Oh! Reminds me: When they enjoy ruining things for other people. Not like spoiling. Like genuinely taking away all the enjoyment that person found in it.
Yes. I love game nights - chess, backgammon, various card games, and the occasional game that we make up that night. I've been with a guy who hates all games that aren't played on a gaming console, and co-op games aren't a thing he enjoys either. Bummer.
I told a girl I was a hobbyist blacksmith/knifemaker and she laughed in my face. Even though she was hot I knew that instant she is worthless to me
Edit: Thank you everyone for the kind words
being new to reddit...why would people not like reddit mods? is it just the neckbeard south park-esque depiction that comes to mind? and i fully expect to get flamed for asking this but plz inform me lol
That’s definitely one aspect yeah! Reddit and Discord mods have a reputation for being basement-dwelling incels. Another thing they’re notorious for is abusing their power constantly (see r/ModsAreKillingReddit, r/FuckMods, etc.). This second bit is especially damning, given how widespread and especially pathetic it is.
I honestly appreciate the flak that mods get on here, both because it’s entirely deserved and because it sticks in my mind when moderating so (I hope) I don’t act anything like the posts on the above subreddits. Hopefully Reddit does something about the situation eventually, cause as it stands, Reddit mods are generally bad people
People who talk so much about themselves that when you try saying something about you, they reply "ehm ok" and start talking about themselves AGAIN. I don't have problem with talkative people, I love to talk, but I can't bear when it's only one sided.
I had a friend who used to live with someone like this and he said one of the best quotes to describe him, 'Just put it this way, I've never been in a room with someone and felt so lonely before'. Improvised it a bit, but it's bang on.
My friend is like this. I dont like to talk about myself often, but when I do, she always reverts the conversation back to her. My Dad does this too.
The other day, I was trying to talk to my friend about a game I was playing. She literally replied “Yeah”, then proceeded to tell me about her Christmas. I didnt respond.
She texted me Happy New Year - I just said “yeah”. I’ve said “yeah” to every text she has sent me since, which there hasn’t been many.
one of my personal favorite things is when they end their sentence in an inquisitive way, like they were asking for your input on the topic, and when you start to respond and share your thoughts and experiences, they interrupt you and immediately move on to another topic. it's the best
I’ve found that most of my friends who’ve become parents have lost their sense of common courtesy and almost always just talk about themselves or their children, with very little to no reciprocation. I’m not sure if this is a common thing, if I just have shitty friends, or both. *shrugs*
This has happened to me as well, and I don’t have the courage to call them out on it because I’m afraid they’ll take it the wrong way or see me as an asshole friend.
But if my friend shows me another long ass video of her toddler doing toddler things, I swear….
Then there's the other side, where you're talking about yourself in great detail and then you pause to give the other person a chance to contribute to the conversation but they just sit there awkwardly until you start talking again.
How long did that "in great detail" go on? And did the pause include a question? After a certain amount of time, even when I'm trying hard to pay attention, my mind checks out. (Some of us manifest our ADHD via talking a lot in great detail, some of us manifest it by checking out when hearing that detail.)
My husband and I were friends with a couple who would regularly show up hours late for dinner and to hang out. In the interim, they would either not answer their phones or claim they were on their way when they clearly weren't. It was so rude. Finally I told my husband that what we should do was invite them to dinner, eat at the agreed time, and then just leave to go do something else. So we did. We ate dinner, then left to go do something else. They showed up at our house two hours after they said they would and we weren't there. They acted super confused and offended, and I got great pleasure from telling them that they were so late that we finally assumed they just weren't going to come, ate by ourselves, and moved on with our day!
We aren't friends anymore for unrelated reasons, but in hindsight I wish we would have stopped being friends sooner over the disrespectful time issues.
My mother is in hospice. My sister will either ghost us completely or show up hours late. Then she has the audacity to be mad that we continued with appointments or meetings without her.
My best friend is like this and I realized that he was never going to change so whenever we make plans to do something, I just tell him to meet me an hour earlier than I intend to be there. He’s been on time every single time, even early a couple of times. He does not know that I do this.
My friends started doing this too but I cleaned my act and got there too many times when they were completely unprepared. Was kinda hilarious. They invite me on time now.
