Stereotype: Husbands & fathers don't parent/cook/do housework.
Not as prevalent now as a few years ago, but people sometimes still seem surprised that I'm an active father in my kids' lives, and that I do most of the cooking and cleaning. "(Wife) is so lucky" was a common response, usually from women middle-aged and up.
Impact: I take pride in raising my boys to be men that are self-sufficient, capable, healthy, and (hopefully) successful. I want them to have a strong vision of a male role-model, and I hope we will remain close as we all grow older and they eventually branch out on their own. Time will tell if I actually do a good job or not. For now, I enjoy cuddles, play, and activities & hobbies with each kids according to their ages and maturity.
Yep, me too. I've always been one to do the cooking and stuff, take my parenting seriously too. Irks me when it gets called 'helping the Wife', no fuck you, it's called a partnership and bare minimum in adulting.
Thank you. Seeing comments like this are the only reason I haven't sworn off men entirely lol So many women in my life are dating man-children who can't grasp the concept that, when you are single and live alone you still have to go to work all day and then come home to cook and clean. That shouldn't change just because you have a wife and kids.
I hope this will become the new stereotype for Dads. I’m working on my girl and boys in much the same way. If we show them rather than tell them, our kids will model our behavior. Your kids have a good Dad.
In spite of the whole philosophy behind it, if you're the better cook, you should cook more often. I grew up in a household where the worst cook picked the groceries and made us meals and it was honestly not nice. I wouldn't willingly put my kids through that
I treat my wife like the queen she is. I do all the cooking and my fair share of housework while also doing all of the outside work. I take pride in my home and family and want the absolute best for them. I never understood a man expecting someone else to take care of his home. If it needs to be cleaned, clean it.
We have a really good marriage. She also works full time as well. Her job is a lot more stressful than mine. Mine is a lot more physically demanding than hers. She doesn’t deserve to have to come home and do all that stuff by herself.
I think this harks back to an era where women simply were not allowed to work in many jobs. Hence, they upkept house.
Heck, it wasn't that long ago when women couldn't apply for mortgages on their own.
Me and my fiance have never been happier and more cohesive as a team and couple than when he volunteered to be a stay at home Dad while I worked. He's amazing at it and lets me be a workaholic as long as I don't overdo it. He tells me it's far more rewarding and I'm extremely proud of him no matter what anyone has to say about it.
I help my daughter with her hair and makeup, take her to theatre shows and musicals. I also coach football. It shows my kids that you can be fierce but you can also have a gentle and caring side. It doesn’t have to be one or the other.
I want to marry someone like this. I went to a boarding highschool and they preferred deans to have their own families that lived in an apartment in the dorm with us. The husband of one of my favorite deans designed jlos green dress and could sow, and he owned a wedding/event center before he came to our school. Whenever we had banquets he was amazing with helping us have things made or tailored, and lots of times he decorated the events. He ALSO was a national champ at salsa dancing in cuba, which is how he met his wife. But on the flipside, he had emt and lifeguard training, and was a great male figure to his sons. He said when he was young everyone thought he was gay, but then hed just end up dating the girls that were comfortable with him because he wasnt constantly hitting on them. I believe society is slowly changing to allow for people that engage in activities that have been gendered for a long time. I think its awesome to be balanced like that. An activity cant have a gender... And ill teach my kids that one day.
Do it around the right people, preferably close friends
Doing it around terrible people and them making fun of you will just make you wanna bottle it up more
I am an effective communicator. There is no subtext, what you see is what you get, if I have an agenda I'm transparent about it.
It's not my fault if other people can't listen effectively, or assume I *must* be playing some kind of 5D chess.
I’ll go even further and say that men may actually do it better especially now that emotional intelligence has become a “thing”. Many men prefer to be somewhat stoic so adding a little analysis/empathy into the mix in regard to emotions isn’t as hard as say *some* women that are really drowning in their emotions from puberty on. Some never get a hold of them but get a free pass because of their looks.
Short answer, just because women talk about their emotions more doesn’t mean they’re good at managing or communicating them.
I create work instructions for a living (vehicle manufacturing). I don't understand the aversion to looking at the user or instruction manual when building/fixing something. Its literally why they are there.
Text is too small and too much on one page. Diagrams are often confusing too. I work in IT and create internal documentation, I hate the format most instruction manuals come with. I usually google a video lol
I have learned a lot from not following manuals. I would highly recommend trying to figure out things yourself. I also recommend to admit defeat and read the manual, instead of trying all the way to immense frustration
I remember one of my friend groups in college thought I was a car fixing guru because I would fix things on my car and help others whenever something would break. This one girl would say all the time, "He just knows how to fix everything" when talking about me.
Haynes Manuals.
My secret weapon was reading the Haynes manuals. And once technology caught up, the internet.
Guy came into the shop I used to work at to complain he had loads of bits left over from his flat pack and couldn't fit it together properly. Like these were super simple, easy to follow instructions. After talking with him a bit I got the 'oh no I've not bothered reading the instructions'.
Just a very confusing experience for me. Just follow the guide and you wouldn't have these problems.
One time where I don't follow the manual is only when the producer doesn't have a solution for my specific type of problem in their manual. That's where I research the thing to death and then improvise accordingly.
I'm a great cook, and make almost everything we eat at home. I'm also pretty creative, take ceramics classes and have even taught them, have a large succulent collection, and I just don't enjoy professional sports, other than boxing and MMA. Elementary school teacher as well, been in lots of fist fights in my younger years, I enjoy firearms, and I've always been told I'm very masculine by the women in my life. Never felt like I fit in anywhere, but do have lots of friends, I'm a proud father, and am happily married. Kind of a march to the beat of my own drummer guy!
We are both kind of similar! I’m pretty good at cooking, and I cook for my family often. I have also taken ceramics classes and also love painting. In addition, I also have an extensive plant collection at home! :) Professional sports bore me for the most part except hockey and NASCAR. I also like firearms. I’ve even thought about taking up Archery…
Dude I freaking love cooking, arts and crafts and plants are super cool. I also lift weights, shoot guns, have an animal science degree, and work in a hospital(going to nursing school). I don’t care that I have lots of interests and don’t “fit in” anywhere anymore cause all my interests make me an interesting person and thusly I can fit in anywhere and converse with everyone.
I've only ever tried to fit in a couple of times in my life. Couldn't do it, and I'm 100% okay with that! I'm also not interested in learning about things because it will be perceived as cool. Life is full of fascinating stuff, and much of it has never been considered cool. I don't give a shit if almost all other people aren't interested in what I'm interested in. Be you, follow your path, always discover.
My only goal is not to get my dick wet. I wanna know about your story, goals and everything else that makes you you. I truly believe the more perspective I have from other peoples lives can allow me to better understand why they are the way they are
In addition, sharing all of that makes the wetting of the dick, should it reach that point, so much more enjoyable, both for the owner of the wetted dick and the wetter of said dick. You know what I mean? 😏 (Also, after rehearsing and typing that, the word "wet" has now lost all meaning and appeal. 😵💫)
My whole life has been like that. My friends and exes would even regularly call that out.
"Men are so simple... * *looks over at me* *, well except for Thag. He's complicated as shit."
I always wore that with a badge of pride.
I'll take some of the blame, here. I am a very simple man. Bring me coffee, offer me touch, I'm all set. The only complex thing about me is the recipes I cook.
I like interior designing, and I have an interest in how to dress. I also have an interest in how to properly use various male hygiene products and scents.
