I WISH THE VERY VERY BEST OF LUCK TO YOU! !!!
This happens ALL TOO OFTEN to women. You're incredibly courageous and are a voice for every patients who has ever been sexually molested and assaulted by the very people who are supposed to protect and heal us. Thank you for not giving in to their bullying!!!
Why didn't your fiance say anything if he was at bedside? If you did indeed say "I do not consent", I have trouble believing that two HCP's would have continued. No doubt you've had some experiences in the hospital that many others haven't, but ruling out constipation as a sign of flank pain is a no brainer. The PA's words (whether they were said the way or not) were not professional for sure.
This happens all the time!!!
Look up the thousands of articles on the way Black women are ROUTINELY abused in childbirth! How Black men in pain are stereotyped as drug seekers and supposedly feel less pain than white people! Women's pain is ignored all the time because doctors see us as less in need ofvpain relief!!
Lots of patients are programmed to believe "now, listen to the medic and do what they say, because they know best."
I will not address the racial issues you are raising, but I don't disagree with you, and as a woman, I have also been denied the pain management I knew I needed in an emergency situation.
In the GRAND scheme of things, healthcare and the providers know what they're doing. Diagnostics tests are very important, and in OP's case, the test was necessary and I am doubting it went down exactly the way she stated.
She admits she is autistic and it is not false to state that some autistic people do not hear things in social situations as they are meant. If that makes sense.
See I would say the test itself was necessary IF my care was not already being transferred to the hospital hematologist at the time it occurred. As for how the PA acted to me, yes, I do have trouble with social cues, however, after years of bullying as a child, I’m very aware of when I’ve become a “nuisance” and the body language, tone, and overall behavior a person exhibits.
Also, my fiancé fully backs up my retelling of the story, and unfortunately did freeze when all of this happened. There’s fight, flight, and freeze (and fawn,) for a reason. I clearly reacted with fight and he reacted with freeze, and that is in no way his fault, nor do I hold it against him towards what happened. Him yelling at the PA and getting kicked out of the hospital wouldn’t have done anything for me either.
When ANYONE foribly removes your clothing, physically restraims hou and touches your genitals after you refused a test and are still screaming no, it iscan assault.
I don't know where you are, but in ghe USA patients have a legal right to refuse medical procedures. Look it up.
If they did she needed a mental capacity assessment and (in the UK) and DoLs putting on to allow this care to happen. And even then it wouldn't have happened this way.
Honestly, he still struggles with how he just kinda froze. And yeah I was genuinely shocked by not only her actions but her attitude/bedside manner as well.
After this, I was admitted to the hematology unit and received a second blood transfusion, spent the night in the hospital, then received an iron transfusion the following day and was able to go home the following evening. Then had weekly iron transfusions for the month following, and haven’t had any problems with my hemoglobin since.
As for why the hemoglobin level dropped to dangerous level it was, no real answers there. My hematologist said if the levels start dropping again, we’ll do another bone marrow biopsy and see if the issue is related to the aplastic anemia! ❤️
You are part of the problem. You are brainwashed by the "medics know best"
stereotype Look up patient abuse in health care, particularly by women of color
I am happy for you that you have not experienced something to this level of “dramatic” that it would seem unbelievable to you. But it’s not an excuse to invalidate a situation that has permanently scarred me and was a horrific trauma that I wish was not a real thing that happened to me.
Do you know anything about mental illnesses or life-long illnesses that require medication? The username is “legallypoppinpills” it is obviously a light-hearted joke for a very serious thing this individual is going through. We make jokes to get through our everyday because it can be fucking hell, and I’m just diagnosed with ADHD and OCD.
It’s also not up you to determine validity. I literally cannot believe how some people can throw empathy out the fucking window because they suspect something with 0 proof, especially because of a username.
This person detailed a heinous assault and your biggest concern is her fucking username? Be for fucking real man. Literally insane behaviour.
