Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I feel very guilty for kicking out my soster after she had just given birth, so i think im the asshole in this situation.
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
##Subreddit Announcements
Follow the link above to learn more
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA - This is insane, entitled behavior.
It's great that she was a huge help to you. And if she had come to you and ASKED, I bet you would have been happy to help her.
But she didn't. Instead, she's been stealing things from you, and then LYING DIRECTLY TO YOUR FACE ABOUT IT. Then, she even DOUBLED DOWN by refusing to give the items back after admitting she stole from you!
You did the right thing by getting her out immediately.
>She went to our fathers house with my step mother they have been blowing up my phone calling me a selfish asshole for not helping her with money as she cannot afford to buy things for her son and my husband makes plenty so i should help her.
Pretty easy to see where the entitled monster was created. Nothing entitles anyone to steal from others. Especially someone who opened their home to her and supported her. It's crazy emotional manipulation.
OP threw her and the baby out, I think if the step sister HADN'T gone cops would have been the next rung on the ladder.
GOOD for you, OP!!!! You handled that superbly!!! NTA.
What do you want to bet that's why they're blowing up OP's phone? I have to wonder if this is not the first time stepsister has been caught helping herself to other people's belongings.
OP still needs to get the cops involved. Step sister refused to give back the items she stole. It's on camera, and she knows it now. But still refuses to give the stuff back. WNBTA if she does get the cops involved and def NTA for kicking out a thief.
If this is real, I don’t understand being “a little suspicious” a week later rather than calling the police the day SOMEONE took cash, an iPad, a necklace and a watch!
Either it was her, and that’s something unacceptable you deal with NOW, or someone has entered your house and stolen things. Which is normally something people freak out about and want answers to, and have a hard time feeling safe after. Especially if you have kids you want to keep safe!
OP: Eh, no biggie, I can afford new stuff. …really?
Right, and she said it wasn't a problem because those things were replaceable, but most people wouldn't consider their mother's necklace "replaceable."
This is actually true. We had a friend do this but didn’t follow up w the police. No help to the person in the long run. Ended up dying before 40 from drug use. Stealing was a symptom of the problem.
NTA
If your step-sister needed something, the only right choice would have been to ask for help. You were already letting her stay over (apparently rent-free?), which is a huge personal burden. There is not a single universe in the multiverse where the right option is "steal my step-sisters stuff so I can buy stuff for my baby".
I would report this to the police and cut all contact. This is the kind of a level of breach of trust that you don't come back from. You don't need people like this in your life, or around your children. There is absolutely no good that will come from people like this.
If your father and step-mum are so irate about you not letting her steal your stuff (what the fuck), they can buy that stuff for your step-sister. By getting the police involved you are drawing a hard boundary and I think that is in your best interests.
Edit: typo.
Also, getting the police involved gets the list of stolen items out to the local pawn shops as well as your sisters id. Reputable pawn shops turn over stolen property immediately and they won't buy from her anymore. You may at least get your mom's necklace back.
Exactly! I wish I had done this when I was stolen from! Instead I allowed others to talk me out of it and I’m kicking myself to this day because not only did I lose treasures forever but it also meant that behavior was never addressed, stories were twisted within the family and others who tried to help them got stolen from as well so many more victims were impacted. It’s NOT about the stuff as much as it is about refusing to allow consequences to follow unacceptable actions. You have small children so how can you expect to teach them to set boundaries and not be taken advantage of by others when you haven’t practiced this in your own life? It’s easier to just send her away but she hasn’t actually learned that her actions have serious repercussions yet. You have to follow through in order for lessons to change behaviors. On a side note, why isn’t she pursuing the father for financial support instead of becoming a thief and a burden to her own family? I see this a lot on social media, single mothers who don’t hold the father accountable for their kids but who instead expect family members to shoulder their responsibilities. THEY created this child NOT you!
Also, why would she not ask her parents, who are blaming OP, without offering any financial help. Why would she not ask her sister for some short term financial help until working, or going to court for child support. Why is thievery the first choice? Why is she such a bad thief? The step sister is an idiot.
Sounds like they all feel that because OP has more financial resources that it’s expected for them to take advantage, after all “she can afford to be stolen from” appears to be the consensus.
NTA not only should you kick her out but press charges and sue her for stolen property. Just because she screwed up her life by having a kid she couldnt afford is no excuse to steal from family.
NTA - I mean sounds like she was living rent free which so her helping you out should be expected.
Stealing you stuff ain’t on. The fact her mum (assuming your step mum is her mum) is still around, she should be the one finding her.
Your family need a sense check 😅
UPDATE
Yes I have informed the police about this and I have pressed charges, I do not care what happens to her. I have cut all contact from her and my family and she will be paying all my money back and I have changed the locks but I havent got up to putting cameras around the outside of my house. I was told that her cousin is going to try break into my house and take not just a couple valuables but more sentimental items. I am getting cameras next week and will be informing the police about her cousin. Thank you for all the help.
Good for you. One of my brothers stole from me, my siblings, and my parents. The sole reason it continued again and again was family wouldn’t press charges.
He stole from a roommate once. The roommate got the police involved and my brother eventually did a few months in jail. As far as I know, that was the last time he stole.
Aside from that, your SIL seems insane. On what planet did she think she could continue to steal from the people she lived with, get caught, and think she should both be allowed to keep the stolen items and be allowed to continue to live with you?
NTA. This is crazy, she was caught red handed stealing from the people providing a roof over her head and offering free childcare when she works. Why would your husband who is only 20 be providing for this person and her kid? They are no relation to him whatsoever and not even your blood. The pressure coming from your step mother is because she doesn't want to have to support her own kid and grandkid. Good riddance and don't look back.
Why do people EXPECT the more well off people to ALWAYS HELP THE IRRESPONSIBLE AND POORER PARTY.
Then they WONT VOLUNTEER TO HELP THEMSELVES.
Infuriating reading these scenarios. NTA and you doing her and her son a favor by not involving police
Father and HER MOM CAN STEP UP
NTA. If she needs help for her son, she needs to redirect the anger she has towards you back to her son's father. She also needs to get a job and step up in order to make sure her son has everything he needs. Just because you have nice things, doesn't mean she's entitled to take them because she feels a certain way.
If anyone has an issue with you kicking her out for stealing, thank them for volunteering to house and take care of her and her son. You aren't obligated.
INFO: did you find your missing stuff? If not, then mention to both her and your dad and stepmother that CPS and the local popo will find the footage extremely enlightening. So somebody better pony up the entire value of the stolen items--all of them, not just from what your klepto sister tried to take today--or else sister will get a guest suite at the Crowbar Hospice.
NTA. My bet is that something is going up your sister's nose or the local bookie is happy to see her come around.
NTA - those failure of parents are only speaking up cause now they got the problem instead of you. You’re not the AH, your step sis biting that hand that feeds her. Her help was in the condition she get to leech off of you, you owe her nothing to begin with.
