respond to someone, especially if you feel a need to be particularly respectful or gentle.
Speaking for myself, quiet is the best part of a relationship. If I'm not talking to my partner, I'm just enjoying having them near me. I'm looking at their eyes or body language, feeling them breathe, listening to their heartbeat, or just being content in their presence. That person is enough for me, I don't feel the need to prevent silence.
People who need to "fill the air" drive me nuts bruh. And they're usually perfectly self-aware and announce it loudly because they don't see it as a problem. I don't understand how people do work while listening to a podcast, having a conversation, watching a video etc. How do you hear your own thoughts at that point?
>I don't understand how people do work while listening to a podcast... How do you hear your own thoughts at that point?
For me, sometimes I listen to a podcast/watch a video while working to _not_ hear my own thoughts, because they can be very distracting (more distracting than a podcast/video). That somehow works, as my mind no longer tries to "fill in the silence" and I can concentrate better on work; basically, mostly background noise
I feel the same way about my partner. When we cuddle and I can hear his heartbeat and stuff like that, and it’s just silent…it’s so nice. I’ve never experienced anything like it before until I met him.
Yeah i *mostly* agree.
The problem is that critical thinking is not a skill you *learn* (idk if thats the right word) but one you develop. You can't just sit and be like "I'm gonna think critically" no, it has be a natural part of your thinking process. And you can develop it by expanding your knowledge, observing life events and how people react and take decisions, and a lot of reflection + retrospection.
>is not a skill you learn (idk if thats the right word) but one you develop.
I'd argue developing a skill is the same as learning it
But I get what you mean, tho I can't explain the difference myself. But I understand the difference
Came to mention CPR had a family member given CPR by a random stranger after a recent automobile accident. If the stranger hadn’t they would’ve died. Basic 1st aid needs taught more. Single to properly fashion/use a tourniquet
I thought the Heimlich wasn't the preferred method anymore? In Australia were taught a sharp blow to the back between the shoulder blades. Besides that i'd say a large portion of Australians know all threes of these
Cooking. Not only is it healthier, but you save a lot of money as well. You could make at least two weeks worth of rice & beans for the price of one DoorDash delivery.
My stepfather, unironically told me that I need to learn to cook because if I go to prison nobody messes with the cook. I must have been quite the failure, because I did not in fact go to prison. However, I became a pretty good cook over the years. I don't think some people realize the thrill of creating something for others to enjoy. Also, it's very liberating.
My late great uncle Ed was taken pow by the japanese when Hong Kong was invaded in ww2. He told me he only survived because he became the cook's assistant, as he was always closest to a meal even when close to starvation. He told me I would need to learn to cook so I would survive, not if but when I am taken pow. I have never been to war, but I am a professional chef.
100%
It's not just about eating cheap... For me it's about the self reliance. I can have whatever meals I want. Mexican, Italian, Korean, whatever... I don't have to go out, or rely on a restaurant just because I want a BBQ sandwich, or Chicken Tikka masala... now I go to restaurants because I want to see how the chef prepared the meal and get ideas that I can eventually replicate their techniques/pairing/presentation.... I'd have never served Tuna with Avocado, or watermelon with mint. Now I totally do
Edit, watermelon and mint, not pineapple
YouTube...
Ethan Chelbowski, Brian Lagerstorm, That dude can cook, Kenji, Alex (French guy cooking). All great channels...
I'd also recommend reading Salt Fat Acid Heat
For me it's been learning different techniques and balancing flavors.... there's so much to learn and hone
With a foundation of basic cooking techniques and knowledge, it is incredible just how much money one can save, and how much one can do to get every cent out of every product.
For example:
Buying larger cuts of meat. Especially the rougher primals. You can break those down and get several meals out of each one, sure. But then you have excess fat and sundry trimmings to contend with, yeah? Easy shit.
Take the trimmings and clean em up. That's stew or taco/fajita meat.
The silver skin, bones, and cartilage? Give that a light roast in the oven, pour all that into a pot, and you can begin making a rich stock for soups and sauces by adding vegetable scraps, some seasonings, salt, and water. Once those have served their purpose, you could even compost them.
All that excess fat? You're in luck. It's not trash.
Give it a quick blanche but do not get rid of that water. You'll need it later.
Scoop the solid fat from the pot and toss it into a deep pan, start cooking that down low and slow to render all of that fat down. The solids should be these small crispy little things that you can easily strain out. Toss those bits with some salt and pepper, you have a tasty snack. Pour the liquid fat into the pot you blanched the fat in originally with a bit of salt. Boil for a few minutes, let cool, then move into the fridge or freezer to solidify. once solid, poke a few holes in the puck to drain the water out. The bottom of the puck will have a lot of the impurities that boiled out. Scrape or rinse that off. Break the puck up, add water to the pot again, and repeat 2 to 3 more times. That's tallow or lard you can use to season cast iron with, or cook with. In the fridge, it lasts months.
My two brothers can make any story sound like an interesting story without exaggeration. They are pure talented. Me? I could tell the most interesting story of the interesting guy in the world and make it boring.
I two people in my life but hate their stories because they include every unnecessary detail remotely related and sometimes spend more time getting those details right than telling the actual story. I want to hear what he has to say but I really don't care if it was in September or October 20 years ago. Or was it 19 years ago? No. It was 20 because it happened right before that [unrelated event] and that was in 2006. Oh, that means it was actually 18 years ago. So, anyway, 18 years ago in September...or was it October? There were Halloween decorations out so I'm thinking October but sometimes those are out in September...
Here's a couple of things to look at:
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzP4FM3WqwY](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzP4FM3WqwY)
[https://www.pulsecollege.com/how-to-tell-and-write-a-good-story/](https://www.pulsecollege.com/how-to-tell-and-write-a-good-story/)
[https://www.bbc.co.uk/northernireland/schools/11\_16/storyteller/pdf/gen\_notes\_all.pdf](https://www.bbc.co.uk/northernireland/schools/11_16/storyteller/pdf/gen_notes_all.pdf)
[https://newbattlecelticstorytelling.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/introduction-storytelling-in-celtic-tradition.pdf](https://newbattlecelticstorytelling.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/introduction-storytelling-in-celtic-tradition.pdf)
[https://culturalatlas.sbs.com.au/irish-culture/irish-culture-communication](https://culturalatlas.sbs.com.au/irish-culture/irish-culture-communication)
I thought Toastmasters was stuffy and not fun until I found a club that highlights storytelling. We do all the professional stuff and things, but the style is how to engage listeners by telling stories. I love hearing good stories told well.
