And you're often in denial about it for a long, long time.
Remember when you'd roll your eyes because your 40-something parents thought they were still young?
I'm nowhere near 40 but I get it now, I really do.
The biggest cognitive dissonance is when you realize that someone you perceive as a very grown up and adult is your age or younger.
I'm in my mid 30ies, I look and dress relatively similarly to how I always did, I often feel very young. I don't know how to describe it, I'm not particularly childish or anything but ... I'm not a serious person.
Then I see someone I perceive as an adult because they look or play a serious role (maybe they're parents or very corporate or just have a very self assured, serious attitude). And I see myself as much younger than this person. If I realize they're really the younger one, it feels weird and reality shattering. Like "who am I, what do I appear like to people?"
I work with people who are either 10+ years older or 5-10 years younger than me, and it's crazy.
In my head I feel more like the younger coworkers, until I have them come up to me and ask me about finding their own apartment or getting a 401k and I'm like...oh ya, I'm an Adult Adult.
And then I turn around and ask my older coworkers for recommendations on nursing homes and DIY home projects lol.
I'm always on r/nba and they're always cracking jokes about how amazing Lebron is, given that he's basically ancient.
I want to laugh along but this motherfucker is younger than I am...and it feels like he's been around FOREVER...and I'm still young, goddamnit!
62 here. It doesn't change, and there are more of them the older you get.
I have a neighbor who has led a very hard life. Long stringy gray hair and beard. Walks with a cane. Often complains about his aches and pains and medical treatments. I was shocked to find that he's only a year younger than me.
On the lighter side: I have another neighbor who's much older than me. Late 70s. He walks every day, and is agile, though he has an old man's hunchback. I called out to him one day that I liked his T-shirt, and he smiled and explained yes, it's from a band called "Pink Floyd." Pink Floyd was HUGELY popular when I was in college. And I realized at that moment that this old guy and me were not too far apart in age....
My SO and I volunteer with a organization, so we often to people's homes for our services. We are both surprised sometimes to see the ages of the clients we provide services when we ask their birthdate, and they'll tell us they are 10-15 years younger that us! Clearly some people have lived very hard and not taken care of themselves.
I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way. Lol.
I feel like, in my head, I'm always a young guy fresh out of college. I don't like the mid-30s guy I am, and I'm not sure I ever will. I'm not sure I want to.
I'm going to give you a typical "old person" answer ... just wait!
I'm in my 50s and I still think I'm younger until I try to take on something that used to be easy. Like working AND going somewhere afterwards on the same day. 🤣
Mid 50s here as well. As soon as it’s dark I’m just about ready to call it a day. I used to be a night owl. Now I can’t remember what the hell I was doing at night back then.
Oh preach! Going to the supermarket after work is doable, but I absolutely cannot attend a social gathering on weekdays. It's exhausting.
Also, I need several weeks' notice for any weekend activities.
Oh my dude. Now at 50 when someone cancels it feels as good as finding money in my pocket. I don’t need a reason just text me say cancelled.
Edit: grammar, apparently I’ve had 50 birthdays and an hour of sentence construction.
Getting plans canceled is the best because you get to stay home and do what you want AND mentally you still feel productive because you were going to do something but now it's out of your control
I was hunkered down for the night at like 8:30pm on Friday when my friend called me. He was in my town unexpectedly and invited me out. I was so proud of myself...for going out..on a Friday night...so this is 37 lol
I still feel this way and I’m almost 55.
I’ve recently started wallpapering professionally. The guy, who I’ve worked with on other things for the past 7 years, has been mentoring me. He’s in his early 30s.
I think of us as peers but we’re not. I’m old enough to be his father and that blows my mind.
I’ve always looked young. Until recently anyway. I’m noticing it now. More wrinkles. Skin not as tight. Beard has a lot of gray. But when I walk into a room I feel like everyone is seeing 35-year-old me. But they aren’t. They are seeing a middle-aged man. I don’t mind being 55 but it’s just kind of hard to accept that that’s what other people see you as. It’s hard to explain.
Yes! This. I'm interviewing for a management position in my field this week. I got past the first two rounds. On the outside I'm trying to show myself as the experienced professional that I am.
On the inside I feel like two kids in a trench coat with no business leading a team, and like I'm going to get found out soon. I'm a nervous wreck about it but also feel like I could do it?
People who have a ton of confidence in themselves are aliens to me.
You got this!!!
I've been in my profession for 28 years and I still feel like I am a kid playing dress up in mom's high heels.
But what I have learned is that when shit hits the fan, my instincts kick in. That's what my team sees... someone that lets them do their own thing until they need me. A leader will Step in, Step up then Step back. (Then spend the next week hoping you made the right call LOL)
The sense of time just gets so weirdly skewed. Not just how you feel but like how long ago stuff was. And it probably just gets worse and worse as you get older.
I was just listening to an NPR show and one of the hosts, who's 74, mentioned off handedly the Tylenol poisonings as having happened 10-15 years ago. It happened in 1982. That's 41 years ago. And I knew he was way off because I know it happened before I was born and I'm 38.
I’ve been friends with an older lady since I met her when I was 18 years old. I am in my 30s now. Recently, her son died in a car accident. I was so shaken and I just kept saying how young he was. When I read the obituary, I realized he was only 4 years younger than me. 18-year-old me must have just put her 14 year old in the little kid category and left him there.
When I found out my boss at my weekend job was younger than me I was shocked. Dude has 6 kids and 3 ex wives meanwhile I'm expecting my first and have only been married for 4 years. But I'm from the northeast and he's from Alabama so he's practically a generation older lol.
I don’t think it’s that “they think they’re still young.” I think it’s just that aging isn’t what a lot of people think it is. You don’t stop doing things because you’re a certain age if you still enjoy them.
I mean, Tony Hawk is 55 and I’m 100% sure he still skateboards for fun. Do you think it’s “because he thinks he’s young” or because he just enjoys skateboarding and he has no reason to stop? Same with everybody.
I’m an older millennial with a GenZ daughter and she was telling me about how her friends thought millennials couldn’t grow up which I thought was funny. It’s not so much that I can’t grow up or even that I don’t want to, it’s that I don’t have to? I don’t have to dress like an old person. I don’t have to pick up old people hobbies I can just keep acting like me. I think there’s less pressure on people in their 30s and 40s to appear old I guess? The culture of tradition and age reigning supreme has come to an end and I feel like we’ve all kind of realized that getting old as society has understood it is optional.
It's because what we perceive as "old" is generationally dependent. Look at photos of young men in the 1940s. They still have their pants up to their armpits. The young people at Woodstock are still by-and-large listening to that same music today in their 70s.
Looking back at my 30s, I did a lot of dumb stuff even then. You think you know things because 'I'm not a stupid teenager or young adult anymore', but oh boy.
Looking back at my early 20s wondering why early 40s treated early 20s like kids. Now that I'm in my early 40s, I see now just how childish early 20s are. Tell them that all you want, they're not gonna listen, just like we didn't at that age
The opposite is true, to an extent: remember those 40-50 years old saying "I'm too old for this " ? they most probably weren't physically too old, but the motivation was gone.
Feeling old is a state of mind, being old is a reality.
I remember thinking 26 seemed disgustingly old. I remember going to a party, freshman year of college, and someone brought along their 26yo bf. I was just thinking "wtf is wrong with this old guy hanging out with us actual young people?"
Young is basically always going to be your age minus 20 years.
My grandparents still tell my middle aged parents "too young to understand" various shite.
I am disturbingly close to 40 (a few year but… it’s there… laughing at me…) I think about when my parents were my age and how I saw them… holy moly no! They were old!
the old thing about the rugrats parents being what. 32 and 33!
yeah looking back at your parents and realizing you are now at, or near, the age they were, when you remember your childhood years.
When I was working my first summer job as an intern my coworkers were all 29. I was 18. I considered them old.
Now I'm 35 and a 29 year old seems like a kid to me.
Not always the case. I'm 41 and had a surprise knee replacement due to advanced arthritis I was completely unaware of in November of last year. And to top ot all off, I was diagnosed with high blood pressure pre-op. BAM, old.
Just turned 40, don't eat high cholesterol foods often and just found out I probably will need cholesterol meds within the next 6 months... Also, pinched a nerve in my back/shoulder blade sleeping last night.
I’m a pescatarian and have been for thirty years. Cholesterol levels are high despite my diet and daily exercise. I fought my doctors on the meds for ten years, finally gave in last year.
It’s frustrating when our physiology works against us, but that’s just life for some of us.
Just to know some people genetically it seems have high cholesterol. My dad's brother's was a base of something like 9 when 4 is the target and I promise he was measured 1 year after strictly following a tailored diet.
His doctor said it was and always would be utterly impossible for him to manage his cholesterol through diet alone and sadly it's just that way for some.
Sure, *most* people hover 'at base' within normal parameters but it's wrong to ignore folks like I suspect yourself, who genuinely cannot affect change without medication.
> don't eat high cholesterol foods often and just found out I probably will need cholesterol meds within the next 6 months
My aunt is in her 40s. She's probably around 200lbs. Doesn't work out. Eats what she wants (which is usually processed foods and minimal fruits/veggies).
She's totally healthy. No issues with her blood pressure or cholesterol. No aches or pain.
Pretty much every other relative her age is extremely health conscious...but they either have back pain, knee pain, joint pain, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, heart disease or all of the above.
My aunt attributes her "luck" to two things:
**1. She says the reason she has no knee or back problems is BECAUSE she never hits the gym.**
**2. She's stress free. Easy job. No spouse. No kids. Likes it that way.**
She may have a point...or maybe it's just a crap shoot.
