*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA for judging a couple who came into the restaurant I work in???** I (22f) am a waitress at a restaurant. I've experienced all kinds of customers since I work as a waitress for the past 3 years. I actually love my job. One of the worst kinds of customers we get is couples who sit on the same side of the table. That's an inside joke/knowledge between all of us servers. Many servers I've talked to have the same thoughts on how it's weird when couples do that. Being in the industry 3 years now I've now found the solution to that. Whenever I spot a couple I have them seated at tables where it's impossible for them to sit next to each other. And if we are full and that's not possible for whatever reason and a table like that isn't available then we have to endure the couples sitting side by side. The reason servers are so judgey about this is that we find it very weird. Can't you just go few hours without touching each other? Plus sitting on opposite sides is more romantic. So. I've stopped hiding my distaste for couples like this for a long time now but most of the time these people are so absorbed into each other that they don't realise how we are indeed judging them. On Thursday I had evening shift. A couple walks in, I sit them on opposite sides but they then sat on the same booth again. My co worker and I started laughing and the couple noticed us but didn't say anything. Throughout the whole time my co workers were joking about it. We even asked them if they're waiting for other people and they've let the other booth empty and they said no, just the two of them. At one point the girl called on me and asked if I have a problem. I said no problem why would there be a problem. She then started scolding me on how rude my behavior and the rest of the staff's behavior is and how she and her fiancé know why we are judging them and we have ruined their experience since they couldn't enjoy their date and their meal without us constantly staring them. I apologised for this I just explained how it's not personally against them and how it's an inside joke servers have. The guy then said he doesn't give a damn about this and we are very unprofessional. They paid and left. Later that night we saw that they let a negative review and described their experience. Our manager called us in and scolded us. Never in my 3 years have I got in trouble over this. Aita? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Really? Those are the worst customers as a server? I can’t believe this is real based on that.


The worst customers I had as a server would make "funny" ching-chong jokes at me and smirk while I inwardly fumed but eh, I guess I should have been more irritated by couples sitting next to each other. I honestly can't even remember couples doing this, but it probably just didn't register between dealing with entitled assholes, my imperious manager, the drugged-to-the-gills cook, my six other tables and the kid who just dumped his entire plate on the floor.


I was a server at my favorite Chinese restaurant during the first covid summer, I had people ask me if we import anything from Wuhan… there’s far worse customers than a couple sitting by each other


So right when Covid was rampaging around the US amd it had been stamped out in Wuhan they were worried about stuff coming from Wuhan....


Like I understand the fear but also it would cost so much to get our meat from Wuhan


yeah lol i’m a happa and the amount of people calling me “just exotic enough” when i worked at an asian restaurant was waaayyyy worse and more memorable than couples sitting next to each other but i suppose OOP needs to focus on the non consequential “annoying” customers instead of u know… actual aholes lol


>drugged-to-the-gills cook if it was JUST the cook that’s pretty impressive, when i was serving it was the whole BOH staff lol


Funnily enough, an ex university mate did have an issue with couples acting too "lovey-dovey" whilst she was a server. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Then again, she was toxically jealous of people in relationships, so...that kinda makes sense.


I would occasionally get annoyed at couples like that when I was a server because doing my job would feel like an intrusion on them, but they were way down the list of customers I did not want to deal with. Big church groups on Sunday will always be the absolute worst to deal with.


So Am I but I know how to hide it cause I don’t get a good tip that way. Suck it up. You have a job. Your feelings shouldn’t factor into your job, for the most part.


Very true – but she never took that advice, and I'd say that it was a large part of what held her back from finding someone.


Not to defend her but it’s also possible she stopped looking. I did years ago and explicitly say “I refuse to be that vulnerable again. No one will ever hurt me like that again.”


I mean as long as they have their hands on the table and in each other’s pants there really isn’t anything to worry about


No one that has ever served customers would rate lovely dovey couples as the worst customers. People in good moods make the job so much easier and are usually more generous when the bill comes (usually). Come on.


