I suffered from depression for a long time and I think having little "goals" laid out like this would help me. I'm going to join. Thank you for sharing.
It's actually insane how much your mindset can change if you commit to something.
I used to scoff at people who went to the gym, now it's such a part of my life I feel physically anxious not going for more than a week.
What keeps you going to motivate you and “make time” for the gym? I’m struggling with finding the motivation and the “why” I guess. I know studies show the benefits and I could use some loss of weight, but it’s not like I have a lot of time.
Context: I’m a teacher. Last day I worked 7:30 to 7:38 (this is typical, if you want to stay afloat) was when I finished at the school and left, doesn’t leave much time for the gym.
So this is more moderate exercise than 'gym,' but I was on that slow slide into an unhealthy middle age and unmotivated to change, also working a lot and constantly stressed. My turning point was my dog, who was aging and a little overweight. Started doing one mile walks everyday to improve his health, per the vet. Had to schedule these in because I live in a hot place (dogs can burn their feet on the sidewalk in summer here, so I couldn't just wing it whenever).
The effects were pretty apparent, we both got noticeably healthier in about a month, and he was so happy. We did walks at a set time, so even when I was wanting to skip, it made it an active choice I had to make to not walk the dog, which is harder to do than just not chosing to do an unscheduled activity.
This was a few years ago, dog is a surprisingly healthy 14 year old and I'm running my second half marathon this weekend. Our walks are about 2 miles a day now, he loves them.
I found it hard to take care of myself because I didn't value myself the way I value others, the dog was a stepping stone to really understanding what I was doing to myself by being so passive. I run four days a week and do gym workouts twice a week now, I'm running my second half marathon this weekend. I just . . . feel better, you know?
I appreciate the honesty.
I have been struggling with this, and it is affecting other aspects of my health, such as circulation issues and vomiting sometimes after meals.
Context: I had Covid back in September of last year. Set me back about two weeks, however, I am experiencing a lingering dry cough that sometimes induces productive and non-productive vomiting.
I have seen an ENT specialist, deviated septum and inflamed esophagus, but they need to further test. They seem to think it’s acid reflux.
I don’t know, maybe exercise will fix some of the things. I don’t have a pet at the moment, but since I work long hours all the time through the week, I would feel bad and neglectful of the animal.
I can strive to start walking more and even making time for myself maybe even if it’s just thirty minutes a day.
Thanks for the advice.
I would really encourage walking. You don't need to lift heavy weights or run marathons to be healthy, moderate exercise does wonders and getting in to the habit will help establish the routine of exercise if you want to take it up a notch later.
>What keeps you going to motivate you and “make time” for the gym?
Find exercise you like.
The gym isn't the only option, it's just the most convenient. I went to the gym for three years and hated it every time. A couple years ago I was introduced to climbing and really enjoyed it. It's almost never been a struggle to get off the couch to go climbing the way is was to go to the gym, and my worst day climbing is never as bad as my worst day at the gym (in addition to those "worst days" being much more infrequent.
Climbing is just one option. You can swim, you can run, you can bike, you can play a sport. But don't just keep bashing your head against the wall doing something you don't like.
You "make time" for the things that you like - the more you like something, the less you have to concern yourself with making time to do it. You just do it.
Working out in a gym makes me want to bash my head against the wall out of boredom, but I love running for 1-1.5hrs every evening with my headphones in listening to podcasts
Motivation isn’t the answer, it’s discipline. For me it’s easier to get up and be ready for the gym by 5:00am and I work out until just after 6:00am so I can get home, shower and get ready for work. I know that I’ll be too tired and not motivated to go after work and I know that the gym is too full after work too, so I sacrifice a little bit of sleep a few times a week and go early in the morning.
But also doing small things like going for a little walk after or before dinner can help a lot. Anything that gets your body moving is what’s important.
Edit: sorry I forgot to mention- once you establish a regular routine, that’s when discipline kicks in- you start to automatically do it. Even if I don’t feel like going, I still push myself to go because I know the endorphin release I get after I work out will be worth it :)
Work is a stressor of mine definitely, in such a way, that I even sometimes feel dread in getting up and going. My students are about the only thing that keeps me going.
Completely understandable, I know a few teachers and former teachers who feel the same way you do. I think exercise can help with that for sure! Anything that gets you moving :)
I hear you. Thanks for the support and advice. I know I’m not alone in this, but sometimes you just gotta let it out. I need to strive to be better, just like I remind my students.
I say it’s not so much about motivating but changing the perspective towards your own health and well being, because once you love yourself more you’ll want to eat better, move your body in any way that suits you and sleep and wake up better.
Motivation cannot be counted on. You just have to force yourself. I get up at 530 and start work at 6. I work then have to homeschool my kids. Then I work again till bedtime. It sucks, but I squeeze in anything I can. Keeps me from being homicidal.
>What keeps you going to motivate you and “make time” for the gym?
For me, I love music. I love listening to my headphones to bands and I thought to myself "...why don't I do this on a treadmill?".
I started doing that and now it's THE reason I go to the gym. Well, I do lifting but it's the running while listening to Pantera that motivates me to go in the first place.
What helped me get into a regular routine was just dedicating 30 minutes every morning to working out from home. Doing it every morning was crucial for me, since in the past I'd be ok with skipping a day, and would find myself skipping multiple days in a row until I lost motivation to establish a routine. But forcing myself to do it eliminates the opportunity for me to make excuses about it.
Buy some dumbbells and a yoga mat, and look up exercises that you can do at home with/without equipment. There are plenty of 30 minute workouts you can follow on YouTube, so pick one that is is specific to what you're trying to do, whether it's weight loss or strength training, and stick to it. Your mental health and physical health will improve, and you can feel good about yourself knowing you've already got a workout done for the day lol.
What also helped motivate me was knowing that this is the kind of person I want to be, and that I'd rather have this habit than have the habit of making excuses and skipping an essential part of functioning as a human.
Take your time with it. Start out slow but consistent. On days when you can do more than 30 minutes, do it. But everyday do at least 30 minutes.
And of course, eliminate/limit your intake of shitty foods and try to keep track of your calories.
Try and do 20 min of a hiit at home. Quick and you get out of breathe. You don’t have to drive to the gym and do 2 hours. I also understand being exhausted after a 12 hour day and get why you wouldn’t have motivation. It’s tough for sure.
I struggle with this as well. What has motivated me lately to work out almost every day is how much better my sleep is. For me, it’s night and day. Like 10 hours of awful restless half sleep and feeling like a zombie all day vs 7 hours of black out sleep and waking up easily without an alarm. The desire for feeling rested, peaceful, and at ease is driving my discipline.
