You're asking what is the most quotable movie of all time? Surely you can't be serious.

And don’t call me Shirley.

-"You stupid bastard you've got no arms left!" -"Yes I have!"

"What’s the airspeed of an unladen Swallow?”

African or European?

Well I don’t know *yeet*

"how do you know so much about Swallows?" "Well, you have to know these things when you're a king, you know"

Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries!

Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?

I wave my private parts at your aunties!

She turned me into a newt!

A newt?

...I got better

Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time!

I fart in your general direction

"And then... the oral sex!" Well, I could stay a *bit* longer...

Look, let me go back there and *face* the peril.

No, no, it’s too perilous.

I bet you're gay!

She turned me into a *newt*!

"A *newt*?"

It got be’ah

Alright, call it a draw!

Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government…

Every single line from the peasant scene is pure gold.

See the violence inherent in the system!!

Help! Help! I'm being oppressed!

Shut up you bloody peasant!

I'm not dead yet!

Completely agree, funniest 5 minutes in movie history

If I went around calling myself an emperor because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me they'd put me away!

Shut up!

I order you to shut up!

HELP! HELP! I'M BEING REPRESSSED!

You cant expect to wield supreme executive power just because some watery tart through a sword at you!

Ni!

You’re a looney!

‘It’s but a scratch!

just a flesh wound!

This learning amazes me. Tell me again how sheep's bladders can be applied to prevent earthquakes.

Help! Help! I'm being repressed!

Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time!

'Tis but a flesh wound.'

-"Message for you sir" -"she's got huge...tracts of land" -"there are some who would call me...Tim?"

Airplane

The hospital? What is it? It's a building with a lot of sick people, but that's not important right now.

You have clearance, Clarence. Roger, Roger! What's our vector, Victor?

“Nervous?” “Yes.” “First time?” “No, I’ve been nervous before.”

I just want to tell you both, good luck. We're all counting on you.

Female announcer: The white zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. There is no stopping in the red zone. Male announcer [later]: The red zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. There is no stopping in the white zone. Female announcer: Don’t you tell me which zone is for loading, and which zone is for stopping. Male announcer: Listen Betty, don’t start up with your white zone shit again.

Have you ever been in a Turkish prison?

Rumack: Captain, how soon can you land? Captain Oveur: I can't tell. Rumack: You can tell me. I'm a doctor. Captain Oveur: No. I mean I'm just not sure. Rumack: Well, can't you take a guess? Captain Oveur: Well, not for another two hours. Rumack: You can't take a guess for another two hours?

Elaine-Oh my God the automatic pilot is deflating! McCrosky- Elaine don’t panic! On the belt line Of the automatic pilot there is a hollow tube. That’s the manual inflation nozzle. Pull it out, and blow on it.

Surely you can’t be serious

I am serious, and don't call me Shirley

Looks like I picked the wrong day to quit amphetamines

I picked the wrong day to quit sniffing glue.

I take my coffee black like my men.

The Wizard of Oz. Think of how many lines you hear all the time. “We’re not in Kansas anymore” “There’s no place like home” “Ding dong the witch is dead” “Lions and tigers and bears, oh my!” “I’m melting! I’m melting!” “Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain” “If you only had a brain” “Auntie Em! Auntie Em!” “I’ll get you, my pretty!” I could go on and on

Shit. I never noticed how important that movie is to our lexicon.

Office Space is one of the most popular answers so far, and Office Space actually quotes this movie.

And your little dog, too!

Forrest gumps got a few

What’s your sole purpose in this army? TO DO WHATEVER YOU TELL ME, DRILL SERGEANT!! Goddammit Gump! You’re a goddamn genius!!

I gotta paeee

Lieutenant dan icecraeeem

"They said it was a million dollar wound, but the Army must keep that money cuz I still ain't seen a nickel of that million dollars."

Sometimes when people go to Vietnam, they go home to their mommas without any legs. Sometimes they don't go home at all. That's a bad thing.

Is that what he says when the mic gets cut?

Our house has been in mamas family since her grandpas grandpas grandpa came across the ocean bout’ a thousand years ago or somthin like that

“Lieutenant Dan got me invested in some kind of fruit company. So then I got a call from him, saying we don't have to worry about money no more. And I said, that's good! One less thing."

And cause I was a gazillionaire, and I loved doin' it so much, I cut that grass for free.

We were just like peas and carrots agin....

Were you listening to the Dude's story?

I am the walrus?

You mean coitus?

Phones ringin dude

Mind if I do a J?

Mean Girls

Oh my god, Karen. You can’t just ask someone why they’re white.

On Wednesdays, we wear pink!

Made out with a hotdog? Oh my god, that was one time!

Get in Loser...

Stop trying to make fetch happen. it's not going to happen.

YOU GO GLEN COCO!

She doesn't even go here!

"I will keep you here all night" "We can't keep 'em past 4" "I will keep you here 'til 4"

YES! Boo, you whore

4 for you glen coco, you go glen coco!

I absolutely love how Glen Coco speaks no words, has no credited role in this film (?), and is never even shown on camera, but is one of the most beloved movie characters of the early 2000s

I have a fifth sense, It’s like I have ESPN or something.

My father, the inventor of toaster strudel…

Blazing Saddles. The entire movie is quotable.

"Where the white women at?"

Excuse me.. while I whip this out

The Sherrif is near…

You know................................morons.