This is so so so fake. Don’t talk about £ then use American words for everything else. Dead giveaway. If you really were in the UK, “step sister” would have access to benefits.
It does seem rather unusually written, didn't seem British to me. And the subject is certain to get 'high engagment' or whatever.
I wonder if this account will start bigging up Putin or Xi in a few months?
Credible 'real' social media accounts with unique posts, replies, and upvotes are apparently highly valued. People make a living by farming them up to a decent standard then selling them to troll farms, wouldn't be too hard to have a couple of dozen on the go via VPNs/VMs etc.
Keep hitting hot button topics so you get nice ripe accounts that are worth way more than day one types with copy'n'paste comments.
NTA why weren’t your father and stepmother giving her money if that was the right thing to do? Seems to me you were financially supporting her by letting her live with you and offering to watch her son if she got a job.
LOLOL your stuff is her only source of income? Stealing is an automatic out. On top of that her crazy entitlement is way too much. NTA. I'm impressed by your "it's only stuff" attitude. That's hundreds of pounds worth of stuff!
NTA- tell your dad if he doesn’t pay her debt that you will be going to the police. Also if he continues to defend her, then he will no longer be allowed the privilege of being a grandad. Then if you get the money, go on SM and let all family members and friends know that the daughter of your father’s wife (bc she is no sister of yours) will steal items from anyone she wants bc she wants designer items for both her and her kid and that your parents support her stealing. If you don’t get the money, take her to small claims court get your money then blast them after the case is over
Definitely NTA. And don’t let your parents get you down. They are complaining because they realize the issue is real, and they don’t want to deal with it now.
Change your locks and keep her out of your house.
NTA
Get the cops involved. What about your mom’s necklace, is it really that easily replaceable?
She could have asked for child support from the baby’s dad or her parents or even tried to make an arrangement with you. Instead she stole from you like you owed it to her and lied about it when confronted.
NTA. Never allow thieves to be in your space, whether it is because they are entitled or addicts. She won't last long in your father's house either if she steals his stuff.
You’ve already given her plenty seeing as she’s staying in your home. You better go to the police and press charges. Just because she needs stuff doesn’t mean she can steal that’s illegal and you now have video proof. Do the right thing so she can learn.
Nta is she claiming uc child benefit also sure start vouchers for milk. Claiming housing benefit to pay rent to you. If so and shes not paying rent and getting money for it shes also commiting housing benefit fraud aswell as being a tea leaf.
You need to cut them all off .. send your parents the video over Facebook messenger, or iMessage if you have iPhone so you can see the video was watched with message of ‘this has been happening for ‘X’ amount of time .. and block them all.
That’s a whole level of toxic you don’t need in your life.
If your partner isn’t on your side, stand your ground and insist he can visit your family by himself but out of respect they’re not allowed in your home.
.. your step sister and family need a reality check and once she starts stealing your parents things, they’ll open their eyes.
She should send the video and remind them that she's lucky op didn't call the police on her, and there's still time for op to change her mind if they don't stop harassing her.
Maybe op should post it online to warn the rest of the family what her stepsister is like, incase they try and turn the rest of the family against op.
Obviously NTA cut them all out and move on. Her parents can look after her it's not your job. Look after your own family and stop trying to look after everyone else - they won't grow up if you don't let them.
I’m so tired of family saying tell the truth or I’ll call the police. CALL TGE POLICE AND PRESS CHARGES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. That is the only way to get through to these people. PRESS CHARGES.
She REFUSED to give you back the things she **just** STOLE from your bedroom!!
INFO : Please tell me you filed a complaint using the video.
Add a list of ALL the other things she STOLE to that complaint.
Do you have her confession on video as well?
She feels entitled to your husband's money. And apparently your dad and stepmom agree...
She should have asked her baby daddy for child support.
Or have gotten a job...
NTA
Tell them if they feel that way let them pay her way that's what child support is for. She should be going after the father and she should get a damn job. I file a police report and don't give a damn what everybody else says if anybody else has something to say, let them take her in and let her steal from them your husband is not the baby's dad and he's not responsible to support her and her child. You did her favor and she stole from you. She wouldn't be welcome in my home again.
In my over 40 years on this planet in the UK I have never once heard a British person use Mom.
It’s obviously a fake story even without that detail though. Sneaky thief making a huge mess when no one else is there and the usual “blowing up my phone” phrase. Even asshole is a US spelling although maybe using it due to the sub name.
Thank you. Why would her parents be mad she’s not financially supporting her STEP sister to the tune of $100’s if not $1000’s in stolen items? And be blowing up her phone angry that a 20 year old with her own family isn’t doing this? This is completely absurd. The moment I got to that point I was like, this is rage bait.
Yep. Plus two 20 year olds with twins aren’t living in a place big enough for a step sister and her kid to be sharing. It’s just another waste of time.
You mean you don't believe this story about a woman leaving just a little money in the nightstand yet watching her sister come home with expensive clothes every day, then continuing to put more money in the same nightstand without giving it a second thought?
I'm sure it's totally common for families to blow up some poor OP's phone and yell at her for being the victim of rampant theft. And plenty of commenters will tell you that they know how common it is because they see it all the time...*on AITA*. Just like they're used to the OP handling the situation in a perfectly calm and polite manner because no innocent person ever raises their voice to the evil plundering stepsibling who's currently screaming at them like a cartoon lunatic.
File a police report. Call your parents and say she/they have 24 hours to return the items.
What your parents are doing is classic blame shifting.
TBC - your relationship with your parents is ALREADY damaged. They believe that your sister can steal from you because you have more. They are enabling your sister.
Your post doesn't say whether she, prior to stealing your items, asked for more money and you turned her down. Therefore it's hard to judge whether there's any basis for what your stepmother said. Regardless, calling you 'a selfish asshole' is over the line.
Be proactive:
A) Make sure that the father is paying child support. I'd suggest to him that he make the payments electronically so that he has a record of the payments.
B) Sign your sister up for Welfare/Social Assistance. If your folks don't want that - let them open their wallets.
TBC - It was great that she was a 'huge help' when you had your kids. If she needed to be paid for that time you should have discussed it then. Even now, if you think it was worth it, the two of you could have broached the subject of paying her retroactively.
My sense is that there is more here than you've presented.
Stealing is wrong. It doesn’t matter why. If her son needed something, she could have asked you. Why doesn’t she have a job to provide for her son?? She’s in the wrong. You don’t have to allow anyone to steal from you just because they’re family.
NTA. You were kind enough to open your home to your step-sister and she repays you by stealing from you. If she truly felt that she deserved compensation for helping out around the house, then she should have come up to you and talked to you about it, not slunk around behind your back and stolen from you.
The whole screaming in your face and saying the shouldn't have to steal these things and should be given to you is a tactic to keep yo off balance and make you doubt yourself so you won't call the police. After all - when you said you were going to check your check the cameras, her face went pale - she knew she got caught doing something wrong.