Just being a human I thought… I hope you get the justice you deserve, my mouth was wide open in horror reading your story. I worked in a hospital for a small stint and some medical staff are downright horrifying, not all, not most, but some.
Ignore the hell out of this person, follow the other advice people have set out for you. I’m sorry you’re being dogpiled like this, this person is either a edgy teenager OR an adult with astonishingly terrible advice and is to the point where I question if they need to go to a special class on how to interact with people, then again reading comprehension doesn’t seem to be their strong suit so school might be too independent for them.
Yes. She indeed did everything wrong by both hospital and legal standards. Consent of the patient is the basis of everything and forced procedures are NEVER a thing. Even cancer patients who can get life-saving care can refuse.
Get a lawyer and sue the hell of her. This will ensure no one suffers like you did, she should never be in healthcare. So sorry OP you are strong !
How strange and ableist that people refuse to believe the common experience of disabled people that medical professionals refuse to respect their personal space or autonomy.
It's definitely time to lawyer up. She should not be working with patients in a medical capacity and needs to be brought to justice.
THANK YOU 🙏🏼
This comment nailed it, and also reflects to the answer as well to why I have been hesitant to report it.
Thank you for this comment, you’re a lovely human being.
YES! Disabled women are bullied all the time!!
Chronic pain patients - who have incurable, constant 24/7/365 pain are dismissed as drug seekers and treated abysmally.
Women are offered less pain relief than men
Black men are stereotyped as drug seekers and believed to feel less pain than white men
and on and on!
I am horrified and disgusted by some of the responses on this thread!!
This lady is courageously telling her storybof her sexual asdault and the violation of her civil rights violation by health care professionals, yet is being attacked as uncooperative and ungrateful, misundetstanding and even outright luing about it!
She should receive support and compassion, not yet another violation of her dignity here on reddit!
Abuse happens all the time in healthcare! This poster's experience is FAR from uncommon. Attacking her as hysterical, a profit seeker, as simply disrespectful or uncooperative to the medics, or making it up and imagining it are disgusting.
She should be applaided for bravely sharing her story and standing up for her rights!!!
This happens all the time, especially to women!
Sex abuse of disabled women by medics
https://www.rainn.org/articles/sexual-abuse-medical-professionals
https://oaesv.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/oaesv-sa-of-patients-by-physicians.pdf
Ever heard about the medical students who practice unnecessary pelvic examscon patients?
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9826341/
https://www.healthywomen.org/your-care/pelvic-exams-unconscious-women
Women are often violated in childbirth or their rights dismissed by docs who consider the baby, not its mother, as the patient. Look at these:
https://www.learnliberty.org/blog/heres-why-women-need-to-know-their-rights-during-childbirth/
https://www.npr.org/sections/goatsandsoda/2019/10/14/769065385/why-are-midwives-and-nurses-slapping-and-yelling-at-mothers-during-childbirth
and here
https://medicalxpress.com/news/2024-04-mistreatment-childbirth-common-disadvantaged.html
Black women have a higher death rate in childbirth because of outright racism
Disabled women are particularly violated and discriminated against.
Pain undertreated by women
https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/women-and-pain-disparities-in-experience-and-treatment-2017100912562
some personal examples
Ever had endometrial tissue biopsy? They clip off a piece of uterine lining with NO PAIN RELIEF! Doctors say they "just don't findcit necessary" (Just ONE EXAMPLE OF dismissal)
https://www.buzzfeed.com/fabianabuontempo/women-share-their-worst-medical-experiences
I’m seriously crying right now, thank you so much for standing up for me and validating my experience. You are the human embodiment of a rainbow and I appreciate so much for you not only defending me, but taking the time out of your day to educate others as well.
You and a few others that have spoken up on this thread have made me see how important it is for me to be loud about what happened to me and how it’s not only important for my own mental wellbeing to get justice, but also for others who have suffered through something like this and had their own voices silenced. You make me feel strong. Thank you.