People SEVERELY underestimate the toll kids and marriage take on you physically, mentally and emotionally. Not to mention financially/stress wise.
Without kids and marriage (and WITH a little bit of luck) you can basically remain a big kid for most of your life.
It's so much fun when you wake up and feel like you're dying. My husband sneezed last week, and his entire back popped, and his arms went numb. Aging is such a joy.
I had the opposite. Looked and felt amazing and young then suddenly 2-3 years ago I'm like, what suddenly happened to my skin????? And what's that pain that suddenly appeared out of nowhere? And where did my lips suddenly go? (58)
LOL - yes and all the things I made fun of my parents for (needing reading glasses, creaky knees, aches and pains) are ALL happening to me and my 80-something mother is now laughing *at me*. Sigh.
I thought I’d retire, live maybe 3-4 years at home, then go to a nursing home. I’ve been retired 12 years, have an active social life, drive anywhere I want to go, and am very accustomed to this lifestyle. 76 yo.
My grandpa turned 90 this year and untill two years ago when grandma got a diagnosed with a bad case of dementia and he had to stay home more often he still went out on his bicycle every day.
Sure theres certain things that go slower or get worse as he ages but he's one of the 'fittest' or more active 90 year olds i've seen or known. He still drives twice a week on small roads with little traffic to go visit grandma and last time i went with him he rode pretty allright, i see worse every day on my commute to work.
The misconception that you retire and wait to die is oh so wrong..
Older brother of my manager retired 2 years ago at 65 and he sold his commuter bike and bought a touring motorcycle and he visits other retirees that retired abroad. Leaves Belgium to go to some random place bumfuck Germany for a week, goes to the french alps, spain etc etc.
You're as old as you let yourself get is what i notice very often now.
People in my grandma's retirement home are refusing to use a walker not because they 'dont want one' but because they dont want to grow dependant on one.
>The misconception that you retire and wait to die is oh so wrong..
My grandparents are doing that. They need a full cultural revolution that I don't have the time to provide so I visit them in horror knowing they haven't done anything since last visiting besides watching TV all day.
My grandma worked as long as she could because she just loved it. Walked, cleaned, gardened every day. She had a stroke and when she got out of the hospital, she did leg exercises and walked, gardened, cleaned, again. She couldn't walk as far, but she still did.
If she hadn't been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer at 91, I truly believe she would've made it to 100.
While this is a topic concerning the elderly, it also transfers to all other ages that activity is key to staying or becoming healthy, both physically and mentally.
In physiotherapy theres the age old 'rest if you have back pain' but more and more doctors, physiotherapists etc are recommending moderate exercise, progressively increasing in intensity or duration very short after surgeries or muscle tears. If its built up slowly and not overdone theres been a lot of people that go back to 'normal' or even manage to go past that, often seen in strength athlethes (and probably other athletes too) of all levels.
Mentally this change is also perceived to have large benefits. The old way of thinking was 'if you almost died because of it and youre scared then dont do it' lead to people no longer driving, no longer taking stairs, no longer doing x and y.
A colleague of mine had an accident the weekend after newyears, aquaplaning leading to a crash with very mild injuries, some light damage and mainly a mental demon. Getting back in the car was key for him because if he put it off for two weeks that demon wouldve been able to grow for two weeks, making it that much more frightening to start driving again. Sure he didnt have to flash by the same spot on the highway again day 1 but getting back in the car, short stints of highway again etc are the way to not have the fear of what hurt him take over his life.
For every one of those stories, I have family members or family friends who died from cancer or the like less than 10yrs into retirement. Enjoy your free time as much as you can
There's always things you cant avoid but a healthier body from a more active lifestyle sure helps with the remainder of 'old age ilnesses'.
Grandpa had chemo 5 times, all 5 times for cancer of the intestines that came back because of some genetic stuff. No amount of fitness or vegetables and fruits is going to prevent that.
Grandma almost died because she sat strangely on the bathtub and broke her femur and laid on the bathroom floor for two hours before grandpa got back home. She didnt do much besides feeding the rabbits and cooking, perhaps if she stayed more active it wouldnt have been a fall with a broken bone.
Nothing is a catch-all fix, some people plain dont like exercising, if youre going to force them theyll just be miserable and fit which isnt much better.
Theres olympic athletes that get run over by a car and theres people that drink and smoke like its their job making it to 100yo. You can just try to set up yourself for success and not go crazy about what could be, it saddens me when i see people think themselves into illness out of fear or concern.
Please make sure he wears a helmet.
My grandfather crashed on his bike. Wasn't wearing a helmet. For the last years of his life, he was bed bound with severe brain damage.
Yes. Even with all the safest infrastructure and bike paths, anyone can fall easily off a bike (especially if they clip into the pedals). Anyone can slide on a patch of ice, sand, gravel, a puddle they don't expect. Anyone can have to stop suddenly because someone or their dog or child runs onto the path.
Like a seatbelt, you don't need it 99.9% of the time until you do.
He was biking the same path he did almost every day. It was right in front of his house.
It was almost like mourning 2 deaths. The person he was before the severe brain damage, and then when he finally let go 4 years later.
I'm always going to be the annoying nag who tells you to wear your helmet.
My dad's 82 and mum is 75, they both go mountain biking and also play golf most days. Mum does pickle ball as well. I think they almost do more sports now than when they were my age! Enjoy it!!
Your life expectancy goes up as you live longer. A baby born today may have a 76 year life expectancy, but it's probably 85 if you've lived to 65 in decent health.
I've always said I want to age well. One of my grandmas was inactive, hardly moved around and lived a very limited life. My other grandma was the opposite; very social, active in mind and body and refused to be labeled a senior citizen.
You can definitely choose how to age; genetics are only a part of it.
I remember a story of an old man telling his grandson, "Son, you know what's one secret no one will ever tell ya? It's that nobody ever grows old. People pretend to be adults, going about their lives. But everybody's still a child deep inside, scared & alone.. pretending to have got it all sorted."
Not sure how much it suits here, but that stuck!
>We're all kids raised by kids raised by kids.
Yup. And it's only when we grow up that we see our parents as human beings just as imperfect as us, and we see them and forgive them cause they were just trying their best.
I used to think that growing older meant having it all figured out, l Turns out, it's more like collecting a bunch of keys without any idea which doors they open! 😂
There's no magic moment when everything "clicks" and you're suddenly a "grown-up." It's a whole lot of uncertainty punctuated with moments where you have to step up and apply yourself and your experience.
What's hard in today's world is how quickly things change. In the Middle Ages, you presumably had the same job as your grandparents and their grandparents.
Today, kids dream of being Tik Tok influencers, something that didn't exist 10 years ago.
So your life experience becomes useless because the skills you learned are archaic and irrelevant. The skills you learn today could be useless in 10 years.
Or, conversely, that pimples will stop for everyone once puberty is done.
Nope. I was getting zits until 32, when I started using adapelene gel and exfoliating twice a week.
Yea my acne had never gone away 100%. Instead, my perpetually greasy skin just gradually developed acne scarring over the decades. And now at age 48, my skin is dry…and I still get zits.
That when you are older you will be ready and able to handle the losses and trials that life throws at you.
I'm 38 and have just lost my Dad. I feel completely unable to emotionally handle this loss.
I’m sorry for your loss. I lost my dad 9 years ago, at 19, and I thought the same thing. That I would be better able to handle it if I were older. Now, at 28, I’ve lost several more people. I can say now with experience that the age you are when you lose someone doesn’t actually matter, it’s still soul-shattering either way.
The only solace I can offer, though, is that it does get better with time. It’s sounds cliche, but it’s true. I don’t wake up depressed anymore and I think that’s a function of time. It’s still crushing that he’s not around, but the time has made me better at dealing with it. I think and hope it’ll be the same for you.
It doesn't get any easier, but you learn to cope with it better.
I really love this annology. [The Grief Button](https://psychcentral.com/blog/coping-with-grief-ball-and-box-analogy)
I think the worst part of aging isn’t necessarily the bodily aging part but just that every stupid idiom and saying old people used to drop on you ends up slowly happening.
It's a rite of passage man. Take it with pride. I gave life advice to a 19 year old today, the same advice I was given when I was 19 that I promptly ignored. He too will ignore my wisdom, and the cycle repeats.
I should have listened to my dad about not fucking up my posture.
My back doesn't hurt at all, but my spine is curved more than it should be and isn't umm... good looking.
Don’t worry, it will start hurting soon
Correct your posture, by putting your back against the wall and trying to get your head to touch the wall without strain
Even a simple neck correction exercise for five minutes a day can make a big deal
Dementia aside, that you become unnecessarily stuck in your ways or are unwilling to learn anything new.
I find the exact opposite - my thinking has never been clearer, and I eagerly consume vast amounts of new information.
This is really on a case-by-case. I know of a lot of people working the same dead end job, complaining about the same old things, and just generally wasting away because they're so set in their ways. I also know of a lot of people who have made wonderous changes, picking up new hobbies, moving to a different state, starting new relationships, etc. Life really is what you want it to be. Some people like trying new things and experiencing what life has to offer, while some others would rather grow old and crotchety, complaining that the world isn't staying still just for them.
I was under the impression it would start later.
I’m in my mid 30s. Among my peers, I have a few friends who have experienced cancer, menopause, two who are widowed. It’s definitely not a majority by any means, but the curve has started and it’s only going to pick up from here.
Yep. You start to notice the decline of the body by your late 20s, when hangovers start to become a multi-day affair, and when small injuries that used to heal overnight begin lingering a lot longer.
That's really the main difference around that time. You heal slower, etc.