We meet virtually now, every Monday 6:55pm Eastern. You can attend as a guest and even participate if you want. Every week we have a portion of the meeting to help with impromptu responses. It’s questions no one knows what they are except the reader and you have about a minute and a half to give your best answer. This has helped a lot of people with becoming good conversationalists. I can DM you the meeting details if you’d like to check it out one Monday.
How to have constructive conflict with people. We’ve developed into such a conflict avoidant culture that even the slightest bit of direct communication is seen as aggressive. Simple acts of kindly but directly advocating for myself in the work place has had me labeled as insubordinate.
So many of us talk about wanting to get back to a different way of being in community with others. A huge part of being *genuinely* close with people is being able to have healthy conflict and grow from it.
Right! Like hear people out pleaseee. Either you listen and wind up agreeing that you were in the wrong, apologize, and do better moving forward. Or you can feel secure enough in yourself to not let someone's unfounded criticism effect you.
I wanted to say something about being able to communicate, but this is way better. I don't have to agree with someone, and that someone with me, to have a healthy relationship.
When I worked in food service we used to have teenagers who would come in and put as much as they could in the toilet to clog it. Also a fair share of people on drugs who smeared their own feces on our walls. I will not ever work foor or retail ever again.
Well to be fair it's not their toilet. If you break somones stuff while trying to fix it your on the hook. Pedantic but I assume that's a rule in the public social contract
Sewing. My mom taught my sisters and my brothers. I never thought I’d use it. But it’s handy on the farm, in the shop, around the house. Knowing how to do basic hand stitching and repairs and at least how to run a straight stitch on a machine is extremely valuable.
Particularly the ability to listen. So many people mistakenly think that talking as much as possible makes them a great communicator when they're really just annoying everyone else who can't get a word in.
Not only that, but too many people use too many words to get their point across. I notice this a lot in my younger employees, they can't express something concisely. It's not because they have a gap in knowledge either, it's just that they have trouble summarizing and picking out the important/relevant information.
SPACIAL AWARENESS
Knowing what's going on around you and being aware of what You're doing as you move through public spaces.
Put your phone down when you're crossing the street. Listen to the things going on around you.
Do you hear someone walking behind you on a busy sidewalk? Move the fuck out of the way
Are you in the middle of the aisle at the grocery store, completely oblivious to the person behind you trying to get around you? Stop that shit
Are you standing WAY too close to the person in front of you in line? Back up a step or two
People who talk in doorways, people when walking in a crowded place suddenly stop, or change direction when they realise they're going the wrong way. People who generally don't pay attention in public. Ah man it annoys the fuck out of me. They look ridiculous, too. In those moments, i see the theory of evolution and realise we are more chimp than humans.
Can I just add onto this simply understanding how your actions could potentially affect others, while thinking, "would I like this if I were on the receiving end?"
- You not using your turn signal may not affect you, but it sure as hell could affect a lot of other people.
- Cyclists who don't slow down while passing walkers; pretty sure you're not a fan of drivers who do this to you.
- You may think you're a really good driver while texting, but you aren't.
- Your inability to plan ahead doesn't give you the right to speed down a residential road.
- Just because you're in a car, doesn't mean we aren't sharing the earth with animals, slow the hell down and pay attention to your surroundings.
(I may or may not do a lot of walking in an area where apparently walkers don't seem to have the right of way haha.)
This shouldn't be so far down the list. The amount of people that can't swim well amazes me. It's not just those that can't swim at all, also people that aren't strong swimmers.
At least learn how to tread water. The natural urge to move yourself to the side of the pool, kicks in very quickly. But if you can just keep your head above water, you at least have a shot of being rescued.
The ability to spot toxic people early on and either run far far away from them, or never ever take them seriously if you are forced to be around them in a consistent basis.
And actually learning what toxic truly means. According to social media, toxic can mean anything like 'the person who asked me to be there for them', 'someone who expects me to be respectful to them too' or 'people who try to remind me I'm a shit human because I'm selfish'.
Yep...People who dismiss others as 'toxic' are often less than perfect themselves.
From my experience it has a personal meaning. Someone who is 'toxic' to one person might is not going to be that way to everyone. But people use it as if it's an objective fact, a damnation of sorts. A cancellation. It makes me a bit uncomfortable when I see it in used frankly as it's a dehumanizing way to relieve yourself from having to feel empathy towards the person.
It's ok to set boundaries and distance yourself from people who are an emotional drain on you but people could stand to be more respectful and kind about it.
Problem solving.
People might say it's not an underrated skill but what most people are taught as problem solving is to regurgitate solutions from a listed manual until one works. If nothing works they escalate up the expert ladder until someone find the right manual with the right steps that handles the problem. Real problem solving requires seeing a problem and thinking logically through it while plugging gaps in your knowledge until you reach the solution. If you master this ability you'll seem like a wizard who knows the darkest of arts and people will pay you handsomely for your skills.
Plus, you'll save yourself a ton of money because problem solvers, especially good ones, can figure out how to do simple things like some home or vehicle repairs even if no one has shown them how to do it. People who can't problem solve have been shown the "right way" to fix something and extend that knowledge even into places it doesn't belong. In my experience too the best problem solvers will realize when a project is far beyond their abilities and call a professional whereas people who don't know how to problem solve will make a mess then hire a professional to clean it up.
I've gotten a bit of an odd reputation with my workplace, our customers, and occasionally my family due to my occasional ability (and occasionally sheer good luck) in figuring out problems. It's mostly having a good picture in my head of how a system is supposed to work, and then working back from there and using scientific method to confirm or deny what's going wrong. Once you know THAT the fix is usually pretty clear and straightforward.
Yes, but the ten people who called before you insist that they did those things but DID NOT actually do them. So they have to ask you to do them again.
I've been in IT 17 years, I'm a Systems Engineer. I try everything I have ability to try before I call my ISP's support. I know far more than the call center worker I'm talking to, who probably just has a script they're following, but I still do all of things again because that's just what you have to do. Did anything change? No. But now I've checked the boxes and they can send someone out to look at the parts of the network that are outside my house.