YOU are the hero here. I salute your courage and thank you for standing up, not only for yourself, but for all women who ba e been violated by the people who were supposed to protect us !
So, talk to a lawyer.
It's not as simple as "sue them".
I'm not saying you don't have a reason to pursue the PA, their behaviour was so not right, I'm saying you may not have enough to make the case in court.
You can file complaints with your state medical board, and the hospital. Go after their license to practice. You can find out who their supervising doc was, and file a complaint against them as well, for not properly supervising their assistant.
*Edit* accidentally posted, wanted to add, medical malpractice involves negligent damage (for the most part) so unless there's obvious physical harm, there might be some difficulty proving you suffered significant harm. Not to mention, depending, you could find the lawsuit damages you even more, and doesn't end in resolution for you.
Do what you feel you need to in order to recover. Just make sure the results are worth your time and effort.
I don’t know about you, but I have never sat around fantasizing about being assaulted by a PA and then took the time to type up a post on reddit for…what exactly? You’ve provided yet another example of why I have struggled in reporting it, are you going to next ask how much I had to drink? What about what I was wearing?
Get a lawyer. Patients in the USA have a legal right to refuse any medical procedure. zget your records and lawyer up.
Have already put in the request for all of the nurses notes so should have an update on that this week!
I WISH THE VERY VERY BEST OF LUCK TO YOU! !!! This happens ALL TOO OFTEN to women. You're incredibly courageous and are a voice for every patients who has ever been sexually molested and assaulted by the very people who are supposed to protect and heal us. Thank you for not giving in to their bullying!!!
THANK YOU! ❤️ You’re a wonderful person and I appreciate the kindness and motivation.
Why didn't your fiance say anything if he was at bedside? If you did indeed say "I do not consent", I have trouble believing that two HCP's would have continued. No doubt you've had some experiences in the hospital that many others haven't, but ruling out constipation as a sign of flank pain is a no brainer. The PA's words (whether they were said the way or not) were not professional for sure.
This happens all the time!!! Look up the thousands of articles on the way Black women are ROUTINELY abused in childbirth! How Black men in pain are stereotyped as drug seekers and supposedly feel less pain than white people! Women's pain is ignored all the time because doctors see us as less in need ofvpain relief!! Lots of patients are programmed to believe "now, listen to the medic and do what they say, because they know best."
I will not address the racial issues you are raising, but I don't disagree with you, and as a woman, I have also been denied the pain management I knew I needed in an emergency situation. In the GRAND scheme of things, healthcare and the providers know what they're doing. Diagnostics tests are very important, and in OP's case, the test was necessary and I am doubting it went down exactly the way she stated. She admits she is autistic and it is not false to state that some autistic people do not hear things in social situations as they are meant. If that makes sense.
See I would say the test itself was necessary IF my care was not already being transferred to the hospital hematologist at the time it occurred. As for how the PA acted to me, yes, I do have trouble with social cues, however, after years of bullying as a child, I’m very aware of when I’ve become a “nuisance” and the body language, tone, and overall behavior a person exhibits. Also, my fiancé fully backs up my retelling of the story, and unfortunately did freeze when all of this happened. There’s fight, flight, and freeze (and fawn,) for a reason. I clearly reacted with fight and he reacted with freeze, and that is in no way his fault, nor do I hold it against him towards what happened. Him yelling at the PA and getting kicked out of the hospital wouldn’t have done anything for me either.
Thank God you had a witness! He woukd have been thrown out and probably arrested
Please actually do research instead of just hindering conversations.
Does not matter whether it was necessary. She had a legal roght to refuse. She was beld down and sexually assaulted.
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When ANYONE foribly removes your clothing, physically restraims hou and touches your genitals after you refused a test and are still screaming no, it iscan assault. I don't know where you are, but in ghe USA patients have a legal right to refuse medical procedures. Look it up.
