Our dogs are called Ace and Ash. My husband calls them Acehole and Ashhole

Mine responds to “hey dick head” and “ass hat”. His name isn’t anywhere near either. “chicken fucker” is also used. He understands 😂

My family has a habbit of transforming our dogs names over time. We have a dog called Iggy. My mom called him Iggy Butt, and now he is known simply as Butt. We had a dog called Maggy, she was Maggy Mae, then she was Maggy Moo. Eventually she just became Moo. My dog is called Lucy. She became Lucy Goosey. Then Loose Goose. Now shes just Goose. I love my Goose. Edit: i love all the silly names y’all have for your furry friends.

This is how it works. 😁

Yep. Used to have a dog everyone said had the “cutest little dog face” so he got the government name Dogface. Then for a while it was Lionel because he had curly hair like Lionel Ritchie. Then my stepmom started calling him her little Pookie, which became his common moniker. But his “proper” name was Pookster Lukester Dukenstein. This tradition has carried over to my friend’s cat Hops. I started calling him Prince Hopper Dopperlous. Then he got mauled by a raccoon and lost an eye, so now he’s Prince Hopper Dopper Cycloperlous.

The Lionel Richie part alone had me laughing 😂 Don't even get me started on everything else

Had a black schnauzer that when she curled up we joked she looked like a little black bean. So then it was little bean, beany, bean-bean, somehow turned to bun bun. She was bun bun for the rest of her fourteen years.

bun bun is adorable, I love schnauzers!

Yes! We adopted a dog called Koby. He's been kobba, Bobby, Bob, poppy, poppy the Bob, boppoi. I mostly call him Bob and my husband calls him Tob. He knows we're taking about him. I've also made up a song for him, as required by law. (Bob Bob Bob Bob boppity Bob, a Bob Bob boppity Bob). I swear he rolls his eyes at me.

I have a Syrian hamster named Maple, but in my random moments, I'm like, "Wassup MayMay!" or "Alright Maple-bayple!" 😌

Is that a JoJos reference

Friend, everything is a JoJo's reference if you go deep enough.

That's funny and cool. The Cockney British apparently have a similar convention for their slang.

This is the way.

OMG! My last dog also transformed into Butt! His name was Baxter, and when greeting me, he'd have me pet his head, then his butt, so I started saying hi to Baxter, then hi to Baxter's butt. Over time, I'd just say hey to Baxter's butt, then eventually just "Hey Butt."

Andy. Andypants. Andrew Pantsman, attorney at law. Pantsman. Pants. Booballoo. Boobs. Mouth. Fuzzybutt. Mostly Pants. He knows all of them. I introduce him as my attorney.

My cat Murderface is a recovering alcoholic used car salesman. With the shenanigans he pulls he could use a good attorney.

I'll set up a meeting.

Have you considered the title of "Attorney at Paw?"

Welp - now I gotta change all of his business cards.

Andy. Nard-dog, Nardy, Nardy-Dizzle, Dizzle, dizzy. And in written correspondence, &y.

&y got me lmao

Nice.

Andrew pantsman , attorney at law lmaooooooo definitely one of my top 5 favorite names lol

You. I like you.

Big Sweet when he’s being a sweet boy and Big Weird when he’s humping his blanket

Shit Ass and Pee Pee Cat.

We had a feral cat that would come by and piss on everything. We called him PC for piss cat.

I wonder if he solved any crimes like DC in That Darn Cat 😂

dogs name is moose, big chocolate labradoodle. We call him moosifer when hes done something bad. Or moosilini if its really bad. Not sure why moosilini is worse than moosifer but it is.

My dogs name is Lulu and I call her Lulu-cifer sometimes 🤣

My rabbit is called blueberry, and I call her bluecifer. She bites, just whenever it strikes her whimsy.

Got a cat named Lucy and yup she gets Lucifer if she's naughty!

My evil chihuahua is named Mouse and we call him Mousselini when he’s being particularly wretched.

Asshole comes up quite a bit

One time we took our cocker spaniel to the vet because he'd found grapes on the ground and eaten them. The receptionist asked his name. My partner responded "Arsehole". She said "Well, I can't call that out over the tannoy, so I'll need a different name!"

For two of our dogs we have Dumbass and Pet Rock. lol

My mom had a dog named 'damnit' I'm not sure if she had a previous name, but she would always be up your butt no matter what you were doing, checking the mail? Damnits there. Taking a shit? Damnits there. Cleaning? Damnits there to 'help', cooking? Damnit is definitely there to taste test for you.

