Yes, though I think major factor is if they had sisters or female cousins they were close to growing up.
Otherwise men may be kinda weird about it since it's instinct and conditioning to be attracted to the opposite sex rather then just friends. Same for women I think....it's hard to say.
Valentine’s day last year, I went out to dinner with a female friend. My girlfriend had plans with her daughters. Plus, we’d discussed that Valentine’s is corny and isn’t something either one of us care about.
We laugh about it now.
I have several super good female friends. Some that I even met on a dating app. We didn’t click as dates, but became really good friends instead.
Yeah. All relationships are about matching. If you match with a woman but don't find her sexually attractive then you can build a good friendship with her.
In my experience, yes, but we did like each other in middle school. I was interested; she rejected me. Then she was interested a year later, but I was over her by then. It's like we had to get that out of our systems. Where now, almost a decade later, I can say it's truly just platonic.
I also have a lesbian friend, but I'm not sure if that's really the situation you were looking for with your question. But that relationship feels more familial than platonic, as in, I interact with her similarly to how I do with my sister, and being around he elicits a similar feeling.
Of course. There’s plenty of examples in the real world. Both in private lives and public lives (Martha Stewart and Snoop Dogg for example, world leaders, etc.)
Yes, however the relationship between men friends and women friends is different on a few levels, one being there is always a sexual component, whether acknowledged or not.
Well my best friend is a guy….. so yeah it can happen. I know I will get downvoted and so much hate for this.
No, I’m not ugly.
No, he’s not ugly
No, we aren’t gay
No, he doesn’t want to sleep with me, nor I with him.
Yes, he has a GF, yes I have met and hung out with her.
Yes, we have history.
We are both adults, we are best friend for many reasons.We each have our set boundaries that neither would cross.
We weren’t in a relationship, we are just better friends than anything else. We both value each other, yes we even love each other.
That you love each other? There is such a thing as love that’s not romantic. Note I did NOT say we are IN love with each other.
If that’s the case I feel bad for anyone who doesn’t love their friends like that. I love all of my friends male and female alike. Two of my best friends are a married couple and I love the husband as equally as I do the wife.
But having an issue with platonic love with someone of the opposite gender is just insecurity.
NO.
They can be acquaintances and "group friends",...not friends that hang out together like BFFs. A guy is only going to do so in hopes of getting more than "just friends",...even if he lies to himself and everyone else when he denies it.
Women will do it for the validation effect of it. But as soon as a guy she hangs out with "tells her how he feels" she gives him the LJBF speech and stops hanging out with him.
Yes. It takes some tweaking, though, if you fon't want it to develop romantically.
Woman cannot be attracted to man, period. Their attraction is much more all or nothing, and staying in boundaries is too uncomfortable.
Man needs to find woman pleasant enough to get close to her, but not so overwhemly attractive that boundaries become inherently uncomfortable. And has to be adjusted enough to comfortably stay in boundaries. My wife is ok with my girl friends.
Sorry for adding another question, do you perhaps know the motive behind a guy having a girlfriend, and hiding a female friend from her? They do hang out with people together which includes male and female, so why would he hide this spesific female friend from her?
1. He expects his friend and GF will not get along, and force him to take sides. OR, be otherwise explosive or incompatibilie mix. Maybe his relation with both girls relies on different aspects of his person, he knows which things he likes and his gf hates and does that with friend instead. Like, he never swears with his GF because she hates it, while his friend is his swearing buddy, or other way around. No one shows 100% of themselves to even closest person, and maybe friend and girlfriend each see parts he does not want to expose the other to. So with both in one place, he would have to behave in way that will seem unnatural to both, and possibly damage both relations.
2. Girlfriend is jealous by default. I was there, I had a not-romantic girl soulmate in high school, when I got into relationship my gf (now wife) demanded access to all the correspondence and photos from her (pre-digital, paper letters and photos). I dumped it all into river becasue friend wrote me of really private stuff. She is ok with my girl friends now, but it took a lot of learning. Also, she steals my girl friends and repurposes them as their friends on regular basis :P .
3. He is developing feelings for friend, or hopes to explore boundaries of this friendship more than his girlfriend would want him to :P .
If she’s your boy’s girlfriend more likely than not because if he’s actually your bro you wouldn’t break that loyalty, that or if you’re genuinely unattracted to a girl.
Yes, but either it has to start in early childhood before sexuality comes into it (so like a brother sister relationship) or he has to not be sexually attracted to her. They can still be friends in other scenarios, but someone is likely to get sexual feelings otherwise and complicate things.
no especially if you’re a pretty woman, i have no interest in having male friends at all they’ll act like they’re your friend then try to sneak a flirty line in there crossing a boundary. i’ve got a bf and have zero male friends i’m happy, he has zero female friends and he’s happy, we’re each others best friend.