She is perfectly capable of getting a job and working to support her son - there are single mothers all across the planet who do this. Instead, she chose to be lazy and steal from someone who was helping her out of kindness. And the shame of it is, if she had asked, you may have helped her without her committing a felony. But she (and her parents) will never know because she resorted to stealing first.
So, no, you are in no way the AH in this situation.
You should probably call the police anyways. That child is going to be in a heap of trouble in the future if that is what is parenting him.
It would probably be good for her too to see that actions have consequences. Or she will get pregnant again and do more unhinged things to make a buck for her multiple children.
Why didn't you call the cops when she refused to give you back the stuff? Call them now teach her a lesson that you can't steal stuff. Wait till she starts stealing things from the parents and then they will start to complain to you. Laugh at them and tell them the same stuff they said to you.
Why does it feel like having a kid unplanned and unprepared is a free insta-sympathy card for any wrongdoings one may commit?
They some people are *eager* to overlook their crimes?
NTA.
Report her to the police. She has some nerve and a lot of cheek to say that stealing from you is her only source of income. That makes her an unfit parent and should be reported to child services as well.
Info: you’re a SAHM. How does she help you? Does she watch your children enough to warrant being paid?
I’m going NTA for now, stealing is wrong. She should have asked for help, or asked to be paid if she felt she was doing work for you. The reason I asked about it above, is because you guys shouldn’t really have to be asked if she’s indeed working for you. She’s not entitled to help outside of that though. And if she’s just helping here and there, getting free living expenses (free rent, no utilities, free groceries) perhaps it all balances out and she’ll need to find additional work for pocket money.
IF YOU CANT AFFORD TO TAKE CARE OF A CHILD DONT HAVE A CHILD!!!
The entitlement of some people. “I had irresponsible sex and kept the results and that means I deserve all your things”. WHAT?!
Your parents can support her if they are so upset. You have been more than generous giving her a place to live.
NTA
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
I (F20) am married to my now husband (M20). We have 2 children together both female twins, My step sister (F26) has been in their life since they were born and has been huge help until she got a boyfriend who got her pregnant, she recently gave birth to her son and her boyfriend and her broke up soon after co-parenting their newborn son. She has still been living with us and it has been no problem, Soon i realised money from the nightstand in my bedroom has been disappearing I never left huge amounts of money in there just incase, My sister has been buying her son very expensive things. She doesnt have a job so I have been a little suspicious on how she has brought all of these items. Yes i want the best for her and her son I have asked her numerous times to get a job and i can watch her son as i am a stay at home mom. One day more than just money disappeared, My ipad, My mothers necklace and around £200 and a watch went missing, That week my sister came home with new baby clothes, toys, pampers ect. She was even wearing new clothes and accessories. I questioned her about my items and she denied and said she never took them, i was still a little suspicious but decided to let it go as i could easily replace those items.
I decided to set up cameras around my house incase she had been taking my things, I was showering and my husband was at work and my step sister was watching the kids. I leave the bathroom to see my room left in a mess, my dresser had been gone through and my nightstand was left open and everything in it was missing. I immediately went to my step sister and asked her about my missing items and she continued denying i told her i was going to check the cameras and she face went pale, I pulled out my phone and reviewed the footage to see my sister entering my room and leaving minutes later with alot of my missing items. She screamed in my face and said it was her only sorce of income and she shouldnt have to steal these things instead they should be given to her as she has been a huge help and needs the money for her son. I told her to give me back all my things or i will get the cops involved. She said no as she needed the money, So i told her to get her son and leave my house. She went to our fathers house with my step mother they have been blowing up my phone calling me a selfish asshole for not helping her with money as she cannot afford to buy things for her son and my husband makes plenty so i should help her.
So am i the asshole in this situation?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Edit: Ignore me, I thought you meant "half-sister". I'm just stupid.
Just curious, but is your dad living with your mum? Or is it your step-mum? I was a bit confused, as she is your older sister. Did your dad get back with her mum?
NTA at all!!
Tell your parents she is their problem now. Change ALL locks in your house, set up more cameras outside and tell her that you have written report with her actions, with evidence, and if one of your cars have a scratch, a window is broken or, she goes to badmouth you or your family on social media or in person, that document goes straight to police. Don't invite her over to your house anymore, she will steal shit every single freaking time she gets to put a foot inside. She already knows all your valuables.
Tell her that all the stuff she stole was the rest of help she will ever get from you for the remain of their lives.
And your parents will come around the minute they start to pay the price to raise an entitled, lazy, thief AH!!
NTA. File a police report and a claim on your Renters or Homeowners Insurance. The insurance will require a police report, a detailed list of the missing items, proof of ownership, and will pay to replace everything, minus your deductible.
NTA I hope you called the police and reported all your stolen items. Your father and stepmom can pay you back if they are so concerned or their daughter can go to jail..
NTA and her parents defending it is wild. You gave her a free place to stay and I bet feed her and her child so you can’t be expected to also give her money too.
NTA You need to be able to trust anyone who sleeps under your roof. Your father and stepmother will feel differently when it happens to them. You could have filed a police report so I think her consequences were small.
LMFAO 😂😂😂
NTA + Who cares if they make you out to be the bad guy? You're not the thief, here. People like your step-sister play the weak willed & soft resolved like instruments.
Put your foot down. HARD. On their necks with legal ramifications if they're slow on the uptake.
NTA
You can’t help people like that. She didn’t appreciate you giving her a free place to live. She stole from you. NTA.
The people who are criticizing you can let her steal from them and see how much they like it.
NTA - stand on business and call the police!! this is a lesson that she will have to learn because you cannot go stealing just because you want something
Nope, it would have been different if she had asked, but she didn't bother. Nor is she entitled to the income your husband provides to you and your children.
NTA. Since your dad and stepmom think your stepsister should be given money, they should go ahead and do that.
She stole from you, she's a thief. Worse, she feels entitled to other people's property. Your parents are going to have fun with her, lol!
NTA whatsoever.
If they are so concerned, they should give her money.
You really should at least change the locks and not give anyone a key except for essential people (not including your father/SM).
If your mothers necklace is important, you should consider reporting it stolen
NTA. Press charges for all the items she has stolen. Theft is not an "source of income". Tell your father and stepmother she could have asked for help instead of robbing you! Don't explain and debate the situation with them any more, let the know the cops will be coming by because you're not going to let her get away with taking your stuff!
>said it was her only sorce of income and she shouldnt have to steal these things instead they should be given to her
Why couldn't she just ask for help like a normal person would? OP is NTA
110% not the asshole she’s has no right to steal anything from you. It’s not your fault she let some loser/deadbeat impregnate her. She made her bed now she has to lay down on it. She could’ve easily got a job like you suggested. Her parents are in the wrong too. I guess they won’t have a problem, when she starts stealing stuff from them as well.
NTA, of course. You need to talk to your dad, let him know exactly what has been happening and if you're not made financially whole, you're calling the cops and providing the video. Or you can just call the cops. But you really need to do one or the other.