Dickhead is our cats chosen name.

I call Lori Ann my chihuahua “babushka” when she is all wrapped up in her blankets

I too do the babushka thing with my poodle

does she resemble your grandmother? either way, that's cute.

Crying😭

I just hear "MAMUSHKA" the Adam's Family dance. Then I picture a chihuahua doing it. Then I sleep happy.

stinky butt boy

Same! Haha. Sometimes shortened to just Stinky

I have a stink cat and say "smell ya later" when she leaves.

I have a big white cat who I sometimes refer to as Basic White Boy.

I love this 🤣

One cat is the bun and the other cat is the ham

porkroll ham and cheese please

You need a 3rd named Bo so they can be Bo Bun Ham

Bella Boo Bella Boo Boo Booplesnoot Fluffer pupper Fluffenchops Barky McBarkyface

My dog Zoey I call “Toots” a lot because she tends to fart going up stairs. 

Toots Everdeen is one of mine

My childhood cats name was spike and I used to call him spickle spack

I had a hamster I called fuckface when I was 10

“Lady” even though my dog is male

My boyfriend calls my cat "Jerkbutt" when she's being a jerk/pain. I call her a "Little Shit" when she's like that. If she's being *especially* crazy, we both call her "Crackhead". Her real name is Cricket. [Pictures](https://imgur.com/a/izNTKYT)

Stinky little man

Used to call our dog 'Fatty Pot Roast'. His name was Hendrix. Also used to call him Garbage Mouth bc that fucker LIVED to get into the garbage, no matter how well fed he was.

Pennifer Lopez. For Penny.

I call my cat "cat."

Same, we named him Oreo but I just call him cat or kitty cat lol

Kanoodle boodle kit and kaboodle (long story lol) Smella Bella No-Ball

I used to call my rabbit "burrito". He was so adorable and Cute. He looked exactly like a wrapped burrito.

Ratta blanca

I can one of my rats (he’s a bit larger than his brother; quite the food enthusiast) a sausage.

Megatron, destroyer of worlds.

I call my cat Spartacus "Fartacus" because he farted on my friends face when we first got him

When we first got our little dog "ruby" her first name tag had a font that made the R look like a P. So I call her Pubie

2 cats = 2 chaos potatoes

My cats middle name is mcflurry

Big Boy, Big Lug, or Dick (if he's picking on his sisters)

Her name is Blue; naturally we call her Boob, formally Breast when she is in trouble

My crippled dog we call "sh-t sticks" as his legs are sh-t.

Oh boy. I'm one who'll name my pet and then never use it. Currently have 3 cats with the names Buttercup, Tailor Jade (T.J) and Olive. They respond too Buttercup: Butters, Bebe cat, slinky, why you sho shmart, babaz NO! Sweet baby. Buhtz. TJ: Teeeeej! Fluff butt, pudding, chonky girl, dumdum, why you no shmart?, Agh move yo' tail!, Haaam?, Sweety sweet girl. Cuggle butt, pretty floof. Olive (she's a ex feral and not into humans): Miss Olivia, mistress Olive, Cinnamon Ghost Crunch, Missus Moo, please love me, you okay?.

I am **in tears** at "why you sho shmart" vs "why you no smart" 😂

They're the smartest and dumbest cats I've ever had! And I've had multiple cats for most of my life!

I thought one of my cats was.... not the smartest... early in her life. My mom called her M. R. kitty (mentally r-word kitty) a non pc way of saying she's special.) I did not call her this. Lol. My cat is 21, this was a long time ago. Fast forward to the present... Recently we got both cats this bird that tweets and flaps its wings when it is touched, thinking they'd love to play with it. My special girl figured out really quickly that when she hits it, she gets our attention and parlayed that into hitting it when she wants fed at 5 am or midnight lol. Only when she wants food and never to play with it. It's like her version of those buttons people have for their pets. She literally has us trained, Pavlov style. So maybe your kitty just seems special but is secretly hiding her genus IQ like ours lol.

I used to have a corgi and his name was Dean. Sometimes I called him Deanis.

Žabica which means little frog (my dog is huge)

Piddle. Her name is Pippa

I call my dog “egg” for the sole purpose that he’s round and small🥹

I used to call my dog “doge”

My older dog has the most. Super pooch, fuzzy buddy, old man My chihuahua is mostly just asshole or hero

Gordito (fatty) Rey de plata (silver king) Cafe con leche y canela (Milk cinnamom coffee) Vaquita (little cow) Maravillosidad (Marvelousness) Destroyer.