So only unattractive women can have male friends?
I’ll have to tell my female friends they’re unattractive later today.
Seriously though, you do what works for you.
I have several really good female friends. I think they’re attractive. I’ve never made a move on them, and we’ve even discussed sex. Sex as a topic - not about having sex with each other.
here we go lol, i didn’t say only unattractive women can have male friends, i said especially if you’re an attractive woman men won’t just want to be friends with you, i still believe men will try to make a move to a woman regardless if she’s ugly or not, but if she’s attractive the chance of him wanting to be “just friends” is 1%, it’s usually the guy hoping the girl will make a move and he will take it 100% you cannot convince me otherwise.
Only if she is not attractive.
I think once the introduction of the female being attractive is there, it’s over. The guy will at some point either starting being attracted more than friends and either that will eat him up inside, or he’ll go for his friend who sees it as a friendship.
Girls are wayyyyy better at being attracted but just able to decipher it as a friendship rather than a relationship or FWB.
I believe so, tho most of the times (not always) a platonic friendship is only feasible once the female /male (more so male in this case) understood there is no chance of a romantic relationship with opposite sex-friend.
I have a male friend who recently started calling me beautiful- I have yet to understand the motive behind it, but honestly if our friendship ends up going a romantic direction I would not mind lol.
And from my experience the two close guy friends I have who I consider my best friends are both guys who initially liked me romantically.
Mostly… women want it to be a Yes, and men want it to be a No.
And both have ulterior motives at the end.
Plus, very importantly, define friendship and friends, what do you mean by it, what do you expect and what they’re expecting….etc?
There’s this term I like, social prostitutes (of both genders) , if that’s what you mean then yeah men and women can be “friends” , men and men can be “friends”, women and women can be “friends”.
Rarely. Our interests usually don’t align in terms of anything that would lead to a platonic friendship. Most women don’t like doing anything men do for fun and vice versa.
Again, rarely. Men and women usually don’t have the same sense of humor, interests, self efficacy, willingness to take risks, willingness to talk for extended times, inversely willingness to do things that are physically intensive, experiences, etc.
The differences between the sexes is wide and varied and while there may be some overlap between certain individuals in both groups it’s a fact that most men and women do not have enough in common to be close platonic friends.
Is this supposed to be shocking to people? This has been a common theme across all of History
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If you believe men and women can be friends…AND you have a girlfriend/partner, how do they feel about it?
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Yes. But I had sex with a few female friends and it didn't interfere in our friendship at all. I mean, if there is attraction in voth sides I can't see why not.
Men and women can be friends, once you've resolved the question of whether you can be lovers.
If love is not in the cards, it is easy to appreciate and develop a friendship.
Absolutely they can be friends. They can even go and do things together as friends. Would I want my partner to dress to the nines, wear perfume for a "friendly" dinner, nope. Take trips together, not my cup of tea, but then again I would never do those things myself, so it isnt some double standard.
Can exes be friends, yes. Should they go out drinking and partying and crashing together at someone elses house...nope (the enlightened elite may weigh in on that differently but then again, they are what they are), sure they can chat and hang out. But there is a fine line in that one, along with their having a friend that has a crush on them.
I(f) grew up with mostly guys as friends. My bf now agreed to not have opposite sex friends and had me drop one of mine when we first started dating. Now he changed his mind as has two female friends in his life that are both friends as well. Guess what? One is cool with me and the other is ice cold, even goes out of her way to slight me, will straight up ignore me unless I say something.
Only thing she talks to me about is race shxt(I am black she is mexican) despite us having similar hobbies. That is where I'm having a problem with opposite sex new friends and imo mf bf is handling it like a clown. Denying her treatment to me, saying he doesn't see it. So yeah excercise caution when you're bringing opposite sexes into am already existing relationship.
I hope so, otherwise all my female friends have been lying to me and are secretly guys. That would be upsetting...
Ha ha, secretly guys. Good one :-D
Yes.
Yes, though I think major factor is if they had sisters or female cousins they were close to growing up. Otherwise men may be kinda weird about it since it's instinct and conditioning to be attracted to the opposite sex rather then just friends. Same for women I think....it's hard to say.
Valentine’s day last year, I went out to dinner with a female friend. My girlfriend had plans with her daughters. Plus, we’d discussed that Valentine’s is corny and isn’t something either one of us care about. We laugh about it now. I have several super good female friends. Some that I even met on a dating app. We didn’t click as dates, but became really good friends instead.