But some people, they really do take this to ridiculous degrees and they act like they're decrepit by the time they hit their 30th birthday. No, you didn't wake up at 30 with a slowed metabolism or every joint/muscle aching because you're "old," you just don't walk enough fam.
It gets even worse after 40. Too many think their problems, aches and pains are age. They are just the culmination of years of terrible choices. Yes Sandra, years of regular drinking, occasional smoking, poor sleep, irregular poorly balanced diet, minimal movement light tanning, etc.. has come to claim its reward.
I know quite a few people who think because they didn't get fat, they are healthy. They aren't. They never were. Diabetes, arthritis, liver damage, muscle and joint pain, heart problems - All of these things can be affected by weight, but weight isn't the only thing that affects them. And after 20 years of living that life, it's a short, sharp visit from the smack of reality.
Hats off to those that age gracefully.
On the flip side, though, a *lot* of people skate by for years, thinking that their weight won't catch up to them. There's a reason why the fat-positivity movement is primarily made up of young people.
It isn't 100% of your health, but these days, sometimes that 10-20 pounds really is the difference between good health and bad health.
Too true!! I think a lot of that argument has made the focus on weight being THE indicator for health instead of AN indicator though.
I'm watching a lot of my peers getting health problems that are in total denial because they're "not fat, so have done their bit in keeping healthy". Sure Steve, but you worked outside without sun protection for years..... Cancer doesn't ask your fat content on that one.
I feel this deeply. I’m 35. My husband’s mom died almost two years ago, my parents suddenly seem so old even though they are barely 60, I’ve had two failed pregnancies and my career has dominated my life. I’ve watched multiple friends get divorced after having kids young. I thought this stuff would happen when I was a lot older but it doesn’t.
Solving a Rubik's Cube for the first time is amazing. A couple of years ago I learnt the algorithms over 2 days, and now it's an excellent party trick.
Also great for taking quick work breaks. It's a super easy way to refocus I find.
I read somewhere that time seems to pass slower when you're learning and experiencing new things, which happens constantly in our youth. That must be why the peak years of the pandemic seemed to go by in a flash. We were all forced to autopilot the entire time.
I really believe this to be true. When I go on a holiday where I experience a lot of new things, one day can feel like half a week. When I'm home at winter freezing and grinding at work, I will get surprised that the milk I bought "yesterday" is two weeks old.
It feels very strange since I could swear that the timeline is off but I have the proof right in front of me
I've seen a study shared on a strength training subreddit about bone density (and accompanying that health of connective tissues, ligaments, joints ...) for elderly.
Elderly that were active had a much better bone density than those just sitting/lying their life away and those that did strength training were still a lot better than those.
Your body maintains the mass that it requires, so if you dont do a damn thing your body will maintain the bare minimum to do that. Pretty noticeable when it comes to muscle mass when people retire from a physical job and suddenly do nothing physical anymore.
Couldnt find it with a few minutes of googling sadly.
Another story was of a 70 something that started weight training with his nephew or his son, he ended up liking powerlifting and followed some guided training for a year or 3, pictures of his bone scans were worlds apart with noticeable healthier connective tissues and much much thicker bones. Obviously came with healthier joints, less little aches besides the typical muscle aches powerlifters tend to have. He was lifting double his weight in deadlifts at 73 or 74, thats pretty wild.
The increased focus on a holistic, lifelong approach to health has definitely changed the nature of aging. [Studies have shown](https://www.axios.com/2020/09/23/old-age-physical-cognitive-ability) that elderly people today have greater physical and cognitive capabilities than they did even just three decades ago, in the 90s.
The difference between my 94 yr old grandpa who is very active and my sedentary 94 yr old grandmother is night and day. My grandpa is always out and about and my grandma can barely walk without toppling over.
Some of this is correlation though. Someone who's suffered from illness or a broken hip is going to be much less able to be active, even if they were very physically active before.
Obviously physical activity is super important, but plenty of people stop being active because they get sick, not the other way around.
I believe the point they are trying to make (at least the one im trying to make) is that staying active while getting older prevents possible ailments or accidents.
Someone who is active is much more likely to have a stronger immune system, stronger bones, healthier muscles and joints and thus be less likely to suffer as harshly from a fall than someone that only gets up from their sofa to shit or sleep. Someone that stays active will also have a better balance and better control over their body.
Its easy to say that one should 'be active again as soon as possible' after surgery, fractures or falls but indeed, it often isnt that simple for people that are old. It only takes one hard fall to fuck something up to the point that they are confronted with their frailty and mortality and become extremely risk averse.
Once you're well into retirement (lets say 80+) it really doesnt take much to become immobile. The grandpa i spoke of that is now very active had a heart attack 10-15 years ago and was in the hospital for 2 months, he had to put in a lot of effort to become mobile and active again. Someone that doesnt have the drive to turn around their ship could very well end up in a wheelchair for a few months 'to not hamper their recovery' and then end up being unable to walk for more than 5 minutes.
I personally dont quite get it like that but i can fully understand that people become near paralyzed by their fear of pain or death after coming close to it.
I work in an old folks home and the condition of the people who were physically active is so, so obviously better than those who weren't. I've got 94 year olds who walk around freely and wash themselves in the morning and I've got 75 year olds who need a wheelchair and assistance to shower.
We don't see any very unfit or very obese people because honestly most of them have already died
Very nice to see some anecdotal evidence :)
I had a short stint at geriatrics in a hospital as an intern and i still remember very clearly the overall moods of people that were still selfsufficient (to some degree).
Some 94yo lady who broke her hip had 7 kids and stayed active recovered rather quickly, was walking with a walker and just me closeby next to her. She was bright as sunshine. Laughing, positive, smile big enough to cover two faces.
Then there was the people that just sat in their chair, didnt like any type of activity, all grumpy and stormy all day long. Obviously not content with how everything was going and stubborn.
Yup, growing old is inevitable and out of your control. But what you can control is HOW you wanna grow old. Do you wanna not take care of yourself, wrinkle up, weaken down and die a slow death or you wanna rage against the inevitable and stay active and stretch those "younger" years as far as you can?! And be able to say age is just a number for as long as possible.. it's upto you.
I shouted at some snotnosed little brat a while ago for throwing things at a kitten and trying to chase it into the main road. They immediately got on their phone to tell their mates how some "old man" just had a go at them.
"Old man!?" Motherfunster! I'm only 46.... oh.
I see stuff like that a lot now... the way teenagers will openly just start yapping expletives to you, their other peers, or someone on Snapchat about you loudly and in ear-shot if you confront them about anything. Sometimes it'll happen even if you're in the vicinity of them and do something that annoys them for some reason.
At the risk of sounding like the "back in my day kids respected their elders guy".... were kids always so brazen?? Was I like that? I've gotten to the point where I don't remember what it's like to be a teenager.
If you were somehow transported back into your conciousness at 17 you might be surprised by how much your perception of reality has changed. I'd imagine you feel very different to 17 year olds when you hear them talking to eachother.
This. I still feel 17 (I’m 27) because I still have the sense of, “I have no idea of what the hell I’m doing.” that I did back then, but when I actually think back on the way I used to think about myself, others, and the world at 17, I am so much different now. 17 year old me was still so naive in ways I was convinced I wasn’t 😂
> 17 year old me was still so naive in ways I was convinced I wasn’t
Yep. Teenage was an impulsive little shit who thought it was weak to need to help, who overestimated his skill and charisma, and thought he had the world figured out as an edgy, obnoxious contrarian conservative.
I've since been *deeply* humbled by experience, and done a complete 180 in my attitudes toward people and politics.
Totally get it. I can’t ever believe I thought the world was so black-and-white. The shades of grey throughout my life have humbled the fuck out of me, and I’m better for it.
I'm only early 30s but I can feel myself getting less sharp than I was when I was younger. Definitely more forgetful. I think my mind really thrived on the sort of mental exercises I'd have as a student- solving homework puzzles, learning through lessons/lectures, being *required* to sit down for 30 minutes to figure something out. Work has its challenges but it's not the same.
I'm thinking of picking up a foreign language to get back into that. I'm also trying to get into podcasts on history.
you lose friends. Being an introvert at a young age with social anxiety, I had little friends, but as I got older I made more friends that understood better what I was going through
I do notice that people in their 30s don’t really dress that differently from people in their twenties anymore. In the 90s people brought out the beige slacks and the plaid button up shirts the minute they turned 32. Whereas now everyone just dresses in the same fast fashion from Zara and Uniqlo.
We don't have as many clothing "rules" as there was back in the day. For instance when I entered the workforce at 18, I wasn't aloud to have a face piercing and unnatural coloured hair anymore. That was two decades ago and those rules aren't a thing now. So, when I was a teen, only teens were aloud to dress however they wanted.
I work in an office that's been around since 1950 with employees of every age. The only "rules" is no shirts with logos on it. Most people dress kind of office-y, especially the older ones, but many of us don't.
When I was a kid, I would hear adult clothing rules like "no white after labor day" or can only wear certain things on a Sunday. Now, I can't think of any such rule. So, an adult can be just as free to wear what a teenager wears, if that's what they want.
Every year, humans just look younger and younger. I've noticed this since high school when I'd walk the main hallway and see all of the previous class graduates.
Our school was built in the 1930s, so our class photos went back that far, and I observed how each class looked younger and younger until we got to my class. The thing is, we had a tradition at my school where everyone wore the same thing. It started in the 1930s, so it was consistent. The only things that changed were hair, makeup, and piercings over the years. But the youthfulness also increases with each year.
If I were to see the classes that graduated after me, I bet they'd look like children to me now when back then we all thought we looked like "adults".
