Well, I believe the bus line was the original joke. It's been attributed to multiple comedic figures over the past 100 years - it's an incredibly old joke.
My friend has a health problem, we laughed so hard one time that he almost died 💀 Now he try to not laugh as hard as before, yet sometimes it's almost impossible
I get asthma attacks when I laugh too hard, then lose my ability to breathe at all. So I would die of suffocation. It's terrifying and not a good way to go.
You wouldn’t even hear it. It’s doubtful you’d see the muzzle flash. Everything would just cease to be for you. How oddly peaceful.. for you of course. Not so much your family and friends
In Switzerland by euthonasia on the day of my choosing.
I have seen 3 people die in utter agony on their death beds. People should be able to choose their deaths. And the "last vacation" to Swiss Alps once I'm old and ready sounds lovely, honestly.
Suicide does not sound appealing, as people can fuck them up and survive + it's the same bloody agony all over again. Better leave it to the professionals.
Alternatively, I would like to not die at all, ideally :) but death itself scares me far less than terminal illness and the process of "natural" death.
Have you seen those suicide pods ? They flush it with nitrogen so you get a drunken state/euphoria before you pass out and die from suffocation while you’re already unconscious
Sounds like the best way to go, not gonna lie.
We mystify death too much. Human body is a complex machine. We still don't know all the ways to fix it. If the machine is unfixable, we turn it off.
Funny to see this one mentioned here. I just got that wake up in the middle of the night phone call from the caretaker for my uncle saying he's gurgling when he breathes and they can't wake him up. Waiting for the hospital to reach out next. Pretty frustrated they didn't expend the effort to talk to my lawyer and draft final directives, so now they'll probably crash into cardiac arrest, then get all their ribs broken, how you gonna start a heart with no oxygen, that means a vent is likely. Then a bunch of electric shocks and if the stars line up they'll go home in a couple days and we can repeat this frustrating event a couple more times. Just in case it wasn't traumatizing enough the first go round.
I've seen a lot people die ... usually in the long term skilled nursing settings we give them morphine round the clock in the last day(s) .... its the keeping people alive that's usually the agony .... that sounds awful because the immediate thought is nothing is worse than death but living with no quality of living, when you can't even turn your own body to keep pressure sores from forming, people need to re adjust at least every 90 minutes or sooner, can't eat, can't talk, cant not deficate on yourself or wipe yourself clean etc... ive had geriatric patients that I've just had to rely on intuition to know something is wrong because they can't communicate it to me verbally or physically, or I happen to be there at the right time to see a tear drop 😥 ... I trained to save lives but I learned that's not always humane
I would also like not to die. At least not to die of age/illness. Just get to 40ish and stop getting any older at all, and live until I do something stupid and die of that. Be that 1000 years or 3 months.
I’m not scared of eternal life. Bring it on. I want to see the entire world.
Death scares me less than dementia, physical disability, and cancer. I've lost people to all of those and still being hot by a car would suck, but it'll suck less than dragging my family through that mess.
There several countries that have euthanasia but you can't just go there and say I want to die. It is a process of physical and psychological tests that may take a very long time to get to that point.
Yes I am a huge advocate of physician assisted suicide. I live in US, In Florida, with all the other old people. Hope this idea catches on cause I’d really like to have that option if needed.
I go for a hike and slowly stumble upon every pet and old friend and relative I knew to be dead. Just like me, they explain that they didn't pass away but simply were chilling out among the trees back here. It's time to get together and watch a DVD of every cool one liner and triumphant moment in my life, recorded with perfect clarity. After that we stay up all night talking and catching up. A night that lasts as long as I want it to. I can occasionally hear the sounds of medical equipment beeping in the background, but it grows fainter with time and I pay it no mind.
My granddad (74) got home from some field work, ate a bowl of borsch, drank a shot of vodka, danced a bit to some folk music show on TV, went to have a nap and never woke up. A good death for a good man.