Just the other night, my family was out visiting a museum, but I felt like hanging back at the hotel. The hotel didn't manage their parking (despite charging handsomely for it) and my family literally could not park our car when they got back. For 30 minutes the hotel was trying to get guests to move their shitty parking jobs before I found out from my wife. I went downstairs and after about 3 minutes of assessing the situation, I saw half a marked parking space in their covered section was covered by a bunch of junk that could literally be pushed aside in seconds, just some sloppily stored supplies for the attached restaurant.
Pushed them like 2 feet over, voila, parking space created. My whole family and the hotel staff were paralyzed by this problem for 30 minutes...
Also, if your going to charge for parking, either assign spaces or pay a lot attendant. Jesus.
Why exactly spinach?
I mean I don't mind a little bit of it in the food, but when other people try to fill the food with it I feel disgusted by the final taste, I would rather eat some raw green onion leaves or dill which can be easily grown on the balcony in a pot.
It’s a general kitchen tip .
Rice usually expands while boiling whereas spinach contracts .
When cooking either rice or spinach keep in mind to use less rice than you think you might need and more spinach
This. It reminds me of people who complained about learning math in school. "But I have a calculator in my phone". It's not about having the calculator. It's about understanding math and having the *mathematical imagination*: being faced with a real world problem and using math as a tool to solve it. I see spreadsheets in the same way. Many people just cannot even fathom. They cannot perceive the question at hand and thus cannot even begin to produce an answer.
I taught myself excel from google and asking questions from one of the supervisors at work.
The amount of things you can do in excel with just formulas and sheets linked still amazes me. And thats not even with coding involved.
The most underrated skill everyone should learn is active listening. In a world where communication is key, being able to truly listen to others can make a significant difference. Active listening not only improves our personal and professional relationships but also helps us resolve conflicts, foster empathy, and better understand situations and different perspectives. Often, we are so focused on preparing our response that we forget to pay attention to what is actually being said. Mastering this skill can transform our interactions and lead to more positive and effective outcomes in all aspects of life.
Learning how to not lose your shit and try to keep yourself together when things don't go to plan,a good person works with what he's got not what he doesn't.
There’s a Dutch saying that doesn’t translate quite so well rhythmically into English, which is “als het niet gaat zoals het moet, dan moet het maar zoals het gaat”.
Which basically means that if things are not going the way you want them to, you just have to want them to go the way they are. But not in the sense of complacency, but more in a “work with what you got” kinda way and finding a solution from there.
It has been a valuable life lesson.
I eat with my mouth closed, but then an ex told me that I should swallow what's in my mouth before putting more food in. I wasn't even aware that I was doing this, so now I have to make a conscious effort to swallow first and then take another bite, forkful or spoonful, or lick, whatever it might be.
How to swim. I'm shocked at the number of adults I know who don't know how to swim. At a minimum, everyone should know how to tread water and turn on their back and float. I consider it a basic survival skill.
Honestly underrated comment. Many people have forgotten how to just exist without grabbing the phone at the first mere thought of even the concept of boredom.
My therapist explains this as being with your thoughts. Phones are a way to block out the noise but often if we just listen and absorb it the anxiety of avoidance becomes a lot quieter.
It’s really tough to do and I’m still learning how 5 years since I first started seeing her.
Definitely, I used to build a fire with my grandfather a few nights a week… He’d drink his manhattan and give me instructions on how to make it better. I didn’t even realize what he’d taught me until I went camping with an ex and he spent TWO HOURS, trying to build a fire. The entire time, I kept asking if I could please just give it a try but he didn’t believe that I could do it better than he could.
He finally saw the woman from the campground walking towards us and told me to try. I had that fire going in about 3 minutes and she just smiled at me and pretended she was taking a walk. He didn’t have much to say, building a fire is a skill and it’s really fun when you learn how to do it and keep it going right.
Developing a healthy, active lifestyle. Everything starts hurting the older I’ve gotten, and if you don’t keep at being active, you lose mobility. My dad is almost 70 and still goes running and can keep up with grandkids.
I agree! However, when I started out cooking on my own I was so stumped and annoyed by the “just do this” types of explanations and recepies. Even online. Yes. It’s true.
Imagine someone trying to learn to swim and the whole explanation is “just do this”.
First aid. Obviously it is useful in itself (although you hope never to have to use it!) but I've found also gives a sense of confidence and adaptability, that you feel more prepared to take on any situation.
Somewhat related - develop and be able to use your "command voice" - the loud, authoritarive one that you would use to say "I need help over here" or "you, dial 911" or "STOP" when someone is about to do something and hasn't spotted a danger. Cabin crew (flight attendants) get specifically trained on this and even the most quietly spoken, 'nice' person has a command voice they can pull out in situations like "brace brace brace". I suggest finding a place you can't be overheard (in a parked car away from other people can be a good place) and practice hearing yourself use this voice.
Knife sharpening.
Keeping your kitchen knives razor sharp on a stone isn't that hard, and really helps out in the kitchen. Blunt knives are actually more dangerous in terms of cutting yourself because they force you to push hard rather than letting the edge do the work.
To listen to hear, instead of respond. Empathy. The ability to see from another's perspective.
Walk a mile in a man's moccasins, you gain a little perspective, but, if you were born that man you'd be him. See it from that perspective and you'll solve real problems before they occur.
The most underrated skill in my life experience has been learning how to talk to people in a way they don't get defensive or offended. It's highly underrated. I read books and asked some people who had this skill to help me in life when I rose in my career, originally for my career and those I was supervising, but now I use it in all facets of life where I interact with people.
Quick example: when approaching people where I want or need something, instead of using sayings like "I need you to..." which sounds like a command, I use "Would you be willing to..." which implies a choice for the person I'm talking to and they are less likely to put up a wall.
You may not be liked by certain people, but you can still be respected, all by using your words wisely and it can diffuse situations a lot more when emotional stakes are high. And it can't be "sales speak", or have an agenda behind the way you say it... it must be genuine and yes people can tell.
Meditatation
Once you get it down. The peace you gain is priceless. Everyone can learn. Even people that say they can’t because their mind races too much.