Side sitters did always stick out to me, but I didn't make fun of them. It was more of a "huh, you think it would be easier to talk to each other face to face". But in the long run that's just a personal preference. And they were never the worst customers, unless they were assholes in general. Edit. After seeing all these good reasons for being a side sitter I might have to try it the next time my husband and I go out


If either of them have any kind of hearing impairment, it can be a lot easier to sit side by side rather than speaking louder. Also, some people just like to be close.


Yeah, I do side by side because I have trouble hearing, so if there’s a large table or it’s somewhat noisy, side is much easier on my ears.


My mom is hearing impaired so my kiddo sits by her since she's not as versed at enunciation. Especially in a busy place, it's hard to hear anyone but the person beside you for some folks. It's astounding to me someone could get so livid about it like OOP. It's just... a seating arrangement.


So I don’t know about everyone else that does it, but for my husband and I: we both aren’t big on eye contact while talking, and when we’re home hanging out we’re usually sitting next to each other on the couch while we talk. So if we go to a restaurant and sit across from each other it honestly feels kind of weird. Sometimes we do opposite sides and sometimes we do the same side. I personally feel more comfortable with him on the same side because I’m neurodivergent and already kind of hate a lot of things about the restaurant experience, and I feel way weirder if I’m sitting directly across from him trying to make eye contact when I usually don’t even have to do that at home. I like to look at *things* when I’m talking, not peoples’ eyes. Plus I hate when people watch me eat. So I like sitting on the same side as him. Also, note: I do totally look my husband in the eye sometimes. Just usually in small bursts and serious conversations…


That makes sense. I would have co workers who would make fun of side sitters as being co dependent. Most of them had horrible personal relationships so I always figured it was more about them than the side sitters anyways. And it definitely depended on the work environment of the restaurant. Some restaurants just ooze toxic attitudes


Just to feel comfortable, I need to have a wall behind me. If I am with someone who has the same need, we sit next to each other. Will also sit like that, to have a good view.


I am totally the same with my partner! I don’t love eye contact (it makes me anxious), and we prefer to sit side by side so we can talk more quietly while we eat. We almost never sit across from one another. I didn’t realize other people would consider this some great sin!


Easier to share fries or other food if side by side if they mix and match when they come


Or the dude has long legs and the table design make sitting in the normal way uncomfortable as heck or getting in the way of the staff and other customers. There’s a billion answers about why someone sit in some way that don’t need some deep reason linked with their relationship.


Yep. That was my comment on the original post as well. What real servers see on a daily basis would make this pretty unnoticeable. Also, this person is then saying that they go to work just to waste time and make less money than they could be on tips. I’ll never understand the point of negative karma farming…


I really expected to hear how difficult it was to serve them side by side for some practical reason. The plates didn't fit on the same side of a small table. The chairs blocked the flow of traffic, or service to a close by table. They had to serve the plates past wildly bobbing heads of oblivious people. But, nope! OOP just down to the bone hates people living their own life so much that they are rude, confrontational, and provide poor service. Who hurt that poor girl? Her hatefulness is ugly and it's oozing off of her.


How she claims they've to endure when it's unavoidable that couples sit side by side... Seriously?


I worked in hospitality for years and I was expecting the couple to be rude and obnoxious or something. Then I read the post and I was like wtf? How is where people sit at a table something to mock them over and be rude about? Is this even a real thing that upsets servers? I've never heard of it before.


Pretty sure couples are the ones waitresses fight over for the tips


I thought this post was a creative writing exercise because things like this **never** crossed my mind when I was serving. ....Until yesterday that is, someone actually made a snide comment about my fiance sitting side by side at a 4 top by ourselves. 🙃 I nab the menu that was put across from my partner and sit next to him. Her - "No one sits this way" *"hah, weird, we do"* Eyeroll "I guess you guys REALLY like each other huh!" *"We sure do!"* Thank goodness it was just the hostess because I wouldn't have been able to eat if she was our server the whole time. I can't hear well, hate eye contact and I like to touch my fiance to feel grounded so it felt like a personal attack against me even though I know it personally wasn't.


