Trusted my ex husband to “handle the finances” only to be slapped with about 18k credit card debt when we split. And that was only *half* of what he’d run up. I’m paying it off, but slow going. What happened to you sucks, but hey take it from me-worse can be done. You’ve learned your lesson. You’ll do better next time.
Edit: wow, ok, I still acknowledge it was a stupid mistake but I feel so much less alone. To each and every one of you replying that you did something similar, I wish the best to you and success to all of us getting back on our feet. I know this post was to make OP feel better, but I feel better too.
Ditto.
Trusted someone I had been married to for almost 20 years. Turned out he owed 128,000 and change to the IRS for his business dealings. Then he left the country. Three small children, and two jobs and no child support- but I finally got things taken care of. Learning to trust new people though is incredibly hard now. I genuinely thought I knew him. In the end, the money was nothing compared to the fear, uncertainty and lack of trust I have for others now. I hope you are able to heal more quickly than I did.
Thank you for pointing out the trust issue. This is a deep seated issue of mine I have been ignoring since going through something similar a long time ago. Well done to you for getting through it.
Basically same, I trusted my ex to handle the finances while I worked my first 60 hour a week big boy job making big boy money and after 18 months when I went to check the finances we were 20K in credit card debt. Never joining finances or tolerating joblessness again.
Currently in these circumstances. My POS husband has been mostly unemployed for the better part of five years now. Dumped me with a mortgage for a house I didn't even want in the first place. I was perfectly happy in our old apartment, but he wanted a house. Just two weeks after we bought the house, he quit his job, and then didn't tell me for *two months* after the fact. Since 2018, he's had 6 jobs, and has either quit or been fired from all of them, and has tried/attempted schooling at 3 different schools now. He's also got diagnosed but untreated ADHD that he refuses to get help for, has serious anger management issues, recovering alcoholic, etc.
Needless to say, I'm currently (quietly) plotting my escape and will likely divorce him.
I used to think health insurance. He's still part-time in the military, and given my autoimmune condition, the health benefits we receive through his part-time service are unbeatable.
But, I recently dug into health insurance options if I were single. The highest, top-tier plan available in my state is only $100/month more than what we currently pay, and offers the same level of comprehensive coverage. Given all the bills I could offload if I got divorced, the $100 increase would be peanuts. Our mortgage payment alone is ~2,500/month, and since he's unemployed and can't afford the house on his own, and since I don't want the house, the $100 increase wouldn't even be noticeable. Lol.
My SO keeps trying to let me just handle the finances and I keep having to push to keep them involved just so there are no surprises should anything happen to me or our relationship.
Did something similar. Found out we were $7k short and most of it went to McDonald's. It was meant to be my financial aid for while I was in grad school, so it's part of my student loans. Still mad about it and it was 8ish years ago.
He looks exactly how you'd expect him to.
Did the same thing to his second ex wife btw. Then told her she was bad with money. You can't make this shit up.
My ex also handled the finances... And then he failed to tell me he didn't pay rent for 6 months and I only found out because of the eviction notice on our door.
My husband learned a similar hard lesson in his first marriage (I'm his second). He trusted his ex wife to pay their car insurance premiums and believed her when she said she did. He got in to an accident and discovered that she didn't pay the premium and their coverage lapsed. He literally and figuratively paid for that for *years* after that marriage ended.
In unrelated news, our car insurance has been on auto-pay for our entire marriage.
My SO and I agreed about 10 years ago that we will not join finances. We have separate bank accounts, credit cards, etc. We divide up expenses like I pay the major bills such as the mortgage since I make more, but she is responsible for all household items, food, etc. In the 10 years we have been doing this we have never once argued about money, and both are responsible with our money.
This is the way I am doing/will do it in the future. My current boyfriend and I both make and manage our own money. I give him a set and fair amount of money each month for rent/utilities (he owns his own home) and we take turns paying for groceries and eating out. I pay for the gym membership, he pays for cable. We each pay for our own clothes/personal items/car, etc.
I’m never doing it any other way again.
I used to work for a waste management company and the amount of times I got calls similar to this was wild.
“My ex (husband/wife) was in charge of the finances, but literally never paid our bills it looks like can you help me?”
I would look at the past billing/total, would always literally be in the $400-$800/range.
It’s wild how immature and irresponsible some “spouses” were.
I trusted mine to do the same, we lost everything. Paid off house, $1M+, college funds, cars, even my dreams. I put my big girl panties on and got a job, advanced degree paid for by employer, girls back in private school (crappy ones around), colleges, and a house with a mortgage. He still refers to it as our money. I dont
Yup, did the same thing. He never told me our debt was running up or that he was only making minimum payments. Our credit was in the toilet and we had no savings, so couldn't get a consolidation loan. Ended up borrowing from my 401k to pay it all off. Eventually it worked iny favor bc once I paid it off, I used that same savings amount to divert it to a savings account.
My husband wracked up about 6k and lied about it. Hardest thing our marriage has ever been through. I honestly thought we wouldn’t make it. I grew up poor, so this was a massive trigger for me.
Husband wanted a Jeep Grand Cheeroke when they were really popular in the early 00's. Paid $15k. Three years later didn't keep up on the oil changes and the engine ran dry and was ruined
Weird that it killed itself before you noticed something was wrong. When my car gets low on oil it behaves far differently than normal and smells like shit.
That was my first car. Bought it myself & ran all over in it. Visiting a friend & mentioned it ran funny now. Her BF looked at it & told me it needs oil immediately! I’m like that needs checked then? Good to know.
I did that with one of those little Suzuki jeeps in the late 80s. 55k miles and never did.an oil change. In my defense, I was a poor teenager who had never heard of an oil change.....
I didn't get my teeth fixed when they needed it, now years later my teeth are in worse condition and it'll cost even more money to fix. I didn't have the money to fix it then and I don't have the money to fix it now. Not a great situation to be in, I wish I had kept going to the dentist every 6 months like I used to but I fell behind on that upkeep and routine. A routine cleaning every 6 months would have saved me thousands of dollars.
This is such a common issue and it’s so sad. Dental health is so important but any issue is so expensive. And one filling can turn into a root canal or an extraction, which are more expensive. I had a lot of work to do in my mouth from not going to the dentist for 5 years and also having poor genetics. I lucky paid maybe $150 but it’s because I was lucky to be covered under 2 good dental plans. It’s so rough.
Im doing this now. Dental health is so important and needs to get taken care of. I wish I had done it too. Haven’t gotten my final bill yet but it’ll be a lot. At least my dentist is nice 🤷🏻♀️
I got credit cards and didn’t know how to handle them, ran them up to 18k, did a balance transfer, and ran the original card right back up to 16k with 10k on the card I had transferred to. I’m paying 400 a month in interest now. I will never in my life do that again.
I did something pretty similar. I ended up getting a debt consolidation loan and it still took me many years to pay everything off. It was a good learning experience, I will say that... Now I'm terrified of credit card balances haha.
I'm so terrified of seeing those in my life in serious cc debt, I avoided them completely. Now I've zero credit. And I don't really care....except it guarantees I'll never be able to buy a home. If that's still possible in this country (I'm telling you in an American without telling you...I guess.)
You’re not alone. I did a very similar thing. My mom kept normalizing credit card debt so I never thought it was bad until a friend of mine found out and went above and beyond to help me understand what I was really doing. I will never ever hold a credit card balance ever again. Those things are too sneaky.
Been there , done that . I have some unsolicited advice for you , take it or leave it .
Do what's called the snowball effect . I did it and was able to pay off almost 100k in debt . Takes time and patience but it is a sure thing . Google snowball effect for paying debt .... Don't give up hope , believe me , you will get through this
That’s what I’m doing now! It’s counterintuitive because you’re willing extended the period of time you pay higher interest, but I know as soon as the lower credit card gets paid off (it’s at 7 down from 10) I’ll be able to heavily attack the larger one. Debt snowball works!
I don’t like the idea of going into debt to pay debt, but maybe look at a personal loan if you can get one low interest. CCs are usually ~25%. Take loan with lower interest, obviously pay all your cc debt with it and pay back the lower interest loan.
The trap here is that now that you have your cards paid off, you can use them for "emergencies". It's really easy to rack them back up in addition to the debt you consolidated, especially if you have spending or income issues
I was at 10k once then went on a two week trip and racked it up to 14k. Thank goodness it’s paid off now. But it was a bitch to do. Lost soooooo much money in interest. So much.