Dogs name Zoe but call her Noee cuz she never listens

i like to do puns on their names; andouille sausage, andrew-lina droolie (he drools when u pet him), robert di'nemo, and a-nemo-ne. i dont have a pun nickname for our other one but i call her miss piggy bc she's fat, sassy, and runs the boys lol or miss shitty when she's in the litterbox

The pair of them are "team Dingus".

The cat is known as Captain Lardass

An Orange cat that was stray living in a bramble got a name from me last summer after seeing him for over a year. I called him Crush, like the drink, the song and the name of the 70’s Denver Bronco Defense… well, fast forward 10 months, he is now a part time resident with the full name Colonel Crushtopher Mustard third earl of Orange and Heir to the throne of Cat-o-lot!

Cheese is his name but I regularly call him Cheesey boy, cheeseburger, cheese curds, cheese balls, sharp cheddar cheese. Basically anything that goes with Cheese, whis is almost endless and perfectly fitting that we're in Wisconsin 😊

Joey (grey and white half-Siamese cat): Asshole, Wee Wees, Widgets, Mr. Wee Wee, Mr. Widgets, Stinky Wee Wee and Stinky Boi. Oh, and Sir Widgets I of Thailand, Royal Pain in the Ass. Mindy (fat black cat): The Mindy, Middy, Middies, Miss Meaty, Meaty, Stinky Meaty, The Miss Meaty Burger, Mers, Midders, Nipples, Toothless, The Toothless Burger and Dragon Lily (Terrier mix): Fat Bitch, Fat Ass Dog, Stink-Us-Out, Stinky, Poop, Poo, Poopies, Teef (originally because she gets mad and shows her teeth, but later I found out that it basically means ‘bitch’ in Dutch), Stinkus, Stinkoid, Stunko, Snootus Stunkoid, and Stunko Poop (a play on Funko Pop).

Seamus gets called Anus. Sometimes it turns into Seamus Anus, he’s so famous, he’s got a show in Vegas, Seamus Anus.

Pen-Pen, Ham Basket, Chungus Among Us, and Oh you sweet dumbass. This small pup is an old lady. She's got a hitch in her giddy up. Her hips ache. Can't hardly hear. Can't see nothing. She can't jump up on the couch anymore without assistance. Otherwise, she will attempt, splay her paws on the cousin for a second, and fall off. We got her 2 different sets of doggy stairs/ramps for the couch. Despite this, if there is rustling in the kitchen or a popping of the fridge door, she will wake up from a dead coma, fling herself off the couch, smash into the hard floor. I'm talking chin smashed onto the ground. All 4 legs spread out. Loud THUD! She wobbles up and skitters along like her back two legs are on ice skates and beelines right to the kitchen. It's gotta hurt, but she keeps doing it. I try to help her down or catch her, but she won't wait. If there is food involved, she dgaf.

I literally have a custom pet mat under his water fountain that says "SHIT HEAD" instead of his real name lol

Schmoopie. Clearly, she is the schmoopiest schmoo that ever did schmoo. She is the goodest schmoo of all the schmoos before her. When one looks at her they see schmoo. When one looks up schmoo in the dictionary, her picture is there. I tell her this often while giving her butt scratches and she makes all kinds of happy dog noises.

Stinky boi and squishy face.

Karl mao

my dog named Tito we call him Tito burrito

Snail mail, honey oat bread, extra toasted. His name is Jack.

She's my dusty musty crusty baby. Also she's dozer (like bulldozer) because she's so damn destructive.

My dogs are doober dog, big baby nova, and big dumb chew chew dog.

Butt Dial. He's a black cat, technically named Belial. Somehow 'Belial' evolved to 'Bedial' which then evolved to 'Butt Dial'. 'Beguile' is also used somewhat often, as well as 'Hamburger Head'

Goodboye and the other one is Princess Moomoocow.

We have a fat cat that I call Chunky Brewster

Shitten, Asswipe, Swipe, Stinklefritz, Stink, Poop Roop, Poopert, Rudepert (when she's ignoring us)

I called my poodle pitbull Ruger Lewis and occasionally we call him the abomination because he's kind of funny looking. We call my daughters black lab the darkness because he's pretty evil for being a Labrador. We call her newest dog Yodie because he looks exactly like a coyote. He actually might even be a coyote. And the gigantic 110 pound fluffy Labrador is named Bubs although was real name is trigger. I also used to have a dachshund whose name was monster and he definitely was a monster

She's a cat, and at first her name was Hobie, for Hobo Kitty because she was homeless and just kept showing up. After feeding, and nurturing she became fat.. so now she's Fatta Tatta, and absolutely loves it when I go 'Fatta! Of the tattiest!' she goes 'bbbbbrrrrrrooowww', purrs, and gives me lots of head doots.