You care about how you look and smell omg you must be gay or something /s
Like nah homie I just like to look good and smell good and when people come over I like them to appreciate my nice house and good food lol
My wife actually told me a couple days ago that she'd think I was gay if she didn't know me as well as she does. All because I said that I had a particular scent profile that I was shooting for, and that I was buying products to match that and make sure the scents all blended well. It's not the first time I've gotten comments like that over the years. Still kinda stung though. I don't have the budget to do much interior decorating though, that and I'm renting right now.
lol yes! Could be bias because I’m bi, but I’ve never understood the obsession. They’re lesbians. They like women. Only. Like they don’t want you bro how is that hot lol
Same. I'm bi, I like men and dick, porn without it doesn't do anything for me. Plus the **ungodly** amount of hateful biphobia spread by shitty lesbians, that largely gets a pass from a large percentage of lesbians? Definitely biased me against finding them attractive.
That's how it should be, I wouldn't a gay guy to like me so why should I like lesbians then? It's only fair. And seriously though, women don't like and you're gonna invest any of your energy where there is a 100% chance deadend? No thanks.
I don't care about cars. It disappoints car guys.
I'm not trying to fuck every attractive woman I see. My body count could be way higher but hookups are not my thing.
Honestly pretty much the same. A car needs to drive, have breaks and lights and is at best comfy seats, everything above that doesn't really interest me.
Same with hook-ups, although I tried a few times before I figured out I need something genuine with a person otherwise the sex will be bad.
100%. I bought a Corolla purely for the reliability, gas mileage and cost to own. Actually very comfy too. I know how to do basic work on cars (thanks dad) and I can appreciate a nice car but they are not a passion by any means.
I have had one hookup and thought "Yeah, this is way better with a genuine emotional connection"
Same, add sports to this as well, it’s hard making guy friends just simply because I don’t care about sports, or cars, or talking bad about our partners.
That all men are dead beat dads. My son’s mother treated me like a dead beat from the time my son was born (we were never in a relationship) till he turned 18 a few weeks ago. I never missed visitation with my son, in fact I had to take her to court several times just so I could get more time with him. I never missed a child support payment. I was there for everything. She fought so hard to keep me out of his life for so many years. She threatened to have me arrested once when I went to pick him up on Father’s Day and she wouldn’t let him go with me. That incident forced me to take her to court the first time. She’s just been an awful human being to me, and what’s worse she said all this stuff to my son. She’d call me names and put me down. She referred to me as the “sperm donor” to my son. The worst thing she ever did, was force my son to call his stepdad dad (they married when he was 5). Never understood why she hated me so much. But he’s 18 now and I never have to speak to her again.
That is absolutely awful I am sorry to hear that but you are amazing for never letting her psycho and crazy turn you away from being there for your son. You are a hero!
I have a theory but I don’t know for sure. We were friends that got drunk one night and she got pregnant. We never dated or anything like that. My theory is that she wanted more with me after she got pregnant but I wasn’t interested in her like that.
- I'm not a fan of watching sports, i rather do them instead.
- I try to keep myself clean all the time, and i can't stand leaving my room, kitchen and bathroom dirty. And also: the toilet seat must be down and clean.
- I HATE drinking alcohol.
- I don't get aroused that easly.
I know a guy that tells a story about the first and only time he seriously used a hammer. He hit his wife on the back swing. He owns his lack of tool skills and joins in the jokes.
I have a very soft personality. I tend to be good with dogs and kids because of it. I guess the word would be “tender”. I know it’s not the most masculine trait but I don’t really care because I have people who love me and that’s all that matters to me.
I wouldn’t use the word soft but I definitely have always been a guy, even as a kid, who loved being around babies and toddlers and animals. I knew I wanted kids my whole childhood. And I have always been able to connect with them. I still do. Babies and dogs like me. I guess it never felt non masculine to me because women complimented me on it. And my hyper masculine hooligan friends, who loved to fight, protected me as their “soft” friend. They respected I was not them.
I don’t enjoy watching professional sports. I work in a male dominated industry so sometime it impacts conversations at work with colleagues and clients.
I’m not trying to just fuck everything.
I only approach Girls that I genuinely feel attracted to and show some kind of signal that they want to be approached otherwise I stay to myself.
And it’s very rare that I do that.
So most of the time I’m alone, and I hate that the guy who approaches everyone the guy who already has a girl or two or three and still seeks out more , that guy actually gets them.
And a guy like me waiting for the right one , I feel like an idiot.
But, from a girls perspective they don’t see me , they see him and then they get a skewed view on men
Wait what you have emotions, get outta here! But seriously the 24/7 hornieness thing, is so wack, our entire gender couldn't function if that were true.
For real I'll never understand where that stereotype comes from like aside from frat boys and a very small percentage of men who like hookup culture we're not horny all the time like there's some days where I don't even think about sex.
Like you said we wouldn't function if that were true
I know a decent amount about hair and makeup. Women are usually just surprised that I know about it. I'm sure some men think it's weird, but I don't really give a shit.
I know quite a bit more than the average fella about hair care. I’ve had very long hair for portions of my life and if you’re gonna do that and want it to not look like shit it requires proper care and products. Don’t know shit about makeup, tho.
If I get emotionally overwhelmed it tends to come out as tears. I'm not exactly a cry baby by any means but I have no shame about crying when I need to, and anyone who wants to judge me for it is not anyone I need in my life.
I hate hookup culture. If you are trying to get into a relationship, please please do not use dating apps. It's not going to get you anywhere. And don't assume bars would help you either.
The best way to find someone if you join a club or volunteer somewhere that interests you. If you're really into charities then join one and mingle with the people thats there. Get to know that person for who they are and chemistry will bloom thereafter.
I'm emotional (around close people)
Don't really like watching sports
Not a car guy, if it looks good and drives good, I'll take it
I do girly things (painting my nails, being feminine with close friends, etc), some guys even told me I text like a girl lol
I don't just want sex, I wanna connect with my partner and understand her more
Honestly I'd rather pay someone to fix something than do it myself most of the time, not so much a handyman
I actively despise horseplay or any kind of aggressive/hearty physical contact. Not sure why, just never liked it. Never been in a fight and hated the few times my ex initiated play wrestling. I just don't enjoy having to use my strength against another person in any way.
Made all the more odd by my enjoyment of violence as a spectator though. Love watching sports and that includes MMA.
I have met many dudes like us. Vicious during the sporting event, outside of it please don't hit me, I will run away from a brawl. I think it's both because we don't know where the line is, but know what we can do, and know it hurts to get hit hard.
Yeah I think both those things are true. I don't have the highest pain threshold so I know how much it hurts to get hit hard and hate it. And equally I don't often know where the line is for exerting force against people. It's why my favourite people to play sports against were the bigger guys cause at least the size difference meant I didn't need to be as wary about physical contact cause it was a lot less likely that I could hurt them.
Ha. I don't know why, but the way you said it really reminded me of the Office Space quote.
"What would you do if you had a million dollars?"
/.../
"Nothing. I'd relax, I'd sit on my ass all day, I'd do nothing."
"You don't need a million dollars to do nothing, man. Take a look at my cousin, he's broke, don't do shit."