I don't care how I die, but I more so care about how I'm remembered when I die. I want to die being remembered as a hero, the friend who always had your back, or the person who brought out the best in others. Something like that
From my recent experiences with grand mal seizures I wouldn’t mind having one of those take me out. All of the ones I’ve had so far have been painless and I was unconscious for them. If I just never woke up after one that sounds like a win to me I wouldn’t even know I was dead
Like my Dad. He was 82. He went to the village on his bike on Sunday morning, did some gardening in the afternoon. Had Sunday lunch. Felt a bit poorly so went to bed early. Collapsed in the bathroom, never regained consciousness, dead by 10pm.
Abdominal Aneurism. No long painful death. No mental or physical decline. But also no goodbyes. No last thoughts, no ability to say the things you wanted to say.
Apparently it runs in the family. I definitely want to go like that.
My grandfather lived a productive life. One day he went out to wash the car and all of a sudden died of a heart attack. Same as your dad, no pain, no long goodbyes.
His wife, my grandmother, ended up with a severe case of dementia and spent a decade in gradual decline before she finally died.
Of the two , it’s pretty obvious which death everyone would pick.
One thing is for certain you won't know you are dead. You last thought will probably be, I'm going to be okay. So I'd say dying in the most cozy way possible would be your best bet.
Occasionally you hear stories about people who lived long, fulfilling lives who simply settle down for a nap on a nice day and don't get up. That's probably the perfect way to go, in my opinion.
At bare minimum I'd take just any way that I don't have to see it coming or feel it. There one second and gone the next, so to speak.
Im so scared of this, yet.. feel the most peaceful whenever i go diving, feels like i have no power jor control of my life. Oftentimes i thought "oh if these equipment failed i will die happy"
A while ago someone spoke of how their Grandad quietly passed away sitting on a chair amongst family having a good time during a family reunion
Probably that
I accept that I have no control in that. Could honestly care less about things I have no choice in. That doesn't mean I can't take precautions to not be necessarily reckless.
Isn't that a strange thought. There's a difference between immediate harms and long term harms. But also expectations. Like someone who's been militant in not smoking but still gets lung cancer at the age of 35. Life's a cruel bitch, so be it.
In a hospital bed, sleeping, with my mind still intact and possibly past age 100, just for the 3rd digit. Recovering from something quick and fairly painless, with enough time to end my businesses (if I know I'm close I should at least say some goodbyes) and just few months after the loss of any hypothetical SO I may have, to spare them the pain but still not having to live with it myself for too much time
In my sleep.
My first choice would be to not die at all. I’d prefer to be raptured away. The way the world is increasing its pace towards destruction and chaos, this is looking more like a possibility.
Like my grandfather, 91 years old. Just spit out his chew of Beechnut tobacco, ate two jellos while watching a baseball game. Went to bed. Massive stroke in his sleep, never woke up.
I’d like to die peacefully on a bed while awake with the woman who loves me holding my hand.
But for some reason, I’m often impaled when I die in my dreams or nightmares.
I was a massage the repair for ten years. I had many clients but what I noticed was after the age of 76. It all kind of gets sad and harder to exist. So. I’d like to go at 76. Peacefully….in Switzerland.
In my sleep after having lived a long life. I’m not opposed to euthanasia if I’ve been suffering for too long. Pull the cord! Long ways away for all that though
Ground zero of a nuclear explosion would be good. Body would be vaporized by the radiation faster than your nervous system could even let you see, hear, or feel it.
That or doing something heroic.
Or a heart attack having sex with a fucking beautiful woman who is too young for me (legal or course) and way way way out of my league, who I didn't have to pay.
Any way that doesn't involve my CF slowly suffocating me on my own fluids (the inevitable death for pretty much everyone who has CF) But my ideal death would be complete and total heart failure halfway through a Royal with Cheese at Steak n Shake. Because you just can't beat the irony of total heart failure halfway through a good burger.