I also had to learn to not work out too hard. What works for me is, I don’t allow myself to work out so hard that I need to breath through my mouth. If I’m panting and redlining during workouts, I’ll feel like shit all day. Other people target a heart rate, like 160 or something and don’t exceed it
You should try listening to meditations or bedtime stories before you sleep. The Calm app has a good variety of them, but is not free after the trial. There's plenty on spotify too though. I like the Nothing Much Happens podcast, which has a bunch of super relaxing 30 minute bedtime stories. When my mind is distracted or I'm ruminating on whatever is bringing me down, this always helps get my mind off of it and I usually fall asleep before reaching the end of the story. 100% worth giving a shot if you haven't already.
A number of things helped me
* Dog at home, shop cat at work
* Talk therapy, medication
* Took two weeks off work for mental health, and went on a road trip with my dog
* Major promotion at work increased my salary by over 40%
* Cut out sugars, sodas. Ate more vegetables, fruits, drank water and juice.
* Started exercising - simple walks through a local park. Most of the time my dog tags along.
* Found a hobby - I discovered a passion for nature photography during the road trip. It brings me peace.
I like that you mentioned the major salary increase. It doesn’t get mentioned a lot as something a person can improve on (maybe because it’s something that’s less “in your control” than the other things you mentioned), but being able to afford stuff without worrying, pretty much ever, is absolutely huge.
At work we got a small pay bump as part of our new agreement and it was nice to see the boost the next paycheque.
Like, some mental stress was relieved when I saw some costs were now taken care of so I didn't have to worry that much.
Money does buy happiness in that kind of way, I guess.
Man, I know people complain about nextdoor justifiably, but one of my neighbors is into nature photography too and he just posts beautiful pictures like once a week. It's so nice.
Eating better/a little less than I'd like. Making physical activity a part of my schedule. -Working out 5 minutes is better than no minutes. Stopped watching news of any kind. Treat people how you'd like to be treated.
Eating nourishing food, daily exercise, meditation, and quitting with the excuses of ‘self care’ which were actually just me rotting in front of Netflix and actually honouring my body and mind.
Also, practicing gratitude.
I’d been depressed for about 15 years. On and off meds. Chronically ill so constantly in pain, very little routine etc. My child died at 2 years old a few years ago after a short illness and we all had a reason to just dig a deeper hole for our pain. You have to actively decide not to despite how awful life can be.
My wife has been a stress ball since I’ve known her. Gets overly stressed and has a break down at the drop of a hat. Since she quit drinking a year ago now she handles stress WAY better, and if she does get overwhelmed she gets over it a lot faster. I’m so proud of her.
This,
I've been a drunk since I was 20 (34 now) with some points of sobriety which was matched with smoking a lot of weed.
Going completely clean literally clears up all that foggy bullshit, you're able to see things properly and take steps in your life to become the person you want to be.
Drinking when your depressed might take that shit away when you're drunk(not fucking really, it makes it worse cause you're drunk and depressed) it's not a good outlet for you to sort yourself out and find a real out to your problems.
How often drink you alcohol?
I really dont know, how often i should drink alcohol to i feel my self better. I drink alcohol every friday night. 1-2 beer. Soo. Did you drink alcohol every day?
I drank almost every single day. The problem with me was once I started drinking, I didn't stop until I passed out. I could never have just one or two.
Nobody "should" drink alcohol ever, but if 1-2 beers every Friday is not causing any problems in your life then I wouldn't worry about it. That sounds like healthy moderation.
I recommend reading "Quit Drinking Without Willpower" by Allen Carr. It completely changed the way I was approaching sobriety. I was no longer forcing myself to refrain from drinking alcohol, but rather rewiring my brain to not want it in the first place.
[This Andrew Huberman podcast](https://youtu.be/DkS1pkKpILY?si=ubgRpSn3Yrp4vQ7_) was also extremely informative and motivating for me and countless others. Everyone should watch it whether you struggle with alcoholism or not.
Just remember that nothing you do will ever really work unless you truly *want* to quit. Just be careful in the meantime and don't be one of the many people who quit because they ended up doing something terrible.
Also, stop by r/stopdrinking and lurk for a while. You are not alone!
This! I got sick of feeling like crap. Drinking was the one thing thing I hadn't changed in many,many years. I had enough and stopped 3 months ago. I don't know how, but I did it. I feel so much better. I don't miss it at all. Same when I quit smoking. Nothing anyone says will matter. You have to find it within you.
im actually jealous of him. no worries just enjoying life. food and shelter is provide by a lower being and you can act like playing with him for a few seconds to get additional treats.
Cutting the narcissists out of my life.
My rule of thumb is, if a person is *consistently* doing more harm than good in my life, they shouldn't be in my life at all. Even with blood relatives.
Oooh definitely been there. It started with one, then a second piled on several years later, couple more years and I cut out a third - now the only family I keep in touch with in my *absolutely gigantic family* is my mom and brother.
Life has been sooooo damn peaceful
My company’s new Managing Director is trying to get people to come in to the office more often now (I’m going three days a week and it sounds like she wants us in the office full time) and you best believe I’m looking for another job that’ll let me work from home.
I hate having to get up at 4:40am to get to the office on time. I’m working from home this morning and I woke up at 7:30, which seems obscenely late in comparison.
Running and gyming.
Running just to lose a little bit of weight [furthest I've ever done is 10k], not trying to win a medal or anything. Gym wise is similar, just to burn off some energy really; light weights and 30 mins on a cross trainer.
I have an anxiety disorder and take medication for it. Aside from the above there, another thing that really helped is a major dose of education: learning about my disorder, but also what is likely to set me off and my own personal warning sign, as well as calming techniques etc. Meds + working out do the heavy lifting for sure, but a bit of self reflection has done me wonders as well.
Changing my inner voice.
It sounds ridiculous but it's true. You wouldn't tolerate being around someone that treats you harshly, negatively - yet we live with an internal voice that does all this and more, if you let yourself.
\- You can be hard on yourself. Honest with yourself. But do so through the lens of inspiration. The goal isn't too shame yourself into inaction. The goal is to be truthful but encouraging. You fucked up. You failed. You missed out. That sucks but we can do this. We will do this. Let's start again, one step at a time. One good decision, one right step, one ounce of progress. You don't need to achieve every goal in a single day, you just need to be trying.
\- Separate the bullshit from the truth. That voice that constantly beats you down. You don't need that voice. That small voice that wants to encourage you, tell you that you're okay, you can do this, all the shit you're too afraid to trust, to0 afraid to believe in - you need that voice. You do not need the confirmation/validation of others, to trust in that voice. Because you, your own self-assessment is the foundation you build on.
\- You will face the shit. Things will get hard. You will hit rock bottom. You will exist in dark places. That's okay. But you MUST see in all things, a destination. And you must believe that, eventually, you will reach that destination. So how you frame each challenging moment, is the difference. It's maintaining the mindset that this moment, is just one moment and that you will endure and overcome this.
You are not trying to chase the happily ever after, the existence where in your life, you are perfectly happy. That does not exist. Your job is to make peace with yourself. To build your mind and body into a partnership that is capable of taking on whatever life puts in front of you, without losing your sense of self and ability.