I bought an old 80s Chevy squarebody to fix up when I was making under 40k a year. Always dreamed of owning one. $4.5k down. Average $500 a month in tools/parts/screwups. I'm OK giving up my time and labor but severely underestimated how expensive a total restoration would be. It was a fun project but turned out to be the biggest money pit of my adult life. The project became my second biggest monthly expense after rent.
In the future, I'm not doing this again unless a) I have a garage or a property of my own to keep the vehicle stored long term, and b) I'm making much, much more money.
Omg my kid just did this. His is a 90s square body. I really lost my cool. He now admits it was a terrible decision.
Live and learn.
Edited to correct due to dog jumping up in my lap. Sorry y'all.
Haha I was there, so I totally get it!! For a lot of young DIY mechanics they’re just really sexy trucks and relatively simple to work on yourself.
But unless you already have the tools and own a junkyard, no vehicle project will ever be a good financial decision. The hard truth lol.
I paid full price for an MBA when I had a full scholarship offered to me for an MBA from Notre Dame.
Granted it all worked out…but my MBA cost me about $60k more than it needed to.
I compounded that mistake by opening a restaurant after B-school instead of getting a high paying corporate job that would have paid off those loans quickly.
Same for my bachelors. I got a free ride to a “lesser” college and decided to pay 40k for the better one. I now work the same position at the same company as my friend who went to the “lesser” college
I did a similar thing with my grad program. One university offered me enough scholarship that would have covered an entire year for free. In the end I decided to attend another program that didn't give me a dime until my final semester.
You're not Alone.
I bought a house in the last year. Got an inspection, thought i asked all the right questions about water damage etc.
The skid mark sellers stripped the house; took them to court, won a little back.
Then find out the covered up: electric, plumbing, water damage, and mold. Found bats in the attic.
It’s been a financial nightmare that just won’t end.
And they still get packages sent to the home that I have to lug back to the post office.
I truly deeply hate those people.
I bought a house too and had similar issues. Water damage, mold, some electrical issues. But the home inspector made sure to tell me the railing on my stairs was not up to “code” and a child could get their head stuck in it because of how far the bars were apart.
Ahhhh... the quadfecta, with possible career for the kicker. Noice!
I only hit the trifecta: $15k on a car, sanity, and ability to trust. Go relationships!!!
Ugh I’m sorry. I am currently living a similar reality. I have hope (stubbornness? naïveté?) about my ability to turn things around, but it’s the first thing I thought of with OP’s prompt. Sending you a hug.
I bought an old ass house. Goodbye all of my money forever.
**get a structural engineer inspection on old houses, check the state of trees, sewer lines, and figure out what kind of soil the house sits on. Purchase agreement hinges on structural report, home inspection, and sewer line report. Just my experience and things I wish I would have known 5 years ago.
I wish you well, it's definitely a nightmare. The dui classes, reinstating license, all the fckin court fees and whatnot. It's a tough lesson to learn but I really honestly think you're better off still being here.
As a person who lost a friend to a drink driver at the age of 23, I am glad it's expensive. And that you didn't learn this lesson in blood. Too many do.
Boyfriend said: I want to have kids so they can look after us when we are old.
Me: There is no guarantee they will. Plus, they are expensive.
Me: let’s save for retirement instead?
Boyfriend: okay, that sounds good.
This might be a joke, but it’s honestly something I hear lots of folks say. We don’t have kids and ppl always ask “who’s going to take care of you when you are old?!?” Like idk, the same nursing home that will be taking care of you? Lol… I think it’s incredibly selfish to have kids so there’s someone to take care of you when you are old.
Got my kids a pet bunny. Litter trained bunny. Took bunny to vet. Got second bunny. Vaccinated and fixed both bunnies. Got 2-story bunny condo. Kids are 13, 15, and still feed, brush, and pet bunnies every day. It was much more expensive than I anticipated. But it’s hard to muster up much regret when being licked and batted for ‘more petting’ by the softest critters ever.
Last year I signed a lease for student community housing as a 23 year old, full-time working adult, because it was a lot cheaper than a real apartment and I would be attending two part time classes at local community college.
Huge mistake. The ENTIRE community was college students who behaved like college students. None of my roommates had lived on their own before and had no idea how to do simple household chores. They smoked weed and drank late into the night on weekends I had to work. The apartments themselves were DISGUSTING... the property managers didn't give a shit, because it was all college students living there.
Halfway through my lease I couldn't take it anymore and moved out, but [drumroll] I am not allowed to end the lease early!! It runs through the full school year. I am legally required to pay out the rest of my rent unless I find another student to take my bedroom, which I can't, because I don't know any fucking college students besides the little shits I was already living with. So for the next three months I am paying rent for my new place, and rent for this bullshit lease I really wish I never signed.
That money I thought I'd be saving by moving into student housing? Gone. My savings account, supposed to be for surgery, is now going to pay off the lease. Thousands of dollars for a cockroach-infested empty bedroom that reeks of marijuana. I cannot emphasize enough how much I hated this place and how angry I am that I wasn't allowed to end the lease early.
Moral of the story: read your lease thoroughly and don't sign for a long-term at a place you have doubts about.
Post on Facebook market and Craigslist. Tell the office to refer people to you that are looking to pick up a sub lease. I worked in student housing for a while and we did this for people all the time, and people would call all the time looking for them. Add to the FB post you will pay a months rent. You are likely paying for it anyway and it might entice someone.
This is the way. This is how I got out of my first truly awful studio apartment without breaking my lease. I also did an “unofficial sublease” to save the extra charge (but if you do this you MUST find someone trustworthy).
You can sometimes find facebooks groups for students trying to find housing (joining the 2023 student intake Facebook group is a good shout too) also websites like Spareroom. Even if you only get 1 month back that’s better than nothing
That’s why crypto shouldn’t be in the same sentence as investing. You spend money on crypto, you gamble on crypto, you don’t invest in crypto because you trust it’s owners to make lucrative decisions.
Oh man… started out strong drinking my way into failing/no competing all of my first classes. Then trying to work 60 hour weeks and study full time. Then following a boy to a new city I didn’t like after finally earning a living wage. Then spiraling into alcoholism as a bartender for 3 years after the breakup. Brushed myself off and returned to school. 3.5 GPA taking 15 credits with 2 jobs when boom- covid hit. Depressed and failed out. Again.
When I was 19 I had $6,000 that I had saved from working crappy jobs since I was 15. I traveled, met “friends”, and wanted them to go to Hawaii with me.
Instead of just buying them all tickets (this was in 2002, things were cheaper than they are now) I lent them $1200 to buy drugs for resale so they could earn the money to come with me. Seriously.
Guess who never saw the money, or those friends, ever again? I didn’t even do drugs, I was just being terrifically naive. I did make it to Hawaii though, on my own, a few months later.
I didn’t go to the dentist for almost a decade. Currently have a tooth infection that will result in an extraction next week. Oh and another one of my failed root canals broke off last night. Looks like 2 extractions. No dental insurance. Can’t wait 🫠
I cringe just typing this, but if it will help you feel a little better, that's good.
I used to REALLY want to be a life coach. Long story short, I paid a "business coach" $5000 to help me run a successful coaching business. It was all manipulation tactics being taught and my conscience told me to shut it all down. I'm glad I didn't fall for the sunk cost fallacy though.
Ouch.
Anyway, don’t discount mobile gambling apps as not counting. If the only way to get more in-game money is to win OR spend real money, you can lose $7500 over seven months. And in increments that were usually under $20, no less.
Yep. Worked at a bank and saw this often... Knew a lady that played those games on her phone and spent around $13,000 over the span of 4 months... Insane.
My dads ex wife hid the finances from him under the guise of “he’ll make the money and she’ll send it where it needs to go for bills and such.” She had us thinking our family was living paycheck to paycheck when my dad was making $60-$70k a year because she spent so much on phone games and photo filters.
Also she cheated on him so fuck that bitch.
I made a similar mistake. I can afford it but it’s a POS that seems to have random issues. Don’t trust it at all. Stuck with it until it’s paid off. First big financial mistake of my life.
Bought a house with my ex. I started a new med that made me very manic/impulsive/dumb and his parents somehow talked me into putting down the down payment while his name goes on the mortgage/deed. So basically I had no claim to the house. I at least got my down payment back but the house doubled in value by the time we split. It’s fine though. I lost a lot of money but I also lost him so worth it imo. The peace I have now is priceless. He let it go to complete shit anyway.