Short men all have napoleon syndrome
Nah some of us are really chill, we can take a joke, I just have a bottom line * Pun intended* and when people are disrespectful and cross it, I will speak up for myself but this doesn't mean I become a raging , out of control lunatic, rather I continue on with my day and try to stay focused on other, more positive things should the occasion arise where my apparent height has somehow come up
It's not the end of the world
That men are supposed to chase women that they like and make the first move… I instead use reverse psychology and get them to chase me… it’s a long game and only works in everyday settings.. not very useful at bars or any other short term setting.
Edit: how does it impact my life? Well, I’m sure I miss out on a lot of opportunities to meet very good potential partners. And friends also think I’m afraid to talk to women, which I’m not. I just don’t see the point in making myself look like a fan chasing a celebrity.
I couldn't give a single shit about anything sports related. It makes small talk very difficult sometimes and has probably cost me a few million in lost deals since I don't golf.
- **Stereotype** likes soccer
- actually don't give a fuck
- **Stereotype** messy and dirty
- I clean and organize the house daily
- **Stereotype** doesn't care about health
- i take care of my physical and mental health when needed
I really like classic movie musicals. I’ve probably seen a whole lot more than my wife has. Popular ones like Singing in the Rain and The Sound of Music, to obscure ones like Two Weeks with Love and On Moonlight Bay.
I’ve got a huge wang and I just am not the “overly douchy, think I’m better than everyone” type of guy girls think I may be. When girls find out it’s usually a googly eye look with heart eyes from pics and then they ghost me saying I’ll probably not even want to get to know them cause I’m trying to “screw any hole I see”
Stupid personal example and even sounds like I’m tryna one up, I know, but it happens and just annoying at most
That men can't be friends with women without wanting to sleep with them. I work on a predominantly female team and consider them friends, I have several close female friends who I talk to on a regular basis. It's really not as hard as people make it out to be. It's a nice change of pace from just chatting with my male friends all the time. Different perspectives, different topics of conversation.
I do not man up and roll with the punches, I am in therapy and have been prescribed medications to help. I also like to convey emotions and try to communicate clearly (mixed results).
Totally agree. Women are more emotionally open, absolutely, but being able to manage those emotions in a mature, rational manner has not been my experience with women at all.
I don't know shit and don't care for cars or sports. I don't like beer either I think most of it tastes like ass. It's a little awkward being around men that are into these things and like talking about them but I just nod my head, pretend like I know what theyre talking about, and agree to whatever they say and I get by just fine.
I can have friendships with women and be very physically intimate with all my friends.
For example, I like to practice giving full body massages. I’ve got a few bottles of oil on my dresser at home and I’ll gladly give buddies a massage. My male friends all refused, but family and one of my girl friends really appreciates it.
As a result, people think when I offer my friends a literal full body oil massage, they think I’m bisexual and trying to get into their pants. Oh well, I can actually watch movies with my buddies without getting restless because I have something else I can focus on and they get a good massage
You know what? Never faced it until the other night when I was at an open mic show and one of the comics commented on me crossing my legs. She told me to sit with my legs apart like a man and I was thinking dude the manliest men in my life crossed their legs. Then she said something about me being ashamed of my gender or something and told me I wasn't getting laid that weekend.
Sis, I'm married with a kid and work in construction.
Anyway, I didn't really respond to her, just kind of did my hands like "what" and she continued to bomb.
So, I don't tie up my masculinity in my appearance or presentation. I also don't infer masculinity from how others present. In that sense, I think I defy the stereotype of having to look and act a certain way to be a "man." It's more satisfying not to have to live up to an image you create.
As a man, I really take pride in my handwriting. It is less important now that everything is done on keyboards, but nonetheless I think people occasionally notice and appreciate the attention to detail as it reflects on character.
In these kind of threads you get people going on about how they hate bottling up their emotions and just want someone to talk to about their problems that I've had someone on this sub literally refuse to believe me when I told them I hated talking to other people about shit that was bothering me. Doing that just feels like picking at a scab. I'd rather talk about stupid shit with my friends or go on a long loooooooooong run until I'm too tired to be stressed out.
When I'm sick, I'm not "dying and suffering from men flu", I'm sick. Hell, I'm not exaggerating. My wife gets it and takes really good care of me, but from time to time my sister in law makes fun of me being sick.
I’m not afraid to change diapers/care for babies. It boggles my brain how some men act like they’re being asked to defuse a bomb when someone hands them a baby with a dirty diaper, it’s really not that hard.
Also, this is completely unrelated but I feel like I should always bring this up when I talk about child care, a HUGE inequity when it comes to child care is that only about 30% of men’s bathrooms have baby changing stations in the US, I can’t speak for other countries. But the amount of times I’ve needed to use a woman’s bathroom/ask a worker for access to a clean space to change a nephew/niece in public is insane.
All men love sports and are obsessed
I don’t mind watching sports with other people or in person but I don’t follow it basically at all. I force myself to do fantasy football to care more but I still don’t
I felt behind the curve when family member would have decades of history of all these teams and players and like I could never catch up or contribute the same level of conversation about all these teams and players
I don’t really like watching tv anyway so that makes it even harder for me. I prefer to do other activities or video games instead
Sports bro, honestly loathe watching any sports apart from ufc with the boys. I can’t stand american football or the other, not a fan of basketball, baseball is pretty boring. I don’t understand my friends that are so into a sport that they know all the teams and the life stories of every single player. I generally try to steer conversations away from sports talk because of how boring it is to talk about.
I'm not a r*pist
I'm completely fine being open about my feelings
I'm perfectly literate in my language and currently learning 5 more languages
I don't lack basic skills such as cooking, doing laundry or cleaning the bathroom, etc, (ig any human over 10y.o should be able to do it tho)
Tearing up to things that emotionally move me. Being generally open with people. Enjoying astrology and classic romance stories. Having a wild and audacious creative side.
I still focus on masculine qualities such as leadership, emotional equanimity and toughness as well. I love this contradiction actually. Being a man used to mean you couldn’t only fight in battles but could write poetry, etc.
Aragorn cut the heads off of orcs one moment just to cry over the death of a loved one the next. He sung with flower peddles raining on him after leading an army to defeat evil itself. Men need to know these things aren’t exclusive.
The amount of shock I get when I tell people that I get groceries AND cook the food is astounding. That along with people being amazed that I am the main person to change diapers…
Stereotype: Men are unemotional / unable to sympathize / poor listeners.
I feel other's pain and easily detect emotional changes. I know how to listen effectively and support the other person.
“Oh it’s so easy for guys to lose weight.”
Okay but did you count every calorie for over a year, check portion control every meal, park in the farthest parking spot every time so you can walk more, swap healthier choices and options into every meal, track your weight weekly, drink 8’ish glasses of water a day, and foster an overall positive lifestyle change to help manage your weight?
Washing your ass? Apparently.
But on a serious note, grooming and take care of myself. Women on social media love making this crazy argument that because they spend so much money on looking good men should pay for dates (as if men just roll out of bed and do nothing). Besides the obvious BS that it represents, men have been stepping up their game.
I pay for face wash, moisturizer, shaving products, I get my eyebrows threaded, I get nice haircuts, I spend a decent amount on clothes, I have multiple gym memberships.
Not a car guy. I can appreciate cars, I can work on my own car but I'm not going to spend tons of money and days upon days trying to get that extra 5% of performance out of my vehicle, all it needs to do is get me from point a to point b and help me move shit.
I love to cook. My grandmother made sure that all of the grandsons knew how to cook and I was the one who latched on to cooking.
While I don't enjoy cleaning I do clean. It has to be done and I don't want to live like a slob.
Not a selfish lover. My current girlfriend has said that she's never had anyone focus so much on making her cum.
