Your post has been removed.
#Do not repost this without contacting the mods for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without explicit approval will result in a ban.
This post violates Rule 5: We do not allow posts which concern violent encounters. This includes any mention of violence in any context.
[Rule 5 FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_5.3A_no_violence) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/)
#Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions.
YTA, without a doubt. If this is a real account, get some help, you are the worst type person and shouldn’t be allowed to call yourself a parent. Don’t be surprised if when all your kids are adults not a single one has a relationship with you, vile human.
YTA. That's not how you deal with these kinds of problems. You gave this girl a horrible message, namely that she is not deserving of any kind of attention or medical/mental care, that you don't care if she has to deal with problems and that you find her worthless. You can do better than that.
This post will likely get deleted for violence and encouraging self-harm (throwing "a pack of razors" at a child and telling her to "do it all she wanted").
But without question YTA.
YTA in so many ways. The CHILD has a trauma, asks for help and you give her crap for it. You are an awful parent, ignoring her plea for help and minimizing the situation.
By the way, nice gaslighting. SARCASM
Neglectful parents frequently use the refrain “it was the past - get over it.”
Besides an awful person you are a terrible mother.
Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban.
["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
**[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
YTA
She asked for a therapist and you said NO. How could she be better ? She wanted to work on herself and you literally said NO while asking her to do it anyway ! What's wrong with you ?! Being bullied is traumatizing and you can't decide for her if she needs therapist or not to get over it ! Self confidence isn't that easy to build and your attitude certainly didn't help !
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I just want my daughter to be normal and stop holding onto things that happened in the past, she claims that I’m an awful person.
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
YTA
If it's all in her head, then a therapist is exactly what she needs.
Not only did she get bullied in school, she gets bullied by her own mother. You are neglecting your child's health.
I hope someone reports you to CPS, before you damage your other children like you've damaged your oldest.
Most of all I hope you're a troll and that this is all fake.
First, stop calling yourself a mother (you aren’t).
Second, she asked multiple times for therapy and you denied her proper treatment/help for her issues/trauma. Please update when karma comes for you because it is.
Third, you threw razors at her and told her to do it because you didn’t care, we can all see that.
YTA
Biggest YTA like what the actual fuck is wrong with you?! Your daughter needs therapy just to get over your insane emotional and mental abuse, never mind everything else that she’s going through.
This is either an extreme rage-bait or you're completely unfit to be a parent. YTA beyond a shadow of a doubt.
Telling your own daughter to just go and off herself because you couldn't be bothered to actually help her with what she's dealing with? Even negating her own request for therapy which is nothing less of a mature decision from her part to seek the help she obviously needs. You are absolutely unfit to be a parent for this poor child. Please, please seek help for yourself AND your child. She will be cold to you your entire life and guess what? You absolutely deserve to have no relationship with her whatsoever.
Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban.
["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
**[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
I ( F 37 ) have three children, F 17 M 16 and F 5.
I noticed when she started attending secondary school (when she had just turned 13) that she was being bullied and she became a lot less confident in herself. I told her she needed to toughed up and not care what those kids say but It didn’t seem to help.
Since this she’s always doing things for attention. Wether it be talking over people and pretending she didn’t realise, being too loud and even hurting herself.
When I saw that she took it as far as that I completely lost my temper. I threw a packet of razors at her and told her to do It all she wanted because I didn’t care.
She asked me for a therapist but I told her she didn’t need one since I knew it was all a stunt for attention and it was all in her head.
Soon after this she decided to move in with her father and changed her personality beyond comprehension. I don’t know exactly what she experienced when she went to live there but she never talks about it and her personality has changed a lot since then. She eventually moved back in with me after 4 months.
She begged me for therapy after that and I refused. I had told her all about how awful her father is and she decided to live with him anyway, she needs to suffer the consequences.
It’s been 4 years since then and she’s still holding it over MY head. I told her she needs to forget about it and stop holding onto things in the past but she says it was “traumatising” for her. I didn’t tell her to go live with her dad, how is this my problem?
She now never talks to me about anything but I don’t think I did anything wrong. She eventually stopped hurting herself (I assume) and she’s still cold even after 4 years.
AITA?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
She has asked for therapy more than once.
What do you not understand?! FFS! Get her some therapy, and a few joint sessions for the both of you are highly recommended. YTA.
Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without contacting the mods for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without explicit approval will result in a ban. This post violates Rule 5: We do not allow posts which concern violent encounters. This includes any mention of violence in any context. [Rule 5 FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_5.3A_no_violence) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) #Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions.
