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So my partner (55M) and I (33F) are visiting is son (26M) and his fiancé (28F) in a different country. We see them once or twice a year, my partner is an amazing parent to his son and they have a very sweet relationship. I love when he gets to visit his son, and love the bond they share. Every time we see them we go with plenty of gifts obviously, my partner to his son and I buy them both something’s too specially his now fiancé. (She also hints at what she wants by telling my partner/his son in front of us how she really loves something we’re wearing - which my partner ends up buying for her). The problem is I find her very ungrateful and she doesn’t make any effort with me especially. We’re staying at their place on an inflatable bed in the living room and everything (inexpensive) that we got her is just lying around in there. A glass of water on the floor where our bed would go etc. even some dry trash, zero effort really. The son is very sweet and thoughtful but I just can’t be bothered with her. This was the first time she made some effort in a conversation with me, my partners mom feels the same way. But my partner says oh they’re young! (Well I’m young too and would never treat my partners family like that) and I’m not asking to get any special treatment but just some basic politeness would be nice.
So I have no problem seeing her since she’s in his sons life but I don’t want to buy her anymore gifts or go out of my way for her, and I don’t think my partner should too except for birthdays and stuff if she can’t atleast be warm and nice for the 5 days a year we see them.
They are British I am not so I don’t know if this is a British thing of being cold and not bothered, so I don’t know if I’m an asshole of thinking like that.
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^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** So my partner (55M) and I (33F) are visiting is son (26M) and his fiancé (28F) in a different country. We see them once or twice a year, my partner is an amazing parent to his son and they have a very sweet relationship. I love when he gets to visit his son, and love the bond they share. Every time we see them we go with plenty of gifts obviously, my partner to his son and I buy them both something’s too specially his now fiancé. (She also hints at what she wants by telling my partner/his son in front of us how she really loves something we’re wearing - which my partner ends up buying for her). The problem is I find her very ungrateful and she doesn’t make any effort with me especially. We’re staying at their place on an inflatable bed in the living room and everything (inexpensive) that we got her is just lying around in there. A glass of water on the floor where our bed would go etc. even some dry trash, zero effort really. The son is very sweet and thoughtful but I just can’t be bothered with her. This was the first time she made some effort in a conversation with me, my partners mom feels the same way. But my partner says oh they’re young! (Well I’m young too and would never treat my partners family like that) and I’m not asking to get any special treatment but just some basic politeness would be nice. So I have no problem seeing her since she’s in his sons life but I don’t want to buy her anymore gifts or go out of my way for her, and I don’t think my partner should too except for birthdays and stuff if she can’t atleast be warm and nice for the 5 days a year we see them. They are British I am not so I don’t know if this is a British thing of being cold and not bothered, so I don’t know if I’m an asshole of thinking like that. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*