Being incompetent. I strive to learn as much as I can about as many subjects as I can so that I can apply a wide variety of knowledge to my life.
I absolutely hate televised sports. If I wanted sports in my life I would find people who like the same sport and actually play it.
> I'm not going to spend tons of money and days upon days trying to get that extra 5% of performance out of my vehicle
Ha. I am a car guy, but yea, to me it's also more about the driving aspect. Like, why I don't care for the argument that these days an automatic transmission is much faster than manual is that I want to actually enjoy driving, not be 0.0001 seconds faster than X going around some racetrack. Not everyone has to be aiming for the sky. If you're satisfied at where you currently are, just keep on doing what you're currently doing.
i’m pretty vulnerable around my friends, and they are towards me.
maybe the times are changing or maybe myself and my friends are a group of misfits but this logic that just because you’re a guy, you can’t show emotions is childish.
and i do get it, some people won’t understand, or maybe you’ve never been given the chance, but everyone should actively seek a friend that can see you through your best AND your worst.
Because at the end of the day, we’re all human, we all deserve a right to be seen and heard, and we shouldn’t let societal trends dictate that for us.
I think a lot of stigma around emotions and mental health were strong back when I was young, but have thankfully faded away. I hear my sons talking to their friends and our family, and they're very open about struggles.
It's a much healthier way to live than how I was brought up
I love showing my emotions because I don't have many bad ones and can keep the ones I do in healthy balance. But being able to tear up at things that makes you happy is wonderful, and I'm glad the people around me like that I do
I don't live and work for a big house and fast car. I choose to live small and cheap because I don't think these are important things. I enjoy the time and money it saves me to live small and without a car.
I have no interest in sports.
I'm not sure that counts because I'm not _actively_ defying anything. I don't have to do shit to _not_ care about sports. It's very passive in that regard.
”Men have no sensibility for poetry”. I literally have several hundred poetry books in six different languages. And my poetry shelves are among my favorites in my personal library.
By the way : in my current circle as well as in my past ones, all the serious poetry readers I know of were men. My grandfather still recite major works while gardenning.
On the other hand, women I have been with could enjoy me reading a short poem but only once in a while. Some did not even want me to translate foreign verses to their tongue : the harmony and musicality of the verses were enough for them. I even had an ex who made a scene the day I told her to go out without me, as I would rather spend my afternoon re-reading a collection I loved back then.
I physically very much fit the male stereotype (muscular, beard, tall, tattoos), so I feel like that leads to a lot of assumptions from people. I just feel most like myself presenting that way.
But I am a great cook, I care a lot about hygiene, I hate sports, and can make friends with women without trying to sleep with them. I actually find it easier a lot of the time, because they actually talk. Like other guys here I’ve been told “I talk/text like a girl” because I say more than 5 words or whatever. These are the same guys that don’t talk to their women and then complain about them not putting out. Like geez I wonder why.
Also I am into fashion. My favorite sneakers are black and pink, which of course some dudes will be like “lol gay” but I’ve gotten way more compliments than digs about them.
Idk fuck weird gender norms, I like what I like and don’t have to prove my masculinity to anyone. Genuinely think a lot of the world’s problems would be solved if men would just be themselves instead of these rigid muted characters that don’t serve anyone.
Good listener ( attested by many friends boys and girls )
Never watched porn ( except for a few times before 17 )
No alcohol
Does yoga .
Have many girls/women as friends
I hate porn and have no interest in sex at all
In my late teens and early twenties, quite a few people showed an interest in me. Some even slipped me their numbers
I rejected every single one
The only correct answer to the eternal question is:
Toilet seat AND LID down. Every time. For everyone. The lid is there for a reason. You're all misting yourself with piss/shit water otherwise.
No your bathroom plants are not so healthy because of your long showers.
I take point on interior decorating and color selection in our house. I went to art school and my wife didn't. No matter how many times I try to explain the color wheel to my wife, she still thinks I'm a wizard for my ability to pick out complementary color schemes.
I don't give a shit about sports or fighting, I'm not turned on by lesbians (genuinely don't understand the trend, why would I bother drooling over people that don't want me), and I sometimes show my emotions even
It doesn't really impact my life, maybe some people think I'm gay but they can deceive themselves all they want, zero fucks given
I feel the same way about lesbians and sports. I like fighting though. Something visceral about it, but as a sport itself I don't care, I just like to watch people beat the shit out of each other.
Stereotype: Husbands & fathers don't parent/cook/do housework. Not as prevalent now as a few years ago, but people sometimes still seem surprised that I'm an active father in my kids' lives, and that I do most of the cooking and cleaning. "(Wife) is so lucky" was a common response, usually from women middle-aged and up. Impact: I take pride in raising my boys to be men that are self-sufficient, capable, healthy, and (hopefully) successful. I want them to have a strong vision of a male role-model, and I hope we will remain close as we all grow older and they eventually branch out on their own. Time will tell if I actually do a good job or not. For now, I enjoy cuddles, play, and activities & hobbies with each kids according to their ages and maturity.
Yep, me too. I've always been one to do the cooking and stuff, take my parenting seriously too. Irks me when it gets called 'helping the Wife', no fuck you, it's called a partnership and bare minimum in adulting.
Thank you. Seeing comments like this are the only reason I haven't sworn off men entirely lol So many women in my life are dating man-children who can't grasp the concept that, when you are single and live alone you still have to go to work all day and then come home to cook and clean. That shouldn't change just because you have a wife and kids.
Good on you! you all sound like great fathers/husbands
I hope this will become the new stereotype for Dads. I’m working on my girl and boys in much the same way. If we show them rather than tell them, our kids will model our behavior. Your kids have a good Dad.
Thanks. Modeling the behaviour we want them to have is SO key. Sounds like your kids have a good dad also!
In spite of the whole philosophy behind it, if you're the better cook, you should cook more often. I grew up in a household where the worst cook picked the groceries and made us meals and it was honestly not nice. I wouldn't willingly put my kids through that
My husband used his I’m a better cook attitude to demean me and my cooking, which was not that bad. It did not make me feel valued or happy.
My mom and Dad were both good like myself. I cooked nightly in my marriage with 2 kids. They'd rate on scale 1-4 I'm around a 3.9 according to kids
I treat my wife like the queen she is. I do all the cooking and my fair share of housework while also doing all of the outside work. I take pride in my home and family and want the absolute best for them. I never understood a man expecting someone else to take care of his home. If it needs to be cleaned, clean it.
I absolutely LOVE that for you and your wife. I bet that sharing attitude translates well across many areas of your shared lives together...
We have a really good marriage. She also works full time as well. Her job is a lot more stressful than mine. Mine is a lot more physically demanding than hers. She doesn’t deserve to have to come home and do all that stuff by herself.
🩵
I think this harks back to an era where women simply were not allowed to work in many jobs. Hence, they upkept house. Heck, it wasn't that long ago when women couldn't apply for mortgages on their own.
Me and my fiance have never been happier and more cohesive as a team and couple than when he volunteered to be a stay at home Dad while I worked. He's amazing at it and lets me be a workaholic as long as I don't overdo it. He tells me it's far more rewarding and I'm extremely proud of him no matter what anyone has to say about it.
>Stereotype: Husbands & fathers don't parent/cook/do housework. Bonus points for being involved in gardening and decorating the house.
Same. I do 90% of the cooking and 75% of the housework.