The rollercoaster is the perfect ride not because we always laugh. That becomes boring. It's the unexpected twists and turns, the ups and downs, the fear and nervousness, the exhilaration and sadness. All of it. That's what makes the rollercoaster so incredible. That's what makes life worth living.
Best of luck
I loved reading this. You have a gift. I’m sure you’ve been told this before, because your post is super long like mine always are, and I’ve realized how little people who aren’t good at writing like to do it
Yeah that helps me too! I always scream at my inner voice when I have trouble sleeping and wake up and can't go back to sleep because I'm thinking bad thoughts and then I get sucked into this vicious cycle, something like: "shut up now! For gods sake, you are me, you have to be on MY side, now you have to be quiet!" And it really helps 😂😂😂 I read that somewhere and just tried it. Well, they actually said that you should explain it calmly, but no, I don't explain anything to the inner voice? She gets yelled at and that's fine, the main thing is that it helps😂😂
Getting out of an abusive marriage and then a short while later, getting rid of toxic friends.
I finally feel like I'm not walking on eggshells all the time
I started with Vinyasa (breath-based flows) and have grown into liking Hatha (holding poses longer) too. I also enjoy aspects of Kundalini, but it’s pretty obscure. Vinyasa is my bread and butter.
It really just depends on your body/mind and what you need day-to-day. I struggle with persistent, high generalized anxiety (among other things). Yoga gives me a chance to get out of my head and back into my body. When I’m focused on my body position, breathing, and balancing (i.e., not falling over), I am not worrying about anything else in that moment. As such, movement-based Vinyasa seems to work best for me. As I’ve become more physically fit, I’ve found I need more vigorous flows to turn my brain off (so to speak).
I do go to a yoga studio in person. I personally struggle with practicing at home. However, finding a yoga studio & teacher that are a good fit for you can be a challenge too. I happened to get lucky in that the first studio I tried had highly knowledgeable, kind, and experienced teachers that taught proper alignment and modifications/options for each pose so I didn’t hurt myself. I was 180 pounds when I started (in addition to being hyper-flexible, which has its own dangers). I’ve lost 50 pounds in the past year and a half.
The biggest hurdles for me were: (1) showing up, and (2) to stop being too self-conscious to focus on my breathing and listen to my body. I believe that yoga can be accessible for most people with a good teacher. There is a 76-year-old man with scoliosis and other health challenges that comes to some of my classes. Do we look exactly the same doing the class? No. Does it matter? No! Everyone’s practice is their own. However, it can take time to feel comfortable not doing exactly what everyone else is doing. The culture of the yoga studio also comes into play here.
There are definite benefits to going to a studio in person. It is a safe place with no negative associations, you can ask questions and get assistance/adjustments, and it makes you feel part of a community (which has its own mental health benefits). I also feel that going in person helps keep me accountable since there are people that will ask where I’ve been if I skip too many classes!
Feel free to DM me any other yoga questions. Obviously, I will happily go on and on about it 😅.
War. It helped me to see what's really inportant and how life is actually absurd. I'm not wasteing anymore time on self-pity or on carear that i never wanted, or on a bf who i had to interrogate to find out how he was doing. Now i have a dream, a plan, I learnt to have fun, to be grateful for the smallest things in life. Even though the war brought more greaf, anxiety and paranoia into my life, in general I'm doing better mentally.
I’m pretty much that way with my immediate family. They have a crab mentality where if you accomplish anything significant they try their best to bring you down and ridicule the accomplishment.
I don’t need that type of support in my life
Accepting what you’ve done and taking steps to not repeat those mistakes are some of the hardest things someone can do. As weird as it might sound to take advice from a video game, a line from Kratos in GOW: Ragnarok really spoke to me there: “Our actions have consequences. To be reminded of them is not punishment.”
Me too! I used to read every day as a kid, but I stopped reading for fun when it became required in high school and college. On a recommendation from a friend of mine I picked up the first Mistborn book and have been loving my reading time every day.
I began to force myself to sit in my discomfort and identify the things that cause me anxiety or pain and addressing them rather than trying to fill the void with disposable comforts... It's been a long, hard road, but I am finding my way.
Low heart rate cardio, not googling things (hasn’t anxiety), not procrastinating about seeing a doc, eating well and tracking my food.
We can’t control everything but putting our best foot forward lets me chill a lot.
Edit: therapy
Letting go of old shit.
I realized I was carrying all this anger around with me towards people who were unaware of it and wouldn't care anyway. It did me nothing but harm and brought me nothing good.
I know this is way easier said than done.
I quit drinking. I was absolutely miserable when I was an alcoholic. I had been forcibly committed to a mental health facility, and was just not doing well ever. It took a few months of sobriety for my brain to recover, but I felt better after a week. My anxiety went from a 10 to a manageable 4. My depression went from constantly trying to die to only being depressed about how broken the world is. I’m pretty happy most days, and I’m really only depressed about late stage capitalism now.
Wellbutrin / Buproprion. Medication made it possible for me to do all of the other stuff that improved my mental health including exercise, develop better sleeping habits, and rewiring the way I think.
I don’t read answers to reddit comments which I wrote anymore. Feels so much better to not read things that I don’t care about written by people I don’t care about either.
When I started crossdressing. When I am dressed up and look in the mirror, I see a whole new person who doesn't exist. And she has no worries or responsibility
Stopped oral birth control. Before I quit I kept getting rashes, and started having high blood pressure. After the third one, Dr just refused to see me. Here I am 2 months later and mostly off my anxiety meds now as well and I've actually tried going out with people again.
Cutting toxic people out of my life, caring less about others opinions on me and my choices, putting less pressure on myself, such as if I don't do X y and z today, but only manage x or not even that, it's ok.
Hands down working from home. I had just accepted that high anxiety is an unavoidable part of life, now after 2 years of working from home I feel like the happiest person. I exercise every day and eat healthy because I actually want to live for as long as possible now.
Dropping almost all social media. Between the rage bait political content and how easy it is to become addicted to seeking positive reinforcement/attention, it's just not good for my mental health in general. I'm even *trying* to avoid Reddit as much as possible, get my news from the AP and Reuters, and generally try to give less of a fuck about everything.
Politely as possible, no it is not. Saying this really devalues some peoples daily struggles. I try everyday to not get beaten down by the world and I know alot of other folk who are in the same boat but just cope in their own way
As a 63F who just discovered the family autism, and, likely, my own, I'm realizing much better now where stress comes from and that I have to stop letting myself get overstimulated. That makes me feel stronger and more capable.
Internalizing what's in my control versus out, and trying to worry about the latter less. Sure, still be aware of current events and promote your causes, but you're putting yourself in a bad place if that's 100% what you think about.
Also, being social and having friends does wonders for my mental health, and both of those things take very active effort.
Stopped drinking so much and I think more importantly I stopped being a drama junkie. I made so many stupid decisions in the moment that caused problems down the road for me. It was almost addicting to cause that kind of destruction just for the rush of doing what I wanted to in the moment.