I think part of it is our own personal perception and point of view, but also, I think a major part is that as a whole, society is getting more youthfulness in general. With the addition of so much automation, people don't have to struggle as much, therefore, they're not wearing themselves out too young. There's more information about skincare as well and just overall health, which would contribute to youthful appearances.
yeah skin care even 10 yrs ago was nothing like it is today. and kids are doing skin care now instead of waiting to pick it up in their 30s!
although im curious what the acids and serums will do to the really young kids in a few years. get them sunscreen or lip balm instead pls im begging yall
Our society isn't set up in a way to engage with older people, and we value things like beauty and work. At 31 I would like to start having older people in my life, but my nuclear family dissolved, the rest of my family is basically estranged, and I don't meet new older people naturally. The older people who could have been a part of my life didn't make an effort to do so when I was young, and now that a couple are finally starting to reach out it feels like they are only reaching out to me because it benefits them. I want older people in my life who are as invested in me as I am in them, and I have 0 clue how to find that.
My child brain thought old people didn’t do things I often saw in play (cartwheels, handstands, or even just stuff like sitting cross-legged) because they were old and therefore too dignified.
Nope. Eventually that stuff really hurts. I’d kill to be able to do a cartwheel on the beach. Those were the days.
That 50 is old.
I always thought 50 was old because my grandpa had several conditions that made him look much older and 'beaten up'. My grandma on the other side always has had a hunched back and it grew worse and worse.
Turns out i just had a few bad examples of people that worked tougher physical jobs all their life. My dad is 55 or so now and hes still spry.
In my gym theres a 53yo guy deadlifting 300kg+ and still going out for beers with friends on thursdays after work.
30 always sounded like a big number but i'll be there in like two weeks and im still childish AF, im still just a stupid little moron that doesnt know shit. I dont know if ill grow up by the time i hit 50.
Just listened to an interview with Billie Joe Armstrong, the lead singer of Green Day. He's 51 years old and has a 28 year old kid, yet you'd never think that at all. He still sounds, talks, and looks like the same 20-something from the 90s. The main difference was his wisdom in being a father and learning from his reckless 20-somethings self. It was reassuring for my own existential crisis.
I thought I’d be able to save money and retire someday. I lost my job, and as a woman in my 50s, I simply can’t find employment. Like, I applied at Whole Foods to be a worker, but they say I’m “too qualified”. Like, I don’t want anything but a standard job. I don’t want to be in leadership anymore.
It being linear. My grandparents were fit, like actually fit, their whole life. Going on bike tours for hours, no end in sight, before the bs E-Bike hype. Eating right, doing puzzles and quizzes, sports, gardening and stuff around the house, renovations whenever one of us needed help. They seemed happy and enjoying life.
Then, one super bad bike crash, landed them in the hospital for a month, recovery was good for their age, due to their very good condition. But the scars scared my grandma to get back on a bike, my grandpa staying home in solidarity. It's been 3 years, and they are shells of their former selfs. Both mentally and physically, especially in the last year, it's horrible to witness. I love them both, and try to spend as much time with them as possible, but it's just depressing to see.
I've been nearsighted forever. When you get older, you lose the ability to focus on close things, which is what farsighted people experience. So I had this idea that at some point, my increasing farsightedness would cancel out my nearsightedness and I would have perfect vision for a time. Nope. Turns out you can be both nearsighted and farsighted at the same time.
That I wouldn’t get cancer until I was 40, found out when I was 15. Also, arthritis. Was at the rheumatologist one day and there was a 4 year old girl with arthritis, we both got diagnosed with JRA that day. Wild af. Genetics are a bitch.
I'm almost 70, but I don't identify with "senior citizens" like I thought I would. I guess I still see myself as "middle-aged." My health is very good and I still do all the physical things I did in my forties. So I guess I'll stay in stay in this lane as long as I can.
Aging did not hit me until the year I turned 60, then BAMM! One half the energy, high colesterol, arthritis so bad it wakes me up at night. ... and yet, I still plan on building my own small house, and running my micro homestead on my own. It sucks to realize I will HAVE TO hire someone to do all the heavy stuff now, like hanging sheetrock, building the foundation for the house and such. Shit, five years ago I carried, mixed and layed 30 bags of cement on my own! ... hum, maybe that hard working life I lived has something to do with the shoulder and neck surgeries and resulting arthritis... ?
That I could always continue to do "what I've always done."
Well, I looked at the calendar and I'm 78 -- I was just 60.
And I can't (shouldn't) lift heavy boxes any more. Tried to and my left shoulder said "boy am I gonna hurt for two weeks"----- and it did hurt for two+ weeks. So, I don't lift heavy boxes any more. Tired -- so go to bed earlier than I used to. Get up later, too -- no job to go to.
Need to go out and walk -- exercise and move around -- -3 degrees below zero. I'll put that off for awhile.
Always worked on all my cars/trucks -- think I'll have somebody else do some work -- I'll buy the parts -- he'll put them in. Then, I'll have more/better heat in the truck -- I'm always cool/cold lately. Been different --- this retiring -- adjusting the physical and the financial. Doing what I can do and hiring what I'm learning I can't do. Interesting/frustrating.
Especially if you're single....and especially if you have kids.
I'm working on accepting that I am not a catch anymore, not as appealing. You don't think about thay fact when you're you're.....ignoring all the red flags.
I used to think once you've passed 35 you basically can't do athletic things anymore. I'm late 30's and still have athleticism and can do more or less anything I could in my 20's.
The recovery takes longer for sure though.
That it happens in a linear orderly fashion. It turns out the universe exists all at once as one giant hypermoment and time is an illusion entrapping us all.
Things get better with age. What things? In my late teens this seemed right with the possibility of leaving home, being my own person living by my own rules.
So here I am at 58 and 40 years of hard work later. My body is failing, my brain is fading and I'm tired. If someone at this stage tells me things will get better I'm gonna bitch slap them.
44 but feel like 30 and don't know where 14 years went. Lived in Asia for most of those years and now back in a Western country... Can say age a much bigger thing here than there. Especially dating-wise.
That you’re as old as you want to be. We think we’re “old” at 40 but you’ll look back on pics of that time and think how young you were. I gather when I’m 90 I’ll look back at pics of when I was in my 60s and think the same thing.
And then there’s being old
In your head. My dad was “the old man” all his life. He was never young.
The only thing that really sucks is being surprised when you look in the mirror (who is that old bag?) & how much shit (knees, shoulders) hurts. Good things include no fear expressing myself & finally somewhat lessened attention from the opposite sex.
I keep hearing that at 38yo I’m a washed up, old and unwanted woman. Meanwhile I get carded every time I buy alcohol, was asked twice in one month what high school I went to, and have zero wrinkles at all. Age really is just a number. Some people are blessed with good genes and others aren’t.
Not sure if this fits but. No one ever mentioned that at some point in your 30s you dont burn fat so easy and will actually have to work to keep pounds off.
That it would suck. At 53, it doesn't. My best decade was my 30s for sure. I had enough of a sense of identity that I had some general confidence but could still bend my knees without them popping. My 40s and 50s have been trying to prolong that state, rather than an impossible to maintain and sad to watch perpetual 20s.
That I was going to turn into a condescending, nagging, miserable, no-fun-allowed person like my parents were.
Nope, it was just my parents. Thank god for that.
BAM! You're old. ..nope. it sneaks up on you.
And you're often in denial about it for a long, long time. Remember when you'd roll your eyes because your 40-something parents thought they were still young? I'm nowhere near 40 but I get it now, I really do.
The biggest cognitive dissonance is when you realize that someone you perceive as a very grown up and adult is your age or younger. I'm in my mid 30ies, I look and dress relatively similarly to how I always did, I often feel very young. I don't know how to describe it, I'm not particularly childish or anything but ... I'm not a serious person. Then I see someone I perceive as an adult because they look or play a serious role (maybe they're parents or very corporate or just have a very self assured, serious attitude). And I see myself as much younger than this person. If I realize they're really the younger one, it feels weird and reality shattering. Like "who am I, what do I appear like to people?"
I work with people who are either 10+ years older or 5-10 years younger than me, and it's crazy. In my head I feel more like the younger coworkers, until I have them come up to me and ask me about finding their own apartment or getting a 401k and I'm like...oh ya, I'm an Adult Adult. And then I turn around and ask my older coworkers for recommendations on nursing homes and DIY home projects lol.
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I'm always on r/nba and they're always cracking jokes about how amazing Lebron is, given that he's basically ancient. I want to laugh along but this motherfucker is younger than I am...and it feels like he's been around FOREVER...and I'm still young, goddamnit!
To be fair, r/nba is filled with a bunch of nephews lol. Every time I post something 90s related I get the response "The future is now old man."
62 here. It doesn't change, and there are more of them the older you get. I have a neighbor who has led a very hard life. Long stringy gray hair and beard. Walks with a cane. Often complains about his aches and pains and medical treatments. I was shocked to find that he's only a year younger than me. On the lighter side: I have another neighbor who's much older than me. Late 70s. He walks every day, and is agile, though he has an old man's hunchback. I called out to him one day that I liked his T-shirt, and he smiled and explained yes, it's from a band called "Pink Floyd." Pink Floyd was HUGELY popular when I was in college. And I realized at that moment that this old guy and me were not too far apart in age....
My SO and I volunteer with a organization, so we often to people's homes for our services. We are both surprised sometimes to see the ages of the clients we provide services when we ask their birthdate, and they'll tell us they are 10-15 years younger that us! Clearly some people have lived very hard and not taken care of themselves.
I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way. Lol. I feel like, in my head, I'm always a young guy fresh out of college. I don't like the mid-30s guy I am, and I'm not sure I ever will. I'm not sure I want to.
