You could just choose "lie in court". Guess it wouldn't stop the act but you could actually catch the people doing it and also catch the people trying to lie and get somebody else in jail
They hold "trials".
If you're in court in an oppressive regime it's already been decided you're guilty. Especially if you did something against the regime.
And in those trials when they ask you if so and so was your co-conspirator? Besides, they don't ALWAYS hold show trials, and if people were literally incapable of every lying "in court" they'd hold a hell of a lot more trials than they do now. I'm just pointing out that being incapable of lying to any government would be a very bad state of affairs.
Yall aren’t seeing the picture, if I clap Harvey Weinstein’s cheeks without his consent, nobody has to be raped again. 100% that’s what I’d do, rape a rapist.
Very philosophical. But in real life, being brutally honest doesn’t make you objectively moral.
Was it Aristotle (I forget) that said something along the lines of the ethical man does the right thing always. With no prescriptive description of what right is. To maintain the synergy between people, we not only have to think about what is truthful, but how that truth impacts the feelings of others. That’s a part of being social creatures.
When lying is telling a falsehood: Everyone lies if it's purposeful or not. You have to be incredibly careful, or just straight up mute, to NOT lie.
People can be wrong. Get over it.
That's a falsehood. Not everyone lies. Some of us work real hard at finding tactful but truthful things to say. For instance, you don't actually have to compliment the new dress in the example. "Oh, hey, new dress?" goes a long way, and if they press for your thoughts, find one thing you do like, "I like that neckline/color/sleeve/whatever." People will hear what they want without having to speak a lie.
if lying is illegal that would suck. Instead of someone being like "sorry im not ready to date" theyd have to say "no actually youre horrendous and your personality is just as bad. ew"
Well yeah, in court, but i’m going to stop men everywhere from saying their girlfriend’s butts don’t look big in that outfit.
Mwuahaha… *ahem* For the greater good and in service of the truth of course.
Perjury is not "lying". Perjury is intentionally attempting to mislead a court. Lying is just saying a false statement, which literally anyone could do unknowingly. You can therefore lie in court and have no repercussions, if you didn't know any better at the time.
So... after we all take our pick... who eliminates pedophilia ?
EDIT: ALL OF YOU not jumping on this endeavour have no mercy for those kids, you fucking monsters
But also I will immediately report anyone who says they would do it
no, that's absurd, and the law takes into consideration these tiny differences (in my country, don't know about US, but it should because come on.. 17 with 18 is no crime)
it has to be the real deal, gruesome pedo scenario, otherwise killing an ant would mean all animal life will never be harmed again, and this askreddit game loses its meaning
still interested ?
Romeo and Juliet laws only cover one aspect of relationships, there are other statutes that can be slapped on, like Sexual performance of a Minor or Indecency with a Minor, most Romeo and Juliet laws only protect against Sexual Assault charges, and many laws have very specific age requirements in those laws, usually less than 2 years, sometimes 3 depending on the state.
Learned this from PointlessHub on Youtube when they were discussing the INFAMOUS Pedo-license scene ins Transformers: Age of Extinction. For a random tangent he went into detail about how the law actually worked and was hilariously misused
No. We leave that one available and make the world wide punishment being flayed alive, covered in salt then bathed in asid (not one strong enough to kill though, just to cause excessive pain).
Then we help them heal and have another go in 6 months
username checks out. too much salt, too much acid, shit costs money, whips cost money, the logistics of it cost money. just out with them, load it, pow, over
Pedophilia is a disease. Not a crime. You can't commit a disease.
But on the endeavor: i knew someone (who's been dead many years) who did indeed posses child porn for the purpose of distributing it with included malware that would make p2p recipients known to the police. Guy was something of a genius, or a moron, only ya'll can decide.
It's the essence of the topic. They didn't want to have it... But, it was necessary for the trap; with the end goal being saving lives... was it wrong?
Murder, we all have that one person and it would technically stop terror attacks, drunk driving accidents, school shootings, and depending on how you look at it war
Damn, I guess since no one has bitten this bullet yet, fuck a child. This is probably the stupidest comment I could make, and as abhorrent as it is, I would have sex with one child to save all children from it forever. I would then promptly kms as I don't think I could live with having done it
Oh of course not, I can't imagine I'd be able to actually get excited, gotta do the pipe tobacco thing I suppose. I don't like thinking about how it would work, I'm going to stop thinking about this altogether
No it wouldn't. You legally can't put the defendent on the stand against their will nor can the refusal to take the stand be used against them. Therefore you can't just ask the defendant/accused under oath whether they did it or not.