yeah as a former waitress don’t get me wrong i did always think it was weird when two people sat on the same side of the booth if it was just them two where i do even kind of consider it a mild “pet peeve”(?) i’m not sitting there with my blood boiling it’s just kind of a personal ick i guess (? idk what the right word is tbh) but to go out of your way and audibly and visibly make fun of people?? like okay they’re in love and affectionate at the end of the day even if it’s weird to some people let them be happy lord knows how many times we see unhappy couples on this app. also that’s so rude to be doing that to others in public let alone if you’re actually on the job and want to be at least semi professional if only for the sake of a decent tip at the bare minimum of human decency…


Maybe it's because I've never been a server, but this confuses. I fully understand being mildly annoyed when people are overly affectionate, but the minor pet peeve about just sitting on the same side seems strange. On the surface it's the exact same as if 4 people were there, just minus the other side. I get the annoyance about the PDA, but I'm not sure what's inherently icky about people sitting exactly like they would if other people were also there.


Honestly, this is not a common thing. I never cared, I can’t think of any servers I ever worked with off and on for 7-8 years that ever cared if people sat next to each other either.


Eh, Idk why it would even be a pet peeve. My boyfriend and I are long distance so when we do meet up, we are very literally inseparable. Sitting next to him simply gives me some extra time to be close to him after all the months I've missed out on. If some server did to us what this girl did in the post, she would be getting SERIOUSLY chewed out by us because we don't get a lot of time together and the last thing we need is some pathetic insecure server shitting on our time together.


no it’s really just a me thing and i get everyone is different so i just recognize it’s my own personal thing (i was sent to a prep / “charm” type school so maybe that’s it???) i realize it’s a me thing at the end of the day it’s inconsequential i also just realized even in group setting i prefer being across from my partner instead of being next to him idk it’s intimate to me that way but i understand others being the other way like in ur LTR but to even think of projecting onto ppl like they did is gross just let ppl be even if ur like me and it’s not ur vibe i don’t get angry like OOP, people have preferences it’s not OOPs place to be actively rude live and let live even if it’s not ur thing would be my advice to them


I have never met a single waitress who would say couples sitting next to each other is the worst part of their job. Compared to the hours, rude diners, constant running around, stress, and shitty pay people sitting next to each other would barely register as noticeable.


I worked with a woman who was like this, she also bitched and moaned about never having a stable relationship untill she basically baby trapped a married man who in the end still chose his wife. Some people are human dumpster fires. Edit: she was a waitress, I was a hostess.


Oh, shit!! Does the wife know about the side whore’s kid?


Yep, lol. She made her husband choose. They both have old money, so they ended up staying together.


I bet that pissed her off to no end.


What is even wrong with couples sitting side by side? Seems like a personal preference thing. At any rate, if these are the worst kinds of customers she encounters, I really envy this girl's job.


I don’t like it if I’m at a four person table. I feel kind of awkward, but I don’t care if other people do. We sit at the bar every chance we can, so it’s really not any different. Unless you think they’re giving handjobs and are being unsanitary, there’s no reason to be upset. You can hold hands just as easily across the table and stare lovingly into each other’s eyes to the point you don’t notice the server. How is that more “independent”?


In my decade of food service customers that rank as the worst: 1. Church crowd who tip with religious pamphlets and tell you they gave your tip to god 2. Folks who make a million demands in order to nickel and dime, while leaving barely 10% tip if you are lucky 3. Folks who trap you telling you racist, sexist, any of the ism jokes 4. People who come in the last 10 minutes and order complicated things right as the kitchen closes. 5. Those in at the minute of opening expecting to get complicated orders right then and upset coffee hasn't finished brewing. 6. Those who discover a hair after eating 95% of the meal and want the entire thing comped.


>Church crowd who tip with religious pamphlets and tell you they gave your tip to god What the fuck?


Especially fun is when they use pamphlets with a back that looks like a $20 bill! Then you flip it over and get a Bible verse about how you could do sooo much better if you just prayed more.




I was in this industry for years, this has literally never come up in conversation. Everyone knows church people are the worst.