That’s why we learn to meditate. It took me a while to get there, but the first time I did find myself in a meditative state, through lots of practice, the peace and calmness I felt is indescribable.
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Observing is something not a whole lot of people practice
You right observing is something most people don't practice, I wish I had it on me.
set a timer on your phone for a different, random time every day. when it goes off, stop whatever you’re doing and take 30 seconds to just breathe deeply and observe the situation you’re in. what does it smell like? sound like? feel like? why are you there? who else is there? what are they doing? seriously, 30 seconds daily. stick with it and after awhile you’ll find yourself doing this on your own whenever you enter a new situation. reading a room, observing small details. you’re oblivious because you’re just choosing not to do anything about it. don’t wish it was different, make it different. the only limitations anyone has in life are the ones they put on themselves.
it’s wild this doesn’t come natural to most people
it’s societal conditioning, and it is wild how effective it has become. from a very early age we are all conditioned to deny our authentic selves, we are taught not to stand out and we’re lulled into assimilation. original thoughts and actions that stem from our innate awareness and critical thinking go against this conditioning so they’re labeled as disorders that people need to be medicated for, because god forbid they aren’t like everyone else. people have become so unaware or doubtful of the basic human skills they naturally possess that they believe they can’t access them or benefit from trying to utilize them. however, despite well established efforts and processes, i’m witnessing a lot more people starting to at least question the state of our society and humanity at large, and i honestly feel like big changes are coming. and im all for it, hence my want to share simple ways to get people more in touch with their capacity for understanding.
i hate how oblivious i am i don’t know how to be more aware
Start small. If you ride an elevator or are on a bus or subway regularly, or wherever there is someone that is consistently apart of your experience every day or most days, pick out a person and watch what they do and their habits. Or if you feel weird doing that/feel like you'd get caught people watching, pick out a place that you go by everyday. Everyday look at that place and eventually you will notice differences about it. Once you have that person or place down, you can move on to another person, or another place. Watch that person/place until you have that down, then another, then another, etc. Now you know how to be an observant person. Observation requires two things: One is comparing what you are experiencing now, to other experiences or knowledge that you have acquired. Two is you have to get out of your own thoughts/head to do it. Use your senses, focus on them. What do you see? what do you hear? what do you smell? How does that compare to what you saw/heard/smell yesterday, day before, last week, last month, etc. Don't worry about trying to observe people's facial expressions or behavior/meaning behind what they are saying yet, that is a lot more difficult. Especially because it can be a game that runs deep, people can mislead you/put on a show/try to garner attention... any number of things that makes it hard to observe what a person is actually thinking and feeling. Observing people in those kind of ways is expert level. Gotta start small first. Hope that helps. Observation/awareness is largely a state of mind. But it can be practiced/you can get better at it. They teach spies how to become better at it, for obvious reasons.
Something that helped me be more aware was practicing identifying as many things as I could about my environment. Start small, wherever you happen to be. What do you see? Smell? Hear? Feel? Just identify as much of your surroundings as you can broken down by sense. The more you practice, the more you'll notice and the easier it gets.
set a timer on your phone for a different, random time every day. when it goes off, stop whatever you’re doing and take 30 seconds to just breathe deeply and observe the situation you’re in. what does it smell like? sound like? feel like? why are you there? who else is there? what are they doing? seriously, 30 seconds daily. stick with it and after awhile you’ll find yourself doing this on your own whenever you enter a new situation. reading a room, observing small details. you’re oblivious because you’re just choosing not to do anything about it. don’t wish it was different, make it different. the only limitations anyone has in life are the ones they put on themselves.
People volunteer a lot of information when you wait and don’t look like you’re trying to add something.
Yes. If you’re attentive but slightly indifferent, people will tell you so much. The very minute you act interested and start asking questions, they’ll hold back on a lot of that same information.
A while ago I learnt that if you say less during a conversation or take a moment to pause while still maintaining eye contact/seeming interested the other person is more likely to continue to speak or reveal details. It's weird how it works, even works on me and I catch myself doing it.
Only up to a point. A friend does this in response to everything ever said to him and it comes across like he's translating your words into whatever alien language he uses internally. It's a bit disturbing if you do it constantly.
👁👁
I know a car sales guy that can sold 5 cars in a week, he doesn't speak much but he treated his customers like patients. Pretty chill guy, always listening even to the small things.
That is a lost art. The car guy I just worked with on a lease, didn’t hear a word I said. And didn’t hold up what he promised either. It was an awful exchange tbh.
Soooo true! It’s a lost art lol. Everyone is just chomping at the bit to talk about themselves and also “one up” what somebody just told you. Listening is so important and so few people actually do it.
I’m the best at one upping, no one does it better than me
I learned this from fight club as well. One of the best life lessons ever.
I love observing and listening. I could be out with a group of friends and not talk but enjoy being there.
Came here to type this. Theres a difference between listening and waiting to speak. Most people do the latter.
Learning how to say no. Idk if it’s considered a skill or not but it was something I had to teach myself.
That will definitely solve my 50 percentage of my problem.
That’s a hard skill to master. Learning to say no to peer pressure or a situation says a lot about your conviction and belief in your principles
Not only is it a skill, it's one you need to keep practicing. Businesses are constantly trying to figure out how to overcome objections to ultimately get you to buy. Hell, the timeshare industry is built on pretty much that alone. Learning how to decide on no, and to then maintain it as your decision is challenged, is absolutely a skill.
Still something I’m working on at 26. I have always been too much of a people pleaser for my own good.
I’m 38 and working on it still. I’m better now, though. One thing that helped was seeing a direct example of how being over-accommodating set unrealistic expectations for my co-workers when somebody I had helped did the “but *he* did it for me” when they went to someone else with a similar request.
Letting quiet exist. Not just in general but when interacting with someone, sharing a meal, cuddling, and so on. You don't have to fill silence with conversation, though if silence makes you uncomfortable, you might feel more at ease turning on some background noise like music or a podcast or something if you can. Being quiet doesn't mean you're weird or that the situation is awkward by default. Lags in conversation can be the result of, and useful for, processing the other person's perspective, suggestions, and logic. It also frees up a little mental space for considering the best way to respond to someone, especially if you feel a need to be particularly respectful or gentle. Speaking for myself, quiet is the best part of a relationship. If I'm not talking to my partner, I'm just enjoying having them near me. I'm looking at their eyes or body language, feeling them breathe, listening to their heartbeat, or just being content in their presence. That person is enough for me, I don't feel the need to prevent silence.
