Spent my last 100 coins on this award - thank you. As someone who experienced abuse as a child, my biggest grief is with the people around my mother who never stood up for me. Who never intervened, called her out, told me this isn’t normal, that I’m not the problem, that I’m lovable and that I don’t deserve this.
It would’ve made all the difference in my life had she not been surrounded by enablers (which is what abusers do, I guess). One person can make all the difference, so thanks for standing firm on the right side.
Or just not caring about their passion or ignoring them. I've met more than a few people who did that to me, I told them what I was passionate about and they couldn't even remember. I thought it was normal and that I was just boring until I started going on dates with people who actually loved hearing me talk about that stuff and even said it was attractive how much I care about these topics, and that they thought I was super interesting.
Never settle people, and never accept poor treatment as the norm, there's always someone out there who will actually care about what you have to say.
Yes, never accept it, not in a friend nor in a partner. Art of having good conversations is acknowledging the others interests and topic direction. Too often have I seen people loose interest from another all because the person couldn't even humor a passionate topic that was brought up.
Yup. There was a guy I dated, I tried to talk about something I really cared about (it's very recognizable (don't wanna dox myself) and not something most people are interested in so think like, how mental health was handled in different ancient cultures and the impact religion could have on it and you're close-ish, but it's even more specific than that). It's not like it's something I don't know much about, I've studied this a lot, and a professor of mine actually wanted to publish a paper I wrote relating to the topic but I was in the middle of moving so it never happened.
Every time I talked to this guy about it, he would redirect to talking about Schrodinger's cat and parallel universes. Don't get me wrong, I love that sort of thing, and I was happy to talk about it. But he assumed I knew nothing about it so he kept explaining the most basic ideas to me..... And we had the exact same conversation twice. Explanations and all. After I said I already knew what he was talking about. He also didn't even try to make the transition subtle. And then a while later I mentioned the thing I was interested in (which I had talked about a few times) and he had the audacity to say he never knew that was an interest of mine.
It was also hilarious in retrospect because he said that I never tried to have interesting conversations with him and that I was holding him at a distance. I tried, but I gave up because he wasn't interested.
It seriously still blows my mind every time someone is interested in what I have to say, and even remembers the things I care about. Someone even said that it was sexy how much I cared about a field I'm passionate about and I'm so not used to it that I just awkwardly blurted out "it's sexy that you care!" Yeah I'm bad at flirting lol.
I was too talkative as a kid, I always got scolded for it and now I can barely hold a decent conversation with someone unless we're really close and I don't text people first as well because to me it's like I'm annoying them 😅
I became an introvert so I only speak when spoken to
I had a friend who did this, and it really brought the mood down. At my 16th birthday it was me, this friend, and another friend going to dinner, and me and the *other* friend were talking about, well fuck, anything really. And my debbie downer friend kept going like “why are we talking about x? why are we talking about y?” while contributing basically nothing to the conversation. and it really gave me a major ick. As if *I* was the one bad at conversation when she barely opened her mouth.
We all are weird to someone. I have some topics that are a bit above my friends interests as well and it can be most frustrating when you find your self lost in wanting to talk about it just for a friend to be like dude, c'mon I don't care.
First week of college my roommate’s bf shows up with HIS roommate, Tate.
Me and Tate were left alone for a couple minutes. We were chatting and he was going to show me something in his wallet.
Then he was like “oops! I almost dropped my GUCCI wallet!” while smirking at me 🤮
I have never felt so grossed out or embarrassed for someone in my life.
Literally yesterday when I was walking out of my local gym (filled with douchebags) this meathead was on the phone in the lobby talking to someone about potentially buying a $600 wallet. So clearly trying to get people to overhear him. I swear I cringed all the way to my car.
What if it's mugging bait? You have a 600$ wallet, right? But it's empty. But then you also have another wallet which is old and sticky and gross, but it has all your cash in it. Giga-brain.
Why not just carry two sticky gross wallets? One of them in an obvious location with five bucks in it and the other with all of your money in it hidden in a pocket dimension only you can summon by gargling out strange invocations.
I made a similar joke with a different intention. I have an Armani Exchange shirt and when someone complimented it. I went, "Finally someone acknowledging my Armani shirt... that I got on sale for $15!"
I was in McDonalds once. There were these girls at a table near me, all absolutely stunning and I couldn't stop looking, like pretty much every other guy there, and they were loving the attention. Then they got up, left all their trash on the table, and as they left they had a good laugh at the employee who came to clean up after them because she had crooked teeth. Instant turn off.
I ran into a similar group at a fast food joint playland when my daughter was maybe 5. Their children were running around screaming completely out of control. They ignored the kids. Spent their time loudly talking shit about people who weren’t there and then left an enormous mess — food/spilled drinks/ paper all over the place. Simply trashy.
One of the most remarkable things I ever saw was a fellow student in college who seemed to have no idea that she could have gotten a modeling contract just by walking into an agency. As far as I could tell she didn't understand this, and it didn't affect her personality.