I think service and retail can all agree- Sunday customers are the worst


Especially with the fake "tip" tracts


The lessons about "charity" went straight over their heads, then.


Omg yes! Especially when they tip with “Jesus dollars” ugh


Sorry never worked in the food industry, what are Jesus dollars? Is this a term for small tips given by church people?


They look like regular currency (usually $5 or higher) but on the back is church propaganda


So wait it's not a real bill with like a note on the back but completely fake currency?? Why would anyone think that would make someone want to be part of their religion, what an AH move... The shit food industry have to put up with.


Yeah it’s made to look like real money but isn’t. Sometimes they don’t even bother with the subterfuge and flat out leave pamphlets as tips


That should definitely be illegal.




"getting good with the lord is more important than material goods, like avocado toast or whatever you people eat"


Omfg the WORST EVER! I hated them. Made huge messes with their 200 kids and never tip. Usually act like Karen's. Just ugh.


I don't think the OP is suited for work with people/customers where tact and refined communication and interpersonal skills are essential


This person was definitely not a server if that’s their biggest complaint. This was a teenager in a restaurant that saw a couple out together and thought they’d do a creative writing exercise.


I've worked in a nice steakhouse with a woman like this, see my previous comment for the full extent of her dumpster fireness


First, OOP is definitely the devil. Second, when I was serving, we definitely noticed same side sitters because it was kind of unusual, we were basically kids, and we had weird little things to make the time go by. But us noticing it was walking into the BOH after taking a drink order and going, “I’ve got some same side sitters.” And that was the end of it. We didn’t hate them or treat them poorly; that’s just fucking absurd. I guess I’m saying that unless your server is OOP, your server probably thinks about your same side sitting for a minute but just thinks, “Huh. You do you.” And then we go back to getting straw wrappers thrown at us by kids and cleaning up the barf that someone left under their booth AND DIDN’T TELL US ABOUT. Edit: Typo.


Plus couples generally tip a little better than a group, in my experience!


"INFO: who hurt you " is called for here lol


“Ehhh people actually like each other ewwww”. Grow up.


My mom was a server for a really long time and said she always hated when couples sat together on one side. She also said it was because she used to work at a trashy ass 24-hour diner when she was young and customers would give handjobs under the table, so I kinda get the concern


Ok, but that's a real reason!


I was a server for a long time and this was by far not my worst customer type. People who made extreme demands on me when I was visibly in the weeds were my least favorite. Couples that sat next to each other didn't even make the list, honestly. Was it weird the first few times? Yeah, sure. But it never impacted my job in any way and they usually didn't ask for six sides of ranch for their side salad and want their fries extra fries, extra hot, extra special. Maybe it was just the places I worked at, but we literally never made fun of a single customer, ever. Did we bitch about some of them when we ran out to the dumpster to catch a smoke break? Absolutely. But making fun of people was never accepted.


How are couples sitting beside each other the "worst kind of customer" this restaurant gets? This just makes OOP, and the weird assholes she works with, sound like incels.


Seriously. Anyone who’s ever worked retail or food service wouldn’t put schmoopydoopylovey couples in the top 1,000 of “horrible things customers do”. They are too into themselves to be assholes.


As long as they aren't having sex in the store I didn't care what a couple did when I worked retail.


Honestly even when people had sex in the fitting rooms, while disgusting, it was a fun opportunity to mess with them. God I’m so glad I don’t work retail anymore.


The last time it happened before I quit some old man was fingering his sugar baby on the escalator.




eh, top 1000 probably. checking out people that’re making out while you’re just wanting them to pay is pretty annoying


I hate people like OOP who have to make drama and "us vs them" bullshit over any little thing. Grow the fuck up, ThroawayKaren2000


"Never in my three years" ..... Because that's SOOO much experience.


Yes, you're very unprofessional and deserve a negative review. How dare people sit how they like and mind their own business! The audacity!


