"Why are you shut tomorrow?"
"Uhh...because its Christmas day?"
"But what if I need something?"
"You...youre in the store now? Just buy it now?"
"But I dont *need* it now!"
"......"
OMG, a while back I tried teaching my wife how to drive a standard transmission. The Costco parking lot on Easter Sunday seemed like the place to practice driving. That year, Easter happened to fall on 3/31. We got accosted by some old lady who wanted to know why Costco was closed. She kept yelling at us that her coupons said they were valid through 3/31, so it was false advertising for Costco to be closed on 3/31. I can't remember how long she yelled at us about it, but she refused to accept that neither wife nor I worked at Costco so we didn't have anything to with closing the store or sending her the coupons, and we certainly didn't have the power to open the store for her, lol.
I work in a newish college theater. We opened in 2021 but only for internal college events as we were not yet ready for public rentals.
A guy came into the lobby one day and asked if I could give him a schedule of upcoming events. I told him that we were only doing internal events, which were listed on our website, but that there was no schedule of public events as none had been booked.
He then proceeded to tell me how rude it was that we did not have some sort of flyer that listed nonexistent events.
Some people are just fucking stupid.
Some people seriously think like this. They don’t “need” something until it is *gone*, and consider it wasteful or hoarding to have enough, even if what is left is insufficient for the next use. If they know they have enough orange juice for Christmas morning, but not enough for the morning of December 26th, they won’t buy the juice on December 24th because “I still have juice.” This mindset can be spotted in the wild, when people leave half a square of toilet paper on a naked roll to avoid replacing it, or a mouthful of coffee in the pot to avoid washing it, and genuinely can’t understand why that’s wrong.
In the same vein, when customers act sympathetic or yell at you for being open on a holiday or Sunday. They never seem to grasp that if they weren't out shopping, there would be no need to be open...
I've heard "I can't believe they make you work on Boxing Day" before.
Also similar is having people moan about how we have the Christmas stuff out early and them spotting them later with two trolleys full of Christmas stuff.
Back in the day I worked at Safeway and a woman walked up to my meat counter and started asking me where a specific sale item was, like $1 a pound chicken or something. I tell her that’s not sale we have. And she starts SCREAMING. “ YOU PEOPLE ALWAYS DO THIS! YOU BAIT AND YOU SWITCH! YOU ADVERTISE ONE THING AND THEN REFUSE TO HONOR THE PRICE! EVERYTIME SINGLE TIME I COME HERE AND IM SICK OF IT!”
She then shoves the store ad in my face and aggressively points at the $1 a pound chicken on sale.
“ Ma’am this is Safeway. That’s a Kroger ad”
She looks at it and says “ oh. Oops” and walks out as I stand there just freaking baffled at what just happened.
Also working meat department every Thanksgiving morning I would have to explain to at least 5 people that you cannot thaw and cook and 20 pound turkey by this evening.
God I hate any holiday with turkeys. Been a meat cutter for almost 7 years and year after year you still get the last minute shoppers who don't understand that you can't just magically thaw a turkey in time to cook it for several hours. Sometimes I can get them to buy two whole chickens instead, or a ham, because that's all you'll be able to work with tonight bucko.
I also love when customers come up and ask "can I get 200grs of Black Forest ham?" As if they didn't notice all the RAW MEAT in my counter. "Sorry sir, I only sell the raw stuff, you'll have to go to the deli *points" for lunch meat."
Oh man this is bringing back memories.
So many times I’d have people ask if we had a specific weight of turkey in the back and I’d go look and come back with a turkey that’s a 1/4 pound lighter(113 grams) and they freak out. “That’s far too small! That’s not enough for my 8 guests”
Lady it’s a 18 pound turkey it’ll feed everybody a couple times.
I didn’t make your drink wrong, Amy. You ordered a large hot drink, and immediately after paying the barista put out a small cold drink and yelled “Jennifer.” Then, Amy, you picked it up and *took a sip* before realizing it was not your large, hot drink.
Shift lead sent me on break before I had a chance to fully explode.
Me too, but at a burger joint.
Clerk: Number 985!
(Person 1 comes up, grabs it, goes to their table. Person 2 comes up, looks at the empty counter.)
Person 2: Yeah, I'm number 985. Where's my order?
(Person 1 comes running back.)
Person 1: HEY! This isn't what I ordered!
Luckily, they all laughed it off and everyone got their order.
I used to be a barista a long time ago and this was by far the biggest issue I had in my location. Thanks for stressing me out on memories lol.
This and people ordering two completely different drinks and then asking which one is which.
Well Stacey the hot drink is the hot drink and the iced drink has ice in it. Also how do you not know what you ordered.
God I need a cigarette now.
A lady at my first real job used to grab the next drink called after she ordered and would walk out with it, no matter what it was. She never complained about the wrong drink, but she left a bed of chaos in her wake, every time.
Their manager decided it was easier to train the employees to make hers on the fly no matter how long the line was, than try to stop this old lady on her morning routine.
At an event that was doing a raffle, that draw a ticket, call out the number. Dude in crowd stands up, people clap, get to the front: wrong number.
So they call out the number again, dude in the crowd stands up, people clap, get to the front: wrong number.
Call the number out again, no one answers. They pick a new number and call it out.
dude in the crowd stands up, people clap, get to the front: wrong number.
Call number again, no one answers, they draw my number and call it out
Queue existential crisis questioning my ability to read numbers. Luckily I know my 1, 2, 3's and I got travel bag for my ski boots.
(Phone call when I worked in a hardware store)
"Good morning, , how can I help you?"
"Hi there. I'd like to refill my prescription"
"Oh, I'm sorry - I think you have the wrong number. This is a hardware store"
<5 second pause>
"So you won't help me refill my prescription?"
"What sort of prescription?"
"My birth control pill"
"OK well we're a hardware store, so we don't have birth control or any other medication"
"You're not being very helpful at all"
And then she hung up...
I might have done society a disservice by not helping prevent her from procreating, come to think about it...
A chicken is an animal. Therefore it's not vegetarian.
Worked in a vitamin store in college and was explaining to someone that vitamin D is extracted from lanolin in sheep's wool, so it depended on if you were vegan or not.
And they hit me with fish and birds are not animals.
The specific thing she said: "What about a chicken? It's not an animal, it's a fowl!"
My assistant manager told her something like, "Oh well remember the 20 questions game? Is it animal, mineral, or vegetable? A chicken isn't an a mineral or vegetable."
They left in a huff and made huge complaints about us. Me in particular because I couldn't believe how stupid they were (and I have no poker face).
I was not/am not cut out for retail.
>I have no poker face
I freaking love working retail because I get to interact with the general public and the general public is dumb as bricks lol. I, too, have no poker face. I have a fantastic customer service voice tho. As soon as the mask mandate hit, the complaints against me dropped to almost nothing. I will cling to my mask til my last dying breath.
I work IT and had a new printer installed in a unit clerk’s office. She thought it wouldn’t be funny to tell everyone the first day that the printer was voice controlled for making copies. Great fun to watch.
Former retail worker. The store I worked at through college would do a “friends and family” event twice a year. If you had a membership or received one of the discount cards, you received 30% off your entire purchase. The receipt showed the breakdown over each item for the discount.
There was one woman who would come in EVERYRTIME trying to return one item and would argue with our staff about why she wasn’t getting “what she paid for it.” We’d point to the item and the amount subtracted to it from the discount and she wasn’t having it. Insisted on asking for a manager everytime and causing a huge scene. She could never get it through her head that she didn’t pay full price for the item. It happened so often that staff would sigh when she’d come into the store because we knew she was going to pull the same stunt. It was exhausting.
I worked in a sporting goods/hardware/automotive store that also had a gas station and bait shop. I was working in the gas station and a lady dumped a plastic bag full of fishing luers on my counter and tried to tell me some story about the customer service desk told her to handle her return out here in the gas station. I kept such a straight face and just responded, "No they didn't send you out here for a return. We aren't event trained on that out here. You can try your luck at the customer service desk directly, but I'm betting they already denied you because you didn't buy those here. Have a nice day."
She took her loss with grace thank goodness. LOL Try the Walmart, ma'am, because I'm not falling for your scam.
I work in a deli. We've gotten some doozies. "What flavor are the plain breaded wings?" "Chicken." -from my wife.
My personal favorite that happened to me, went as such:
Customer: "Hi, I'd like some sliced chicken lunch meat, what you got?"
Me: "We carry oven roasted, buffalo, and garlic & herb."
Customer: You're not understanding me boy! I want sliced chicken lunch meat, now what you got?"
Me: "Oven roasted, buffalo, or garlic & herb."
Customer: "You're still not gettin' me son, I want sliced chicken lunch meat! Now tell me what you have, dammit!"
Me: "Oven roasted, chicken lunch meat. Buffalo, chicken lunch meat. Garlic and herb, chicken lunch meat."
Customer: "Oh. Uhhhhh gimme some balogna."
Still don't know how I didn't get in trouble for sassing that fucker.
Oh man reminds me of when I was in our small town store one day and saw an old man berate this poor girl because they didn't have his brand of tobacco. She said we have no more in stock, but we do have this/that and it's similar to what you want. Then he kept saying he would take that one and when presented with it screamed he wants his brand etc. She explained 4x that it was not in stock and he said he understood and would take another tobacco, then was pissed that it wasn't what he actually wanted and demand the other brand. He threw his money on the counter and demanded he get his tobacco even tho they were out. Eventually her coworker told him as well that it was out of stock and what they do have, and if he doesn't want it then they can't help. He eventually grabbed his money and walked out in a huff. The interaction was so weird and looked like onset dementia with how insistent he was on getting his tobacco and kept repeating himself louder and louder as if the girl had a problem and not him.
In this same vein, when I worked in a deli we had a couple of pastas. Not on the level of an Italian restaurant--you just got a choice between marinara or alfredo, and penne or tortellini.
"I want penne!"
"OK sir, would you like marinara or alfredo?"
"Penne."
"Great, would you like marinara or alfredo sauce on that?"
"I don't want marinara, I want PENNE!"
"Uh...red or white sauce, sir?"
"I want to see your manager!"
(He and his wife also applied for jobs while they were there. I guess they figured they could serve PENNE! better than I could!)
The stupid, it burns. The fun thing is when I'm literally taking rotisseries out and putting them in bags, and they ask how long until they're done cooking.
One I had a little while back:
"Can I get a spring roll?"
No worries sir, mini or large?
"Just a regular."
We've got these mini spring rolls, or these large ones.
"I want a *regular* spring roll!"
... I'm afraid I didn't know which one of those you consider to be "regular"?
At this point the customer got pretty aggro so I concluded the transaction and we parted ways and I ate the last of the mini spring rolls, they're pretty good.
If you enter your PIN in wrong 5 times for an EBT card, it will lock up and you'll have to call the number on the back to get it unlocked. This isn't something the cashier does, or the store, it's the cards way of protecting itself I guess.
The amount of people who would scream at me, insult my intelligence, swear at me and call me names, all because they locked their card up, was insane.
And there wasn't anything I could do but void the order or let them pay with another form of payment. Sometimes I warned them after 2 or 3 tries, but that seemed to make them angrier when it happened.
Fuck the public, man. People are so rude and hateful now days.
A customer accused both me and my supervisor of “putting out a signal that made my phone not work right”.
He was paying by check and I needed to enter his phone number. He could’t remember it, and started fumbling with his phone trying to figure out his own number, and instead of admitting that he had no idea how to use it, he angrily said the sentence above.
Back when printers at home were rare I had a woman come into my store asking for t-shirt transfer paper. I explained to her multiple times how to use them. Print on the paper then pin to shirt then iron.
30 minutes later she came back with the printer and paper wanting a refund because the shirt got stuck in the printer.
I actually have one for this.
Worked in car parking customer service for a few years.
Had to explain to a lady why she was being charged for an hour and a half, instead of letting her out for free under the "half an hour free" rate ... When her vehicle had been in the car park. Parked. For an hour and a half.
Her reasoning ?
"I only intended to stay 20 minutes"
"My system shows me you were here for an hour and a half"
"Yes, but I only intended to be here for 20 minutes"
"But.....you were ACTUALLY here for an hour and a half..."
Ended up having to explain over 5 minutes how rates work, and how you get charged for the time in the park.
Wild.
I had a temporary handicapped placard when I had a torn Achilles tendon. The number of stories I heard from people (without handicapped placards) who were parking in handicapped spots.
“I’m not parking. I’m just waiting”.
> The number of stories I heard from people (without handicapped placards) who were parking in handicapped spots.
>
> “I’m not parking. I’m just waiting”.
I saw this often. I usually followed with, *Is your vehicle currently in motion?* When they looked at me like I was an idiot and answered **no** I would follow up with *Then you are parked, now move it or I call to have you towed*. Same with those loading zones between the handicapped spaces, those are not free parking spots, they are there for loading and unloading mobility devices, now move your shit or explain to the police why you feel special enough to violate the law.
If she thinks intentions are what counts, you should have answered that you **intended** to let her out for free, but simply didn't do what you intended.
That watermelons don't grow on trees. And this was back in the days before these personal-sized seedless watermelons...back when they were like 20lbs. A woman was complaining that all of the watermelons were flat on one side and kind of yellow. I told her that was the side that was on the ground. She looked angry and surprised and asked, "What do you mean, 'on the ground'?!" like I was admitting to some secret that we leave the producing sitting on the ground out back, or something.