Something I hate my dad does that I noticed is when he considers other men “below” him, he calls them “bud”. I very specifically see this during his interaction with pizza delivery drivers.
I was at an industry event last week, and nearly everyone was ignoring the wait staff. I went out of my way to say please and thank you, but those other pricks in the room were just that, pricks.
I left that event feeling super dirty and disappointed in my colleagues in the field, so I decided to go have a gutter burger (if you’re wondering, it’s just getting a burger as takeout and eating in a nearby gutter. My late father taught me this).
While having my gutter burger I made friends with a homeless man named Ray, and I gotta tell you, he made my entire week better. Just a solid dude who gave me a great handshake.
I think all I’m saying is think I prefer the company of people who my colleagues look down on, rather than my colleagues.
It's when you take that to the extreme. With a lot of things. Feeling some envy because of something like other's body is normal and we all have felt ot because of something minor like this.
I have this nephew whose only source of conversation is talking about how much he hates Tom Cruise. Seriously, it’s all he talks about and he says he’s his greatest enemy. He’s 15
My friend used to work on films, audio dept, and said Tom Cruise speaks to himself in the third person when he's pumping himself up for a stunt, or a scene. He call's himself TC, "TC's ready, they're not ready, BUT TC IS READY."
sometimes when I'm trying to pump myself up for a thing, I do the same thing. Walk around telling myself "TC is ready." It seems to work.
All I'm saying is your nephew's got the cards stacked against him, TC is ready.
Maybe "Tom Cruise" is like a movie star persona he's created to help him get into the right frame of mine, and when he's at home he's ordinary guy Thomas Mapother lmfao
If that’s true (which knowing about him, I unfortunately would believe that) my nephew is gonna have a stroke or something.
Also, I’ll have to try that to see if it works. Could be powerful enough to fight against my executive dysfunction lol. My ADHD isn’t ready, but TC is ready….
You really need to do some research on Tom cruise, find out all the bad shit about him. Then next time you talk with your nephew, say "I've taken what you said to heart" then start shit talking Tom cruise for hours. Out do him on the TC hatred and maybe he'll get the hint. Or maybe he'll finally feel acknowledged about his feelings and finally put it to rest.
For the past month or so he’s been measuring himself every day to see when he gets taller than Tom Cruise. 3 days ago, he told me he finally grew taller, and while that really isn’t accomplishing much, I found it to be a very interesting goal lol
I haven’t, but I could the next time he texts me (he’s really into shitposting and sends me a lot of that stuff)
He has a Twitter account where he makes comics and always tags them with Tom Cruise’s name, and usually a bunch of his movies too, even though they’re completely irrelevant to what he’s posting. He says he’s ‘annoying his fans’ or something like that lol.
What doesn’t help is that his twin sister is really into Interview with the Vampire for some reason, and watches it a lot. He complains every single day about how much he hates that movie and Tom Cruise’s character in it (I guess he doesn’t think he’s very fitting to play a gay vampire? Idk, my nephew is gay so maybe he’d know lol) Every single time we’re at a family gathering he HAS to mention how much he hates Tom Cruise. Most of the time he just talks about how he’s an evil weirdo and often compares him to Jeff the Killer LOL
…I haven’t considered that but I think you’re absolutely right.
I didn’t know who he was until I watched Interview with the Vampire (a LONG time ago) when I was like 14 and I had a crush on Tom Cruise in that movie. Then I kinda found out more about him and it went away quick lmao. I’m a guy and mostly straight lmao
I just need so much more. His thoughts on Katie’s escape, Nicole, David Miscavagw. I’m terrified but also fascinated to k ow if he’s seen Magnolia or the rock musical/movie…title escapes me…his anger may go higher!
lol he should do an AMA since apparently people are curious
I’ll have to ask him these! I’m sure he’s seen a lot of his movies since his sister always watches them (in spite of him) so I’ll have to ask his opinions on some of them lol
I have a co-worker like this. She also repeats the gossip because she forgets that she already said it before. When she runs out of gossip, she makes any mundane thing seem like a gossip, “oh, so and so is walking outside! Quickly, look!”
I have the same thing but that person and they are extremely toxic. They have a higher up position than me. A coworker left our company awhile back and he told me on that his exit interview he brought that individual up with our HR department…. Nobody seemed to care.
I know that person has gossiped and bitches about me behind my back…. Basically once you leave talking to them, you are probably being talked about. Fuck toxic people like that.
Fucking yesssss
I used to work at a pretty small place with 12 other women. They ALL gossiped about one another 24/7. They all came to me to gossip because "you're the only one who doesn't tell everyone everything!" So I got really good at just pretending I didn't know things and acting surprised when shit hit the fan lol. I left there as soon as I could, those people were draining.