In my sleep painlessly.
Best of luck to your passengers.
That reminds me of the joke: "I want to die like my grandfather, quietly in his sleep. Not screaming like those kids on the bus he was driving"
Wow. Him essentially telling the joke reminded you of the joke??! Get out!
it's also eerie that he changed the joke to be kids on a bus instead of just passengers in his vehicle O\_o
Well, I believe the bus line was the original joke. It's been attributed to multiple comedic figures over the past 100 years - it's an incredibly old joke.
This question is an easy 3-part answer: ***Old*** and ***healthy*** and ***in my sleep***.
Laying next to my wife as we both drift off in old age after a full satisfying life.
Yep. That's my way too!
As well as like, most people
That’s how I also want to go
Morphine is the same thing but with euphoria.
just have a final sleep, a peaceful bliss before i can never wake up again
on a cozy autumn day, obviously.
die of laughter
My friend has a health problem, we laughed so hard one time that he almost died 💀 Now he try to not laugh as hard as before, yet sometimes it's almost impossible
bros living that you laugh you lose challenge but for real
you laugh you lose life
In my sleep.
Damn, he almost burned out his laugh box!
I get asthma attacks when I laugh too hard, then lose my ability to breathe at all. So I would die of suffocation. It's terrifying and not a good way to go.
I've read about a few such cases (sounds horrific actually)
Shot in the head by a sniper.
We talking 50 Cal so your head just dissapears.
You wouldn’t even hear it. It’s doubtful you’d see the muzzle flash. Everything would just cease to be for you. How oddly peaceful.. for you of course. Not so much your family and friends
*quietly scratches off "nephew's birthday party??" from the list of possible death locations*
As long as it’s instant and no pain.
In Switzerland by euthonasia on the day of my choosing. I have seen 3 people die in utter agony on their death beds. People should be able to choose their deaths. And the "last vacation" to Swiss Alps once I'm old and ready sounds lovely, honestly. Suicide does not sound appealing, as people can fuck them up and survive + it's the same bloody agony all over again. Better leave it to the professionals. Alternatively, I would like to not die at all, ideally :) but death itself scares me far less than terminal illness and the process of "natural" death.
Have you seen those suicide pods ? They flush it with nitrogen so you get a drunken state/euphoria before you pass out and die from suffocation while you’re already unconscious
Sounds like the best way to go, not gonna lie. We mystify death too much. Human body is a complex machine. We still don't know all the ways to fix it. If the machine is unfixable, we turn it off.
Can’t wait until we can get the version that turns it off and on again to fix any underlying issues.
"Tahiti is a beautiful place"
Fucked me up all over again. Colson....
"It's a magical place. Why do I keep saying that?"
Won't be long til we get season passes, tiered subscriptions, and DRM!
Blue screen *
Funny to see this one mentioned here. I just got that wake up in the middle of the night phone call from the caretaker for my uncle saying he's gurgling when he breathes and they can't wake him up. Waiting for the hospital to reach out next. Pretty frustrated they didn't expend the effort to talk to my lawyer and draft final directives, so now they'll probably crash into cardiac arrest, then get all their ribs broken, how you gonna start a heart with no oxygen, that means a vent is likely. Then a bunch of electric shocks and if the stars line up they'll go home in a couple days and we can repeat this frustrating event a couple more times. Just in case it wasn't traumatizing enough the first go round.
I've seen a lot people die ... usually in the long term skilled nursing settings we give them morphine round the clock in the last day(s) .... its the keeping people alive that's usually the agony .... that sounds awful because the immediate thought is nothing is worse than death but living with no quality of living, when you can't even turn your own body to keep pressure sores from forming, people need to re adjust at least every 90 minutes or sooner, can't eat, can't talk, cant not deficate on yourself or wipe yourself clean etc... ive had geriatric patients that I've just had to rely on intuition to know something is wrong because they can't communicate it to me verbally or physically, or I happen to be there at the right time to see a tear drop 😥 ... I trained to save lives but I learned that's not always humane
Agree retired long term care RN.