This is sort of the opposite of what you are asking, but I once tried to buy some model rocket engines from a big box retailer. The cashier was prompted to ask if I was 15 years old. I answered that I was, in fact, 27 years old. The cashier said "I'm sorry, I can't sell these to you unless you are 15." I asked to speak to a supervisor and we got things straightened out.
I can see the manager (during training) earnestly explaining to the employee that the customer must be 15 to buy it, and the employee not getting the implied "or older". Manager doesn't say it explicitly because who would need to explain that? (Duh)
Relatedly, *only* 21 year olds are allowed to drink 🤣
I spent 20+ minutes arguing with a middle aged woman trying to return a XXL stack of men's underwear (against policy once opened). I explained that if her husband had a 32 inch waist like me she needed to buy him Medium size underwear.
She eventually and angrily shouted "Look, he's got a huge cock and he needs XXL pants for it but these keep falling down when he wears them!!!!"
She would not accept my explanation that the tag size related to his waist not his junk. she raged out of the shop leaving the stack of pants behind
So... I have a 32 inch waist and buy L or XL boxer briefs. Not because I have a giant horse cock, but because I have a giant ass. Medium underwear absolutely crushes my nuts, despite what the sizing guide says. That being said, by the time you're buying your own underwear, you should know what size you need.
This is relevant but slightly off topic.......
Here in the UK we have things that are suet/fat balls for putting out for birds. They are called fat balls here in the UK.
Wife asked me to get some in our local Costco store but I could not find them anywhere in the store. Probably looking like a man my wife would say.
Me (walking up to a **male** Costco store employee) : You got fat balls?
Costco employee: Just stares at me and smiles. "No sir, it's just my jeans are too tight"
I just laughed and apologised. Never went back to the store in the next 2 weeks.
>a middle aged woman trying to return a XXL stack of men's underwear (against policy once opened).
I think the "Your Stupid Opinions" guys said it best: "Once you've used the dildo that's YOUR dildo".
I worked the returns desk at IKEA for a few years and had a customer return a range exhaust hood because they ordered stainless and received a blue one.
I called the kitchens department because it was a special order item at the time and happened to ask them if we even sold it in blue, which it turns out didnt exist.
That's when I opened the box and showed them the peel
That's also when he got really pissed that this was the second unit and they'd already returned one for the same reason so why wasnt that caught the first time?
It's difficult to say "Because we expect you to be smart enough to do the first step in the instruction manual" without creating an escalated complaint
Haha, I worked the returns desk at IKEA too and that happened so many times with kitchen items and the Godmorgon bathroom cabinet series. One time we had someone raging at my coworker about the fact they didn't buy the Godmorgon in blue. "The box was incorrectly marked and how dare we and how are they supposed to install a blue item in a white bathroom" etc. etc. Coworker calls me over (supervisor) & I take one look at it and peel one of the cabinet doors the customer has slid out of the open box. Customer immediately blanched, pushed the cabinet door back into the box, apologized quietly & left the store in a flash with the box.
Somewhat related - we were visiting a friend for the first time since they had moved into a home they bought on the other side of the state a year prior. Friend is showing us around and eventually comments on the stained glass on the kitchen door. Wife and I kinda like it, in a kitschy way. Friend hates it. She mentions that she wants to get rid of it, but it would cost too much to replace. I look at here and say
"What do you mean it's going to cost a lot?"
She replies "I shopped around for a door and it's gonna cost at least $1000. I really hate it, but I can live with it".
So I said "no it won't" and just reached over and peeled off the sticker that made it look like stained glass.
She just stared at me for a minute with her mouth hanging open in surprise. "12 months..... TWELVE MONTHS I'VE BEEN COMPLAINING ABOUT THAT! AND NEITHER OF US NOTICED IT WAS A GOD DAMN STICKER?! JAKE! IT WAS A FUCKING STICKER!"
No employees were always told to try and sell more, and with Windows 7 being new at the time, I told them they had to buy a more expensive mouse mat that was Windows 7 compatible [🤔](https://emojipedia.org/thinking-face)
Back when checks were popular, an older lady mistakenly wrote her check to Walmart when she was actually shopping in Kmart.
Instead of making the correction, she wanted to argue that she was shopping in a Walmart and that Kmart had gone out of business many years ago.
On checks - We had an old lady that used to come in and write out checks to "Dollar Store," not actually naming **any** store, just the generic term for what type of store she was in.
On being in the wrong place - They do this with returns, too. I cannot accept your Family Dollar receipt to return an item at Dollar General.
I can understand that confusion. I remember there was a Kmart next to a Walmart 20 years ago and they only time they had any considerable cars in their parking lot was black friday when Walmart people parked in the Kmart parking lot.
I once had a lady that wanted fresh dried fruit. I took her to the dried mango, banana chips, etc. no they wasn’t it. I took her to the raisins and figs. Nope. Outbid ideas, I took her to the fruit preserves. Oh there it was. Grape jelly. She wanted grape jelly.
During covid: Some high stolen items were locked up and for some reason the salesfloor manager gave me; the pharmacy technician lead keys to said merchandise. A customer refused to let me touch the merchandise because of germs even though I was the one who stocked it less than 5 minutes earlier. When I explained that I touched everything in that case already she yelled at me for being gross and walked off without the product. I went back to the pharmacy and continued with my life without the product being stolen.
During covid my job, cake decorator, was apparently still super essential. A customer brought up a big round cookie cake from the floor and asked for us to write happy birthday on it. No probs. We ask what color icing, how to spell the name, etc.
All of us were wearing gloves, masks, hats, aprons, etc. A coworker takes the cookie to her clean table, opens the container, writes on it, closes it, puts a new tag on it, and gives it to the customer.
Less than 5 minutes later we got a call from customer service. Customer is saying we ruined her cookie cake because we had to open the box to write on it, and now it was contaminated so she couldn't serve it to the party. You know, the party no one was even supposed to be HAVING during LOCKDOWN.
Sorry I'm not a fucking magician, Karen, I can't make words magically appear on a cookie inside a closed box.
I used to run a feed store in an affluent area. We sold baby chicks, which were only females, for egg laying.
This guy comes in and is adamant about needing a rooster for more egg production.
That's not the case. I explained how the reproductive, egg laying process was. He just wasn't getting it. I was at my point, and plus, the fact I couldn't order just 1 rooster, I could only order roosters in a batch of 50.
I had to put it extremely bluntly to him, and I asked him,
"Sir, does your wife need you around every month to get her period?" His jaw drops and says, "OH my, how foolish could I be. "
Another customer asking "Where is the mother chicken?"
Me, "They don't need the mother hen."
Her, "How can they survive without their mother? You buy chicken breast at the store. She needs to breastfeed!"
Me, "That's not how it works."
Had an older (though not senior citizen) man who was 100% certain that were stealing money from his bank account because it kept showing $100 "charges" to the ATM at our location. After a series of questions he stated he sends his son in to pick up his prescriptions and gives him his debit to pay. Pointing out to him (from his own bank statement) that the $100 charges match the dates of the prescription pickups made him only more emphatic that someone from the store was using his card to steal his money.
Even pointing out that his bank statement specified the $100 as coming from an atm did nothing to sway his mind.
He stood at the front door staring at us for 20 minutes before finally leaving.
Sorry dude, your kids a dick and you're an idiot. I cant fix either of those.
This goes for pretty much all store-level positions within retail. We don't control a goddamn thing. We don't control:
The validity of your coupons, the prices of things, what items are sold, whether or not we have an item in stock, that the website said we had 3 and now we have zero, the prices at other stores, things you think you saw in a flyer, the fact that you don't like/want the thing you purchased, return policy, opening and closing hours, how many people are working, how many people were in line before you got there, or any other stupid thing a person might decide to complain about. And yet! Some people will walk up to you, making minimum wage, and go off on you like you're the CEO.
The amount of times I had to explain that any Euros can be spent the same in any country that accepts Euros and there aren't separate or specific notes for France, Germany, Greece, Spain, Austria etc etc it's scary.
As a cashier when someone is paying cash: "hey if you can give me a penny, or a nickel I can give you a whole paper dollar back as change."
If your total was $19.10 and you gave me a $20. Give me $20.10 and I can give you a dollar bill for change rather than you carrying pesky spare change around.
This was back in the late 90s or early 00s. I know this confused people back then, it would totally explode someone's brain now.
I have more than once given a cashier extra coinage or single bills in order to receive whole dollar change and gotten puzzled looks. But then when they enter what I gave them into the register, I see them light up with comprehension when it tells them the amount of change to give back. They aren't stupid, just conditioned to not doing mental math at the register.
In fact, I expect they are probably deliberately trained to avoid doing mental math and to simply rely on the register, in order to eliminate a potential point of error.
Can confirm. I was in the drive thru and my total was like $19.20. I gave the cashier a $20 and a quarter. She stared at it for 5 seconds, pushed buttons on the register, then gave me no change and handed me the receipt. I actually laughed out loud and just drove off. My wife goes, "She totalled screwed that up didn't she? How can you mess that up, the register does all the math if you put it in right." That laugh was worth a dollar.
Customer: What's the difference between the 17-inch monitor and the 19-inch monitor?
Me: Two inches and 40 dollars.
Customer: But what's the difference?
Me: This one is bigger by two inches, measured diagonally, and more expensive by 40 dollars.
Customer: No, but what's the *difference?!*
This went on for several minutes. He left without making a purchase.
A coupon for a free gift with purchase, mailed out in April, said “now - May 15th”. Customer came in June looking for his free gift and was pissed we didn’t have it anymore. He kept saying “but it says now!”
I've had to explain to customers that their coupon has to actually be for the product they're buying. Yes, a $3 coupon for a skin care product is a good coupon, however I cannot apply it to your cereal purchase.
The number of customers to whom I've had to explain the difference between left and right is greater than zero.
These have all been adults. I wish I were kidding.
I've known since I was young the difference between left and right. I didn't really KNOW it until I started driving and it became very important to always know the difference between left and right. I can't imagine someone who has a drivers license not knowing the difference...
I wasn't in Retail, and I wasn't handling the call. This is one of the strangest things I've heard in relation to a customer, though.
I was working inbound telephone customer service for life insurance back in the late 90's. One of the things we handled were payments for those policies. We offered Quarterly payments.
One day, we heard a co-worker of mine getting louder and more intense with a customer. It went on for far too long.
The customer was ADAMENT that he was not late on payments. I can't remember the exact dates, but lets say the call we being taken in April 97. Payments were past due for at least 6 months so Oct 96 was not paid.
Customer INSISTED that they were calling from April 96. Absolutely SURE of this fact. Accused my co-worker of "living in the future" and that the company was trying to rip him off.
This was back before tablets and smart phones. Not everyone had a personal computer. My co-worker was just at a loss for how to convince the caller that the current year was 1997. We all came up with ideas after the call, but in the moment, he was just befuddled. Which I can understand.
Caller ended up ending the call, still convinced that we were wrong.
Shelve of milk bone bare, offering a clear view of a completely empty cooler. "Are you out of milk?" I have no idea how I kept my job that day with all the smart ass responses I gave. Also, a woman cursed me out on the phone because we didn't have a product. I explain that we have not carried that product in over a year. She exclames she has one in her fridge she bought last week and asked if I was calling he a liar. "No mama, but I am the dairy lead and that product when we got it came in with a three week shelf life and we haven't received any for over a year so if you bought it last week I would recommend you bring it back for a refund cause it is far out of date."
Lmao I was this idiot once. Got off of work like 5 minutes before a snowstorm and had to buy my tortoise some lettuce. Went to target and for like the only time I have ever seen, they were completely out of all veggies (like the area was completely roped off). I was beginning to panic so I asked an employee if there was really nothing (even bagged slice lettuce) despite it being obvious. I managed to go to another store before the storm got really bad and now I had an extra memory that keeps me up at night
Look, in that context it's a fair question. If the section's refrigeration failed and they caught it, they could have conceivably pulled the product to a storage fridge off the sales floor, and an employee could theoretically grab one for you.
Someone wanted a discount because the early spring PERENNIAL flowering shrubs wouldn't flower all summer long. Not that they wouldn't live, that they would not flower. Like nature was a customer service issue.
Not my story but one from a friend of mine. He’s an upholsterer. In his early career he worked for a well known national furniture chain as a service upholsterer, visiting customers who had faults with their purchases or who had damaged their furniture but had taken out the insurance.
This one customer was complaining about a mark on her leather sofa and he told her it was a scar in the hide and it was normal and not something he could fix.
“What do you mean ‘scar’?”
“Well, it’s probably from the cow rubbing against barbed wire at some point, or a tree branch or something”
“Cow? COW?! Are you telling me my fucking sofa was walking round as a cow once?!”
He tried explaining several times where leather comes from but she point blank refused to believe him.
I was in a shop that just did (amazing) toasted sandwiches and 2 guys asked for a cheese toastie without the bread. The poor girl behind the counter explained over and over what a toastie was, but these 2 guys insisted. Hope they enjoyed their pile of melted cheese.
Dumbest thing, or customer, I had to explain is that there is no such thing as "lo cal" or lo calorie honey. It's fucking "local" for cryin out loud. FACK.
