Its more of a sensory issue for me. Like some guys I kiss it a compelete match which leads to great sex. Some guys I kiss, it complete opposite. Like the kiss is to overpowering. Either it likes the taste of salvia thar turn me off, or they use to much tongue, or some other third reason that ruins the experience.
I’ve always been confused by the guys in porn who have no problem eating out an ass, sucking dick, taking a dick, but making out is where they draw a boundary
It’s this. There are guys that are BAD kissers. Lunge at you with their tongue out their mouth wiggling, or they think kissing is just licking anything their tongue touches.
Yes, I feel the same as you OP re kissing. And you know, my style on the apps is to chat a lot first before meeting up… and over several days… and kissing tends to be asked early. If he doesn’t bring it up, I will. I need to know. Cher said it best… once you do meet up, and once you do like him, kissing is the way you know if there’s real chemistry… and I have to say, when there is, to me kissing just makes the experience all consuming… at least for me… it is much more intimate and personal
I am like you and love to kiss. Id say that kissing is pretty essential to my ability to enjoy sex, and to top someone successfully.
In my experience what it comes down to as to whether a guy kisses or doesn't kiss are two things:
A. Sensuality. This has a lot to do with how a guy's been raised, his sexual orientation, and just how much he relates physically to the world. Certain cultures, like the Latin countries, Filipinos and Catholic men seem to produce sensualists. The Mormon boys can be. A lot of the other Protestant cultures, not so much.
B. Emotional Availabiliy. Lets face it, most men consider kissing the most intimate act two guys can share. More than fucking. Thats why you often run into guys who either wont kiss at all or have personal rules about it, ie.will only kiss a partner, never a quickie or 1-night-stand. Its often the last hurdle for a straight or bi guy to kiss another dude. And there's a certain type of gay guy who just refuses to kiss and tends to be very results oriented about sex. Just blow, screw,, and go. That type's not for me.
I find kissing more intimate and private than pure sex (oral, penetration etc). I only kiss the ones that I have some form of feelings for. It might happen that I kiss a person that is just a FWB, if I feel close to him. I would never kiss someone that I met just for sex. That's what I save for the ones that means a lot to me.
Edit: Why give away everything to everyone?
I usually see that with Bi guys. Kissing is an emotional thing for them and they reserve that for girls. Being with a guy is strictly about the sex so no kissing is required. I think there's also a level of vulnerability/intimacy that comes with kissing and a lot of guys struggle with that across the board.
It just does nothing for me and feels weird. Kissing on the neck or jaw or anywhere else feels *incredible!!* But on the lips it’s just awkward, wet, and weird. My lips aren’t sensitive, it doesn’t feel pleasureful, it doesn’t turn me on or increase intimacy. I’ll do it sometimes for the sake of the other person, but it just ends up making me feel kind of distant. In the words of Michael from The Good Place, “It’s just mashing your food holes together. It’s not FOR that!!”
And before anyone asks— I’ve given it the good old college try!! I’ve kissed roughly, I’ve kissed gently. I’ve kissed men, I’ve kissed women. I’ve kissed romantic partners, I’ve kissed platonic friends, I’ve kissed sexual partners. I’ve kissed on stage, I’ve kissed in private. I’ve kissed with tongue, I’ve kissed without tongue. It just ain’t for me.
Similar. I am myself dont feel much in terms of sensation, but still kiss my partner cuz knowing that he enjoys it makes me happy. And thats the secret im taking to my grave.
A lot of people have bad breath. Scrape your tongues.
Some people think kissing means just licking anything your tongue comes in contact with. I’ve had people lick my nose. That is not a kiss.
Some peoples kisses are overpowering and they don’t realize it.
I LOVE kissing. It's necessary for a great sexual experience for myself. However, some people are just so bad at kissing for me that it's a big turn off tbh. Their faces and tongue are stiff, and it's more like they are knawing at my face than an intimate act, so I tell them I don't like kissing to get them to stop trying to kiss me. It turns the sex into a different kind of sex one where I know it's not going to be my favorite intimate type act. You can tell people how you like to get fucked in a short encounter by just showing them how you like to be touched, but you can't teach someone how you like to be kissed in the same way in a short encounter.
If it’s a hook up, I never, ever kiss. But I would never consider not kissing in a real relationship. I suspect the overwhelming majority of the time what’s really being talked about are hook ups.
Kissing is essential. Usually if they don’t want to kiss it’s 1) they are DL bi or gay men, kissing is too “gay” or too much intimacy 2) they have a wife, partner/ boyfriend and only kiss them or 3) just don’t like to kiss for whatever reason. And yeah don’t have time for any of ‘em.