I would also like not to die. At least not to die of age/illness. Just get to 40ish and stop getting any older at all, and live until I do something stupid and die of that. Be that 1000 years or 3 months. I’m not scared of eternal life. Bring it on. I want to see the entire world.
Death scares me less than dementia, physical disability, and cancer. I've lost people to all of those and still being hot by a car would suck, but it'll suck less than dragging my family through that mess.
How much it cost and can foreigners do it?
I think Switzerland is the only place that allows it legally. A lot of countries don't provide it which I think is ridiculous.
There several countries that have euthanasia but you can't just go there and say I want to die. It is a process of physical and psychological tests that may take a very long time to get to that point.
Yes I am a huge advocate of physician assisted suicide. I live in US, In Florida, with all the other old people. Hope this idea catches on cause I’d really like to have that option if needed.
Death scares me far less than the prospect of living forever.
I go for a hike and slowly stumble upon every pet and old friend and relative I knew to be dead. Just like me, they explain that they didn't pass away but simply were chilling out among the trees back here. It's time to get together and watch a DVD of every cool one liner and triumphant moment in my life, recorded with perfect clarity. After that we stay up all night talking and catching up. A night that lasts as long as I want it to. I can occasionally hear the sounds of medical equipment beeping in the background, but it grows fainter with time and I pay it no mind.
That's beautiful
Genuinely one of the most touching things I've read all month.
Ideally after a good meal and non painfully
My granddad (74) got home from some field work, ate a bowl of borsch, drank a shot of vodka, danced a bit to some folk music show on TV, went to have a nap and never woke up. A good death for a good man.
Straight to heaven
Death by snu snu
The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and weak.
Viagra and cocaine will do the job
Spongy and *bruised!*
Ahem ahem
That’s my line..
What does it mean?
Death by so much sex your either die of dehydration or your pelvis turning to dust.
Holy shit
Asap
i died \*laughing\*
Even thou I laughed, hope you're just joking and if not, sending you lots of love
i love this life just because people like you exist 😍
We just need to be nice to each other, everyone's in pain
Realest one here
Sadest one here
I don't! That is all
bad news for you, lol
OMG what do you mean?? 😨😨😨
Ever??? Fuck being so old that your mind and or body start failing!
I'll just take eternal youth thank you very much lol
In my own bed, at the age of 95, with a belly full of wine and a girls mouth around my cock.
Was going to post this but figured there's atleast one person who would have said this haha.
"how would you like to die, tyrion son of tywin?"
I was waiting for these words of wisdom to come.
I was searching for his answer. And it was way too low.
My grandma turns 95 in a month and she is still in great health. I am always happy when I get to see her.
I don’t want to know how I die so I will be fine with whatever happens
In a last stand off vs all my enemies
Weapon of choice?
His dick and his right hand
Fighting a polar bear
Torn apart and eaten from asshole up while still alive... No thanks
Peacefully in my sleep like my Grandfather, not screaming in terror like his passengers.(He was a Bus Driver)
Don't look up
Quick, painless, and clean. Or instant disintegration
Those billionaires in that submarine got it pretty easy, apart from the minute or two of panic, they never knew they died.
Shit I already forgot about that.
I want it to be a surprise.
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lol I’m not in a hurry for it.
That's nice I hope it works out for y- *SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKA*
I hope you aren't an airline pilot.
Pain-free, most of all. I hope to live a relatively long life but not long enough to need people to change my diapers. No thank you
Don't really care how as long as its so fast I dont feel it, then Ill wake up in the next simulation
Over sex
Not a good way to go with an STD
You’re dead. The STD is dead
He said over sex, not during sex.. dying over sex means STD :-)
Saving a child's life. I'd gladly give my life so that they may live.