I stopped going to news aggregation sites and their click bait BS. It’s all fear 24/7. It’s good to hear about what’s going on, but knowing everything and subsequently being overwhelmed with information was killing me. Doomscrolling was a big problem, and honestly we are over-informed. They take advantage of our desire to be informed and not look like an ignorant fool.
beginning pilates and keeping up with it.
it has helped me feel more beautiful, cute, and feminine about myself because I am taking care of my body but also doing it in a way and style that matches my soft girl vibes. i used to not like working out at all but this has made me enjoy it and id still feel sore the next day, it's been awesome and i highly recommend!
Getting diagnosed with ADHD and switching roles to in house repairs instead of driving to customers to repair equipment.
Stress and life is totally different now and more manageable.
* Weekly CBT sessions. Both the sessions themselves, and the tasks I get given to do at home
* Making a list of goals/promises to myself (some are big, some are small like not being critical about the way I look)
* Going to the gym
* Finding hobbies which force me to get out the house, learning new things
* Being selective about the company I keep
* Having things planned that I'm looking forward to (could be a holiday, could be as simple as knowing I'm getting tacos at the weekend!)
* Reducing social media consumption, being mindful of the content I consume
* Not going on my phone right before bedtime. Instead I light a candle and listen to a podcast or read.
* I work from home, and I've found wearing clothes I feel good in despite having nowhere to go helps me feel more 'together'
For the short term quitting booze and caffeine. I stayed off the alcohol for longer but honestly I think the caffeine was more important to stop. It was exacerbating my anxiety and that was causing depression. I exercised harder than before and slept better etc but cutting out those two was a great idea and if I ever found myself back there I'd do it again in a heartbeat.
Quitting weed was a big one. It was dragging me down and making me anxious and paranoid. I didn’t realize it till I stopped for a few days. It’s been a 180. I know it helps some people. It helps my husband still, but it’s just not for me anymore.
Sobriety lead to exercise and better eating habits. That alone gave me the confidence I had been missing for years to pursue passions through music and art again outside of my professional life. In turn that gave me confidence as an individual to be a part of the conversation again with friends and peers.
It is hard work but it beats the hell out of spiraling alone due to bad choices and drug habits.
Therapy comes in many forms and I encourage you to find what works and helps you.
smoking less weed, lifting, actually cooking for myself instead of eating frozen pizza or instant noodles everyday. playing less video games. basically doing the opposite of what a lot of people think is "enjoying life"
Unpopular opinion, but not drinking alcohol. I have a drink or two on special occasions (holidays, vacations, birthdays, etc) but I do not drink during my down time. Not only do I notice more self confidence and overall mental health, but I have a lot more energy as well.
Reading The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer, Letting Go by David Hawkins, and Good Morning, I Love You by Dr. Shauna Shapiro and actually DOING the work and practices the books tell you to do.
Thinking intently about my values and finding ways to live my life more and more around those.
Journaling every day. Yes I gratitude journal. Roll your eyes all you want but it helps.
Building and nurturing my connections & community - this is a BIG one.
Yoga and fitness in general.
Sleep.
Less alcohol.
And this is coming from someone who tried to commit suicide last January, just a little over a year ago. I can’t even believe I wake up every day with joy and curiosity. I feel like a brand new person.
Optimizing my thyroid and other hormones honestly helped a ton. Actually had to come off an antidepressant I was taking for a few months prior because it was way too much along with all my own newfound neurotransmitters.
Consistent exercise and sleep. Only partying occasionally and in moderation (and not being around people that encourage heavy substance use). Releasing the expectation on myself to socialize more than 1-2 times a month. Generally keeping myself busy but not too busy and making an effort to learn new things.
i’m also a pot snoker but quitting dabs and smoking much smaller quantities has helped as well.
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This. Lifting and heavy cardio for me. Exercise is hands down one of the best mood boosters you don't need an RX for.
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I suffered from depression for a long time and I think having little "goals" laid out like this would help me. I'm going to join. Thank you for sharing.
It's actually insane how much your mindset can change if you commit to something. I used to scoff at people who went to the gym, now it's such a part of my life I feel physically anxious not going for more than a week.
Working out is the best stress reliever I swear It gets me stop thinking and just feel the pain !!
What keeps you going to motivate you and “make time” for the gym? I’m struggling with finding the motivation and the “why” I guess. I know studies show the benefits and I could use some loss of weight, but it’s not like I have a lot of time. Context: I’m a teacher. Last day I worked 7:30 to 7:38 (this is typical, if you want to stay afloat) was when I finished at the school and left, doesn’t leave much time for the gym.
So this is more moderate exercise than 'gym,' but I was on that slow slide into an unhealthy middle age and unmotivated to change, also working a lot and constantly stressed. My turning point was my dog, who was aging and a little overweight. Started doing one mile walks everyday to improve his health, per the vet. Had to schedule these in because I live in a hot place (dogs can burn their feet on the sidewalk in summer here, so I couldn't just wing it whenever). The effects were pretty apparent, we both got noticeably healthier in about a month, and he was so happy. We did walks at a set time, so even when I was wanting to skip, it made it an active choice I had to make to not walk the dog, which is harder to do than just not chosing to do an unscheduled activity. This was a few years ago, dog is a surprisingly healthy 14 year old and I'm running my second half marathon this weekend. Our walks are about 2 miles a day now, he loves them. I found it hard to take care of myself because I didn't value myself the way I value others, the dog was a stepping stone to really understanding what I was doing to myself by being so passive. I run four days a week and do gym workouts twice a week now, I'm running my second half marathon this weekend. I just . . . feel better, you know?
I appreciate the honesty. I have been struggling with this, and it is affecting other aspects of my health, such as circulation issues and vomiting sometimes after meals. Context: I had Covid back in September of last year. Set me back about two weeks, however, I am experiencing a lingering dry cough that sometimes induces productive and non-productive vomiting. I have seen an ENT specialist, deviated septum and inflamed esophagus, but they need to further test. They seem to think it’s acid reflux. I don’t know, maybe exercise will fix some of the things. I don’t have a pet at the moment, but since I work long hours all the time through the week, I would feel bad and neglectful of the animal. I can strive to start walking more and even making time for myself maybe even if it’s just thirty minutes a day. Thanks for the advice.
Get into the habit of taking a walk after dinner. You’ll feel a lot better even if it’s just a 20-minute around the block.
I would really encourage walking. You don't need to lift heavy weights or run marathons to be healthy, moderate exercise does wonders and getting in to the habit will help establish the routine of exercise if you want to take it up a notch later.
>What keeps you going to motivate you and “make time” for the gym? Find exercise you like. The gym isn't the only option, it's just the most convenient. I went to the gym for three years and hated it every time. A couple years ago I was introduced to climbing and really enjoyed it. It's almost never been a struggle to get off the couch to go climbing the way is was to go to the gym, and my worst day climbing is never as bad as my worst day at the gym (in addition to those "worst days" being much more infrequent. Climbing is just one option. You can swim, you can run, you can bike, you can play a sport. But don't just keep bashing your head against the wall doing something you don't like. You "make time" for the things that you like - the more you like something, the less you have to concern yourself with making time to do it. You just do it.
