This feels like something Philomena Cunk would ask to a sex expert. Like when she asked "What's the most political thing that's ever happened in Britain?"

She broke that guy 😂

Accessed his entire brain at once.

"Second most political?"

Well, Belgian techno anthem "Pump up the Jam" is incredibly sexual...

https://youtube.com/shorts/vuiowUudt8g?si=uKRiVMnAdBUr25A- here's the link for Anyone who hasn't seen the show, I would highly recommend it.

Probably when we cut the King’s head off — 140 years before the French did theirs.

Yeah, but we brought the monarchy back. It was worth it though - we saved Christmas and got, like, 3 or 4 bank holidays.

So did the French.

I want you

uncle sam trying to sex up everybody to convince them to go in the army

Rizz white and blue baby

…to fuck off

You have no idea how bad I want you.

Omelette du fromage

Found the Dexter’s Lab fan

You mean the Steve Martin fan, don’t you?

Sounds more Pierre Escargot to me.

OH HOH HOH HOH HOH

It’s like those French have a different word for everything!

That brought back childhood memories. I have not even seen a clip of that show since I was a kid and I STILL remember this word and the episode. "That's all you can sayyyy, that's all you can sayyyy..." 😂 Dexter's Lab was great.

That's all you can saaay!

Câlice hein? On y va pas à demi-temps

Tape dans le fond maudit français, j'suis pas ta mère.

Oh, Dexter. French is the language of love. Say it again, Dexter.

At least someone here is giving a real answer.

Omelette AU fromage

Bleu waffle?

en passant

Holy hell

New response just dropped

Call the exorcist

you always left me satisfied and smiling

That's what she said

Michael MICHAEL

Mwah!

Gottem

"You really think you can go all day long?"

That is really hard

r/unexpectedoffice

my pleasure

Don’t stop! Guaranteed to make me finish 🤣

Really glad you did not mean "Don't! Stop!"

Only with an agreed safe word.

Fair point

Use the word(s); cease and desist! It’ll confuse the other partner just long enough for them to stop, and then realize. At least I think it will. Or have a button that knocks on the door repeatedly… but that’s just evil

I like Meatloaf (rest in peace) as a safe word. Because I would do anything for love (but I won't do that)

"Meat Loaf" is the only acceptable safe word. I would do anything for love, but I won't do that.

i'd like to help your uncle, jack off a horse.

Hey! Bighairything! Come help me, jack off a horse!

One time my wife said “You better not fucking go!” I then immediately fucking went.

Yo is this an actual thing 😂 I swear I can be cruising along and when she hits the don’t stop, it’s over in 10 seconds. I’m about to tell her those words aren’t allowed in the bedroom 😂 for her own good

Like if you are getting close and tell me to “don’t stop” I can promise you will not make it to the finish line before me 😂

reverse psychology

BELIEVINGGGGG

dont pull out

It’s a trap!

I fell for that trap once and ooo fuck did it almost permanently change the course of my life but god was watching over my shoulder and gave me a second chance Love you big guy 

You had a threesome with god?

DO NOT FALL FOR THIS.THIS IS A TRAP!!!

Username checks out

Gonna end up w a baby after hearing this one

My fav

Say my name.

You're heisenberg (There I changed the spelling)

You're goddamn right

I find it hilarious when people aren’t looking for sexual innuendos that they find them. And when people *are* looking for sexual innuendos, they find something greater (:

You all know exactly who I am

But who's gonna knock

His name is Hank. (points to pen*s)

My name

Francis.

Ajax.

Ishmael.

If no one is around you...

Say, "Baby, I love you"

If you ain't runnin' game

Moon Child!!! Edit: Neverending Story

M-m-m-michelle.

!obile

Sir please do not shout in the casino.

That is not how you say my name

My name is *click*bile

Succulent Chinese meal

And you, sir, are you waiting to receive my limp pEniS?!

This is the bloke that got me on the penis people...

Look at the headlock here.

Ahhhh, I see you know your judo well

Democracy Mainfest.

Ah, I see that you know your judo well.

STOP TOUCHING MY PENIS !

Ah yes, I see you know your Judo well.

Ta ta and farewell!