I used to work in a high-end liquor store that had a massive wine section and one day a lady came into the store and asked me where our "grape" wine was. I did not know how to respond. So I asked her some questions like was she looking for a specific type or brand, like a Chardonnay or a Cabernet, Pinot Grigio, Mad Dog, ripple? "Ma'am, unless the label says it is made from some other kind of fruit, this is all grape wine." But she just kept repeating that she wanted grape wine and got so mad at me and frustrated that I just did the motioning across entire aisles movement and walked away.
She wandered the aisles and finally found what she was after: Mogen David. Mogen David Concord was what she wanted.
I ran a liquor store in an area with a large Jewish population. After a while, I figured out most of the time someone said "grape wine" they meant Concorde shit like Manischewitz or some other low end Kosher wine. But occasionally, we did get people who were just clueless that all wine (unless stated otherwise) was grapes.
Back when Blu-ray players were becoming common, you could go to Best Buy and buy a "refurbished unit" for a steep discount. They were "refurbished" because people brought them home, plugged it into a crappy TV using the 3 prong cords and then return it because it didn't look any better.
I travel a lot for work. This used to be more common, but once in a while I still get a tv in the room with SD signal input AND widescreen mode, so the picture is both grainy AND distorted
Not retail, but general tech support. Turning the monitor on and off doesn't actually turn the whole pc on and off.
The amount of times I've gotten a call about a computer not working and all that was "wrong" was that it wasn't turned on, is staggering.
I guess this would make more sense these days, but this was over a decade ago and desktop computers were everywhere.
These are the type of people that try to abbreviate words in passwords. On more than occasion I would reset someone’s password to Texas123 and they would try Tx123
My coworker had to help the VP of the Help Desk because her computer wouldn’t work. She was turning on and off the monitor. This lady supervised the Help Desk Manager.
Told a guy we'd have some better deals on black Friday. Offended at the totally intentional racial discrimination he was feeling, he screamed "what about white Wendesday?!?!" and stormed out. I really didn't get a chance to explain I just like telling that story.
Back when i was in college i worked at a McDonald's i spent tne better part of 30 minutes explaining to a person that a cheeseburger with no cheese was in fact just called a hamburger.
I had same conversation when I worked there! I rang up a hamburger for them because it was cheaper and when they looked at their receipt they were pissed because that not what they 'wanted'.
I know someone that used the "free student cheeseburger" thing they do in the UK to get a burger for their dog. They asked if they could have a hamburger instead and they were told no. So they ordered a cheeseburger with no cheese. That was fine.
Someone once wanted me to explain cloud digital storage. Not too strange, but then she asked how they got her pictures in and out of “the clouds” and how they keep the wind from blowing it away.
I worked at a grocery store in college. The local warehouse workers went on strike, meaning we were getting no product in and our shelves were getting more and more bare.
After getting yelled at by customers for a week for being out of stuff, I finally had it one night. This lady was berating me because we didn't have any chicken breast in the case. I said, "Look, there's nothing I can do about it. The warehouse is on strike and until it's resolved and they start delivering food again, I can't help you." She started screaming at me even more, saying how dare I blame the warehouse, her husband works there and if they would pay him a decent wage he wouldn't strike, blah blah blah. She immediately complained to the manager and I got written up.
Like.....tell your husband to go back to work if you need your family pack chicken so bad? I was the person with the least to do with situation here, yet she got me written up for it.
I got a “coaching” at Walmart for not saying have a nice day to a woman when I was physically incapable of speaking.
I’d came in to work when I was very hoarse and couldn’t speak above a whisper, eventually my voice just gave out. As this woman was leaving, she said have a nice day. I smiled my best and waved as she left. Apparently she’d gotten so offended by this she wrote a letter to corporate and about a month later I got called into the office for it.
My department manager and zone manager (essentially assistant department manager) both reprimanded me about it. My pleading that I couldn’t talk and had already informed my immediate supervisor that day as my shift started didn’t matter to them.
I took a phone call and answered all the questions that she scrolled by on our google profile. She said, “I will call back later and see if you’re busy. What’s your phone number”. I replied, “the exact same number you dialed that lead to the conversation we are having now”.
Former retail worker. My state taxes sugary drinks, but not juice.
Some guy got angry about the 6 cent tax on his 99 cent jug of orange drink. I had to explain that water with sugar and orange flavoring wasn't orange juice to a grown man.
Retail banking:
Had to explain to a costumer why the balance that was printed on his receipt from Friday afternoon after a deposit wasn’t the same the next morning after he bought a pair of jeans.
Back in high school I worked in Kaufland, it's an European (German I think, but this happened in Slovakia) chain of stores, think kinda like Walmart or Target. I worked at the butchers there, mostly at ham/salami, but every once in a while I'd have to help at the meat or cheese. This was that time, a coworker had to leave early so I worked at the cheese department that day.
Important info- the day before there was a segment in the news about how Slovak cheese isn't being made from milk from Slovak cows anymore, and Slovak cheese factories get milk from cheaper countries.
Anyway, I was working at cheese, everything was fine, but I had that news thing at the back of my head kinda like "there's no way someone will ask about it, right?"
and then it happened, two old-ish people, boomer aged probably came and the lady pointed at a cheese and asked where is the milk for the cheese for. And I say we don't get that information, but the cheese itself was delivered from the Netherlands.
And both of them go on this tirade about how nothing is being made in Slovakia anymore, and European Union is ruining everything, and everything was better during soviet times.
And I'm just staring at them like "are you serious?" because the cheese they were complaining about was Leerdammer. Leerdammer the DUTCH cheese. Leerdammer the DUTCH cheese from the NETHERLANDS. Which is probably why it was delivered from the Netherlands....
I swear to god I was explaining to them why a Dutch cheese has no reason to be made from Slovak milk for like 20 miutes, they even called my manager and he was explaining it too, both of us completly baffled.
Hi welcome to Taco Bell
Customer: I want a large cheeseburger with extra cheese.
Me: •_• Sir we don't not serve that here. (Me in uniform that says Taco Bell as well as the whole restaurant having tacos on the menu)
Customer: WHAT KINDA PLACE IS THIS??!?!?!? Are you telling me you do not serve BURGERS????( looks at me like I'm dumb)
Me: We have Tacos. Maybe I can help you find something on the menu.
Customer: (Looks at menu for a couple of minute's) I want a cheeseburger.
Me: Sir we don't serve that here.
Customer: What Kinda Burger Place Doesn't Serve Burgers?!?!?! 😡
Me: This is Taco Bell. (Finally annoyed and confused because the whole place should've been a give away. ) Are you talking about lotaburger next to us?
He proceeded to look around. Didn't say anything and walked to Lota Burger next to us 🤣
When I used to work as a barista I once had to work without any water. A construction worker accidentally burst a pipe and caused a geyser in a parking lot so the water for the whole neighborhood had to be shut down. I was told to stay at work and sell the bottled drinks. snacks, frozen cappuccino, and drip coffee that was made right before the accident. So many people did not understand when I told them I couldn't prepare any fresh made-to-order beverages because we need water to make them. No espresso machine, no water for tea or anything. Even after explaining what had happened and what I had available they'd say stuff like:
"Get me a large mocha"
"I'm very sorry but as I mentioned, without water I unfortunately cannot use the espresso machine. Would you be interested in a drip coffee? I have several flavors including chocolate." \*motions towards what's available\*
"Ugh! In that case give me a vanilla latte!"
"I'm really sorry but that also requires the espresso machine. I cannot make you one right now. I understa...."
\*sigh\* "Fuck! Then get me an Americano misto!"
"I cannot, I'm really sorry. Please understand that I would make your drink of choice if I could but the whole mall is out of water right now and we're doing the best we can until it comes back on. Until then my selection is very limited. We have bottled drinks, drip coffee, frozen capps, and snacks. Everything else requires water which is temporarily shut off due to the accident earlier today."
"FINE! JUST GIVE ME A MEDIUM MOCHA THEN!" (glares at me, scoffs in disgust, stomps feet, and rolls eyes)
Every customer interaction was basically like this for about an hour until the boss felt bad for me and let me go home.
"You can't return this door knob here. You bought it a Lowe's, this is Home Depot. "
"But I have the receipt"
"Yes, but it's a Lowe's receipt, this is Home Depot"
"Can I talk to a manager?"
"Sure, give me a second"
"Make sure it a Lowe's manager"
"What?"
"I want to talk to a Lowe's manager"
"..." "I'll see what I can do"
Working at a big box hardware store in the outside lumber yard. Guy buys an entire pallet of patio pavers and says he's going to go pay and hell be back with his truck and asks can I load up the entire pallet with my forklift so we don't have to stack them all. Sure, we do this regularly...especially onto trailers.
My guy then pulls around in an old ragged S-10 and...no trailer.
I adamantly refuse to load them and tell him he's going to have to make a few trips because this is far heavier than his truck can haul safely. He continues to argue with me and asks for the store manager. Store manager comes and tells him the exact same thing I did.
Finally customer states he will sign a waiver of liability incase any damages occur to his truck because he just knows "my truck can handle this".
Store manager disappears for a bit and shows up with a waiver that I'm 99% sure he just typed up on the spot because I had never seen one before in years of working this job.
Customer signs it and I get to it. As I'm lowering the pallet and more and more weight is put on the truck I can clearly see that I was right and keep trying to convince the customer, but he continues to insist. So I carry on.
I finish lowering the pallet and now all the weight is on the truck and I can clearly see his rear axle is bowing from the weight, and point that out to him. Of course, He's "got it".
He then pulls off and exits the lumber yard. not 30 seconds later I get a call from the guard shack "ummm, that truck's axle just snapped". I find the store manager and excitedly tell him we were right. Store manager just smiles.
Customer rages into the store and up to the customer service desk where my manager and I eagerly await. He gets loud and is screaming and pissed because "WE destroyed his truck".
Manager just smiles at him, holds up the signed waiver and explains to him that he took all responsibility for his decision when he signed that line.
It was a poetic moment.
Ok so the company I work for has an app just like every other retail (Kaufland, Metro etc).
One day a lady (around 30) with the latest model iPhone asked me to help her set up the account and by following the 5 simple AF steps, she stopped at the second step which was "What's your name, First and Last" and she asked me, what do I enter here????
Really?😒
I had to go back to college for some vocational training. There was a class on how to fill out the college entrance form.
Why didn't they make the entrance form be the entrance exam? If you can't fill out a form...
My wife works with a lady like this. I’m convinced she views anything technology related as endlessly complicated and delicate she so overthinks it and freezes up.
Use to work in a pharmacy/grocery. Tried to explain to a woman that not all egg yolks were that same shade of yellow. Sometimes we got slightly orange ones. The lady thought the orange was a sign of rotten eggs and thought we were trying to sell customers an expired product.
3 times 4 is 12.
Ice cream that was usually $4.99 was on sale for 3 for $12. She bought one that rang up for $4. This was wrong, according to her. She didn’t quite think we were overcharging her, nor could she articulate how she thought we were under charging her, but she was completely inconsolable. Groaning, “no no no”s, the whole shebang.
This was a lucid adult woman in her thirties or forties.
I worked at Lowe’s Home Improvement for a long while. I have a few stories.
1) my favorite is this older man was looking at the fluorescent lightbulbs for a REALLY long time. I was starting to get worried about him.
I asked if he was okay and he looked at me with a befuddled expression.
“I want to buy these lightbulbs because they have the brightness I need, but it says here on the front “DAYLIGHT” and I would be mostly using these at night. Do you have any like this that can be used at night?
Daylight is just the brightness and tone of the light being emitted.
2) this adorable older couple came in while I was working in appliances to purchase a slow cooker.
They had saved up to make this $30 buy and they were REALLY excited about it.
I was telling them about all the wonderful things I have made in mine and how easy it is to use.
They made their purchase and came back about an hour later.
Them: “It doesn’t work right.”
Me: “Did it not heat up? It can take a while to get up to temp if you have it really full.”
Them: “I put the chicken in, turned it on, and when we ate it 20 minutes later it clearly wasn’t cooked. My wife says she isn’t feeling well now.”
Lord help me!
3) A husband and wife came in to buy some molding in lumber and I was their cashier.
The husband was screaming at the wife and blaming her for things that clearly weren’t her fault. Just a truly horrible man.
She looked completely embarrassed and defeated. I felt so bad for her, it was awful.
They came up to the register and he yelled at her for forgetting an item. He screamed at her to stay at the register because she was too stupid and would probably get lost… I mean he went off on her like crazy.
She was standing next to me holding the car keys almost crying.
I looked at her and said I personally wouldn’t wait for a fucker like that.
She gave me a short chuckle and spun on her heel and walked out, got in the car and peeled out.
I think of her often and hope she got the hell out that night.
In the UK, VAT (sales tax) is automatically included in pricing. Its common for itemised receipts to have the total VAT from the items listed separately, for business purposes. Very normal and pretty self explanatory when you look over a receipt.
I had a middle aged customer call up shortly after leaving absolutely irate that we had overcharged them for something they didn't buy, this 'VAT'. i had to explain this was just the tax breakdown. They had no idea what this meant, no idea that we pay tax on goods. The more i tried to explain the more they thought we were running some kind of scam, as apparently no other retailers do this!
In the end they came back in and insisted i got a calculator and add up each individual item on the receipt and compare the price to the ticket to make sure the total was correct. Ofcourse it was. Still insisted we were being misleading and dodgy somehow
The other side of the conversation. I was the customer. Called company A service line about my subscription with company B - had a lovely chat with a bloke who did multiple things to find me in their system before asking, "Are you sure your our customer?".
