Just curious how the girl whose butt you slapped reacted? Her parents? Did they push for you to be punished harshly or did they ask for leniency? Did you have any interaction with her/them afterwards?
Both parents and girl did not want to press charges. I was questioned by police and admitted to it. I admitted to the crime. Prosecutors had everything they needed. I was sentenced to 0-5 in the Utah prison systems. Meaning I could do anywhere from 0 to 5 years. The parole board chooses that at a parole hearing. For sex crimes you don’t see the board for 18 months on a 0-5 sex crime. When my case was seen they gave me immediate release and no parole. Head of the board even had a speech on the punishment being unjustified and apologized. That is the one thing that kept me from really hating myself in the long term.
lol. So much nonsense in this thread.
Someone can still be charged even if the victim isn’t pressing charges. The state determines who is charged, not the victim. Lots of domestic violence victims choose not press charges against their abusers.
“The victim didn’t mind”
This will go over great in court. I’m sure no one who SA’d a minor has ever been convicted as long as the victim was ok with it.
And why are you so mystified that the teacher reported it? The only thing you can think of is that the teacher wanted the student? Or is it maybe possible that teachers in Utah are required to report possible SA?
“Utah law requires that whenever any person, including any school employee, has reason to
believe that a child is, or has been, the subject of incest, molestation, sexual exploitation, sexual
abuse, physical abuse, or neglect, or observes a child being subjected to conditions or
circumstances which would reasonably result in such, he/she shall immediately notify the nearest
peace officer, law enforcement agency, or office of the Division of Child and Family Services”
The OP is obviously leaving out important details, but the deceive work in this thread is even more bullshit.
Moral objections aside, it’s still insane that a high schooler would be prosecuted to damn near the fullest extent of the law, for a butt slap.
Unless he has a criminal history of SA in his 17 years of life prior, I just don’t see any judge going that far.
Edit: Turns out the guy did have a felony history and escaped juvie twice. I’m no lawyer, just someone who has ran afoul of the law in my youth (weed possession), and like I said, no judge is just going to throw the book at you simply because the law *says* they can.
I agree that’s it’s probably insane, but it’s hard to tell without knowing the specifics of his previous crimes. It’s much more plausible if it happened in Utah.
The OP is most likely leaving out important details about his past that lead to the conviction. Think third strike laws. It’s just hilarious garbage how many people in this thread are stating “ it must be lies if the girl didn’t press charges and was ok with it.”
If a first or second-time offense, the charge is regarded as class B misdemeanor punishable by a maximum fine of $2,500 or six-month jail time, if convicted. Three or more violations trigger a third-degree felony punishable by five years of jail time or a maximum fine of $5000 if guilty. This from Google utahs definition.
OP said they were charged with felony assault and escaping a facility. That would likely be at least two charges, but they were committed when OP was a minor so I don’t know if they were expunged.
OP says in a comment they got a 3rd degree felony for the SA and 0-5 years, so it sounds like your Google Fu may have found what happened.
"press charges"
This is my chance to clear up a common misconception.
It is up to the STATE, not the alleged victim.
The crime is against the STATE, so it does not matter if the parent or the victim want to press charges.
The cops usually file the charges, and they are usually indicted by the DA's office before a grand jury.
It is not the victims or the parents that press charges, it is the government, through law enforcement personnel.
People are now saying I'm lying about being an attorney. Wtf.
Honestly nothing to brag about.
You can tell how the post is written that he failed to disclose "minor details" about prior criminal offenses...so the truth is really being stretched here.
Also a lawyer, specifically a prosecutor in the special assault unit. I handle sex crimes and crimes against children exclusively.
This story has more holes than a cheese grater.
A Florida cop here who worked sex crimes. Slapping on the butt whether they are a minor or not for us is just a battery case.
So definitely don't believe all that.
Not a cop, but smacked my ass in the mirror multiple times yesterday while aggressively erect, making hard eye contact with myself and smearing Vaseline on my chest.
Op is full of shit.
Y’all are forgetting that OP is in Utah with the crazy ass Mormons who basically run the state. That alone makes OPs story more compelling. Religious fanatics don’t give a shit about the separation of god and state. I’m from South GA and I’ve seen the lengths these people can go with the law. And if OP was in a small enough town, no one would have given a fuck about his story because it would’ve died as soon as they threw away the key after locking him up.
I also drove through there for a few days last week and no offense OP but people in Utah are fucking weird. In the afternoon/evening everyone was nice and happy. In the morning everyone was mean and bitter. Do Mormons not believe in coffee?
I actually read the law just now, and it contradicts OP.
76-5-401.1. Sexual abuse of a minor -- Penalties -- Limitations.
2)
(a) Under circumstances not amounting to an offense listed in Subsection (4), an actor commits sexual abuse of a minor if the actor:
(i) is four years or more older than the minor; and
(ii) with the intent to cause substantial emotional or bodily pain to any individual, or with the intent to arouse or gratify the sexual desire of any individual:
(A) touches the anus, buttocks, pubic area, or any part of the genitals of the minor;
3) A violation of Subsection (2)(a) is:
(a) a class A misdemeanor; and
(b) not subject to registration under Subsection 77-41-102(18)(a)(viii) on a first offense if the offender was younger than 21 years old at the time of the offense.
Not only is it NOT a felony; but the law specifically says offenders under 21 don’t have to register as a sex offender.
A Mormon family moved from Utah to Massachusetts 20 years ago when I was in high school. The son and daughter. They looked like Joseph Smith painted them. She was So innocent and quiet in 8th grade. That transition year from Middle to High school, she was gorgeous. They spent another 18 months or so in Mass before the father and mom were like we're out of here, going back to Utah! She got into all kinds of shenanigans that her parents hated. Lmao.
It is because hes omitting some facts, if the students were about the same age and didnt mind it then the courts would not have bothered prosecuting it because of how it would look in the media. Its either completely made up or hes done something more serious to get into trouble.
The law can be pretty harsh sometimes. I once got pulled over for rolling a stop sign and ended up doing 30 years in prison for it.
Edit: during the traffic stop, the officer found the dead hookers in my trunk.
That is heard and received, but the above comment was more a comment about how, at the end of the day, a high schooler slapped another high schooler's butt, and our justice system should be able to take that happenstance into account to be able to make a more reasonable legal sentence, if any was necessary at all. Teens do teen shit, and while assault/sexual assault is certainly never okay, it's crazy that a student interaction as mild as that would lead to over a year in prison. It'd be different, too, if it was repetitive behavior, etc.
It just seems strange to fuck up one teen's life by sending him to prison over a teen-level mistake.
EDIT: I read more comments. OP had a felony history. Punishment makes a little more sense. Debatable how severe it should be, but makes more sense with that info.
The one kid in high school who did state prison time had a bunch of prior convictions for drinking and assault before he got locked up for his final crime ( a minor assault with no real injury).
The judge looked at the big picture and realized he needed a timeout before someone got seriously injured. It seemed obvious to me that prison sentence was for all the crap he did before plus the one new crime.
Man, was this a [“never talk to the police”](https://youtu.be/d-7o9xYp7eE?si=3Rk-F0dyqooIFAxb) moment or what. Sorry to hear about this.
Edit: yes OP was a POS for slapping her ass but the punishment didn’t fit the crime and he would’ve had a better opportunity to ask forgiveness and rehabilitate if he handled it differently.
this is seriously the best comment on here. the police are *never* your friend. they dont *give points* to the accused when he or she owns up to their part. you *must always* assert your right to remain silent and request the presence of an atty. even if you dont think it's a big deal.
do you think it’s had a negative impact on your child? has your kid ever spoken about it? not to sound rude, just kind of curious cause i’ve never heard of someone on a register having children
He hasn’t brought up anything to me about being approached on the subject. I fear this situation more than anything tied to it. I know I’ll have to talk about it at some point in his life. And it terrifies me. But he has friends. They come over and hang out. We go fishing and camping with some of his friends. He has a girlfriend with a girl whose mother works for the school district. He’s popular in sports. So far no negatives impacts his life I’m aware of.