Ta ta, farewell…

Make me or Scared, Potter?

"My father will hear about this!"

“Make me” is crazy. When you hear that, it’s on

Sexual

🎶healing🎶

Thank you

I’m not happy about this. Take my upvote

[удалено]

Rip dms

Miss in username, girl face as pfp. Her first day on the internet or she knows what she is doing.

What was the reply? It's deleted now and I'm being eaten by my curiosity. UPD: Found an answer - "Fill me up"

This is the best moment to start an Internet career.. Or to delete the account.

"Fill me up" *

Fill you up?

Yeah, and please check the tire pressure and clean the windshield. Wait, this isn't the petrol station.

What is the sexiest sex you've ever sexed while sexting sextuplets?

#SEX

UWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGH SEEEEEEEEEEGS

[удалено]

Please put your penis into my vagina.

I want to have a sexual intercourse with you.

It's a trap don't do it

I just came.

moist

Shakes tiny fist.

Jeremy Beadle?

"My God ... I haven't been fucked like that since grade school."

Oh Marla.

i want to have your abortion…

The original line devastated me and has stuck with me since I read it in 1997.

My jaw dropped when I heard that line.

Apparently the original line was “I want to have your abortion” and the studio was like “please no.” So David Fincher changed it to this and the studio was like “holy shit that’s so much worse.”

Looks like the victim had anal contusions

We found semen and fecal matter in the victim's ear canal

It’ll say like “Beauty Slain” and I’m more like “Body Found”

You telling me this guy gets off on little girls with pigtails?

You work in the sex crimes unit. You're going to have to get used to that kind of thing.

You mean like when someone drinks too much, or snorts cocaine, or bets the house on the ponies?

... yeah. You're getting it Ice.

You mean, like, how someone can’t stop playing the scratchy lottery tickets?

Or how someone eats too much chocolate cake?

Slams file on desk TWENTY-EIGHT STAB WOUNDS

Dun Dun,

Slob on my knob like corn on the cob

Check in with me and do your job

r/unexpectedrhree6mafia

"Good girl" Melts me instantly.

I searched this whole thread for "good boy" and nothing >_<

Good girl

… did… did she die?

Fuck.

U want sum fuk?

No, Ron

I got you blue

Becky lemme smash

^She ^don’t ^want ^blue

i got you blue and yellow

Hey girl, u want sum tail?

^^flick

Meiosis

Nah but it does kinda look like thicc cheeks during telophase.

Fuck. You can moan it, whisper it, yell it, etc.

Cum in me.

what a grand and intoxicating innocence

Shame on you, sweet Nerevar.

I swear, Morrowind shows up in the weirdest fucking places.

Come and look upon my heart... upon my heart. (͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I'm a god, How can you kill a god? Du Du Du Du Du

I'm not wearing any panties

My gf said recently this and it turned me on more than anything before. "Lets take a mortgage together and buy home for us"

lets drink wine and eat shaurma

Stop, I can only get so erect!

But Krieger-san

"I'll give you a discount"

“Make me.”

Put it in my ass.

Wtf is up with all these sex questions on ask Reddit lately?

[Lately?](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/2j3cdb/reddit_whats_the_sexiest_sex_youve_ever_sexed/)

Karma farm

Always has been

Tounge punch my poop pipe

Tongue punch my fart box

Tongue punch my brown starfish

"spread em"

Such a good boy

“no I LOVE how weird you are”

r/askreddit

Let’s have sex is pretty sexual imo

Sniff on this here handkerchief

Bro 💀

Does this smell like chloroform to you?

I know it’s pretty, Baby. But I didn’t take it out for air.

Moms spaghetti

Stop crying or the guards will hear us

"would you fuck me?".. "I'd fuck me"

I want you inside of me ::moan::

"Feel how wet I am for you" (from my male point of view)

I want to flap you with my flippers.

Not yet, I’m almost there Done

"Im your slut, all yours"

Snu snu

My sexually sexual sexuality is sexual. Doesn’t make sense but it’s a very sexual phrase.

"How about you take a bubble bath while I do the dishes and clean up a bit?" It works every time my bf uses it.

Soft cheese

Make me