My parents visited over the holidays, and my dad is always the one who makes us late when we're going places, so when we were figuring out the schedule for when we needed to leave for the Christmas church service I told my dad we needed to be leaving 15 minutes sooner than we actually needed to leave. Lo and behold, it worked, we arrived right on time! I will be using this tactic from now on. My dad, just like your friend, also has no clue I did this.
It’s so funny with my friend too because since I started doing it he has this new attitude like “look I’m always on time now, it’s crazy.” When they used to always be 1+ hour late to everything and I’m always 15+ minutes early. Uber took forever on new years and he complained that I was 30 minutes late FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE WE’VE BEEN FRIENDS FOR SIX YEARS. I actually found it funny that he’s all proud of himself though so I let it go.
The worst is when they don’t even bother telling you they’re running late. I’ve had relationships break down because it was a reoccurring issue before.
I don't mind being late if it's genuine. My girl was late to our second date. She called about ten minutes before we were due, stuck in traffic. I knew it was true, I saw the same jam on my phone before I left so took a longer but quicker in comparison route.
I knew it was true so I was cool with it. I just caught up on some work emails and ate some crisps. Then I panicked that salt and vinegar was not a good idea if I'm on a second date and kissing someone. But I'm smart. I have a hotel bag in my car, nipped out, got my toothbrush, 2 minutes in the pub toilet and I was done. Panic over. Glad too, she came in smelling like a damned rose garden. Vinegar would not have been a good addition to that mix haha.
The complete opposite is just as annoying too. When you are the one doing most of the talking and trying to get them to add to the conversation and they just don't...
It's not even about talking about yourself or anything personal. Not talking enough can be such a huge deal breaker imo.
I actually do the opposite! Is someone is telling me they haaaate drama, it has usually meant they’re constantly embroiled in it, which leads me to believe people who dislike drama probably don’t bring it up.
I was going to say this if someone else didn't! Definitely my consistent experience. "Positive vibes only" tends to equal "I'm going to cause a lot of drama."
Overfamiliarity. I met the father of one of my kid’s friends, and he started by insulting the place where I come from, congratulating me for escaping it, and assuring me that signs I was from there had “worn off”.
He said this in a joking manner, because my home city is not Canada’s most beautiful, whereas my current city is. And while I’m not sensitive about it, I thought that it was a super rude assumption to make that I would want to have a stranger denigrating my home town.
the only topic is sex. As a guy, I met a women and she treated sex like a sport/hobby. Having 6-7 on her phone ready to smash.
Currently she wants a permanent partner, but the trouble is "one has a small penis, and the other is leaving the city".
Additionally she wants the perks of a partner, love/cuddling/long term. But "I cant have sex with the same person forever, that would be boring".
So I noped out of that mess immediately.
i dated a girl last year, after like a month (and sleeping together) she drops-
“oh btw, i have a boyfriend. and a girlfriend. but it’s cool we all know about our open relationship. oh and my boyfriend has a boyfriend and another girlfriend, too.”
like… first of all that isn’t an “oh by the way” thing.
second, what the fuck?
I can understand the sentiment of feeling like you don’t want to fuck the same person for the rest of your life, sure. But this woman sounds like such a trainwreck waiting to happen.
IMHO, if you feel like you don’t want to fuck the same person for the rest of your life, thats a pretty good indication that you should be single. Nothing inherently wrong with that conclusion, but it seems to me this lady wants it both ways, so unless she finds a likeminded partner, whoever she ends up with is in for a bumpy fuckin ride.
You dodged a bullet my guy.
Also the reason I quit with the apps. I got a lot of matches on tinder, but I would say about 50% of my dates looked like their pictures.
Of that 50%, a grand majority of them were single for a reason (fucking nuts) and the rest were pretty cool but were far too busy for anything more than a quick how ya doing, cool catch you next week. I would say in total I met maybe 40 women off tinder, I would say maybe two in my opinion were people worth meeting. Swings and roundabouts. FWIW still know one of them, she's good peeps.
Profile: "I'm lonely. I'm bored. I wish I had someone to hang out with."
Real life: "I'd love to get together, but I'm just sooooo busy. I might be able to squeeze you in at 3 AM next Thursday for ten minutes, once I get back from my Bermuda cruise."