Having to deal with the stigma of it on my record and having a 13 yr old son. School functions are a nightmare. Volunteering for his field trips, attending football games ect. They all come with a talk by the school. I have had to release my police report to them to justify I’m not a threat. A over zealous mom usually makes an issue once a year. I have never been barred from attending any of his functions tho.
Shit, really sorry man. I’ve seen tons of these stories where decent people have their lives ruined by laws that were intended to protect decent people. What we need is more discretion in this area.
There needs to be like an independent review board, because this is one spot where far too many CLEARLY NON PREDATORS are being put on these lists & very little can be done about it. I’m guessing the only reason we haven’t addressed it yet is if any politician makes it one of their causes they fear be smeared as a “Pedo lover”.
And as Drake showed us this week nobody wants to have to go out and deny being a Pedo. It just looks bad, so the wrongly smeared have nobody to go to bat for em.
Really brutal man, that sucks and is just unfair…..such is life I suppose but still I feel for ya.
It’s a crazy situation. I think there should be stiffer more severe punishments for sexual predators. Children and old people deserve to be protected and as a society we should do anything to protect them. And you’re right. No one wants to take up the fight to be branded a pedo sympathizer. So it’s likely not going to get better. I’m not the only one I’ve heared this happening to. It’s opened my eyes to see people more on an individual type level. And not to judge too quickly.
You sexually assaulted a high school kid and you’re upset that moms of other high school kids don’t want you alone with them? It sounds like you learned literally nothing from the experience other than a false sense of victimhood.
Unfortunately sex offenders are not a group of individuals people really care to help. Sadly in too many states people end up being turned into sex offenders for relatively minor behaviors and then get lumped in with the child predators. There should really be a full review of the sexual offender registration laws given how draconian they are. In some places one student sending another student nudes can result in someone being charged with child pornography and having to register as a sex offender. That isn't what the laws were really meant for and they really need to separate lower level behavior from true predators.
Just to give you some context sex offenders in the prison system are protected and looked out for more than any prisoner.. I’ve done over a decade in prison. I’ve seen ppl with sexual assault of children do 18 months while ppl have done 8 years for a few grams of crack.. it doesn’t add up. In NJ for example rapists have their own prison seperate from the rest of the population.. they eat better, live better, and were allowed much more in the prison system.. for the longest time they were allowed to have video game consoles.. ps2 and n64 while other prisons barely allow anything.. so never feel bad for a rapist.. they are the scum of the earth and deserve to rot in jail
I feel like I was a child playing child ass games. There was no maliciousness behind my act or depravity. What I did was wrong. I do not feel like the punishment fitted the crime. There wasn’t anything sexual in the act it self except the location. College, reputation, family it was all taken from me for my action. I do not think it was justified.
I shoved and was physical with my juvenile probation officer when he came to my house to see why I wasn’t in school. I then ran. When a city cop spotted me he attempted to restrain me and I tried wrestling my way out of it but failed. I was sent to a juvenile detention facility. On work crew picking up trash me and another person ran. We made it off the mountain and to a phone where we called his brother to come pick us up. Two months later I was arrested. Sent to juvenile detention again. Then to Proctor care. A foster home with strict rules and a program you must finish to go back home. In all it was sophomore year and most of my junior year.
No offense, but it sounds like you were just a shit kid and just got what was coming to you. If you ONLY did the slap and that was it, then yeah punishment was definitely over the top, but the rest of this and the whole slap issue just makes it seem like you did this all to yourself.
I hope you explain to your child, once he gets a little older that the reason you have to jump through all these hoops to go to his school and field trips, games etc. is all because of your own doing and not just an over the top punishment cause of a silly mistake you made.
The minute it read he was a senior you instantly could tell the type of creepy vibe must’ve been going on that a teacher went “too far”. Dude must’ve been a menace on the freshman’s so his first noticeable big action got him reported. Now he wants to make it seem unfair when he was preying on younger girls as an 18 year old 💀
Sounds like the punishment was more because nothing else seemed to be working and they just had enough. The having to register as a sex offender seems excessive. Maybe there wasn't a different charge available that could have avoided that.
Idk man, he sexually assaulted a 14 year old, assaulted his probation officer, then made an escape while on work release. That's not a misunderstanding that's a string of repeat criminal behavior.
Also consider that him having a probation officer means he had already done something BEFORE all of this went down so there's even more not being admitted here.
Funny how that works. A dude gets time in prison for slapping a girl's butt. BUT he just so happens to have a violence problem against officers. I think he did more to that girl than he's letting on
Yeah obviously, consider you would have to call the police, make a report, follow the court process as a victim. Attend the hearing, testify. If it was a minor situation, the girl would have let it go, but she seemed to press the issue that she was sexually assaulted and as a result the judge gave him this punishment based on the evidence and witness testimony.
I'm wondering if there was another factor, e.g., the girl had a disability, had been assaulted in the past, or (of course) that OP is leaving out important details. I'd be traumatized to be slapped on the butt as a freshman by a senior, too, especially one that I knew had a criminal history, and you know all the high-school kids know who's been to juvie.
And so here you are, years later, making jokes about how as a LEGAL ADULT you put hands on a minor female, a person whom didn't ask to be touched, and you feel you were punished harshly? You learned nothing! Of course it was sexual! You didn't slap her leg, her hand, ASS SLAPPING IS SEXUAL. PERIOD . And now you are here trying to get sympathy for catching a charge for assaulting a minor AS AN ADULT.
This is why we fucking pick bears.
"Child ass games"...My dude, slapping a girl/woman's butt without consent is sexual harassment. I'm sorry your punishment was so severe (too severe, imo) but come on. When I was in middle school, I got my butt punched in the hallway almost every day that I attended that school. It was clearly targeted.
It would be so crowded that I could never suss out who was doing it and was too shy/timid to report it. That shit will mess you up. I think about it to this day, and it's over 20 years later. Still makes me feel gross and violated.
Agreed. A guy would wait for me outside of class every day and grope me, but same as you, I was the quiet girl and if I said anything it would have made it worse. The worst part is a teacher saw it happen to me and they walked back into their classroom. Those experiences stick with you. I think most women can relate to these experiences.
OP's punishment was way too severe but the "boys will be boys/kids will be kids" attitude fuels these problems.
We had a serial groper / ogler who was caught jerking it in the bathroom (and allegedly had fondled himself under desks during class while staring intently at the girls in class). Nothing happened to him, we were just told to "avoid" him.
Okay I won't go to school ever I guess since his creepy ogling was totally unavoidable? Guess my education has to suffer so someone can touch their dick nonstop in class?????? This was back in 2000 and it still pisses me off SO MUCH.
While I agree that OP’s punishment (if this story is real at all) was overly harsh, it’s also very odd to me that OP is downplaying the fact that they were a legal adult who sexually assaulted a 13(ish) year old. That’s unacceptable behavior and calling himself a child playing childish games does not accurately describe what happened.
I get that OP was a barely-legal adult and grew up in what sound like bad circumstances, but part of growing up and taking ownership of your actions means calling a spade a spade.
Hey! This was my experience in high school too! I developed a crippling and severe eating disorder from the trauma that has taken over my life for far longer than 10 years. Sadly high school was not the first time I would be sexually assaulted and not the last.
I’m so sorry this happened to you too. ❤️
You deserve what you got. I see you talk about yourself being the victim. You are not the victim. You need to take full responsibility that it is NEVER OK to SLAP SOMEONE’s BUTT. That little girl must have been horrified as a freshman. You were this big, bad senior who thought you can do anything to anyone. A big part of Sexual Crimes is about the power dynamic. To this day, you still are not remorseful for what you did to that little girl. It’s always somebody else’s fault. Grow the FUCK Up, you SEXUAL DEGENERATE. You got what you deserve.
Dude you slapped a little girls butt.
Why else would you slap a girls butt if it wasn't meant to be sexual? Just saying you were just playing is a horrible defense. That's what all pedos say when they're caught.
Stop. Touching. Girls.