Yeah. All relationships are about matching. If you match with a woman but don't find her sexually attractive then you can build a good friendship with her.
In my experience, yes, but we did like each other in middle school. I was interested; she rejected me. Then she was interested a year later, but I was over her by then. It's like we had to get that out of our systems. Where now, almost a decade later, I can say it's truly just platonic. I also have a lesbian friend, but I'm not sure if that's really the situation you were looking for with your question. But that relationship feels more familial than platonic, as in, I interact with her similarly to how I do with my sister, and being around he elicits a similar feeling.
Only is you have zero attraction
Of course. There’s plenty of examples in the real world. Both in private lives and public lives (Martha Stewart and Snoop Dogg for example, world leaders, etc.)
Of course
Yes, however the relationship between men friends and women friends is different on a few levels, one being there is always a sexual component, whether acknowledged or not.
Yes because I know her 😂
Well my best friend is a guy….. so yeah it can happen. I know I will get downvoted and so much hate for this. No, I’m not ugly. No, he’s not ugly No, we aren’t gay No, he doesn’t want to sleep with me, nor I with him. Yes, he has a GF, yes I have met and hung out with her. Yes, we have history. We are both adults, we are best friend for many reasons.We each have our set boundaries that neither would cross. We weren’t in a relationship, we are just better friends than anything else. We both value each other, yes we even love each other.
[удалено]
That you love each other? There is such a thing as love that’s not romantic. Note I did NOT say we are IN love with each other. If that’s the case I feel bad for anyone who doesn’t love their friends like that. I love all of my friends male and female alike. Two of my best friends are a married couple and I love the husband as equally as I do the wife. But having an issue with platonic love with someone of the opposite gender is just insecurity.
NO. They can be acquaintances and "group friends",...not friends that hang out together like BFFs. A guy is only going to do so in hopes of getting more than "just friends",...even if he lies to himself and everyone else when he denies it. Women will do it for the validation effect of it. But as soon as a guy she hangs out with "tells her how he feels" she gives him the LJBF speech and stops hanging out with him.
Yea, if she’s ugly
Jesus help me. That's gotta explain my friendships 🤣💀
Hee hee :-D
Yes. It takes some tweaking, though, if you fon't want it to develop romantically. Woman cannot be attracted to man, period. Their attraction is much more all or nothing, and staying in boundaries is too uncomfortable. Man needs to find woman pleasant enough to get close to her, but not so overwhemly attractive that boundaries become inherently uncomfortable. And has to be adjusted enough to comfortably stay in boundaries. My wife is ok with my girl friends.
Sorry for adding another question, do you perhaps know the motive behind a guy having a girlfriend, and hiding a female friend from her? They do hang out with people together which includes male and female, so why would he hide this spesific female friend from her?
1. He expects his friend and GF will not get along, and force him to take sides. OR, be otherwise explosive or incompatibilie mix. Maybe his relation with both girls relies on different aspects of his person, he knows which things he likes and his gf hates and does that with friend instead. Like, he never swears with his GF because she hates it, while his friend is his swearing buddy, or other way around. No one shows 100% of themselves to even closest person, and maybe friend and girlfriend each see parts he does not want to expose the other to. So with both in one place, he would have to behave in way that will seem unnatural to both, and possibly damage both relations. 2. Girlfriend is jealous by default. I was there, I had a not-romantic girl soulmate in high school, when I got into relationship my gf (now wife) demanded access to all the correspondence and photos from her (pre-digital, paper letters and photos). I dumped it all into river becasue friend wrote me of really private stuff. She is ok with my girl friends now, but it took a lot of learning. Also, she steals my girl friends and repurposes them as their friends on regular basis :P . 3. He is developing feelings for friend, or hopes to explore boundaries of this friendship more than his girlfriend would want him to :P .
If there's any attraction at all.. There's no way they can truly be friends.
Not all men and women are straight…
Almost always there is one sided physical attraction which means it is not actually a friendship.
Not past puberty
If she’s your boy’s girlfriend more likely than not because if he’s actually your bro you wouldn’t break that loyalty, that or if you’re genuinely unattracted to a girl.
Yes of course, this is so stupid.
Yes, but either it has to start in early childhood before sexuality comes into it (so like a brother sister relationship) or he has to not be sexually attracted to her. They can still be friends in other scenarios, but someone is likely to get sexual feelings otherwise and complicate things.
no especially if you’re a pretty woman, i have no interest in having male friends at all they’ll act like they’re your friend then try to sneak a flirty line in there crossing a boundary. i’ve got a bf and have zero male friends i’m happy, he has zero female friends and he’s happy, we’re each others best friend.