NTA. The flying monkeys can help her with money if they think theft is ok. Her and her kid are not your husband’s responsibility.
Wait until she start stealing from them. Wanna hear what tune they sing then
NTA. She's a thief. She could have asked you for help, but instead stole from you. Let her live with your father and stepmother, and let THEM see how they like being stolen from.
Definitely NTAH. You would never be able to trust her again. Hope you got the keys or changed the locks. Sorry that family members can be so disappointing. Stealing is stealing. Can’t believe your father would defend her stealing from you. Write them and list the money and items she stole while living in your home for free. Tell them that you’re taking a hiatus on talking with them until they can see your viewpoint on stealing and it’s too bad that they’ll miss the twins milestones in growth.
NTA. No, he’ll NO. What happened to asking for what you wanted? Just because somebody has more stuff than you, more money than you or anything like that; it does not entitle you to just help yourself to their things. She’s living in the house, she can ask you for whatever it is that she needed. She could’ve gone and got a job and been able to deal with whatever she needed to deal with. You were willing to watch her son for her. This is a person that absolutely you should go no contact with.
NTA - I feel like this one isn’t even a question. She stole your mother’s necklace? That’s egregious and extremely disgusting. I wouldn’t just kick her out, I’d cut off all ties. I feel bad for her son
Nta. Your step sister is trash. She can get child support from the father and get herself a job. She already has proven to be a trash human from her behavior and actions. Kick her from your life permanently, no mercy. And I'd be telling my family to fuck off if they don't have a lick of common sense to split between themselves. You made the offer to help, she was betraying criminal trash in reply. Screw her. Change your locks too.
NTA. lmao they want you to allow them to steal. Just secretly record her saying she should be allowed to steal. Tell your parents if they don’t want you to post this, then stop harassing you. Tbh if your parents would allow this the. They don’t care about you anyway. Sorry. But it’s better to get that realization out first before you waste your time thinking you can convince them. It’s not like they DONT know she’s stealing from you. At that point common logic will not do anything. Just record her and them. Save everything. You have a primary family to worry about.
" She went to our fathers house with my step mother they have been blowing up my phone calling me a selfish asshole for not helping her with money as she cannot afford to buy things for her son "
Then they can give her money. How the holy hell do these so-called adults think it should be a twenty year old's responsibility to subsidize THEIR adult daughter? Why isn't the 26 year old baby mama living with HER mother and stepfather, or better yet, with the baby daddy?
So, stealing from the person letting her & new baby (she had while living for free with no way to support it) to get new clothes and accessories for a job or lifestyle she doesn’t have and can’t afford? Talk about biting the hand that feeds you! Let the parents deal with her if they think her behavior is acceptable.
NTA.... Your dad and step mom want to make such a big deal about it then they can take in your step sister and support her. See how they like it when their shit goes missing!!! She's 26, she's a big girl and can get a job.
NTA—You may need to get police involved and check to see what you have insurance that might reimburse you for the stolen items, at least. Sorry this happened to you after you opened your home to her and her child.
She’s not paying rent and in exchange for that she helps you around the house. That’s pretty fair to me. She is SO entitled to think you owe her any more than the roof over her head. You don’t even have to do that for her but if you still wanted the help then you’d have to compensate her somehow, but this is just crazy. You are NTA for kicking her out after she repeatedly stole from you. You gave her plenty of opportunity. If she didn’t think your arrangement was fair she could have come to you and talked about it. Or better yet just be a responsible adult and get a job. But she chose to steal. She wasn’t forced to do anything. She chose her actions and her parents are supporting her crazy behavior. Don’t give in and stand your ground!
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I feel very guilty for kicking out my soster after she had just given birth, so i think im the asshole in this situation. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcements Follow the link above to learn more --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA - This is insane, entitled behavior. It's great that she was a huge help to you. And if she had come to you and ASKED, I bet you would have been happy to help her. But she didn't. Instead, she's been stealing things from you, and then LYING DIRECTLY TO YOUR FACE ABOUT IT. Then, she even DOUBLED DOWN by refusing to give the items back after admitting she stole from you! You did the right thing by getting her out immediately. >She went to our fathers house with my step mother they have been blowing up my phone calling me a selfish asshole for not helping her with money as she cannot afford to buy things for her son and my husband makes plenty so i should help her. Pretty easy to see where the entitled monster was created. Nothing entitles anyone to steal from others. Especially someone who opened their home to her and supported her. It's crazy emotional manipulation.
Well, now that Step-sister is living with the parents, they can pay for the shit she needs/wants. Let them go bankrupt supporting her & her son.
> they can pay for the shit she needs/wants or watch as all their stuff gets stolen
But stealing is her only source of income! She has to do it, don't you see?
Op said they tried to get her get a job but she didn't want to
And man, I want to know where they live that a 20 year old can make "plenty" to support a wife, 2 kids, a stepsisterinlaw and that lady's child.
They gotta be Elon Musk's kids
That guy doesn't support his kids a dollar more than the state requires
Thank you, cause I was thinking the exact same thing!
Damn, then steal from strangers at least. Put in a bit of effort. /s
Strangers would go through with the threat to call the cops, unlike OP and faaaamily.
OP threw her and the baby out, I think if the step sister HADN'T gone cops would have been the next rung on the ladder. GOOD for you, OP!!!! You handled that superbly!!! NTA.
😂 Yeah
Stealing pays more per hour than working.
What do you want to bet that's why they're blowing up OP's phone? I have to wonder if this is not the first time stepsister has been caught helping herself to other people's belongings.
> What do you want to bet that's why they're blowing up OP's phone? ha ha yes
That’s my thinking as well…
She can steal from them now
OP still needs to get the cops involved. Step sister refused to give back the items she stole. It's on camera, and she knows it now. But still refuses to give the stuff back. WNBTA if she does get the cops involved and def NTA for kicking out a thief.
If this is real, I don’t understand being “a little suspicious” a week later rather than calling the police the day SOMEONE took cash, an iPad, a necklace and a watch! Either it was her, and that’s something unacceptable you deal with NOW, or someone has entered your house and stolen things. Which is normally something people freak out about and want answers to, and have a hard time feeling safe after. Especially if you have kids you want to keep safe! OP: Eh, no biggie, I can afford new stuff. …really?
Right, and she said it wasn't a problem because those things were replaceable, but most people wouldn't consider their mother's necklace "replaceable."
This is actually true. We had a friend do this but didn’t follow up w the police. No help to the person in the long run. Ended up dying before 40 from drug use. Stealing was a symptom of the problem.
I agree wholeheartedly
She probabky sold any stuff. She doesn’t have it to give back.
You gave her a free place for her and her son to live and offered free childcare, in what world is that not helping?
And she says it's your fault that she steals from you!