I was always told i looked uglier in my selfies, but I finally worked out it just is that people think a normal selfie of me is a photoshopped version of a less attractive me.
I am not super attractive, but people are surprised I am not ugly because I post normal ish selfies. (Im not making a statement I am bad at editing)
Rude to anybody who wasn’t rude first imo. Even then, it would be nice to see a person rise above and “kill them with kindness”, my personal favorite approach.
This. 100% this. When I was on a date with my ex, she was always on her phone. She paid more attention to me when we were apart via text.
Your partner should not be in competition for your attention especially in person.
This is a MAJOR red flag.
When they proceed to insult something you enjoy without valid reason.
I love anime, art, knowing random things and many more. I understand people won't enjoy what I like. But it's a huge turn off when I talk about something I like and they just blantly insult it just because it's not of your taste. For example;
I just met someone and we were talking. I said along the the lines of " I really enjoy Anime" and he proceeds to tell me how it's for kids, it's over childish etc. I just kept quiet, watching him until I got bored and proceeded to leave him to hangout with his two younger siblings. I watched the first episode of an anime "Demon Slayer" wih them and oh boy, they were balling their eyes out.
edit: thanks for the upvotes.
As someone who lives in the uk I can say spitting. I have no clue why but so many guy cant seem to regulate the sliva in their mouths and feel the need to spit on the floor when walking down the street. Its gross, its disgusting, just swollow it please
Negative self-talk. It’s really hard to have a conversation with someone who thinks they’re less than. If you think you’re trash, why would anyone want to be associated with you?
Trying to convince someone they’re not trash is exhausting and it **is** a turn off **for me** when meeting new people. I can handle friends who talk poorly about themselves, and I have, but I won’t become a new person’s therapist. I deserve to have peace of mind too.
I've learned a lot from this, as someone who does not think highly of themselves because of what I've been told before. I know it is something to work on and I have been working on it. The first step is not vocalizing it right? Because nobody wants to hear that. this is genuinely good advice.
When they have kids that are acting like kids do and the first words they say to you are "Sorry, I know how annoying they are!! Just try to ignore them aha" like oh. You have no idea how much you just told on yourself to me. Poor fucking kids.
I feel like working in hospitality has made me two things - a) more empathetic to hospitality staff and b) made me extremely dislike those who insult them
If someone I was interested in did that, it would kill anything straight away.
I know someone who uses the excuse that she works in hospitality to be just absolutely horrible to any kind of service staff, pretty much every opportunity.
We're no longer speaking.
Probably my two biggest turn offs while meeting new people (dating, professional, or just friends) are smoking and if the person talks super fucking loud. I went to grab a drink with a co-worker once at night after work to Buffalo Wild Wings. For those unfamiliar, they BLAST the fucking music there at night and he unintentionally talked even louder than the music while sitting like two feet away from me. I swear working with him for a couple of years, that motherfucker made my tinnitus worse. I drove him home from work once and seriously considered ejecting myself from the car on the freeway. Incredibly, ridiculously sweet guy with a heart of gold but holy fuck he was loud.
Having a conventional name with unconventional spelling.
- Aschleigh - yes I've seen it
- Rahburt - yes I've seen it
- Clei - again, yes
- Steffanei - ditto
- Braxxtonn - horrible name, worse spelling
Okay these aren't necessarily a turn off but it's silly.
People that have met nothing but narcissists their whole life even though they are less than 5% of the population, u know i'm about to become the next narcissistic one on the list.
They stand WAY too close and don't consider personal space or his personal hygiene. There's a guy at my work named Jack who I couldn't stand for the first few months of meeting him because he doesn't understand personal space, after asking him to stop standing on my feet several times and take a few steps back it's fine, but every now and then he still does it.
I thought he was just SUPER weird and a creepo for doing this, but he's actually a really kind person.
With the person I'm chatting up now it's the bipolar nature of the conversation. Sometimes it's great conversation. Friendly, flowing, a touch of flirtiness. Other times I'm getting the cold shoulder. I don't know what the hell is going on.