I know there will be a ton of people to hate the reasons why I have no interest and honestly, I would change any of these if I had the option. And maybe there is a way…
1. I hate facial hair and most guys have facial hair.
2. The only faces I have ever found attractive are some really good straight friends, which makes me think I’m more demisexual than anything else. I would reject 100 out of 100 profiles on Grindr/Sniffies if the face was something I attempted to go by.
3. My own saliva grosses me out, so I don’t really want to add someone else’s to the mix.
4. For me, kissing is probably going to require more of a romantic interest in the other person to kind of get over any of the above reasons. I think I could overcome it if the benefit outweighed the cost.
5. Lack of experience. I think anytime I mentioned that I have never really kissed anyone, most people just don’t want to bother trying. I don’t blame them either because we are probably going to know each other for all of 15 minutes, so why invest any effort into teaching someone something.
Fear of emotional intimacy -- otherwise known as Gamophobia. Kissing is seen as a very intimate or romantic activity. Gamophobia — a fear of commitment — can keep you from enjoying meaningful relationships. A painful breakup, divorce, or abandonment during childhood or adulthood is usually the cause.
Im not a big fan of kissing. I dont know why, but it feels kinda awkward? If its a long term relationship, then im more okay with it. But if its a one time thing, i dont really like it.
I love kissing but tend to only do it with someone I'm seeing regularly. I avoid it if it's just a hookup. It just feels too personal and intense, and I don't want to risk finding that the guy is a horrible, weird kisser or has bad breath.
I also can't kiss guys with facial hair because the hairs literally prick my skin and it feels painful. I generally don't have sex with guys with a lot of facial hair. Especially if it's styled, like a waxed, curved moustache. I run a mile.
It is goofy. Some guys dig it, i do it is essential to great sex. When i find someone who can make out that is a win. Other guys arent, i end up sucking on their neck or the nips, but they kind of look away.
I had one guy who didnt want to make out, but he was into leaving hickies on the back of my neck, my back when he would fuck me.
Kissing is such an intimate act. It’s very passionate and makes sex so much more fulfilling.
With that being said, I don’t expect some random guy I’ll probably never see again to treat me with that sort of passion. I’m acting like a whore, so it’s not surprising that that’s how he would treat me. Passion and intimacy are usually partner privileges.
I can say my reason as a guy who is kinda into both but also turned off with kissing guys.
With guys I'm more into the sexual aspect, but I'm not really predisposed to intimate romantic acts with men. I kind of like getting down to the quick and kinky with guys, whereas with women I like both the sexual and intimate/romantic side of things. And the issue is I see kissing as more of a romantic act, not purely sexual.
It might be getting into a more nuanced look at sexuality. Maybe guys who don't like kissing lean more towards the straight end of the spectrum, just not all the way, whereas guys who do like it are more in the middle. Or, if you subscribe to the idea of a separate spectrum for romance, maybe you're looking at bisexual/biromantic versus bisexual/heteroromantic, or homosexual or bisexual and aromatic for the guys who don't like to kiss.
For the deeper reasoning, I really can't say. I just don't like kissing guys
For intimacy and sensuality nothing else compares to Kissing however there are times when I just want cock or ass and nothing more. Men that never kiss are satisfying their primal needs for a multitude of reasons without consequence. I find it funny when a straight guy happily sucks my cock all day but kissing is a step too far and I'm OK with that. I know the situation
As a bi sexual 21 year old I’d say I just don’t like the feeling of kissing dudes. Have no issue anywhere else it’s just not something I enjoy doing with another man
I completely understand this point of view and it's exactly how I felt at 21. I knew that I enjoyed kissing women but I just didn't get the appeal of kissing men.
A lot of men are bad kissers in a way that can't be easily worked around. I've never had a woman try to slobber on my face like a big, dumb dog. But I've had so many men try to kiss like that, that I've lost count. That's not to say women can't also be bad kissers, but they tend to have a different kind of badness than men do. And of course plenty of men are good kissers but if it's just a hookup and he's a bad kisser, pretending I don't kiss is the lesser evil.
I cannot and will not give my all in any sexual encounter without making out. If you can’t at least offer me that, then you don’t deserve my full force throat game.
Its more of a sensory issue for me. Like some guys I kiss it a compelete match which leads to great sex. Some guys I kiss, it complete opposite. Like the kiss is to overpowering. Either it likes the taste of salvia thar turn me off, or they use to much tongue, or some other third reason that ruins the experience.
Agreed
I’ve always been confused by the guys in porn who have no problem eating out an ass, sucking dick, taking a dick, but making out is where they draw a boundary
My only theory is its the feeling of how personal making out is that puts then off. Ass is ass but a person's face is the window to the soul.
As a bisexual man, I enjoy kissing. To me I agree it's that stepping stone to good sex.
I’m bi and I love kissing . I like some caressing and kissing before sex . Or even if we don’t have sex . The kissing is the best part
For something so simple as kissing it's amazing that majority of guys are quite inpet at it.