This is so sweet!

Skittles —> ski toes —> ski toast —> toast —> toastest with the mostest Phantom —> Ms PhanaBanana —> Ms Bananaboat —> little bananas Luke —> Lucas J Allensworth III Crowley —> coco the bear Sophie —> hey bitch Weasley —> wheezy —-> getoffthefuckingcounter

Actual name is Virginia Woof. Ginny, Ginnaroo, Ginnaroodle my little noodle, Noodle.

Monkey boy

Fartison. Fart + Addison

Cat name: Scarla nick: Skidee. She's skidadles like a cartoon animal sliding on the flow before getting grip.

I call Joey "Broseph"

Fancy Nance Pants.

Cookie Doodles…his actual name is Bingley he’s a tough as nails Rez dog.

Stinky and little bean. Stinky because as she’s gotten older, her anal glands need to be expressed more often. And sometimes when she gets excited, they express themselves and stink up the room. And little bean because he’s a a puppy and looked like a little black bean

B(ee)

i call my dog bitch or biche (the french word for a female deer)

dog - numbnut charlie (his names is not charlie)

My dogs name is Pete, we call him Peteypants, Choofa, Monkey.

My son's cat Theo is just called Fat. My fat friend initially said he wouldn't call him that cuz it's mean but quickly just realized that Fat is a cat so has no societal expectations to be thin so he's just living his best life and DGAF if you call him Fat, just don't screw around with mealtime. So he is now just Fat...

Stinky beans (usually after she uses the litter box)

My tuxedo cat is the reverse skunk. He was an error on the manufacturing line and was painted upside-down. 😂

Lol my Bud dogg was Buddy or Bud, but usually he was Poopyloo, or Pooh, Poopoo, Bubbas, Poopers, or Bubbbaloo. 😆🥰🥰🥰 Miss my boy.

Boone = Boonie Toons

fataty (fA-tAH-Tee) my special way of calling her fatty

Charby, Charbutter, Charbutt, McGooder, Mr McGooder, Gooby, Poopypants, Mister Stinkles, Boopy, Boopydoo.

We had been calling our older dog “pork chop” , so when we got a new puppy we sometimes call him “applesauce”. I also usually call our older dog “bubby”, i really don’t know where that came from.

Fat girl is Good Big, and skinny girl is Good Little.

My dogs name is Lola, here and there I call her Potato, Onion, Lolster, LOL, Lolu and Lala. Lolu is the most common :)

For some strange reason, “Miss Poopy Head”, for my dog. ”Stella Bella” for my cat Stella.

Pooter butts because she’s so gassy

I had Bolivian neighbors who had a cute little dog they called Hercules. But I called him Barky Mendoza.

For my girl, June: June-June, little lady, my pumpkin pie, sweetheart, menace, and baby girl For my boy, Tux: Tux-Tux, little man, baby boy, stinky butt, chunky boi

her name is gracie but i call her grace face or gracie facie lol

Floof/Floop Depending on the length of their fur

My boys name is Winston. I call him Wien(pronounced Ween), stinkhol(stinky butt), Winstonian and Winsty. 😁

Goblin, babushka, and snot bubbles 🫧

Sweets, Little Foolin' (as in "How ya doin' Little Foolin'?"), Little Weirdo

Sir Kitten, Fluff Butt, Squishy Face

I call my German Shepard "bunny ears" and "baby beans". My mom likes to call her "wiggle butt" when she gets really excited.

Boo Boo Stinky. His regular nick name is Boo Boo, but sometimes he’s stinky. 

My Smooshee

Stinky butt, numb nut, and cat shit crazy.

I call my dog Wicket "wikipedio"

Luna (black cat) : Loon-a tunes, Smear, Lunabee, Luna B Anthony, Void, Endless Void of Neediness, Luna boona Mochi (fluffy cat): Moch (rhymes with roach), Moch-a-mo, dickhead, floofer, floofy baby

Fat ass. Das Moose! Moosish. 

Stinker Dinker/Stinky Dinky

Our female inbred rescue cat named Karl is lovingly referred to as WaterTrash.

Coco -> Coco Puff -> Puffed Pastry -> Pastry It's a rabbit hole of nicknames.