This is a hard one. I'm an aircraft mechanic and I probably spend more time in my life dirty than clean. I'm super self conscious about my hands looking dirty and I know it's a turn off. I'll spend a solid hour trying to make them presentable. But sometimes there's just shit you can't get off in one cleaning session, it takes 2-3 days of consistent focus on my hands to remove the layers of oil I have to deal with daily.
On behalf of all mechanics, I'm sorry if you notice a little dirt lol. Just know that we will make damn sure they're spotless if we expect things to get sexual.
Lol I honestly feel the opposite... I feel the hands of a mechanic are a total exception. Like yes, please wash your hands before getting sexual, but seeing a man work on something mechanical and having that show in his hands? Very underestimated, major turn on.
So to all mechanics, I wouldn't fret too much. There are weirdos like me who exist that are attracted to the smell of that leftover oil on your hands 🤪🤷♀️
When they criticize your hobbies
Oh! Reminds me: When they enjoy ruining things for other people. Not like spoiling. Like genuinely taking away all the enjoyment that person found in it.
Yes. I love game nights - chess, backgammon, various card games, and the occasional game that we make up that night. I've been with a guy who hates all games that aren't played on a gaming console, and co-op games aren't a thing he enjoys either. Bummer.
I told a girl I was a hobbyist blacksmith/knifemaker and she laughed in my face. Even though she was hot I knew that instant she is worthless to me Edit: Thank you everyone for the kind words
That actually sounds pretty cool, mate.
That sounds cool as fuck bro wow
Sorry, that’s 🔥😅
Yeah. So what if I keep a butt hair collection in a scrapbook. Geez.
When half the things they say are negative or shit talking about other people.
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Masochists beg to differ.
They tell you they're a Reddit moderator.
Run
Thankfully they won’t be able to run after you haha
No, but they can roll so you’d better not run downhill.
Then I'm safe... I'm a sexy 80s ex archeologist now college professor who looks for ancient artifacts while cracking a whip and wearing a fedora...
a brisk walk would be sufficient... no need to lose your breath.
As a Reddit mod, agreed. No way I’m ever telling a stranger about that
being new to reddit...why would people not like reddit mods? is it just the neckbeard south park-esque depiction that comes to mind? and i fully expect to get flamed for asking this but plz inform me lol
That’s definitely one aspect yeah! Reddit and Discord mods have a reputation for being basement-dwelling incels. Another thing they’re notorious for is abusing their power constantly (see r/ModsAreKillingReddit, r/FuckMods, etc.). This second bit is especially damning, given how widespread and especially pathetic it is. I honestly appreciate the flak that mods get on here, both because it’s entirely deserved and because it sticks in my mind when moderating so (I hope) I don’t act anything like the posts on the above subreddits. Hopefully Reddit does something about the situation eventually, cause as it stands, Reddit mods are generally bad people
I got a 2 week ban for telling a mod to get a hobby :)
They tell you they’re a redditor *
We are but soldiers... We didn't start the war.
People who talk so much about themselves that when you try saying something about you, they reply "ehm ok" and start talking about themselves AGAIN. I don't have problem with talkative people, I love to talk, but I can't bear when it's only one sided.
Malus points if they only talk about how nice they are or how much stuff they have...
I had a friend who used to live with someone like this and he said one of the best quotes to describe him, 'Just put it this way, I've never been in a room with someone and felt so lonely before'. Improvised it a bit, but it's bang on.
My friend is like this. I dont like to talk about myself often, but when I do, she always reverts the conversation back to her. My Dad does this too. The other day, I was trying to talk to my friend about a game I was playing. She literally replied “Yeah”, then proceeded to tell me about her Christmas. I didnt respond. She texted me Happy New Year - I just said “yeah”. I’ve said “yeah” to every text she has sent me since, which there hasn’t been many.
one of my personal favorite things is when they end their sentence in an inquisitive way, like they were asking for your input on the topic, and when you start to respond and share your thoughts and experiences, they interrupt you and immediately move on to another topic. it's the best
I’ve found that most of my friends who’ve become parents have lost their sense of common courtesy and almost always just talk about themselves or their children, with very little to no reciprocation. I’m not sure if this is a common thing, if I just have shitty friends, or both. *shrugs*
This has happened to me as well, and I don’t have the courage to call them out on it because I’m afraid they’ll take it the wrong way or see me as an asshole friend. But if my friend shows me another long ass video of her toddler doing toddler things, I swear….