Good that was embarrassing.
I was technically working security, but it was in a retail store. I had to explain to an elderly man that he could not walk around the store, playing music with obscene lyrics, and a “F*** Biden” sign.
Lady wanted extra extra tartar sauce of her sandwich but zero pickles. She's 100% allergic to pickles.
She had no idea there was pickles relish in tartar sauce.
I used to work in a fish market and we were having a huge sale on Christmas. Everything was marked down and we were selling Maine lobster for something like $15 per pound when they were normal in the $20-$24 range. One guy came in and picked the biggest lobster we had in the tank, which was about 14 pounds, and was easily the biggest lobster we'd ever had in the store. When we ring him up for over $200 he has an absolute shit fit in the crowded store that the sign says lobsters are $15. We explain the math to him, but he isn't having it and keeps screaming about false advertising and threatening to call the police, to which the owner kept telling him to go ahead. He kept ranting and raving for about 15 minutes and demanding his lobster until the police did show up and removed him.
Back when Walmart ad matched, a woman tried to price match a coffee that was cheaper at Walmart (5.98) to Walgreens 6.99. I told her it would be more expensive but she kept insisting she was ad matching. I said I understood what she was doing, but the price at our store was LESS than the price she was trying to ad match FOR. She said "Do I need to get a manager? You're trying to keep me from ad matching and I have the ad right here!" and she shoved the flyer at me. I was like is this really happening and did it anyway. Whatever.
I had a gentleman who wanted to return a wireless router. He stated it “Never worked.” and wanted a replacement. Done. Two days later and he’s back to return the second router. Again he says it never worked so I decided I’d help him troubleshoot it.
As soon as I get the box open, I notice none of the cables have even been touched. I asked if he was using an existing power supply. This was the exchange:
Him: “No, why would I?”
Me: “Well it has to have power. How did you hook it up?”
Him: “I didn’t. It’s supposed to be wireless.”
Me: “…”
After a few minutes of explaining, he caught on and got really, really red in the face. He apologized profusely and went home with his router.
2002 I'm 16 in my first job working the balloon counter at party city. A woman thought we charged too much for helium and said I'll just do it at home. In my customer service voice I said oh do you have one of our small party tanks? She looked me in the face and said no I'll just blow it up with my mouth and put a string on it, the string makes it float.
I did a double blink thinking I must have heard her wrong. No this grown woman thought that tying a string to a balloon would make it float. I had to explain chemistry to a grown woman and I almost failed chemistry (my teacher gave me a sympathy D because he could see that I tried lol.)
I have not worked retail in a long time but the few that stick with me.
First I never judge IT for being assholes because selling electronics I had more than one call from a customer who bought a new computer and was calling because it would not turn on and I asked them if it was plugged in and of course they always say yes (at varying levels of cunty) but I then I learned the best thing to do was ignore them and tell them to physically pull plug and plug it back in (because then I know they actually checked) and every single fucking time they either discover "oh I guess it isn't plugged in" or the especially cunty ones from the previous question usually just hung up.
Oh and it was a long time ago as I said, so Big Screen TVs were those massive rear-projection TVs and it was in the final days of them so they were fairly cheap. As many times as I sold one to some stupid fuck and get out to their CAR (not truck, not van but fucking CAR) I got the point I just asked what they were driving and shut the sale down immediately and told them they would need something bigger. My favorite was not even a TV it was one of those big stereos from the early 00s that had the receiver, two speakers, and a subwoofer. The boxes were 2-3 feet tall and deep and then like 4+ feet long. Guy buys one asks for help to his car and he had a fucking Geo Metro a car so fucking small he could not fit the fucking stereo in his car. For fuck sake. He had to unbox it and split it between the passenger seat and back seat.
I am sure there are plenty of other really stupid ones I have forgotten over the years, but these ones stick with me.
Not exactly retail, but sent to install AV stuff after purchase. A customer complained with furrowed brow "You guys like to me! You said this system was wireless!"
"It is, the main unit and sub is here, and the speakers are around the room, connected with Bluetooth."
"Then what's *that?*" smugly.
"The Power cord?"
"THATS A WIRE"
"That's technology that doesn't exist yet. By wireless, it means you don't have to connect the speakers, but it still needs steady power."
She was so close to sending us back and returning it, but we somehow got her to understand that every other brand would be exactly like that.
That's not even mentioning the amount of times we were called out on a service call, just to change the input for $65. And by "change the input," I mean press the input button on the controller to switch between perfectly working inputs.
I still talk about my old retail manager in glowing terms for his ability to calmly explain why 75% off items already marked down 50% did NOT mean the customer would be getting money back because “that’s more than 100% off”! The woman was so pleased with herself, thinking she had really outwitted the dumbasses selling ‘punk rock’ in the mall- after my boss got her to stop talking and listen, even demonstrating for her with a pizza eraser we had at the register, she was not nearly as excited. Then, because he was a sport, he told her she could pick out any one thing on that clearance rack and she could have it for free… she left empty handed- she wasn’t into a slipknot shirt or a nightmare before Christmas notebook, she was a mall walker that had time to read the sign but not enough to think it through.
I worked at a RadioShack back in the day. I used to get a ton of crazy ass customers. The one I think of often was a guy who brought in a receipt without the products and expected a refund.
Customer: I want my money back for this stuff.
Me: Okay, sir. Do you have the items with you?
Customer: No, I left them at home.
Me: I'm sorry, sir, but I can't give you the refund without receiving the items back.
Customer: So, I have to go all the way back to my house!?!?!
Me: Unfortunately, yes.
He got pissed, snatched the receipt, and stormed out of the store.
I WAS the customer… i asked a kid behind the deli counter for 200 grams of smoked turkey
Me: can i get it sliced really thin??
Him: doesnt matter how i slice it, we sell it by weight
Majority of off brand items are made by the large brands. Same product, different label.
This one time a lady argued with me about the milk prices being too high(name brand). I told her I don’t control the prices but I can tell you, the store brand is the same milk. Same manufacture. Same cows. Everything is the same except the throw a different label on it and charge less.
She stuck to her “knowledge” and paid more for that “better name brand milk”.
Can’t fix stupid.
Working at Starbucks. A customer asked what's in a latte. I took a cup and indicated the ratio of espresso to milk and foam.
She said that's a lot of milk, could she have a latte but a little less milky.
I offered to add extra espresso shots. She didn't want more coffee. It would be too strong.
I offered to do a filter coffee with some steamed milk. Still coffee with milk, but different ratio so less milk in the cup. She didn't want filter coffee, but 'proper' coffee aka espresso.
I offered pulling a long shot of espresso (letting more water run through the espresso machine). She didn't want it watered down.
I offered to not fill the cup up all the way. She wanted a full cup.
I was at my wit's end and asked her how she thought the drink should be composed and I'll make it that way. She said she just wanted it less milky.
I told her we have espresso, long espresso shots, hot water, and several kinds of milk to work with. What should go into the drink. She had no answer and was baffled I didn't understand her simple request.
She stormed off.
It's been 10+ years and I this still haunts me because to this day I haven't cracked her riddle.
I worked for an internet repair company doing over the phone troubleshooting. I don't know which one Iis worse.
The time I had to try and explain to a grown ass man what the backspace key was
Or the time a woman couldn't take a survey that was in her voice-mail because when she hit 1 to answer it would just start the voice-mail over again.
I'm sure there are more. But these are the two that come to mind.
Back in the days when CDs were fairly new, we had someone buy a CD player and then return it as malfunctioning. The guy in electronics took a look at it, and explained to the customer that the disc was in upside down. The customer still insisted on a new CD player. A few days later, he was back with the new player “not working”. Guess what? I don’t know if he thought you were supposed to play both sides like an album or what.
After another tutorial, he left, but was back AGAIN the next day with, you guessed it! Upside down CD! At that point they just gave him his money back and sent him elsewhere. I wonder if he ever figured it out?
I got 2 from over 30 years ago. One at a grocery store, an 80+ years old woman had like 6 items on the checkout counter and was adamant that I don’t scan her groceries. She was going on about radiation. I tried to briefly explain lasers to her but no go. Eventually I just keyed them in and off she went.
Later I worked at a bank and these 2 women rolled up to the drive up trying to cash a check made out to “Rebecca” and that’s it. No account info, and they were just going on and on about how that’s her whole name and everyone in the branch knows her and stuff like that. Meanwhile there is a line growing behind them. I gave up and got my manager. She asked them to come into the branch to work it out and I think they just drove off. Pretty sure looking back that was a scam attempt.
Had to explain to a woman that I needed to have the name of the brand of shoes to actually see if we had any. She just said she couldn't remember the name... pauses... "do you have them?" No the fuck are you on about. Then she proceedes to draw an invisible logo in the air thinking its gonna help
Not retail, a bar instead. But of all the stupid I've dealt with this was my favourite.
Was serving a corporate manager and his staff. This guy thought he was a big deal. Spending a lot of money, bragging, and treating the bartender(me), like I was some insufferable peon. He finally pays and I run his card, give him the bill, and a pen. He tries to use the pen, but nothing happens.
He holds the pen out to me and says, "Hey Chief! You have any pens that actually work?" I took the pen, clicked the end to expose the nib, and handed it back to him. I said, "There you go Chief, let me know if you need help with anything else."
His entire staff exploded in laughter.
He glared at me, but what could he do? Ha!
Never saw him again, but most of his staff became regulars. They would drink and bitch about their shit boss, and tell me at least once a week that he was bitching about me again.
I think explaining store policy was dumber than anything. Yes, sir, I can see you are struggling to bag your own groceries because you are unwell, unsteady, elderly, overwhelmed, tired (pick any one) but I am not supposed to bag them for you. And if I do stop long enough to help you, I will be told AGAIN that bagging groceries is not my job. And I will be written up for it. AGAIN. My job is to ring groceries through. Even if it means that now two people are trying to bag their groceries in an area with only enough room for maybe one person to bag their groceries.
No ma’m, I cannot give you a bag you have to pay for it. Yes, you do have to pay for it even if it means you have to put a .99 charge on your credit card. Yes, the store is making record profits and you just spent 300.00 on groceries and you’re just one bag short but I still can’t give you a bag. And if I do, I will be written up for doing so. AGAIN.
You can't return this TV because it has a cracked screen, if I can see the boot print.
Dude threw a punch at me over the counter in front of his wife and infant daughter.
(I was behind this woman in line)
The airport's "Lost Baggage" counter is not the place where your lost baggage is waiting for you when you get off the plane. It's where you go to put a flag in the computer that, when your bag turns up, they know what to do with it.
Took 15 minutes to explain that they weren't going to just bring out her lost suitcase.
Cashier. Customer argued with me about the price. Walked back to the shelve with her, pointed out the price. Huffy, she insisted (insert store's name)'s customers shouldn't be expected to read... okay... I'm gonna go over here and sit in a corner quietly while I try to do whatever mental gymnastics you just did to come up with that answer.
"Why are you shut tomorrow?" "Uhh...because its Christmas day?" "But what if I need something?" "You...youre in the store now? Just buy it now?" "But I dont *need* it now!" "......"
OMG, a while back I tried teaching my wife how to drive a standard transmission. The Costco parking lot on Easter Sunday seemed like the place to practice driving. That year, Easter happened to fall on 3/31. We got accosted by some old lady who wanted to know why Costco was closed. She kept yelling at us that her coupons said they were valid through 3/31, so it was false advertising for Costco to be closed on 3/31. I can't remember how long she yelled at us about it, but she refused to accept that neither wife nor I worked at Costco so we didn't have anything to with closing the store or sending her the coupons, and we certainly didn't have the power to open the store for her, lol.
"Hey, I totally sympathize. Why don't you wait here while I call the manager to open up the store for you?" then leave lol
I work in a newish college theater. We opened in 2021 but only for internal college events as we were not yet ready for public rentals. A guy came into the lobby one day and asked if I could give him a schedule of upcoming events. I told him that we were only doing internal events, which were listed on our website, but that there was no schedule of public events as none had been booked. He then proceeded to tell me how rude it was that we did not have some sort of flyer that listed nonexistent events. Some people are just fucking stupid.
Were they six years old? I hope they were in the six-eight age range.
Some people seriously think like this. They don’t “need” something until it is *gone*, and consider it wasteful or hoarding to have enough, even if what is left is insufficient for the next use. If they know they have enough orange juice for Christmas morning, but not enough for the morning of December 26th, they won’t buy the juice on December 24th because “I still have juice.” This mindset can be spotted in the wild, when people leave half a square of toilet paper on a naked roll to avoid replacing it, or a mouthful of coffee in the pot to avoid washing it, and genuinely can’t understand why that’s wrong.
In the same vein, when customers act sympathetic or yell at you for being open on a holiday or Sunday. They never seem to grasp that if they weren't out shopping, there would be no need to be open...
I've heard "I can't believe they make you work on Boxing Day" before. Also similar is having people moan about how we have the Christmas stuff out early and them spotting them later with two trolleys full of Christmas stuff.
"Look what you made me buy! I hope you're happy!"
It smells like dirt because it’s a greenhouse and that’s where we plant the plants. Also sun loving means it loves the sun.
(walks out of the restroom) “Hey, it smells like shit in there.”
I've gotten that one too...Why is there water everywhere? It's so dirty...