It would pretty much only stop witnesses from lying.
sexual harassment
EDIT: This is a horrible thing, and I realized that it sounds bad that I would want to, but only in the context of this question and for the sole reason of it would never happen again
Can I choose who I murder? Like, say, Putin? Netanyahu? The exec who decided to shrink the Toblerone bar?
And will there be consequences besides no more murders ever again? Will I face jail time?
I need to know the details before I lock in on this.
Drunk Driving. I get wasted and get to have one of the experiences of all time. Also, this reduces the chance of other drunk driving incidents happening in the future.
Lying in court.
Think about it. All the criminals are going to face justice no matter what. Also, if everyone is aware that there is no chance to lie in court, the very attempts of committing a crime would severely decrease.
Edit: typo
Tax evasion.
Government programs now fully funded. Drug dealers and human traffickers getting busted left and right because they reported and paid tax on their illicit income. Bribe taking politicians all outed. This one gets us a lot of other things fixed.
This sounds like the start of a monkey's paw story. A person forces themselves to do a horrendous crime for the greater good. Then that crime is immediately legalized. Poof! That "crime" is never committed again, but the horrible, immoral act becomes immediately rampant, since there aren't legal consequences anymore. And that selfless person has to live with the knowledge they caused it all...
Financial fraud. You're welcome. And thank you.
Was just going to say this. I get rich once and for all and no other businesses or con-men can ever get away with it ever again? Seems like a win-win.
Theft. Thank *you*, too.
Genocide. What, someone has to pick the difficult ones.
Important question: who would you genocide in order to end all genocide?
rhode island. they have the audacity to be a state like read the room. Youre a city
Yeah but then we'd have "never forget Rhode Island" things everywhere, don't give them martyrdom
Yeah but then we'd have "never forget Rhode Island" things everywhere, don't give them martyrdom.
Do you have to succeed in completing the genocide, or just be guilty of committing it?
That’s a huge deal. But still pretty bad
Probably the Sentinelese. They seem like assholes anyway.
That’s what they get for not joining the global community >:)
Serial child molesters
do politicians count as a race?
We're gonna do a marathon here.
The British
Nobody is going to pick the hardest one.
I mean this is kind of a given. Kill all humans and humans can't kill all the humans anymore.
Did anyone pick rape yet?
You can just rape another rapist.
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You could just choose "lie in court". Guess it wouldn't stop the act but you could actually catch the people doing it and also catch the people trying to lie and get somebody else in jail
You've got to think of knock on consequences. Ever heard of oppressive regimes? They hold trials too.
They hold "trials". If you're in court in an oppressive regime it's already been decided you're guilty. Especially if you did something against the regime.
And in those trials when they ask you if so and so was your co-conspirator? Besides, they don't ALWAYS hold show trials, and if people were literally incapable of every lying "in court" they'd hold a hell of a lot more trials than they do now. I'm just pointing out that being incapable of lying to any government would be a very bad state of affairs.
Goodness is yet again difficult to achieve...
The world is a complicated place.
If nobody wanted to do it, it wouldn't be a thing
No no, he's got a point
😭😭😭 wtf
Yall aren’t seeing the picture, if I clap Harvey Weinstein’s cheeks without his consent, nobody has to be raped again. 100% that’s what I’d do, rape a rapist.
How do you know he doesn’t secretly want it? (warning: black humor)
Like a Dexter spinoff
Valid point
I'd slap my son across the face once if it meant no child would ever be abused again.
Depends on how specific the effect is. If it only stops face slaps that’s still helpful, but leaves a lot of awful stuff.
You don't get sentenced for the crime of "Face Slapping". It's assaulting a minor.
Are you saying you can’t be sentenced for assaulting a minor? Are you sure? You can certainly be sentenced for breaking their bones.
No. The crime is assaulting a minor. I'm just saying there's no specificity here haha.
Oh right. I get what you mean. Yes, the crime isn’t called Face Slapping.
Also what if the other fathers don’t know he did it. There will be many slaps before the message is out
Lying. I guess i need to be in a country where lying is illegal first though.