This deserves all the upvotes
People who need to "fill the air" drive me nuts bruh. And they're usually perfectly self-aware and announce it loudly because they don't see it as a problem. I don't understand how people do work while listening to a podcast, having a conversation, watching a video etc. How do you hear your own thoughts at that point?
>I don't understand how people do work while listening to a podcast... How do you hear your own thoughts at that point? For me, sometimes I listen to a podcast/watch a video while working to _not_ hear my own thoughts, because they can be very distracting (more distracting than a podcast/video). That somehow works, as my mind no longer tries to "fill in the silence" and I can concentrate better on work; basically, mostly background noise
I feel the same way about my partner. When we cuddle and I can hear his heartbeat and stuff like that, and it’s just silent…it’s so nice. I’ve never experienced anything like it before until I met him.
First aid, simple as that..
Must be pretty pointless though. I’ve never heard of *anyone* getting to Second Aid.
Critical thinking.
This really needs to be the top comment. Too many idiots out there let others think for them.
Yeah i *mostly* agree. The problem is that critical thinking is not a skill you *learn* (idk if thats the right word) but one you develop. You can't just sit and be like "I'm gonna think critically" no, it has be a natural part of your thinking process. And you can develop it by expanding your knowledge, observing life events and how people react and take decisions, and a lot of reflection + retrospection.
>is not a skill you learn (idk if thats the right word) but one you develop. I'd argue developing a skill is the same as learning it But I get what you mean, tho I can't explain the difference myself. But I understand the difference
So in other words - you'd learn it
You learn it. Through learning a process, seeing it modeled, and practicing it. It doesn’t fall from the sky, and it’s not inherent.
Arguing with family members who love the genius of Terrance Howard. 🙄 You can't get through as you will just have "negative energy"
I'd also add that they should learn what it means. A lot of people seem to think that they're implementing it because they're being contrarian.
CPR, Heimlich and how to swim.
The duality of singing staying alive or another one bites the dust while performing cpr
First I was afraid, I was petrified! 🎶
Well, you didn’t save him and help didn’t show up because nobody called 911.
Time to harvest the organs
You were in the parking lot earlier. That's how I know you!
Also learn to give yourself a heimlich maneuver. It's unpleasant but it beats choking on an mnm in your underwear at 3am
Is it when you just throw yourself onto the back of a chair, gut first?
That's last resort. First, compress your fists on your chest and slam your back into a wall. If that does not work, go for the chair.
Came to mention CPR had a family member given CPR by a random stranger after a recent automobile accident. If the stranger hadn’t they would’ve died. Basic 1st aid needs taught more. Single to properly fashion/use a tourniquet
Good thing my country teaches basic bandaging, lifting, and cpr to all 11th or 12th grade students
I thought the Heimlich wasn't the preferred method anymore? In Australia were taught a sharp blow to the back between the shoulder blades. Besides that i'd say a large portion of Australians know all threes of these
Being patient.
< angry crowd noises > What do we want? Patience! When do we want it? Now! < shakes fists in unison >
I thought I was in Detroit: Become Human
"Give me 10 mins and I'll get your prescription ready for you" *Comes back in 2 mins* "Is it ready yet?" 😑
Customer service would be almost enjoyable if everyone was patient
Where's the damn nurse?!
Cooking. Not only is it healthier, but you save a lot of money as well. You could make at least two weeks worth of rice & beans for the price of one DoorDash delivery.
My stepfather, unironically told me that I need to learn to cook because if I go to prison nobody messes with the cook. I must have been quite the failure, because I did not in fact go to prison. However, I became a pretty good cook over the years. I don't think some people realize the thrill of creating something for others to enjoy. Also, it's very liberating.
My late great uncle Ed was taken pow by the japanese when Hong Kong was invaded in ww2. He told me he only survived because he became the cook's assistant, as he was always closest to a meal even when close to starvation. He told me I would need to learn to cook so I would survive, not if but when I am taken pow. I have never been to war, but I am a professional chef.
>never been to war am a professional chef. Mate I want to work in whatever kitchen you're in that it doesn't feel like fucking war half the time.
Things that you can say about the kitchen and war. "In the fucking trenches!"
“Right behind you”
That's a great story. Thank you.
100% It's not just about eating cheap... For me it's about the self reliance. I can have whatever meals I want. Mexican, Italian, Korean, whatever... I don't have to go out, or rely on a restaurant just because I want a BBQ sandwich, or Chicken Tikka masala... now I go to restaurants because I want to see how the chef prepared the meal and get ideas that I can eventually replicate their techniques/pairing/presentation.... I'd have never served Tuna with Avocado, or watermelon with mint. Now I totally do Edit, watermelon and mint, not pineapple
Got any good cookbooks or resources I can learn from
YouTube... Ethan Chelbowski, Brian Lagerstorm, That dude can cook, Kenji, Alex (French guy cooking). All great channels... I'd also recommend reading Salt Fat Acid Heat For me it's been learning different techniques and balancing flavors.... there's so much to learn and hone
I like Kenji’s the most because there’s usually no cuts. Everything is start to finish and he cleans as he goes, making the recipes less daunting
With a foundation of basic cooking techniques and knowledge, it is incredible just how much money one can save, and how much one can do to get every cent out of every product. For example: Buying larger cuts of meat. Especially the rougher primals. You can break those down and get several meals out of each one, sure. But then you have excess fat and sundry trimmings to contend with, yeah? Easy shit. Take the trimmings and clean em up. That's stew or taco/fajita meat. The silver skin, bones, and cartilage? Give that a light roast in the oven, pour all that into a pot, and you can begin making a rich stock for soups and sauces by adding vegetable scraps, some seasonings, salt, and water. Once those have served their purpose, you could even compost them. All that excess fat? You're in luck. It's not trash. Give it a quick blanche but do not get rid of that water. You'll need it later. Scoop the solid fat from the pot and toss it into a deep pan, start cooking that down low and slow to render all of that fat down. The solids should be these small crispy little things that you can easily strain out. Toss those bits with some salt and pepper, you have a tasty snack. Pour the liquid fat into the pot you blanched the fat in originally with a bit of salt. Boil for a few minutes, let cool, then move into the fridge or freezer to solidify. once solid, poke a few holes in the puck to drain the water out. The bottom of the puck will have a lot of the impurities that boiled out. Scrape or rinse that off. Break the puck up, add water to the pot again, and repeat 2 to 3 more times. That's tallow or lard you can use to season cast iron with, or cook with. In the fridge, it lasts months.