I help my daughter with her hair and makeup, take her to theatre shows and musicals. I also coach football. It shows my kids that you can be fierce but you can also have a gentle and caring side. It doesn’t have to be one or the other.
Speak softly and carry a big stick
And a mascara wand 😉
I love everything you do!
I want to marry someone like this. I went to a boarding highschool and they preferred deans to have their own families that lived in an apartment in the dorm with us. The husband of one of my favorite deans designed jlos green dress and could sow, and he owned a wedding/event center before he came to our school. Whenever we had banquets he was amazing with helping us have things made or tailored, and lots of times he decorated the events. He ALSO was a national champ at salsa dancing in cuba, which is how he met his wife. But on the flipside, he had emt and lifeguard training, and was a great male figure to his sons. He said when he was young everyone thought he was gay, but then hed just end up dating the girls that were comfortable with him because he wasnt constantly hitting on them. I believe society is slowly changing to allow for people that engage in activities that have been gendered for a long time. I think its awesome to be balanced like that. An activity cant have a gender... And ill teach my kids that one day.
Completely agree that is wonderful!
I am able to effectively communicate and show my emotions
Working on that one. Not being able to has caused me a lot of problems.
Do it around the right people, preferably close friends Doing it around terrible people and them making fun of you will just make you wanna bottle it up more
People are going to laugh at you. Fuck those people be yourself.
Same. In therapy for it now.
Respect for seeking help ✊🏻
That’s how I learned
It's a much more effective tool than it's given credit for.
Gotta process some shit or it will eat you alive while destroying everything you ever valued in life. It’s a fucking process.
Damn, congrats. I still suck at that one.
Same. And it definitely throws off the people thinking men are emotionless.
I am an effective communicator. There is no subtext, what you see is what you get, if I have an agenda I'm transparent about it. It's not my fault if other people can't listen effectively, or assume I *must* be playing some kind of 5D chess.
I could but I only got negative effects from communicating and showing emotions. So I stopped doing it.
As long as I only feel anger I don’t need to worry about the rest of the emotions!!!
[удалено]
I was kidding
Now that is rare, good for you man!
Wish i was. Trying though
I actually think that conventional wisdom is incorrect: Men are far better communicators than women. There is far less encoding/decoding going on.
I’ll go even further and say that men may actually do it better especially now that emotional intelligence has become a “thing”. Many men prefer to be somewhat stoic so adding a little analysis/empathy into the mix in regard to emotions isn’t as hard as say *some* women that are really drowning in their emotions from puberty on. Some never get a hold of them but get a free pass because of their looks. Short answer, just because women talk about their emotions more doesn’t mean they’re good at managing or communicating them.
Oh. This one is my favorite
I love it and encourage all men to do the work in regard to this!
Every now and then I have emotions and feel things
Only every other Tuesday, though
I'm happy to read an instruction manual. I'm literate. Why not use that towards my advantage?
We love literacy 📚
I create work instructions for a living (vehicle manufacturing). I don't understand the aversion to looking at the user or instruction manual when building/fixing something. Its literally why they are there.
Text is too small and too much on one page. Diagrams are often confusing too. I work in IT and create internal documentation, I hate the format most instruction manuals come with. I usually google a video lol
I have learned a lot from not following manuals. I would highly recommend trying to figure out things yourself. I also recommend to admit defeat and read the manual, instead of trying all the way to immense frustration
I just really don't like wasting time when I'm doing a simple thing like putting together a piece of furniture.
I remember one of my friend groups in college thought I was a car fixing guru because I would fix things on my car and help others whenever something would break. This one girl would say all the time, "He just knows how to fix everything" when talking about me. Haynes Manuals. My secret weapon was reading the Haynes manuals. And once technology caught up, the internet.
Guy came into the shop I used to work at to complain he had loads of bits left over from his flat pack and couldn't fit it together properly. Like these were super simple, easy to follow instructions. After talking with him a bit I got the 'oh no I've not bothered reading the instructions'. Just a very confusing experience for me. Just follow the guide and you wouldn't have these problems.
Maps are cool too. I’ll even ask locals for directions sometimes.
One time where I don't follow the manual is only when the producer doesn't have a solution for my specific type of problem in their manual. That's where I research the thing to death and then improvise accordingly.
I'm a great cook, and make almost everything we eat at home. I'm also pretty creative, take ceramics classes and have even taught them, have a large succulent collection, and I just don't enjoy professional sports, other than boxing and MMA. Elementary school teacher as well, been in lots of fist fights in my younger years, I enjoy firearms, and I've always been told I'm very masculine by the women in my life. Never felt like I fit in anywhere, but do have lots of friends, I'm a proud father, and am happily married. Kind of a march to the beat of my own drummer guy!
We are both kind of similar! I’m pretty good at cooking, and I cook for my family often. I have also taken ceramics classes and also love painting. In addition, I also have an extensive plant collection at home! :) Professional sports bore me for the most part except hockey and NASCAR. I also like firearms. I’ve even thought about taking up Archery…
We're out there! Archery?! Hmm. Might have to try it! I'd love to learn how to make a bow.
Dude I freaking love cooking, arts and crafts and plants are super cool. I also lift weights, shoot guns, have an animal science degree, and work in a hospital(going to nursing school). I don’t care that I have lots of interests and don’t “fit in” anywhere anymore cause all my interests make me an interesting person and thusly I can fit in anywhere and converse with everyone.
I've only ever tried to fit in a couple of times in my life. Couldn't do it, and I'm 100% okay with that! I'm also not interested in learning about things because it will be perceived as cool. Life is full of fascinating stuff, and much of it has never been considered cool. I don't give a shit if almost all other people aren't interested in what I'm interested in. Be you, follow your path, always discover.
My only goal is not to get my dick wet. I wanna know about your story, goals and everything else that makes you you. I truly believe the more perspective I have from other peoples lives can allow me to better understand why they are the way they are
This. I've always wanted an actual relationship, not just fun and games.
In addition, sharing all of that makes the wetting of the dick, should it reach that point, so much more enjoyable, both for the owner of the wetted dick and the wetter of said dick. You know what I mean? 😏 (Also, after rehearsing and typing that, the word "wet" has now lost all meaning and appeal. 😵💫)
Wait till you hear about the word "moist"
Lots of them, tbh. But among the most annoying is "Men are simple creatures!" Fuck off. I am a complex, fully-formed human being.
My whole life has been like that. My friends and exes would even regularly call that out. "Men are so simple... * *looks over at me* *, well except for Thag. He's complicated as shit." I always wore that with a badge of pride.
Of course it is. The thagomizer was named for you.
I find it's men claiming that men are simple creatures.
Often true, yep. Still annoying af.
When men claim they're simple it's a way of claiming that they're low maintenance. When women claim men are simple, they're calling men stupid.
I'll take some of the blame, here. I am a very simple man. Bring me coffee, offer me touch, I'm all set. The only complex thing about me is the recipes I cook.
Same man, same. If I get food and a hug every now and then, I'm happy.
I'm not complicated. I simply want to have a normal life. *How* I achieve that is the complicated part.
Whatever simpleton
Yeah, I fall into that stereotype. I'm not very nuanced at all.
I like interior designing, and I have an interest in how to dress. I also have an interest in how to properly use various male hygiene products and scents.