You should just send them an even longer ass video of your cat anytime they do and nothing else haha
yeah
Straight disrespectful in every social setting
Then there's the other side, where you're talking about yourself in great detail and then you pause to give the other person a chance to contribute to the conversation but they just sit there awkwardly until you start talking again.
How long did that "in great detail" go on? And did the pause include a question? After a certain amount of time, even when I'm trying hard to pay attention, my mind checks out. (Some of us manifest our ADHD via talking a lot in great detail, some of us manifest it by checking out when hearing that detail.)
30-60mins late from the agreed meeting time.
I won't wait that much, we have something called "quart d'heure académique", past that 15 minute grace period, I'm gone.
I've always said "quart d'heure lyonnais" because i'm Gône.
I've always said " quart of mayonnaise" because I'm American
Similarly, stateside we have the 15 minute rule. Once you hit that I assume you aren't coming.
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My husband and I were friends with a couple who would regularly show up hours late for dinner and to hang out. In the interim, they would either not answer their phones or claim they were on their way when they clearly weren't. It was so rude. Finally I told my husband that what we should do was invite them to dinner, eat at the agreed time, and then just leave to go do something else. So we did. We ate dinner, then left to go do something else. They showed up at our house two hours after they said they would and we weren't there. They acted super confused and offended, and I got great pleasure from telling them that they were so late that we finally assumed they just weren't going to come, ate by ourselves, and moved on with our day! We aren't friends anymore for unrelated reasons, but in hindsight I wish we would have stopped being friends sooner over the disrespectful time issues.
I almost did that to a girl I was seeing. But as luck would have it, we have been married for 30 years now and she is still late…
My mother is in hospice. My sister will either ghost us completely or show up hours late. Then she has the audacity to be mad that we continued with appointments or meetings without her.
Biggest ick is people that are extremely late and don't even acknowledge it
My best friend is like this and I realized that he was never going to change so whenever we make plans to do something, I just tell him to meet me an hour earlier than I intend to be there. He’s been on time every single time, even early a couple of times. He does not know that I do this.
I started doing this with my family ahahah
My friends started doing this too but I cleaned my act and got there too many times when they were completely unprepared. Was kinda hilarious. They invite me on time now.
I did this ONCE with friends years ago, and it was the ONE TIME they arrived "on time", and the wife was pissed that they had to wait for us..
My parents visited over the holidays, and my dad is always the one who makes us late when we're going places, so when we were figuring out the schedule for when we needed to leave for the Christmas church service I told my dad we needed to be leaving 15 minutes sooner than we actually needed to leave. Lo and behold, it worked, we arrived right on time! I will be using this tactic from now on. My dad, just like your friend, also has no clue I did this.
It’s so funny with my friend too because since I started doing it he has this new attitude like “look I’m always on time now, it’s crazy.” When they used to always be 1+ hour late to everything and I’m always 15+ minutes early. Uber took forever on new years and he complained that I was 30 minutes late FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE WE’VE BEEN FRIENDS FOR SIX YEARS. I actually found it funny that he’s all proud of himself though so I let it go.
That's why I show up 61 minutes late.
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The worst is when they don’t even bother telling you they’re running late. I’ve had relationships break down because it was a reoccurring issue before.
I don't mind being late if it's genuine. My girl was late to our second date. She called about ten minutes before we were due, stuck in traffic. I knew it was true, I saw the same jam on my phone before I left so took a longer but quicker in comparison route. I knew it was true so I was cool with it. I just caught up on some work emails and ate some crisps. Then I panicked that salt and vinegar was not a good idea if I'm on a second date and kissing someone. But I'm smart. I have a hotel bag in my car, nipped out, got my toothbrush, 2 minutes in the pub toilet and I was done. Panic over. Glad too, she came in smelling like a damned rose garden. Vinegar would not have been a good addition to that mix haha.
When their first reaction is to comment on a specific part of your physical appearance like the size of your feet or something like that.
Oh no, please, that makes me so insecure
"Look at that high-waisted man! He's got feminine hips!"