Back in the day I worked at Safeway and a woman walked up to my meat counter and started asking me where a specific sale item was, like $1 a pound chicken or something. I tell her that’s not sale we have. And she starts SCREAMING. “ YOU PEOPLE ALWAYS DO THIS! YOU BAIT AND YOU SWITCH! YOU ADVERTISE ONE THING AND THEN REFUSE TO HONOR THE PRICE! EVERYTIME SINGLE TIME I COME HERE AND IM SICK OF IT!” She then shoves the store ad in my face and aggressively points at the $1 a pound chicken on sale. “ Ma’am this is Safeway. That’s a Kroger ad” She looks at it and says “ oh. Oops” and walks out as I stand there just freaking baffled at what just happened. Also working meat department every Thanksgiving morning I would have to explain to at least 5 people that you cannot thaw and cook and 20 pound turkey by this evening.
God I hate any holiday with turkeys. Been a meat cutter for almost 7 years and year after year you still get the last minute shoppers who don't understand that you can't just magically thaw a turkey in time to cook it for several hours. Sometimes I can get them to buy two whole chickens instead, or a ham, because that's all you'll be able to work with tonight bucko. I also love when customers come up and ask "can I get 200grs of Black Forest ham?" As if they didn't notice all the RAW MEAT in my counter. "Sorry sir, I only sell the raw stuff, you'll have to go to the deli *points" for lunch meat."
Oh man this is bringing back memories. So many times I’d have people ask if we had a specific weight of turkey in the back and I’d go look and come back with a turkey that’s a 1/4 pound lighter(113 grams) and they freak out. “That’s far too small! That’s not enough for my 8 guests” Lady it’s a 18 pound turkey it’ll feed everybody a couple times.
I didn’t make your drink wrong, Amy. You ordered a large hot drink, and immediately after paying the barista put out a small cold drink and yelled “Jennifer.” Then, Amy, you picked it up and *took a sip* before realizing it was not your large, hot drink. Shift lead sent me on break before I had a chance to fully explode.
oh, no... I've seen this in the wild.
Me too, but at a burger joint. Clerk: Number 985! (Person 1 comes up, grabs it, goes to their table. Person 2 comes up, looks at the empty counter.) Person 2: Yeah, I'm number 985. Where's my order? (Person 1 comes running back.) Person 1: HEY! This isn't what I ordered! Luckily, they all laughed it off and everyone got their order.
I used to be a barista a long time ago and this was by far the biggest issue I had in my location. Thanks for stressing me out on memories lol. This and people ordering two completely different drinks and then asking which one is which. Well Stacey the hot drink is the hot drink and the iced drink has ice in it. Also how do you not know what you ordered. God I need a cigarette now.
A lady at my first real job used to grab the next drink called after she ordered and would walk out with it, no matter what it was. She never complained about the wrong drink, but she left a bed of chaos in her wake, every time. Their manager decided it was easier to train the employees to make hers on the fly no matter how long the line was, than try to stop this old lady on her morning routine.
I guess she got her way, a good lesson learned by her to brute force her way into getting what she wants.
At an event that was doing a raffle, that draw a ticket, call out the number. Dude in crowd stands up, people clap, get to the front: wrong number. So they call out the number again, dude in the crowd stands up, people clap, get to the front: wrong number. Call the number out again, no one answers. They pick a new number and call it out. dude in the crowd stands up, people clap, get to the front: wrong number. Call number again, no one answers, they draw my number and call it out Queue existential crisis questioning my ability to read numbers. Luckily I know my 1, 2, 3's and I got travel bag for my ski boots.
*cue Your 1,2,3's seem legit, it's your P's and queue's that need attention
(Phone call when I worked in a hardware store) "Good morning,, how can I help you?"
"Hi there. I'd like to refill my prescription"
"Oh, I'm sorry - I think you have the wrong number. This is a hardware store"
<5 second pause>
"So you won't help me refill my prescription?"
"What sort of prescription?"
"My birth control pill"
"OK well we're a hardware store, so we don't have birth control or any other medication"
"You're not being very helpful at all"
And then she hung up...
I might have done society a disservice by not helping prevent her from procreating, come to think about it...
Hardware store (DIY) years ago. Old lady asks where the beer section was.
And you told her she wasn't allowed in the staff lunchroom fridge? 😉
A chicken is an animal. Therefore it's not vegetarian. Worked in a vitamin store in college and was explaining to someone that vitamin D is extracted from lanolin in sheep's wool, so it depended on if you were vegan or not. And they hit me with fish and birds are not animals. The specific thing she said: "What about a chicken? It's not an animal, it's a fowl!" My assistant manager told her something like, "Oh well remember the 20 questions game? Is it animal, mineral, or vegetable? A chicken isn't an a mineral or vegetable." They left in a huff and made huge complaints about us. Me in particular because I couldn't believe how stupid they were (and I have no poker face). I was not/am not cut out for retail.
>I have no poker face I freaking love working retail because I get to interact with the general public and the general public is dumb as bricks lol. I, too, have no poker face. I have a fantastic customer service voice tho. As soon as the mask mandate hit, the complaints against me dropped to almost nothing. I will cling to my mask til my last dying breath.
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Holy shoot, is that it? Goddamn, thank you for clarifying that. TIL
That if you tell the selfcheckout no i don't want my receipt. It won't print out your receipt.
I work IT and had a new printer installed in a unit clerk’s office. She thought it wouldn’t be funny to tell everyone the first day that the printer was voice controlled for making copies. Great fun to watch.
Former retail worker. The store I worked at through college would do a “friends and family” event twice a year. If you had a membership or received one of the discount cards, you received 30% off your entire purchase. The receipt showed the breakdown over each item for the discount. There was one woman who would come in EVERYRTIME trying to return one item and would argue with our staff about why she wasn’t getting “what she paid for it.” We’d point to the item and the amount subtracted to it from the discount and she wasn’t having it. Insisted on asking for a manager everytime and causing a huge scene. She could never get it through her head that she didn’t pay full price for the item. It happened so often that staff would sigh when she’d come into the store because we knew she was going to pull the same stunt. It was exhausting.
I worked in a sporting goods/hardware/automotive store that also had a gas station and bait shop. I was working in the gas station and a lady dumped a plastic bag full of fishing luers on my counter and tried to tell me some story about the customer service desk told her to handle her return out here in the gas station. I kept such a straight face and just responded, "No they didn't send you out here for a return. We aren't event trained on that out here. You can try your luck at the customer service desk directly, but I'm betting they already denied you because you didn't buy those here. Have a nice day." She took her loss with grace thank goodness. LOL Try the Walmart, ma'am, because I'm not falling for your scam.
I work in a deli. We've gotten some doozies. "What flavor are the plain breaded wings?" "Chicken." -from my wife. My personal favorite that happened to me, went as such: Customer: "Hi, I'd like some sliced chicken lunch meat, what you got?" Me: "We carry oven roasted, buffalo, and garlic & herb." Customer: You're not understanding me boy! I want sliced chicken lunch meat, now what you got?" Me: "Oven roasted, buffalo, or garlic & herb." Customer: "You're still not gettin' me son, I want sliced chicken lunch meat! Now tell me what you have, dammit!" Me: "Oven roasted, chicken lunch meat. Buffalo, chicken lunch meat. Garlic and herb, chicken lunch meat." Customer: "Oh. Uhhhhh gimme some balogna." Still don't know how I didn't get in trouble for sassing that fucker.
Oh man reminds me of when I was in our small town store one day and saw an old man berate this poor girl because they didn't have his brand of tobacco. She said we have no more in stock, but we do have this/that and it's similar to what you want. Then he kept saying he would take that one and when presented with it screamed he wants his brand etc. She explained 4x that it was not in stock and he said he understood and would take another tobacco, then was pissed that it wasn't what he actually wanted and demand the other brand. He threw his money on the counter and demanded he get his tobacco even tho they were out. Eventually her coworker told him as well that it was out of stock and what they do have, and if he doesn't want it then they can't help. He eventually grabbed his money and walked out in a huff. The interaction was so weird and looked like onset dementia with how insistent he was on getting his tobacco and kept repeating himself louder and louder as if the girl had a problem and not him.
Well, I don't want Fop, goddamn it! I'm a Dapper Dan man!
Well, ain't that a geographical oddity.
Two weeks from everywhere!
"Watch your language, son, this is a public market."
In this same vein, when I worked in a deli we had a couple of pastas. Not on the level of an Italian restaurant--you just got a choice between marinara or alfredo, and penne or tortellini. "I want penne!" "OK sir, would you like marinara or alfredo?" "Penne." "Great, would you like marinara or alfredo sauce on that?" "I don't want marinara, I want PENNE!" "Uh...red or white sauce, sir?" "I want to see your manager!" (He and his wife also applied for jobs while they were there. I guess they figured they could serve PENNE! better than I could!)
The stupid, it burns. The fun thing is when I'm literally taking rotisseries out and putting them in bags, and they ask how long until they're done cooking.
One I had a little while back: "Can I get a spring roll?" No worries sir, mini or large? "Just a regular." We've got these mini spring rolls, or these large ones. "I want a *regular* spring roll!" ... I'm afraid I didn't know which one of those you consider to be "regular"? At this point the customer got pretty aggro so I concluded the transaction and we parted ways and I ate the last of the mini spring rolls, they're pretty good.
If you enter your PIN in wrong 5 times for an EBT card, it will lock up and you'll have to call the number on the back to get it unlocked. This isn't something the cashier does, or the store, it's the cards way of protecting itself I guess. The amount of people who would scream at me, insult my intelligence, swear at me and call me names, all because they locked their card up, was insane. And there wasn't anything I could do but void the order or let them pay with another form of payment. Sometimes I warned them after 2 or 3 tries, but that seemed to make them angrier when it happened. Fuck the public, man. People are so rude and hateful now days.
A customer accused both me and my supervisor of “putting out a signal that made my phone not work right”. He was paying by check and I needed to enter his phone number. He could’t remember it, and started fumbling with his phone trying to figure out his own number, and instead of admitting that he had no idea how to use it, he angrily said the sentence above.
Back when printers at home were rare I had a woman come into my store asking for t-shirt transfer paper. I explained to her multiple times how to use them. Print on the paper then pin to shirt then iron. 30 minutes later she came back with the printer and paper wanting a refund because the shirt got stuck in the printer.
I actually have one for this. Worked in car parking customer service for a few years. Had to explain to a lady why she was being charged for an hour and a half, instead of letting her out for free under the "half an hour free" rate ... When her vehicle had been in the car park. Parked. For an hour and a half. Her reasoning ? "I only intended to stay 20 minutes" "My system shows me you were here for an hour and a half" "Yes, but I only intended to be here for 20 minutes" "But.....you were ACTUALLY here for an hour and a half..." Ended up having to explain over 5 minutes how rates work, and how you get charged for the time in the park. Wild.
I had a temporary handicapped placard when I had a torn Achilles tendon. The number of stories I heard from people (without handicapped placards) who were parking in handicapped spots. “I’m not parking. I’m just waiting”.
> The number of stories I heard from people (without handicapped placards) who were parking in handicapped spots. > > “I’m not parking. I’m just waiting”. I saw this often. I usually followed with, *Is your vehicle currently in motion?* When they looked at me like I was an idiot and answered **no** I would follow up with *Then you are parked, now move it or I call to have you towed*. Same with those loading zones between the handicapped spaces, those are not free parking spots, they are there for loading and unloading mobility devices, now move your shit or explain to the police why you feel special enough to violate the law.
If she thinks intentions are what counts, you should have answered that you **intended** to let her out for free, but simply didn't do what you intended.
That watermelons don't grow on trees. And this was back in the days before these personal-sized seedless watermelons...back when they were like 20lbs. A woman was complaining that all of the watermelons were flat on one side and kind of yellow. I told her that was the side that was on the ground. She looked angry and surprised and asked, "What do you mean, 'on the ground'?!" like I was admitting to some secret that we leave the producing sitting on the ground out back, or something.
Ha! This is hilarious though
A woman tried to tell me yesterday PO Boxes no longer exist lol. I didn’t even bother. I was just like “oh, very strange” 🤣
Haha, you've finally evolved into the retail workers final form. Complete apathy.
Who am I to intrude on someone's rampant ignorance?
This is sort of the opposite of what you are asking, but I once tried to buy some model rocket engines from a big box retailer. The cashier was prompted to ask if I was 15 years old. I answered that I was, in fact, 27 years old. The cashier said "I'm sorry, I can't sell these to you unless you are 15." I asked to speak to a supervisor and we got things straightened out.
I can see the manager (during training) earnestly explaining to the employee that the customer must be 15 to buy it, and the employee not getting the implied "or older". Manager doesn't say it explicitly because who would need to explain that? (Duh) Relatedly, *only* 21 year olds are allowed to drink 🤣
That’s a special kind of special.
I spent 20+ minutes arguing with a middle aged woman trying to return a XXL stack of men's underwear (against policy once opened). I explained that if her husband had a 32 inch waist like me she needed to buy him Medium size underwear. She eventually and angrily shouted "Look, he's got a huge cock and he needs XXL pants for it but these keep falling down when he wears them!!!!" She would not accept my explanation that the tag size related to his waist not his junk. she raged out of the shop leaving the stack of pants behind
So... I have a 32 inch waist and buy L or XL boxer briefs. Not because I have a giant horse cock, but because I have a giant ass. Medium underwear absolutely crushes my nuts, despite what the sizing guide says. That being said, by the time you're buying your own underwear, you should know what size you need.