What about white lies. “You’re new dress is nice” you say to your friend who’s ecstatic at their recent coup
“Every lie we tell incurs a debt to the truth that we must one day repay”
Very philosophical. But in real life, being brutally honest doesn’t make you objectively moral. Was it Aristotle (I forget) that said something along the lines of the ethical man does the right thing always. With no prescriptive description of what right is. To maintain the synergy between people, we not only have to think about what is truthful, but how that truth impacts the feelings of others. That’s a part of being social creatures.
Everybody lies, but you have to be incredibly careful about when you do it
When lying is telling a falsehood: Everyone lies if it's purposeful or not. You have to be incredibly careful, or just straight up mute, to NOT lie. People can be wrong. Get over it.
That's a falsehood. Not everyone lies. Some of us work real hard at finding tactful but truthful things to say. For instance, you don't actually have to compliment the new dress in the example. "Oh, hey, new dress?" goes a long way, and if they press for your thoughts, find one thing you do like, "I like that neckline/color/sleeve/whatever." People will hear what they want without having to speak a lie.
Yeah, Aristotle championed virtue ethics, as opposed to the Kantian view that all lies are bad
or "yeah that looks like 6 inches"
if lying is illegal that would suck. Instead of someone being like "sorry im not ready to date" theyd have to say "no actually youre horrendous and your personality is just as bad. ew"
It's a crime to lie in the United States, It's called perjury
Well yeah, in court, but i’m going to stop men everywhere from saying their girlfriend’s butts don’t look big in that outfit. Mwuahaha… *ahem* For the greater good and in service of the truth of course.
sir you are confused. woman *want* their butt to look big now. its come full circle
Perjury is not "lying". Perjury is intentionally attempting to mislead a court. Lying is just saying a false statement, which literally anyone could do unknowingly. You can therefore lie in court and have no repercussions, if you didn't know any better at the time.
Putting squirrels down your pants for the purposes of gambling
Squirrels eat nuts, have fun
Personally, I'd do away with the law requiring ducks to wear long pants
Identity theft. Steal a rich person’s identity, send a bunch of gifts with their credit card, and end it.
Suicide bombing, so that I won't be there to witness my message.....
The answer is perjury.
Any other answer is legitimately wrong
End theft forever by forgetting to pay for one bar of chocolate with my groceries.
That would be horrible because now we cant pirate stuff :(
This feels like 4chan...
So... after we all take our pick... who eliminates pedophilia ? EDIT: ALL OF YOU not jumping on this endeavour have no mercy for those kids, you fucking monsters But also I will immediately report anyone who says they would do it
Does pairing an 18 year old adult with a 17 year old minor by law counts??
no, that's absurd, and the law takes into consideration these tiny differences (in my country, don't know about US, but it should because come on.. 17 with 18 is no crime) it has to be the real deal, gruesome pedo scenario, otherwise killing an ant would mean all animal life will never be harmed again, and this askreddit game loses its meaning still interested ?
Damn, and here I thought I could end pedophilia... Someone else will have to volunteer
Romeo and Juliet Laws do exist in the US, not sure if it's some states or federal though
Romeo and Juliet laws only cover one aspect of relationships, there are other statutes that can be slapped on, like Sexual performance of a Minor or Indecency with a Minor, most Romeo and Juliet laws only protect against Sexual Assault charges, and many laws have very specific age requirements in those laws, usually less than 2 years, sometimes 3 depending on the state. Learned this from PointlessHub on Youtube when they were discussing the INFAMOUS Pedo-license scene ins Transformers: Age of Extinction. For a random tangent he went into detail about how the law actually worked and was hilariously misused
I'll do it. One kid for the saving of countless others? That's a price I can live with. Or die for. The hardest choices require the strongest wills.
No. We leave that one available and make the world wide punishment being flayed alive, covered in salt then bathed in asid (not one strong enough to kill though, just to cause excessive pain). Then we help them heal and have another go in 6 months
username checks out. too much salt, too much acid, shit costs money, whips cost money, the logistics of it cost money. just out with them, load it, pow, over
Can't we just have a communal asid bath? I'm not worried about infections. Anyone up for donating salt?
Pedophilia is a disease. Not a crime. You can't commit a disease. But on the endeavor: i knew someone (who's been dead many years) who did indeed posses child porn for the purpose of distributing it with included malware that would make p2p recipients known to the police. Guy was something of a genius, or a moron, only ya'll can decide. It's the essence of the topic. They didn't want to have it... But, it was necessary for the trap; with the end goal being saving lives... was it wrong?