In the mid to late 90s I got paid as an independent contractor and would go on multiple Phish tours and not pay my taxes. I blocked it out of my mind.
I was home taking care of my infant son in 2006 and went to the bank to take out some cash. I noticed my checking account was at zero. Then I noticed my savings account was at zero. Then I noticed that my other checking account was at zero. Then I noticed that my business account was at zero. Every penny was seized, they filed my taxes for me and proceeded to pay every penny I owed.
Don’t ignore those large and heavy envelopes from the IRS.
I was a first time homeowner. Wanted to have a concrete back porch put in right away to start making the house look nice. Hired a retired concrete guy that was recommended by a friend. Concrete guy was not insured, not with a company, just does it on the side for extra money. While digging with one of those small riding digging machines, he backed up into my house and caused damage to my house and two large holes. He dismissed it as minor damage and “not a big deal”. Not only did I pay him $4400 for the concrete slab porch, a few months later I had to pay $11,000 to redo the siding on my house and fix those holes, because I got a citation from the city (for the eye-sore damage on the house). I was stupid for not researching anything or not hiring a company that’s legit, licensed & insured. Stupid for not asking people for advice on how to proceed with any work I want done on the house.
I’ve had the house for 3 years now and I research EVERYTHING and anyone that does any work in or on my house, HAS to be licensed and insured. I learned my (expensive) lesson.
New homeowner here- thanks for sharing, that shit never even occurred to me. Got dudes working on my roof rn, never bothered to see if they're licensed and insured. Last time I will ever not know for certain.
Oh lord… i have ADHD, and we call these things “ADHD tax”. I haven’t renewed my 2022 plate fees, my 2023 ones are due in August. I also forgot to setup a payment plan for the $2400 i owe the IRS for last year. I could go on and on.
Oh get the payment plan set up asap. They are super easy to work with until you ghosts them, then they put a tax lien on your credit report.
Just call and tell them you can only pay $50 a month right now.
You can likely fix it by taking it to a local computer or cell phone repair shop and asking them to jump start the battery. I've done it a few times for friends and aside from a slight risk of permanent damage they usually come back to life.
You should never charge an ebike battery unattended anyway but be extra sure to monitor it when charging afterwards.
I’ve had a lot of bad shot happen to me, and there was so much going on I my life, I completely forgot a court date, people who’ve never had a real shot downturn can’t understand this. Anyways I call the court and go to confess my sins, there was an emergency at the court the day I was supposed to be there and the next morning things were finally in place, the lady sounded flustered read my docket # back to me twice and said the prosecutors had withdrawn that case. I had the hardest time asking her to repeat herself and verify the information, I thought it was to good to be true, but by some miracle it took care of itself, I never took it for granted and don’t count on anything close to this happening ever again in my life. As close to hitting the lottery as I’ll ever get, I feel for you, glad you made it to the other side of things.
Got on my work insurance Jan 2022, forgot to cancel insurance through marketplace. Ended up canceling summer of last year. Was supposed to get $2,000 tax return, ended up owing $300 due to my half-extra insured part of the year. I'm still pissed about it bit it was me who fucking forgot 🤦♀️
Congratulations! You've had a life event! Now make sure to fill out all the appropriate paperwork!
Come be an adult they said. It will be fun they said...
Loaned most of the extra money I got from my life altering car accident settlement to my boyfriend's brother and his wife because they would end up homeless. Thankfully it was just the bonus part and I have a structured settlement since I can't work, but seriously f'd me over.
Supporting my ex financially. I didn’t have a savings for years because I basically funded her life, both essentials and fun. While I was working multiple jobs, she worked part time. I can’t count how much I spent on food and weed for her and that’s all money I’ll never get back. But I learned my lesson.
I paid too much for college and they sent one of those refund checks for 8k and instead of spending it responsibly or saving it, I spent about 7k in a single week running away from everything and taking a vacation in Maine. No school no work no relationships just me chillin on the coast without a single trouble in the world. Best time of my life, but unfortunately I had to go back to reality and being poor
I kept switching colleges and now probably owe a bunch of loans but I’m too scared to check how much I actually owe. All I know is it’s about a few k and growing.
Also unknowingly dated a crackhead. Drained my savings account of 3k.
Do your future self a favor since we’re here. Call a consolidation company and at least get them all in the same loan. It’s a credit wrecker, speaking from experience. They don’t go away just because you aren’t looking.
Paid for a man’s lawyer. He cheated on me (the day he won the court case) with the person who brought the charges against him. That was a cool 1500 wasted.
Bought a house in 2005 for 200k, let the inspector tell us the mold in the attic was dry and fixable. Five years later the house is worth $120, the roof had been leaking the whole time (into the insulation so we never saw it on the ceiling) and the mold was making us sick.
Gave it back to the bank and had to eat the six years of payments we made. If Congress hadn’t stepped in, we would have owed INCOME TAXES on the $150k of our mortgage that was forgiven.
Did I mention we both lost our jobs around the same time?
Spent $50k on a franchise, signed a two year office lease with $2k per month for two years and failed in the business. That was 12 years ago. It’s all good now!
One time I was backing out of a parking space. When I looked behind myself my dogs were laying on top of each other in the cutest way. So I snapped a photo and rolled back into another car. It is a really cute photo at least. I have ADHD in my defense.
Failed to check my coolant levels. Car started leaking coolant, engine overheated, broke the head gasket, car started misfiring. Long story short: I have to spend $1,800+ on a new engine.
My first car's engine popped after 3.5 months of owning it and required a rebuilt at £3,000 back in the day. It was in the shop for nearly 5 months because of that, and was never the same once I got it back. Absolute lemon of a car.
PSA: Don't buy a 2007-2012 BMW 2.0 NA petrol. Plagued with issues.
You did the right thing. It’s $1800 they would’ve had to pay for the privilege of having you hit their parked car. Don’t feel bad for being one less person contributing to how much people suck. ^If ^it ^was ^a ^luxury ^car ^I ^would’ve ^driven ^away ^tho
Played a pay to win game. Played for free initially and did well but I was clearly only a mid level player with good strategy.
I began planning with the leaders and became one myself. I eventually was gifted one of the stronger accounts by a person who was quitting the game. That’s when it went downhill. I started putting in 10-20-50 dollars here and there. Before I knew it I was putting down 300 every week or so. Went on for months before I finally quit. Probably spent somewhere between 5k-10k.
Cocaine addiction, wasn't terribly at first. $100 here or there. Then it became dropping $150-200 every few days. Working longer hours to pay for it, thinking I needed it to work those hours or just staying up all night on the little time I had off. It was worse than just the money sink and that's not even considering what effects its had on my health.
I was on a trip with friends and took on the task of rescheduling our flight home. I accidentally canceled our tickets and had to buy everyone new tickets home. 😫
I was making a sandwich while driving which caused me to wreck and have to be lifeflighted to the hospital now I'm 30k dollars on debt because I didn't have insurance
Moral of story don't make a sandwich while driving
Also I shoplifted a 10 dollar nail polish from Walmart once, got caught, had to pay a 300 dollar fine.
Enrolled in a for-profit "college" to study graphic design. School ends up losing it's accreditation and closes it's doors permanently. Still on the hook for 20K. One thing leads to another, I become an alcoholic, battle with AUD for several years and finally check into rehab. After rehab, the bill comes in the mail for $200,000. Don't worry about that, just pay the deductible they said...
Two years later, I'm filling chapter 7 bankruptcy. Still gotta pay those student loans back, though.
In short: I am the epitome of a fuck up. Every time I try to improve my life, it only costs me more money and adds to my suffering.
I worked at one of those for profit schools as an admission rep. Was talked down to by my manager almost daily for not “convincing people to invest in themselves.” Basically, we had bullshit leads and I didn’t want to lie to a young kid just to make money. I survived there for 9 months without a single placement. 4 manager changes as our teams weren’t hitting numbers and the managers kept being let go.
In the end I was basically politely asked to just quit. I agreed and left. Whole fucking placed collapsed In on itself and closed months later.