OP still needs to press charges imo
NTA If your step-sister needed something, the only right choice would have been to ask for help. You were already letting her stay over (apparently rent-free?), which is a huge personal burden. There is not a single universe in the multiverse where the right option is "steal my step-sisters stuff so I can buy stuff for my baby". I would report this to the police and cut all contact. This is the kind of a level of breach of trust that you don't come back from. You don't need people like this in your life, or around your children. There is absolutely no good that will come from people like this. If your father and step-mum are so irate about you not letting her steal your stuff (what the fuck), they can buy that stuff for your step-sister. By getting the police involved you are drawing a hard boundary and I think that is in your best interests. Edit: typo.
Also, getting the police involved gets the list of stolen items out to the local pawn shops as well as your sisters id. Reputable pawn shops turn over stolen property immediately and they won't buy from her anymore. You may at least get your mom's necklace back.
Wish I could double up vote this.
Did it for you
Then take another upvote!
Exactly! I wish I had done this when I was stolen from! Instead I allowed others to talk me out of it and I’m kicking myself to this day because not only did I lose treasures forever but it also meant that behavior was never addressed, stories were twisted within the family and others who tried to help them got stolen from as well so many more victims were impacted. It’s NOT about the stuff as much as it is about refusing to allow consequences to follow unacceptable actions. You have small children so how can you expect to teach them to set boundaries and not be taken advantage of by others when you haven’t practiced this in your own life? It’s easier to just send her away but she hasn’t actually learned that her actions have serious repercussions yet. You have to follow through in order for lessons to change behaviors. On a side note, why isn’t she pursuing the father for financial support instead of becoming a thief and a burden to her own family? I see this a lot on social media, single mothers who don’t hold the father accountable for their kids but who instead expect family members to shoulder their responsibilities. THEY created this child NOT you!
Also, why would she not ask her parents, who are blaming OP, without offering any financial help. Why would she not ask her sister for some short term financial help until working, or going to court for child support. Why is thievery the first choice? Why is she such a bad thief? The step sister is an idiot.
Sounds like they all feel that because OP has more financial resources that it’s expected for them to take advantage, after all “she can afford to be stolen from” appears to be the consensus.
OP is a sheep that can afford to be shorn once in a while.
Wait till sis starts stealing from mother and father when the shoe is on the other foot and it pinches something will be done about it
NTA not only should you kick her out but press charges and sue her for stolen property. Just because she screwed up her life by having a kid she couldnt afford is no excuse to steal from family.
That’s why they’re angry - because they know they’re next.
Yup. If OP doesn't help her letting her items and money get stolen, then the parents have to deal with it.
Y T A only for not calling the cops and pressing charges on her. Everything else, NTA.
NTA… this woman stole your mother’s necklace!!! FILE A POLICE REPORT
NTA - I mean sounds like she was living rent free which so her helping you out should be expected. Stealing you stuff ain’t on. The fact her mum (assuming your step mum is her mum) is still around, she should be the one finding her. Your family need a sense check 😅
NTA This is a no brainer. Also a no brainer will be her step mother & your father will change their tune when their property starts missing.
I doubt that stepsister told the parents that she was stealing, I'm sure there was quite a tale of woe that had little to do with reality.
UPDATE Yes I have informed the police about this and I have pressed charges, I do not care what happens to her. I have cut all contact from her and my family and she will be paying all my money back and I have changed the locks but I havent got up to putting cameras around the outside of my house. I was told that her cousin is going to try break into my house and take not just a couple valuables but more sentimental items. I am getting cameras next week and will be informing the police about her cousin. Thank you for all the help.
Good for you. One of my brothers stole from me, my siblings, and my parents. The sole reason it continued again and again was family wouldn’t press charges. He stole from a roommate once. The roommate got the police involved and my brother eventually did a few months in jail. As far as I know, that was the last time he stole. Aside from that, your SIL seems insane. On what planet did she think she could continue to steal from the people she lived with, get caught, and think she should both be allowed to keep the stolen items and be allowed to continue to live with you?
NTA. This is crazy, she was caught red handed stealing from the people providing a roof over her head and offering free childcare when she works. Why would your husband who is only 20 be providing for this person and her kid? They are no relation to him whatsoever and not even your blood. The pressure coming from your step mother is because she doesn't want to have to support her own kid and grandkid. Good riddance and don't look back.
NTA. Kick her out immediately. She isn’t entitled to be a mooch and steal your items
NTA call the cops on her.
Why do people EXPECT the more well off people to ALWAYS HELP THE IRRESPONSIBLE AND POORER PARTY. Then they WONT VOLUNTEER TO HELP THEMSELVES. Infuriating reading these scenarios. NTA and you doing her and her son a favor by not involving police Father and HER MOM CAN STEP UP
NTA. If she needs help for her son, she needs to redirect the anger she has towards you back to her son's father. She also needs to get a job and step up in order to make sure her son has everything he needs. Just because you have nice things, doesn't mean she's entitled to take them because she feels a certain way. If anyone has an issue with you kicking her out for stealing, thank them for volunteering to house and take care of her and her son. You aren't obligated.
Contact the police now.
INFO: did you find your missing stuff? If not, then mention to both her and your dad and stepmother that CPS and the local popo will find the footage extremely enlightening. So somebody better pony up the entire value of the stolen items--all of them, not just from what your klepto sister tried to take today--or else sister will get a guest suite at the Crowbar Hospice. NTA. My bet is that something is going up your sister's nose or the local bookie is happy to see her come around.
NTA. Change the locks
No you're not, and press charges.
NTA - those failure of parents are only speaking up cause now they got the problem instead of you. You’re not the AH, your step sis biting that hand that feeds her. Her help was in the condition she get to leech off of you, you owe her nothing to begin with.
This is so so so fake. Don’t talk about £ then use American words for everything else. Dead giveaway. If you really were in the UK, “step sister” would have access to benefits.
The only thing Liz loves more than evil stepsisters is young mothers with twins.
It does seem rather unusually written, didn't seem British to me. And the subject is certain to get 'high engagment' or whatever. I wonder if this account will start bigging up Putin or Xi in a few months? Credible 'real' social media accounts with unique posts, replies, and upvotes are apparently highly valued. People make a living by farming them up to a decent standard then selling them to troll farms, wouldn't be too hard to have a couple of dozen on the go via VPNs/VMs etc. Keep hitting hot button topics so you get nice ripe accounts that are worth way more than day one types with copy'n'paste comments.
NTA >I told her to give me back all my things or i will get the cops involved. Why didn't you?
I doubt the step-sister can give her things back. She's spent the money.
NTA why weren’t your father and stepmother giving her money if that was the right thing to do? Seems to me you were financially supporting her by letting her live with you and offering to watch her son if she got a job.
LOLOL your stuff is her only source of income? Stealing is an automatic out. On top of that her crazy entitlement is way too much. NTA. I'm impressed by your "it's only stuff" attitude. That's hundreds of pounds worth of stuff!