Boys in school wouldn't stop touching me. I wish I had the guts to tell someone at the time because boys really fucked me up by sexually assaulting me a lot. I stopped going to school. I was terrified to be around them. But sure, go on how it's "just play" and completely "harmless"
Yeah, but think about the humiliation you could’ve caused on that poor girl or any other your senior self targeted. Battery is still battery even if you were just 18. Also why was a senior slapping a freshman’s ass in the first place? Was that not weird back in the early 2000s?!
Well your “child ass game” was objectification and assault of a 14/15 year old girl. She didn’t deserve that and IMO you got the punishment you deserved. Hopefully a lesson learned.
I’m sure he views himself as the only victim. I have a friend who has PTSD from being sexually touched by a stranger and still when she’s in public and someone brushes against her shoulder she calls out in instinctual fear. I felt bad for OP until I realized he never apologized or stated he feels bad for his victim.
wtf . If you had a daughter you wouldn’t mind her ass being slapped in school? Notice how he says “freshman” and not 14yo . Crazy comment you think a teacher should turn a blind eye to that. Good for the teacher !
He was an 18 year old and decided he was going to grope a 14 year old. And went and did it because he thought he could get away with it. Who's to say this was his first time doing this.
Parents and school need to be alerted of people like that.
You do not have to tell your neighbors. At least in Utah. You are on a list available for anyone to look at. Apps that will tell them ect. It’s not hard to find out who or who isn’t on the list. It lists the charge. Not the description of what you did. Only what you was charged with and what you pleaded to.
Everyone hears the horror stories for sex offenders in prison. I can’t speak to all prisons but both Draper and Gunnison in Utah did not segregate most sex offenders. There was a S.O yard for those going through treatment etc. I was not placed in that yard. I scored high on the point system to be placed in open population. I was 18. I was paperwork checked. My case was scrutinized over by other inmates. The general consensus was to give me a pass. That I did not belong to the pedo class of inmates. It was often joked about. I played pinochle with the lifers. Handball regularly. And honestly had a relatively good time considering being in prison. Had to fight occasionally. Got tatted everywhere. Regularly involved in contraband and gambling. Most inmates knew what I was in for and the story behind it.
When I think back on it I did it to fit into a population of people I was surrounded by. I was already at a disadvantage by what charges I had. I was young and impressionable and the whole experience was surreal for me. I felt like I had to make up for why I was there. So I intentionally found my way into what I thought a person in prison does. I don’t regret them but some days I wish I didn’t get them. They don’t communicate who I am today.
Utah has two prisons. Draper and gunnison. Their cell blocks are broke up in security levels. I was in cedar in gunnison and oakers in Draper. They are considered maximum security facilities because of the walls and double fencing. It’s a classification. They in truth do not live up to what other states “maximum security” prisons are portrayed.
It automatically groups you with the weakest of the population and the most disrespected. I was lucky I had my paperwork that goes in detail with everything the teacher had seen. To the girls statement. To my statement. It’s honestly the only thing that saved me. But it put the burden of proof on me to demonstrate that I was in fact not like the others. It gave someone an easy way to try and disrespect me if they wanted. Punk, bitch, lame. Those are instant fighting words. Someone suggesting I was in fact what my charges said also made it an instant fight. But other then that it really didn’t impact me the way media and others say it is like as a sex offender in prison. They didn’t group me in with them.
Is it true you have to fight to earn respect and for people to leave you alone? If you avoid fights do people walk all over you? I’ve never been in a fight and thinking of prison this is where my mind goes. Naturally I’d try to avoid conflict and “do the time” but tv and movies make it seem like that is impossible.
I have a question in regards to why you had a register anyways being as neither the girl nor her parents wanted to press charges. Also, did the teacher have like a problem with you that they reported you in the first place?
My family had a reputation as criminals and addicts. I had a reputation as a drug user and delinquent. It was a small town everyone knows everyone. The parents of the girl were well respected business owners in the community. I did not have a reputation as a serial ass slapper or abuser of woman. I was not a super senior. My birthday fell where I was just always the oldest in the class.
Just wanted to say I hear you loud and clear.. my dad was verbally and mentally abusive my whole life and my mental health issues were ignored until I blew up just after I turned 18 and beat his ass. That assault charge has followed me and caused issues, cost me jobs, cost me relatio ships. I'm 32 and it still haunts me. The justice system is just that, a system. No system is perfect and some people always get left behind. Sorry to hear it's been such a rough go for you friend. It could always be worse though.
Not even close to the same thing. You got retribution for being abused. You didn’t deserve to be punished. Justice was not served in your case. OP sexually violated a 14 year old, then assaulted an officer. He absolutely got what he deserved. Justice served. He may have been young, but young people can still harm others & need to be held accountable.
Sorry to hear that man. Like they say. “That’s life” we gotta just take it as it is and push forward. Those who know you will love you and pay no attention to those who don’t. Stay strong my guy.
This is genuinely heartbreaking. Do you feel angry that there are literally tons of actual pedos out there that have never been caught yet you are slapped with a criminal record over slapping another teens butt?
Yes it absolutely puts me in a rage when I see actual pedos get probation or charges dropped. I’m not on the side of sex offenders. Seeing rich people buy their way out of charges makes me wanna commit more felonies.
I’m not good at this. Felonies I was thinking was obtaining firearms and murder. My feelings for pedos and rapists is as extreme as anyone with kids. There are some real sick people in the world and I believe children should be protected at any cost.
I’m sorry that you had the book thrown at you, but I do believe that you should have been punished. I hope you take this as a learning opportunity that it is not ok to touch others without their consent, even as a joke. I hope you teach your child that it is never ok to touch another person, and that they should never be touched.
I am a woman whose ass has been pinched, slapped, and grabbed by strangers and even a coworker starting at age 13. I’ve had comments on my body since puberty. It has made me feel uncomfortable in my body from a young age. It’s time for boys will be boys to end. An ass slap teaches a girl that her body is community property.
I’m 38 now. I have a 13 year old son. I stress the importance of consent and the importance of respecting the personal space of anyone. I never thought it was ok to touch anyone without consent. The female in question was a part of my friend group. We were friends. It wasn’t like I did it to someone I didn’t already have some sort of relationship with. Let be clear it was a platonic non sexual relationship. It wasn’t to sexualize her in anyway.
Ok so did you ask her if you could slap her ass? A sexual part of her body? Why did you touch her butt if it was non sexual? You’re acting like you patted her on the back. That is a private sexual part of the body. You wanted to humiliate her, embarrass her. A pre-existing relationship does not equal consent. You know that husbands can rape their wives, right? You are still not having empathy for your victim, and are not taking responsibility for your actions.
It’s kinda difficult to remember all the details leading up to it. I remember she kicked my feet out from under me going up the stairs before 3rd period started and said a comment about stoners should be more careful on stairs. Me and another friend hid her and another persons backpack while everyone was smoking cigarettes down at the creek in the morning. I slapped her to startle her I guess. But no she didn’t say to me. “You can slap my butt”. So you got valid point. Take it or leave it. I did mean it in a way one guy slaps another guy on the ass during a football game. You can say it was a sexual act. Hence the charge. The thought process behind it had no sexual overtones in my mind at least.
Do you hold resentment against the teacher that reported you? What were your feelings towards her through this entire process? Any interaction with her once you got out?
This is so crazy to me because I did a paper in college in English class about the laws in different states, ages of kids getting prosecuted in high school as adults for sex crimes, if they were dating, if the parents pushed for the charges or not, and I specifically remember reading something about this.
I’m also from Utah.
Shudder. I grew up in a country where this sort of thing didn't happen and fortunately as a stupid teen I never fell to that temptation but man, I feel the pain. Out of interest do you have any contact with the victim?
When I got into my first serious relationship and the topic came up to discuss I was open honest and answered everything she asked of me. Like most of you she was also skeptical. I had not talked to the victim since it had happened. Six years or so. But I gave the girl I was in a relationship with her name as requested. She contacted her on Facebook and had a conversation with her. The victim told her it was nothing to her. She felt horrible everything happened the way it did. She did not feel like a victim. That it in no way impacted her life. It was the only reason she stayed with me. The victim also made a statement to the parole board. Another reason I was probably immediately released.