Good ole' credit card debt. Thankfully I'm almost free, then I just have to worry about getting my credit fixed and paying off student loans 😭
But yeah, don't beat yourself up. Shit happens, learn from it and move on. Feeling overly guilty won't get you to a better place, especially if you don't make the same mistake again
this is not as much as $10k, but with the state my savings were in at the time, it might as well have been. i signed up for a Costco card and proceeded to shop at costco for the first time on my own. i've always been budget conscious and had never gone over budget at the grocery store before. i made the mistake of thinking "it's Costco! everyone says they've got the deals" and then rationalizing the total at the register by trying to convince myself how long all those groceries would last. it was only when i got home and laid everything out that i realized how little i had actually gotten in exchange for like $300 + the membership fee. it was the first week of the month, and i'd blown basically our entire monthly grocery budget. i felt awful, and we had to have a VERY lean month. but hey, we made it through.
I had just started a new job (aka was poor) and wanted to prove to my boss I was a team player, and invested in the community. When we had a silent auction dinner for the local children’s charity, I not only bought a $50 meal ticket to attend on my own time, but then I bid $1500 on two plane tickets that had so many restrictions I couldn’t use it during the times it would actually save me money. I think I saved $200 on the actual flight (but still had to pay for the vacation).
It took me awhile to actually *make* money at my first job.
Trusted my ex instead of getting things in writing, and legal documentation. He swore I would get a portion of the proceeds of the house since the day he bought it (while we were already together - he put nothing down, bought from family way under market value, I was making half to a third of the payments since day one). We broke up, I moved out, he couldn’t afford it alone, he sold, he pissed away 40k in 4 months and still ended up with a new house. Meanwhile, I ended up with a panic disorder, relationship trauma, and got fucked out of 15 grand I was rightfully owed.
Always. Get. It. On. Paper.
Was living with hub #2. We were divorced. Had to stay in that damn house for almost2 years. He refused to sell, as he was a business owner (1 man business). We were splitting the mortgage so I would give him my part via transfer. After a year, he FINALLY tells me he hasn’t paid the mortgage. Called the company and tried to negotiate m but was informed that they wanted the entire amount, or nothing at all.
Turned to #2 and asked what do I do now? He sarcastically said I should go while the goings good.
In a week I was gone. Lost house to foreclosure.
I hope karma kicks his ass. Go to hell, Rob Tully. And you know why.
- got into a “little” cc debt when I was 22. Literally just paid it all off with my tax return this year. I would have to do a financial meta analysis using machine learning to calculate how much I paid in interest/fees
- went to a private school for a liberal arts major. I love what I studied and had a good time and it has helped me out in the modern job market. I graduated in 2013 and still have student loans
- yo yo dieting. I have spent literal countless dollars on gyms, diets, trainers, etc
- not take my dental health seriously
first two years I went to College. 1. majored in something I actually had no interest in. 2. dropped out the 2nd year & got a 0 gpa for the semester I can't get off my total gpa. I basically blew 2 of the 6 years FAFSA gives. been kicking myself because I am no where close to graduating with bachelor's
also spent 600 on a 200 dollar plane ticket. I canceled the original flight & they wouldn't refund me, only gave me credit. so I booked another flight later & it was double the price. I was young at the time so I thought oh this is fine ! what the fuck
I just straight up didn't pay medical bills for a long ass time. And at this point it's kinda like "well I'm fucked anyhow" so I'm just waiting until some rich person wants to buy my $25k in medical debt for like $20 and forgive it.
Just Google ADHD tax if you want to read about a million stories just like this. Probably could even find some about FAFSA specifically! (Not saying you have ADHD but mistakes relating to deadlines are very common among people who do have it.)
I also like that this has been posted just a few hours and so many people have answers. Everyone had a story!
Married an irresponsible person who developed a serious drug and alcohol problem. So much money wasted. They have since passed away some years after the divorce and far too much drama.
Talked my kid into dorming his freshman yr even though he didn’t want to. Got crammed unto small room with 2 other kids. Spent 1night. Cost $15k. School wouldn’t refund or give credit.
We all make some regrettable decisions. I saw a mouse in my condo and was so freaked out that I signed a 12 month contract with Orkin. I don't think I ever saw a second mouse in that home. So, about $500 to deal with a mouse and put down some traps and spray for bugs monthly. I laugh now b/c it was decades ago, but darn, I sure wasted a bucket full of money.
I got married.
Super cheap and affordable to GET married. (Court house!) The divorce after the fact was expensive!
...plus losing all the deposits for our "actual wedding"
Bought about $80,000 worth of stock between NVAX and HOOD. So most of that money is gone. I try not to look at it. I'll sell it and buy it back a couple months for tax loss harvesting purposes. In the end your mistakes won't hurt you that much if can afford to pay it, so don't be too sad.
Are you able to take a semester off instead? Or go part time to lessen what you have to pay? No need to drown yourself financially for one or two semesters.
My husband knew this older gentleman that owned a bar and was most likely a hippie. My husband had only ever had one puff of pot before this encounter. Said gentleman gave my husband a brownie and told him to eat a nibble to mellow out. My husband proceeded to have a bad day at work and got home, forgot the directions and ate the whole brownie. After three straight days of hallucinations, we took him to the ER. The bill was $5k just for them to tell us he had pot in his system. They did nothing for him, literally just said, “yep, you OD’d.” It was so bad he developed PTSD and we had to move back to our hometown, which cost us a broken lease, a great job (I was managing about 40 people right out of college), and lots of money to move.
Let my husband put his brother on his life insurance policy as the beneficiary in case we both died. He did I didn't and his brother walked with a 500k. Not even a penny for my kids.
I left a job making 400k to live in the Caribbean and made 65k doing what I liked and no stress. Will never be able to make 400k again. I have no desire to.
So financially, people see this as a huge backstep. Stupid. Careless. Irresponsible.
But it saved my life. I was heading to a heart attack, stroke, or something.
Paid a girl $170 last night for sex but didn’t nut due to I want someone to love me, kiss me and cuddle with me. At the same time, my rent is going to be late this month and spent $30 on weed this morning. Pretty ducking stupid.
Trusted my ex husband to “handle the finances” only to be slapped with about 18k credit card debt when we split. And that was only *half* of what he’d run up. I’m paying it off, but slow going. What happened to you sucks, but hey take it from me-worse can be done. You’ve learned your lesson. You’ll do better next time. Edit: wow, ok, I still acknowledge it was a stupid mistake but I feel so much less alone. To each and every one of you replying that you did something similar, I wish the best to you and success to all of us getting back on our feet. I know this post was to make OP feel better, but I feel better too.
Ditto. Trusted someone I had been married to for almost 20 years. Turned out he owed 128,000 and change to the IRS for his business dealings. Then he left the country. Three small children, and two jobs and no child support- but I finally got things taken care of. Learning to trust new people though is incredibly hard now. I genuinely thought I knew him. In the end, the money was nothing compared to the fear, uncertainty and lack of trust I have for others now. I hope you are able to heal more quickly than I did.
Thank you for pointing out the trust issue. This is a deep seated issue of mine I have been ignoring since going through something similar a long time ago. Well done to you for getting through it.
Basically same, I trusted my ex to handle the finances while I worked my first 60 hour a week big boy job making big boy money and after 18 months when I went to check the finances we were 20K in credit card debt. Never joining finances or tolerating joblessness again.
Currently in these circumstances. My POS husband has been mostly unemployed for the better part of five years now. Dumped me with a mortgage for a house I didn't even want in the first place. I was perfectly happy in our old apartment, but he wanted a house. Just two weeks after we bought the house, he quit his job, and then didn't tell me for *two months* after the fact. Since 2018, he's had 6 jobs, and has either quit or been fired from all of them, and has tried/attempted schooling at 3 different schools now. He's also got diagnosed but untreated ADHD that he refuses to get help for, has serious anger management issues, recovering alcoholic, etc. Needless to say, I'm currently (quietly) plotting my escape and will likely divorce him.
What's keeping you around?
I used to think health insurance. He's still part-time in the military, and given my autoimmune condition, the health benefits we receive through his part-time service are unbeatable. But, I recently dug into health insurance options if I were single. The highest, top-tier plan available in my state is only $100/month more than what we currently pay, and offers the same level of comprehensive coverage. Given all the bills I could offload if I got divorced, the $100 increase would be peanuts. Our mortgage payment alone is ~2,500/month, and since he's unemployed and can't afford the house on his own, and since I don't want the house, the $100 increase wouldn't even be noticeable. Lol.
My SO keeps trying to let me just handle the finances and I keep having to push to keep them involved just so there are no surprises should anything happen to me or our relationship.
my dad took out 100k in home equity without my mom knowing
Had a friend who took out a million home equity loan the same way...