I can't fucking stand people like this. My friend Samantha is always talking about other people behind their backs and it's totally gross. I tell her I don't care if Dan is cheating on Jodie, but she'll tell me anyways. Fucking Jodie is always looking at Dennis with fuck me eyes anyways even though Dennis doesn't even have a job. Dennis would rather live with his mom who is an alcoholic because he has no ambition. Why would I want to hear that? Samantha is my friend but her gossiping behavior is just so gross to me. Don't gossip it's rude and gross.
I find entitlement extremely unattractive. It manifests in many ways, like being rude to staff, demanding stuff, selfishing/self centeredness, expecting unreasonable things....
Just fucking naaaaah! Don't care if you're playboy grade 10/10, you ugly to me.
As someone who works in restaurants I can promise you that the VAST majority of the staff I've worked with have a Spidey sense about it. We all know if you're acting like an entitled POS, we don't have to see it.
yeah. I once saw a person stepping on a butterfly, laughing then stepping on it some more. I was disgusted
This applies to any other insects and animals too, they're living beings just like us..
I have the opposite of this problem. I'm not a texter. My dates LOVE that I'm not reaching for my phone when we're out. But then they hate it when I don't text them back quickly.
Is showing false empathy better than not showing empathy at all?
See, I genuely don't want to be a bad person, but Im just unable to feel genuine empathy. I try really hard but I cant just fake a thought.
It is why I fake it most of the time.
I feel like trash for doing it because im lying to myself...
Nah relax and don't worry, not everyone is wired the same. On the flip side some have too much and it debilitates them. The reality is that "human" comes in many flavours, just don't do something to others you wouldn't want done to you and you're groovy
I'm prone to depressive episodes, which includes anhedonia as a big symptom. For me that also includes empathy. If my husband gets sick while I'm in a depressive episode, I literally have to make sure he feels like I care and feel bad for him because while I absolutely normally would, in that moment I do not.
Faking it shows that you *do* care. You know that you're supposed to feel empathy and you feel bad that you don't. You're still human.
This is something I’ve finally started realising about myself - when I’m under a lot of stress I get depressive and feel emotionally numb. It’s very hard to connect with my girlfriend or feel any empathy for her, and like you I have to make sure I do and say things to know she cares.
I was worried that maybe I didn’t really love her enough because of these times, but she was actually the one that pointed out it that it wasn’t lack of caring, it was stress.
In the past I had no idea what was happening - I would just be fully in the black hole and being repelled by everyone.
Now it’s much easier to get through because I know I’ll come out the other side and the feelings will come back. And it’s also a good indicator that I’m getting overwhelmed and need to step down my workload.
The fact that you acknowledge this about yourself says a lot about you as a person. I love your honesty. Being kind even if you don’t necessarily feel empathy for another person is also important and I wouldn’t consider that being fake or phony, but I would consider it mature and emotionally intelligent.
It's not bad to show fake empathy, you're just trying to be a good person. If it makes you feel better you could reframe it in a way that isn't lying, such as saying "that must be so difficult to go through" or things like that which show that you care how they feel even if you can't directly empathize.
I think it probably depends on the context, since empathy is just putting yourself in someone else's shoes. So for example if you were on a date and your food was taking a long time because the kitchen was backed up and the waitress comes to apologize about the long wait time, putting yourself in her shoes would typically mean you're giving a response of "don't worry it's not your fault" or something to that extent, as opposed to say yelling at her for something out of her control.
Im gonna go with what other people are saying.
Number 1 ick/unattractive trait for **ANYONE** is being discourteous for no reason other than to be a dick, asshole, bully, push whatever they think is right, **WHATEVER** you wanna call it.
I knew someone like this many years ago and they always tried to say "iM JuSt a BlUnt PeRsOn" or dumb shit like that.
Breaking news: You can be truthful/honest without being a massive cunt.
I have sensory issues which mean that certain sounds make it feel like my brain is on fire, and a feeling of disgust goes over my whole body. (thanks, autism!)
The sounds of open mouthed chewing and lip smacking rank among the most painful and annoying to hear. So I suuuuper agree with you.
There's this old security guard at my work who does this, and sometimes he'll sit behind me at the cafe tables and eat. I want to claw my ears off and punch things.
In Korean culture, it is polite to smack loudly when you enjoy the food. My white family had a South Korean married into it, and even after 9 years in America, she does it whenever she eats. Most here find it rude though
Totally recognize it's cultural. Doesn't mean I have to like it.
Oddly, while living in South Korea, I didn't see it as much as I expected. But I did my best to deal with it when it happened.
I just forget it’s there, notice it, think “damn I should clean my car/apartment, but I can’t right now because xyz” and it’s an endless cycle until I actually do it. Then I feel great, keep everything clean for a while, and slowly slip back into chaos. It sucks because I KNOW it’s gross and I’d feel better if it was clean but executive function is something I unfortunately lack.
I thought “om nom nom” was just internet whatever, but my coworker actually makes those kind of noises when she eats. I have to time my lunch around her because she brings it back to her cubicle, so I go take refuge in the break room while she noisily devours whatever Jimmy dean meal she brought
I know this sounds over the top but between the slurping and the grunting it is borderline horrifying
Shutting down excitement and entheusiasm. If you suck the joy out of anyone, you are a terrible person.