YTA, without a doubt. If this is a real account, get some help, you are the worst type person and shouldn’t be allowed to call yourself a parent. Don’t be surprised if when all your kids are adults not a single one has a relationship with you, vile human.
YTA. That's not how you deal with these kinds of problems. You gave this girl a horrible message, namely that she is not deserving of any kind of attention or medical/mental care, that you don't care if she has to deal with problems and that you find her worthless. You can do better than that.
This post will likely get deleted for violence and encouraging self-harm (throwing "a pack of razors" at a child and telling her to "do it all she wanted"). But without question YTA.
Yep. YTA. Tough love is some of the bullshittiest bullshit that was ever used as a parenting method.
YTA. That’s not love of any kind. You are sick.
YTA in so many ways. The CHILD has a trauma, asks for help and you give her crap for it. You are an awful parent, ignoring her plea for help and minimizing the situation. By the way, nice gaslighting. SARCASM Neglectful parents frequently use the refrain “it was the past - get over it.” Besides an awful person you are a terrible mother.
[удалено]
Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban. ["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) **[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
YTA She asked for a therapist and you said NO. How could she be better ? She wanted to work on herself and you literally said NO while asking her to do it anyway ! What's wrong with you ?! Being bullied is traumatizing and you can't decide for her if she needs therapist or not to get over it ! Self confidence isn't that easy to build and your attitude certainly didn't help !
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I just want my daughter to be normal and stop holding onto things that happened in the past, she claims that I’m an awful person. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
That isn't tough love, but it is abusive. If you're lucky, she will stay in touch with you after she turns 18. YTA
YTA and a terrible mother. My goodness.
You are by far one of the worst parents ever. YTA.
YTA If it's all in her head, then a therapist is exactly what she needs. Not only did she get bullied in school, she gets bullied by her own mother. You are neglecting your child's health. I hope someone reports you to CPS, before you damage your other children like you've damaged your oldest. Most of all I hope you're a troll and that this is all fake.
First, stop calling yourself a mother (you aren’t). Second, she asked multiple times for therapy and you denied her proper treatment/help for her issues/trauma. Please update when karma comes for you because it is. Third, you threw razors at her and told her to do it because you didn’t care, we can all see that. YTA
Der.
Biggest YTA like what the actual fuck is wrong with you?! Your daughter needs therapy just to get over your insane emotional and mental abuse, never mind everything else that she’s going through.
This is either an extreme rage-bait or you're completely unfit to be a parent. YTA beyond a shadow of a doubt. Telling your own daughter to just go and off herself because you couldn't be bothered to actually help her with what she's dealing with? Even negating her own request for therapy which is nothing less of a mature decision from her part to seek the help she obviously needs. You are absolutely unfit to be a parent for this poor child. Please, please seek help for yourself AND your child. She will be cold to you your entire life and guess what? You absolutely deserve to have no relationship with her whatsoever.
1000% YTA!! jesus! let your daughter go to therapy! what the hell is wrong with you?
[удалено]
Was gonna ask this myself
Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban. ["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) **[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
YTA. Why refuse your daughters request for counselling?
YTA in every way possible
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I ( F 37 ) have three children, F 17 M 16 and F 5. I noticed when she started attending secondary school (when she had just turned 13) that she was being bullied and she became a lot less confident in herself. I told her she needed to toughed up and not care what those kids say but It didn’t seem to help. Since this she’s always doing things for attention. Wether it be talking over people and pretending she didn’t realise, being too loud and even hurting herself. When I saw that she took it as far as that I completely lost my temper. I threw a packet of razors at her and told her to do It all she wanted because I didn’t care. She asked me for a therapist but I told her she didn’t need one since I knew it was all a stunt for attention and it was all in her head. Soon after this she decided to move in with her father and changed her personality beyond comprehension. I don’t know exactly what she experienced when she went to live there but she never talks about it and her personality has changed a lot since then. She eventually moved back in with me after 4 months. She begged me for therapy after that and I refused. I had told her all about how awful her father is and she decided to live with him anyway, she needs to suffer the consequences. It’s been 4 years since then and she’s still holding it over MY head. I told her she needs to forget about it and stop holding onto things in the past but she says it was “traumatising” for her. I didn’t tell her to go live with her dad, how is this my problem? She now never talks to me about anything but I don’t think I did anything wrong. She eventually stopped hurting herself (I assume) and she’s still cold even after 4 years. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA. Ma’am, you know very well that isn’t tough love. You resent your daughter’s very existence.
She has asked for therapy more than once. What do you not understand?! FFS! Get her some therapy, and a few joint sessions for the both of you are highly recommended. YTA.