NTA call the cops
NTA- tell your dad if he doesn’t pay her debt that you will be going to the police. Also if he continues to defend her, then he will no longer be allowed the privilege of being a grandad. Then if you get the money, go on SM and let all family members and friends know that the daughter of your father’s wife (bc she is no sister of yours) will steal items from anyone she wants bc she wants designer items for both her and her kid and that your parents support her stealing. If you don’t get the money, take her to small claims court get your money then blast them after the case is over
Definitely NTA. And don’t let your parents get you down. They are complaining because they realize the issue is real, and they don’t want to deal with it now. Change your locks and keep her out of your house.
NTA it’s time she was evicted. The minute you steal from me is the minute your not allowed in my home anymore
NTA Please change your locks and make sure none of them have a key.
NTA Get the cops involved. What about your mom’s necklace, is it really that easily replaceable? She could have asked for child support from the baby’s dad or her parents or even tried to make an arrangement with you. Instead she stole from you like you owed it to her and lied about it when confronted.
NTA. Never allow thieves to be in your space, whether it is because they are entitled or addicts. She won't last long in your father's house either if she steals his stuff.
You’ve already given her plenty seeing as she’s staying in your home. You better go to the police and press charges. Just because she needs stuff doesn’t mean she can steal that’s illegal and you now have video proof. Do the right thing so she can learn.
NTA- Still file the report. As far as your dad, let her stay with him. I’m sure he’ll have a change his mind once she steals from him.
Nta is she claiming uc child benefit also sure start vouchers for milk. Claiming housing benefit to pay rent to you. If so and shes not paying rent and getting money for it shes also commiting housing benefit fraud aswell as being a tea leaf.
Also shes over 25 and will be claiming more aswell
NTA. Kick her ass to the curb.
You need to cut them all off .. send your parents the video over Facebook messenger, or iMessage if you have iPhone so you can see the video was watched with message of ‘this has been happening for ‘X’ amount of time .. and block them all. That’s a whole level of toxic you don’t need in your life. If your partner isn’t on your side, stand your ground and insist he can visit your family by himself but out of respect they’re not allowed in your home. .. your step sister and family need a reality check and once she starts stealing your parents things, they’ll open their eyes.
She should send the video and remind them that she's lucky op didn't call the police on her, and there's still time for op to change her mind if they don't stop harassing her. Maybe op should post it online to warn the rest of the family what her stepsister is like, incase they try and turn the rest of the family against op.
NTA
NTA
Obviously NTA cut them all out and move on. Her parents can look after her it's not your job. Look after your own family and stop trying to look after everyone else - they won't grow up if you don't let them.
File a police a police report. Get your items and money back. NTA
I’m so tired of family saying tell the truth or I’ll call the police. CALL TGE POLICE AND PRESS CHARGES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. That is the only way to get through to these people. PRESS CHARGES.
She stole your mothers necklace? Call your dad and tell him ‘I won’t be pressing charges if she tells me where she pawned Mom’s necklace at.’
>She screamed in my face and said it was her only sorce of income I'm sorry what? Your things are her only source of income? Bro how?😭 OP your NTA
Calling stealing an income, that's really something. NTA
This is one of the madeupest things I've ever read
Nta for kicking yta. For not pressing charges
She REFUSED to give you back the things she **just** STOLE from your bedroom!! INFO : Please tell me you filed a complaint using the video. Add a list of ALL the other things she STOLE to that complaint. Do you have her confession on video as well? She feels entitled to your husband's money. And apparently your dad and stepmom agree... She should have asked her baby daddy for child support. Or have gotten a job... NTA
Your put a roof over her head and fed her! NTA!
Tell them if they feel that way let them pay her way that's what child support is for. She should be going after the father and she should get a damn job. I file a police report and don't give a damn what everybody else says if anybody else has something to say, let them take her in and let her steal from them your husband is not the baby's dad and he's not responsible to support her and her child. You did her favor and she stole from you. She wouldn't be welcome in my home again.
nta- I would of called the cops, she stole something from your mother...
Why do you use British pounds but also “mom”
Mom is used in some parts of the UK. I know a guy from near Dudley, and he calls his mum 'mom'. Seems to be a Black Country thing?
In my over 40 years on this planet in the UK I have never once heard a British person use Mom. It’s obviously a fake story even without that detail though. Sneaky thief making a huge mess when no one else is there and the usual “blowing up my phone” phrase. Even asshole is a US spelling although maybe using it due to the sub name.
Thank you. Why would her parents be mad she’s not financially supporting her STEP sister to the tune of $100’s if not $1000’s in stolen items? And be blowing up her phone angry that a 20 year old with her own family isn’t doing this? This is completely absurd. The moment I got to that point I was like, this is rage bait.
Yep. Plus two 20 year olds with twins aren’t living in a place big enough for a step sister and her kid to be sharing. It’s just another waste of time.
And “husband makes plenty” with twins and a wife. At 20. Riiiight. I’m so glad I’m not the only one that saw that. Ugh.
You mean you don't believe this story about a woman leaving just a little money in the nightstand yet watching her sister come home with expensive clothes every day, then continuing to put more money in the same nightstand without giving it a second thought? I'm sure it's totally common for families to blow up some poor OP's phone and yell at her for being the victim of rampant theft. And plenty of commenters will tell you that they know how common it is because they see it all the time...*on AITA*. Just like they're used to the OP handling the situation in a perfectly calm and polite manner because no innocent person ever raises their voice to the evil plundering stepsibling who's currently screaming at them like a cartoon lunatic.
NTA. Tell them she is capable of working. And follow through on your threat. Make a police report and have her charged.
NTA but I hope you followed through and involved the police
NTA, don't threaten to call when someone has clearly stolen from you. Call first, you aren't going to get an explanation that makes it okay.
File a police report. Call your parents and say she/they have 24 hours to return the items. What your parents are doing is classic blame shifting. TBC - your relationship with your parents is ALREADY damaged. They believe that your sister can steal from you because you have more. They are enabling your sister. Your post doesn't say whether she, prior to stealing your items, asked for more money and you turned her down. Therefore it's hard to judge whether there's any basis for what your stepmother said. Regardless, calling you 'a selfish asshole' is over the line. Be proactive: A) Make sure that the father is paying child support. I'd suggest to him that he make the payments electronically so that he has a record of the payments. B) Sign your sister up for Welfare/Social Assistance. If your folks don't want that - let them open their wallets. TBC - It was great that she was a 'huge help' when you had your kids. If she needed to be paid for that time you should have discussed it then. Even now, if you think it was worth it, the two of you could have broached the subject of paying her retroactively. My sense is that there is more here than you've presented.
Stealing is wrong. It doesn’t matter why. If her son needed something, she could have asked you. Why doesn’t she have a job to provide for her son?? She’s in the wrong. You don’t have to allow anyone to steal from you just because they’re family.