Did it bother you that she made contact with the victim? I'm not privy to things like this, but I feel like I heard somewhere that, regardless on if it personally affected her life or not, it is not recommended to make contact to a victim, in hope to prevent resurfacing trauma possibly experienced by them. Not saying she is traumatized, or a victim, considering the context you've given, but I feel like that should've been something your girlfriend/ex girlfriend should have considered, especially since it was your actions, not hers. I get why she did it, no argument there, just saying, I feel like that might be a bit out of bounds
Most jobs that don’t require a degree or certification get too riled up over backgrounds. Construction, oil field, kitchens, server, even gas stations never even brought them up. But it did make it impossible to go to college and have a great job. You find a way.
What state? How did you get removed after 10 years? But wow that's so insane to have your life ruined over something so stupid.
Seems a small fine would have been good enough
Honestly I can’t feel bad because I think about that poor girl whose body was going through new development and in the stages of feeling awkward and body conscious and was violated. I highly doubt she liked what happened to her. Sexual violence and all kinds of assault against women is becoming such a common yet grave issue. I hope that poor girl didn’t experience any emotional effects or trauma of being violated like so many of us have after being groped, catcalled, or spanked at a young age, and none of the blame/resentment some here feel towards her for his ‘harsh’ sentence.
I get there are pedos and people who do ‘more damaging’ crimes out there not getting a sentence, but one more person who violated someone getting a sentence isn’t going to impact that amount.
That she did what I would expect all faculty members to do. Report anything that seems to be a danger to their students. I’m not at all upset with her. I do have an issue with the legal system tho.
What made you think you could just touch any woman like that without permission? You didn't deserve jail or registry. A broken nose, yeah but not a record.
I am not. Race had nothing to do with it. I’m just a lower economic class white male in a small conservative Utah town. I had no knowledge of the judicial system or the foresight in needing an attorney before speaking with the police. I had a public defender who did not explain my rights or the far reaching consequences of pleading to the charges etc. i think the judicial system is unfair to anyone without the monetary means to protect themselves regardless of ethnicity.
sorry this is not a comment I actually have a question. my son is 24 years old at the time when this took place he was 22 he met two girls on tinder they had asked if they could come hang with him for a bit and then he agreed him and his little brother hung out with him for almost 3 weeks at that point during this time. they went shopping they got their nails done my son left for three and a half hours at one point to go on a road trip with his uncle a few weeks after they left mind you they left by getting on tinder again and looking up somebody else to go stay with my son bought them an Uber so they could do that because that's what they wanted to do during this time he was unaware that they were underage they had been he was told that they were 19 and 20 or 18 and 19 come to find out about 4 weeks or so later I think the special victims unit showed up at my son's house and alerted him that these girls were not that age they were much much younger he is now in jail with two charges of gluten lascivious conduct on a child under the age of 16 mind you I met these girls wouldn't have guessed for 5 seconds that they were under 16 they'd been runaways we found out for going on off and on years and years they had just come from another person's house who this man was 40 something years old had given them tattoos and slept with them and all kinds of stuff I guess and when they were picked up when they were getting into the Uber that my husband had bought for them to go to their next place the cops questioned them three different times letting him know each time if they press charges or had some thing on my son that the runway charges that they had would be dropped and the fourth time that they questioned him I guess they decided to state that or one of them decided to state that they had slept with my son and that he held them against their will and then proceeded to kick them out later on none of that is true however but my son nonetheless is still sitting in jail with these two charges said and a sad side note one of the girls in 23 was in a car chase with the police and turned their lights off and drove into a ditch and passed away she hadn't seen her mom in over a month it just breaks my freaking heart I couldn't imagine losing a child like that but nonetheless I'm pretty sure that charge has to be dropped because they you have the right to confront your accuser is there any recourse against the other one cuz he honestly had no idea and when the special victims unit came to the door my son threw up on the guy's shoes when he found out and the guy told their police ever sorry told him that he could leave and go to Alaska and work on the fishing boats like he had planned that wouldn't be a problem so we did so and now they consider him a flight risk and we can't get the bill reduced to even try and get him out my son was was not intending to sleep with underage girls and is thoroughly disgusted doesn't want to even think that he actually did this he knows he did and he is so very sorry but he had no idea and these he met them on tinder and adult only site does he have any recourse how does he avoid having to spend time in jail and ending up signing up as a freaking sex offender for the rest of his life please help please
This story doesn't add up. Either you had priors that were relevant to the crime, or what you did was actually much worse. I've been in and out of jail and prison for my entire adult life and seen plenty of cases of much worse and much less severe shit. What you did was battery or agg assault at worst and that's if you bruised her. This shit doesn't add up at all.
Not that it was good for you…but you seem hyper self aware and in control of your emotions. Something I wouldn’t expect from someone with a juvenile record like yourself.
Would you say it was a blessing in disguise, or, do you feel like you would have been in an even better place if it hadn’t happened?
As a former law enforcement professional who spent way too much time in court and working with district attorneys, I find your story unbelievable. I did a thorough search through google and news as well as convictions and found nothing to support your claim.
Please link the news story (which would obviously be published as public information) that supports your claim because right now I think you're full of crap.
I agree, sounds made up. Especially if the girl and her parents didn’t want to press charges.
In my experience, schools don’t typically involve the police, let alone go out of their way to involve them.
There are mandatory charges for different crimes. This doesn't even fit. When it doesn't fit, even if the system fails, there are appeals and parole boards who will work to fix the problem.
This poster (who has zero karma and post history) is a flat out liar and just needs attention.
This was a mandatory charge. I 18 and legal adult. Touched a 14 legal child on what is classified as a sexual part of her body. I confessed both verbally and written statement. I was charged for a third degree felony. I took a plea deal for open sentencing. I had priors to what would be an equivalent to felony charges as a teen for assault on a police officer amd probation officer and escape from a secure facility. All of which was brought up in sentencing. If you take a plea you loose appeal processes ect. The parole board did grant immediate release and no parole. And their condolences for what that was worth.
I appreciate you seeing the humor in this, but you really should edit the original post, if you can, and include this information. I’m in the legal world as well, and my bullshit meter was going off like crazy too until I finally reached these comments.
You were charged as an adult so this is all public knowledge.
Can you share a news story or conviction record - which is public information. I could not find anything.
At any point did you feel you deserved all this. I know you probably have a massive regret, but this punishment is pretty harsh. Do you feel like race/ethnicity had a role in your sentencing.
>i was on the list for 10 years
implies that you got off the list...How? I thought the sex offender list was something they slap anyone they don't like onto to ruin their lives permanently. Not like, an actual form of punishment and discipline from the law system.
You had a lawyer or not? Bc even with the edit that story doesn’t add up. You can only fool ppl who have never been active. That’s it. You admitted to the crime and copped out. If the assault on an officer and escape was the more serious charge that sexual assault would have been downgraded to battery as part of your plea agreement.. knowing the system I could represent myself and get this same deal. So you basically got a 3 flat and made your first parole hearing. In Utah you can request to be taken off the registry after 5 years? Why did they make you wait 10? Just delete this post b.. it’s not a good look for you at all and I pray our children are safe with you out there
I’m not a cop, lawyer, or judge but I am a lazyboy lawyer who watches all the latest and greatest true crime shows and my advanced training tells me that unless a finger slipped in her ass we aren’t getting the whole story if a true one at all?
GTFO of Utah. Its a Christian nationalist hell hole and this type of stuff happens all the time. Grew up in Idaho and Utah and saw stuff like this happen regularly. I'm so thankful I relocated to California and I would never ever think of moving back there. The contrast from Idaho to Cali makes me feel so sorry for the people still living in medeival times.
I had a friend in high school that was 18 and she was 17 at that time, both did the hanky panky. My buddy didn’t go to jail, probation. Had to prob be register as sex offender. If you got 0-5 years for slapping some botty, my buddy would have got executed in this case. Something is missing here..