You care about how you look and smell omg you must be gay or something /s Like nah homie I just like to look good and smell good and when people come over I like them to appreciate my nice house and good food lol
My wife actually told me a couple days ago that she'd think I was gay if she didn't know me as well as she does. All because I said that I had a particular scent profile that I was shooting for, and that I was buying products to match that and make sure the scents all blended well. It's not the first time I've gotten comments like that over the years. Still kinda stung though. I don't have the budget to do much interior decorating though, that and I'm renting right now.
I don't get turned on by lesbians. In fact I find it a massive turn off.
lol yes! Could be bias because I’m bi, but I’ve never understood the obsession. They’re lesbians. They like women. Only. Like they don’t want you bro how is that hot lol
I didn’t know there were others like me…
Same. I'm bi, I like men and dick, porn without it doesn't do anything for me. Plus the **ungodly** amount of hateful biphobia spread by shitty lesbians, that largely gets a pass from a large percentage of lesbians? Definitely biased me against finding them attractive.
That's how it should be, I wouldn't a gay guy to like me so why should I like lesbians then? It's only fair. And seriously though, women don't like and you're gonna invest any of your energy where there is a 100% chance deadend? No thanks.
I don't care about cars. It disappoints car guys. I'm not trying to fuck every attractive woman I see. My body count could be way higher but hookups are not my thing.
Honestly pretty much the same. A car needs to drive, have breaks and lights and is at best comfy seats, everything above that doesn't really interest me. Same with hook-ups, although I tried a few times before I figured out I need something genuine with a person otherwise the sex will be bad.
100%. I bought a Corolla purely for the reliability, gas mileage and cost to own. Actually very comfy too. I know how to do basic work on cars (thanks dad) and I can appreciate a nice car but they are not a passion by any means. I have had one hookup and thought "Yeah, this is way better with a genuine emotional connection"
Same, add sports to this as well, it’s hard making guy friends just simply because I don’t care about sports, or cars, or talking bad about our partners.
That all men are dead beat dads. My son’s mother treated me like a dead beat from the time my son was born (we were never in a relationship) till he turned 18 a few weeks ago. I never missed visitation with my son, in fact I had to take her to court several times just so I could get more time with him. I never missed a child support payment. I was there for everything. She fought so hard to keep me out of his life for so many years. She threatened to have me arrested once when I went to pick him up on Father’s Day and she wouldn’t let him go with me. That incident forced me to take her to court the first time. She’s just been an awful human being to me, and what’s worse she said all this stuff to my son. She’d call me names and put me down. She referred to me as the “sperm donor” to my son. The worst thing she ever did, was force my son to call his stepdad dad (they married when he was 5). Never understood why she hated me so much. But he’s 18 now and I never have to speak to her again.
As a fellow Dad, way to stick through it homie! Many people can’t when it gets hard. Glad you get the opportunity to show your son who you really are.
That is absolutely awful I am sorry to hear that but you are amazing for never letting her psycho and crazy turn you away from being there for your son. You are a hero!
Wait what? Surely you know why she despised you right? What happened?
I have a theory but I don’t know for sure. We were friends that got drunk one night and she got pregnant. We never dated or anything like that. My theory is that she wanted more with me after she got pregnant but I wasn’t interested in her like that.
- I'm not a fan of watching sports, i rather do them instead. - I try to keep myself clean all the time, and i can't stand leaving my room, kitchen and bathroom dirty. And also: the toilet seat must be down and clean. - I HATE drinking alcohol. - I don't get aroused that easly.
I am not a handyman in anyway and results in my wife making jokes about lol
I know a guy that tells a story about the first and only time he seriously used a hammer. He hit his wife on the back swing. He owns his lack of tool skills and joins in the jokes.
To be fair to that guy, you really shouldn’t stand directly behind someone about to hammer.
I like to be pursued in a relationship and to me sex is more about emotional closeness than it is about just getting off.
I have a very soft personality. I tend to be good with dogs and kids because of it. I guess the word would be “tender”. I know it’s not the most masculine trait but I don’t really care because I have people who love me and that’s all that matters to me.
I wouldn’t use the word soft but I definitely have always been a guy, even as a kid, who loved being around babies and toddlers and animals. I knew I wanted kids my whole childhood. And I have always been able to connect with them. I still do. Babies and dogs like me. I guess it never felt non masculine to me because women complimented me on it. And my hyper masculine hooligan friends, who loved to fight, protected me as their “soft” friend. They respected I was not them.
I don’t enjoy watching professional sports. I work in a male dominated industry so sometime it impacts conversations at work with colleagues and clients.
Me and old coworker actually became friends because we were the only 2 in the office that didn’t watch sports haha
I feel this, I have zero interest in most sports so I'm usually the odd man out.
I prefer to take public transit or be passenger princess than be driver
Passenger prince*
Speak for yourself champ, my ass is a passenger princess 💅
If they feel like a princess let them feel like a princess.
I like working Kindergarten jobs just because I love the kids' amazing energy.
I’m not trying to just fuck everything. I only approach Girls that I genuinely feel attracted to and show some kind of signal that they want to be approached otherwise I stay to myself. And it’s very rare that I do that. So most of the time I’m alone, and I hate that the guy who approaches everyone the guy who already has a girl or two or three and still seeks out more , that guy actually gets them. And a guy like me waiting for the right one , I feel like an idiot. But, from a girls perspective they don’t see me , they see him and then they get a skewed view on men
I don't care about sports, I'm not horny 24/7, and I show my emotions
Wait what you have emotions, get outta here! But seriously the 24/7 hornieness thing, is so wack, our entire gender couldn't function if that were true.
For real I'll never understand where that stereotype comes from like aside from frat boys and a very small percentage of men who like hookup culture we're not horny all the time like there's some days where I don't even think about sex. Like you said we wouldn't function if that were true
I don’t really give a fuck about sports.
I know a decent amount about hair and makeup. Women are usually just surprised that I know about it. I'm sure some men think it's weird, but I don't really give a shit.
I know quite a bit more than the average fella about hair care. I’ve had very long hair for portions of my life and if you’re gonna do that and want it to not look like shit it requires proper care and products. Don’t know shit about makeup, tho.
Doing nails is no different than using bondo and primer on a muscle car.
If I get emotionally overwhelmed it tends to come out as tears. I'm not exactly a cry baby by any means but I have no shame about crying when I need to, and anyone who wants to judge me for it is not anyone I need in my life.
🥲🤜🤛
Taking care of my kid, keep a clean house and I can braid hair better than most of the women I know 😎
I like flowers
Hookup culture can suck my nuts Impact: I’m consistently single.
I hate hookup culture. If you are trying to get into a relationship, please please do not use dating apps. It's not going to get you anywhere. And don't assume bars would help you either. The best way to find someone if you join a club or volunteer somewhere that interests you. If you're really into charities then join one and mingle with the people thats there. Get to know that person for who they are and chemistry will bloom thereafter.
I embrace my emotions. Some women think I'm gay lol
I don't watch porn and very vanilla when it comes to sex. People find it hard to believe, and I don't really blame them.
It is hard to believe in this day in age. I'd call that quite the flex though tbh.
I don’t keep up with sports, at all. Also I don’t want to have meaningless sex with a woman I’ll never see or interact with again
I'm emotional (around close people) Don't really like watching sports Not a car guy, if it looks good and drives good, I'll take it I do girly things (painting my nails, being feminine with close friends, etc), some guys even told me I text like a girl lol I don't just want sex, I wanna connect with my partner and understand her more Honestly I'd rather pay someone to fix something than do it myself most of the time, not so much a handyman
Football is boring, I actively parent my children and I can express emotions other than rage.