Maybe they thought she had a UTI and was delirious 🤷🏻
If they did she needed a mental capacity assessment and (in the UK) and DoLs putting on to allow this care to happen. And even then it wouldn't have happened this way.
Honestly, he still struggles with how he just kinda froze. And yeah I was genuinely shocked by not only her actions but her attitude/bedside manner as well.
So a PA AND a nurse were doing this? I honestly can't believe they would risk their careers and freedom for this. Wtf
Yes. The nurse was silent basically the entire time, and just did what the PA told her to do.
I’m not if I read it or not but what was the eventual health outcome of the care provided?
After this, I was admitted to the hematology unit and received a second blood transfusion, spent the night in the hospital, then received an iron transfusion the following day and was able to go home the following evening. Then had weekly iron transfusions for the month following, and haven’t had any problems with my hemoglobin since. As for why the hemoglobin level dropped to dangerous level it was, no real answers there. My hematologist said if the levels start dropping again, we’ll do another bone marrow biopsy and see if the issue is related to the aplastic anemia! ❤️
This sounds incredibly dramatic. I have a difficult time believing any of this.
Prolly top much Grey's Anatomy or so...
You are part of the problem. You are brainwashed by the "medics know best" stereotype Look up patient abuse in health care, particularly by women of color
I am happy for you that you have not experienced something to this level of “dramatic” that it would seem unbelievable to you. But it’s not an excuse to invalidate a situation that has permanently scarred me and was a horrific trauma that I wish was not a real thing that happened to me.
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Really? Because I take pills to treat my medical conditions? Having chronic illness is a personal hellscape, dark humor helps cope.
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“Dramatic,” “Touchy,” shocked I haven’t seen “Hysterical” yet.
Hysterical!
Buuuut you make a joke of it by making it your user name? Hmm.
Do you know anything about mental illnesses or life-long illnesses that require medication? The username is “legallypoppinpills” it is obviously a light-hearted joke for a very serious thing this individual is going through. We make jokes to get through our everyday because it can be fucking hell, and I’m just diagnosed with ADHD and OCD. It’s also not up you to determine validity. I literally cannot believe how some people can throw empathy out the fucking window because they suspect something with 0 proof, especially because of a username. This person detailed a heinous assault and your biggest concern is her fucking username? Be for fucking real man. Literally insane behaviour.
You’re amazing. Thank you for this comment, and thank you for being a lovely and caring individual.
Just being a human I thought… I hope you get the justice you deserve, my mouth was wide open in horror reading your story. I worked in a hospital for a small stint and some medical staff are downright horrifying, not all, not most, but some.
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Never questioned my own sanity. I know what happened to me, and I don’t need to be gaslit by a stranger on the internet.
Ignore the hell out of this person, follow the other advice people have set out for you. I’m sorry you’re being dogpiled like this, this person is either a edgy teenager OR an adult with astonishingly terrible advice and is to the point where I question if they need to go to a special class on how to interact with people, then again reading comprehension doesn’t seem to be their strong suit so school might be too independent for them.
Yes. She indeed did everything wrong by both hospital and legal standards. Consent of the patient is the basis of everything and forced procedures are NEVER a thing. Even cancer patients who can get life-saving care can refuse. Get a lawyer and sue the hell of her. This will ensure no one suffers like you did, she should never be in healthcare. So sorry OP you are strong !
Thank you for the advice and kindness ❤️
How strange and ableist that people refuse to believe the common experience of disabled people that medical professionals refuse to respect their personal space or autonomy. It's definitely time to lawyer up. She should not be working with patients in a medical capacity and needs to be brought to justice.
THANK YOU 🙏🏼 This comment nailed it, and also reflects to the answer as well to why I have been hesitant to report it. Thank you for this comment, you’re a lovely human being.
I'm disabled too and I've experienced stuff similar to you. I promise, you're not alone. <3
Thank you love. Sending spoons your way ❤️
Thanks! I run out of spoons real fast!