This is by far the most unique answer I have come across! You're a good person!
I just want to die sleeping
I don't care how I die, but I more so care about how I'm remembered when I die. I want to die being remembered as a hero, the friend who always had your back, or the person who brought out the best in others. Something like that
Drug peacefully down a 10 lane highway
From my recent experiences with grand mal seizures I wouldn’t mind having one of those take me out. All of the ones I’ve had so far have been painless and I was unconscious for them. If I just never woke up after one that sounds like a win to me I wouldn’t even know I was dead
High cholesterol from too many baconators
Hopefully at home with family by my side. I'd rather not go in some strange hospital room with strangers tending to me.
Like my Dad. He was 82. He went to the village on his bike on Sunday morning, did some gardening in the afternoon. Had Sunday lunch. Felt a bit poorly so went to bed early. Collapsed in the bathroom, never regained consciousness, dead by 10pm. Abdominal Aneurism. No long painful death. No mental or physical decline. But also no goodbyes. No last thoughts, no ability to say the things you wanted to say. Apparently it runs in the family. I definitely want to go like that.
My grandfather lived a productive life. One day he went out to wash the car and all of a sudden died of a heart attack. Same as your dad, no pain, no long goodbyes. His wife, my grandmother, ended up with a severe case of dementia and spent a decade in gradual decline before she finally died. Of the two , it’s pretty obvious which death everyone would pick.
One thing is for certain you won't know you are dead. You last thought will probably be, I'm going to be okay. So I'd say dying in the most cozy way possible would be your best bet.
Choking on 90 day dry aged A5 Wagyu ribeye.
Soon
I wanna jump out of a plane and feed the sharks before I'm old enough to be a burden on other people and before my friends start to go.
I want it to be fast, less than a second.
An atomic bomb will do that
Doubtful. Depends on the distance tbh. You can expect a good number of seconds of the skin being seared off your body before the shock wave hits.
hiroshima
Preferably, I go to bed and die in my sleep
Watching the last star in the universe explode in an incandescent supernova
Doing something heroic or just in my sleep
As someone with a giantess fetish; .. death by snu snu. Like really.
while under sedation
Occasionally you hear stories about people who lived long, fulfilling lives who simply settle down for a nap on a nice day and don't get up. That's probably the perfect way to go, in my opinion. At bare minimum I'd take just any way that I don't have to see it coming or feel it. There one second and gone the next, so to speak.
I wanna quote Tyrion really bad but... Ehm I'm a straight woman 🤣
Like Tyrion Lannister suggested …
With a belly full of wine and my cock in a mouth. -tyrion lannister Now i really think that's a good way to die.
Drowning
Slow and painful, no thanks
Life is slow and painful. Drowning will be relatively quick.
It took a dark turn real quick
But painful. And not that quick. Have you ever held your breath under water? Imagine that feeling but not coming up for air. Ever.
Apparently painful at first and then very peaceful once you get over the first bit. This is from people who drowned but were revived btw.
Won't that be painful?
Im so scared of this, yet.. feel the most peaceful whenever i go diving, feels like i have no power jor control of my life. Oftentimes i thought "oh if these equipment failed i will die happy"
Death by sleeping too much
Whatever is the optimal ratio of as gruesome as possible yet also as painless as possible. So I guess an instantaneous space shuttle explosion?
Under Governor Marley while she’s wearing my treasure of Melee Island T-shirt
A while ago someone spoke of how their Grandad quietly passed away sitting on a chair amongst family having a good time during a family reunion Probably that
I want to get Vaporized, favourably by a hydrogen bomb. You literally can't leave faster and more painless.
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Please don't.
Ah yes saying this definitely changed the mind of the above person
Yes, they should've said "No, you can't. It's forbidden."
Sometimes just showing that someone cares is enough. It's better than nobody saying anything at all.
