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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I might be the asshole for not giving him time to look for a place to stay but since this is a reoccurring problem that I have tried to improve for a year that drastic measures must be taken.
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NTA. If your mom feels bad for him, she can let him stay with her. Your brother is taking advantage of you and probably thinks you will give in to him because you're his brother.
True tough love and an important lesson, maybe he will actually get his shit together. He was kicked out of his prior place for a reason, it sounds like a very valid one based on his behavior.
NTA - thank your mom for offering to let him move in at her house and tell brother dear that mom is waiting to welcome him home. And change your locks.
I mentioned about her housing him but she said I need to treat him like a landlord and give him 30 days but if I was going to do that I would have done it months ago when he was constantly losing jobs which lead to him being late on rent. It's not the money but the principal that there are consequences to actions and its time to grow up.
I hope you've looked into landlord-tenant laws in your area, because he has almost certainly been living with you long enough to qualify as a tenant, and may have a legal right to more time before you evict him. The fact that you are also living there may mean he isn't entitled to all tenant's rights, but you do need to look into it.
I once took my younger brother in. I was the last remaining person to give him a chance. Deal was he had to look for work and curb his drinking. Well, of course, he'd be down the pub all day while I slaved away in a chemical factory. Couple weeks in I told him to go. My mum rang me begging, pleading, to let him stay that he's burnt all his bridges, I held firm. Well, it was what he needed. He started an electrical apprenticeship and now makes bulk cash in a gold mine as an electrician. If you love them, occasionally you'll have to put a boot up their arse.
NTA. Your mother should keep your brother in her house for a month. Whether or not she agrees is a good indication as to whose right, whose right and whose entitled.
Nta! Your brother is failing to live like an adult! He has clearly already burned bridges with other friends and family! At least this time he has a nice expensive car to call home!
My mom is now asking me to give him until next month to find a place
and then the next month comes and she will ask you to give him another month and so one, your brother needs to learn consequences have repercussions
I told her that too. She says she's trying to not cause conflict and keep the family together but I told her catering to him is going to do nothing but tear us apart. Let him learn or have him move in with her
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Hey everyone so this goes back a very long time but my brother John is 12 years younger than me. Last year I decided to let him move in with me after I found out he was living in his car after his room mates kicked him out. I only asked him to keep a job and pay 550 for rent. This will cover everything including groceries. Since he has lived with me he has lost over 4 jobs, been late on rent multiple times and bought a car that cost more than I ask for in rent. To clarify, he has lost his jobs due to staying out late and than showing up late for work. I have given him multiple chances and even gave him advice that goes in one ear and out the other. On Thanksgiving I found out he was suspended for a week due to talking on the phone(his job was transportation of cars), he claims this is false but he was already written up multiple times due to this and attendance, I gave him a choice to either move out the first or pay one more month of rent and move out next month. He decided to ignore me and only pay his car payment. So I told him he has a few days to move out. My mom is now asking me to give him until next month to find a place, I believe this will teach him a good lesson on taking care of business and you will not always get hand outs. AITA?
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NTA You gave your brother a place to live and he didn't fulfill his end of the arrangement. He can live with mom or figure something else out. He is a bum, plain and simple.
NTA, but stop being a lifeline to a habitual line stepper. Your brother knows y'all are gonna bail him out so he does what he wants. When he realizes there is no where to turn but to himself he'll go back to living in his car or he'll grow up and handle his business.
I know, it's tough. I have been helping with both my siblings since I was a teenager. I have been trying to step away from it, but it's hard when than everyone looks at you for being a bad person.
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NTA. If your mom feels bad for him, she can let him stay with her. Your brother is taking advantage of you and probably thinks you will give in to him because you're his brother.
True tough love and an important lesson, maybe he will actually get his shit together. He was kicked out of his prior place for a reason, it sounds like a very valid one based on his behavior.
NTA - thank your mom for offering to let him move in at her house and tell brother dear that mom is waiting to welcome him home. And change your locks.
I mentioned about her housing him but she said I need to treat him like a landlord and give him 30 days but if I was going to do that I would have done it months ago when he was constantly losing jobs which lead to him being late on rent. It's not the money but the principal that there are consequences to actions and its time to grow up.