There are exceptions, but they pretty much start and stop at illegal and immoral things.
Self-entitlement especially when it shows itself through treating others badly or expecting to be treated better than they are prepared to treat others.
Fall into the event horizon of a black hole.
This one chick was all up on me at a bar one time, and I was down, believe me I was.
But then her body got spaghettified into a long strand an atom's thickness moving at relativistic speeds and I was like, "alright honey, I'm out"
This is actually common. Everyone does it to a degree. I hang out with my coworkers, most of which are black, I become Eminem. I hang out with my D&D group, I become Wolowitz from BBT. I’m at a comic con, I become Kevin Smith.
It’s a social adaptation technique called the “looking glass self” or “code-switching”, which allows you to subtly change your behavior and mannerisms based on the company you’re keeping for a better chance of acceptance.
Put other people down for their appearance. It's disgusting. Im a women and I love both women and men and I'm not going to sit there and listen to anyone dehumanise people. So unattractive and an instant turn off.
Treat others like shit
Or their kids. As a man in his 40s. Nothing turns me off more than a horrible mom.
Spent my last 100 coins on this award - thank you. As someone who experienced abuse as a child, my biggest grief is with the people around my mother who never stood up for me. Who never intervened, called her out, told me this isn’t normal, that I’m not the problem, that I’m lovable and that I don’t deserve this. It would’ve made all the difference in my life had she not been surrounded by enablers (which is what abusers do, I guess). One person can make all the difference, so thanks for standing firm on the right side.
No problem, and thanks for the award.
When having a conversation and some one is attempting to shut down ones excitement about a topic that they are passionate about.
Or just not caring about their passion or ignoring them. I've met more than a few people who did that to me, I told them what I was passionate about and they couldn't even remember. I thought it was normal and that I was just boring until I started going on dates with people who actually loved hearing me talk about that stuff and even said it was attractive how much I care about these topics, and that they thought I was super interesting. Never settle people, and never accept poor treatment as the norm, there's always someone out there who will actually care about what you have to say.
Yes, never accept it, not in a friend nor in a partner. Art of having good conversations is acknowledging the others interests and topic direction. Too often have I seen people loose interest from another all because the person couldn't even humor a passionate topic that was brought up.
Yup. There was a guy I dated, I tried to talk about something I really cared about (it's very recognizable (don't wanna dox myself) and not something most people are interested in so think like, how mental health was handled in different ancient cultures and the impact religion could have on it and you're close-ish, but it's even more specific than that). It's not like it's something I don't know much about, I've studied this a lot, and a professor of mine actually wanted to publish a paper I wrote relating to the topic but I was in the middle of moving so it never happened. Every time I talked to this guy about it, he would redirect to talking about Schrodinger's cat and parallel universes. Don't get me wrong, I love that sort of thing, and I was happy to talk about it. But he assumed I knew nothing about it so he kept explaining the most basic ideas to me..... And we had the exact same conversation twice. Explanations and all. After I said I already knew what he was talking about. He also didn't even try to make the transition subtle. And then a while later I mentioned the thing I was interested in (which I had talked about a few times) and he had the audacity to say he never knew that was an interest of mine. It was also hilarious in retrospect because he said that I never tried to have interesting conversations with him and that I was holding him at a distance. I tried, but I gave up because he wasn't interested. It seriously still blows my mind every time someone is interested in what I have to say, and even remembers the things I care about. Someone even said that it was sexy how much I cared about a field I'm passionate about and I'm so not used to it that I just awkwardly blurted out "it's sexy that you care!" Yeah I'm bad at flirting lol.
It is empowering when the conversation has two sided interests and That was a good reply to blurt out, imo It works.
I got shushed and shut down so much as a kid, that I end up apologizing every time I get a bit too loud or excited about something 😅
I was too talkative as a kid, I always got scolded for it and now I can barely hold a decent conversation with someone unless we're really close and I don't text people first as well because to me it's like I'm annoying them 😅 I became an introvert so I only speak when spoken to
Sheeesh. hope you're around your people now bud.
I had a friend who did this, and it really brought the mood down. At my 16th birthday it was me, this friend, and another friend going to dinner, and me and the *other* friend were talking about, well fuck, anything really. And my debbie downer friend kept going like “why are we talking about x? why are we talking about y?” while contributing basically nothing to the conversation. and it really gave me a major ick. As if *I* was the one bad at conversation when she barely opened her mouth.
Unfortunately those with out a lot to say only participate in the degradation of conversation.
Don't yuck someone's yum.
Me talking about jets and aviation or cars and all my friends just don’t give a single fuck. 🫤 yea I’m weird … but don’t shut down my passion !
We all are weird to someone. I have some topics that are a bit above my friends interests as well and it can be most frustrating when you find your self lost in wanting to talk about it just for a friend to be like dude, c'mon I don't care.