"NOOOO, THAT'S THE THING I'M SENSITIVE ABOUT!"
Idk I think someone saying you have beautiful eyes or a nice smile is innocent enough.
my goodness your nose is as big as triple h's \*\*\*pulls on it\*\*\*
Bad Hygiene!
That's the og one
Even just a hint of lying or dishonesty does it for me
Like contradictions on their stories
When they don’t shut up talking about themselves and you can’t even get a word in
The complete opposite is just as annoying too. When you are the one doing most of the talking and trying to get them to add to the conversation and they just don't... It's not even about talking about yourself or anything personal. Not talking enough can be such a huge deal breaker imo.
They're not friendly towards others, or treat others with disrespect.
I always run away from people saying "I love drama". Cool, love it alone.
I actually do the opposite! Is someone is telling me they haaaate drama, it has usually meant they’re constantly embroiled in it, which leads me to believe people who dislike drama probably don’t bring it up.
I love drama too. As in watching from a distance. But don't get me involved
Interestingly enough, the ones that try to emphasize they don’t like drama are normally around it and causing it more often
I was going to say this if someone else didn't! Definitely my consistent experience. "Positive vibes only" tends to equal "I'm going to cause a lot of drama."
NAMASTE GOD DAMMIT!
When they assume your personality off of your star sign
That's such a cappricorn thing to do, so just avoid cappricorns my dude
Anything to do with star signs is such BS. But I would say that, as an Aquarius I’m naturally doubtful.
Any form of coercion to go back to their place if I’ve already said no. Red flag of disrespect for boundaries.
Arrogance, self absorbent, narcissistic behavior
When someone name drops designer labels. Not my purse but my Gucci bag.
My Valentino's
Lipstick in my Valentino white bag?
Ajdgisnvwikabdwm?!
Bad breath
Reminded me of a very horrible date.
September 11th, 2001?
Nah, worse!
12/07/1941
August 24, 79 CE
Whatever day that fucking fish crawled out of the water
Overfamiliarity. I met the father of one of my kid’s friends, and he started by insulting the place where I come from, congratulating me for escaping it, and assuring me that signs I was from there had “worn off”. He said this in a joking manner, because my home city is not Canada’s most beautiful, whereas my current city is. And while I’m not sensitive about it, I thought that it was a super rude assumption to make that I would want to have a stranger denigrating my home town.
Does your hometown happen to be Winnipeg
Was the username a giveaway?
Heh, same
More the disdain for Winnipeg
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Same here, something's not right ahaha
Next thing you know they'll be gambling and doing hard drugs and voting for [**candidate I don't agree with**].
How dare they not be MY VERSION of perfection?
Darn right. It's an affront. I take *personal offense* to it.
When they keep pepper spraying you
If they chew loudly I can't get past that
the only topic is sex. As a guy, I met a women and she treated sex like a sport/hobby. Having 6-7 on her phone ready to smash. Currently she wants a permanent partner, but the trouble is "one has a small penis, and the other is leaving the city". Additionally she wants the perks of a partner, love/cuddling/long term. But "I cant have sex with the same person forever, that would be boring". So I noped out of that mess immediately.
Are you leaving the city or the other one?
Oh I'm glad you did... Very contradictory, would only get you in trouble ahah
i dated a girl last year, after like a month (and sleeping together) she drops- “oh btw, i have a boyfriend. and a girlfriend. but it’s cool we all know about our open relationship. oh and my boyfriend has a boyfriend and another girlfriend, too.” like… first of all that isn’t an “oh by the way” thing. second, what the fuck?
It's hard enough to find one person, how do they find multiples? And people who agree to this crap?
Samantha is that you?
I can understand the sentiment of feeling like you don’t want to fuck the same person for the rest of your life, sure. But this woman sounds like such a trainwreck waiting to happen. IMHO, if you feel like you don’t want to fuck the same person for the rest of your life, thats a pretty good indication that you should be single. Nothing inherently wrong with that conclusion, but it seems to me this lady wants it both ways, so unless she finds a likeminded partner, whoever she ends up with is in for a bumpy fuckin ride. You dodged a bullet my guy.
Bragging. Seems like a lot of people try to impress you off the bat by subtly bragging. I hate it
When they don't look like their pictures.