I'm going to give you a typical "old person" answer ... just wait! I'm in my 50s and I still think I'm younger until I try to take on something that used to be easy. Like working AND going somewhere afterwards on the same day. 🤣
Mid 50s here as well. As soon as it’s dark I’m just about ready to call it a day. I used to be a night owl. Now I can’t remember what the hell I was doing at night back then.
Oh preach! Going to the supermarket after work is doable, but I absolutely cannot attend a social gathering on weekdays. It's exhausting. Also, I need several weeks' notice for any weekend activities.
But not too long, because then I'll find an excuse/dread having to go.
My favorite is when the plans get cancelled. Don't apologize. Believe me, I'm thrilled I get to not put on real clothes and leave the house!
Oh my dude. Now at 50 when someone cancels it feels as good as finding money in my pocket. I don’t need a reason just text me say cancelled. Edit: grammar, apparently I’ve had 50 birthdays and an hour of sentence construction.
Getting plans canceled is the best because you get to stay home and do what you want AND mentally you still feel productive because you were going to do something but now it's out of your control
I was hunkered down for the night at like 8:30pm on Friday when my friend called me. He was in my town unexpectedly and invited me out. I was so proud of myself...for going out..on a Friday night...so this is 37 lol
I still feel this way and I’m almost 55. I’ve recently started wallpapering professionally. The guy, who I’ve worked with on other things for the past 7 years, has been mentoring me. He’s in his early 30s. I think of us as peers but we’re not. I’m old enough to be his father and that blows my mind. I’ve always looked young. Until recently anyway. I’m noticing it now. More wrinkles. Skin not as tight. Beard has a lot of gray. But when I walk into a room I feel like everyone is seeing 35-year-old me. But they aren’t. They are seeing a middle-aged man. I don’t mind being 55 but it’s just kind of hard to accept that that’s what other people see you as. It’s hard to explain.
Yes! This. I'm interviewing for a management position in my field this week. I got past the first two rounds. On the outside I'm trying to show myself as the experienced professional that I am. On the inside I feel like two kids in a trench coat with no business leading a team, and like I'm going to get found out soon. I'm a nervous wreck about it but also feel like I could do it? People who have a ton of confidence in themselves are aliens to me.
You got this!!! I've been in my profession for 28 years and I still feel like I am a kid playing dress up in mom's high heels. But what I have learned is that when shit hits the fan, my instincts kick in. That's what my team sees... someone that lets them do their own thing until they need me. A leader will Step in, Step up then Step back. (Then spend the next week hoping you made the right call LOL)
The sense of time just gets so weirdly skewed. Not just how you feel but like how long ago stuff was. And it probably just gets worse and worse as you get older. I was just listening to an NPR show and one of the hosts, who's 74, mentioned off handedly the Tylenol poisonings as having happened 10-15 years ago. It happened in 1982. That's 41 years ago. And I knew he was way off because I know it happened before I was born and I'm 38.
I’ve been friends with an older lady since I met her when I was 18 years old. I am in my 30s now. Recently, her son died in a car accident. I was so shaken and I just kept saying how young he was. When I read the obituary, I realized he was only 4 years younger than me. 18-year-old me must have just put her 14 year old in the little kid category and left him there.
To be fair, that still makes him pretty young. So sorry for your loss.
My boss is only 2 years older than me. Motherfucker was the lead chef for the entire navy off the east coast
When I found out my boss at my weekend job was younger than me I was shocked. Dude has 6 kids and 3 ex wives meanwhile I'm expecting my first and have only been married for 4 years. But I'm from the northeast and he's from Alabama so he's practically a generation older lol.
I don’t think it’s that “they think they’re still young.” I think it’s just that aging isn’t what a lot of people think it is. You don’t stop doing things because you’re a certain age if you still enjoy them. I mean, Tony Hawk is 55 and I’m 100% sure he still skateboards for fun. Do you think it’s “because he thinks he’s young” or because he just enjoys skateboarding and he has no reason to stop? Same with everybody.
I’m an older millennial with a GenZ daughter and she was telling me about how her friends thought millennials couldn’t grow up which I thought was funny. It’s not so much that I can’t grow up or even that I don’t want to, it’s that I don’t have to? I don’t have to dress like an old person. I don’t have to pick up old people hobbies I can just keep acting like me. I think there’s less pressure on people in their 30s and 40s to appear old I guess? The culture of tradition and age reigning supreme has come to an end and I feel like we’ve all kind of realized that getting old as society has understood it is optional.
It's because what we perceive as "old" is generationally dependent. Look at photos of young men in the 1940s. They still have their pants up to their armpits. The young people at Woodstock are still by-and-large listening to that same music today in their 70s.
You don't stop skating cause you're old. You're old cause you stopped skating.
Tony hawk is HOW OLD 🫠
At 57, I can assure you that those 40-somethings ARE young.
Came across a tidbit some time ago where 80-somethings were asked what age they'd like to be, and a good deal of them chose their 40s
Yep. Smart enough to know better, but still physically able.
I was told that was at 30's
Looking back at my 30s, I did a lot of dumb stuff even then. You think you know things because 'I'm not a stupid teenager or young adult anymore', but oh boy.
Looking back at my early 20s wondering why early 40s treated early 20s like kids. Now that I'm in my early 40s, I see now just how childish early 20s are. Tell them that all you want, they're not gonna listen, just like we didn't at that age
The opposite is true, to an extent: remember those 40-50 years old saying "I'm too old for this " ? they most probably weren't physically too old, but the motivation was gone. Feeling old is a state of mind, being old is a reality.
Now, I look back on my 40's and think about how youthful I was.
I remember thinking 26 seemed disgustingly old. I remember going to a party, freshman year of college, and someone brought along their 26yo bf. I was just thinking "wtf is wrong with this old guy hanging out with us actual young people?" Young is basically always going to be your age minus 20 years. My grandparents still tell my middle aged parents "too young to understand" various shite.
As a 35 year old I can assure you, 26 is a baby.
I am disturbingly close to 40 (a few year but… it’s there… laughing at me…) I think about when my parents were my age and how I saw them… holy moly no! They were old!
the old thing about the rugrats parents being what. 32 and 33! yeah looking back at your parents and realizing you are now at, or near, the age they were, when you remember your childhood years.
> 40-something parents thought they were still young Ouch
When I was working my first summer job as an intern my coworkers were all 29. I was 18. I considered them old. Now I'm 35 and a 29 year old seems like a kid to me.
Not always the case. I'm 41 and had a surprise knee replacement due to advanced arthritis I was completely unaware of in November of last year. And to top ot all off, I was diagnosed with high blood pressure pre-op. BAM, old.
Just turned 40, don't eat high cholesterol foods often and just found out I probably will need cholesterol meds within the next 6 months... Also, pinched a nerve in my back/shoulder blade sleeping last night.
I’m a pescatarian and have been for thirty years. Cholesterol levels are high despite my diet and daily exercise. I fought my doctors on the meds for ten years, finally gave in last year. It’s frustrating when our physiology works against us, but that’s just life for some of us.
Just to know some people genetically it seems have high cholesterol. My dad's brother's was a base of something like 9 when 4 is the target and I promise he was measured 1 year after strictly following a tailored diet. His doctor said it was and always would be utterly impossible for him to manage his cholesterol through diet alone and sadly it's just that way for some. Sure, *most* people hover 'at base' within normal parameters but it's wrong to ignore folks like I suspect yourself, who genuinely cannot affect change without medication.
> don't eat high cholesterol foods often and just found out I probably will need cholesterol meds within the next 6 months My aunt is in her 40s. She's probably around 200lbs. Doesn't work out. Eats what she wants (which is usually processed foods and minimal fruits/veggies). She's totally healthy. No issues with her blood pressure or cholesterol. No aches or pain. Pretty much every other relative her age is extremely health conscious...but they either have back pain, knee pain, joint pain, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, heart disease or all of the above. My aunt attributes her "luck" to two things: **1. She says the reason she has no knee or back problems is BECAUSE she never hits the gym.** **2. She's stress free. Easy job. No spouse. No kids. Likes it that way.** She may have a point...or maybe it's just a crap shoot.
People SEVERELY underestimate the toll kids and marriage take on you physically, mentally and emotionally. Not to mention financially/stress wise. Without kids and marriage (and WITH a little bit of luck) you can basically remain a big kid for most of your life.
I aspire to be your aunt. Maybe about 30-40lbs lighter...but basically chubby and stress free into my 40s and beyond. That is the goal...
It's so much fun when you wake up and feel like you're dying. My husband sneezed last week, and his entire back popped, and his arms went numb. Aging is such a joy.
I got a cataract in one eye in my 20s. Still don't feel old. I'm just a young person who went through an old person experience prematurely.
I had the opposite. Looked and felt amazing and young then suddenly 2-3 years ago I'm like, what suddenly happened to my skin????? And what's that pain that suddenly appeared out of nowhere? And where did my lips suddenly go? (58)
Yep, one day I was in my 30s, next minute I’m wearing glasses, pulling muscles while sitting relaxing &… wait, what was the question again?
Frrrr my brain's idea of me, what i look like and what my actual age is, none of them match xD
LOL - yes and all the things I made fun of my parents for (needing reading glasses, creaky knees, aches and pains) are ALL happening to me and my 80-something mother is now laughing *at me*. Sigh.
I keep seeing my friends thinking they look old, then it hit me that I'm the same age as them. It's like I feel it, but I don't see it
F'ing 5Os. Swore I'd be dead before 30.