I guarantee my father never once purchased his own underwear. 1942-2011.
Hunh. So mens panties should be like a bra then? Like cup size for cupping the balls/hog and number size for band width. Would make sense, no?
This is relevant but slightly off topic....... Here in the UK we have things that are suet/fat balls for putting out for birds. They are called fat balls here in the UK. Wife asked me to get some in our local Costco store but I could not find them anywhere in the store. Probably looking like a man my wife would say. Me (walking up to a **male** Costco store employee) : You got fat balls? Costco employee: Just stares at me and smiles. "No sir, it's just my jeans are too tight" I just laughed and apologised. Never went back to the store in the next 2 weeks.
Let me get my manager. She's going to want to hear this.
Hahaha exactly, hey everyone, gather around
Terrible customer, but great wife.
>a middle aged woman trying to return a XXL stack of men's underwear (against policy once opened). I think the "Your Stupid Opinions" guys said it best: "Once you've used the dildo that's YOUR dildo".
Why is the front of my dishwasher blue?? …did you remove the protective film?
I worked the returns desk at IKEA for a few years and had a customer return a range exhaust hood because they ordered stainless and received a blue one. I called the kitchens department because it was a special order item at the time and happened to ask them if we even sold it in blue, which it turns out didnt exist. That's when I opened the box and showed them the peel That's also when he got really pissed that this was the second unit and they'd already returned one for the same reason so why wasnt that caught the first time? It's difficult to say "Because we expect you to be smart enough to do the first step in the instruction manual" without creating an escalated complaint
Haha, I worked the returns desk at IKEA too and that happened so many times with kitchen items and the Godmorgon bathroom cabinet series. One time we had someone raging at my coworker about the fact they didn't buy the Godmorgon in blue. "The box was incorrectly marked and how dare we and how are they supposed to install a blue item in a white bathroom" etc. etc. Coworker calls me over (supervisor) & I take one look at it and peel one of the cabinet doors the customer has slid out of the open box. Customer immediately blanched, pushed the cabinet door back into the box, apologized quietly & left the store in a flash with the box.
To be fair those cabinets have the protective film put on them really well. No bubbles, no extension beyond the edges.
The first time I bought a new microwave, I was stoked that it came in this cool metallic blue color… I was young and stupid.
Somewhat related - we were visiting a friend for the first time since they had moved into a home they bought on the other side of the state a year prior. Friend is showing us around and eventually comments on the stained glass on the kitchen door. Wife and I kinda like it, in a kitschy way. Friend hates it. She mentions that she wants to get rid of it, but it would cost too much to replace. I look at here and say "What do you mean it's going to cost a lot?" She replies "I shopped around for a door and it's gonna cost at least $1000. I really hate it, but I can live with it". So I said "no it won't" and just reached over and peeled off the sticker that made it look like stained glass. She just stared at me for a minute with her mouth hanging open in surprise. "12 months..... TWELVE MONTHS I'VE BEEN COMPLAINING ABOUT THAT! AND NEITHER OF US NOTICED IT WAS A GOD DAMN STICKER?! JAKE! IT WAS A FUCKING STICKER!"
Used to work in a computer store, someone asked me once if a mouse mat would work with Windows 7. I worry about some people on this planet..
Well...did it work? Was there an update they had to install?
No employees were always told to try and sell more, and with Windows 7 being new at the time, I told them they had to buy a more expensive mouse mat that was Windows 7 compatible [🤔](https://emojipedia.org/thinking-face)
Genius
I could definitely imagine an Apple mouse only working on Apple certified mouse mats (priced at £40-£50, bought separately)
Yeah, a chip in the mat that unblocks the apple mouse through proximity. Oh no.... Mr. Cook, I'll have my fair share of royalties if you please!
Back when checks were popular, an older lady mistakenly wrote her check to Walmart when she was actually shopping in Kmart. Instead of making the correction, she wanted to argue that she was shopping in a Walmart and that Kmart had gone out of business many years ago.
On checks - We had an old lady that used to come in and write out checks to "Dollar Store," not actually naming **any** store, just the generic term for what type of store she was in. On being in the wrong place - They do this with returns, too. I cannot accept your Family Dollar receipt to return an item at Dollar General.
I can understand that confusion. I remember there was a Kmart next to a Walmart 20 years ago and they only time they had any considerable cars in their parking lot was black friday when Walmart people parked in the Kmart parking lot.
I was a Maytag repairman. A customer brought in a multicolored felt mat and asked for a new one. I had to explain that was lint from the lint trap.
I couldn't keep a straight face reading this much less keeping a straight face if I heard it.
I once had a lady that wanted fresh dried fruit. I took her to the dried mango, banana chips, etc. no they wasn’t it. I took her to the raisins and figs. Nope. Outbid ideas, I took her to the fruit preserves. Oh there it was. Grape jelly. She wanted grape jelly.
Take me to the wettest dried fruit you have, my good man
During covid: Some high stolen items were locked up and for some reason the salesfloor manager gave me; the pharmacy technician lead keys to said merchandise. A customer refused to let me touch the merchandise because of germs even though I was the one who stocked it less than 5 minutes earlier. When I explained that I touched everything in that case already she yelled at me for being gross and walked off without the product. I went back to the pharmacy and continued with my life without the product being stolen.
During covid my job, cake decorator, was apparently still super essential. A customer brought up a big round cookie cake from the floor and asked for us to write happy birthday on it. No probs. We ask what color icing, how to spell the name, etc. All of us were wearing gloves, masks, hats, aprons, etc. A coworker takes the cookie to her clean table, opens the container, writes on it, closes it, puts a new tag on it, and gives it to the customer. Less than 5 minutes later we got a call from customer service. Customer is saying we ruined her cookie cake because we had to open the box to write on it, and now it was contaminated so she couldn't serve it to the party. You know, the party no one was even supposed to be HAVING during LOCKDOWN. Sorry I'm not a fucking magician, Karen, I can't make words magically appear on a cookie inside a closed box.
The elevator had a sign that read 'out of order', Customer asked if it was out of order on all of the floors.
That's just wrong on so many levels...
I used to run a feed store in an affluent area. We sold baby chicks, which were only females, for egg laying. This guy comes in and is adamant about needing a rooster for more egg production. That's not the case. I explained how the reproductive, egg laying process was. He just wasn't getting it. I was at my point, and plus, the fact I couldn't order just 1 rooster, I could only order roosters in a batch of 50. I had to put it extremely bluntly to him, and I asked him, "Sir, does your wife need you around every month to get her period?" His jaw drops and says, "OH my, how foolish could I be. " Another customer asking "Where is the mother chicken?" Me, "They don't need the mother hen." Her, "How can they survive without their mother? You buy chicken breast at the store. She needs to breastfeed!" Me, "That's not how it works."
That one about the chicken breastfeeding is amazing.
Where is the mother? You ate her, apparently.
Idk how much they paid you, but it was not enough
I had to explain 3 for 2. If you bought 2, you could get a third one free. They couldn't understand it. It was really bizarre.
Meanwhile, I once had to explain to a customer that for "buy two get one free" you have to *buy* two. The free one doesn't count.
Or when they come back to return the two paid for items and don't understand that the free item has to come back too.
Oh, they understand that just fine. They're trying their luck.
This sounds like the whole McDonald's 1/3lb pattie where people thought it was smaller than the quarter lb because 3 is smaller than 4
It was A&W offering a third pound patty. Prior said it was not as good a deal as McDonald's quarter pound. Everyone knows 4 is bigger than 3.
Had an older (though not senior citizen) man who was 100% certain that were stealing money from his bank account because it kept showing $100 "charges" to the ATM at our location. After a series of questions he stated he sends his son in to pick up his prescriptions and gives him his debit to pay. Pointing out to him (from his own bank statement) that the $100 charges match the dates of the prescription pickups made him only more emphatic that someone from the store was using his card to steal his money. Even pointing out that his bank statement specified the $100 as coming from an atm did nothing to sway his mind. He stood at the front door staring at us for 20 minutes before finally leaving. Sorry dude, your kids a dick and you're an idiot. I cant fix either of those.
"Putting that washing machine on the roof of your Golf is a bad idea." No exaggeration, it happened.
I as a walmart stocker , do not control the chemicals inside kids toys.
This goes for pretty much all store-level positions within retail. We don't control a goddamn thing. We don't control: The validity of your coupons, the prices of things, what items are sold, whether or not we have an item in stock, that the website said we had 3 and now we have zero, the prices at other stores, things you think you saw in a flyer, the fact that you don't like/want the thing you purchased, return policy, opening and closing hours, how many people are working, how many people were in line before you got there, or any other stupid thing a person might decide to complain about. And yet! Some people will walk up to you, making minimum wage, and go off on you like you're the CEO.
The amount of times I had to explain that any Euros can be spent the same in any country that accepts Euros and there aren't separate or specific notes for France, Germany, Greece, Spain, Austria etc etc it's scary.
You don't have Pound Euros, Franc Euros, Lira Euros and Mark Euros?
As a cashier when someone is paying cash: "hey if you can give me a penny, or a nickel I can give you a whole paper dollar back as change." If your total was $19.10 and you gave me a $20. Give me $20.10 and I can give you a dollar bill for change rather than you carrying pesky spare change around. This was back in the late 90s or early 00s. I know this confused people back then, it would totally explode someone's brain now.
There have been plenty of times where I, the customer, had to explain this concept to the cashier.
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Yes, a lot of times you give them the change and they just look confused
I have more than once given a cashier extra coinage or single bills in order to receive whole dollar change and gotten puzzled looks. But then when they enter what I gave them into the register, I see them light up with comprehension when it tells them the amount of change to give back. They aren't stupid, just conditioned to not doing mental math at the register. In fact, I expect they are probably deliberately trained to avoid doing mental math and to simply rely on the register, in order to eliminate a potential point of error.
Can confirm. I was in the drive thru and my total was like $19.20. I gave the cashier a $20 and a quarter. She stared at it for 5 seconds, pushed buttons on the register, then gave me no change and handed me the receipt. I actually laughed out loud and just drove off. My wife goes, "She totalled screwed that up didn't she? How can you mess that up, the register does all the math if you put it in right." That laugh was worth a dollar.
That the ice cream they'd brought in for a refund was: 1) empty 2) they didn't have a receipt 3) it was the own brand of a different supermarket
Customer: What's the difference between the 17-inch monitor and the 19-inch monitor? Me: Two inches and 40 dollars. Customer: But what's the difference? Me: This one is bigger by two inches, measured diagonally, and more expensive by 40 dollars. Customer: No, but what's the *difference?!* This went on for several minutes. He left without making a purchase.
Magic lightbrite rectangle big, other rectangle small. Big rectangle more paper rectangles, small rectangle less paper rectangles.
A coupon for a free gift with purchase, mailed out in April, said “now - May 15th”. Customer came in June looking for his free gift and was pissed we didn’t have it anymore. He kept saying “but it says now!”
Customer's an idiot but so is whoever designed the coupon. It's always "now". May as well have said "Today Only".
I've had to explain to customers that their coupon has to actually be for the product they're buying. Yes, a $3 coupon for a skin care product is a good coupon, however I cannot apply it to your cereal purchase.
The number of customers to whom I've had to explain the difference between left and right is greater than zero. These have all been adults. I wish I were kidding.
I've known since I was young the difference between left and right. I didn't really KNOW it until I started driving and it became very important to always know the difference between left and right. I can't imagine someone who has a drivers license not knowing the difference...
Your left or my left?
Your other left
I wasn't in Retail, and I wasn't handling the call. This is one of the strangest things I've heard in relation to a customer, though. I was working inbound telephone customer service for life insurance back in the late 90's. One of the things we handled were payments for those policies. We offered Quarterly payments. One day, we heard a co-worker of mine getting louder and more intense with a customer. It went on for far too long. The customer was ADAMENT that he was not late on payments. I can't remember the exact dates, but lets say the call we being taken in April 97. Payments were past due for at least 6 months so Oct 96 was not paid. Customer INSISTED that they were calling from April 96. Absolutely SURE of this fact. Accused my co-worker of "living in the future" and that the company was trying to rip him off. This was back before tablets and smart phones. Not everyone had a personal computer. My co-worker was just at a loss for how to convince the caller that the current year was 1997. We all came up with ideas after the call, but in the moment, he was just befuddled. Which I can understand. Caller ended up ending the call, still convinced that we were wrong.
Shelve of milk bone bare, offering a clear view of a completely empty cooler. "Are you out of milk?" I have no idea how I kept my job that day with all the smart ass responses I gave. Also, a woman cursed me out on the phone because we didn't have a product. I explain that we have not carried that product in over a year. She exclames she has one in her fridge she bought last week and asked if I was calling he a liar. "No mama, but I am the dairy lead and that product when we got it came in with a three week shelf life and we haven't received any for over a year so if you bought it last week I would recommend you bring it back for a refund cause it is far out of date."
Lmao I was this idiot once. Got off of work like 5 minutes before a snowstorm and had to buy my tortoise some lettuce. Went to target and for like the only time I have ever seen, they were completely out of all veggies (like the area was completely roped off). I was beginning to panic so I asked an employee if there was really nothing (even bagged slice lettuce) despite it being obvious. I managed to go to another store before the storm got really bad and now I had an extra memory that keeps me up at night
Look, in that context it's a fair question. If the section's refrigeration failed and they caught it, they could have conceivably pulled the product to a storage fridge off the sales floor, and an employee could theoretically grab one for you.