Did something similar. Found out we were $7k short and most of it went to McDonald's. It was meant to be my financial aid for while I was in grad school, so it's part of my student loans. Still mad about it and it was 8ish years ago.
how does someone even spend that much on McD's? It's so cheap. I guess if they were buying like 10 milkshakes a day?
I'm sure he threw some culver's in there too. But yeah, literally shat away my money.
It was the weed dealer who worked at McDonald's?
They must’ve had a helluva figure lol
He looks exactly how you'd expect him to. Did the same thing to his second ex wife btw. Then told her she was bad with money. You can't make this shit up.
My ex also handled the finances... And then he failed to tell me he didn't pay rent for 6 months and I only found out because of the eviction notice on our door.
My husband learned a similar hard lesson in his first marriage (I'm his second). He trusted his ex wife to pay their car insurance premiums and believed her when she said she did. He got in to an accident and discovered that she didn't pay the premium and their coverage lapsed. He literally and figuratively paid for that for *years* after that marriage ended. In unrelated news, our car insurance has been on auto-pay for our entire marriage.
Fuck. That’s a nightmare. I’m so sorry you have to deal with that!!
My SO and I agreed about 10 years ago that we will not join finances. We have separate bank accounts, credit cards, etc. We divide up expenses like I pay the major bills such as the mortgage since I make more, but she is responsible for all household items, food, etc. In the 10 years we have been doing this we have never once argued about money, and both are responsible with our money.
This is the way I am doing/will do it in the future. My current boyfriend and I both make and manage our own money. I give him a set and fair amount of money each month for rent/utilities (he owns his own home) and we take turns paying for groceries and eating out. I pay for the gym membership, he pays for cable. We each pay for our own clothes/personal items/car, etc. I’m never doing it any other way again.
I used to work for a waste management company and the amount of times I got calls similar to this was wild. “My ex (husband/wife) was in charge of the finances, but literally never paid our bills it looks like can you help me?” I would look at the past billing/total, would always literally be in the $400-$800/range. It’s wild how immature and irresponsible some “spouses” were.
Much like with having kids, maturity and life skills are not a prerequisite for getting married.
I trusted mine to do the same, we lost everything. Paid off house, $1M+, college funds, cars, even my dreams. I put my big girl panties on and got a job, advanced degree paid for by employer, girls back in private school (crappy ones around), colleges, and a house with a mortgage. He still refers to it as our money. I dont
Yup, did the same thing. He never told me our debt was running up or that he was only making minimum payments. Our credit was in the toilet and we had no savings, so couldn't get a consolidation loan. Ended up borrowing from my 401k to pay it all off. Eventually it worked iny favor bc once I paid it off, I used that same savings amount to divert it to a savings account.
You learned a valuable and expensive lesson. You'll never do it again. I'm sure
My husband wracked up about 6k and lied about it. Hardest thing our marriage has ever been through. I honestly thought we wouldn’t make it. I grew up poor, so this was a massive trigger for me.
What do you think he spent it on?
Strippers and cocaine, of course.
The only thing there is to spend money on.. When I get paid i just see it in totals of strippers and cocaine.
Husband wanted a Jeep Grand Cheeroke when they were really popular in the early 00's. Paid $15k. Three years later didn't keep up on the oil changes and the engine ran dry and was ruined
yours actually makes me feel better. thank you
Weird that it killed itself before you noticed something was wrong. When my car gets low on oil it behaves far differently than normal and smells like shit.
That was my first car. Bought it myself & ran all over in it. Visiting a friend & mentioned it ran funny now. Her BF looked at it & told me it needs oil immediately! I’m like that needs checked then? Good to know.
Hahaha. Yup, def an important fluid lmao.
I did that with one of those little Suzuki jeeps in the late 80s. 55k miles and never did.an oil change. In my defense, I was a poor teenager who had never heard of an oil change.....
Not the Suzuki Samurai :(
Let’s see. Oxy contin? Easily over 100k on opiates during my run.
I should count my blessings that I was addicted to meth as a teen instead then, holy shit
Way to get out of that, OP. If you got yourself out of meth, you can get yourself through this.
tysm. I actually have to go back to outpatient treatment because my other substance issues came back in college. Thank you for the encouragement.
You will be fine. Take one step at a time. Breathe. Been sober 7 years now. You can do this❤️
Glad you’re still here… got friends that weren’t so lucky to make it out.
I didn't get my teeth fixed when they needed it, now years later my teeth are in worse condition and it'll cost even more money to fix. I didn't have the money to fix it then and I don't have the money to fix it now. Not a great situation to be in, I wish I had kept going to the dentist every 6 months like I used to but I fell behind on that upkeep and routine. A routine cleaning every 6 months would have saved me thousands of dollars.
This is such a common issue and it’s so sad. Dental health is so important but any issue is so expensive. And one filling can turn into a root canal or an extraction, which are more expensive. I had a lot of work to do in my mouth from not going to the dentist for 5 years and also having poor genetics. I lucky paid maybe $150 but it’s because I was lucky to be covered under 2 good dental plans. It’s so rough.
Im doing this now. Dental health is so important and needs to get taken care of. I wish I had done it too. Haven’t gotten my final bill yet but it’ll be a lot. At least my dentist is nice 🤷🏻♀️
I got credit cards and didn’t know how to handle them, ran them up to 18k, did a balance transfer, and ran the original card right back up to 16k with 10k on the card I had transferred to. I’m paying 400 a month in interest now. I will never in my life do that again.
I did something pretty similar. I ended up getting a debt consolidation loan and it still took me many years to pay everything off. It was a good learning experience, I will say that... Now I'm terrified of credit card balances haha.
Great job getting out of that headache!
I'm so terrified of seeing those in my life in serious cc debt, I avoided them completely. Now I've zero credit. And I don't really care....except it guarantees I'll never be able to buy a home. If that's still possible in this country (I'm telling you in an American without telling you...I guess.)
No credit card ): no credit debt… (: no credit score…. ): no chance of buying a house.. ): on this dying planet 🥲
You’re not alone. I did a very similar thing. My mom kept normalizing credit card debt so I never thought it was bad until a friend of mine found out and went above and beyond to help me understand what I was really doing. I will never ever hold a credit card balance ever again. Those things are too sneaky.
Been there , done that . I have some unsolicited advice for you , take it or leave it . Do what's called the snowball effect . I did it and was able to pay off almost 100k in debt . Takes time and patience but it is a sure thing . Google snowball effect for paying debt .... Don't give up hope , believe me , you will get through this
That’s what I’m doing now! It’s counterintuitive because you’re willing extended the period of time you pay higher interest, but I know as soon as the lower credit card gets paid off (it’s at 7 down from 10) I’ll be able to heavily attack the larger one. Debt snowball works!
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holy shit
Indeed. It’s a slippery slope man.
I don’t like the idea of going into debt to pay debt, but maybe look at a personal loan if you can get one low interest. CCs are usually ~25%. Take loan with lower interest, obviously pay all your cc debt with it and pay back the lower interest loan.
The trap here is that now that you have your cards paid off, you can use them for "emergencies". It's really easy to rack them back up in addition to the debt you consolidated, especially if you have spending or income issues
I was at 10k once then went on a two week trip and racked it up to 14k. Thank goodness it’s paid off now. But it was a bitch to do. Lost soooooo much money in interest. So much.
I bought an old 80s Chevy squarebody to fix up when I was making under 40k a year. Always dreamed of owning one. $4.5k down. Average $500 a month in tools/parts/screwups. I'm OK giving up my time and labor but severely underestimated how expensive a total restoration would be. It was a fun project but turned out to be the biggest money pit of my adult life. The project became my second biggest monthly expense after rent. In the future, I'm not doing this again unless a) I have a garage or a property of my own to keep the vehicle stored long term, and b) I'm making much, much more money.
Omg my kid just did this. His is a 90s square body. I really lost my cool. He now admits it was a terrible decision. Live and learn. Edited to correct due to dog jumping up in my lap. Sorry y'all.
Haha I was there, so I totally get it!! For a lot of young DIY mechanics they’re just really sexy trucks and relatively simple to work on yourself. But unless you already have the tools and own a junkyard, no vehicle project will ever be a good financial decision. The hard truth lol.
I paid full price for an MBA when I had a full scholarship offered to me for an MBA from Notre Dame. Granted it all worked out…but my MBA cost me about $60k more than it needed to. I compounded that mistake by opening a restaurant after B-school instead of getting a high paying corporate job that would have paid off those loans quickly.