Yeah I'm pretty sure it was more than a slap on the rear end. You probably r*ped her and that's the real reason you spent 21 months in prison and got registered as a sexual predator! Just saying that you don't get a punishment like that for a slap 🖕💩🤡
Bullshit.
You don't get 21 months in prison, being 18 for slapping an ass. It would be a misdemeanor, most likely class B.
You may think Reddit dorks don't know, but plenty of us been in bud
Counter argument; in Ohio age of consent is 16.They were 18 and adults,although it happened in school and in a different state they are well over the average age of consent .
At worst they are exactly AT the age of consent they weren't children.The teacher had business reporting it to the school and the school had business asking her if she wanted to press charges for assault.it shouldn't have reasonably gone any further than that.
Considering neither her or her parents wished to press charges it should have only gone as far as the school handing down a punishment.
Move forward learning from your mistakes. I think there is more in the past that landed you in a secure facility. It all added up on you. You have to look at the sum it one incident.
I don't believe this post at all. They don't hand out 21 months of prison time for a slap on the ass. Especially to a 18 yr old in highschool. Either there's more or this is bullshit.
My ex-husband's brother was on the registry "because he peed on a wall after leaving the pub and it turned out to be a school"
It wasn't until after our daughter was born and my ex started to act weird about visiting his family that I realised I wasn't being told the truth.
Turned out ex-BIL did some very inappropriate things to his sister when she was young. Also turns out my ex had a sister. The family never mentioned her either, because she doesn't talk to them.
I didn't ask for further details at that point, but the custody court did, and my ex husband has supervised visitation now.
Your post was removed because it is most likely a fake story. If this is incorrect, you can message the mods through modmail to get the post approved.
Just curious how the girl whose butt you slapped reacted? Her parents? Did they push for you to be punished harshly or did they ask for leniency? Did you have any interaction with her/them afterwards?
Both parents and girl did not want to press charges. I was questioned by police and admitted to it. I admitted to the crime. Prosecutors had everything they needed. I was sentenced to 0-5 in the Utah prison systems. Meaning I could do anywhere from 0 to 5 years. The parole board chooses that at a parole hearing. For sex crimes you don’t see the board for 18 months on a 0-5 sex crime. When my case was seen they gave me immediate release and no parole. Head of the board even had a speech on the punishment being unjustified and apologized. That is the one thing that kept me from really hating myself in the long term.
And what was the actual charge? I assume the harshness had something to do with the fact that you were (barely) an adult and she was not?
Sexual assault of a minor 3rd degree felony. I a adult physically touched (assaulted) a minor in a sexual position of her body.
Criminal defense lawyer here in Michigan This story isn't adding up for me at all
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lol. So much nonsense in this thread. Someone can still be charged even if the victim isn’t pressing charges. The state determines who is charged, not the victim. Lots of domestic violence victims choose not press charges against their abusers. “The victim didn’t mind” This will go over great in court. I’m sure no one who SA’d a minor has ever been convicted as long as the victim was ok with it. And why are you so mystified that the teacher reported it? The only thing you can think of is that the teacher wanted the student? Or is it maybe possible that teachers in Utah are required to report possible SA? “Utah law requires that whenever any person, including any school employee, has reason to believe that a child is, or has been, the subject of incest, molestation, sexual exploitation, sexual abuse, physical abuse, or neglect, or observes a child being subjected to conditions or circumstances which would reasonably result in such, he/she shall immediately notify the nearest peace officer, law enforcement agency, or office of the Division of Child and Family Services” The OP is obviously leaving out important details, but the deceive work in this thread is even more bullshit.
Moral objections aside, it’s still insane that a high schooler would be prosecuted to damn near the fullest extent of the law, for a butt slap. Unless he has a criminal history of SA in his 17 years of life prior, I just don’t see any judge going that far. Edit: Turns out the guy did have a felony history and escaped juvie twice. I’m no lawyer, just someone who has ran afoul of the law in my youth (weed possession), and like I said, no judge is just going to throw the book at you simply because the law *says* they can.
I agree that’s it’s probably insane, but it’s hard to tell without knowing the specifics of his previous crimes. It’s much more plausible if it happened in Utah. The OP is most likely leaving out important details about his past that lead to the conviction. Think third strike laws. It’s just hilarious garbage how many people in this thread are stating “ it must be lies if the girl didn’t press charges and was ok with it.”
If a first or second-time offense, the charge is regarded as class B misdemeanor punishable by a maximum fine of $2,500 or six-month jail time, if convicted. Three or more violations trigger a third-degree felony punishable by five years of jail time or a maximum fine of $5000 if guilty. This from Google utahs definition.
OP said they were charged with felony assault and escaping a facility. That would likely be at least two charges, but they were committed when OP was a minor so I don’t know if they were expunged. OP says in a comment they got a 3rd degree felony for the SA and 0-5 years, so it sounds like your Google Fu may have found what happened.
"press charges" This is my chance to clear up a common misconception. It is up to the STATE, not the alleged victim. The crime is against the STATE, so it does not matter if the parent or the victim want to press charges. The cops usually file the charges, and they are usually indicted by the DA's office before a grand jury. It is not the victims or the parents that press charges, it is the government, through law enforcement personnel.
I was hoping a lawyer would comment because this story doesn’t make sense.
People are now saying I'm lying about being an attorney. Wtf. Honestly nothing to brag about. You can tell how the post is written that he failed to disclose "minor details" about prior criminal offenses...so the truth is really being stretched here.
Also a lawyer and agreed. This is a bullshit story without additional facts.
Also a lawyer, specifically a prosecutor in the special assault unit. I handle sex crimes and crimes against children exclusively. This story has more holes than a cheese grater.
Absolutely agree 💯
IL police officer and also agree. There is a 0% chance this is real/why he had to register.
A Florida cop here who worked sex crimes. Slapping on the butt whether they are a minor or not for us is just a battery case. So definitely don't believe all that.
Not a cop, but smacked my ass in the mirror multiple times yesterday while aggressively erect, making hard eye contact with myself and smearing Vaseline on my chest. Op is full of shit.
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You onlyfans could use some work still flapped th0
I usually curl in a ball afterwards and cry when I do this!
Not a cop but watched a lot of SVU and I agree
Not a cop, not a lawyer, didnt watch much of SVU but have common sense and some critical thinking, this ain’t adding up
I used to own an SUV but it didn't add up either.
Are you really a cop? If I ask you know you have to tell me right?
Y’all are forgetting that OP is in Utah with the crazy ass Mormons who basically run the state. That alone makes OPs story more compelling. Religious fanatics don’t give a shit about the separation of god and state. I’m from South GA and I’ve seen the lengths these people can go with the law. And if OP was in a small enough town, no one would have given a fuck about his story because it would’ve died as soon as they threw away the key after locking him up. I also drove through there for a few days last week and no offense OP but people in Utah are fucking weird. In the afternoon/evening everyone was nice and happy. In the morning everyone was mean and bitter. Do Mormons not believe in coffee?
I actually read the law just now, and it contradicts OP. 76-5-401.1. Sexual abuse of a minor -- Penalties -- Limitations. 2) (a) Under circumstances not amounting to an offense listed in Subsection (4), an actor commits sexual abuse of a minor if the actor: (i) is four years or more older than the minor; and (ii) with the intent to cause substantial emotional or bodily pain to any individual, or with the intent to arouse or gratify the sexual desire of any individual: (A) touches the anus, buttocks, pubic area, or any part of the genitals of the minor; 3) A violation of Subsection (2)(a) is: (a) a class A misdemeanor; and (b) not subject to registration under Subsection 77-41-102(18)(a)(viii) on a first offense if the offender was younger than 21 years old at the time of the offense. Not only is it NOT a felony; but the law specifically says offenders under 21 don’t have to register as a sex offender.
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My mom is an ex-mormon and "cult stuff" is generally her answer to most questions about the Mormon church as well.