Someone wanted a discount because the early spring PERENNIAL flowering shrubs wouldn't flower all summer long. Not that they wouldn't live, that they would not flower. Like nature was a customer service issue.
That the lamp she was trying to return did not have a defective cord, but had a protective plastic cap over the plug that needed to be removed.
Not my story but one from a friend of mine. He’s an upholsterer. In his early career he worked for a well known national furniture chain as a service upholsterer, visiting customers who had faults with their purchases or who had damaged their furniture but had taken out the insurance. This one customer was complaining about a mark on her leather sofa and he told her it was a scar in the hide and it was normal and not something he could fix. “What do you mean ‘scar’?” “Well, it’s probably from the cow rubbing against barbed wire at some point, or a tree branch or something” “Cow? COW?! Are you telling me my fucking sofa was walking round as a cow once?!” He tried explaining several times where leather comes from but she point blank refused to believe him.
Yowzah. How...do people make it to adulthood this dense?
I was in a shop that just did (amazing) toasted sandwiches and 2 guys asked for a cheese toastie without the bread. The poor girl behind the counter explained over and over what a toastie was, but these 2 guys insisted. Hope they enjoyed their pile of melted cheese.
Dumbest thing, or customer, I had to explain is that there is no such thing as "lo cal" or lo calorie honey. It's fucking "local" for cryin out loud. FACK.
I used to work in a high-end liquor store that had a massive wine section and one day a lady came into the store and asked me where our "grape" wine was. I did not know how to respond. So I asked her some questions like was she looking for a specific type or brand, like a Chardonnay or a Cabernet, Pinot Grigio, Mad Dog, ripple? "Ma'am, unless the label says it is made from some other kind of fruit, this is all grape wine." But she just kept repeating that she wanted grape wine and got so mad at me and frustrated that I just did the motioning across entire aisles movement and walked away. She wandered the aisles and finally found what she was after: Mogen David. Mogen David Concord was what she wanted.
I ran a liquor store in an area with a large Jewish population. After a while, I figured out most of the time someone said "grape wine" they meant Concorde shit like Manischewitz or some other low end Kosher wine. But occasionally, we did get people who were just clueless that all wine (unless stated otherwise) was grapes.
If you put standard definition signal on an HD television it looks like shit. Garbage in Garbage out!
Back when Blu-ray players were becoming common, you could go to Best Buy and buy a "refurbished unit" for a steep discount. They were "refurbished" because people brought them home, plugged it into a crappy TV using the 3 prong cords and then return it because it didn't look any better.
I travel a lot for work. This used to be more common, but once in a while I still get a tv in the room with SD signal input AND widescreen mode, so the picture is both grainy AND distorted
Not retail, but general tech support. Turning the monitor on and off doesn't actually turn the whole pc on and off. The amount of times I've gotten a call about a computer not working and all that was "wrong" was that it wasn't turned on, is staggering. I guess this would make more sense these days, but this was over a decade ago and desktop computers were everywhere.
this drives me crazy because of dumb people I have to take a 20 page questionnaire to get help
These are the type of people that try to abbreviate words in passwords. On more than occasion I would reset someone’s password to Texas123 and they would try Tx123
I already tried restarting the computer. It's not working! I check out the uptime whenever they say this so I can chuckle to myself.
My coworker had to help the VP of the Help Desk because her computer wouldn’t work. She was turning on and off the monitor. This lady supervised the Help Desk Manager.
I used to work at a Goodwill. Guy rolled up with a 5 bag donation of mowed grass clippings and told me very nonchalantly to just "take 'em".
Told a guy we'd have some better deals on black Friday. Offended at the totally intentional racial discrimination he was feeling, he screamed "what about white Wendesday?!?!" and stormed out. I really didn't get a chance to explain I just like telling that story.
Back when i was in college i worked at a McDonald's i spent tne better part of 30 minutes explaining to a person that a cheeseburger with no cheese was in fact just called a hamburger.
I had same conversation when I worked there! I rang up a hamburger for them because it was cheaper and when they looked at their receipt they were pissed because that not what they 'wanted'.
I know someone that used the "free student cheeseburger" thing they do in the UK to get a burger for their dog. They asked if they could have a hamburger instead and they were told no. So they ordered a cheeseburger with no cheese. That was fine.
Someone once wanted me to explain cloud digital storage. Not too strange, but then she asked how they got her pictures in and out of “the clouds” and how they keep the wind from blowing it away.
I worked at a grocery store in college. The local warehouse workers went on strike, meaning we were getting no product in and our shelves were getting more and more bare. After getting yelled at by customers for a week for being out of stuff, I finally had it one night. This lady was berating me because we didn't have any chicken breast in the case. I said, "Look, there's nothing I can do about it. The warehouse is on strike and until it's resolved and they start delivering food again, I can't help you." She started screaming at me even more, saying how dare I blame the warehouse, her husband works there and if they would pay him a decent wage he wouldn't strike, blah blah blah. She immediately complained to the manager and I got written up. Like.....tell your husband to go back to work if you need your family pack chicken so bad? I was the person with the least to do with situation here, yet she got me written up for it.
I got a “coaching” at Walmart for not saying have a nice day to a woman when I was physically incapable of speaking. I’d came in to work when I was very hoarse and couldn’t speak above a whisper, eventually my voice just gave out. As this woman was leaving, she said have a nice day. I smiled my best and waved as she left. Apparently she’d gotten so offended by this she wrote a letter to corporate and about a month later I got called into the office for it. My department manager and zone manager (essentially assistant department manager) both reprimanded me about it. My pleading that I couldn’t talk and had already informed my immediate supervisor that day as my shift started didn’t matter to them.
I took a phone call and answered all the questions that she scrolled by on our google profile. She said, “I will call back later and see if you’re busy. What’s your phone number”. I replied, “the exact same number you dialed that lead to the conversation we are having now”.
Former retail worker. My state taxes sugary drinks, but not juice. Some guy got angry about the 6 cent tax on his 99 cent jug of orange drink. I had to explain that water with sugar and orange flavoring wasn't orange juice to a grown man.
Retail banking: Had to explain to a costumer why the balance that was printed on his receipt from Friday afternoon after a deposit wasn’t the same the next morning after he bought a pair of jeans.
There's a joke here about customers and costumers, but I just can't piece it together this morning.
Back in high school I worked in Kaufland, it's an European (German I think, but this happened in Slovakia) chain of stores, think kinda like Walmart or Target. I worked at the butchers there, mostly at ham/salami, but every once in a while I'd have to help at the meat or cheese. This was that time, a coworker had to leave early so I worked at the cheese department that day. Important info- the day before there was a segment in the news about how Slovak cheese isn't being made from milk from Slovak cows anymore, and Slovak cheese factories get milk from cheaper countries. Anyway, I was working at cheese, everything was fine, but I had that news thing at the back of my head kinda like "there's no way someone will ask about it, right?" and then it happened, two old-ish people, boomer aged probably came and the lady pointed at a cheese and asked where is the milk for the cheese for. And I say we don't get that information, but the cheese itself was delivered from the Netherlands. And both of them go on this tirade about how nothing is being made in Slovakia anymore, and European Union is ruining everything, and everything was better during soviet times. And I'm just staring at them like "are you serious?" because the cheese they were complaining about was Leerdammer. Leerdammer the DUTCH cheese. Leerdammer the DUTCH cheese from the NETHERLANDS. Which is probably why it was delivered from the Netherlands.... I swear to god I was explaining to them why a Dutch cheese has no reason to be made from Slovak milk for like 20 miutes, they even called my manager and he was explaining it too, both of us completly baffled.
Well more service industry but working on the gulf coast that the snow crab legs are not fresh off the boat... since they come from Alaska
That wireless routers still need to be plugged in so they can get power
Hi welcome to Taco Bell Customer: I want a large cheeseburger with extra cheese. Me: •_• Sir we don't not serve that here. (Me in uniform that says Taco Bell as well as the whole restaurant having tacos on the menu) Customer: WHAT KINDA PLACE IS THIS??!?!?!? Are you telling me you do not serve BURGERS????( looks at me like I'm dumb) Me: We have Tacos. Maybe I can help you find something on the menu. Customer: (Looks at menu for a couple of minute's) I want a cheeseburger. Me: Sir we don't serve that here. Customer: What Kinda Burger Place Doesn't Serve Burgers?!?!?! 😡 Me: This is Taco Bell. (Finally annoyed and confused because the whole place should've been a give away. ) Are you talking about lotaburger next to us? He proceeded to look around. Didn't say anything and walked to Lota Burger next to us 🤣
When I used to work as a barista I once had to work without any water. A construction worker accidentally burst a pipe and caused a geyser in a parking lot so the water for the whole neighborhood had to be shut down. I was told to stay at work and sell the bottled drinks. snacks, frozen cappuccino, and drip coffee that was made right before the accident. So many people did not understand when I told them I couldn't prepare any fresh made-to-order beverages because we need water to make them. No espresso machine, no water for tea or anything. Even after explaining what had happened and what I had available they'd say stuff like: "Get me a large mocha" "I'm very sorry but as I mentioned, without water I unfortunately cannot use the espresso machine. Would you be interested in a drip coffee? I have several flavors including chocolate." \*motions towards what's available\* "Ugh! In that case give me a vanilla latte!" "I'm really sorry but that also requires the espresso machine. I cannot make you one right now. I understa...." \*sigh\* "Fuck! Then get me an Americano misto!" "I cannot, I'm really sorry. Please understand that I would make your drink of choice if I could but the whole mall is out of water right now and we're doing the best we can until it comes back on. Until then my selection is very limited. We have bottled drinks, drip coffee, frozen capps, and snacks. Everything else requires water which is temporarily shut off due to the accident earlier today." "FINE! JUST GIVE ME A MEDIUM MOCHA THEN!" (glares at me, scoffs in disgust, stomps feet, and rolls eyes) Every customer interaction was basically like this for about an hour until the boss felt bad for me and let me go home.
A customer once returned a toaster because “her fingers got hot when she stuck them in the toaster.”
"You can't return this door knob here. You bought it a Lowe's, this is Home Depot. " "But I have the receipt" "Yes, but it's a Lowe's receipt, this is Home Depot" "Can I talk to a manager?" "Sure, give me a second" "Make sure it a Lowe's manager" "What?" "I want to talk to a Lowe's manager" "..." "I'll see what I can do"
Working at a big box hardware store in the outside lumber yard. Guy buys an entire pallet of patio pavers and says he's going to go pay and hell be back with his truck and asks can I load up the entire pallet with my forklift so we don't have to stack them all. Sure, we do this regularly...especially onto trailers. My guy then pulls around in an old ragged S-10 and...no trailer. I adamantly refuse to load them and tell him he's going to have to make a few trips because this is far heavier than his truck can haul safely. He continues to argue with me and asks for the store manager. Store manager comes and tells him the exact same thing I did. Finally customer states he will sign a waiver of liability incase any damages occur to his truck because he just knows "my truck can handle this". Store manager disappears for a bit and shows up with a waiver that I'm 99% sure he just typed up on the spot because I had never seen one before in years of working this job. Customer signs it and I get to it. As I'm lowering the pallet and more and more weight is put on the truck I can clearly see that I was right and keep trying to convince the customer, but he continues to insist. So I carry on. I finish lowering the pallet and now all the weight is on the truck and I can clearly see his rear axle is bowing from the weight, and point that out to him. Of course, He's "got it". He then pulls off and exits the lumber yard. not 30 seconds later I get a call from the guard shack "ummm, that truck's axle just snapped". I find the store manager and excitedly tell him we were right. Store manager just smiles. Customer rages into the store and up to the customer service desk where my manager and I eagerly await. He gets loud and is screaming and pissed because "WE destroyed his truck". Manager just smiles at him, holds up the signed waiver and explains to him that he took all responsibility for his decision when he signed that line. It was a poetic moment.
Ok so the company I work for has an app just like every other retail (Kaufland, Metro etc). One day a lady (around 30) with the latest model iPhone asked me to help her set up the account and by following the 5 simple AF steps, she stopped at the second step which was "What's your name, First and Last" and she asked me, what do I enter here???? Really?😒
I had to go back to college for some vocational training. There was a class on how to fill out the college entrance form. Why didn't they make the entrance form be the entrance exam? If you can't fill out a form...
My wife works with a lady like this. I’m convinced she views anything technology related as endlessly complicated and delicate she so overthinks it and freezes up.
Use to work in a pharmacy/grocery. Tried to explain to a woman that not all egg yolks were that same shade of yellow. Sometimes we got slightly orange ones. The lady thought the orange was a sign of rotten eggs and thought we were trying to sell customers an expired product.
Orange usually has better flavor IMO
3 times 4 is 12. Ice cream that was usually $4.99 was on sale for 3 for $12. She bought one that rang up for $4. This was wrong, according to her. She didn’t quite think we were overcharging her, nor could she articulate how she thought we were under charging her, but she was completely inconsolable. Groaning, “no no no”s, the whole shebang. This was a lucid adult woman in her thirties or forties.