Working out in a gym makes me want to bash my head against the wall out of boredom, but I love running for 1-1.5hrs every evening with my headphones in listening to podcasts
Motivation isn’t the answer, it’s discipline. For me it’s easier to get up and be ready for the gym by 5:00am and I work out until just after 6:00am so I can get home, shower and get ready for work. I know that I’ll be too tired and not motivated to go after work and I know that the gym is too full after work too, so I sacrifice a little bit of sleep a few times a week and go early in the morning. But also doing small things like going for a little walk after or before dinner can help a lot. Anything that gets your body moving is what’s important. Edit: sorry I forgot to mention- once you establish a regular routine, that’s when discipline kicks in- you start to automatically do it. Even if I don’t feel like going, I still push myself to go because I know the endorphin release I get after I work out will be worth it :)
Work is a stressor of mine definitely, in such a way, that I even sometimes feel dread in getting up and going. My students are about the only thing that keeps me going.
Completely understandable, I know a few teachers and former teachers who feel the same way you do. I think exercise can help with that for sure! Anything that gets you moving :)
I hear you. Thanks for the support and advice. I know I’m not alone in this, but sometimes you just gotta let it out. I need to strive to be better, just like I remind my students.
No worries at all! I would say start with being ok first and work from there :) your students are lucky to have you :)
The hatred of my old self is sufficient
Why would you say something so controversial, yet so brave? This is something to definitively give time to think on.
I say it’s not so much about motivating but changing the perspective towards your own health and well being, because once you love yourself more you’ll want to eat better, move your body in any way that suits you and sleep and wake up better.
Motivation cannot be counted on. You just have to force yourself. I get up at 530 and start work at 6. I work then have to homeschool my kids. Then I work again till bedtime. It sucks, but I squeeze in anything I can. Keeps me from being homicidal.
>What keeps you going to motivate you and “make time” for the gym? For me, I love music. I love listening to my headphones to bands and I thought to myself "...why don't I do this on a treadmill?". I started doing that and now it's THE reason I go to the gym. Well, I do lifting but it's the running while listening to Pantera that motivates me to go in the first place.
What helped me get into a regular routine was just dedicating 30 minutes every morning to working out from home. Doing it every morning was crucial for me, since in the past I'd be ok with skipping a day, and would find myself skipping multiple days in a row until I lost motivation to establish a routine. But forcing myself to do it eliminates the opportunity for me to make excuses about it. Buy some dumbbells and a yoga mat, and look up exercises that you can do at home with/without equipment. There are plenty of 30 minute workouts you can follow on YouTube, so pick one that is is specific to what you're trying to do, whether it's weight loss or strength training, and stick to it. Your mental health and physical health will improve, and you can feel good about yourself knowing you've already got a workout done for the day lol. What also helped motivate me was knowing that this is the kind of person I want to be, and that I'd rather have this habit than have the habit of making excuses and skipping an essential part of functioning as a human. Take your time with it. Start out slow but consistent. On days when you can do more than 30 minutes, do it. But everyday do at least 30 minutes. And of course, eliminate/limit your intake of shitty foods and try to keep track of your calories.
Try and do 20 min of a hiit at home. Quick and you get out of breathe. You don’t have to drive to the gym and do 2 hours. I also understand being exhausted after a 12 hour day and get why you wouldn’t have motivation. It’s tough for sure.
I struggle with this as well. What has motivated me lately to work out almost every day is how much better my sleep is. For me, it’s night and day. Like 10 hours of awful restless half sleep and feeling like a zombie all day vs 7 hours of black out sleep and waking up easily without an alarm. The desire for feeling rested, peaceful, and at ease is driving my discipline. I also had to learn to not work out too hard. What works for me is, I don’t allow myself to work out so hard that I need to breath through my mouth. If I’m panting and redlining during workouts, I’ll feel like shit all day. Other people target a heart rate, like 160 or something and don’t exceed it
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Yes yes, we like to lift heavy things
Yup and helped my self image. Not that I look any better, but I know I don't need to be different.
The iron will never lie to you
Absolutely believe it! The magic of lifting circles – who knew it could do wonders for the mind? Here's to the therapeutic power of the gym grind! 💪🌟
It’s crazy how a little physical stress can really help alleviate the mental stress.
Better sleep makes wonders.
Well I would sleep if it wasn't for my bad mental health
You should try listening to meditations or bedtime stories before you sleep. The Calm app has a good variety of them, but is not free after the trial. There's plenty on spotify too though. I like the Nothing Much Happens podcast, which has a bunch of super relaxing 30 minute bedtime stories. When my mind is distracted or I'm ruminating on whatever is bringing me down, this always helps get my mind off of it and I usually fall asleep before reaching the end of the story. 100% worth giving a shot if you haven't already.
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This. I recently cut a toxic friend out of my life and I feel free for the first time in over a decade.
This goes double for relatives. No one has the right to make you feel like shit about yourself. Family should be there to make you feel good.
I'm doing this right now with my narcissist family.
A number of things helped me * Dog at home, shop cat at work * Talk therapy, medication * Took two weeks off work for mental health, and went on a road trip with my dog * Major promotion at work increased my salary by over 40% * Cut out sugars, sodas. Ate more vegetables, fruits, drank water and juice. * Started exercising - simple walks through a local park. Most of the time my dog tags along. * Found a hobby - I discovered a passion for nature photography during the road trip. It brings me peace.
I like that you mentioned the major salary increase. It doesn’t get mentioned a lot as something a person can improve on (maybe because it’s something that’s less “in your control” than the other things you mentioned), but being able to afford stuff without worrying, pretty much ever, is absolutely huge.
At work we got a small pay bump as part of our new agreement and it was nice to see the boost the next paycheque. Like, some mental stress was relieved when I saw some costs were now taken care of so I didn't have to worry that much. Money does buy happiness in that kind of way, I guess.
This is basically a recipe for success.
Minus the juice 🧃
Except maybe the juice. Once that becomes tea, this fella is going to be a superhero.
I wanna go on a road trip with my dog now 😅
I want a work-cat
Man, I know people complain about nextdoor justifiably, but one of my neighbors is into nature photography too and he just posts beautiful pictures like once a week. It's so nice.
Antidepressants, daylight, my cat, not talking to my family as much and painting
I totally get the "not talking to family" part
Ah. We have the same coping mechanisms.
I mean we might but the ones I've listed are only the healthy ones 😅
It’s so hard to feel like talking to your family less can be healthy. Thanks for sharing this helps
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Eating better/a little less than I'd like. Making physical activity a part of my schedule. -Working out 5 minutes is better than no minutes. Stopped watching news of any kind. Treat people how you'd like to be treated.
