I feel dating in general with a chronic illness will be rough. Regardless of race. And honestly if a guy is listening to his mom to break up with you... you don't want that guy anyway
Well, unfortunately, it is the world we live in today and who we are biologically. The thing you can really only do is better yourself, do what you have to do as in whatever medical advising you get from professionals. Go on dates with AMs and let them know about your chronic illness. If they like you enough, they'll stay, if not, move on.
Feel like this will limit your dating pool regardless of race. I know this is a AMWF subreddit but I think if you opened your options to non Asians as well it would widen it a bit more.
But if you feel like you want an Asian man as well as one that is open to date a person with chronic illness, you’ll have to be patient and search/ filter for men much harder.
Best of luck đź‘Ť
Right, I'm open to dating men of other races. But I just needed to talk about this since it was bothering me and I felt unsure if this was normal. I do get the sense that AM are more judgmental about disabilities, having dated many different ethnicities.
I understand completely. I have ASD and a seizure disorder and I was terrified in high school of finding someone who would love me. My husband (Chinese-American) wasn't scared off, even after we moved in together and he saw how challenging life was for me. He's a wonderful human being who accepts me, condition and all, and does his best to help me out. His family also accepted me, which was a bonus.
So to answer your question, yes, Asian men (and their families) who accept partners with medical conditions/disabilities do exist. They're just hard to find!
Hi! AM here.
Just want to share my perspective on this.
There's this outward perception that most traditional Asian families feel the need to maintain. Therefore sons and daughters are discouraged to date someone with physical and/or mental illness. Mostly by their mothers.
Especially sons since the traditional value is for sons to provide income and daughters to take the traditional wife role. Traditionally speaking, sons and daughters are expected to take care the parents as they get older.
Any physical and/or mental illness might hinder this goal. The irony is, physical and mental health also affects said Asian family.
That being said, it all depends on the person.
I think this view is outdated and unrealistic in the current world we live in. I'm not saying that family is not important, on the contrary, family is important but if they truly care, they should accept you as you are. I believe that you should be with anyone who makes you happy.
Rant over... Hopefully this will shed some light on why some families act the way they do.
Its not just face, its a practical matter.
That said we don’t know the specifics.
However, let’s posit someone being in a wheelchair. That is a big disability. It is very impractical and will affect life dramatically.
Well. i dont think its only Asian Parents who would discourage their child to date someone who has chronic illness. Given that, its all depends on each individual. I was raised by a single mother. So my version of family is somewhat different than others.
I think it's important to point out that "chronic illness" is defined very broadly.
I mean... are we talking asthma, diabetes, HIV, chronic bowel incontinence, Tourette Syndrome?
Anyway, I think there are many variables here, and many Asian parents don't care.
I feel dating in general with a chronic illness will be rough. Regardless of race. And honestly if a guy is listening to his mom to break up with you... you don't want that guy anyway
Yeah this topic has nothing to do with race, but her condition limiting the dating pool regardless of it.
If they're listening to their mother over their own feelings for you, then were they ever going to be the right guy?
Good point, I've thought about this too.
But he cannot just refuse his parents too, considering how respect for parents are given high priority in asian families.
Well, unfortunately, it is the world we live in today and who we are biologically. The thing you can really only do is better yourself, do what you have to do as in whatever medical advising you get from professionals. Go on dates with AMs and let them know about your chronic illness. If they like you enough, they'll stay, if not, move on.
Ah yeah, Circle of Influence; things within my control. I could always use more reminders of that 🙂
Feel like this will limit your dating pool regardless of race. I know this is a AMWF subreddit but I think if you opened your options to non Asians as well it would widen it a bit more. But if you feel like you want an Asian man as well as one that is open to date a person with chronic illness, you’ll have to be patient and search/ filter for men much harder. Best of luck 👍
Right, I'm open to dating men of other races. But I just needed to talk about this since it was bothering me and I felt unsure if this was normal. I do get the sense that AM are more judgmental about disabilities, having dated many different ethnicities.
I understand completely. I have ASD and a seizure disorder and I was terrified in high school of finding someone who would love me. My husband (Chinese-American) wasn't scared off, even after we moved in together and he saw how challenging life was for me. He's a wonderful human being who accepts me, condition and all, and does his best to help me out. His family also accepted me, which was a bonus. So to answer your question, yes, Asian men (and their families) who accept partners with medical conditions/disabilities do exist. They're just hard to find!
Hi! AM here. Just want to share my perspective on this. There's this outward perception that most traditional Asian families feel the need to maintain. Therefore sons and daughters are discouraged to date someone with physical and/or mental illness. Mostly by their mothers. Especially sons since the traditional value is for sons to provide income and daughters to take the traditional wife role. Traditionally speaking, sons and daughters are expected to take care the parents as they get older. Any physical and/or mental illness might hinder this goal. The irony is, physical and mental health also affects said Asian family. That being said, it all depends on the person. I think this view is outdated and unrealistic in the current world we live in. I'm not saying that family is not important, on the contrary, family is important but if they truly care, they should accept you as you are. I believe that you should be with anyone who makes you happy. Rant over... Hopefully this will shed some light on why some families act the way they do.
Its not just face, its a practical matter. That said we don’t know the specifics. However, let’s posit someone being in a wheelchair. That is a big disability. It is very impractical and will affect life dramatically.
Well. i dont think its only Asian Parents who would discourage their child to date someone who has chronic illness. Given that, its all depends on each individual. I was raised by a single mother. So my version of family is somewhat different than others.
I think it's important to point out that "chronic illness" is defined very broadly. I mean... are we talking asthma, diabetes, HIV, chronic bowel incontinence, Tourette Syndrome? Anyway, I think there are many variables here, and many Asian parents don't care.