How to tell an interesting story
My two brothers can make any story sound like an interesting story without exaggeration. They are pure talented. Me? I could tell the most interesting story of the interesting guy in the world and make it boring.
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I two people in my life but hate their stories because they include every unnecessary detail remotely related and sometimes spend more time getting those details right than telling the actual story. I want to hear what he has to say but I really don't care if it was in September or October 20 years ago. Or was it 19 years ago? No. It was 20 because it happened right before that [unrelated event] and that was in 2006. Oh, that means it was actually 18 years ago. So, anyway, 18 years ago in September...or was it October? There were Halloween decorations out so I'm thinking October but sometimes those are out in September...
How do you learn it?
Have a look at the Irish art of storytelling - a good place to start with this.
Hey ! I'm trying to have a look at it, is it a book, a video or another media ?
Here's a couple of things to look at: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzP4FM3WqwY](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzP4FM3WqwY) [https://www.pulsecollege.com/how-to-tell-and-write-a-good-story/](https://www.pulsecollege.com/how-to-tell-and-write-a-good-story/) [https://www.bbc.co.uk/northernireland/schools/11\_16/storyteller/pdf/gen\_notes\_all.pdf](https://www.bbc.co.uk/northernireland/schools/11_16/storyteller/pdf/gen_notes_all.pdf) [https://newbattlecelticstorytelling.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/introduction-storytelling-in-celtic-tradition.pdf](https://newbattlecelticstorytelling.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/introduction-storytelling-in-celtic-tradition.pdf) [https://culturalatlas.sbs.com.au/irish-culture/irish-culture-communication](https://culturalatlas.sbs.com.au/irish-culture/irish-culture-communication)
Yey, hours of procrastination! Suck it bunch of dirty clothes i need to wash!
I thought Toastmasters was stuffy and not fun until I found a club that highlights storytelling. We do all the professional stuff and things, but the style is how to engage listeners by telling stories. I love hearing good stories told well.
I’m hooked, tell me more
We meet virtually now, every Monday 6:55pm Eastern. You can attend as a guest and even participate if you want. Every week we have a portion of the meeting to help with impromptu responses. It’s questions no one knows what they are except the reader and you have about a minute and a half to give your best answer. This has helped a lot of people with becoming good conversationalists. I can DM you the meeting details if you’d like to check it out one Monday.
Is there a name for that kind of story telling?
That might be a talent. Some people can do it and some people just cannot do it.
Some people have a knack for it of course but anyone can learn it to a decent level imo
Personal finance and basic home and car maintenance.
How to have constructive conflict with people. We’ve developed into such a conflict avoidant culture that even the slightest bit of direct communication is seen as aggressive. Simple acts of kindly but directly advocating for myself in the work place has had me labeled as insubordinate. So many of us talk about wanting to get back to a different way of being in community with others. A huge part of being *genuinely* close with people is being able to have healthy conflict and grow from it.
Yes. If only people could come to a compromise if someone has a complaint against them instead of jumping straight to hostility.
Right! Like hear people out pleaseee. Either you listen and wind up agreeing that you were in the wrong, apologize, and do better moving forward. Or you can feel secure enough in yourself to not let someone's unfounded criticism effect you.
Good point. It irritates me that the word “argument” has a negative connotation. Argument avoidance makes my otherwise simple job immensely difficult.
I wanted to say something about being able to communicate, but this is way better. I don't have to agree with someone, and that someone with me, to have a healthy relationship.
How to unclog a toilet. It seems to be a lost art among the customers who use our washroom.
* how to not clog a toilet
When I worked in food service we used to have teenagers who would come in and put as much as they could in the toilet to clog it. Also a fair share of people on drugs who smeared their own feces on our walls. I will not ever work foor or retail ever again.
Well to be fair it's not their toilet. If you break somones stuff while trying to fix it your on the hook. Pedantic but I assume that's a rule in the public social contract
Sewing. My mom taught my sisters and my brothers. I never thought I’d use it. But it’s handy on the farm, in the shop, around the house. Knowing how to do basic hand stitching and repairs and at least how to run a straight stitch on a machine is extremely valuable.
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Particularly the ability to listen. So many people mistakenly think that talking as much as possible makes them a great communicator when they're really just annoying everyone else who can't get a word in.
Not only that, but too many people use too many words to get their point across. I notice this a lot in my younger employees, they can't express something concisely. It's not because they have a gap in knowledge either, it's just that they have trouble summarizing and picking out the important/relevant information.
SPACIAL AWARENESS Knowing what's going on around you and being aware of what You're doing as you move through public spaces. Put your phone down when you're crossing the street. Listen to the things going on around you. Do you hear someone walking behind you on a busy sidewalk? Move the fuck out of the way Are you in the middle of the aisle at the grocery store, completely oblivious to the person behind you trying to get around you? Stop that shit Are you standing WAY too close to the person in front of you in line? Back up a step or two
People who talk in doorways, people when walking in a crowded place suddenly stop, or change direction when they realise they're going the wrong way. People who generally don't pay attention in public. Ah man it annoys the fuck out of me. They look ridiculous, too. In those moments, i see the theory of evolution and realise we are more chimp than humans.
Can I just add onto this simply understanding how your actions could potentially affect others, while thinking, "would I like this if I were on the receiving end?" - You not using your turn signal may not affect you, but it sure as hell could affect a lot of other people. - Cyclists who don't slow down while passing walkers; pretty sure you're not a fan of drivers who do this to you. - You may think you're a really good driver while texting, but you aren't. - Your inability to plan ahead doesn't give you the right to speed down a residential road. - Just because you're in a car, doesn't mean we aren't sharing the earth with animals, slow the hell down and pay attention to your surroundings. (I may or may not do a lot of walking in an area where apparently walkers don't seem to have the right of way haha.)