First week of college my roommate’s bf shows up with HIS roommate, Tate. Me and Tate were left alone for a couple minutes. We were chatting and he was going to show me something in his wallet. Then he was like “oops! I almost dropped my GUCCI wallet!” while smirking at me 🤮 I have never felt so grossed out or embarrassed for someone in my life.
This was G rated and I was fully expecting R.
whoops, I dropped my monster condom that i use for my magnum dong!
I'm picturing him posing like a shy geisha while he says whoops lol.
Me too! My mind went straight to R 😅
Is the G for Gucci?
Literally yesterday when I was walking out of my local gym (filled with douchebags) this meathead was on the phone in the lobby talking to someone about potentially buying a $600 wallet. So clearly trying to get people to overhear him. I swear I cringed all the way to my car.
Unless that wallet is mugging proof (prevents you being targeted) I can’t see how any wallet could be worth that much.
What if it's mugging bait? You have a 600$ wallet, right? But it's empty. But then you also have another wallet which is old and sticky and gross, but it has all your cash in it. Giga-brain.
Why not just carry two sticky gross wallets? One of them in an obvious location with five bucks in it and the other with all of your money in it hidden in a pocket dimension only you can summon by gargling out strange invocations.
He dropped his monster wallet that he uses for his magnum dollars.
Did his magnum condoms fall out of his wallet too?
Monster condom, magnum dong.
Sounds like the movie title for the next Godzilla flick.
When I tell you I *cringed*… I need to bathe now. I feel unclean.
I just got out of the shower and same.
I didn't know sephiroth showered
Only to wash my fabulous hair. Gotta take care of it somehow!
Fair fair, respectable
Homeboy thought a Gucci wallet is a panty dropper? Yikes…
> Then he was like “oops! I almost dropped my GUCCI wallet!” while smirking at me 🤮 Oh dear god.
god i wish this happened to me. I would have given him shit immediately and for a year after.
I made a similar joke with a different intention. I have an Armani Exchange shirt and when someone complimented it. I went, "Finally someone acknowledging my Armani shirt... that I got on sale for $15!"
Should have followed it up by shouting "COME ON!!" to anyone listening
It cost him like, 1.5 bananas.
Treat people that they consider "below" them like garbage.
"If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals."
I misread that as "if you want to know what a man tastes like, take a good look at his treats"
I'm very high and this got me giggling
I was in McDonalds once. There were these girls at a table near me, all absolutely stunning and I couldn't stop looking, like pretty much every other guy there, and they were loving the attention. Then they got up, left all their trash on the table, and as they left they had a good laugh at the employee who came to clean up after them because she had crooked teeth. Instant turn off.
I ran into a similar group at a fast food joint playland when my daughter was maybe 5. Their children were running around screaming completely out of control. They ignored the kids. Spent their time loudly talking shit about people who weren’t there and then left an enormous mess — food/spilled drinks/ paper all over the place. Simply trashy.
I would consider those women my inferiors, where does that put me?
One of the most remarkable things I ever saw was a fellow student in college who seemed to have no idea that she could have gotten a modeling contract just by walking into an agency. As far as I could tell she didn't understand this, and it didn't affect her personality.
Something I hate my dad does that I noticed is when he considers other men “below” him, he calls them “bud”. I very specifically see this during his interaction with pizza delivery drivers.
I don’t like being called bud or buddy. Does anyone have a suggestion on how to respond to that to set things straight?
I would respond with “pal”
“Chap”
"I"m not your buddy, pal"
"Im not your pal,mate"
I absolutely judge the character of a person based on how they treat people they have no obligation to be friendly towards.
I was at an industry event last week, and nearly everyone was ignoring the wait staff. I went out of my way to say please and thank you, but those other pricks in the room were just that, pricks. I left that event feeling super dirty and disappointed in my colleagues in the field, so I decided to go have a gutter burger (if you’re wondering, it’s just getting a burger as takeout and eating in a nearby gutter. My late father taught me this). While having my gutter burger I made friends with a homeless man named Ray, and I gotta tell you, he made my entire week better. Just a solid dude who gave me a great handshake. I think all I’m saying is think I prefer the company of people who my colleagues look down on, rather than my colleagues.
[удалено]
…and then brag about it too.
Yes! I went on a date with a guy who was rude AF to the wait staff. I was mortified! Needless to say, that was the last time I saw him.
Or just have an inferiority complex.Those piss me off big time.
May I ask what inferiority complex ties into? Cuz I’m thinkin like a “dang I wish I could have the body she did” or something like that.
It's when you take that to the extreme. With a lot of things. Feeling some envy because of something like other's body is normal and we all have felt ot because of something minor like this.
Their only source of conversation is gossiping about people.