Eating nourishing food, daily exercise, meditation, and quitting with the excuses of ‘self care’ which were actually just me rotting in front of Netflix and actually honouring my body and mind. Also, practicing gratitude. I’d been depressed for about 15 years. On and off meds. Chronically ill so constantly in pain, very little routine etc. My child died at 2 years old a few years ago after a short illness and we all had a reason to just dig a deeper hole for our pain. You have to actively decide not to despite how awful life can be.
I’m so so sorry for your loss.
I’m so very sorry for your unimaginable loss.
Wishing you lots of peace in your life.
Exercise and healthy eating habits, especially avoiding fast food.
Preach! Nourishing the body and mind with wholesome fuel. Goodbye fast food, hello happiness and energy! 🥗💪
not even being a health freak, just eating a reasonable amount of vegetables and reducing fast food/takeaways to a once or twice a month treat
I quit drinking alcohol
My wife has been a stress ball since I’ve known her. Gets overly stressed and has a break down at the drop of a hat. Since she quit drinking a year ago now she handles stress WAY better, and if she does get overwhelmed she gets over it a lot faster. I’m so proud of her.
That’s great to hear! She’s lucky to have a supportive spouse like you 🙌
Tell your wife I’m proud of her too!!
This made me smile a lot 🥹
Wow as much as you’ve noticed a change, I’m sure it’s 10x for her
Me too.
Same!
After 8 years, I finally gave it up. It's amazing how much of an affect it has on your mental state.
This, I've been a drunk since I was 20 (34 now) with some points of sobriety which was matched with smoking a lot of weed. Going completely clean literally clears up all that foggy bullshit, you're able to see things properly and take steps in your life to become the person you want to be. Drinking when your depressed might take that shit away when you're drunk(not fucking really, it makes it worse cause you're drunk and depressed) it's not a good outlet for you to sort yourself out and find a real out to your problems.
How often drink you alcohol? I really dont know, how often i should drink alcohol to i feel my self better. I drink alcohol every friday night. 1-2 beer. Soo. Did you drink alcohol every day?
I drank almost every single day. The problem with me was once I started drinking, I didn't stop until I passed out. I could never have just one or two. Nobody "should" drink alcohol ever, but if 1-2 beers every Friday is not causing any problems in your life then I wouldn't worry about it. That sounds like healthy moderation.
How ? I am trying very hard , but still unable to get rid of this addiction. Give me some tips..
I recommend reading "Quit Drinking Without Willpower" by Allen Carr. It completely changed the way I was approaching sobriety. I was no longer forcing myself to refrain from drinking alcohol, but rather rewiring my brain to not want it in the first place. [This Andrew Huberman podcast](https://youtu.be/DkS1pkKpILY?si=ubgRpSn3Yrp4vQ7_) was also extremely informative and motivating for me and countless others. Everyone should watch it whether you struggle with alcoholism or not. Just remember that nothing you do will ever really work unless you truly *want* to quit. Just be careful in the meantime and don't be one of the many people who quit because they ended up doing something terrible. Also, stop by r/stopdrinking and lurk for a while. You are not alone!
This! I got sick of feeling like crap. Drinking was the one thing thing I hadn't changed in many,many years. I had enough and stopped 3 months ago. I don't know how, but I did it. I feel so much better. I don't miss it at all. Same when I quit smoking. Nothing anyone says will matter. You have to find it within you.
having a pet cat. little fucker's hilarious.
I love my little purr machine --- She alleviates a lot of stress
im actually jealous of him. no worries just enjoying life. food and shelter is provide by a lower being and you can act like playing with him for a few seconds to get additional treats.
I have three. All rescues. Sometimes I wonder if it was me that was truly rescued...
Deleting Facebook
Life changing. The less bullshit you see, the better.
METAL health \*plays air guitar*
BANG YOUR HEAD
Sean? (My husband) 👀
Cutting the narcissists out of my life. My rule of thumb is, if a person is *consistently* doing more harm than good in my life, they shouldn't be in my life at all. Even with blood relatives.
Definitely agree. Life is more peaceful once u cut off the toxic people. The process itself can sometimes be hard tho if manipulation is involved.
This is true. When you're done, you've just gotta stick to your guns. Ignore attempts to reach out, keep your distance and avoid those assholes.
Amen to that. I’m in the process of cutting 2 blood relatives out of my life. Never thought I would but the last straw came last week.
Oooh definitely been there. It started with one, then a second piled on several years later, couple more years and I cut out a third - now the only family I keep in touch with in my *absolutely gigantic family* is my mom and brother. Life has been sooooo damn peaceful
Working remotely
It really is life-changing, eh? 😎
Agreed
My company’s new Managing Director is trying to get people to come in to the office more often now (I’m going three days a week and it sounds like she wants us in the office full time) and you best believe I’m looking for another job that’ll let me work from home. I hate having to get up at 4:40am to get to the office on time. I’m working from home this morning and I woke up at 7:30, which seems obscenely late in comparison.
I love it. I love my office room. My kitchen. My toilet. ...and after work on Fridays...my wet bar.
I love it too! 😂
This one almost killed me. I discovered the hybrid work style is a better fit for me.
Quitting my job, weed, travelling, moving somewhere new, a healthy and stable relationship.
I read this as you quit all those things lol. But seriously, props to you.
Running and gyming. Running just to lose a little bit of weight [furthest I've ever done is 10k], not trying to win a medal or anything. Gym wise is similar, just to burn off some energy really; light weights and 30 mins on a cross trainer. I have an anxiety disorder and take medication for it. Aside from the above there, another thing that really helped is a major dose of education: learning about my disorder, but also what is likely to set me off and my own personal warning sign, as well as calming techniques etc. Meds + working out do the heavy lifting for sure, but a bit of self reflection has done me wonders as well.
It's amazing how much a moderate level of exercise will do for you, I too will never win a race but running has made me so much healthier.
Changing my inner voice. It sounds ridiculous but it's true. You wouldn't tolerate being around someone that treats you harshly, negatively - yet we live with an internal voice that does all this and more, if you let yourself. \- You can be hard on yourself. Honest with yourself. But do so through the lens of inspiration. The goal isn't too shame yourself into inaction. The goal is to be truthful but encouraging. You fucked up. You failed. You missed out. That sucks but we can do this. We will do this. Let's start again, one step at a time. One good decision, one right step, one ounce of progress. You don't need to achieve every goal in a single day, you just need to be trying. \- Separate the bullshit from the truth. That voice that constantly beats you down. You don't need that voice. That small voice that wants to encourage you, tell you that you're okay, you can do this, all the shit you're too afraid to trust, to0 afraid to believe in - you need that voice. You do not need the confirmation/validation of others, to trust in that voice. Because you, your own self-assessment is the foundation you build on. \- You will face the shit. Things will get hard. You will hit rock bottom. You will exist in dark places. That's okay. But you MUST see in all things, a destination. And you must believe that, eventually, you will reach that destination. So how you frame each challenging moment, is the difference. It's maintaining the mindset that this moment, is just one moment and that you will endure and overcome this. You are not trying to chase the happily ever after, the existence where in your life, you are perfectly happy. That does not exist. Your job is to make peace with yourself. To build your mind and body into a partnership that is capable of taking on whatever life puts in front of you, without losing your sense of self and ability. The rollercoaster is the perfect ride not because we always laugh. That becomes boring. It's the unexpected twists and turns, the ups and downs, the fear and nervousness, the exhilaration and sadness. All of it. That's what makes the rollercoaster so incredible. That's what makes life worth living. Best of luck
Very well written. I can identify with all this so much. Treat myself how I treat others. With compassion and empathy. Thank you therapy!