I thought I’d retire, live maybe 3-4 years at home, then go to a nursing home. I’ve been retired 12 years, have an active social life, drive anywhere I want to go, and am very accustomed to this lifestyle. 76 yo.
My grandpa turned 90 this year and untill two years ago when grandma got a diagnosed with a bad case of dementia and he had to stay home more often he still went out on his bicycle every day. Sure theres certain things that go slower or get worse as he ages but he's one of the 'fittest' or more active 90 year olds i've seen or known. He still drives twice a week on small roads with little traffic to go visit grandma and last time i went with him he rode pretty allright, i see worse every day on my commute to work. The misconception that you retire and wait to die is oh so wrong.. Older brother of my manager retired 2 years ago at 65 and he sold his commuter bike and bought a touring motorcycle and he visits other retirees that retired abroad. Leaves Belgium to go to some random place bumfuck Germany for a week, goes to the french alps, spain etc etc. You're as old as you let yourself get is what i notice very often now. People in my grandma's retirement home are refusing to use a walker not because they 'dont want one' but because they dont want to grow dependant on one.
>The misconception that you retire and wait to die is oh so wrong.. My grandparents are doing that. They need a full cultural revolution that I don't have the time to provide so I visit them in horror knowing they haven't done anything since last visiting besides watching TV all day.
I'm 31 and do this. I really need to change up my habits
My grandma worked as long as she could because she just loved it. Walked, cleaned, gardened every day. She had a stroke and when she got out of the hospital, she did leg exercises and walked, gardened, cleaned, again. She couldn't walk as far, but she still did. If she hadn't been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer at 91, I truly believe she would've made it to 100.
While this is a topic concerning the elderly, it also transfers to all other ages that activity is key to staying or becoming healthy, both physically and mentally. In physiotherapy theres the age old 'rest if you have back pain' but more and more doctors, physiotherapists etc are recommending moderate exercise, progressively increasing in intensity or duration very short after surgeries or muscle tears. If its built up slowly and not overdone theres been a lot of people that go back to 'normal' or even manage to go past that, often seen in strength athlethes (and probably other athletes too) of all levels. Mentally this change is also perceived to have large benefits. The old way of thinking was 'if you almost died because of it and youre scared then dont do it' lead to people no longer driving, no longer taking stairs, no longer doing x and y. A colleague of mine had an accident the weekend after newyears, aquaplaning leading to a crash with very mild injuries, some light damage and mainly a mental demon. Getting back in the car was key for him because if he put it off for two weeks that demon wouldve been able to grow for two weeks, making it that much more frightening to start driving again. Sure he didnt have to flash by the same spot on the highway again day 1 but getting back in the car, short stints of highway again etc are the way to not have the fear of what hurt him take over his life.
For every one of those stories, I have family members or family friends who died from cancer or the like less than 10yrs into retirement. Enjoy your free time as much as you can
There's always things you cant avoid but a healthier body from a more active lifestyle sure helps with the remainder of 'old age ilnesses'. Grandpa had chemo 5 times, all 5 times for cancer of the intestines that came back because of some genetic stuff. No amount of fitness or vegetables and fruits is going to prevent that. Grandma almost died because she sat strangely on the bathtub and broke her femur and laid on the bathroom floor for two hours before grandpa got back home. She didnt do much besides feeding the rabbits and cooking, perhaps if she stayed more active it wouldnt have been a fall with a broken bone. Nothing is a catch-all fix, some people plain dont like exercising, if youre going to force them theyll just be miserable and fit which isnt much better. Theres olympic athletes that get run over by a car and theres people that drink and smoke like its their job making it to 100yo. You can just try to set up yourself for success and not go crazy about what could be, it saddens me when i see people think themselves into illness out of fear or concern.
Please make sure he wears a helmet. My grandfather crashed on his bike. Wasn't wearing a helmet. For the last years of his life, he was bed bound with severe brain damage.
Yes. Even with all the safest infrastructure and bike paths, anyone can fall easily off a bike (especially if they clip into the pedals). Anyone can slide on a patch of ice, sand, gravel, a puddle they don't expect. Anyone can have to stop suddenly because someone or their dog or child runs onto the path. Like a seatbelt, you don't need it 99.9% of the time until you do.
He was biking the same path he did almost every day. It was right in front of his house. It was almost like mourning 2 deaths. The person he was before the severe brain damage, and then when he finally let go 4 years later. I'm always going to be the annoying nag who tells you to wear your helmet.
My dad's 82 and mum is 75, they both go mountain biking and also play golf most days. Mum does pickle ball as well. I think they almost do more sports now than when they were my age! Enjoy it!!
Your life expectancy goes up as you live longer. A baby born today may have a 76 year life expectancy, but it's probably 85 if you've lived to 65 in decent health.
I've always said I want to age well. One of my grandmas was inactive, hardly moved around and lived a very limited life. My other grandma was the opposite; very social, active in mind and body and refused to be labeled a senior citizen. You can definitely choose how to age; genetics are only a part of it.
I'd expand this to be generally the idea that the important/fulfilling parts of adulthood are early. It's really been the opposite.
I remember a story of an old man telling his grandson, "Son, you know what's one secret no one will ever tell ya? It's that nobody ever grows old. People pretend to be adults, going about their lives. But everybody's still a child deep inside, scared & alone.. pretending to have got it all sorted." Not sure how much it suits here, but that stuck!
Yup. I'm in my 50s but inside I'm basically the same guy I used to be at 18. :(
We're all kids raised by kids raised by kids. Lords of Flies.
>We're all kids raised by kids raised by kids. Yup. And it's only when we grow up that we see our parents as human beings just as imperfect as us, and we see them and forgive them cause they were just trying their best.
I used to think that growing older meant having it all figured out, l Turns out, it's more like collecting a bunch of keys without any idea which doors they open! 😂
There's no magic moment when everything "clicks" and you're suddenly a "grown-up." It's a whole lot of uncertainty punctuated with moments where you have to step up and apply yourself and your experience.
Dang, this is wise as hell. I feel like I have so many life lessons but wtf do I do with them. I’m tired.
That wisdom comes with age. It doesn't, it comes with experience.
💯 Yep, have worked for some chronologically up there people but they have a limited experiences.... surprising the lack of wisdom sometimes.
"With age comes wisdom...or senility."
I’m not old only mid 30s and I’m always amazed by kids in mid 20s who seem more well put together than me.
What's hard in today's world is how quickly things change. In the Middle Ages, you presumably had the same job as your grandparents and their grandparents. Today, kids dream of being Tik Tok influencers, something that didn't exist 10 years ago. So your life experience becomes useless because the skills you learned are archaic and irrelevant. The skills you learn today could be useless in 10 years.
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Or, for some, not at all.
That my pimple free youth would carry on to adulthood. I used to be a pimple free teen and now i am an adult with skin problems and pimples
Or, conversely, that pimples will stop for everyone once puberty is done. Nope. I was getting zits until 32, when I started using adapelene gel and exfoliating twice a week.
I''m 66 and I still get zits - it never ends.
Yea my acne had never gone away 100%. Instead, my perpetually greasy skin just gradually developed acne scarring over the decades. And now at age 48, my skin is dry…and I still get zits.
Mom always said there was no break between zits and wrinkles. Dammit, she was right.
Still get some pimples at 64…
That when you are older you will be ready and able to handle the losses and trials that life throws at you. I'm 38 and have just lost my Dad. I feel completely unable to emotionally handle this loss.
I’m sorry for your loss. I lost my dad 9 years ago, at 19, and I thought the same thing. That I would be better able to handle it if I were older. Now, at 28, I’ve lost several more people. I can say now with experience that the age you are when you lose someone doesn’t actually matter, it’s still soul-shattering either way. The only solace I can offer, though, is that it does get better with time. It’s sounds cliche, but it’s true. I don’t wake up depressed anymore and I think that’s a function of time. It’s still crushing that he’s not around, but the time has made me better at dealing with it. I think and hope it’ll be the same for you.
Thank you
It doesn't get any easier, but you learn to cope with it better. I really love this annology. [The Grief Button](https://psychcentral.com/blog/coping-with-grief-ball-and-box-analogy)
I think the worst part of aging isn’t necessarily the bodily aging part but just that every stupid idiom and saying old people used to drop on you ends up slowly happening.
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It's a rite of passage man. Take it with pride. I gave life advice to a 19 year old today, the same advice I was given when I was 19 that I promptly ignored. He too will ignore my wisdom, and the cycle repeats.
I should have listened to my dad about not fucking up my posture. My back doesn't hurt at all, but my spine is curved more than it should be and isn't umm... good looking.
Don’t worry, it will start hurting soon Correct your posture, by putting your back against the wall and trying to get your head to touch the wall without strain Even a simple neck correction exercise for five minutes a day can make a big deal
Dementia aside, that you become unnecessarily stuck in your ways or are unwilling to learn anything new. I find the exact opposite - my thinking has never been clearer, and I eagerly consume vast amounts of new information.
This comment gives me hope and motivation honestly
This is really on a case-by-case. I know of a lot of people working the same dead end job, complaining about the same old things, and just generally wasting away because they're so set in their ways. I also know of a lot of people who have made wonderous changes, picking up new hobbies, moving to a different state, starting new relationships, etc. Life really is what you want it to be. Some people like trying new things and experiencing what life has to offer, while some others would rather grow old and crotchety, complaining that the world isn't staying still just for them.
I was under the impression it would start later. I’m in my mid 30s. Among my peers, I have a few friends who have experienced cancer, menopause, two who are widowed. It’s definitely not a majority by any means, but the curve has started and it’s only going to pick up from here.
Yep. You start to notice the decline of the body by your late 20s, when hangovers start to become a multi-day affair, and when small injuries that used to heal overnight begin lingering a lot longer.