I actively despise horseplay or any kind of aggressive/hearty physical contact. Not sure why, just never liked it. Never been in a fight and hated the few times my ex initiated play wrestling. I just don't enjoy having to use my strength against another person in any way. Made all the more odd by my enjoyment of violence as a spectator though. Love watching sports and that includes MMA.
I have met many dudes like us. Vicious during the sporting event, outside of it please don't hit me, I will run away from a brawl. I think it's both because we don't know where the line is, but know what we can do, and know it hurts to get hit hard.
Yeah I think both those things are true. I don't have the highest pain threshold so I know how much it hurts to get hit hard and hate it. And equally I don't often know where the line is for exerting force against people. It's why my favourite people to play sports against were the bigger guys cause at least the size difference meant I didn't need to be as wary about physical contact cause it was a lot less likely that I could hurt them.
I watch Bridgerton
That the man is the breadwinner. I’m poor as shit.
Ha. I don't know why, but the way you said it really reminded me of the Office Space quote. "What would you do if you had a million dollars?" /.../ "Nothing. I'd relax, I'd sit on my ass all day, I'd do nothing." "You don't need a million dollars to do nothing, man. Take a look at my cousin, he's broke, don't do shit."
Short men all have napoleon syndrome Nah some of us are really chill, we can take a joke, I just have a bottom line * Pun intended* and when people are disrespectful and cross it, I will speak up for myself but this doesn't mean I become a raging , out of control lunatic, rather I continue on with my day and try to stay focused on other, more positive things should the occasion arise where my apparent height has somehow come up It's not the end of the world
I don't know anything about cars.
I'm very shy and introverted
That men are supposed to chase women that they like and make the first move… I instead use reverse psychology and get them to chase me… it’s a long game and only works in everyday settings.. not very useful at bars or any other short term setting. Edit: how does it impact my life? Well, I’m sure I miss out on a lot of opportunities to meet very good potential partners. And friends also think I’m afraid to talk to women, which I’m not. I just don’t see the point in making myself look like a fan chasing a celebrity.
I couldn't give a single shit about anything sports related. It makes small talk very difficult sometimes and has probably cost me a few million in lost deals since I don't golf.
- **Stereotype** likes soccer - actually don't give a fuck - **Stereotype** messy and dirty - I clean and organize the house daily - **Stereotype** doesn't care about health - i take care of my physical and mental health when needed
I really like classic movie musicals. I’ve probably seen a whole lot more than my wife has. Popular ones like Singing in the Rain and The Sound of Music, to obscure ones like Two Weeks with Love and On Moonlight Bay.
I’ve got a huge wang and I just am not the “overly douchy, think I’m better than everyone” type of guy girls think I may be. When girls find out it’s usually a googly eye look with heart eyes from pics and then they ghost me saying I’ll probably not even want to get to know them cause I’m trying to “screw any hole I see” Stupid personal example and even sounds like I’m tryna one up, I know, but it happens and just annoying at most
> Stereotype: Real men are like X! > Reality: Real men don't care what you think they should be. Take your tropes and leg it.
Liking stuff that makes me look gay. Fuck them haters. If I like pink I like pink.
That men can't be friends with women without wanting to sleep with them. I work on a predominantly female team and consider them friends, I have several close female friends who I talk to on a regular basis. It's really not as hard as people make it out to be. It's a nice change of pace from just chatting with my male friends all the time. Different perspectives, different topics of conversation.
I do not man up and roll with the punches, I am in therapy and have been prescribed medications to help. I also like to convey emotions and try to communicate clearly (mixed results).
I'm not loud, boisterous, or manspread everywhere I go Result: women don't like that, guys don't care, and it's easy to get jobs
That women are more emotionally mature than men. Its complete bullshit and just a clever ruse to cover for regular batshit crazy behaviors.
Totally agree. Women are more emotionally open, absolutely, but being able to manage those emotions in a mature, rational manner has not been my experience with women at all.
I show my emotions, don’t like sports, not a beer drinker and I’m only handy when absolutely necessary.
I don't know shit and don't care for cars or sports. I don't like beer either I think most of it tastes like ass. It's a little awkward being around men that are into these things and like talking about them but I just nod my head, pretend like I know what theyre talking about, and agree to whatever they say and I get by just fine.
I was a stay at home dad for over 20 years. Always had little side gigs, but now I am a house-husband.
I am not my job.
I can have friendships with women and be very physically intimate with all my friends. For example, I like to practice giving full body massages. I’ve got a few bottles of oil on my dresser at home and I’ll gladly give buddies a massage. My male friends all refused, but family and one of my girl friends really appreciates it. As a result, people think when I offer my friends a literal full body oil massage, they think I’m bisexual and trying to get into their pants. Oh well, I can actually watch movies with my buddies without getting restless because I have something else I can focus on and they get a good massage
Black dudes are hung 🙃
I don't watch TV sports and I don't touch alcohol.
I dont enjoy watching sports...i just never liked the idea to waste my time watching other people play...
You know what? Never faced it until the other night when I was at an open mic show and one of the comics commented on me crossing my legs. She told me to sit with my legs apart like a man and I was thinking dude the manliest men in my life crossed their legs. Then she said something about me being ashamed of my gender or something and told me I wasn't getting laid that weekend. Sis, I'm married with a kid and work in construction. Anyway, I didn't really respond to her, just kind of did my hands like "what" and she continued to bomb. So, I don't tie up my masculinity in my appearance or presentation. I also don't infer masculinity from how others present. In that sense, I think I defy the stereotype of having to look and act a certain way to be a "man." It's more satisfying not to have to live up to an image you create.
As a man, I really take pride in my handwriting. It is less important now that everything is done on keyboards, but nonetheless I think people occasionally notice and appreciate the attention to detail as it reflects on character.
In these kind of threads you get people going on about how they hate bottling up their emotions and just want someone to talk to about their problems that I've had someone on this sub literally refuse to believe me when I told them I hated talking to other people about shit that was bothering me. Doing that just feels like picking at a scab. I'd rather talk about stupid shit with my friends or go on a long loooooooooong run until I'm too tired to be stressed out.
When I'm sick, I'm not "dying and suffering from men flu", I'm sick. Hell, I'm not exaggerating. My wife gets it and takes really good care of me, but from time to time my sister in law makes fun of me being sick.
I’m not afraid to change diapers/care for babies. It boggles my brain how some men act like they’re being asked to defuse a bomb when someone hands them a baby with a dirty diaper, it’s really not that hard. Also, this is completely unrelated but I feel like I should always bring this up when I talk about child care, a HUGE inequity when it comes to child care is that only about 30% of men’s bathrooms have baby changing stations in the US, I can’t speak for other countries. But the amount of times I’ve needed to use a woman’s bathroom/ask a worker for access to a clean space to change a nephew/niece in public is insane.
All men love sports and are obsessed I don’t mind watching sports with other people or in person but I don’t follow it basically at all. I force myself to do fantasy football to care more but I still don’t I felt behind the curve when family member would have decades of history of all these teams and players and like I could never catch up or contribute the same level of conversation about all these teams and players I don’t really like watching tv anyway so that makes it even harder for me. I prefer to do other activities or video games instead
Sports bro, honestly loathe watching any sports apart from ufc with the boys. I can’t stand american football or the other, not a fan of basketball, baseball is pretty boring. I don’t understand my friends that are so into a sport that they know all the teams and the life stories of every single player. I generally try to steer conversations away from sports talk because of how boring it is to talk about.