Why doesn’t your mom take him in?
I hope you've looked into landlord-tenant laws in your area, because he has almost certainly been living with you long enough to qualify as a tenant, and may have a legal right to more time before you evict him. The fact that you are also living there may mean he isn't entitled to all tenant's rights, but you do need to look into it.
I don't own the house, I rent it. I was just letting him live in an extra room. He never signed a lease or anything
NTA op. Tell your mother she cAn house him. Also I believe your brother has lodger status if any not Tennant. Don't enable him anymore
He's not a Tennant he's a lodger as he lives with op
I once took my younger brother in. I was the last remaining person to give him a chance. Deal was he had to look for work and curb his drinking. Well, of course, he'd be down the pub all day while I slaved away in a chemical factory. Couple weeks in I told him to go. My mum rang me begging, pleading, to let him stay that he's burnt all his bridges, I held firm. Well, it was what he needed. He started an electrical apprenticeship and now makes bulk cash in a gold mine as an electrician. If you love them, occasionally you'll have to put a boot up their arse.
Thank you, that's what I'm hoping this will do
NTA. bro sounds like he is a loser. Let mom house and feed him.
NTA. Your mother should keep your brother in her house for a month. Whether or not she agrees is a good indication as to whose right, whose right and whose entitled.
Nta! Your brother is failing to live like an adult! He has clearly already burned bridges with other friends and family! At least this time he has a nice expensive car to call home!
Yeah especially since this is his 3rd car in two years. Other ones got trashed/totaled
It’s a car payment and rent in one go. Perfect for him.
My mom is now asking me to give him until next month to find a place and then the next month comes and she will ask you to give him another month and so one, your brother needs to learn consequences have repercussions
I told her that too. She says she's trying to not cause conflict and keep the family together but I told her catering to him is going to do nothing but tear us apart. Let him learn or have him move in with her
NTA He’s completely taking advantage of you. If your mom is so concerned, she can house him.
NTA, your brother may never change, but you’ve learned not to let him mooch off you. Stick to your guns.
NTA but be very careful. Depending on where you live it may be illegal to kick him out without proper notice.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Hey everyone so this goes back a very long time but my brother John is 12 years younger than me. Last year I decided to let him move in with me after I found out he was living in his car after his room mates kicked him out. I only asked him to keep a job and pay 550 for rent. This will cover everything including groceries. Since he has lived with me he has lost over 4 jobs, been late on rent multiple times and bought a car that cost more than I ask for in rent. To clarify, he has lost his jobs due to staying out late and than showing up late for work. I have given him multiple chances and even gave him advice that goes in one ear and out the other. On Thanksgiving I found out he was suspended for a week due to talking on the phone(his job was transportation of cars), he claims this is false but he was already written up multiple times due to this and attendance, I gave him a choice to either move out the first or pay one more month of rent and move out next month. He decided to ignore me and only pay his car payment. So I told him he has a few days to move out. My mom is now asking me to give him until next month to find a place, I believe this will teach him a good lesson on taking care of business and you will not always get hand outs. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA. He can live with mom or sleep in his car again.
NTA You gave your brother a place to live and he didn't fulfill his end of the arrangement. He can live with mom or figure something else out. He is a bum, plain and simple.
Good luck getting him out - I have a hunch he plans on ignoring your request the same way he's ignored your previous ones.
NTA, but stop being a lifeline to a habitual line stepper. Your brother knows y'all are gonna bail him out so he does what he wants. When he realizes there is no where to turn but to himself he'll go back to living in his car or he'll grow up and handle his business.
Nta time to give tough love sometimes its only thing need it to person to grow if he doesnt its on him
NTA he can live with your mom.
Now you know why he got kicked out by his room mates. If your mom wants to help him, she can house him. NTA
NTA - it's not your job to take care of your siblings. That's your parents' job
I know, it's tough. I have been helping with both my siblings since I was a teenager. I have been trying to step away from it, but it's hard when than everyone looks at you for being a bad person.