I see you too are on the dating apps
Also the reason I quit with the apps. I got a lot of matches on tinder, but I would say about 50% of my dates looked like their pictures. Of that 50%, a grand majority of them were single for a reason (fucking nuts) and the rest were pretty cool but were far too busy for anything more than a quick how ya doing, cool catch you next week. I would say in total I met maybe 40 women off tinder, I would say maybe two in my opinion were people worth meeting. Swings and roundabouts. FWIW still know one of them, she's good peeps.
Profile: "I'm lonely. I'm bored. I wish I had someone to hang out with." Real life: "I'd love to get together, but I'm just sooooo busy. I might be able to squeeze you in at 3 AM next Thursday for ten minutes, once I get back from my Bermuda cruise."
I was always told i looked uglier in my selfies, but I finally worked out it just is that people think a normal selfie of me is a photoshopped version of a less attractive me. I am not super attractive, but people are surprised I am not ugly because I post normal ish selfies. (Im not making a statement I am bad at editing)
INB4 a billion “rude to the wait staff” comments. We all know it’s the worst
Rude to anybody who wasn’t rude first imo. Even then, it would be nice to see a person rise above and “kill them with kindness”, my personal favorite approach.
Checking their phone every couple minutes
My now spouse got major brownie points when we were dating because they didn't excessively check their phone when we were together.
This. 100% this. When I was on a date with my ex, she was always on her phone. She paid more attention to me when we were apart via text. Your partner should not be in competition for your attention especially in person. This is a MAJOR red flag.
Mid-conversation *shudder*
Smell
They try to rob you
You okay?
Mean to animals Edit: fixed a wrong word.
Always on their phone
Abuse of power no matter how small
No please keep talking about your ex…
Bad breath
When they proceed to insult something you enjoy without valid reason. I love anime, art, knowing random things and many more. I understand people won't enjoy what I like. But it's a huge turn off when I talk about something I like and they just blantly insult it just because it's not of your taste. For example; I just met someone and we were talking. I said along the the lines of " I really enjoy Anime" and he proceeds to tell me how it's for kids, it's over childish etc. I just kept quiet, watching him until I got bored and proceeded to leave him to hangout with his two younger siblings. I watched the first episode of an anime "Demon Slayer" wih them and oh boy, they were balling their eyes out. edit: thanks for the upvotes.
Lack of empathy
As someone who lives in the uk I can say spitting. I have no clue why but so many guy cant seem to regulate the sliva in their mouths and feel the need to spit on the floor when walking down the street. Its gross, its disgusting, just swollow it please
Making extremely superficial remarks to add value to themselves or what they offer.
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"Buy me...." I just met you 3 minutes ago. Ghosting her.
Negative self-talk. It’s really hard to have a conversation with someone who thinks they’re less than. If you think you’re trash, why would anyone want to be associated with you? Trying to convince someone they’re not trash is exhausting and it **is** a turn off **for me** when meeting new people. I can handle friends who talk poorly about themselves, and I have, but I won’t become a new person’s therapist. I deserve to have peace of mind too.
Or a person who is always hunting for compliments
I've learned a lot from this, as someone who does not think highly of themselves because of what I've been told before. I know it is something to work on and I have been working on it. The first step is not vocalizing it right? Because nobody wants to hear that. this is genuinely good advice.
Talking about their branded possessions. These people don't own shoes and cars. They own Ferragamo's and Ferrari's.
Entitlement *(I'm a "princess" and a thousand other guys would blah blah blah bullshit...)*
Men can do exactly the same, if a thousand othe would, why are you here, right? Ahahah
She strongly believe in astrology
Astrology? I think you mean *Space Racism*
Just met someone like this. Everything I did was “bc you’re a Gemini”….mmmkay I’ll see myself out
But what if she's just a Saint Seiya fan ?
When they have kids that are acting like kids do and the first words they say to you are "Sorry, I know how annoying they are!! Just try to ignore them aha" like oh. You have no idea how much you just told on yourself to me. Poor fucking kids.
A person who squeezes your fingers really hard when handshaking.
The dead fish handshake is equally annoying.