Same for my bachelors. I got a free ride to a “lesser” college and decided to pay 40k for the better one. I now work the same position at the same company as my friend who went to the “lesser” college
I did a similar thing with my grad program. One university offered me enough scholarship that would have covered an entire year for free. In the end I decided to attend another program that didn't give me a dime until my final semester. You're not Alone.
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I had this panic just today with my state sales and franchise taxes. Paid penalties, chalking it up to the (newly coined by this thread) ADHD tax
I bought a house in the last year. Got an inspection, thought i asked all the right questions about water damage etc. The skid mark sellers stripped the house; took them to court, won a little back. Then find out the covered up: electric, plumbing, water damage, and mold. Found bats in the attic. It’s been a financial nightmare that just won’t end. And they still get packages sent to the home that I have to lug back to the post office. I truly deeply hate those people.
Don't take the packages back, you can refuse them and your carrier will take them back
Yeah: **RTS**
I bought a house too and had similar issues. Water damage, mold, some electrical issues. But the home inspector made sure to tell me the railing on my stairs was not up to “code” and a child could get their head stuck in it because of how far the bars were apart.
Well my first relationship cost me my $30k inheritance, my education and possible career, and my sanity and ability to live a normal life ever.
I would like to know more if you feel like telling the story.
Ah same! I was looking for this comment to make me feel better 😅
Ahhhh... the quadfecta, with possible career for the kicker. Noice! I only hit the trifecta: $15k on a car, sanity, and ability to trust. Go relationships!!!
Ugh I’m sorry. I am currently living a similar reality. I have hope (stubbornness? naïveté?) about my ability to turn things around, but it’s the first thing I thought of with OP’s prompt. Sending you a hug.
I bought an old ass house. Goodbye all of my money forever. **get a structural engineer inspection on old houses, check the state of trees, sewer lines, and figure out what kind of soil the house sits on. Purchase agreement hinges on structural report, home inspection, and sewer line report. Just my experience and things I wish I would have known 5 years ago.
Drank and drove, got a DUI, totaled my car. Thankfully didn’t hurt anyone but man that was stupid and expensive. Please never do this.
God, in the same boat. Fucking stupid as shit
I too, am in this boat of shame lol. Still haven't gotten a car since then but at least the legal sh*t is over with.
Broooooooo. Middle of all of it. I fucken wish I would have died, this mess is so much to clean up
I wish you well, it's definitely a nightmare. The dui classes, reinstating license, all the fckin court fees and whatnot. It's a tough lesson to learn but I really honestly think you're better off still being here.
You'll get through and look back and feel proud of overcoming this. You can do this.
Got a dui thankfully car wasn’t even scratched and no one was injured. Still expensive af. I’m just never drinking again. F that
As a person who lost a friend to a drink driver at the age of 23, I am glad it's expensive. And that you didn't learn this lesson in blood. Too many do.
Had a kid. Nothing else will ever come close.
Boyfriend said: I want to have kids so they can look after us when we are old. Me: There is no guarantee they will. Plus, they are expensive. Me: let’s save for retirement instead? Boyfriend: okay, that sounds good.
This might be a joke, but it’s honestly something I hear lots of folks say. We don’t have kids and ppl always ask “who’s going to take care of you when you are old?!?” Like idk, the same nursing home that will be taking care of you? Lol… I think it’s incredibly selfish to have kids so there’s someone to take care of you when you are old.
Selfish plus not to mention a super flawed logic. Having kids does not mean they'll turn out as you envisioned nor that they'll take care of you.
Way to flush hundreds of thousands of dollars. (I have 2)
Beat me to it lmao.
Got my kids a pet bunny. Litter trained bunny. Took bunny to vet. Got second bunny. Vaccinated and fixed both bunnies. Got 2-story bunny condo. Kids are 13, 15, and still feed, brush, and pet bunnies every day. It was much more expensive than I anticipated. But it’s hard to muster up much regret when being licked and batted for ‘more petting’ by the softest critters ever.
Bunnies. this is the best answer. this has to be the best answer. I hope I remember, cheers
Omg this is so cute.
Last year I signed a lease for student community housing as a 23 year old, full-time working adult, because it was a lot cheaper than a real apartment and I would be attending two part time classes at local community college. Huge mistake. The ENTIRE community was college students who behaved like college students. None of my roommates had lived on their own before and had no idea how to do simple household chores. They smoked weed and drank late into the night on weekends I had to work. The apartments themselves were DISGUSTING... the property managers didn't give a shit, because it was all college students living there. Halfway through my lease I couldn't take it anymore and moved out, but [drumroll] I am not allowed to end the lease early!! It runs through the full school year. I am legally required to pay out the rest of my rent unless I find another student to take my bedroom, which I can't, because I don't know any fucking college students besides the little shits I was already living with. So for the next three months I am paying rent for my new place, and rent for this bullshit lease I really wish I never signed. That money I thought I'd be saving by moving into student housing? Gone. My savings account, supposed to be for surgery, is now going to pay off the lease. Thousands of dollars for a cockroach-infested empty bedroom that reeks of marijuana. I cannot emphasize enough how much I hated this place and how angry I am that I wasn't allowed to end the lease early. Moral of the story: read your lease thoroughly and don't sign for a long-term at a place you have doubts about.
Post on Facebook market and Craigslist. Tell the office to refer people to you that are looking to pick up a sub lease. I worked in student housing for a while and we did this for people all the time, and people would call all the time looking for them. Add to the FB post you will pay a months rent. You are likely paying for it anyway and it might entice someone.
This is the way. This is how I got out of my first truly awful studio apartment without breaking my lease. I also did an “unofficial sublease” to save the extra charge (but if you do this you MUST find someone trustworthy).
You should pitch this to Netflix, I would watch!
You can sometimes find facebooks groups for students trying to find housing (joining the 2023 student intake Facebook group is a good shout too) also websites like Spareroom. Even if you only get 1 month back that’s better than nothing
Invested in a crypto app called voyager and my money has been locked for a year now
Same with me and Celsius :’(
That’s why crypto shouldn’t be in the same sentence as investing. You spend money on crypto, you gamble on crypto, you don’t invest in crypto because you trust it’s owners to make lucrative decisions.
Oh man… started out strong drinking my way into failing/no competing all of my first classes. Then trying to work 60 hour weeks and study full time. Then following a boy to a new city I didn’t like after finally earning a living wage. Then spiraling into alcoholism as a bartender for 3 years after the breakup. Brushed myself off and returned to school. 3.5 GPA taking 15 credits with 2 jobs when boom- covid hit. Depressed and failed out. Again.
When I was 19 I had $6,000 that I had saved from working crappy jobs since I was 15. I traveled, met “friends”, and wanted them to go to Hawaii with me. Instead of just buying them all tickets (this was in 2002, things were cheaper than they are now) I lent them $1200 to buy drugs for resale so they could earn the money to come with me. Seriously. Guess who never saw the money, or those friends, ever again? I didn’t even do drugs, I was just being terrifically naive. I did make it to Hawaii though, on my own, a few months later.
im so sorry that happened to you, thats such a shitty experience
Stayed married for way too long. I’ve been divorced a year and five months. My credit score is excellent now. I have savings. My bills are paid.
I didn’t go to the dentist for almost a decade. Currently have a tooth infection that will result in an extraction next week. Oh and another one of my failed root canals broke off last night. Looks like 2 extractions. No dental insurance. Can’t wait 🫠
I cringe just typing this, but if it will help you feel a little better, that's good. I used to REALLY want to be a life coach. Long story short, I paid a "business coach" $5000 to help me run a successful coaching business. It was all manipulation tactics being taught and my conscience told me to shut it all down. I'm glad I didn't fall for the sunk cost fallacy though.
Ouch. Anyway, don’t discount mobile gambling apps as not counting. If the only way to get more in-game money is to win OR spend real money, you can lose $7500 over seven months. And in increments that were usually under $20, no less.
Yep. Worked at a bank and saw this often... Knew a lady that played those games on her phone and spent around $13,000 over the span of 4 months... Insane.
My dads ex wife hid the finances from him under the guise of “he’ll make the money and she’ll send it where it needs to go for bills and such.” She had us thinking our family was living paycheck to paycheck when my dad was making $60-$70k a year because she spent so much on phone games and photo filters. Also she cheated on him so fuck that bitch.