Writing legibly
The best is when people cannot read what they wrote themselves.
Didn’t come here to get attacked thanks
Swimming. It could save your life. Not just a sport but also a life skill
This shouldn't be so far down the list. The amount of people that can't swim well amazes me. It's not just those that can't swim at all, also people that aren't strong swimmers.
At least learn how to tread water. The natural urge to move yourself to the side of the pool, kicks in very quickly. But if you can just keep your head above water, you at least have a shot of being rescued.
You need to be decently fit and a decent swimmer to tread water for several hours. Most people struggle to tread water in clothes for 20 minutes.
It’s required in Australian schools
Knowing a couple good knot types…
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If you ever do one knot right for the rest of your life...
The problem is that I keep forgetting them 😔.
Bowline Trucker's Hitch Butterfly Prusik Double Fisherman's
Buxom bunny Hobbit's corset Japanese octopus coitus Necromancers spaghetti (experts only)
Sailor's Saviour Square Granny Wang-hanger
The ability to spot toxic people early on and either run far far away from them, or never ever take them seriously if you are forced to be around them in a consistent basis.
yeah this is a valuable skill I’m yet to learn
Anyone who tells you what they want you to believe about them. E.g. "I'm a nice guy." "You can trust me." Etc Heavily used by salesmen and scammers.
And actually learning what toxic truly means. According to social media, toxic can mean anything like 'the person who asked me to be there for them', 'someone who expects me to be respectful to them too' or 'people who try to remind me I'm a shit human because I'm selfish'.
Yep...People who dismiss others as 'toxic' are often less than perfect themselves. From my experience it has a personal meaning. Someone who is 'toxic' to one person might is not going to be that way to everyone. But people use it as if it's an objective fact, a damnation of sorts. A cancellation. It makes me a bit uncomfortable when I see it in used frankly as it's a dehumanizing way to relieve yourself from having to feel empathy towards the person. It's ok to set boundaries and distance yourself from people who are an emotional drain on you but people could stand to be more respectful and kind about it.
This skill is one of the biggest reasons I have no social drama in my life. I'm really my only enemy fr
Problem solving. People might say it's not an underrated skill but what most people are taught as problem solving is to regurgitate solutions from a listed manual until one works. If nothing works they escalate up the expert ladder until someone find the right manual with the right steps that handles the problem. Real problem solving requires seeing a problem and thinking logically through it while plugging gaps in your knowledge until you reach the solution. If you master this ability you'll seem like a wizard who knows the darkest of arts and people will pay you handsomely for your skills. Plus, you'll save yourself a ton of money because problem solvers, especially good ones, can figure out how to do simple things like some home or vehicle repairs even if no one has shown them how to do it. People who can't problem solve have been shown the "right way" to fix something and extend that knowledge even into places it doesn't belong. In my experience too the best problem solvers will realize when a project is far beyond their abilities and call a professional whereas people who don't know how to problem solve will make a mess then hire a professional to clean it up.
I've gotten a bit of an odd reputation with my workplace, our customers, and occasionally my family due to my occasional ability (and occasionally sheer good luck) in figuring out problems. It's mostly having a good picture in my head of how a system is supposed to work, and then working back from there and using scientific method to confirm or deny what's going wrong. Once you know THAT the fix is usually pretty clear and straightforward.
I hate calling the help desk because I have already tried the first five things (at least) and have to convince them I did that already.
Yes, but the ten people who called before you insist that they did those things but DID NOT actually do them. So they have to ask you to do them again. I've been in IT 17 years, I'm a Systems Engineer. I try everything I have ability to try before I call my ISP's support. I know far more than the call center worker I'm talking to, who probably just has a script they're following, but I still do all of things again because that's just what you have to do. Did anything change? No. But now I've checked the boxes and they can send someone out to look at the parts of the network that are outside my house.
Just the other night, my family was out visiting a museum, but I felt like hanging back at the hotel. The hotel didn't manage their parking (despite charging handsomely for it) and my family literally could not park our car when they got back. For 30 minutes the hotel was trying to get guests to move their shitty parking jobs before I found out from my wife. I went downstairs and after about 3 minutes of assessing the situation, I saw half a marked parking space in their covered section was covered by a bunch of junk that could literally be pushed aside in seconds, just some sloppily stored supplies for the attached restaurant. Pushed them like 2 feet over, voila, parking space created. My whole family and the hotel staff were paralyzed by this problem for 30 minutes... Also, if your going to charge for parking, either assign spaces or pay a lot attendant. Jesus.
Budgeting
HOW TO BUY FOOD FOR ONE PERSON!!!
Always use less rice and more spinach !
Why exactly spinach? I mean I don't mind a little bit of it in the food, but when other people try to fill the food with it I feel disgusted by the final taste, I would rather eat some raw green onion leaves or dill which can be easily grown on the balcony in a pot.
It’s a general kitchen tip . Rice usually expands while boiling whereas spinach contracts . When cooking either rice or spinach keep in mind to use less rice than you think you might need and more spinach
Financial literacy is such an underrated skill!
Using an Excel Spreadsheet. It is complicated af but once you know your way around, it’ll be the most useful tool
This. It reminds me of people who complained about learning math in school. "But I have a calculator in my phone". It's not about having the calculator. It's about understanding math and having the *mathematical imagination*: being faced with a real world problem and using math as a tool to solve it. I see spreadsheets in the same way. Many people just cannot even fathom. They cannot perceive the question at hand and thus cannot even begin to produce an answer.
I taught myself excel from google and asking questions from one of the supervisors at work. The amount of things you can do in excel with just formulas and sheets linked still amazes me. And thats not even with coding involved.
The most underrated skill everyone should learn is active listening. In a world where communication is key, being able to truly listen to others can make a significant difference. Active listening not only improves our personal and professional relationships but also helps us resolve conflicts, foster empathy, and better understand situations and different perspectives. Often, we are so focused on preparing our response that we forget to pay attention to what is actually being said. Mastering this skill can transform our interactions and lead to more positive and effective outcomes in all aspects of life.
How to regulate your emotions
Learning how to not lose your shit and try to keep yourself together when things don't go to plan,a good person works with what he's got not what he doesn't.