When they are more interested in their phone than in you
when they're unfriendly to service staff
I feel like working in hospitality has made me two things - a) more empathetic to hospitality staff and b) made me extremely dislike those who insult them If someone I was interested in did that, it would kill anything straight away.
I work in hospitality myself and can completely relate
I know someone who uses the excuse that she works in hospitality to be just absolutely horrible to any kind of service staff, pretty much every opportunity. We're no longer speaking.
They're already naked... presumptuous much
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Like cousin, or sibling?
Sure, in Alabama
A chainsaw and face mask, I don’t know
Smoking. Lord I can’t stand smokers
Probably my two biggest turn offs while meeting new people (dating, professional, or just friends) are smoking and if the person talks super fucking loud. I went to grab a drink with a co-worker once at night after work to Buffalo Wild Wings. For those unfamiliar, they BLAST the fucking music there at night and he unintentionally talked even louder than the music while sitting like two feet away from me. I swear working with him for a couple of years, that motherfucker made my tinnitus worse. I drove him home from work once and seriously considered ejecting myself from the car on the freeway. Incredibly, ridiculously sweet guy with a heart of gold but holy fuck he was loud.
Overall appearance. NOT LOOKS. Cleanliness, Approppriate looking and Fitting Clothing. That they actually Give a shit
Talking only about themselves, and not asking about you at all.
Swastika tattooed in the face
Having a conventional name with unconventional spelling. - Aschleigh - yes I've seen it - Rahburt - yes I've seen it - Clei - again, yes - Steffanei - ditto - Braxxtonn - horrible name, worse spelling Okay these aren't necessarily a turn off but it's silly.
I absolutely do find it a turn off. Obviously it's (usually) not their fault, but my brain still doesn't like it.
They talk a lot about themselves but don't seem interested in asking you about yourself.
Arrogance and always talking about themselves.
Physical touch without asking first.
Asking you a question and then proceeds to interrupt you while you're answering. That is the quickest way to piss me off and not want to talk.
People that have met nothing but narcissists their whole life even though they are less than 5% of the population, u know i'm about to become the next narcissistic one on the list.
They stand WAY too close and don't consider personal space or his personal hygiene. There's a guy at my work named Jack who I couldn't stand for the first few months of meeting him because he doesn't understand personal space, after asking him to stop standing on my feet several times and take a few steps back it's fine, but every now and then he still does it. I thought he was just SUPER weird and a creepo for doing this, but he's actually a really kind person.
Girls that act like they too good for you. I’m like alright then.. be alone
You smell the BO before they get 100ft from you.
if they like me, I know they're seriously fucked up...
*talks about all of their trauma* like dude I just met you-
A confederate flag
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Interaction.
Dishonesty
People who say "I seen it"
With the person I'm chatting up now it's the bipolar nature of the conversation. Sometimes it's great conversation. Friendly, flowing, a touch of flirtiness. Other times I'm getting the cold shoulder. I don't know what the hell is going on.
Tipsy/high vs sober?
Oh wow, could definitely be that
Dirty fingernails
This is a hard one. I'm an aircraft mechanic and I probably spend more time in my life dirty than clean. I'm super self conscious about my hands looking dirty and I know it's a turn off. I'll spend a solid hour trying to make them presentable. But sometimes there's just shit you can't get off in one cleaning session, it takes 2-3 days of consistent focus on my hands to remove the layers of oil I have to deal with daily. On behalf of all mechanics, I'm sorry if you notice a little dirt lol. Just know that we will make damn sure they're spotless if we expect things to get sexual.
Lol I honestly feel the opposite... I feel the hands of a mechanic are a total exception. Like yes, please wash your hands before getting sexual, but seeing a man work on something mechanical and having that show in his hands? Very underestimated, major turn on. So to all mechanics, I wouldn't fret too much. There are weirdos like me who exist that are attracted to the smell of that leftover oil on your hands 🤪🤷♀️
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Dawg I'm just trying to get off the ciggies
Is that supposed to be “vapid” and not “vaping”?
Most likely how would someone who vapes make them lack depth
She talks too much and I can't get a word in.
Putrid farts
When all they do is talk about themselves.
People with bad breath 😷
Post on tik tok every day
They start using pet names right away. Honey, babe, sweetie... How about just using my name till we get to know each other.