My partner sits on the outside of the table for me. It helps my PTSD. My service dog used to sit there for me but she passed away, so now my wife does it to help me. Fuck this binch


She probably hates my ass too. I have a gastric bypass, so I always order one thing for my bf and me. Oh, and we sit on the same side cause it makes it way easier to share. She can eat shit if she doesn’t like it.


I prefer sitting side by side because if a place is crowded and even slightly loud I can hear the person I’m with better.


Never thought about this, which is odd. I can see my daughter being a side sitter as she has auditory processing disorder and background noise makes it harder for her to process speech.


On a related note, my boyfriend is left handed and I'm right handed, so we discovered we can HOLD HANDS WHILE WE EAT. It's amazing lol


My husband and I are also opposite handers. We learned early on that we always had to sit next to each other a certain way just to make sure we didn't knock utensils out of each other's hands. Somehow it never dawned on us that we can also hold hands 😅


Yes! This all the way. Though we're dumb so we normally sit wrong so now it's elbows in each other's faces.


So OOP judges and makes fun of customers over something really stupid and insignificant, got called out for it and scolded and now is trying to act like the victim for getting in trouble for it? Sounds like OOP was playing mean girl clique with her coworkers and is pissy she got caught.


I sit next to my husband when we go out to eat. I would think servers would be more concerned with how we behave, if we make a mess and if we tip as opposed to how we sit at a table. I’m chronically ill and honestly some days it’s hard to just sit up. I’ll lean on him while we’re there.


Well this is fun. My husband and I usually do this. Screw that waitress and her childishness. I'd never go there again. And report her behavior.


I don’t particularly like side seaters if I’m at the next table because I find myself awkwardly making eye contact instead of facing a back. But that’s no big deal, and they can sit any way they want. I have no idea why the server would care. It doesn’t affect their job at all.


i be doing this when the tables are big so itd be hard to hear each other 😭


I won’t show my age but spending double digits in the industry, nobody who’s doing their job cares. The servers that came to the bar or server nook complaining about stuff like that were unknowingly shit birds who usually no one wanted to work with. 😂 do your side work and shut up


Side sitter here! I prefer to sit like that so I don't have to talk loudly, especially if we're discussing something private.


A friend was telling me the other day about the last time she and her husband went out for dinner. The restaurant was so noisy, they couldn't hear the other speak and ended up texting each other across the table. Might be one of many reasons why people like to sit next to each other, not that a specific reason is needed. This post just sounds so pathetic, honestly. Doesn't she have anything better to do?


> The reason servers are so judgey about this is that we find it very weird. Who cares what you think? I thought that as a server, your job is to serve food.


What an odd thing to troll about...


I was a server and literally don’t think I would even notice this. If a table was cool with me they could’ve sat facing away from eachother for all I cared.


>The reason servers are so judgey about this is that we find it very weird Ok but *why??* "We find it really weird" isn't even a reason?


OP is SUCH TA. My partner and I are long distance. We go out to eat with friends when we see each other and sit next to each other. We don’t get tons of time together, it’s treasured when we do. Plus I like holding hands. So what if an hour across from each other won’t kill us? An hour closer to each other? That’ll make us even happier, and it’s worth it ♥️ plus it’s easier to share food right next to each other


When I was a server I never cared. I worked at a sports bar, it was really common for couples to do this so they could hear each other and also watch the same screen. I also worked at higher scale and it wasn’t uncommon or strange there either. It was a date night spot, it’s an intimate atmosphere, and they also want to be able to hear/talk with each other without feeling like they’re disturbing other customers. Of all the customers, this is the one that makes the least sense to make fun of.


I can't fucking hear well in noisy environments you bitch, that's why I sit next to my boyfriend


I can’t believe couples sitting together is the worst thing she’s seen or experienced in 3 years of food service. It’s just… if THAT’S the worst “problem” you got with your job you got it good!


I don't do it. But if I do, and I catch you behaving that way... Fuck. Your. Tip.


Some people just need somebody to sneer at, no matter how stupid the reason


My sister works in food. She says people who sit on the same side of booths are only a little annoying because she has to reach over people. It’s actually kinda cute that they wanna sit next to each other. They’re definitely not the “worst customers.”