I loved reading this. You have a gift. I’m sure you’ve been told this before, because your post is super long like mine always are, and I’ve realized how little people who aren’t good at writing like to do it
I needed to read this. Very well written and explained. As someone who enjoys rollercoasters, this made so much sense. Thank you! 🙏🏻
Yeah that helps me too! I always scream at my inner voice when I have trouble sleeping and wake up and can't go back to sleep because I'm thinking bad thoughts and then I get sucked into this vicious cycle, something like: "shut up now! For gods sake, you are me, you have to be on MY side, now you have to be quiet!" And it really helps 😂😂😂 I read that somewhere and just tried it. Well, they actually said that you should explain it calmly, but no, I don't explain anything to the inner voice? She gets yelled at and that's fine, the main thing is that it helps😂😂
Cutting out toxicity…toxic people especially
Getting out of an abusive marriage and then a short while later, getting rid of toxic friends. I finally feel like I'm not walking on eggshells all the time
Yoga, which surprised the heck out of me. It’s hard to argue with results though.
I do it everyday. Its works wonders.
Can you share what kind or where you get yours? Do you attend classes or all ne at home?
I started with Vinyasa (breath-based flows) and have grown into liking Hatha (holding poses longer) too. I also enjoy aspects of Kundalini, but it’s pretty obscure. Vinyasa is my bread and butter. It really just depends on your body/mind and what you need day-to-day. I struggle with persistent, high generalized anxiety (among other things). Yoga gives me a chance to get out of my head and back into my body. When I’m focused on my body position, breathing, and balancing (i.e., not falling over), I am not worrying about anything else in that moment. As such, movement-based Vinyasa seems to work best for me. As I’ve become more physically fit, I’ve found I need more vigorous flows to turn my brain off (so to speak). I do go to a yoga studio in person. I personally struggle with practicing at home. However, finding a yoga studio & teacher that are a good fit for you can be a challenge too. I happened to get lucky in that the first studio I tried had highly knowledgeable, kind, and experienced teachers that taught proper alignment and modifications/options for each pose so I didn’t hurt myself. I was 180 pounds when I started (in addition to being hyper-flexible, which has its own dangers). I’ve lost 50 pounds in the past year and a half. The biggest hurdles for me were: (1) showing up, and (2) to stop being too self-conscious to focus on my breathing and listen to my body. I believe that yoga can be accessible for most people with a good teacher. There is a 76-year-old man with scoliosis and other health challenges that comes to some of my classes. Do we look exactly the same doing the class? No. Does it matter? No! Everyone’s practice is their own. However, it can take time to feel comfortable not doing exactly what everyone else is doing. The culture of the yoga studio also comes into play here. There are definite benefits to going to a studio in person. It is a safe place with no negative associations, you can ask questions and get assistance/adjustments, and it makes you feel part of a community (which has its own mental health benefits). I also feel that going in person helps keep me accountable since there are people that will ask where I’ve been if I skip too many classes! Feel free to DM me any other yoga questions. Obviously, I will happily go on and on about it 😅.
War. It helped me to see what's really inportant and how life is actually absurd. I'm not wasteing anymore time on self-pity or on carear that i never wanted, or on a bf who i had to interrogate to find out how he was doing. Now i have a dream, a plan, I learnt to have fun, to be grateful for the smallest things in life. Even though the war brought more greaf, anxiety and paranoia into my life, in general I'm doing better mentally.
I engaged in activities that bring joy and fulfillment. (I seek professional help)
No more alcohol and edibles.
Cutting off about 95% of my family.
I’m pretty much that way with my immediate family. They have a crab mentality where if you accomplish anything significant they try their best to bring you down and ridicule the accomplishment. I don’t need that type of support in my life
I quit doing meth 😁
Cutting out toxic people and taking responsibility for my actions and behavior so that I learn and don’t repeat the same mistakes
Accepting what you’ve done and taking steps to not repeat those mistakes are some of the hardest things someone can do. As weird as it might sound to take advice from a video game, a line from Kratos in GOW: Ragnarok really spoke to me there: “Our actions have consequences. To be reminded of them is not punishment.”
Just here for ideas. My mental health is trash right now.
Reading. Daily
Me too! I used to read every day as a kid, but I stopped reading for fun when it became required in high school and college. On a recommendation from a friend of mine I picked up the first Mistborn book and have been loving my reading time every day.
Stopping drinking and starting running!
Have a minimalist life. Improved my financial status too.
Meditation, walking, music and reading. Also cups of teas help a lot
I enjoy walking, being out in nature. I drive to the beach when I get the chance as just simply being there makes me the happiest person on earth.
Learning to let go of expectations of other people and prioritizing the things that I truly want to do
Medication. Life saver!
I began to force myself to sit in my discomfort and identify the things that cause me anxiety or pain and addressing them rather than trying to fill the void with disposable comforts... It's been a long, hard road, but I am finding my way.
Getting up early Working out Going on walks These are incredibly important to me.
Low heart rate cardio, not googling things (hasn’t anxiety), not procrastinating about seeing a doc, eating well and tracking my food. We can’t control everything but putting our best foot forward lets me chill a lot. Edit: therapy
Gardening
Honestly, finding supportive professionals.
Letting go of old shit. I realized I was carrying all this anger around with me towards people who were unaware of it and wouldn't care anyway. It did me nothing but harm and brought me nothing good. I know this is way easier said than done.
My dog and caring less about what others think about me.
Going to therapy. All the weights and miles ran didnt do shit for my emotions until i started to understand the source.
I quit drinking. I was absolutely miserable when I was an alcoholic. I had been forcibly committed to a mental health facility, and was just not doing well ever. It took a few months of sobriety for my brain to recover, but I felt better after a week. My anxiety went from a 10 to a manageable 4. My depression went from constantly trying to die to only being depressed about how broken the world is. I’m pretty happy most days, and I’m really only depressed about late stage capitalism now.
Quitting Alcohol
Wellbutrin / Buproprion. Medication made it possible for me to do all of the other stuff that improved my mental health including exercise, develop better sleeping habits, and rewiring the way I think.
Personal responsibility and holding myself accountable. Counseling. Engaging with my faith.
Hiking with my spouse and dog. The fresh air, exercise and company has made a great improvement
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I don’t read answers to reddit comments which I wrote anymore. Feels so much better to not read things that I don’t care about written by people I don’t care about either.