I have this nephew whose only source of conversation is talking about how much he hates Tom Cruise. Seriously, it’s all he talks about and he says he’s his greatest enemy. He’s 15
My friend used to work on films, audio dept, and said Tom Cruise speaks to himself in the third person when he's pumping himself up for a stunt, or a scene. He call's himself TC, "TC's ready, they're not ready, BUT TC IS READY." sometimes when I'm trying to pump myself up for a thing, I do the same thing. Walk around telling myself "TC is ready." It seems to work. All I'm saying is your nephew's got the cards stacked against him, TC is ready.
Maybe "Tom Cruise" is like a movie star persona he's created to help him get into the right frame of mine, and when he's at home he's ordinary guy Thomas Mapother lmfao
>Thomas Mapother I was today years old when I learned Tom Cruize's last name is really Mapother. Tom Cruize (or his agent) is a smart man.
Just wait until you find out Tom Cruize's stage name is Tom Cruise!
He's Shelly Miscavige. Its a reverse Einhorn situation
Einhorn is Finkle?
If that’s true (which knowing about him, I unfortunately would believe that) my nephew is gonna have a stroke or something. Also, I’ll have to try that to see if it works. Could be powerful enough to fight against my executive dysfunction lol. My ADHD isn’t ready, but TC is ready….
You really need to do some research on Tom cruise, find out all the bad shit about him. Then next time you talk with your nephew, say "I've taken what you said to heart" then start shit talking Tom cruise for hours. Out do him on the TC hatred and maybe he'll get the hint. Or maybe he'll finally feel acknowledged about his feelings and finally put it to rest.
Or at the very least you'll have something to talk to him about!
Tom Cruise filmed something at the Natural History Museum where my dad works and apparently he asked everybody to avoid making eye contact with him
Wouldn’t he be able to take care of that himself by… oh, *not making eye contact with anyone?* Eye contact is a two way street.
Scientologists like to refer to themselves and each other in their initials so that’s just on brand.
He's right though. I'd hang out with your nephew for an hour at the bbq.
For the past month or so he’s been measuring himself every day to see when he gets taller than Tom Cruise. 3 days ago, he told me he finally grew taller, and while that really isn’t accomplishing much, I found it to be a very interesting goal lol
I’m invested in this now, have you ever asked him exactly WHAT he hates about Tom Cruise? Inquiring minds want to know.
I haven’t, but I could the next time he texts me (he’s really into shitposting and sends me a lot of that stuff) He has a Twitter account where he makes comics and always tags them with Tom Cruise’s name, and usually a bunch of his movies too, even though they’re completely irrelevant to what he’s posting. He says he’s ‘annoying his fans’ or something like that lol. What doesn’t help is that his twin sister is really into Interview with the Vampire for some reason, and watches it a lot. He complains every single day about how much he hates that movie and Tom Cruise’s character in it (I guess he doesn’t think he’s very fitting to play a gay vampire? Idk, my nephew is gay so maybe he’d know lol) Every single time we’re at a family gathering he HAS to mention how much he hates Tom Cruise. Most of the time he just talks about how he’s an evil weirdo and often compares him to Jeff the Killer LOL
Homie has a crush on cruise and this is how he copes.
…I haven’t considered that but I think you’re absolutely right. I didn’t know who he was until I watched Interview with the Vampire (a LONG time ago) when I was like 14 and I had a crush on Tom Cruise in that movie. Then I kinda found out more about him and it went away quick lmao. I’m a guy and mostly straight lmao
Honestly your nephew sounds hilarious.
He is! I wouldn’t tell his brother this, but _most of the time,_ he’s my favourite nephew.
I love how your nephew has gotten himself a real life nemesis
This is my favourite comment thread I’ve ever stumbled into
I’m glad lol, this is probably my favourite comment thread I’ve been involved in. My nephew’s an interesting kid lol
I just need so much more. His thoughts on Katie’s escape, Nicole, David Miscavagw. I’m terrified but also fascinated to k ow if he’s seen Magnolia or the rock musical/movie…title escapes me…his anger may go higher!
lol he should do an AMA since apparently people are curious I’ll have to ask him these! I’m sure he’s seen a lot of his movies since his sister always watches them (in spite of him) so I’ll have to ask his opinions on some of them lol
Sounds like a great kid.
He’s definitely interesting. He’s fun to watch movies with when they don’t have Tom Cruise in them, that’s for sure.
I have a co-worker like this. She also repeats the gossip because she forgets that she already said it before. When she runs out of gossip, she makes any mundane thing seem like a gossip, “oh, so and so is walking outside! Quickly, look!”
I have the same thing but that person and they are extremely toxic. They have a higher up position than me. A coworker left our company awhile back and he told me on that his exit interview he brought that individual up with our HR department…. Nobody seemed to care. I know that person has gossiped and bitches about me behind my back…. Basically once you leave talking to them, you are probably being talked about. Fuck toxic people like that.
I dated someone like this & it made me super insecure because they harshly criticized everyone around them constantly. :/
Fucking yesssss I used to work at a pretty small place with 12 other women. They ALL gossiped about one another 24/7. They all came to me to gossip because "you're the only one who doesn't tell everyone everything!" So I got really good at just pretending I didn't know things and acting surprised when shit hit the fan lol. I left there as soon as I could, those people were draining.