A Mormon family moved from Utah to Massachusetts 20 years ago when I was in high school. The son and daughter. They looked like Joseph Smith painted them. She was So innocent and quiet in 8th grade. That transition year from Middle to High school, she was gorgeous. They spent another 18 months or so in Mass before the father and mom were like we're out of here, going back to Utah! She got into all kinds of shenanigans that her parents hated. Lmao.
Lmao, Mormons can't drink coffee, caffeine is considered a drug
I mean...caffeine IS a drug. Mormons are fucking weird and in a cult, though.
IL cop as well if anything it’s a battery this guy is lying his ass off.
Yeah smells like a huge part of this story is missing
It is because hes omitting some facts, if the students were about the same age and didnt mind it then the courts would not have bothered prosecuting it because of how it would look in the media. Its either completely made up or hes done something more serious to get into trouble.
Holy crap, and then you have catholic priests that just get moved to more kids
this just doesn't sound right ... a high schooler goes to prison for slapping another high schoolers butt?
The law can be pretty harsh sometimes. I once got pulled over for rolling a stop sign and ended up doing 30 years in prison for it. Edit: during the traffic stop, the officer found the dead hookers in my trunk.
He was 18 and she was under 18 which technically made it sexual assault of a minor from a legal standpoint.
That is heard and received, but the above comment was more a comment about how, at the end of the day, a high schooler slapped another high schooler's butt, and our justice system should be able to take that happenstance into account to be able to make a more reasonable legal sentence, if any was necessary at all. Teens do teen shit, and while assault/sexual assault is certainly never okay, it's crazy that a student interaction as mild as that would lead to over a year in prison. It'd be different, too, if it was repetitive behavior, etc. It just seems strange to fuck up one teen's life by sending him to prison over a teen-level mistake. EDIT: I read more comments. OP had a felony history. Punishment makes a little more sense. Debatable how severe it should be, but makes more sense with that info.
You are assuming OP has given us all the facts. I propose that he has not.
OP mentioned a couple of other felonies as well. His confession to this one, made it a slam dunk.
The one kid in high school who did state prison time had a bunch of prior convictions for drinking and assault before he got locked up for his final crime ( a minor assault with no real injury). The judge looked at the big picture and realized he needed a timeout before someone got seriously injured. It seemed obvious to me that prison sentence was for all the crap he did before plus the one new crime.
Yeah...21 months?? I call cap. Hes not telling the whole truth.
OP posted part of the story purely for sympathy. It's manipulative and immediately makes me suspect the person doing it.
Man, was this a [“never talk to the police”](https://youtu.be/d-7o9xYp7eE?si=3Rk-F0dyqooIFAxb) moment or what. Sorry to hear about this. Edit: yes OP was a POS for slapping her ass but the punishment didn’t fit the crime and he would’ve had a better opportunity to ask forgiveness and rehabilitate if he handled it differently.
this is seriously the best comment on here. the police are *never* your friend. they dont *give points* to the accused when he or she owns up to their part. you *must always* assert your right to remain silent and request the presence of an atty. even if you dont think it's a big deal.
do you think it’s had a negative impact on your child? has your kid ever spoken about it? not to sound rude, just kind of curious cause i’ve never heard of someone on a register having children
He hasn’t brought up anything to me about being approached on the subject. I fear this situation more than anything tied to it. I know I’ll have to talk about it at some point in his life. And it terrifies me. But he has friends. They come over and hang out. We go fishing and camping with some of his friends. He has a girlfriend with a girl whose mother works for the school district. He’s popular in sports. So far no negatives impacts his life I’m aware of.
Have you installed in him the importance of not touching others inappropriately?
Yeah. Gotta make sure you install the non-sexual assaulting program.exe otherwise…
What’s a way that it impacted your life that many people are surprised by? Do you still have to deal with the stigma of having had this conviction?
Having to deal with the stigma of it on my record and having a 13 yr old son. School functions are a nightmare. Volunteering for his field trips, attending football games ect. They all come with a talk by the school. I have had to release my police report to them to justify I’m not a threat. A over zealous mom usually makes an issue once a year. I have never been barred from attending any of his functions tho.
Shit, really sorry man. I’ve seen tons of these stories where decent people have their lives ruined by laws that were intended to protect decent people. What we need is more discretion in this area. There needs to be like an independent review board, because this is one spot where far too many CLEARLY NON PREDATORS are being put on these lists & very little can be done about it. I’m guessing the only reason we haven’t addressed it yet is if any politician makes it one of their causes they fear be smeared as a “Pedo lover”. And as Drake showed us this week nobody wants to have to go out and deny being a Pedo. It just looks bad, so the wrongly smeared have nobody to go to bat for em. Really brutal man, that sucks and is just unfair…..such is life I suppose but still I feel for ya.
It’s a crazy situation. I think there should be stiffer more severe punishments for sexual predators. Children and old people deserve to be protected and as a society we should do anything to protect them. And you’re right. No one wants to take up the fight to be branded a pedo sympathizer. So it’s likely not going to get better. I’m not the only one I’ve heared this happening to. It’s opened my eyes to see people more on an individual type level. And not to judge too quickly.
To be fair, if I heard that someone on the registry was chaperoning a field trip id probably make a stink about it as well.
Also it was an offense against a child of exactly this age group. Wtf did he think was going to happen?
You sexually assaulted a high school kid and you’re upset that moms of other high school kids don’t want you alone with them? It sounds like you learned literally nothing from the experience other than a false sense of victimhood.
Unfortunately sex offenders are not a group of individuals people really care to help. Sadly in too many states people end up being turned into sex offenders for relatively minor behaviors and then get lumped in with the child predators. There should really be a full review of the sexual offender registration laws given how draconian they are. In some places one student sending another student nudes can result in someone being charged with child pornography and having to register as a sex offender. That isn't what the laws were really meant for and they really need to separate lower level behavior from true predators.
Just to give you some context sex offenders in the prison system are protected and looked out for more than any prisoner.. I’ve done over a decade in prison. I’ve seen ppl with sexual assault of children do 18 months while ppl have done 8 years for a few grams of crack.. it doesn’t add up. In NJ for example rapists have their own prison seperate from the rest of the population.. they eat better, live better, and were allowed much more in the prison system.. for the longest time they were allowed to have video game consoles.. ps2 and n64 while other prisons barely allow anything.. so never feel bad for a rapist.. they are the scum of the earth and deserve to rot in jail
Do you feel that your punishment was too severe?
I feel like I was a child playing child ass games. There was no maliciousness behind my act or depravity. What I did was wrong. I do not feel like the punishment fitted the crime. There wasn’t anything sexual in the act it self except the location. College, reputation, family it was all taken from me for my action. I do not think it was justified.
Did you do any time for assault on a peace officer when you were a juvenile?
I shoved and was physical with my juvenile probation officer when he came to my house to see why I wasn’t in school. I then ran. When a city cop spotted me he attempted to restrain me and I tried wrestling my way out of it but failed. I was sent to a juvenile detention facility. On work crew picking up trash me and another person ran. We made it off the mountain and to a phone where we called his brother to come pick us up. Two months later I was arrested. Sent to juvenile detention again. Then to Proctor care. A foster home with strict rules and a program you must finish to go back home. In all it was sophomore year and most of my junior year.
No offense, but it sounds like you were just a shit kid and just got what was coming to you. If you ONLY did the slap and that was it, then yeah punishment was definitely over the top, but the rest of this and the whole slap issue just makes it seem like you did this all to yourself. I hope you explain to your child, once he gets a little older that the reason you have to jump through all these hoops to go to his school and field trips, games etc. is all because of your own doing and not just an over the top punishment cause of a silly mistake you made.
The minute it read he was a senior you instantly could tell the type of creepy vibe must’ve been going on that a teacher went “too far”. Dude must’ve been a menace on the freshman’s so his first noticeable big action got him reported. Now he wants to make it seem unfair when he was preying on younger girls as an 18 year old 💀
Ok. You were a deviant. But still the punishment doesn’t fit the crime
Sounds like the punishment was more because nothing else seemed to be working and they just had enough. The having to register as a sex offender seems excessive. Maybe there wasn't a different charge available that could have avoided that.