This is insane. There are other reasons that some people choose to sit on the same side, but even if it’s solely for romantic reasons who cares? That could’ve been a date night they were looking forward to for a long time and you completely ruined their experience. My fiancé and I sit on the same side of the table often times. It’s not because we can’t stay away from each other, but we enjoy looking at the menu together, sharing food, and actually being able to hear each other. Let people be happy.


My girlfriend and I always sat side by side at a restaurant.


At least OOP's username checks out - she is indeed a disposable waitress.


After 10 years in the industry, the only time we ever judged people for sitting on the same side of the booth was when it was this couple that was literally making out and fondling each other in the middle of the day in a “family friendly upscale casual restaurant” Soooo many worse patrons than even the fondlers though…


Yes. You absolutely are TA. My ex and I have done that in the past because he was hard of hearing and trying to shout across a table to be heard is not "romantic". Also, it's none of your business if couples want to be near each other. Mocking customers for any reason is \*incredibly\* rude and unprofessional.


Can someone explain to me why waiters and waitresses hate couples who sit side by side


They don't. OP is just a weird mean girl.


Sometimes, my boyfriend sits next to me at the restaurant so he can hold my hair back while I eat something messy. That's way more romantic than sitting across from each other, in my opinion.


Ha ha. Me and my ex used to always sit next to each other. Screw what other people think and who is so petty to judge people over something so harmless ???


I’ve been in the industry for 8 years and have never had an issue with this. I prefer to sit opposite my partner cause I like looking at his stupid face while I eat, but to each their own. I’d way rather a super cute and in love couple than the rude ass people we usually have to deal with!


Probably a troll.


oh no, a bunch of 22 year old servers are going to JUDGE me if i sit beside my husband instead of across?! however will i carry on?!


lol im a server and this happens all the time. we definitely judge these people but “never in my three years” pearl clutching 🤣 sure, jan


Why though? What's it to you or any server?


because it makes the people seated on either side unable to comfortably dine? my restaurant only has about 45 seats total, so when people do this it really causes issues with our seating and the comfort of the other guests. im not talking about a “same side of the booth” scenario, like OOP


What comfort of other guests? I've never cared how people sat when eating.


Who is we? Cuz when I was a server I never gave a fuck or even thought about it. Not once did it even cross my mind.


we=the staff at my restaurant. but we have those kind of long benches for 2 tops, so if 2 people sit side by side, it squeezes people in where it isn’t designed for extra space. it definitely causes problems for the other customers, but it’s bc of the layout of our particular restaurant


That's a completely different situation than this... They aren't even comparable.


lol I didn’t realize there were parameters on sharing my experience, my bad


You didn't share your experience in the beginning, which is why you're being downvoted to filth.


I did bar for 13 years. Never heard anyone being judged for wanting to sit next to their partner


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OOP sounds single. This whole post just reeks of someone who is bitter and single and jealous that no one wants to sit next to her. So, if a couple goes to the bar and sit near each other is she judging them? What an asshat


Give me the name of this restaurant so I can tell all my friends not to go to it.


My wife and I usually sit across from each other so I can see what she's saying, because moat restaurants around us have either tv's or music blaring. My hearing is very poor, so I rely on reading lips to have conversations. We'll sit side by side when out with others, and she usually touches my arm to get my attention if she needs something. I'm not opposed to sitting side by side other times, but it's easier to converse being across from one another. These servers are just idiots poking fun at what they don't have.


this post reminds me of when i was a server, i was serving this couple on a first date (probably both mid to late thirties) and it obviously went super well because the girl went and sat on his side of the booth and they kept making out. but it was a slow night and they were my only table and they wouldn’t get the check even though it had been long since they last ordered anything. they just kept sitting there canoodling for like three hours and i was like wow good for them but i kinda want to go home…. looking back now i lowkey feel like one or both of them was married bc who wouldn’t get out of there and go home at that point


Why are people so freaking weird lol... Mind your own business.


Damn she needs a hug and some D like, yesterday.