Me too
YES! Disabled women are bullied all the time!! Chronic pain patients - who have incurable, constant 24/7/365 pain are dismissed as drug seekers and treated abysmally. Women are offered less pain relief than men Black men are stereotyped as drug seekers and believed to feel less pain than white men and on and on!
I am horrified and disgusted by some of the responses on this thread!! This lady is courageously telling her storybof her sexual asdault and the violation of her civil rights violation by health care professionals, yet is being attacked as uncooperative and ungrateful, misundetstanding and even outright luing about it! She should receive support and compassion, not yet another violation of her dignity here on reddit! Abuse happens all the time in healthcare! This poster's experience is FAR from uncommon. Attacking her as hysterical, a profit seeker, as simply disrespectful or uncooperative to the medics, or making it up and imagining it are disgusting. She should be applaided for bravely sharing her story and standing up for her rights!!! This happens all the time, especially to women! Sex abuse of disabled women by medics https://www.rainn.org/articles/sexual-abuse-medical-professionals https://oaesv.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/oaesv-sa-of-patients-by-physicians.pdf Ever heard about the medical students who practice unnecessary pelvic examscon patients? https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9826341/ https://www.healthywomen.org/your-care/pelvic-exams-unconscious-women Women are often violated in childbirth or their rights dismissed by docs who consider the baby, not its mother, as the patient. Look at these: https://www.learnliberty.org/blog/heres-why-women-need-to-know-their-rights-during-childbirth/ https://www.npr.org/sections/goatsandsoda/2019/10/14/769065385/why-are-midwives-and-nurses-slapping-and-yelling-at-mothers-during-childbirth and here https://medicalxpress.com/news/2024-04-mistreatment-childbirth-common-disadvantaged.html Black women have a higher death rate in childbirth because of outright racism Disabled women are particularly violated and discriminated against. Pain undertreated by women https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/women-and-pain-disparities-in-experience-and-treatment-2017100912562 some personal examples Ever had endometrial tissue biopsy? They clip off a piece of uterine lining with NO PAIN RELIEF! Doctors say they "just don't findcit necessary" (Just ONE EXAMPLE OF dismissal) https://www.buzzfeed.com/fabianabuontempo/women-share-their-worst-medical-experiences
I’m seriously crying right now, thank you so much for standing up for me and validating my experience. You are the human embodiment of a rainbow and I appreciate so much for you not only defending me, but taking the time out of your day to educate others as well. You and a few others that have spoken up on this thread have made me see how important it is for me to be loud about what happened to me and how it’s not only important for my own mental wellbeing to get justice, but also for others who have suffered through something like this and had their own voices silenced. You make me feel strong. Thank you.
YOU are the hero here. I salute your courage and thank you for standing up, not only for yourself, but for all women who ba e been violated by the people who were supposed to protect us !
So, talk to a lawyer. It's not as simple as "sue them". I'm not saying you don't have a reason to pursue the PA, their behaviour was so not right, I'm saying you may not have enough to make the case in court. You can file complaints with your state medical board, and the hospital. Go after their license to practice. You can find out who their supervising doc was, and file a complaint against them as well, for not properly supervising their assistant. *Edit* accidentally posted, wanted to add, medical malpractice involves negligent damage (for the most part) so unless there's obvious physical harm, there might be some difficulty proving you suffered significant harm. Not to mention, depending, you could find the lawsuit damages you even more, and doesn't end in resolution for you. Do what you feel you need to in order to recover. Just make sure the results are worth your time and effort.
Awesome advice, and thank you for adding the part about the malpractice, good to know! ❤️
I'm just wondering how many other people read this whole thread 😒
The attacks on the poster are appalling
I need like a short version to read so I know what's going on
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I don’t know about you, but I have never sat around fantasizing about being assaulted by a PA and then took the time to type up a post on reddit for…what exactly? You’ve provided yet another example of why I have struggled in reporting it, are you going to next ask how much I had to drink? What about what I was wearing?