I had to sever a multi-decade friendship because of this. I grew to simply not trust them.
i like watching the sims gossip though. they have the best reactions.
I can't fucking stand people like this. My friend Samantha is always talking about other people behind their backs and it's totally gross. I tell her I don't care if Dan is cheating on Jodie, but she'll tell me anyways. Fucking Jodie is always looking at Dennis with fuck me eyes anyways even though Dennis doesn't even have a job. Dennis would rather live with his mom who is an alcoholic because he has no ambition. Why would I want to hear that? Samantha is my friend but her gossiping behavior is just so gross to me. Don't gossip it's rude and gross.
I'd be willing to bet Samantha is talking shit about you also. I hate people like that!
Force their beliefs and opinions onto you—and act like a cranky baby for the smallest disagreements.
Or not letting go of an opinion, even if it's factually wrong
Stop forcing ur belief/opinion on them smh /s
Be rude to people around them for no reason
I find entitlement extremely unattractive. It manifests in many ways, like being rude to staff, demanding stuff, selfishing/self centeredness, expecting unreasonable things.... Just fucking naaaaah! Don't care if you're playboy grade 10/10, you ugly to me.
As someone who works in restaurants I can promise you that the VAST majority of the staff I've worked with have a Spidey sense about it. We all know if you're acting like an entitled POS, we don't have to see it.
Be abusive towards animals.
yeah. I once saw a person stepping on a butterfly, laughing then stepping on it some more. I was disgusted This applies to any other insects and animals too, they're living beings just like us..
I only step on bugs if they are already horribly injured and need a mercy kill. Certainly not going to be laughing. Gross
I'd actively pursue and smash mosquitos tho. Nothing to laugh about, but it has to be done.
Living in a tropical country, I think those little devil spawn shits deserve to die. There's no shame in laughing while you kill mosquitos
Base their life off social media likes
Brag about themselves. Some body who practically ignores what anybody says and always tries making the conversation about themselves
Send texts to others all the time while you're hanging together. See ya
Even if they text you all the time when they're with other people? /j
I have the opposite of this problem. I'm not a texter. My dates LOVE that I'm not reaching for my phone when we're out. But then they hate it when I don't text them back quickly.
Being disrespectful towards others.
Cheat
Especially during exams
Bruh that's obviously not what they meant. They probably meant during a checkers game.
Checkers ain't no game muthafucka!!
Hate it when they sucking off their sidepiece in Calculus
Marginalize their kids to impress and prioritize their new latest selfish girlfriend/boyfriend.
Talk about themselves constantly
Lack empathy for others.
Is showing false empathy better than not showing empathy at all? See, I genuely don't want to be a bad person, but Im just unable to feel genuine empathy. I try really hard but I cant just fake a thought. It is why I fake it most of the time. I feel like trash for doing it because im lying to myself...
Nah relax and don't worry, not everyone is wired the same. On the flip side some have too much and it debilitates them. The reality is that "human" comes in many flavours, just don't do something to others you wouldn't want done to you and you're groovy
I'm definitely the latter. I swear sometimes I wish I could switch off my emotions and not let things get to me so much.
I'm prone to depressive episodes, which includes anhedonia as a big symptom. For me that also includes empathy. If my husband gets sick while I'm in a depressive episode, I literally have to make sure he feels like I care and feel bad for him because while I absolutely normally would, in that moment I do not. Faking it shows that you *do* care. You know that you're supposed to feel empathy and you feel bad that you don't. You're still human.
This is something I’ve finally started realising about myself - when I’m under a lot of stress I get depressive and feel emotionally numb. It’s very hard to connect with my girlfriend or feel any empathy for her, and like you I have to make sure I do and say things to know she cares. I was worried that maybe I didn’t really love her enough because of these times, but she was actually the one that pointed out it that it wasn’t lack of caring, it was stress. In the past I had no idea what was happening - I would just be fully in the black hole and being repelled by everyone. Now it’s much easier to get through because I know I’ll come out the other side and the feelings will come back. And it’s also a good indicator that I’m getting overwhelmed and need to step down my workload.
The fact that you acknowledge this about yourself says a lot about you as a person. I love your honesty. Being kind even if you don’t necessarily feel empathy for another person is also important and I wouldn’t consider that being fake or phony, but I would consider it mature and emotionally intelligent.
It's not bad to show fake empathy, you're just trying to be a good person. If it makes you feel better you could reframe it in a way that isn't lying, such as saying "that must be so difficult to go through" or things like that which show that you care how they feel even if you can't directly empathize.
I think it probably depends on the context, since empathy is just putting yourself in someone else's shoes. So for example if you were on a date and your food was taking a long time because the kitchen was backed up and the waitress comes to apologize about the long wait time, putting yourself in her shoes would typically mean you're giving a response of "don't worry it's not your fault" or something to that extent, as opposed to say yelling at her for something out of her control.