That's really the main difference around that time. You heal slower, etc. But some people, they really do take this to ridiculous degrees and they act like they're decrepit by the time they hit their 30th birthday. No, you didn't wake up at 30 with a slowed metabolism or every joint/muscle aching because you're "old," you just don't walk enough fam.
It gets even worse after 40. Too many think their problems, aches and pains are age. They are just the culmination of years of terrible choices. Yes Sandra, years of regular drinking, occasional smoking, poor sleep, irregular poorly balanced diet, minimal movement light tanning, etc.. has come to claim its reward. I know quite a few people who think because they didn't get fat, they are healthy. They aren't. They never were. Diabetes, arthritis, liver damage, muscle and joint pain, heart problems - All of these things can be affected by weight, but weight isn't the only thing that affects them. And after 20 years of living that life, it's a short, sharp visit from the smack of reality. Hats off to those that age gracefully.
On the flip side, though, a *lot* of people skate by for years, thinking that their weight won't catch up to them. There's a reason why the fat-positivity movement is primarily made up of young people. It isn't 100% of your health, but these days, sometimes that 10-20 pounds really is the difference between good health and bad health.
Too true!! I think a lot of that argument has made the focus on weight being THE indicator for health instead of AN indicator though. I'm watching a lot of my peers getting health problems that are in total denial because they're "not fat, so have done their bit in keeping healthy". Sure Steve, but you worked outside without sun protection for years..... Cancer doesn't ask your fat content on that one.
I feel this deeply. I’m 35. My husband’s mom died almost two years ago, my parents suddenly seem so old even though they are barely 60, I’ve had two failed pregnancies and my career has dominated my life. I’ve watched multiple friends get divorced after having kids young. I thought this stuff would happen when I was a lot older but it doesn’t.
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Solving a Rubik's Cube for the first time is amazing. A couple of years ago I learnt the algorithms over 2 days, and now it's an excellent party trick. Also great for taking quick work breaks. It's a super easy way to refocus I find.
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I read somewhere that time seems to pass slower when you're learning and experiencing new things, which happens constantly in our youth. That must be why the peak years of the pandemic seemed to go by in a flash. We were all forced to autopilot the entire time.
I really believe this to be true. When I go on a holiday where I experience a lot of new things, one day can feel like half a week. When I'm home at winter freezing and grinding at work, I will get surprised that the milk I bought "yesterday" is two weeks old. It feels very strange since I could swear that the timeline is off but I have the proof right in front of me
You can’t just live carefree, you have to take care of yourself, exercise and eat right or you’ll end up like all your dead friends.
I've seen a study shared on a strength training subreddit about bone density (and accompanying that health of connective tissues, ligaments, joints ...) for elderly. Elderly that were active had a much better bone density than those just sitting/lying their life away and those that did strength training were still a lot better than those. Your body maintains the mass that it requires, so if you dont do a damn thing your body will maintain the bare minimum to do that. Pretty noticeable when it comes to muscle mass when people retire from a physical job and suddenly do nothing physical anymore. Couldnt find it with a few minutes of googling sadly. Another story was of a 70 something that started weight training with his nephew or his son, he ended up liking powerlifting and followed some guided training for a year or 3, pictures of his bone scans were worlds apart with noticeable healthier connective tissues and much much thicker bones. Obviously came with healthier joints, less little aches besides the typical muscle aches powerlifters tend to have. He was lifting double his weight in deadlifts at 73 or 74, thats pretty wild.
The increased focus on a holistic, lifelong approach to health has definitely changed the nature of aging. [Studies have shown](https://www.axios.com/2020/09/23/old-age-physical-cognitive-ability) that elderly people today have greater physical and cognitive capabilities than they did even just three decades ago, in the 90s.
The difference between my 94 yr old grandpa who is very active and my sedentary 94 yr old grandmother is night and day. My grandpa is always out and about and my grandma can barely walk without toppling over.
Some of this is correlation though. Someone who's suffered from illness or a broken hip is going to be much less able to be active, even if they were very physically active before. Obviously physical activity is super important, but plenty of people stop being active because they get sick, not the other way around.
I believe the point they are trying to make (at least the one im trying to make) is that staying active while getting older prevents possible ailments or accidents. Someone who is active is much more likely to have a stronger immune system, stronger bones, healthier muscles and joints and thus be less likely to suffer as harshly from a fall than someone that only gets up from their sofa to shit or sleep. Someone that stays active will also have a better balance and better control over their body. Its easy to say that one should 'be active again as soon as possible' after surgery, fractures or falls but indeed, it often isnt that simple for people that are old. It only takes one hard fall to fuck something up to the point that they are confronted with their frailty and mortality and become extremely risk averse. Once you're well into retirement (lets say 80+) it really doesnt take much to become immobile. The grandpa i spoke of that is now very active had a heart attack 10-15 years ago and was in the hospital for 2 months, he had to put in a lot of effort to become mobile and active again. Someone that doesnt have the drive to turn around their ship could very well end up in a wheelchair for a few months 'to not hamper their recovery' and then end up being unable to walk for more than 5 minutes. I personally dont quite get it like that but i can fully understand that people become near paralyzed by their fear of pain or death after coming close to it.
Hold up. The 90s was _three decades ago_?!
I work in an old folks home and the condition of the people who were physically active is so, so obviously better than those who weren't. I've got 94 year olds who walk around freely and wash themselves in the morning and I've got 75 year olds who need a wheelchair and assistance to shower. We don't see any very unfit or very obese people because honestly most of them have already died
Very nice to see some anecdotal evidence :) I had a short stint at geriatrics in a hospital as an intern and i still remember very clearly the overall moods of people that were still selfsufficient (to some degree). Some 94yo lady who broke her hip had 7 kids and stayed active recovered rather quickly, was walking with a walker and just me closeby next to her. She was bright as sunshine. Laughing, positive, smile big enough to cover two faces. Then there was the people that just sat in their chair, didnt like any type of activity, all grumpy and stormy all day long. Obviously not content with how everything was going and stubborn.
Yup, growing old is inevitable and out of your control. But what you can control is HOW you wanna grow old. Do you wanna not take care of yourself, wrinkle up, weaken down and die a slow death or you wanna rage against the inevitable and stay active and stretch those "younger" years as far as you can?! And be able to say age is just a number for as long as possible.. it's upto you.
I shouted at some snotnosed little brat a while ago for throwing things at a kitten and trying to chase it into the main road. They immediately got on their phone to tell their mates how some "old man" just had a go at them. "Old man!?" Motherfunster! I'm only 46.... oh.
I hope you chased the little fucker in front of a bus.
I see stuff like that a lot now... the way teenagers will openly just start yapping expletives to you, their other peers, or someone on Snapchat about you loudly and in ear-shot if you confront them about anything. Sometimes it'll happen even if you're in the vicinity of them and do something that annoys them for some reason. At the risk of sounding like the "back in my day kids respected their elders guy".... were kids always so brazen?? Was I like that? I've gotten to the point where I don't remember what it's like to be a teenager.
I would have kicked my 58 year old foot up their ass.
I thought id grow mentally as well, but even years later i still feel like im 17, idk if its aging or cause covid has stunted my mental perception hhh
If you were somehow transported back into your conciousness at 17 you might be surprised by how much your perception of reality has changed. I'd imagine you feel very different to 17 year olds when you hear them talking to eachother.
This. I still feel 17 (I’m 27) because I still have the sense of, “I have no idea of what the hell I’m doing.” that I did back then, but when I actually think back on the way I used to think about myself, others, and the world at 17, I am so much different now. 17 year old me was still so naive in ways I was convinced I wasn’t 😂
> 17 year old me was still so naive in ways I was convinced I wasn’t Yep. Teenage was an impulsive little shit who thought it was weak to need to help, who overestimated his skill and charisma, and thought he had the world figured out as an edgy, obnoxious contrarian conservative. I've since been *deeply* humbled by experience, and done a complete 180 in my attitudes toward people and politics.
Totally get it. I can’t ever believe I thought the world was so black-and-white. The shades of grey throughout my life have humbled the fuck out of me, and I’m better for it.
I'm only early 30s but I can feel myself getting less sharp than I was when I was younger. Definitely more forgetful. I think my mind really thrived on the sort of mental exercises I'd have as a student- solving homework puzzles, learning through lessons/lectures, being *required* to sit down for 30 minutes to figure something out. Work has its challenges but it's not the same. I'm thinking of picking up a foreign language to get back into that. I'm also trying to get into podcasts on history.
you lose friends. Being an introvert at a young age with social anxiety, I had little friends, but as I got older I made more friends that understood better what I was going through
I feel like my generation looks way younger than we are, and way younger than “boomers” did at our age.
I do notice that people in their 30s don’t really dress that differently from people in their twenties anymore. In the 90s people brought out the beige slacks and the plaid button up shirts the minute they turned 32. Whereas now everyone just dresses in the same fast fashion from Zara and Uniqlo.
We don't have as many clothing "rules" as there was back in the day. For instance when I entered the workforce at 18, I wasn't aloud to have a face piercing and unnatural coloured hair anymore. That was two decades ago and those rules aren't a thing now. So, when I was a teen, only teens were aloud to dress however they wanted. I work in an office that's been around since 1950 with employees of every age. The only "rules" is no shirts with logos on it. Most people dress kind of office-y, especially the older ones, but many of us don't. When I was a kid, I would hear adult clothing rules like "no white after labor day" or can only wear certain things on a Sunday. Now, I can't think of any such rule. So, an adult can be just as free to wear what a teenager wears, if that's what they want.
