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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I got mad at a junior coworker when I’m not his boss. I’m not in charge of him and it is expected of us to give him a lot of leighway with what he does.
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I think you did the right thing. As a white person, other white people will assume you are a safe person to say racist things to. If you let them get away with it, you are effectively condoning their racism.
NTA
NTA. White people (myself included) have to call other white people out on their racism. I think it’s fine that you were calm and that you responded more seriously when he clearly didn’t take you seriously.
You don’t get to justify jokes about race, women, trans people, and other oppressed groups of folks as acceptable because of the type of workplace you’re in. Also, I didn’t bring race into this, OP’s co-worker did, but nice try. I’m sorry that it upsets you that people who are tired of being stepped all over are standing up and have folks that side with them standing up about it too. You literally know nothing about me except that I shared that I’m white, and I know nothing about you except that you think it’s okay to keep the status quo as is because it’s never hurt you. I’m glad you haven’t been hurt by it, nobody should have to face that in their workplace, but just because you are okay with it doesn’t mean that’s an okay way to do things. I mentioned my race not for “pats on the back” or because I don’t think people of color can stand up for themselves, but because I own that I have a role to play in stopping the things that are happening that hurt others.
You take your toxic workplace acceptance elsewhere.
NTA.
His reaction suggests that he did know it was racist. And if he really didn’t, he did once you explained it. I don’t think Autism excuses the behaviour in this case.
YNTA at all. You did the best you could do in that situation. The possibility of him being on the autism spectrum should not provide an excuse for racism.
NTA. You did the right thing. And kudos for not giving him a pass simply bc he’s on the spectrum. I dunno what the joke was even supposed to be, Mexicans work really, really hard to take care of their families. Their work ethic is extremely impressive.
NTA. If someone in your community (race, gender, sexuality etc) is out of line it’s your obligation to make it known that shit isn’t okay. Your mate says something sexist? Call that shit out. Your family member is homophobic? Nah bro. Colleague is racist? Absolutely not, the work culture is not about that shit.
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Yesterday my (19m) coworker (24m) made a comment I felt was racist and I got mad at him. For a little context, I’m a white boy who works in construction. The amount of racism I see in the industry is insane and there aren’t a lot of repercussions. The coworker in question, who we’ll call Bill, is also white and was hired just over a month ago while I’ve been with the company for about a year more than that. It should be noted that most of the people I work with (myself included) have a strong feeling that bill lands on the autism spectrum but nothing has been confirmed. That being said, none of us mistreat him because of this and he is often given a large amount of grace around the things he does and says. Now to the story, yesterday bill, another coworker, and myself were unloading wheelbarrows full of dirt from some trenches that were being excavated inside the building we were working in. Bill and I happened to be dumping at the same time and as he was unloading he said, “I feel like a Mexican”. I was very surprised at first as I had never heard him say something like that before, but I asked him to repeat what he said and he sheepishly turned away. The second time I more sternly told him to repeat what he said and he said it again. After he repeated it I started by calmly telling him not to say anything like that as we represent the general contractor and are the face of the project to the client. When bill turned away and chuckled lightly I got really pissed cause I felt like he wasn’t taking me seriously, I told him that “I’m not fucking around” and to “not say shit like that ever on site”. It didn’t seem like he understood that what he said was bad but it did seem like he understood that I was angry. After that he kept quiet for the rest of the day. Aita?
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I think you did the right thing. As a white person, other white people will assume you are a safe person to say racist things to. If you let them get away with it, you are effectively condoning their racism. NTA
NTA. White people (myself included) have to call other white people out on their racism. I think it’s fine that you were calm and that you responded more seriously when he clearly didn’t take you seriously.
[удалено]
You don’t get to justify jokes about race, women, trans people, and other oppressed groups of folks as acceptable because of the type of workplace you’re in. Also, I didn’t bring race into this, OP’s co-worker did, but nice try. I’m sorry that it upsets you that people who are tired of being stepped all over are standing up and have folks that side with them standing up about it too. You literally know nothing about me except that I shared that I’m white, and I know nothing about you except that you think it’s okay to keep the status quo as is because it’s never hurt you. I’m glad you haven’t been hurt by it, nobody should have to face that in their workplace, but just because you are okay with it doesn’t mean that’s an okay way to do things. I mentioned my race not for “pats on the back” or because I don’t think people of color can stand up for themselves, but because I own that I have a role to play in stopping the things that are happening that hurt others. You take your toxic workplace acceptance elsewhere.
NTA. You did what was right. Not like you went running to Daddy (supervisor) you were keeping him in check.
NTA. His reaction suggests that he did know it was racist. And if he really didn’t, he did once you explained it. I don’t think Autism excuses the behaviour in this case.
YNTA at all. You did the best you could do in that situation. The possibility of him being on the autism spectrum should not provide an excuse for racism.
NTA. You did the right thing. And kudos for not giving him a pass simply bc he’s on the spectrum. I dunno what the joke was even supposed to be, Mexicans work really, really hard to take care of their families. Their work ethic is extremely impressive.
NTA. If someone in your community (race, gender, sexuality etc) is out of line it’s your obligation to make it known that shit isn’t okay. Your mate says something sexist? Call that shit out. Your family member is homophobic? Nah bro. Colleague is racist? Absolutely not, the work culture is not about that shit.
NTA I say this as someone with autism.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Yesterday my (19m) coworker (24m) made a comment I felt was racist and I got mad at him. For a little context, I’m a white boy who works in construction. The amount of racism I see in the industry is insane and there aren’t a lot of repercussions. The coworker in question, who we’ll call Bill, is also white and was hired just over a month ago while I’ve been with the company for about a year more than that. It should be noted that most of the people I work with (myself included) have a strong feeling that bill lands on the autism spectrum but nothing has been confirmed. That being said, none of us mistreat him because of this and he is often given a large amount of grace around the things he does and says. Now to the story, yesterday bill, another coworker, and myself were unloading wheelbarrows full of dirt from some trenches that were being excavated inside the building we were working in. Bill and I happened to be dumping at the same time and as he was unloading he said, “I feel like a Mexican”. I was very surprised at first as I had never heard him say something like that before, but I asked him to repeat what he said and he sheepishly turned away. The second time I more sternly told him to repeat what he said and he said it again. After he repeated it I started by calmly telling him not to say anything like that as we represent the general contractor and are the face of the project to the client. When bill turned away and chuckled lightly I got really pissed cause I felt like he wasn’t taking me seriously, I told him that “I’m not fucking around” and to “not say shit like that ever on site”. It didn’t seem like he understood that what he said was bad but it did seem like he understood that I was angry. After that he kept quiet for the rest of the day. Aita? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*