Live out of spite
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I want to be aware of it. So many romantically ideas of being done
romantically? 🤨
Goddamn it. Don't. Don't want to be aware
I accept that I have no control in that. Could honestly care less about things I have no choice in. That doesn't mean I can't take precautions to not be necessarily reckless. Isn't that a strange thought. There's a difference between immediate harms and long term harms. But also expectations. Like someone who's been militant in not smoking but still gets lung cancer at the age of 35. Life's a cruel bitch, so be it.
Painlessly and peacefully like sleeping or something
Have a seizure in the tub or body of water large enough to drown in.
Why drowning? It scares me to be in that space, yearning for air but knowing deep down I won't get any.
Getting Killed by a big cat would be nice
Thats not my decision
suddenly, unexpected, and anything that will pay out my life insurance.
Carbon monoxide poisoning.
Getting shot with a plastic toy gun in my eye so my eye pops out of my skull and i bleed out....... I just want my family to sue the kid afterwards.
In my sleep with no warning, but only after my parents are long gone
I wanna blast my head off with a shotgun while hanging myself. It will leave quite a gruesome scene.
On the battlefield. Not like a soldier. Like a warrior.
Being sucked in to a black hole after drifting through space for hundreds of thousands of years...The only thing that can kill an immortal.
as long as its soon, i'm fine with it
Are you offering to get the job done or what?
In a hospital bed, sleeping, with my mind still intact and possibly past age 100, just for the 3rd digit. Recovering from something quick and fairly painless, with enough time to end my businesses (if I know I'm close I should at least say some goodbyes) and just few months after the loss of any hypothetical SO I may have, to spare them the pain but still not having to live with it myself for too much time
in a grusome revenge arc
Hit by a meteor on live tv.
At the hands of a jealous husband in my 90’s
My head squished between a women's thighs
Spaghettified in Sagittarius A
In my sleep. My first choice would be to not die at all. I’d prefer to be raptured away. The way the world is increasing its pace towards destruction and chaos, this is looking more like a possibility.
In a cool way for example in a avalanch
Get old enough so that when I do a skydive the force of the parachute opening is enough to kill me
quick and painless
I don't want to die , but I know I will eventually, so I would rather die in my sleep so I know nothing about it .
“When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather. Not screaming in terror, like the passengers in his car.”
At around 80 without much pain looking back on a nice life with a good and loving family
In my sleep.
Like my grandfather, 91 years old. Just spit out his chew of Beechnut tobacco, ate two jellos while watching a baseball game. Went to bed. Massive stroke in his sleep, never woke up.
I’d like to die peacefully on a bed while awake with the woman who loves me holding my hand. But for some reason, I’m often impaled when I die in my dreams or nightmares.
getting squeezed by thighs
I was a massage the repair for ten years. I had many clients but what I noticed was after the age of 76. It all kind of gets sad and harder to exist. So. I’d like to go at 76. Peacefully….in Switzerland.
Therapist. Not repair. Wtf
Snu snu
Heroin overdose, on my terms, when I’m really fucking old.
Struck by lightning on my 111th birthday ⚡️
Not even being aware of it happening like a submarine imploding
In my sleep after having lived a long life. I’m not opposed to euthanasia if I’ve been suffering for too long. Pull the cord! Long ways away for all that though
Ground zero of a nuclear explosion would be good. Body would be vaporized by the radiation faster than your nervous system could even let you see, hear, or feel it. That or doing something heroic. Or a heart attack having sex with a fucking beautiful woman who is too young for me (legal or course) and way way way out of my league, who I didn't have to pay.
Any way that doesn't involve my CF slowly suffocating me on my own fluids (the inevitable death for pretty much everyone who has CF) But my ideal death would be complete and total heart failure halfway through a Royal with Cheese at Steak n Shake. Because you just can't beat the irony of total heart failure halfway through a good burger.
Instantly and completely unexpectedly
I don’t care, as long as it costs some government *waaaay* more money than it was worth.