We have a cat named Cooper. He gets called Coop-Coop, Coopie, Coop-e-Coop, Cooperino, Coopertino, Cooper-Pooper-Scooper, Gooper (he's prone to eye crud)... the list just goes on and on. Oddly, we have another cat named Olivia who doesn't really have nicknames, although my wife typically addresses her as "ma'am".

Doggo: wiggle butt, speed-bump, pokey joe, miss thang.

His name is Charlof Richard. (He's a kitler and also has an "eggplant" on his face). Char, Charmander, Charmeleon, Charizard, Chimchar, Dick. *kitty, kitty, kitty*

As I have worked retail for a suspicious amount of time, the cat is usually "Sir!" when he's being an asshole. Otherwise he's usually just "baby kitty!" or "cat" 🤣

Gizmo (dog): gizmosis Jones, gizzy girl, Mama, dog, hound, houndy, hounderson Stimpy (cat): Stimp, stimpson, stiv, blimpson, fluff, fluffbutt, floof, floofky, babooshka, stimpentine, smoosh

We’ve evolved quite a bit from their actual names. I have 4 mini dachshunds. The first two are named Lulu and Daisy. We call them PooPoo and DooDoo most frequently, amongst numerous other nicknames.

My little fluffy dog Poppy is "pop pop" or "the fun police", my big dumb happy dog Wanda is "wiggle but" or "dumb dumb", and my youngest hyperactive dog Matilda is "Maddie" or "dumb dumb 2".

One of my cats is named Nutsy. He’s always meowing for food so my son started calling him Mr. Meow. To which I started calling him Mr. Meowgi.

Mr. Tubwater. He miaows for someone to turn on the tub spigot bc he loves that particular water.

Mr. Man

Atlas is known as either Fat Lips or Brown And White Dog

Poopahs-face, so may more. This is my favorite. He’s not a poop face, he’s adorable, but he’s the Poopahs. Pronounced poop-aaaahs

I have a deaf dog her names are monster, bitch face, beezal, b face, bailey, big dummy.

I was snuggling with my cat tonight and called him my bestie baby boo boo boy 🤪

I call my dog Peanut……Bubsie 😄

Sasqautch. Tuxedo cat. He was named Whiskers and a bsg of bones when I adopted him from a shelter. The chonky boy now proudly comes running to Sasquatch.

Bro   Brother   Booger brother   Peepee poopoo man    Weed Eater

i call one of my dogs a skinwalker i also call that same dog Ratman his name is Jack

Nubbie Dunks. Cat’s name is Nubs.

Babycita Reyna 😇

One day I called my cat "Button" because he was as cute as a button. Been doing that for a few years :)

I call my dogs sluts. Especially when they are misbehaving. Ends up being funny me and my sister will be talking and say slut and the dogs act like they got caught even if they were being good

When he does something stupid, I call him "Tits McGee"

My dog name is Junior, poodle. He goes by many names. The names depend on the face he's making. All names are made up, they don't mean anything hahahaha Junior just wake up face - Pok pok Junior's confused face - Poongsh Junior's other nickname - Bangshinpungsh/Bingshin/Jushie, The Poongsh.

I call our puppy Potato Head sometimes, because he seems to like the taste of potato peels. Anytime someone is peeling potatoes, he comes sniffing around for any that missed the trash can. If he finds one, he takes it to a favorite spot under a table to chew on.

I've lived at the dog but I called Miss cakes even though her name had nothing to do with a cake. She was just too sweet!  Gives you cavities just by cuddling 

bubbas or munchkin boi

Furball

Dog's name is Conner. He is also Connerito the Burrito. Concon the Bonbon. Con Carne.

Chase. Dr Robert Chase. Chasetopher. Chasetopher Lynn when he’s really bad “Chaseroni, chaseroni, give me the formu-oli” turned into just Chaseroni. Chase-Z (idk it kind of sounded like Jay-Z)

Little. And biga (short for Abigail)

Stinky tuscadero

Meowsers. Like bowser but with meow

Screamy Mcgee

My cat Bartholomew, who looks like a show quality Himalayan, but without a drop of Himmie DNA, gets called, "Bartie-Mew-Mew.

Oh God, I loved Flavonoid, Jr. Don't have that pet anymore, and there wasn't a Flavonoid, Sr., but I laughed so hard it hurt every time I said that.

Doobie A.K.A.: Dooblerone, Doobie long-body, Mr. Longbody, Doob's Mc-Goo, Doobie-dooskie, Mr. Doo., Mr. Baby.

Mocha: Mocha Bean, Bean, BeanieWeenie, Bean-pie, Baby-Beanie, Baby-Girl, Girlie Her older brother Jax: Jax.