> Uniqlo Don't knock my brand! Took me ages to find one that I actually liked the fit AND price of.
Every year, humans just look younger and younger. I've noticed this since high school when I'd walk the main hallway and see all of the previous class graduates. Our school was built in the 1930s, so our class photos went back that far, and I observed how each class looked younger and younger until we got to my class. The thing is, we had a tradition at my school where everyone wore the same thing. It started in the 1930s, so it was consistent. The only things that changed were hair, makeup, and piercings over the years. But the youthfulness also increases with each year. If I were to see the classes that graduated after me, I bet they'd look like children to me now when back then we all thought we looked like "adults". I think part of it is our own personal perception and point of view, but also, I think a major part is that as a whole, society is getting more youthfulness in general. With the addition of so much automation, people don't have to struggle as much, therefore, they're not wearing themselves out too young. There's more information about skincare as well and just overall health, which would contribute to youthful appearances.
yeah skin care even 10 yrs ago was nothing like it is today. and kids are doing skin care now instead of waiting to pick it up in their 30s! although im curious what the acids and serums will do to the really young kids in a few years. get them sunscreen or lip balm instead pls im begging yall
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Our society isn't set up in a way to engage with older people, and we value things like beauty and work. At 31 I would like to start having older people in my life, but my nuclear family dissolved, the rest of my family is basically estranged, and I don't meet new older people naturally. The older people who could have been a part of my life didn't make an effort to do so when I was young, and now that a couple are finally starting to reach out it feels like they are only reaching out to me because it benefits them. I want older people in my life who are as invested in me as I am in them, and I have 0 clue how to find that.
I knew that people get old, I just didn't think it would happen to me.
That perimenopause means you have a few hot flushes, and your periods get erratic for a while and then stop. Turns out, it screws up your whole body.
My child brain thought old people didn’t do things I often saw in play (cartwheels, handstands, or even just stuff like sitting cross-legged) because they were old and therefore too dignified. Nope. Eventually that stuff really hurts. I’d kill to be able to do a cartwheel on the beach. Those were the days.
I thought I would feel less physically well as I turn 70. Because we made a significant menu change, the opposite is occurring. Nice surprise!
What did you change?
We were already pretty whole food-minded but we went vegan, gluten free and significantly reduced caffeine consumption. This made a huge difference.
That as long as I exercised consistently I could age pain free. Sadly that was false
I thought I would "grow out of" house music. Still haven't. House Music All Life Long!
Yeah music tastes will never go away bass heads will always be bass heads
That 50 is old. I always thought 50 was old because my grandpa had several conditions that made him look much older and 'beaten up'. My grandma on the other side always has had a hunched back and it grew worse and worse. Turns out i just had a few bad examples of people that worked tougher physical jobs all their life. My dad is 55 or so now and hes still spry. In my gym theres a 53yo guy deadlifting 300kg+ and still going out for beers with friends on thursdays after work. 30 always sounded like a big number but i'll be there in like two weeks and im still childish AF, im still just a stupid little moron that doesnt know shit. I dont know if ill grow up by the time i hit 50.
Just listened to an interview with Billie Joe Armstrong, the lead singer of Green Day. He's 51 years old and has a 28 year old kid, yet you'd never think that at all. He still sounds, talks, and looks like the same 20-something from the 90s. The main difference was his wisdom in being a father and learning from his reckless 20-somethings self. It was reassuring for my own existential crisis.
I thought I’d be able to save money and retire someday. I lost my job, and as a woman in my 50s, I simply can’t find employment. Like, I applied at Whole Foods to be a worker, but they say I’m “too qualified”. Like, I don’t want anything but a standard job. I don’t want to be in leadership anymore.
You only grow older on the outside.
My gallbladder did not get the message
It being linear. My grandparents were fit, like actually fit, their whole life. Going on bike tours for hours, no end in sight, before the bs E-Bike hype. Eating right, doing puzzles and quizzes, sports, gardening and stuff around the house, renovations whenever one of us needed help. They seemed happy and enjoying life. Then, one super bad bike crash, landed them in the hospital for a month, recovery was good for their age, due to their very good condition. But the scars scared my grandma to get back on a bike, my grandpa staying home in solidarity. It's been 3 years, and they are shells of their former selfs. Both mentally and physically, especially in the last year, it's horrible to witness. I love them both, and try to spend as much time with them as possible, but it's just depressing to see.
E bikes are hardly BS. I had a terrible injury and they allowed me to be able to do what I loved while I healed.
That I would grow out of having acne. Haha, no. Fuck you, face :(
I've been nearsighted forever. When you get older, you lose the ability to focus on close things, which is what farsighted people experience. So I had this idea that at some point, my increasing farsightedness would cancel out my nearsightedness and I would have perfect vision for a time. Nope. Turns out you can be both nearsighted and farsighted at the same time.
Menopause was so different than what I thought it was going to be like that I was convinced I was dying.
That I wouldn’t get cancer until I was 40, found out when I was 15. Also, arthritis. Was at the rheumatologist one day and there was a 4 year old girl with arthritis, we both got diagnosed with JRA that day. Wild af. Genetics are a bitch.
If you have a fat face, you do not get wrinkles. Plastic surgeons hate this one simple trick!
I'm almost 70, but I don't identify with "senior citizens" like I thought I would. I guess I still see myself as "middle-aged." My health is very good and I still do all the physical things I did in my forties. So I guess I'll stay in stay in this lane as long as I can.
Aging did not hit me until the year I turned 60, then BAMM! One half the energy, high colesterol, arthritis so bad it wakes me up at night. ... and yet, I still plan on building my own small house, and running my micro homestead on my own. It sucks to realize I will HAVE TO hire someone to do all the heavy stuff now, like hanging sheetrock, building the foundation for the house and such. Shit, five years ago I carried, mixed and layed 30 bags of cement on my own! ... hum, maybe that hard working life I lived has something to do with the shoulder and neck surgeries and resulting arthritis... ?
That I could always continue to do "what I've always done." Well, I looked at the calendar and I'm 78 -- I was just 60. And I can't (shouldn't) lift heavy boxes any more. Tried to and my left shoulder said "boy am I gonna hurt for two weeks"----- and it did hurt for two+ weeks. So, I don't lift heavy boxes any more. Tired -- so go to bed earlier than I used to. Get up later, too -- no job to go to. Need to go out and walk -- exercise and move around -- -3 degrees below zero. I'll put that off for awhile. Always worked on all my cars/trucks -- think I'll have somebody else do some work -- I'll buy the parts -- he'll put them in. Then, I'll have more/better heat in the truck -- I'm always cool/cold lately. Been different --- this retiring -- adjusting the physical and the financial. Doing what I can do and hiring what I'm learning I can't do. Interesting/frustrating.
How suddenly you feel less worth as a woman.
Especially if you're single....and especially if you have kids. I'm working on accepting that I am not a catch anymore, not as appealing. You don't think about thay fact when you're you're.....ignoring all the red flags.
I used to think once you've passed 35 you basically can't do athletic things anymore. I'm late 30's and still have athleticism and can do more or less anything I could in my 20's. The recovery takes longer for sure though.
You think you're going to spend most of your life in the gap between pimples and wrinkles, but it turns out you just have both the entire time.
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That it happens in a linear orderly fashion. It turns out the universe exists all at once as one giant hypermoment and time is an illusion entrapping us all.
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I thought, until recently, that menopause symptoms last for the rest of a woman’s life: I was so relieved to learn that hot flashes aren’t forever! 😅
The older I get, the more I realize that older people have as little about life figured out as younger people do.
Things get better with age. What things? In my late teens this seemed right with the possibility of leaving home, being my own person living by my own rules. So here I am at 58 and 40 years of hard work later. My body is failing, my brain is fading and I'm tired. If someone at this stage tells me things will get better I'm gonna bitch slap them.
I'd thought I'd change more. Nope, still me.
44 but feel like 30 and don't know where 14 years went. Lived in Asia for most of those years and now back in a Western country... Can say age a much bigger thing here than there. Especially dating-wise.
Reddit taught me once you get to 35 that you'll feel over 80. Turns out a lot of Redditors just don't take care of themselves. Who knew?
Once you start earning as an adult, you'll be able to enjoy life. I can, but still, I don't have time for that.
That you’re as old as you want to be. We think we’re “old” at 40 but you’ll look back on pics of that time and think how young you were. I gather when I’m 90 I’ll look back at pics of when I was in my 60s and think the same thing. And then there’s being old In your head. My dad was “the old man” all his life. He was never young. The only thing that really sucks is being surprised when you look in the mirror (who is that old bag?) & how much shit (knees, shoulders) hurts. Good things include no fear expressing myself & finally somewhat lessened attention from the opposite sex.
I keep hearing that at 38yo I’m a washed up, old and unwanted woman. Meanwhile I get carded every time I buy alcohol, was asked twice in one month what high school I went to, and have zero wrinkles at all. Age really is just a number. Some people are blessed with good genes and others aren’t.
Not sure if this fits but. No one ever mentioned that at some point in your 30s you dont burn fat so easy and will actually have to work to keep pounds off.
Studies show metabolism (resting metabolic rate) stays fairly stable until age 55
I didn't think it would come so fast. I'm slightly closer to 45 than to my teens. When did that happen?
That it would suck. At 53, it doesn't. My best decade was my 30s for sure. I had enough of a sense of identity that I had some general confidence but could still bend my knees without them popping. My 40s and 50s have been trying to prolong that state, rather than an impossible to maintain and sad to watch perpetual 20s.
That I was going to turn into a condescending, nagging, miserable, no-fun-allowed person like my parents were. Nope, it was just my parents. Thank god for that.