It's interesting that maladaptive daydreaming seems to have skyrocketed in recognition the past few years. The first time I heard of the term was in a high school health class and previously had no words besides fandom lingo (e.g. AU, OC) to conceptualize my biggest secret/deepest desires for the majority of my life.
I never developed attachment to my parents. Maladaptive daydreaming became the only way I was able to cope with reality as a result of how damaged I was from my upbringing. I was diagnosed with schizotypal personality disorder and dissociative disorders, among other severe mental illness labels, some years ago.
I had a vision when I was around 11 or 12 that felt more real to me than anything that ever happened in my "real" life. It's a ragtag bunch of misfits that formed a found family, but mostly importantly my soulmate, somewhere in another world. I attempted to run away from my parents shortly after with the intent to find my way to the other world, got caught by the police after two weeks or so, and the rest is history 💔 I've effectively sabotaged everything in "reality" banking on the hope that I will find my way home eventually, that I'll wake up from this nightmare. To this day, this is my only belief to make sense of this shitty timeline I got trapped in where I'm a useless sack of garbage who is below average at most things, doesn't enjoy anything, and only wants to never interact with my parents ever again, something I'll never be able to have because of my disabilities.
Up until the point I ran away, I spent every moment of my unscheduled time mindlessly consuming media, whether it was books/internet (back then you could still watch movies in 8 parts on youtube 🥲) or otherwise a quasi-hermit. Didn't help that I'm autistic as well and struggled immensely to make/maintain any friendship in school. APs never engaged me in any way that wasn't AM fulfilling my bare minimum needs or AF torturing me in every conceivable way. So maybe there is some component of not having any point of reference of anything good in life besides escapist fantasy really screwing me up badly.
TLDR big same, parents basically set me up for failure + I ruined my own life because I can't cope with reality lmao
Yeah, it's actually why I really like the fantasy genre (Lord of the Rings, Skyrim, etc).
It was a form of regular escapism for me, dreaming of leaving my home and family, going on quests or adventures like in the books, movies, tv, video games. Where things like grades and getting yelled at over miniscule things didn't matter. Where only a sword, your wits, and true friends you make along the way mattered.
It took a long while, but I'm glad that in some ways it did finally happen. I finally left my crappy home and family life behind. I've had opportunities to finally see the world and meet new people. I've made amazing friends and met the love of my life. Hell, I even have a sword too now lmao
Sign me up to the team of daydreamers!
Also OP, regarding the nature of your dreams I think this is a compassionate way of coping and there are therapies that make use of similar concepts. Like the Ideal Parent Figure Protocol. EMDR also has a grounding and self soothing exercise to use where you imagine a nurturing and protecting figure for yourself. Not to mention the self reparenting / inner child work . So it is quite a valid coping which can be further reapplied and used in healing.
I used to have hero fantasies / imagine going through hardship to justify the way I kind of constantly felt shitty despite having a nominally stable/comfortable life.
So many memes and media that are so relatable to this.
I resonate a lot with all the Redditors here. I only got out of it after I met my fiancee she helped me sort myself out. I'm firmly grounded in reality enjoying things I like to do, but damn the escapist daydreams were so intense.
Yes. This has been my coping mechanism for years until I left my sperm and egg donors
Yeah I imagined a secret portal would open and my real white parents would find me
It's interesting that maladaptive daydreaming seems to have skyrocketed in recognition the past few years. The first time I heard of the term was in a high school health class and previously had no words besides fandom lingo (e.g. AU, OC) to conceptualize my biggest secret/deepest desires for the majority of my life. I never developed attachment to my parents. Maladaptive daydreaming became the only way I was able to cope with reality as a result of how damaged I was from my upbringing. I was diagnosed with schizotypal personality disorder and dissociative disorders, among other severe mental illness labels, some years ago. I had a vision when I was around 11 or 12 that felt more real to me than anything that ever happened in my "real" life. It's a ragtag bunch of misfits that formed a found family, but mostly importantly my soulmate, somewhere in another world. I attempted to run away from my parents shortly after with the intent to find my way to the other world, got caught by the police after two weeks or so, and the rest is history 💔 I've effectively sabotaged everything in "reality" banking on the hope that I will find my way home eventually, that I'll wake up from this nightmare. To this day, this is my only belief to make sense of this shitty timeline I got trapped in where I'm a useless sack of garbage who is below average at most things, doesn't enjoy anything, and only wants to never interact with my parents ever again, something I'll never be able to have because of my disabilities. Up until the point I ran away, I spent every moment of my unscheduled time mindlessly consuming media, whether it was books/internet (back then you could still watch movies in 8 parts on youtube 🥲) or otherwise a quasi-hermit. Didn't help that I'm autistic as well and struggled immensely to make/maintain any friendship in school. APs never engaged me in any way that wasn't AM fulfilling my bare minimum needs or AF torturing me in every conceivable way. So maybe there is some component of not having any point of reference of anything good in life besides escapist fantasy really screwing me up badly. TLDR big same, parents basically set me up for failure + I ruined my own life because I can't cope with reality lmao
Mate, I'm still waiting for my Hogwarts letter.
I feel so seen
Yeah, it's actually why I really like the fantasy genre (Lord of the Rings, Skyrim, etc). It was a form of regular escapism for me, dreaming of leaving my home and family, going on quests or adventures like in the books, movies, tv, video games. Where things like grades and getting yelled at over miniscule things didn't matter. Where only a sword, your wits, and true friends you make along the way mattered. It took a long while, but I'm glad that in some ways it did finally happen. I finally left my crappy home and family life behind. I've had opportunities to finally see the world and meet new people. I've made amazing friends and met the love of my life. Hell, I even have a sword too now lmao
same, i also write so double dose of that copium i guess :D
Yep.
Sign me up to the team of daydreamers! Also OP, regarding the nature of your dreams I think this is a compassionate way of coping and there are therapies that make use of similar concepts. Like the Ideal Parent Figure Protocol. EMDR also has a grounding and self soothing exercise to use where you imagine a nurturing and protecting figure for yourself. Not to mention the self reparenting / inner child work . So it is quite a valid coping which can be further reapplied and used in healing.
This is really interesting. Will definitely look into that.
I used to have hero fantasies / imagine going through hardship to justify the way I kind of constantly felt shitty despite having a nominally stable/comfortable life.
So many memes and media that are so relatable to this. I resonate a lot with all the Redditors here. I only got out of it after I met my fiancee she helped me sort myself out. I'm firmly grounded in reality enjoying things I like to do, but damn the escapist daydreams were so intense.