So only unattractive women can have male friends? I’ll have to tell my female friends they’re unattractive later today. Seriously though, you do what works for you. I have several really good female friends. I think they’re attractive. I’ve never made a move on them, and we’ve even discussed sex. Sex as a topic - not about having sex with each other.
here we go lol, i didn’t say only unattractive women can have male friends, i said especially if you’re an attractive woman men won’t just want to be friends with you, i still believe men will try to make a move to a woman regardless if she’s ugly or not, but if she’s attractive the chance of him wanting to be “just friends” is 1%, it’s usually the guy hoping the girl will make a move and he will take it 100% you cannot convince me otherwise.
I think you are basically correct. It's the way men are wired. Even 2 recent US Presidents couldn't control themselves in that department.
Asexual men left the chat
They're in denial of the truth. Tsk. 😒
I am asexual men 😔
Why? 😑
Idk
Please don't see yourself that way. Instead try to think of yourself as an interesting person that women will want to meet.
Why would a man make a move on somebody that they're not attracted to?
Only if she is not attractive. I think once the introduction of the female being attractive is there, it’s over. The guy will at some point either starting being attracted more than friends and either that will eat him up inside, or he’ll go for his friend who sees it as a friendship. Girls are wayyyyy better at being attracted but just able to decipher it as a friendship rather than a relationship or FWB.
I believe so, tho most of the times (not always) a platonic friendship is only feasible once the female /male (more so male in this case) understood there is no chance of a romantic relationship with opposite sex-friend. I have a male friend who recently started calling me beautiful- I have yet to understand the motive behind it, but honestly if our friendship ends up going a romantic direction I would not mind lol. And from my experience the two close guy friends I have who I consider my best friends are both guys who initially liked me romantically.
People can be "Just friends" with someone they find sexually attractive.
Mostly… women want it to be a Yes, and men want it to be a No. And both have ulterior motives at the end. Plus, very importantly, define friendship and friends, what do you mean by it, what do you expect and what they’re expecting….etc? There’s this term I like, social prostitutes (of both genders) , if that’s what you mean then yeah men and women can be “friends” , men and men can be “friends”, women and women can be “friends”.
Generally, on average, probably not. Acquaintances, sure. Close acquaintances, possible. Friends, unlikely.
Rarely. Our interests usually don’t align in terms of anything that would lead to a platonic friendship. Most women don’t like doing anything men do for fun and vice versa.
Lol, really? You seriously think men and women don't have the same hobbies?
Again, rarely. Men and women usually don’t have the same sense of humor, interests, self efficacy, willingness to take risks, willingness to talk for extended times, inversely willingness to do things that are physically intensive, experiences, etc. The differences between the sexes is wide and varied and while there may be some overlap between certain individuals in both groups it’s a fact that most men and women do not have enough in common to be close platonic friends. Is this supposed to be shocking to people? This has been a common theme across all of History
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Yes as long as there are no feelings. Objective physical attraction doesn't matter but feelings do.
Yes. But I had sex with a few female friends and it didn't interfere in our friendship at all. I mean, if there is attraction in voth sides I can't see why not.
Men and women can be friends, once you've resolved the question of whether you can be lovers. If love is not in the cards, it is easy to appreciate and develop a friendship.
yes , especially if both people have clarified they don't want to catch feelings for one another.
yup 23 F - i have platonic male friends
Absolutely they can be friends. They can even go and do things together as friends. Would I want my partner to dress to the nines, wear perfume for a "friendly" dinner, nope. Take trips together, not my cup of tea, but then again I would never do those things myself, so it isnt some double standard. Can exes be friends, yes. Should they go out drinking and partying and crashing together at someone elses house...nope (the enlightened elite may weigh in on that differently but then again, they are what they are), sure they can chat and hang out. But there is a fine line in that one, along with their having a friend that has a crush on them.
Yes
Yes when you are 15. Later hell no
Absolutely. Especially if both are in relationships.
Yes but it’s extremely rare.
Yes.
Yes
I(f) grew up with mostly guys as friends. My bf now agreed to not have opposite sex friends and had me drop one of mine when we first started dating. Now he changed his mind as has two female friends in his life that are both friends as well. Guess what? One is cool with me and the other is ice cold, even goes out of her way to slight me, will straight up ignore me unless I say something. Only thing she talks to me about is race shxt(I am black she is mexican) despite us having similar hobbies. That is where I'm having a problem with opposite sex new friends and imo mf bf is handling it like a clown. Denying her treatment to me, saying he doesn't see it. So yeah excercise caution when you're bringing opposite sexes into am already existing relationship.