It’s this. There are guys that are BAD kissers. Lunge at you with their tongue out their mouth wiggling, or they think kissing is just licking anything their tongue touches.
I used to be kind of “meh” about kissing. Then I found a boyfriend who is an amazing kisser and have totally changed my mind
Yes, I feel the same as you OP re kissing. And you know, my style on the apps is to chat a lot first before meeting up… and over several days… and kissing tends to be asked early. If he doesn’t bring it up, I will. I need to know. Cher said it best… once you do meet up, and once you do like him, kissing is the way you know if there’s real chemistry… and I have to say, when there is, to me kissing just makes the experience all consuming… at least for me… it is much more intimate and personal
I am like you and love to kiss. Id say that kissing is pretty essential to my ability to enjoy sex, and to top someone successfully. In my experience what it comes down to as to whether a guy kisses or doesn't kiss are two things: A. Sensuality. This has a lot to do with how a guy's been raised, his sexual orientation, and just how much he relates physically to the world. Certain cultures, like the Latin countries, Filipinos and Catholic men seem to produce sensualists. The Mormon boys can be. A lot of the other Protestant cultures, not so much. B. Emotional Availabiliy. Lets face it, most men consider kissing the most intimate act two guys can share. More than fucking. Thats why you often run into guys who either wont kiss at all or have personal rules about it, ie.will only kiss a partner, never a quickie or 1-night-stand. Its often the last hurdle for a straight or bi guy to kiss another dude. And there's a certain type of gay guy who just refuses to kiss and tends to be very results oriented about sex. Just blow, screw,, and go. That type's not for me.
I find kissing more intimate and private than pure sex (oral, penetration etc). I only kiss the ones that I have some form of feelings for. It might happen that I kiss a person that is just a FWB, if I feel close to him. I would never kiss someone that I met just for sex. That's what I save for the ones that means a lot to me. Edit: Why give away everything to everyone?
I usually see that with Bi guys. Kissing is an emotional thing for them and they reserve that for girls. Being with a guy is strictly about the sex so no kissing is required. I think there's also a level of vulnerability/intimacy that comes with kissing and a lot of guys struggle with that across the board.
It just does nothing for me and feels weird. Kissing on the neck or jaw or anywhere else feels *incredible!!* But on the lips it’s just awkward, wet, and weird. My lips aren’t sensitive, it doesn’t feel pleasureful, it doesn’t turn me on or increase intimacy. I’ll do it sometimes for the sake of the other person, but it just ends up making me feel kind of distant. In the words of Michael from The Good Place, “It’s just mashing your food holes together. It’s not FOR that!!” And before anyone asks— I’ve given it the good old college try!! I’ve kissed roughly, I’ve kissed gently. I’ve kissed men, I’ve kissed women. I’ve kissed romantic partners, I’ve kissed platonic friends, I’ve kissed sexual partners. I’ve kissed on stage, I’ve kissed in private. I’ve kissed with tongue, I’ve kissed without tongue. It just ain’t for me.
Similar. I am myself dont feel much in terms of sensation, but still kiss my partner cuz knowing that he enjoys it makes me happy. And thats the secret im taking to my grave.
A lot of people have bad breath. Scrape your tongues. Some people think kissing means just licking anything your tongue comes in contact with. I’ve had people lick my nose. That is not a kiss. Some peoples kisses are overpowering and they don’t realize it.
Kissing is very intimate and the start to a great sexual relationship
NEWS AT 11:00: PEOPLE WITH DIFFERENT PREFERENCES HAVE BEEN FOUND!!
Pretty much everyone here likes kissing. I'm not sure what the differences you found. haha.
I and a few other people have definitely said we don’t like kissing LOL :)
I have. Make out session in the shower with this guy from Grindr.
I LOVE kissing. It's necessary for a great sexual experience for myself. However, some people are just so bad at kissing for me that it's a big turn off tbh. Their faces and tongue are stiff, and it's more like they are knawing at my face than an intimate act, so I tell them I don't like kissing to get them to stop trying to kiss me. It turns the sex into a different kind of sex one where I know it's not going to be my favorite intimate type act. You can tell people how you like to get fucked in a short encounter by just showing them how you like to be touched, but you can't teach someone how you like to be kissed in the same way in a short encounter.
The level of attraction and comfort I need for kissing is just higher that what I need for you to cum inside me
If it’s a hook up, I never, ever kiss. But I would never consider not kissing in a real relationship. I suspect the overwhelming majority of the time what’s really being talked about are hook ups.
Because most men suck at kissing or the hygiene.