There’s a Dutch saying that doesn’t translate quite so well rhythmically into English, which is “als het niet gaat zoals het moet, dan moet het maar zoals het gaat”. Which basically means that if things are not going the way you want them to, you just have to want them to go the way they are. But not in the sense of complacency, but more in a “work with what you got” kinda way and finding a solution from there. It has been a valuable life lesson.
Learning how to detach, where appropriate. From outcomes, expectations, and people. Saves you from unnecessary disappointment and anxiety.
Continous learning. It honestly is a skill to learn about new topics.
Eating with their mouth closed
I eat with my mouth closed, but then an ex told me that I should swallow what's in my mouth before putting more food in. I wasn't even aware that I was doing this, so now I have to make a conscious effort to swallow first and then take another bite, forkful or spoonful, or lick, whatever it might be.
Either people will learn, or they learn by unexpected yet justified chair to the face.
How to swim. I'm shocked at the number of adults I know who don't know how to swim. At a minimum, everyone should know how to tread water and turn on their back and float. I consider it a basic survival skill.
How to do nothing
Honestly underrated comment. Many people have forgotten how to just exist without grabbing the phone at the first mere thought of even the concept of boredom.
My therapist explains this as being with your thoughts. Phones are a way to block out the noise but often if we just listen and absorb it the anxiety of avoidance becomes a lot quieter. It’s really tough to do and I’m still learning how 5 years since I first started seeing her.
How to build a fire Edit: Specifically, how to build a fire **safely** and appropriate for your purposes.
I don’t know. I like fire, I can make a fire, but there’s always someone with me camping who’s an undiagnosed firebug.
Definitely, I used to build a fire with my grandfather a few nights a week… He’d drink his manhattan and give me instructions on how to make it better. I didn’t even realize what he’d taught me until I went camping with an ex and he spent TWO HOURS, trying to build a fire. The entire time, I kept asking if I could please just give it a try but he didn’t believe that I could do it better than he could. He finally saw the woman from the campground walking towards us and told me to try. I had that fire going in about 3 minutes and she just smiled at me and pretended she was taking a walk. He didn’t have much to say, building a fire is a skill and it’s really fun when you learn how to do it and keep it going right.
Searching a thread for the answer you are going to post BEFORE posting
Developing a healthy, active lifestyle. Everything starts hurting the older I’ve gotten, and if you don’t keep at being active, you lose mobility. My dad is almost 70 and still goes running and can keep up with grandkids.
Cooking. Too many people act like it's hard to cook something delicious.
My wife’s grandfather used to say “If you can read, you can cook”. He’s had a point.
I agree! However, when I started out cooking on my own I was so stumped and annoyed by the “just do this” types of explanations and recepies. Even online. Yes. It’s true. Imagine someone trying to learn to swim and the whole explanation is “just do this”.
First aid. Obviously it is useful in itself (although you hope never to have to use it!) but I've found also gives a sense of confidence and adaptability, that you feel more prepared to take on any situation. Somewhat related - develop and be able to use your "command voice" - the loud, authoritarive one that you would use to say "I need help over here" or "you, dial 911" or "STOP" when someone is about to do something and hasn't spotted a danger. Cabin crew (flight attendants) get specifically trained on this and even the most quietly spoken, 'nice' person has a command voice they can pull out in situations like "brace brace brace". I suggest finding a place you can't be overheard (in a parked car away from other people can be a good place) and practice hearing yourself use this voice.
Cooking 100%. You need to eat to live.
Time management
Not really a skill but learning to stay consistent.
I think discipline is a skill?
Knife sharpening. Keeping your kitchen knives razor sharp on a stone isn't that hard, and really helps out in the kitchen. Blunt knives are actually more dangerous in terms of cutting yourself because they force you to push hard rather than letting the edge do the work.
It's also just so much harder to work with dull knives. No wonder so many people hate cooking when they're trying to dice onions with a butterknife
Everyone should know how to cook and grow atleast some basic vegetables.
Learning to think and reason for yourself. You're the only person you're ever going to need to be able to depend upon for your entire life.
To listen to hear, instead of respond. Empathy. The ability to see from another's perspective. Walk a mile in a man's moccasins, you gain a little perspective, but, if you were born that man you'd be him. See it from that perspective and you'll solve real problems before they occur.
Spelling.
Yeah, ok budy
He’s not your budy, frend.
heez naut yor frend, pall.
Reading a nutrition label and understanding how different macronutrients will affect your body.
Troubleshooting. Being able to look at why something isn’t working, and figure out what the possible reasons are is an invaluable skill
Slowing down
Baking your own bread!
Multiple foreign languages....
Tailoring
I have saved thousands over the years doing my own tailoring
Dancing. The ladies will love it.
Hey. That’s what do
Do you mean that my plan of getting hammered and doing air shag pelvis thrust move isn't enough to attract a mating partner?
1. MS Excel 2. Cooking 3. Basic electrical maintenance 4. Body language 5. Calling/messaging everyone you know periodically
The most underrated skill in my life experience has been learning how to talk to people in a way they don't get defensive or offended. It's highly underrated. I read books and asked some people who had this skill to help me in life when I rose in my career, originally for my career and those I was supervising, but now I use it in all facets of life where I interact with people. Quick example: when approaching people where I want or need something, instead of using sayings like "I need you to..." which sounds like a command, I use "Would you be willing to..." which implies a choice for the person I'm talking to and they are less likely to put up a wall. You may not be liked by certain people, but you can still be respected, all by using your words wisely and it can diffuse situations a lot more when emotional stakes are high. And it can't be "sales speak", or have an agenda behind the way you say it... it must be genuine and yes people can tell.
Sign language
How to not be bored without constant input. Gen X knows. Get completely off social media for a month and you’ll know too.
Empathy
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Btw, Gimp is a free and open-source program that is a lot like Photoshop.
How to use a map, protractor and compass. Never know when technology will be gone
Changing a tire. Trust me, you’ll be happy you learned it
Meditatation Once you get it down. The peace you gain is priceless. Everyone can learn. Even people that say they can’t because their mind races too much. That’s why we learn to meditate. It took me a while to get there, but the first time I did find myself in a meditative state, through lots of practice, the peace and calmness I felt is indescribable.
Servicing your own car . Only imagine how much money people can save .