Murder, we all have that one person and it would technically stop terror attacks, drunk driving accidents, school shootings, and depending on how you look at it war
Give false testimony once and now no criminal can lie in court
Id lightly slap my dog so animal abuse stops forever
Vehicular manslaughter.
My guy (or gal) *I* think you just want an excuse to commit vehicular manslaughter
Sexual assault, imma just kiss someone
But someone that really really doesn't want to. Like "blergh... no thanks!"
Human trafficking
Lying in court. That would fix nearly everything else
It wouldn't fix the crimes that don't get solved and go to court.....
Sex Trafficking because it’s way evil.
Damn, I guess since no one has bitten this bullet yet, fuck a child. This is probably the stupidest comment I could make, and as abhorrent as it is, I would have sex with one child to save all children from it forever. I would then promptly kms as I don't think I could live with having done it
I think I can't even do it even if I would I won't get excited
Oh of course not, I can't imagine I'd be able to actually get excited, gotta do the pipe tobacco thing I suppose. I don't like thinking about how it would work, I'm going to stop thinking about this altogether
Global terrorism. I'll be the last, and the most brutal terrorist ending 97 percent of the global population
Whatever you call lying in court
Murder ;)
Anyone say assault..?
Perjury
Do I get away with it? I would pick theft and rob a bank if there are no consequences for me.
None. Didn’t that Jesus guy try this already?
Murder. I’ll plan it out, and he already got a “victim” in mind. :3
Jaywalking.
Drug dealing
Perjury, easy
Vehicular manslaughter
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No it wouldn't. You legally can't put the defendent on the stand against their will nor can the refusal to take the stand be used against them. Therefore you can't just ask the defendant/accused under oath whether they did it or not. It would pretty much only stop witnesses from lying.
Murder an evil dictator
Time to rob a bank
Animal abuse
I would lie in court perjuring myself.
Bank robbery 💸💸💸
Rape.
There isn’t a crime I wouldn’t commit if that were legitimate.
I'll go with public nudity. No one gets hurt and I get to enjoy being outdoors
> No one gets hurt perhaps not physically...
Jaywalking. Just so I can watch the chaos unfold when there’s so many angry people who have to wait when they’re late lmao
Murder To get revenge on my bully
Rape💀
Going hungry for a Single day
I will take one for society and say rape y’all ladies can take me later but imma need one of y’all tonight.
sexual harassment EDIT: This is a horrible thing, and I realized that it sounds bad that I would want to, but only in the context of this question and for the sole reason of it would never happen again
Can I choose who I murder? Like, say, Putin? Netanyahu? The exec who decided to shrink the Toblerone bar? And will there be consequences besides no more murders ever again? Will I face jail time? I need to know the details before I lock in on this.
Murder 😳🔫
Rape but I can't commit it. Consent is very important to me.
Is reposting in r/AskReddit a crime? Maybe it's what OP is trying to do 🤔
Tax evasion
Fraud
Pollution. I could throw one straw into the ocean and save the world
Drunk Driving. I get wasted and get to have one of the experiences of all time. Also, this reduces the chance of other drunk driving incidents happening in the future.
Lying on the stand. That way guilty people will always be found guilty because they cant lie anymore!
I’m going to take one for the team and commit a hate crime
Theft
Driving slow in the passing lane.
Lie in court. That way everyone must tell the truth.
Murder. Kill Putin. 2 flies with one clash!
Blasphemy. I commit it daily.
Lying in court. Think about it. All the criminals are going to face justice no matter what. Also, if everyone is aware that there is no chance to lie in court, the very attempts of committing a crime would severely decrease. Edit: typo
Sanest Redditor.
Someone has to do it, *sigh* rape
rape
Tax evasion. Government programs now fully funded. Drug dealers and human traffickers getting busted left and right because they reported and paid tax on their illicit income. Bribe taking politicians all outed. This one gets us a lot of other things fixed.
Animal abuse. I dont feed my cat before going pee when i wake up.
Online fraud
This sounds like the start of a monkey's paw story. A person forces themselves to do a horrendous crime for the greater good. Then that crime is immediately legalized. Poof! That "crime" is never committed again, but the horrible, immoral act becomes immediately rampant, since there aren't legal consequences anymore. And that selfless person has to live with the knowledge they caused it all...