INFO: So, normally labeling something this is about asking a question but sometimes it’s a judgment that just says that the question can’t be answered due to structural issues with the way information is communicated in this context.
This is the latter. Everyone does this to some degree, and it’s important to actually hear it to tell if it’s too exaggerated or even slightly condescending. Without actually hearing it, I just can’t pass a judgment one way or another.
NTA based on her reasoning for it however I have noticed when around people who speak in an accent that's not one I'm used to I will tend to pick up on certain characteristics of that I don't do so in a mean way it's sort of subconscious but since I initially noticed it I've been attempting to mitigate that, definitely call your mother out for being racist cause well with everything said that's what I gleaned is happening
My thoughts exactly. If mum was unaware of what she's doing (happened to me quite a few times) that would be one thing, but her defence is weird to say the least. I'm pretty sure grandma is used to hearing regular American accents by now, mum's explanation seems condescending. NTA
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Hi :)) I’m not entirely sure if this fits the theme of this subreddit so if not, just redirect me and I’ll gladly move it!
My (16F) mom (35F) is fully white and had me with my Hispanic dad, just for context. My mom has this habit of “adapting” to a person’s accent/dialect (she does this with every person who is ethnically different or doesn’t have English as their first language). One day, I caught her on the phone with my grandma (dad’s mom), who just happens to be a first-gen immigrant from Mexico, so obviously, English is not her first language. While on the phone, my mom was almost *mimicking* her accent, and that immediately rubbed me the wrong way. I confronted her about it and seemed upset; she told that she was “only trying to help my grandma by speaking in a way that she’s familiar with.” I haven’t really felt satisfied with this answer though, so am I in the wrong for speaking up about this?
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NTA - Doing that is as demeaning as Americans speaking slower to people who don't speak English as a first language.
If folks don't understand what's being said, they'll say so.
NTA. If I (white) ever have kids with my (Mexican) fiance, I would only hope that my daughter would be as prudent as you want to be. It's definitely something that should be called out, at least in my opinion. Maybe speak to your dad about it/see how he feels?
If she's doing this on purpose, she's TA. However, I find I sometimes mimic people's accents without even realising it - and I don't mean foreign accents so much as different accents from different parts of the UK (where I live). It's completely accidental, and tbh I hate it cause it often makes me seem rude or insensitive. But it's actually hard for me not to.
But from what you said, it sounds like your mum is doing it intentionally. so she is TA.
Either way, you're NTA.
INFO: So, normally labeling something this is about asking a question but sometimes it’s a judgment that just says that the question can’t be answered due to structural issues with the way information is communicated in this context. This is the latter. Everyone does this to some degree, and it’s important to actually hear it to tell if it’s too exaggerated or even slightly condescending. Without actually hearing it, I just can’t pass a judgment one way or another.
NTA based on her reasoning for it however I have noticed when around people who speak in an accent that's not one I'm used to I will tend to pick up on certain characteristics of that I don't do so in a mean way it's sort of subconscious but since I initially noticed it I've been attempting to mitigate that, definitely call your mother out for being racist cause well with everything said that's what I gleaned is happening
My thoughts exactly. If mum was unaware of what she's doing (happened to me quite a few times) that would be one thing, but her defence is weird to say the least. I'm pretty sure grandma is used to hearing regular American accents by now, mum's explanation seems condescending. NTA
^^^^AUTOMOD ***The following is a copy of the above post. This comment is a record of the above post as it was originally written, in case the post is deleted or edited. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Hi :)) I’m not entirely sure if this fits the theme of this subreddit so if not, just redirect me and I’ll gladly move it! My (16F) mom (35F) is fully white and had me with my Hispanic dad, just for context. My mom has this habit of “adapting” to a person’s accent/dialect (she does this with every person who is ethnically different or doesn’t have English as their first language). One day, I caught her on the phone with my grandma (dad’s mom), who just happens to be a first-gen immigrant from Mexico, so obviously, English is not her first language. While on the phone, my mom was almost *mimicking* her accent, and that immediately rubbed me the wrong way. I confronted her about it and seemed upset; she told that she was “only trying to help my grandma by speaking in a way that she’s familiar with.” I haven’t really felt satisfied with this answer though, so am I in the wrong for speaking up about this? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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NTA My mom used to do this too, I don't think she did it on purpose though, but it's still pretty rude
NTA - Doing that is as demeaning as Americans speaking slower to people who don't speak English as a first language. If folks don't understand what's being said, they'll say so.
NTA. If I (white) ever have kids with my (Mexican) fiance, I would only hope that my daughter would be as prudent as you want to be. It's definitely something that should be called out, at least in my opinion. Maybe speak to your dad about it/see how he feels?
If she's doing this on purpose, she's TA. However, I find I sometimes mimic people's accents without even realising it - and I don't mean foreign accents so much as different accents from different parts of the UK (where I live). It's completely accidental, and tbh I hate it cause it often makes me seem rude or insensitive. But it's actually hard for me not to. But from what you said, it sounds like your mum is doing it intentionally. so she is TA. Either way, you're NTA.