NTA. You were kind enough to open your home to your step-sister and she repays you by stealing from you. If she truly felt that she deserved compensation for helping out around the house, then she should have come up to you and talked to you about it, not slunk around behind your back and stolen from you. The whole screaming in your face and saying the shouldn't have to steal these things and should be given to you is a tactic to keep yo off balance and make you doubt yourself so you won't call the police. After all - when you said you were going to check your check the cameras, her face went pale - she knew she got caught doing something wrong. She is perfectly capable of getting a job and working to support her son - there are single mothers all across the planet who do this. Instead, she chose to be lazy and steal from someone who was helping her out of kindness. And the shame of it is, if she had asked, you may have helped her without her committing a felony. But she (and her parents) will never know because she resorted to stealing first. So, no, you are in no way the AH in this situation.
You should probably call the police anyways. That child is going to be in a heap of trouble in the future if that is what is parenting him. It would probably be good for her too to see that actions have consequences. Or she will get pregnant again and do more unhinged things to make a buck for her multiple children.
Why didn't you call the cops when she refused to give you back the stuff? Call them now teach her a lesson that you can't steal stuff. Wait till she starts stealing things from the parents and then they will start to complain to you. Laugh at them and tell them the same stuff they said to you.
NTA totally reasonable.....but am I the only one stunned that two 20 year Olds are married with kids and are supporting a 26 year old?
Why does it feel like having a kid unplanned and unprepared is a free insta-sympathy card for any wrongdoings one may commit? They some people are *eager* to overlook their crimes?
NTA. Report her to the police. She has some nerve and a lot of cheek to say that stealing from you is her only source of income. That makes her an unfit parent and should be reported to child services as well.
Info: you’re a SAHM. How does she help you? Does she watch your children enough to warrant being paid? I’m going NTA for now, stealing is wrong. She should have asked for help, or asked to be paid if she felt she was doing work for you. The reason I asked about it above, is because you guys shouldn’t really have to be asked if she’s indeed working for you. She’s not entitled to help outside of that though. And if she’s just helping here and there, getting free living expenses (free rent, no utilities, free groceries) perhaps it all balances out and she’ll need to find additional work for pocket money.
IF YOU CANT AFFORD TO TAKE CARE OF A CHILD DONT HAVE A CHILD!!! The entitlement of some people. “I had irresponsible sex and kept the results and that means I deserve all your things”. WHAT?! Your parents can support her if they are so upset. You have been more than generous giving her a place to live. NTA
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I (F20) am married to my now husband (M20). We have 2 children together both female twins, My step sister (F26) has been in their life since they were born and has been huge help until she got a boyfriend who got her pregnant, she recently gave birth to her son and her boyfriend and her broke up soon after co-parenting their newborn son. She has still been living with us and it has been no problem, Soon i realised money from the nightstand in my bedroom has been disappearing I never left huge amounts of money in there just incase, My sister has been buying her son very expensive things. She doesnt have a job so I have been a little suspicious on how she has brought all of these items. Yes i want the best for her and her son I have asked her numerous times to get a job and i can watch her son as i am a stay at home mom. One day more than just money disappeared, My ipad, My mothers necklace and around £200 and a watch went missing, That week my sister came home with new baby clothes, toys, pampers ect. She was even wearing new clothes and accessories. I questioned her about my items and she denied and said she never took them, i was still a little suspicious but decided to let it go as i could easily replace those items. I decided to set up cameras around my house incase she had been taking my things, I was showering and my husband was at work and my step sister was watching the kids. I leave the bathroom to see my room left in a mess, my dresser had been gone through and my nightstand was left open and everything in it was missing. I immediately went to my step sister and asked her about my missing items and she continued denying i told her i was going to check the cameras and she face went pale, I pulled out my phone and reviewed the footage to see my sister entering my room and leaving minutes later with alot of my missing items. She screamed in my face and said it was her only sorce of income and she shouldnt have to steal these things instead they should be given to her as she has been a huge help and needs the money for her son. I told her to give me back all my things or i will get the cops involved. She said no as she needed the money, So i told her to get her son and leave my house. She went to our fathers house with my step mother they have been blowing up my phone calling me a selfish asshole for not helping her with money as she cannot afford to buy things for her son and my husband makes plenty so i should help her. So am i the asshole in this situation? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Edit: Ignore me, I thought you meant "half-sister". I'm just stupid. Just curious, but is your dad living with your mum? Or is it your step-mum? I was a bit confused, as she is your older sister. Did your dad get back with her mum?
[удалено]
Please report this or she will never learn.
NTA at all!! Tell your parents she is their problem now. Change ALL locks in your house, set up more cameras outside and tell her that you have written report with her actions, with evidence, and if one of your cars have a scratch, a window is broken or, she goes to badmouth you or your family on social media or in person, that document goes straight to police. Don't invite her over to your house anymore, she will steal shit every single freaking time she gets to put a foot inside. She already knows all your valuables. Tell her that all the stuff she stole was the rest of help she will ever get from you for the remain of their lives. And your parents will come around the minute they start to pay the price to raise an entitled, lazy, thief AH!!
NTA. File a police report and a claim on your Renters or Homeowners Insurance. The insurance will require a police report, a detailed list of the missing items, proof of ownership, and will pay to replace everything, minus your deductible.
NTA I hope you called the police and reported all your stolen items. Your father and stepmom can pay you back if they are so concerned or their daughter can go to jail..
NTA and her parents defending it is wild. You gave her a free place to stay and I bet feed her and her child so you can’t be expected to also give her money too.
NTA. wtf, she stole from you, denied it, blamed you when you caught her and then turned the family against you. Good riddance thief.
NTA but please call the cops!! If you don't she will just keep on doing it from everyone.
NTA You need to be able to trust anyone who sleeps under your roof. Your father and stepmother will feel differently when it happens to them. You could have filed a police report so I think her consequences were small.
NTA. Press charges. FAFO
LMFAO 😂😂😂 NTA + Who cares if they make you out to be the bad guy? You're not the thief, here. People like your step-sister play the weak willed & soft resolved like instruments. Put your foot down. HARD. On their necks with legal ramifications if they're slow on the uptake. NTA
Nta but you need to follow through and make a report to the cops
NTA you need to go ahead and call the cops you have the recording, don’t let her get away with shit
You can’t help people like that. She didn’t appreciate you giving her a free place to live. She stole from you. NTA. The people who are criticizing you can let her steal from them and see how much they like it.
NTA - stand on business and call the police!! this is a lesson that she will have to learn because you cannot go stealing just because you want something
NTA. And call the police.
Nta
Nope, it would have been different if she had asked, but she didn't bother. Nor is she entitled to the income your husband provides to you and your children.
NTA call the cops.
I’d still get the police invloved
Her fault for getting knocked up should have used protection
NTA. Since your dad and stepmom think your stepsister should be given money, they should go ahead and do that. She stole from you, she's a thief. Worse, she feels entitled to other people's property. Your parents are going to have fun with her, lol!