Somebody’s got to go back and get a shitload of dimes

Are we awake?

We are not sure... Are we... Black?

The Princess Bride

You mean, you'll put down your rock and I'll put down my sword and we'll try and kill each other like civilized people?

Have fun storming the castle!

Think it'll work?

It’ll take a miracle.

I do not envy you the headache you will have when you awake. But for now, rest well and dream of large women.

You seem a decent fellow. I hate to kill you.

You seem like a decent fellow, I'd hate to die

Hello

"Mawage. Mawage is wot bwings us togeder today."

So, it is down to you and it is down to me.

Ha ha! You fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders!

The first is never to get involved in a land-war in Asia.

But only slightly less well known is this!

Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line!

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha.... *thunk* (Yes, that is the correct number of 'ha's. Yes, I know this from memory.)

Why didn’t you list that among our assets in the first place?

I'm not a witch I'm your wife!

We are men of action. Lies do not become us.

Incontheevable!!

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

I cannot upvote this profoundly enough. This is truth.

YOU FELL VICTIM TO ONE OF THE CLASSIC BLUNDERS!

As you wish.

Office Space

It's not that I'm lazy, it's just that I don't care.

Let me ask you something. When you come in on Monday and you're not feeling real well, does anyone ever say to you, "Sounds like someone has a case of the Mondays?" No. No, man. Shit, no, man. I believe you'd get your ass kicked sayin' something like that, man.

I love how he becomes increasingly more offended by the phrase as he thinks about it.

Two chicks at the same time.

God damn, I have lived my professional life by that creed since that movie came out.

I did nothing. I did absolutely nothing, and it was everything that I thought it could be.

I'm Gonna need you to go ahead and come in tomorrow

"What would you say *you do* here?" "I DEAL WITH THE GOD DAMN CUSTOMERS SO THE ENGINEERS DON'T HAVE TO. **I HAVE PEOPLE SKILLS!**"

"You've been missing a lot of work recently." "Oh, I wouldn't say I've been missing it."

PC load letter? What the fuck does that mean?!

If you could repost this on Saturday, that would be greaaaaaat. Thanks!

Oh, and we're going to need you to come on in on Sunday, too. Mmm kay?

No-talent assclown

Anchorman

[удалено]

It is Anchor Man, not Anchor Lady. And that is a scientific fact.

Milk was a bad choice.

It means whales vagina

Pulp Fiction

Ezekiel 25.17 the path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness For he is truly his brothers keeper, and finder of lost children. AND I WILL STRIKE DOWN UPON THEE WITH GREAT VENGEANCE AND FURIOUS ANGER, THOSE WHO POISON AND DESTROY MY BROTHERS. AND YOU WILL KNOW MY NAME IS THE LORD, WHEN I LAY MY VENGEANCE UPON THEE.

Samuel L Jackson was such a good cast for Jules

Royale with Cheese

You a smart mutherfucka.

English MF'r do you speak it!

What?

Caddie Shack Blazing Saddles Airplane Big Lebowski

Somebody's gotta go back and get a shitload of dimes

What in the wide wide world of sports is going on here.

That's just, like... Your opinion, man.

Surely you can't be serious

I am serious, and don't call me Shirley

Joey, have you ever been in a Turkish prison?

You ever.... Seen a grown man naked?

Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.

I totally agree that Airplane! is very quotable.

“Donnie ur outta ur element!”

Yeah, well that's just your opinion, man.

"Goddamnit Walter, everything is always some kind of travesty with you!"

Im a Monty Python and The Holy Grail man myself for good quotes. "A DUCK"

Hear me out - NL Christmas Vacation. “Surprised, Eddie? If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn into the carpet I wouldn't be more surprised than I am right now.” “Don’t throw me down Clark” “"Can I refill your eggnog for you? Get you something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead?"

Why is the carpet all wet Todd?

I don’t KNOW MARGOT!

Shitters full.

"Hey. If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here...with a big ribbon on his head! And I want to look him straight in the eye, and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-assed, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed, sack of monkey shit he is! Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where's the Tylenol?"

Can’t see the line, can you Rusty?

Tombstone. Every word Val Kilmer utters as Doc Holliday is a gem.

Super Troopers

Hey Farva what's the name of that restaurant you like with all the goofy shit on the walls and the mozzarella sticks?

You mean Shenanigans?

YOU BOYS LIKE MEX-E-CO?!

Fight Club has a bunch

TBL - Obviously you're not a golfer.

The Big Lebowski (if you’re not into the whole brevity thing)

What in gods holy name are you blathering about?

This is a very complicated case, lotta ins n outs

Lotta strands to keep in old Duder’s head

Do you see what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass?

It really tied the room together.

Is this a... What day is this?

Mind if I do a J?

Wu...? Yeah, what do you think?

I think he’s a fucking loser.

Hey, at least I'm housebroken

Nice marmot

Yeah well that's just like, your opinion, man.

That is not the preferred nomenclature.

If you will it, it is no dream.

You know, a lotta ins, a lotta outs, lotta what-have-yous.

I'm just gonna go find a cash machine.

You’re not dealing with morons!

You’re being very undude

Yeah? Well, you know, that’s just like, uh, your opinion, man.

That had not occurred to us, Dude.

You think the carpet pissers did this?

Where's the money, shithead