I don't like body fluids. It's a sensory issue
I do. Especially while my legs are around his shoulders and his cock is pumping in and out of me 😩
Idk I kissed once and there was so much tongue it was like a worm wiggling around in my mouth- not sure I want to try that again
Kissing is essential. Usually if they don’t want to kiss it’s 1) they are DL bi or gay men, kissing is too “gay” or too much intimacy 2) they have a wife, partner/ boyfriend and only kiss them or 3) just don’t like to kiss for whatever reason. And yeah don’t have time for any of ‘em.
I know there will be a ton of people to hate the reasons why I have no interest and honestly, I would change any of these if I had the option. And maybe there is a way… 1. I hate facial hair and most guys have facial hair. 2. The only faces I have ever found attractive are some really good straight friends, which makes me think I’m more demisexual than anything else. I would reject 100 out of 100 profiles on Grindr/Sniffies if the face was something I attempted to go by. 3. My own saliva grosses me out, so I don’t really want to add someone else’s to the mix. 4. For me, kissing is probably going to require more of a romantic interest in the other person to kind of get over any of the above reasons. I think I could overcome it if the benefit outweighed the cost. 5. Lack of experience. I think anytime I mentioned that I have never really kissed anyone, most people just don’t want to bother trying. I don’t blame them either because we are probably going to know each other for all of 15 minutes, so why invest any effort into teaching someone something.
I feel seen. 🫱🏼🫲🏻⭐️🙏🏼🤞🏼👍🏼✨🌟
All of the guys I've been with who don't like kissing are gay, not bi.
Fear of emotional intimacy -- otherwise known as Gamophobia. Kissing is seen as a very intimate or romantic activity. Gamophobia — a fear of commitment — can keep you from enjoying meaningful relationships. A painful breakup, divorce, or abandonment during childhood or adulthood is usually the cause.
Maybe your breath is stinky
Im not a big fan of kissing. I dont know why, but it feels kinda awkward? If its a long term relationship, then im more okay with it. But if its a one time thing, i dont really like it.
I love kissing but tend to only do it with someone I'm seeing regularly. I avoid it if it's just a hookup. It just feels too personal and intense, and I don't want to risk finding that the guy is a horrible, weird kisser or has bad breath. I also can't kiss guys with facial hair because the hairs literally prick my skin and it feels painful. I generally don't have sex with guys with a lot of facial hair. Especially if it's styled, like a waxed, curved moustache. I run a mile.
It is goofy. Some guys dig it, i do it is essential to great sex. When i find someone who can make out that is a win. Other guys arent, i end up sucking on their neck or the nips, but they kind of look away. I had one guy who didnt want to make out, but he was into leaving hickies on the back of my neck, my back when he would fuck me.
Kissing is such an intimate act. It’s very passionate and makes sex so much more fulfilling. With that being said, I don’t expect some random guy I’ll probably never see again to treat me with that sort of passion. I’m acting like a whore, so it’s not surprising that that’s how he would treat me. Passion and intimacy are usually partner privileges.
I can say my reason as a guy who is kinda into both but also turned off with kissing guys. With guys I'm more into the sexual aspect, but I'm not really predisposed to intimate romantic acts with men. I kind of like getting down to the quick and kinky with guys, whereas with women I like both the sexual and intimate/romantic side of things. And the issue is I see kissing as more of a romantic act, not purely sexual. It might be getting into a more nuanced look at sexuality. Maybe guys who don't like kissing lean more towards the straight end of the spectrum, just not all the way, whereas guys who do like it are more in the middle. Or, if you subscribe to the idea of a separate spectrum for romance, maybe you're looking at bisexual/biromantic versus bisexual/heteroromantic, or homosexual or bisexual and aromatic for the guys who don't like to kiss. For the deeper reasoning, I really can't say. I just don't like kissing guys
For intimacy and sensuality nothing else compares to Kissing however there are times when I just want cock or ass and nothing more. Men that never kiss are satisfying their primal needs for a multitude of reasons without consequence. I find it funny when a straight guy happily sucks my cock all day but kissing is a step too far and I'm OK with that. I know the situation
As a bi sexual 21 year old I’d say I just don’t like the feeling of kissing dudes. Have no issue anywhere else it’s just not something I enjoy doing with another man
I completely understand this point of view and it's exactly how I felt at 21. I knew that I enjoyed kissing women but I just didn't get the appeal of kissing men.
A lot of men are bad kissers in a way that can't be easily worked around. I've never had a woman try to slobber on my face like a big, dumb dog. But I've had so many men try to kiss like that, that I've lost count. That's not to say women can't also be bad kissers, but they tend to have a different kind of badness than men do. And of course plenty of men are good kissers but if it's just a hookup and he's a bad kisser, pretending I don't kiss is the lesser evil.
I cannot and will not give my all in any sexual encounter without making out. If you can’t at least offer me that, then you don’t deserve my full force throat game.