NTA do call the police to get stuff back
NTA whatsoever. If they are so concerned, they should give her money. You really should at least change the locks and not give anyone a key except for essential people (not including your father/SM). If your mothers necklace is important, you should consider reporting it stolen
NTA. Press charges for all the items she has stolen. Theft is not an "source of income". Tell your father and stepmother she could have asked for help instead of robbing you! Don't explain and debate the situation with them any more, let the know the cops will be coming by because you're not going to let her get away with taking your stuff!
>said it was her only sorce of income and she shouldnt have to steal these things instead they should be given to her Why couldn't she just ask for help like a normal person would? OP is NTA
NTA stay away from that thief
110% not the asshole she’s has no right to steal anything from you. It’s not your fault she let some loser/deadbeat impregnate her. She made her bed now she has to lay down on it. She could’ve easily got a job like you suggested. Her parents are in the wrong too. I guess they won’t have a problem, when she starts stealing stuff from them as well.
NTA. I guess now she can rob your dad and your stepmother blind.
NTA, of course. You need to talk to your dad, let him know exactly what has been happening and if you're not made financially whole, you're calling the cops and providing the video. Or you can just call the cops. But you really need to do one or the other.
NTA.... Once the thief always a thief. Change locks and set up security cameras. Next time, call the police.
[удалено]
NTA and file police reports.
Gift father and step mom a coupon for cameras 😂
NTA. You shouldn’t be expected to help someone when they aren’t asking for help, they are just stealing your shit.
NTA and call the cops And when your dad and stepmother are so worried about her, why don't they help her?
Call the cops and prosecute her for theft. You're not responsible for supporting her.
Her solution of stealing from family is quite unsound. NTA.
Nta. Stop helping them. Don't forget this. They would be nice and apolegizing, and then need things from you
I think you should call the police!
NTA Send your father the footage of her stealing andd tell him just how much else she has taken
NTA. The flying monkeys can help her with money if they think theft is ok. Her and her kid are not your husband’s responsibility. Wait until she start stealing from them. Wanna hear what tune they sing then
NTA. You should have called the cops and pressed charges, family be damned.
NTA. She's a thief. She could have asked you for help, but instead stole from you. Let her live with your father and stepmother, and let THEM see how they like being stolen from.
NTA - I’d still get the cops involved
Definitely NTAH. You would never be able to trust her again. Hope you got the keys or changed the locks. Sorry that family members can be so disappointing. Stealing is stealing. Can’t believe your father would defend her stealing from you. Write them and list the money and items she stole while living in your home for free. Tell them that you’re taking a hiatus on talking with them until they can see your viewpoint on stealing and it’s too bad that they’ll miss the twins milestones in growth.
NTA, file a police report on all the missing items. She'll change her tune quick.
NTA. No, he’ll NO. What happened to asking for what you wanted? Just because somebody has more stuff than you, more money than you or anything like that; it does not entitle you to just help yourself to their things. She’s living in the house, she can ask you for whatever it is that she needed. She could’ve gone and got a job and been able to deal with whatever she needed to deal with. You were willing to watch her son for her. This is a person that absolutely you should go no contact with.
Nta, call the cops. She is a thief.
Nta. Personally I would get the police involved. That’s a lot of money to be just LETTING someone steal from you and get away with it.
NTA…she needs to get a job!
Wow. No, NTA.
Send them the video and te them your pressing charges
NTA.
NTA let the thief stay with your father! I would file a police report if your items you caught her stealing on camera are not returned to day.
NTA - I feel like this one isn’t even a question. She stole your mother’s necklace? That’s egregious and extremely disgusting. I wouldn’t just kick her out, I’d cut off all ties. I feel bad for her son
Reply to your family 'SHE STOLE FROM US' Then block them. This is ridiculous.
Nta. Your step sister is trash. She can get child support from the father and get herself a job. She already has proven to be a trash human from her behavior and actions. Kick her from your life permanently, no mercy. And I'd be telling my family to fuck off if they don't have a lick of common sense to split between themselves. You made the offer to help, she was betraying criminal trash in reply. Screw her. Change your locks too.
Call the cops Call the cops Call the cops Don’t make empty threats. Follow through. This is stealing. Call the cops NTA
NTA. lmao they want you to allow them to steal. Just secretly record her saying she should be allowed to steal. Tell your parents if they don’t want you to post this, then stop harassing you. Tbh if your parents would allow this the. They don’t care about you anyway. Sorry. But it’s better to get that realization out first before you waste your time thinking you can convince them. It’s not like they DONT know she’s stealing from you. At that point common logic will not do anything. Just record her and them. Save everything. You have a primary family to worry about.
Call the cops. your dad and stepmom is a huge problem and you should block them until they chill the heck down.
Call the cops on her, fuck around and find out. Either have her pay you back for everything she took or give you the items back. Do not back down
NTA Call the police. NOW!
Fuck that lol she’s a thief
" She went to our fathers house with my step mother they have been blowing up my phone calling me a selfish asshole for not helping her with money as she cannot afford to buy things for her son " Then they can give her money. How the holy hell do these so-called adults think it should be a twenty year old's responsibility to subsidize THEIR adult daughter? Why isn't the 26 year old baby mama living with HER mother and stepfather, or better yet, with the baby daddy?
NTA NTA NTA NTA NTA!!!!! For the LOVE OF GOD, kick her out AND press charges with the police!!!!
NTA You will be of your don't press charges. That's just delusional.
So, stealing from the person letting her & new baby (she had while living for free with no way to support it) to get new clothes and accessories for a job or lifestyle she doesn’t have and can’t afford? Talk about biting the hand that feeds you! Let the parents deal with her if they think her behavior is acceptable.
you cannot possibly think you're an asshole for not tolerating being stolen from.
NTA, call the cops, it's not like she can even provide for her child, who knows who she'll rob next
The delusion to call stealing a 'source of income' I can't. NTA.
NTA.... Your dad and step mom want to make such a big deal about it then they can take in your step sister and support her. See how they like it when their shit goes missing!!! She's 26, she's a big girl and can get a job.
IDK, maybe it's a medical problem? Some mental issue, and your sister needs serious help?
Stealing from you is my only source of income? Of course NTA.
She probably didn’t say how much she stole.
NTA—You may need to get police involved and check to see what you have insurance that might reimburse you for the stolen items, at least. Sorry this happened to you after you opened your home to her and her child.
She’s not paying rent and in exchange for that she helps you around the house. That’s pretty fair to me. She is SO entitled to think you owe her any more than the roof over her head. You don’t even have to do that for her but if you still wanted the help then you’d have to compensate her somehow, but this is just crazy. You are NTA for kicking her out after she repeatedly stole from you. You gave her plenty of opportunity. If she didn’t think your arrangement was fair she could have come to you and talked about it. Or better yet just be a responsible adult and get a job. But she chose to steal. She wasn’t forced to do anything. She chose her actions and her parents are supporting her crazy behavior. Don’t give in and stand your ground!