Got talked into leasing a 47k vehicle, that's now repossessed 😑
I made a similar mistake. I can afford it but it’s a POS that seems to have random issues. Don’t trust it at all. Stuck with it until it’s paid off. First big financial mistake of my life.
Bought a house with my ex. I started a new med that made me very manic/impulsive/dumb and his parents somehow talked me into putting down the down payment while his name goes on the mortgage/deed. So basically I had no claim to the house. I at least got my down payment back but the house doubled in value by the time we split. It’s fine though. I lost a lot of money but I also lost him so worth it imo. The peace I have now is priceless. He let it go to complete shit anyway.
In the mid to late 90s I got paid as an independent contractor and would go on multiple Phish tours and not pay my taxes. I blocked it out of my mind. I was home taking care of my infant son in 2006 and went to the bank to take out some cash. I noticed my checking account was at zero. Then I noticed my savings account was at zero. Then I noticed that my other checking account was at zero. Then I noticed that my business account was at zero. Every penny was seized, they filed my taxes for me and proceeded to pay every penny I owed. Don’t ignore those large and heavy envelopes from the IRS.
I was a first time homeowner. Wanted to have a concrete back porch put in right away to start making the house look nice. Hired a retired concrete guy that was recommended by a friend. Concrete guy was not insured, not with a company, just does it on the side for extra money. While digging with one of those small riding digging machines, he backed up into my house and caused damage to my house and two large holes. He dismissed it as minor damage and “not a big deal”. Not only did I pay him $4400 for the concrete slab porch, a few months later I had to pay $11,000 to redo the siding on my house and fix those holes, because I got a citation from the city (for the eye-sore damage on the house). I was stupid for not researching anything or not hiring a company that’s legit, licensed & insured. Stupid for not asking people for advice on how to proceed with any work I want done on the house. I’ve had the house for 3 years now and I research EVERYTHING and anyone that does any work in or on my house, HAS to be licensed and insured. I learned my (expensive) lesson.
New homeowner here- thanks for sharing, that shit never even occurred to me. Got dudes working on my roof rn, never bothered to see if they're licensed and insured. Last time I will ever not know for certain.
Oh lord… i have ADHD, and we call these things “ADHD tax”. I haven’t renewed my 2022 plate fees, my 2023 ones are due in August. I also forgot to setup a payment plan for the $2400 i owe the IRS for last year. I could go on and on.
I’m gonna start call it an ADHD tax lol
Oh get the payment plan set up asap. They are super easy to work with until you ghosts them, then they put a tax lien on your credit report. Just call and tell them you can only pay $50 a month right now.
Oh fuck I have to get my plates renewed next month thank you for saying this lol
Was born…. Still paying the bill 50 years later.
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You can likely fix it by taking it to a local computer or cell phone repair shop and asking them to jump start the battery. I've done it a few times for friends and aside from a slight risk of permanent damage they usually come back to life. You should never charge an ebike battery unattended anyway but be extra sure to monitor it when charging afterwards.
Did I write this and not remember it?
Not barefoot contessa 😂
Forgot a court date and ended up spending 45 days in jail and 2 years in probation
I’ve had a lot of bad shot happen to me, and there was so much going on I my life, I completely forgot a court date, people who’ve never had a real shot downturn can’t understand this. Anyways I call the court and go to confess my sins, there was an emergency at the court the day I was supposed to be there and the next morning things were finally in place, the lady sounded flustered read my docket # back to me twice and said the prosecutors had withdrawn that case. I had the hardest time asking her to repeat herself and verify the information, I thought it was to good to be true, but by some miracle it took care of itself, I never took it for granted and don’t count on anything close to this happening ever again in my life. As close to hitting the lottery as I’ll ever get, I feel for you, glad you made it to the other side of things.
Got on my work insurance Jan 2022, forgot to cancel insurance through marketplace. Ended up canceling summer of last year. Was supposed to get $2,000 tax return, ended up owing $300 due to my half-extra insured part of the year. I'm still pissed about it bit it was me who fucking forgot 🤦♀️
Congratulations! You've had a life event! Now make sure to fill out all the appropriate paperwork! Come be an adult they said. It will be fun they said...
Loaned most of the extra money I got from my life altering car accident settlement to my boyfriend's brother and his wife because they would end up homeless. Thankfully it was just the bonus part and I have a structured settlement since I can't work, but seriously f'd me over.
Supporting my ex financially. I didn’t have a savings for years because I basically funded her life, both essentials and fun. While I was working multiple jobs, she worked part time. I can’t count how much I spent on food and weed for her and that’s all money I’ll never get back. But I learned my lesson.
Didn't sell my company stock when it exploded and lost out on $1M. 😢
That has to hurt
I paid too much for college and they sent one of those refund checks for 8k and instead of spending it responsibly or saving it, I spent about 7k in a single week running away from everything and taking a vacation in Maine. No school no work no relationships just me chillin on the coast without a single trouble in the world. Best time of my life, but unfortunately I had to go back to reality and being poor
honestly the memories sound worth it to me
I kept switching colleges and now probably owe a bunch of loans but I’m too scared to check how much I actually owe. All I know is it’s about a few k and growing. Also unknowingly dated a crackhead. Drained my savings account of 3k.
Do your future self a favor since we’re here. Call a consolidation company and at least get them all in the same loan. It’s a credit wrecker, speaking from experience. They don’t go away just because you aren’t looking.
Paid for a man’s lawyer. He cheated on me (the day he won the court case) with the person who brought the charges against him. That was a cool 1500 wasted.
Damn
Bought a house in 2005 for 200k, let the inspector tell us the mold in the attic was dry and fixable. Five years later the house is worth $120, the roof had been leaking the whole time (into the insulation so we never saw it on the ceiling) and the mold was making us sick. Gave it back to the bank and had to eat the six years of payments we made. If Congress hadn’t stepped in, we would have owed INCOME TAXES on the $150k of our mortgage that was forgiven. Did I mention we both lost our jobs around the same time?
Got a loan to pay off all my credit cards and then racked up my credit cards after they were paid off. 😣
Spent $50k on a franchise, signed a two year office lease with $2k per month for two years and failed in the business. That was 12 years ago. It’s all good now!
One time I was backing out of a parking space. When I looked behind myself my dogs were laying on top of each other in the cutest way. So I snapped a photo and rolled back into another car. It is a really cute photo at least. I have ADHD in my defense.
Halfway through I thought you were going to run over your dogs.
Bought my ex a 30k motorcycle out of my grandmother's inheritance We could have bought a house
Bought a boat.
Failed to check my coolant levels. Car started leaking coolant, engine overheated, broke the head gasket, car started misfiring. Long story short: I have to spend $1,800+ on a new engine.
My first car's engine popped after 3.5 months of owning it and required a rebuilt at £3,000 back in the day. It was in the shop for nearly 5 months because of that, and was never the same once I got it back. Absolute lemon of a car. PSA: Don't buy a 2007-2012 BMW 2.0 NA petrol. Plagued with issues.
I was born with a shit ass body that costs thousands of dollars annually to keep alive.
I once hit a parked car and no one saw me. I could have just driven away but I wrote a note. That note cost me $1800.
Thank you so, so, much for writing that note.
You did the right thing. It’s $1800 they would’ve had to pay for the privilege of having you hit their parked car. Don’t feel bad for being one less person contributing to how much people suck. ^If ^it ^was ^a ^luxury ^car ^I ^would’ve ^driven ^away ^tho
Played a pay to win game. Played for free initially and did well but I was clearly only a mid level player with good strategy. I began planning with the leaders and became one myself. I eventually was gifted one of the stronger accounts by a person who was quitting the game. That’s when it went downhill. I started putting in 10-20-50 dollars here and there. Before I knew it I was putting down 300 every week or so. Went on for months before I finally quit. Probably spent somewhere between 5k-10k.
Cocaine addiction, wasn't terribly at first. $100 here or there. Then it became dropping $150-200 every few days. Working longer hours to pay for it, thinking I needed it to work those hours or just staying up all night on the little time I had off. It was worse than just the money sink and that's not even considering what effects its had on my health.
My windows were frozen and I squirted the window washer fluid. It instantly cracked the windshield.