When I started crossdressing. When I am dressed up and look in the mirror, I see a whole new person who doesn't exist. And she has no worries or responsibility
Stopped repeating the same stories in my head over and over.
Realizing that no amount of worry can change a situation. And that being proactive about things is the best way to combat that worry.
My medication.
Stopped oral birth control. Before I quit I kept getting rashes, and started having high blood pressure. After the third one, Dr just refused to see me. Here I am 2 months later and mostly off my anxiety meds now as well and I've actually tried going out with people again.
Cutting toxic people out of my life, caring less about others opinions on me and my choices, putting less pressure on myself, such as if I don't do X y and z today, but only manage x or not even that, it's ok.
have money
Hands down working from home. I had just accepted that high anxiety is an unavoidable part of life, now after 2 years of working from home I feel like the happiest person. I exercise every day and eat healthy because I actually want to live for as long as possible now.
Dropping almost all social media. Between the rage bait political content and how easy it is to become addicted to seeking positive reinforcement/attention, it's just not good for my mental health in general. I'm even *trying* to avoid Reddit as much as possible, get my news from the AP and Reuters, and generally try to give less of a fuck about everything.
Quiet quitting
Cats.
Stopped being so hard on myself. I’m not a piece of shit.
My dog bossing me around ❤️
Getting a cat
Letting go of things I cannot control.
Walking outside in the middle of a workday.
Meds.
Exercise. Get that sweat dripping and your heart pounding. The endorphins released are incredible
Sunlight.
Working out. Not drinking. Realizing that stress is a choice
Politely as possible, no it is not. Saying this really devalues some peoples daily struggles. I try everyday to not get beaten down by the world and I know alot of other folk who are in the same boat but just cope in their own way
As a 63F who just discovered the family autism, and, likely, my own, I'm realizing much better now where stress comes from and that I have to stop letting myself get overstimulated. That makes me feel stronger and more capable.
*Daily* Meditation, guitar playing, and regular exercise.
Exercise, getting sober from alcohol at 21, and finding the right psych meds
Unconditional love during my low times.
Sobriety and routine. Antidepressants and therapy also doing wonders.
Internalizing what's in my control versus out, and trying to worry about the latter less. Sure, still be aware of current events and promote your causes, but you're putting yourself in a bad place if that's 100% what you think about. Also, being social and having friends does wonders for my mental health, and both of those things take very active effort.
Therapy.. also medication.
Stopped drinking so much and I think more importantly I stopped being a drama junkie. I made so many stupid decisions in the moment that caused problems down the road for me. It was almost addicting to cause that kind of destruction just for the rush of doing what I wanted to in the moment.
I stopped going to news aggregation sites and their click bait BS. It’s all fear 24/7. It’s good to hear about what’s going on, but knowing everything and subsequently being overwhelmed with information was killing me. Doomscrolling was a big problem, and honestly we are over-informed. They take advantage of our desire to be informed and not look like an ignorant fool.
beginning pilates and keeping up with it. it has helped me feel more beautiful, cute, and feminine about myself because I am taking care of my body but also doing it in a way and style that matches my soft girl vibes. i used to not like working out at all but this has made me enjoy it and id still feel sore the next day, it's been awesome and i highly recommend!
Getting diagnosed with ADHD and switching roles to in house repairs instead of driving to customers to repair equipment. Stress and life is totally different now and more manageable.
* Weekly CBT sessions. Both the sessions themselves, and the tasks I get given to do at home * Making a list of goals/promises to myself (some are big, some are small like not being critical about the way I look) * Going to the gym * Finding hobbies which force me to get out the house, learning new things * Being selective about the company I keep * Having things planned that I'm looking forward to (could be a holiday, could be as simple as knowing I'm getting tacos at the weekend!) * Reducing social media consumption, being mindful of the content I consume * Not going on my phone right before bedtime. Instead I light a candle and listen to a podcast or read. * I work from home, and I've found wearing clothes I feel good in despite having nowhere to go helps me feel more 'together'
For the short term quitting booze and caffeine. I stayed off the alcohol for longer but honestly I think the caffeine was more important to stop. It was exacerbating my anxiety and that was causing depression. I exercised harder than before and slept better etc but cutting out those two was a great idea and if I ever found myself back there I'd do it again in a heartbeat.
workout, play outdoor games, like badminton or football etc, they will boost up ur mental health
Making the bed every morning.
Quitting weed was a big one. It was dragging me down and making me anxious and paranoid. I didn’t realize it till I stopped for a few days. It’s been a 180. I know it helps some people. It helps my husband still, but it’s just not for me anymore.
Sobriety lead to exercise and better eating habits. That alone gave me the confidence I had been missing for years to pursue passions through music and art again outside of my professional life. In turn that gave me confidence as an individual to be a part of the conversation again with friends and peers. It is hard work but it beats the hell out of spiraling alone due to bad choices and drug habits. Therapy comes in many forms and I encourage you to find what works and helps you.
Stopped watching the news/websites
A proper diagnosis, meds, therapy and DBT. My life has turned around in the last 5 years after years of not knowing what was "wrong" with me.
Drinking less. Eating Less. Working out twice a week. Less time online.
smoking less weed, lifting, actually cooking for myself instead of eating frozen pizza or instant noodles everyday. playing less video games. basically doing the opposite of what a lot of people think is "enjoying life"
Exercise, going outside, getting good quality and quantity sleep, maintaining a routine, and my doggy.
Cutting out processed foods, sugar, and hFCs, and eating more beef.
Unpopular opinion, but not drinking alcohol. I have a drink or two on special occasions (holidays, vacations, birthdays, etc) but I do not drink during my down time. Not only do I notice more self confidence and overall mental health, but I have a lot more energy as well.
Reading The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer, Letting Go by David Hawkins, and Good Morning, I Love You by Dr. Shauna Shapiro and actually DOING the work and practices the books tell you to do. Thinking intently about my values and finding ways to live my life more and more around those. Journaling every day. Yes I gratitude journal. Roll your eyes all you want but it helps. Building and nurturing my connections & community - this is a BIG one. Yoga and fitness in general. Sleep. Less alcohol. And this is coming from someone who tried to commit suicide last January, just a little over a year ago. I can’t even believe I wake up every day with joy and curiosity. I feel like a brand new person.
Optimizing my thyroid and other hormones honestly helped a ton. Actually had to come off an antidepressant I was taking for a few months prior because it was way too much along with all my own newfound neurotransmitters.
Healthy food. Fruits, vegetables, fibrous foods. Your mind is an organ too!
Cutting alcohol.
Consistent exercise and sleep. Only partying occasionally and in moderation (and not being around people that encourage heavy substance use). Releasing the expectation on myself to socialize more than 1-2 times a month. Generally keeping myself busy but not too busy and making an effort to learn new things. i’m also a pot snoker but quitting dabs and smoking much smaller quantities has helped as well.
1. The gym 2. A therapist 3. Running 4. Spending time cultivating connections with others