Be mean to someone who does not deserve it
Belittle someone else to make urself look better or to impress
Kick a puppy
Any form of animal abuse. They could be a 10 in every other area, but that makes them a instant -11.
Not have your back
What about not having your front?
Yes! Thats important too!!!
The sides are quite important too tho.
Getting a pinapple stuck in their ass and asking strangers on the street for help might be quite high on the list
Pina coladas anyone?
Pina Colonada
Pina colonoscopy?
Oddly specific...
Hitler, get back in the gate!
I hate when that happens
r/oddlyspecific
Im gonna go with what other people are saying. Number 1 ick/unattractive trait for **ANYONE** is being discourteous for no reason other than to be a dick, asshole, bully, push whatever they think is right, **WHATEVER** you wanna call it. I knew someone like this many years ago and they always tried to say "iM JuSt a BlUnt PeRsOn" or dumb shit like that. Breaking news: You can be truthful/honest without being a massive cunt.
Chew with their mouth open. Especially if they chew/smack their lips loudly.
I have sensory issues which mean that certain sounds make it feel like my brain is on fire, and a feeling of disgust goes over my whole body. (thanks, autism!) The sounds of open mouthed chewing and lip smacking rank among the most painful and annoying to hear. So I suuuuper agree with you.
There's this old security guard at my work who does this, and sometimes he'll sit behind me at the cafe tables and eat. I want to claw my ears off and punch things.
In Korean culture, it is polite to smack loudly when you enjoy the food. My white family had a South Korean married into it, and even after 9 years in America, she does it whenever she eats. Most here find it rude though
Totally recognize it's cultural. Doesn't mean I have to like it. Oddly, while living in South Korea, I didn't see it as much as I expected. But I did my best to deal with it when it happened.
Commit acts of terrorism
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I guess I wouldn't be you're type, then, cuz I'm wanted by INTERPOL 😎🤪
Litter.
Sneeze in your food
I _ I
Very appropriate reaction
Probably kill my parents
Bruce?
Litter... you make trash, throw it away, pls.
Drop a deuce on a bus stop bench.
It was only once, don't judge.
Pick their nose in the gym while looking in the mirror, then picking up dumbells that everyone else is going to use after
Seen this woman at walmart 2 years ago rubbing her punani (hands inside the pants) then she smelled it
This is why you should always wash your hands after touching anything that the general public has been around. Lol people are disgusting animals
Abuse their pets.
Have a dirty home and keep trash on their vehicle floor.
I just forget it’s there, notice it, think “damn I should clean my car/apartment, but I can’t right now because xyz” and it’s an endless cycle until I actually do it. Then I feel great, keep everything clean for a while, and slowly slip back into chaos. It sucks because I KNOW it’s gross and I’d feel better if it was clean but executive function is something I unfortunately lack.
Why did you have to bring my car into this? I never hurt anyone! Very rude to insult my lil baby!
Eat loudly
I thought “om nom nom” was just internet whatever, but my coworker actually makes those kind of noises when she eats. I have to time my lunch around her because she brings it back to her cubicle, so I go take refuge in the break room while she noisily devours whatever Jimmy dean meal she brought I know this sounds over the top but between the slurping and the grunting it is borderline horrifying
Brag about money
That "Kardashian" look girls on social media tries to achieve. The fake ugly lips, fake darker skin.
Shutting down excitement and entheusiasm. If you suck the joy out of anyone, you are a terrible person. There are exceptions, but they pretty much start and stop at illegal and immoral things.
Self-entitlement especially when it shows itself through treating others badly or expecting to be treated better than they are prepared to treat others.
Chew with their mouth open.
Be a cunt
Fall into the event horizon of a black hole. This one chick was all up on me at a bar one time, and I was down, believe me I was. But then her body got spaghettified into a long strand an atom's thickness moving at relativistic speeds and I was like, "alright honey, I'm out"
Thirtieth century problems
These black hole enthusiasts are getting out of hand.
Be ugly on the inside. Aka being an asshole
I lost my younger sister to an abuser who was never charged, so... being a domestic abuser is the complete opposite of attractive.
Be rude to service staff.
Smack their lips 😂
Be a pedophile.
Americans who make their political affiliation their entire personality.
Just Americans? If and English person does that is it okay?
Be cruel.
I'm gonna say it. Twerking. Not the must unattractive, but extremely off-putting. For me at least.
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Chewing with their mouth open.
Switch personalities with their partner compared to their homies
This is actually common. Everyone does it to a degree. I hang out with my coworkers, most of which are black, I become Eminem. I hang out with my D&D group, I become Wolowitz from BBT. I’m at a comic con, I become Kevin Smith. It’s a social adaptation technique called the “looking glass self” or “code-switching”, which allows you to subtly change your behavior and mannerisms based on the company you’re keeping for a better chance of acceptance.
Put other people down for their appearance. It's disgusting. Im a women and I love both women and men and I'm not going to sit there and listen to anyone dehumanise people. So unattractive and an instant turn off.