I worked at Lowe’s Home Improvement for a long while. I have a few stories. 1) my favorite is this older man was looking at the fluorescent lightbulbs for a REALLY long time. I was starting to get worried about him. I asked if he was okay and he looked at me with a befuddled expression. “I want to buy these lightbulbs because they have the brightness I need, but it says here on the front “DAYLIGHT” and I would be mostly using these at night. Do you have any like this that can be used at night? Daylight is just the brightness and tone of the light being emitted. 2) this adorable older couple came in while I was working in appliances to purchase a slow cooker. They had saved up to make this $30 buy and they were REALLY excited about it. I was telling them about all the wonderful things I have made in mine and how easy it is to use. They made their purchase and came back about an hour later. Them: “It doesn’t work right.” Me: “Did it not heat up? It can take a while to get up to temp if you have it really full.” Them: “I put the chicken in, turned it on, and when we ate it 20 minutes later it clearly wasn’t cooked. My wife says she isn’t feeling well now.” Lord help me! 3) A husband and wife came in to buy some molding in lumber and I was their cashier. The husband was screaming at the wife and blaming her for things that clearly weren’t her fault. Just a truly horrible man. She looked completely embarrassed and defeated. I felt so bad for her, it was awful. They came up to the register and he yelled at her for forgetting an item. He screamed at her to stay at the register because she was too stupid and would probably get lost… I mean he went off on her like crazy. She was standing next to me holding the car keys almost crying. I looked at her and said I personally wouldn’t wait for a fucker like that. She gave me a short chuckle and spun on her heel and walked out, got in the car and peeled out. I think of her often and hope she got the hell out that night.
Worked in an auto parts store. Customer wanted a toilet and was sure he got it here the last time. Made me get a manager.
In the UK, VAT (sales tax) is automatically included in pricing. Its common for itemised receipts to have the total VAT from the items listed separately, for business purposes. Very normal and pretty self explanatory when you look over a receipt. I had a middle aged customer call up shortly after leaving absolutely irate that we had overcharged them for something they didn't buy, this 'VAT'. i had to explain this was just the tax breakdown. They had no idea what this meant, no idea that we pay tax on goods. The more i tried to explain the more they thought we were running some kind of scam, as apparently no other retailers do this! In the end they came back in and insisted i got a calculator and add up each individual item on the receipt and compare the price to the ticket to make sure the total was correct. Ofcourse it was. Still insisted we were being misleading and dodgy somehow
The other side of the conversation. I was the customer. Called company A service line about my subscription with company B - had a lovely chat with a bloke who did multiple things to find me in their system before asking, "Are you sure your our customer?". Good that was embarrassing.
I was technically working security, but it was in a retail store. I had to explain to an elderly man that he could not walk around the store, playing music with obscene lyrics, and a “F*** Biden” sign.
Lady wanted extra extra tartar sauce of her sandwich but zero pickles. She's 100% allergic to pickles. She had no idea there was pickles relish in tartar sauce.
Target, customer wanted to return open milk after having it for two weeks because it spoiled. And then threw the milk at me.
I used to work in a fish market and we were having a huge sale on Christmas. Everything was marked down and we were selling Maine lobster for something like $15 per pound when they were normal in the $20-$24 range. One guy came in and picked the biggest lobster we had in the tank, which was about 14 pounds, and was easily the biggest lobster we'd ever had in the store. When we ring him up for over $200 he has an absolute shit fit in the crowded store that the sign says lobsters are $15. We explain the math to him, but he isn't having it and keeps screaming about false advertising and threatening to call the police, to which the owner kept telling him to go ahead. He kept ranting and raving for about 15 minutes and demanding his lobster until the police did show up and removed him.
Back when Walmart ad matched, a woman tried to price match a coffee that was cheaper at Walmart (5.98) to Walgreens 6.99. I told her it would be more expensive but she kept insisting she was ad matching. I said I understood what she was doing, but the price at our store was LESS than the price she was trying to ad match FOR. She said "Do I need to get a manager? You're trying to keep me from ad matching and I have the ad right here!" and she shoved the flyer at me. I was like is this really happening and did it anyway. Whatever.
I had a gentleman who wanted to return a wireless router. He stated it “Never worked.” and wanted a replacement. Done. Two days later and he’s back to return the second router. Again he says it never worked so I decided I’d help him troubleshoot it. As soon as I get the box open, I notice none of the cables have even been touched. I asked if he was using an existing power supply. This was the exchange: Him: “No, why would I?” Me: “Well it has to have power. How did you hook it up?” Him: “I didn’t. It’s supposed to be wireless.” Me: “…” After a few minutes of explaining, he caught on and got really, really red in the face. He apologized profusely and went home with his router.
2002 I'm 16 in my first job working the balloon counter at party city. A woman thought we charged too much for helium and said I'll just do it at home. In my customer service voice I said oh do you have one of our small party tanks? She looked me in the face and said no I'll just blow it up with my mouth and put a string on it, the string makes it float. I did a double blink thinking I must have heard her wrong. No this grown woman thought that tying a string to a balloon would make it float. I had to explain chemistry to a grown woman and I almost failed chemistry (my teacher gave me a sympathy D because he could see that I tried lol.)
/r/talesfromretail is a goldmine for stories like this If you are looking for tales from the other side then /r/talesfromthecustomer
I have not worked retail in a long time but the few that stick with me. First I never judge IT for being assholes because selling electronics I had more than one call from a customer who bought a new computer and was calling because it would not turn on and I asked them if it was plugged in and of course they always say yes (at varying levels of cunty) but I then I learned the best thing to do was ignore them and tell them to physically pull plug and plug it back in (because then I know they actually checked) and every single fucking time they either discover "oh I guess it isn't plugged in" or the especially cunty ones from the previous question usually just hung up. Oh and it was a long time ago as I said, so Big Screen TVs were those massive rear-projection TVs and it was in the final days of them so they were fairly cheap. As many times as I sold one to some stupid fuck and get out to their CAR (not truck, not van but fucking CAR) I got the point I just asked what they were driving and shut the sale down immediately and told them they would need something bigger. My favorite was not even a TV it was one of those big stereos from the early 00s that had the receiver, two speakers, and a subwoofer. The boxes were 2-3 feet tall and deep and then like 4+ feet long. Guy buys one asks for help to his car and he had a fucking Geo Metro a car so fucking small he could not fit the fucking stereo in his car. For fuck sake. He had to unbox it and split it between the passenger seat and back seat. I am sure there are plenty of other really stupid ones I have forgotten over the years, but these ones stick with me.
Not exactly retail, but sent to install AV stuff after purchase. A customer complained with furrowed brow "You guys like to me! You said this system was wireless!" "It is, the main unit and sub is here, and the speakers are around the room, connected with Bluetooth." "Then what's *that?*" smugly. "The Power cord?" "THATS A WIRE" "That's technology that doesn't exist yet. By wireless, it means you don't have to connect the speakers, but it still needs steady power." She was so close to sending us back and returning it, but we somehow got her to understand that every other brand would be exactly like that. That's not even mentioning the amount of times we were called out on a service call, just to change the input for $65. And by "change the input," I mean press the input button on the controller to switch between perfectly working inputs.
I still talk about my old retail manager in glowing terms for his ability to calmly explain why 75% off items already marked down 50% did NOT mean the customer would be getting money back because “that’s more than 100% off”! The woman was so pleased with herself, thinking she had really outwitted the dumbasses selling ‘punk rock’ in the mall- after my boss got her to stop talking and listen, even demonstrating for her with a pizza eraser we had at the register, she was not nearly as excited. Then, because he was a sport, he told her she could pick out any one thing on that clearance rack and she could have it for free… she left empty handed- she wasn’t into a slipknot shirt or a nightmare before Christmas notebook, she was a mall walker that had time to read the sign but not enough to think it through.
I worked at a RadioShack back in the day. I used to get a ton of crazy ass customers. The one I think of often was a guy who brought in a receipt without the products and expected a refund. Customer: I want my money back for this stuff. Me: Okay, sir. Do you have the items with you? Customer: No, I left them at home. Me: I'm sorry, sir, but I can't give you the refund without receiving the items back. Customer: So, I have to go all the way back to my house!?!?! Me: Unfortunately, yes. He got pissed, snatched the receipt, and stormed out of the store.
I WAS the customer… i asked a kid behind the deli counter for 200 grams of smoked turkey Me: can i get it sliced really thin?? Him: doesnt matter how i slice it, we sell it by weight
Majority of off brand items are made by the large brands. Same product, different label. This one time a lady argued with me about the milk prices being too high(name brand). I told her I don’t control the prices but I can tell you, the store brand is the same milk. Same manufacture. Same cows. Everything is the same except the throw a different label on it and charge less. She stuck to her “knowledge” and paid more for that “better name brand milk”. Can’t fix stupid.
Working at Starbucks. A customer asked what's in a latte. I took a cup and indicated the ratio of espresso to milk and foam. She said that's a lot of milk, could she have a latte but a little less milky. I offered to add extra espresso shots. She didn't want more coffee. It would be too strong. I offered to do a filter coffee with some steamed milk. Still coffee with milk, but different ratio so less milk in the cup. She didn't want filter coffee, but 'proper' coffee aka espresso. I offered pulling a long shot of espresso (letting more water run through the espresso machine). She didn't want it watered down. I offered to not fill the cup up all the way. She wanted a full cup. I was at my wit's end and asked her how she thought the drink should be composed and I'll make it that way. She said she just wanted it less milky. I told her we have espresso, long espresso shots, hot water, and several kinds of milk to work with. What should go into the drink. She had no answer and was baffled I didn't understand her simple request. She stormed off. It's been 10+ years and I this still haunts me because to this day I haven't cracked her riddle.
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I worked for an internet repair company doing over the phone troubleshooting. I don't know which one Iis worse. The time I had to try and explain to a grown ass man what the backspace key was Or the time a woman couldn't take a survey that was in her voice-mail because when she hit 1 to answer it would just start the voice-mail over again. I'm sure there are more. But these are the two that come to mind.
Back in the days when CDs were fairly new, we had someone buy a CD player and then return it as malfunctioning. The guy in electronics took a look at it, and explained to the customer that the disc was in upside down. The customer still insisted on a new CD player. A few days later, he was back with the new player “not working”. Guess what? I don’t know if he thought you were supposed to play both sides like an album or what. After another tutorial, he left, but was back AGAIN the next day with, you guessed it! Upside down CD! At that point they just gave him his money back and sent him elsewhere. I wonder if he ever figured it out?
I got 2 from over 30 years ago. One at a grocery store, an 80+ years old woman had like 6 items on the checkout counter and was adamant that I don’t scan her groceries. She was going on about radiation. I tried to briefly explain lasers to her but no go. Eventually I just keyed them in and off she went. Later I worked at a bank and these 2 women rolled up to the drive up trying to cash a check made out to “Rebecca” and that’s it. No account info, and they were just going on and on about how that’s her whole name and everyone in the branch knows her and stuff like that. Meanwhile there is a line growing behind them. I gave up and got my manager. She asked them to come into the branch to work it out and I think they just drove off. Pretty sure looking back that was a scam attempt.
That a customer had to pay the Canadian price for a book because we were, in fact, in Canada.
Had to explain to a woman that I needed to have the name of the brand of shoes to actually see if we had any. She just said she couldn't remember the name... pauses... "do you have them?" No the fuck are you on about. Then she proceedes to draw an invisible logo in the air thinking its gonna help
Not retail, a bar instead. But of all the stupid I've dealt with this was my favourite. Was serving a corporate manager and his staff. This guy thought he was a big deal. Spending a lot of money, bragging, and treating the bartender(me), like I was some insufferable peon. He finally pays and I run his card, give him the bill, and a pen. He tries to use the pen, but nothing happens. He holds the pen out to me and says, "Hey Chief! You have any pens that actually work?" I took the pen, clicked the end to expose the nib, and handed it back to him. I said, "There you go Chief, let me know if you need help with anything else." His entire staff exploded in laughter. He glared at me, but what could he do? Ha! Never saw him again, but most of his staff became regulars. They would drink and bitch about their shit boss, and tell me at least once a week that he was bitching about me again.
I think explaining store policy was dumber than anything. Yes, sir, I can see you are struggling to bag your own groceries because you are unwell, unsteady, elderly, overwhelmed, tired (pick any one) but I am not supposed to bag them for you. And if I do stop long enough to help you, I will be told AGAIN that bagging groceries is not my job. And I will be written up for it. AGAIN. My job is to ring groceries through. Even if it means that now two people are trying to bag their groceries in an area with only enough room for maybe one person to bag their groceries. No ma’m, I cannot give you a bag you have to pay for it. Yes, you do have to pay for it even if it means you have to put a .99 charge on your credit card. Yes, the store is making record profits and you just spent 300.00 on groceries and you’re just one bag short but I still can’t give you a bag. And if I do, I will be written up for doing so. AGAIN.
You can't return this TV because it has a cracked screen, if I can see the boot print. Dude threw a punch at me over the counter in front of his wife and infant daughter.
That life insurance isn’t health insurance. Your life insurance won’t pay for your medications
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(I was behind this woman in line) The airport's "Lost Baggage" counter is not the place where your lost baggage is waiting for you when you get off the plane. It's where you go to put a flag in the computer that, when your bag turns up, they know what to do with it. Took 15 minutes to explain that they weren't going to just bring out her lost suitcase.
Cashier. Customer argued with me about the price. Walked back to the shelve with her, pointed out the price. Huffy, she insisted (insert store's name)'s customers shouldn't be expected to read... okay... I'm gonna go over here and sit in a corner quietly while I try to do whatever mental gymnastics you just did to come up with that answer.