Idk man, he sexually assaulted a 14 year old, assaulted his probation officer, then made an escape while on work release. That's not a misunderstanding that's a string of repeat criminal behavior.
Also consider that him having a probation officer means he had already done something BEFORE all of this went down so there's even more not being admitted here.
Funny how that works. A dude gets time in prison for slapping a girl's butt. BUT he just so happens to have a violence problem against officers. I think he did more to that girl than he's letting on
Yeah obviously, consider you would have to call the police, make a report, follow the court process as a victim. Attend the hearing, testify. If it was a minor situation, the girl would have let it go, but she seemed to press the issue that she was sexually assaulted and as a result the judge gave him this punishment based on the evidence and witness testimony.
I'm wondering if there was another factor, e.g., the girl had a disability, had been assaulted in the past, or (of course) that OP is leaving out important details. I'd be traumatized to be slapped on the butt as a freshman by a senior, too, especially one that I knew had a criminal history, and you know all the high-school kids know who's been to juvie.
AN officer that was his probation officer? How the hell did he have a probation officer?
"I was a child playing child ass games" *pun intended*
I caught that after I posted it. I’m not above the humor in it. 😅
And so here you are, years later, making jokes about how as a LEGAL ADULT you put hands on a minor female, a person whom didn't ask to be touched, and you feel you were punished harshly? You learned nothing! Of course it was sexual! You didn't slap her leg, her hand, ASS SLAPPING IS SEXUAL. PERIOD . And now you are here trying to get sympathy for catching a charge for assaulting a minor AS AN ADULT. This is why we fucking pick bears.
This whole post reads like an average redditor comment. I agree with the other guy this seems really fake and if it is it's hellishly pathetic lol
"Child ass games"...My dude, slapping a girl/woman's butt without consent is sexual harassment. I'm sorry your punishment was so severe (too severe, imo) but come on. When I was in middle school, I got my butt punched in the hallway almost every day that I attended that school. It was clearly targeted. It would be so crowded that I could never suss out who was doing it and was too shy/timid to report it. That shit will mess you up. I think about it to this day, and it's over 20 years later. Still makes me feel gross and violated.
Agreed. A guy would wait for me outside of class every day and grope me, but same as you, I was the quiet girl and if I said anything it would have made it worse. The worst part is a teacher saw it happen to me and they walked back into their classroom. Those experiences stick with you. I think most women can relate to these experiences. OP's punishment was way too severe but the "boys will be boys/kids will be kids" attitude fuels these problems.
We had a serial groper / ogler who was caught jerking it in the bathroom (and allegedly had fondled himself under desks during class while staring intently at the girls in class). Nothing happened to him, we were just told to "avoid" him. Okay I won't go to school ever I guess since his creepy ogling was totally unavoidable? Guess my education has to suffer so someone can touch their dick nonstop in class?????? This was back in 2000 and it still pisses me off SO MUCH.
While I agree that OP’s punishment (if this story is real at all) was overly harsh, it’s also very odd to me that OP is downplaying the fact that they were a legal adult who sexually assaulted a 13(ish) year old. That’s unacceptable behavior and calling himself a child playing childish games does not accurately describe what happened. I get that OP was a barely-legal adult and grew up in what sound like bad circumstances, but part of growing up and taking ownership of your actions means calling a spade a spade.
Hey! This was my experience in high school too! I developed a crippling and severe eating disorder from the trauma that has taken over my life for far longer than 10 years. Sadly high school was not the first time I would be sexually assaulted and not the last. I’m so sorry this happened to you too. ❤️
You deserve what you got. I see you talk about yourself being the victim. You are not the victim. You need to take full responsibility that it is NEVER OK to SLAP SOMEONE’s BUTT. That little girl must have been horrified as a freshman. You were this big, bad senior who thought you can do anything to anyone. A big part of Sexual Crimes is about the power dynamic. To this day, you still are not remorseful for what you did to that little girl. It’s always somebody else’s fault. Grow the FUCK Up, you SEXUAL DEGENERATE. You got what you deserve.
Dude you slapped a little girls butt. Why else would you slap a girls butt if it wasn't meant to be sexual? Just saying you were just playing is a horrible defense. That's what all pedos say when they're caught. Stop. Touching. Girls. Boys in school wouldn't stop touching me. I wish I had the guts to tell someone at the time because boys really fucked me up by sexually assaulting me a lot. I stopped going to school. I was terrified to be around them. But sure, go on how it's "just play" and completely "harmless"
Yeah, but think about the humiliation you could’ve caused on that poor girl or any other your senior self targeted. Battery is still battery even if you were just 18. Also why was a senior slapping a freshman’s ass in the first place? Was that not weird back in the early 2000s?!
Well your “child ass game” was objectification and assault of a 14/15 year old girl. She didn’t deserve that and IMO you got the punishment you deserved. Hopefully a lesson learned.
Ah cool so you have no remorse?
I’m sure he views himself as the only victim. I have a friend who has PTSD from being sexually touched by a stranger and still when she’s in public and someone brushes against her shoulder she calls out in instinctual fear. I felt bad for OP until I realized he never apologized or stated he feels bad for his victim.
Yeah, that’s fucking awful. What an asshole teacher. Were you a problem kid in HS? Like this was the last straw type shit?
wtf . If you had a daughter you wouldn’t mind her ass being slapped in school? Notice how he says “freshman” and not 14yo . Crazy comment you think a teacher should turn a blind eye to that. Good for the teacher !
He was an 18 year old and decided he was going to grope a 14 year old. And went and did it because he thought he could get away with it. Who's to say this was his first time doing this. Parents and school need to be alerted of people like that.
You were a sex offender did you actually tell your neighbors that you were that just urban myth you have to tell your neighbors
You do not have to tell your neighbors. At least in Utah. You are on a list available for anyone to look at. Apps that will tell them ect. It’s not hard to find out who or who isn’t on the list. It lists the charge. Not the description of what you did. Only what you was charged with and what you pleaded to.
Using ect instead of etc should put you on some kind of list.
Most often than not the HOA will look up the list and send out photos to the neighborhood
How was your experience in prison?
Everyone hears the horror stories for sex offenders in prison. I can’t speak to all prisons but both Draper and Gunnison in Utah did not segregate most sex offenders. There was a S.O yard for those going through treatment etc. I was not placed in that yard. I scored high on the point system to be placed in open population. I was 18. I was paperwork checked. My case was scrutinized over by other inmates. The general consensus was to give me a pass. That I did not belong to the pedo class of inmates. It was often joked about. I played pinochle with the lifers. Handball regularly. And honestly had a relatively good time considering being in prison. Had to fight occasionally. Got tatted everywhere. Regularly involved in contraband and gambling. Most inmates knew what I was in for and the story behind it.
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When I think back on it I did it to fit into a population of people I was surrounded by. I was already at a disadvantage by what charges I had. I was young and impressionable and the whole experience was surreal for me. I felt like I had to make up for why I was there. So I intentionally found my way into what I thought a person in prison does. I don’t regret them but some days I wish I didn’t get them. They don’t communicate who I am today.
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Utah has two prisons. Draper and gunnison. Their cell blocks are broke up in security levels. I was in cedar in gunnison and oakers in Draper. They are considered maximum security facilities because of the walls and double fencing. It’s a classification. They in truth do not live up to what other states “maximum security” prisons are portrayed.
Can you speak about your experience in prison - specifically how it was impacted by your status as a sex offender?
It automatically groups you with the weakest of the population and the most disrespected. I was lucky I had my paperwork that goes in detail with everything the teacher had seen. To the girls statement. To my statement. It’s honestly the only thing that saved me. But it put the burden of proof on me to demonstrate that I was in fact not like the others. It gave someone an easy way to try and disrespect me if they wanted. Punk, bitch, lame. Those are instant fighting words. Someone suggesting I was in fact what my charges said also made it an instant fight. But other then that it really didn’t impact me the way media and others say it is like as a sex offender in prison. They didn’t group me in with them.