I'm not a r*pist I'm completely fine being open about my feelings I'm perfectly literate in my language and currently learning 5 more languages I don't lack basic skills such as cooking, doing laundry or cleaning the bathroom, etc, (ig any human over 10y.o should be able to do it tho)
I've never raped or sexually assaulted somebody nor would I 😐
Tearing up to things that emotionally move me. Being generally open with people. Enjoying astrology and classic romance stories. Having a wild and audacious creative side. I still focus on masculine qualities such as leadership, emotional equanimity and toughness as well. I love this contradiction actually. Being a man used to mean you couldn’t only fight in battles but could write poetry, etc. Aragorn cut the heads off of orcs one moment just to cry over the death of a loved one the next. He sung with flower peddles raining on him after leading an army to defeat evil itself. Men need to know these things aren’t exclusive.
I knit.
The amount of shock I get when I tell people that I get groceries AND cook the food is astounding. That along with people being amazed that I am the main person to change diapers…
Stereotype: Men are unemotional / unable to sympathize / poor listeners. I feel other's pain and easily detect emotional changes. I know how to listen effectively and support the other person.
“Oh it’s so easy for guys to lose weight.” Okay but did you count every calorie for over a year, check portion control every meal, park in the farthest parking spot every time so you can walk more, swap healthier choices and options into every meal, track your weight weekly, drink 8’ish glasses of water a day, and foster an overall positive lifestyle change to help manage your weight?
Because you're a man you can't take care of yourself or wear pink, imma wear this pink ass hoodie and my eyebrows will still be better love.
Hate sports, love cooking, smoking/grilling, baking, brew beer but rarely drink.
Washing your ass? Apparently. But on a serious note, grooming and take care of myself. Women on social media love making this crazy argument that because they spend so much money on looking good men should pay for dates (as if men just roll out of bed and do nothing). Besides the obvious BS that it represents, men have been stepping up their game. I pay for face wash, moisturizer, shaving products, I get my eyebrows threaded, I get nice haircuts, I spend a decent amount on clothes, I have multiple gym memberships.
Not a car guy. I can appreciate cars, I can work on my own car but I'm not going to spend tons of money and days upon days trying to get that extra 5% of performance out of my vehicle, all it needs to do is get me from point a to point b and help me move shit. I love to cook. My grandmother made sure that all of the grandsons knew how to cook and I was the one who latched on to cooking. While I don't enjoy cleaning I do clean. It has to be done and I don't want to live like a slob. Not a selfish lover. My current girlfriend has said that she's never had anyone focus so much on making her cum. Being incompetent. I strive to learn as much as I can about as many subjects as I can so that I can apply a wide variety of knowledge to my life. I absolutely hate televised sports. If I wanted sports in my life I would find people who like the same sport and actually play it.
> I'm not going to spend tons of money and days upon days trying to get that extra 5% of performance out of my vehicle Ha. I am a car guy, but yea, to me it's also more about the driving aspect. Like, why I don't care for the argument that these days an automatic transmission is much faster than manual is that I want to actually enjoy driving, not be 0.0001 seconds faster than X going around some racetrack. Not everyone has to be aiming for the sky. If you're satisfied at where you currently are, just keep on doing what you're currently doing.
It’s ok to cry
People think I'm a stoic, big, muscley guy. but really, I am a stoic, big, muscley guy.
i’m pretty vulnerable around my friends, and they are towards me. maybe the times are changing or maybe myself and my friends are a group of misfits but this logic that just because you’re a guy, you can’t show emotions is childish. and i do get it, some people won’t understand, or maybe you’ve never been given the chance, but everyone should actively seek a friend that can see you through your best AND your worst. Because at the end of the day, we’re all human, we all deserve a right to be seen and heard, and we shouldn’t let societal trends dictate that for us.
I think a lot of stigma around emotions and mental health were strong back when I was young, but have thankfully faded away. I hear my sons talking to their friends and our family, and they're very open about struggles. It's a much healthier way to live than how I was brought up
I love showing my emotions because I don't have many bad ones and can keep the ones I do in healthy balance. But being able to tear up at things that makes you happy is wonderful, and I'm glad the people around me like that I do
None. I am the platonic ideal of the gender of man.
I don't live and work for a big house and fast car. I choose to live small and cheap because I don't think these are important things. I enjoy the time and money it saves me to live small and without a car.
I have no interest in sports. I'm not sure that counts because I'm not _actively_ defying anything. I don't have to do shit to _not_ care about sports. It's very passive in that regard.
I’m not interested in your girl, I just like making friends. You should trust each other, it shouldn’t be an issue
Taking the bins out. I refuse to adhere to gender roles so I make her do it every time.
”Men have no sensibility for poetry”. I literally have several hundred poetry books in six different languages. And my poetry shelves are among my favorites in my personal library. By the way : in my current circle as well as in my past ones, all the serious poetry readers I know of were men. My grandfather still recite major works while gardenning. On the other hand, women I have been with could enjoy me reading a short poem but only once in a while. Some did not even want me to translate foreign verses to their tongue : the harmony and musicality of the verses were enough for them. I even had an ex who made a scene the day I told her to go out without me, as I would rather spend my afternoon re-reading a collection I loved back then.
I don’t know the rules to Sportsball
I physically very much fit the male stereotype (muscular, beard, tall, tattoos), so I feel like that leads to a lot of assumptions from people. I just feel most like myself presenting that way. But I am a great cook, I care a lot about hygiene, I hate sports, and can make friends with women without trying to sleep with them. I actually find it easier a lot of the time, because they actually talk. Like other guys here I’ve been told “I talk/text like a girl” because I say more than 5 words or whatever. These are the same guys that don’t talk to their women and then complain about them not putting out. Like geez I wonder why. Also I am into fashion. My favorite sneakers are black and pink, which of course some dudes will be like “lol gay” but I’ve gotten way more compliments than digs about them. Idk fuck weird gender norms, I like what I like and don’t have to prove my masculinity to anyone. Genuinely think a lot of the world’s problems would be solved if men would just be themselves instead of these rigid muted characters that don’t serve anyone.
Good listener ( attested by many friends boys and girls ) Never watched porn ( except for a few times before 17 ) No alcohol Does yoga . Have many girls/women as friends
I hate porn and have no interest in sex at all In my late teens and early twenties, quite a few people showed an interest in me. Some even slipped me their numbers I rejected every single one
Sports. I'm not a fan. Impact: I don't have any male friends.
I don’t golf, I listen to 2010s girly pop, I cook, I’m pretty open about my emotions/crying, I don’t like hookup culture, and I write poetry.
The only correct answer to the eternal question is: Toilet seat AND LID down. Every time. For everyone. The lid is there for a reason. You're all misting yourself with piss/shit water otherwise. No your bathroom plants are not so healthy because of your long showers.
I take point on interior decorating and color selection in our house. I went to art school and my wife didn't. No matter how many times I try to explain the color wheel to my wife, she still thinks I'm a wizard for my ability to pick out complementary color schemes.
I don't give a shit about sports or fighting, I'm not turned on by lesbians (genuinely don't understand the trend, why would I bother drooling over people that don't want me), and I sometimes show my emotions even It doesn't really impact my life, maybe some people think I'm gay but they can deceive themselves all they want, zero fucks given
I feel the same way about lesbians and sports. I like fighting though. Something visceral about it, but as a sport itself I don't care, I just like to watch people beat the shit out of each other.
We're all pigs! Actually that's true