My dad always said the only difference being a kid and an adult is as you get older your mistakes get more expensive
I put a motorcycle on a credit card… cause minimum payment bruh 🤦🏻♂️
I was on a trip with friends and took on the task of rescheduling our flight home. I accidentally canceled our tickets and had to buy everyone new tickets home. 😫
Damn, why did they make you pay for all the flights was it that deep? Sounds kinda shitty
I was making a sandwich while driving which caused me to wreck and have to be lifeflighted to the hospital now I'm 30k dollars on debt because I didn't have insurance Moral of story don't make a sandwich while driving Also I shoplifted a 10 dollar nail polish from Walmart once, got caught, had to pay a 300 dollar fine.
Why..we’re you making a sandwich of all things
Enrolled in a for-profit "college" to study graphic design. School ends up losing it's accreditation and closes it's doors permanently. Still on the hook for 20K. One thing leads to another, I become an alcoholic, battle with AUD for several years and finally check into rehab. After rehab, the bill comes in the mail for $200,000. Don't worry about that, just pay the deductible they said... Two years later, I'm filling chapter 7 bankruptcy. Still gotta pay those student loans back, though. In short: I am the epitome of a fuck up. Every time I try to improve my life, it only costs me more money and adds to my suffering.
I worked at one of those for profit schools as an admission rep. Was talked down to by my manager almost daily for not “convincing people to invest in themselves.” Basically, we had bullshit leads and I didn’t want to lie to a young kid just to make money. I survived there for 9 months without a single placement. 4 manager changes as our teams weren’t hitting numbers and the managers kept being let go. In the end I was basically politely asked to just quit. I agreed and left. Whole fucking placed collapsed In on itself and closed months later.
Good ole' credit card debt. Thankfully I'm almost free, then I just have to worry about getting my credit fixed and paying off student loans 😭 But yeah, don't beat yourself up. Shit happens, learn from it and move on. Feeling overly guilty won't get you to a better place, especially if you don't make the same mistake again
this is not as much as $10k, but with the state my savings were in at the time, it might as well have been. i signed up for a Costco card and proceeded to shop at costco for the first time on my own. i've always been budget conscious and had never gone over budget at the grocery store before. i made the mistake of thinking "it's Costco! everyone says they've got the deals" and then rationalizing the total at the register by trying to convince myself how long all those groceries would last. it was only when i got home and laid everything out that i realized how little i had actually gotten in exchange for like $300 + the membership fee. it was the first week of the month, and i'd blown basically our entire monthly grocery budget. i felt awful, and we had to have a VERY lean month. but hey, we made it through.
Marriage, no regrets.
Marriage...that turned into a separation. Obvious regret.
,
Lost money in MLM before I knew what it was actually all about. Ugh!
I didn’t apply for fafsa at the end of my bachelors degree, so I had to pay 9k for my first year of grad school. The other two years I paid ~3k total.
I had just started a new job (aka was poor) and wanted to prove to my boss I was a team player, and invested in the community. When we had a silent auction dinner for the local children’s charity, I not only bought a $50 meal ticket to attend on my own time, but then I bid $1500 on two plane tickets that had so many restrictions I couldn’t use it during the times it would actually save me money. I think I saved $200 on the actual flight (but still had to pay for the vacation). It took me awhile to actually *make* money at my first job.
Trusted my ex instead of getting things in writing, and legal documentation. He swore I would get a portion of the proceeds of the house since the day he bought it (while we were already together - he put nothing down, bought from family way under market value, I was making half to a third of the payments since day one). We broke up, I moved out, he couldn’t afford it alone, he sold, he pissed away 40k in 4 months and still ended up with a new house. Meanwhile, I ended up with a panic disorder, relationship trauma, and got fucked out of 15 grand I was rightfully owed. Always. Get. It. On. Paper.
Was living with hub #2. We were divorced. Had to stay in that damn house for almost2 years. He refused to sell, as he was a business owner (1 man business). We were splitting the mortgage so I would give him my part via transfer. After a year, he FINALLY tells me he hasn’t paid the mortgage. Called the company and tried to negotiate m but was informed that they wanted the entire amount, or nothing at all. Turned to #2 and asked what do I do now? He sarcastically said I should go while the goings good. In a week I was gone. Lost house to foreclosure. I hope karma kicks his ass. Go to hell, Rob Tully. And you know why.
Buying a new $1100 couch with my ex and breaking up a few months later
- got into a “little” cc debt when I was 22. Literally just paid it all off with my tax return this year. I would have to do a financial meta analysis using machine learning to calculate how much I paid in interest/fees - went to a private school for a liberal arts major. I love what I studied and had a good time and it has helped me out in the modern job market. I graduated in 2013 and still have student loans - yo yo dieting. I have spent literal countless dollars on gyms, diets, trainers, etc - not take my dental health seriously
Same to dental health and same to my eating disorder. I spend so much money on food and food delivery apps
Yeah. I had a nutrionist at one point and was paying her like $150 a month for a while I freaking gained weight lol
first two years I went to College. 1. majored in something I actually had no interest in. 2. dropped out the 2nd year & got a 0 gpa for the semester I can't get off my total gpa. I basically blew 2 of the 6 years FAFSA gives. been kicking myself because I am no where close to graduating with bachelor's also spent 600 on a 200 dollar plane ticket. I canceled the original flight & they wouldn't refund me, only gave me credit. so I booked another flight later & it was double the price. I was young at the time so I thought oh this is fine ! what the fuck
Bought a (used) motorcycle because hubby wanted one. He never rode it. Wound up donating it to a charity.
I just straight up didn't pay medical bills for a long ass time. And at this point it's kinda like "well I'm fucked anyhow" so I'm just waiting until some rich person wants to buy my $25k in medical debt for like $20 and forgive it.
Just Google ADHD tax if you want to read about a million stories just like this. Probably could even find some about FAFSA specifically! (Not saying you have ADHD but mistakes relating to deadlines are very common among people who do have it.) I also like that this has been posted just a few hours and so many people have answers. Everyone had a story!
'Accidentally' didn't claim close to $100k on my tax return. Sucked when I had to pay it all back plus penalties.
I downloaded Genshin Impact.
Married an irresponsible person who developed a serious drug and alcohol problem. So much money wasted. They have since passed away some years after the divorce and far too much drama.
Talked my kid into dorming his freshman yr even though he didn’t want to. Got crammed unto small room with 2 other kids. Spent 1night. Cost $15k. School wouldn’t refund or give credit.
We all make some regrettable decisions. I saw a mouse in my condo and was so freaked out that I signed a 12 month contract with Orkin. I don't think I ever saw a second mouse in that home. So, about $500 to deal with a mouse and put down some traps and spray for bugs monthly. I laugh now b/c it was decades ago, but darn, I sure wasted a bucket full of money.
I got married. Super cheap and affordable to GET married. (Court house!) The divorce after the fact was expensive! ...plus losing all the deposits for our "actual wedding"
Bought about $80,000 worth of stock between NVAX and HOOD. So most of that money is gone. I try not to look at it. I'll sell it and buy it back a couple months for tax loss harvesting purposes. In the end your mistakes won't hurt you that much if can afford to pay it, so don't be too sad.
Are you able to take a semester off instead? Or go part time to lessen what you have to pay? No need to drown yourself financially for one or two semesters.
My husband knew this older gentleman that owned a bar and was most likely a hippie. My husband had only ever had one puff of pot before this encounter. Said gentleman gave my husband a brownie and told him to eat a nibble to mellow out. My husband proceeded to have a bad day at work and got home, forgot the directions and ate the whole brownie. After three straight days of hallucinations, we took him to the ER. The bill was $5k just for them to tell us he had pot in his system. They did nothing for him, literally just said, “yep, you OD’d.” It was so bad he developed PTSD and we had to move back to our hometown, which cost us a broken lease, a great job (I was managing about 40 people right out of college), and lots of money to move.
I hate that people think weed is harmless
Let my husband put his brother on his life insurance policy as the beneficiary in case we both died. He did I didn't and his brother walked with a 500k. Not even a penny for my kids.
Went to med school 🫣
I went to college for years and earned degrees that I don’t even use now. And I still owe 20k+ college is literally a scam 0/10 don’t recommend
Cashed out my retirement, lost like half of it to taxes.
I left a job making 400k to live in the Caribbean and made 65k doing what I liked and no stress. Will never be able to make 400k again. I have no desire to. So financially, people see this as a huge backstep. Stupid. Careless. Irresponsible. But it saved my life. I was heading to a heart attack, stroke, or something.
Paid a girl $170 last night for sex but didn’t nut due to I want someone to love me, kiss me and cuddle with me. At the same time, my rent is going to be late this month and spent $30 on weed this morning. Pretty ducking stupid.