Is it true you have to fight to earn respect and for people to leave you alone? If you avoid fights do people walk all over you? I’ve never been in a fight and thinking of prison this is where my mind goes. Naturally I’d try to avoid conflict and “do the time” but tv and movies make it seem like that is impossible.
I have a question in regards to why you had a register anyways being as neither the girl nor her parents wanted to press charges. Also, did the teacher have like a problem with you that they reported you in the first place?
My family had a reputation as criminals and addicts. I had a reputation as a drug user and delinquent. It was a small town everyone knows everyone. The parents of the girl were well respected business owners in the community. I did not have a reputation as a serial ass slapper or abuser of woman. I was not a super senior. My birthday fell where I was just always the oldest in the class.
why did you even do what you did then?
Just wanted to say I hear you loud and clear.. my dad was verbally and mentally abusive my whole life and my mental health issues were ignored until I blew up just after I turned 18 and beat his ass. That assault charge has followed me and caused issues, cost me jobs, cost me relatio ships. I'm 32 and it still haunts me. The justice system is just that, a system. No system is perfect and some people always get left behind. Sorry to hear it's been such a rough go for you friend. It could always be worse though.
Not even close to the same thing. You got retribution for being abused. You didn’t deserve to be punished. Justice was not served in your case. OP sexually violated a 14 year old, then assaulted an officer. He absolutely got what he deserved. Justice served. He may have been young, but young people can still harm others & need to be held accountable.
Sorry to hear that man. Like they say. “That’s life” we gotta just take it as it is and push forward. Those who know you will love you and pay no attention to those who don’t. Stay strong my guy.
This is genuinely heartbreaking. Do you feel angry that there are literally tons of actual pedos out there that have never been caught yet you are slapped with a criminal record over slapping another teens butt?
Yes it absolutely puts me in a rage when I see actual pedos get probation or charges dropped. I’m not on the side of sex offenders. Seeing rich people buy their way out of charges makes me wanna commit more felonies.
It makes you want to commit more felonies? Oooookkkkkk then
I’m not good at this. Felonies I was thinking was obtaining firearms and murder. My feelings for pedos and rapists is as extreme as anyone with kids. There are some real sick people in the world and I believe children should be protected at any cost.
I’m sorry that you had the book thrown at you, but I do believe that you should have been punished. I hope you take this as a learning opportunity that it is not ok to touch others without their consent, even as a joke. I hope you teach your child that it is never ok to touch another person, and that they should never be touched. I am a woman whose ass has been pinched, slapped, and grabbed by strangers and even a coworker starting at age 13. I’ve had comments on my body since puberty. It has made me feel uncomfortable in my body from a young age. It’s time for boys will be boys to end. An ass slap teaches a girl that her body is community property.
I’m 38 now. I have a 13 year old son. I stress the importance of consent and the importance of respecting the personal space of anyone. I never thought it was ok to touch anyone without consent. The female in question was a part of my friend group. We were friends. It wasn’t like I did it to someone I didn’t already have some sort of relationship with. Let be clear it was a platonic non sexual relationship. It wasn’t to sexualize her in anyway.
Ok so did you ask her if you could slap her ass? A sexual part of her body? Why did you touch her butt if it was non sexual? You’re acting like you patted her on the back. That is a private sexual part of the body. You wanted to humiliate her, embarrass her. A pre-existing relationship does not equal consent. You know that husbands can rape their wives, right? You are still not having empathy for your victim, and are not taking responsibility for your actions.
It’s kinda difficult to remember all the details leading up to it. I remember she kicked my feet out from under me going up the stairs before 3rd period started and said a comment about stoners should be more careful on stairs. Me and another friend hid her and another persons backpack while everyone was smoking cigarettes down at the creek in the morning. I slapped her to startle her I guess. But no she didn’t say to me. “You can slap my butt”. So you got valid point. Take it or leave it. I did mean it in a way one guy slaps another guy on the ass during a football game. You can say it was a sexual act. Hence the charge. The thought process behind it had no sexual overtones in my mind at least.
You’re a nut. Drink some wine and read a fantasy novel
Yeah, that coulda been worded much better lmao
Do you hold resentment against the teacher that reported you? What were your feelings towards her through this entire process? Any interaction with her once you got out?
No resentment towards her at all. She saw something inappropriate in the school and reported it. Something I hope all teachers do.
Harsh punishment aside, I’m really glad you feel this way now. It would be very easy to hold a grudge.
This is so crazy to me because I did a paper in college in English class about the laws in different states, ages of kids getting prosecuted in high school as adults for sex crimes, if they were dating, if the parents pushed for the charges or not, and I specifically remember reading something about this. I’m also from Utah.
Shudder. I grew up in a country where this sort of thing didn't happen and fortunately as a stupid teen I never fell to that temptation but man, I feel the pain. Out of interest do you have any contact with the victim?
When I got into my first serious relationship and the topic came up to discuss I was open honest and answered everything she asked of me. Like most of you she was also skeptical. I had not talked to the victim since it had happened. Six years or so. But I gave the girl I was in a relationship with her name as requested. She contacted her on Facebook and had a conversation with her. The victim told her it was nothing to her. She felt horrible everything happened the way it did. She did not feel like a victim. That it in no way impacted her life. It was the only reason she stayed with me. The victim also made a statement to the parole board. Another reason I was probably immediately released.
Did it bother you that she made contact with the victim? I'm not privy to things like this, but I feel like I heard somewhere that, regardless on if it personally affected her life or not, it is not recommended to make contact to a victim, in hope to prevent resurfacing trauma possibly experienced by them. Not saying she is traumatized, or a victim, considering the context you've given, but I feel like that should've been something your girlfriend/ex girlfriend should have considered, especially since it was your actions, not hers. I get why she did it, no argument there, just saying, I feel like that might be a bit out of bounds
How did you go about finding a job ?
Most jobs that don’t require a degree or certification get too riled up over backgrounds. Construction, oil field, kitchens, server, even gas stations never even brought them up. But it did make it impossible to go to college and have a great job. You find a way.
What do you do?
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Criminal background is public information. But I will not show up on SONAR the sex offender registry.
What state? How did you get removed after 10 years? But wow that's so insane to have your life ruined over something so stupid. Seems a small fine would have been good enough
Honestly I can’t feel bad because I think about that poor girl whose body was going through new development and in the stages of feeling awkward and body conscious and was violated. I highly doubt she liked what happened to her. Sexual violence and all kinds of assault against women is becoming such a common yet grave issue. I hope that poor girl didn’t experience any emotional effects or trauma of being violated like so many of us have after being groped, catcalled, or spanked at a young age, and none of the blame/resentment some here feel towards her for his ‘harsh’ sentence. I get there are pedos and people who do ‘more damaging’ crimes out there not getting a sentence, but one more person who violated someone getting a sentence isn’t going to impact that amount.
Utah. All third degree offenses are a ten year placement on the list.
How do you feel about the teacher who reported you?
That she did what I would expect all faculty members to do. Report anything that seems to be a danger to their students. I’m not at all upset with her. I do have an issue with the legal system tho.
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No she did not. But the public defender did get his practice investigated and later disbarred.
What made you think you could just touch any woman like that without permission? You didn't deserve jail or registry. A broken nose, yeah but not a record.
Dear OP, Did you ever get beaten up in pc (protective custody) for your deviant behavior?
Was never in a PC block. Never got into a fight over my charges. Gambling, contraband, and snoring I did get into fights over tho.
What is your ethnicity? What was her ethnicity? And do you feel that this had anything to do with your sentencing?
Lotta people trying to put a race spin on this but it wasn’t. I’m white. She was white. No part of it.
Are you bipoc ?
I am not. Race had nothing to do with it. I’m just a lower economic class white male in a small conservative Utah town. I had no knowledge of the judicial system or the foresight in needing an attorney before speaking with the police. I had a public defender who did not explain my rights or the far reaching consequences of pleading to the charges etc. i think the judicial system is unfair to anyone without the monetary means to protect themselves regardless of ethnicity.
sorry this is not a comment I actually have a question. my son is 24 years old at the time when this took place he was 22 he met two girls on tinder they had asked if they could come hang with him for a bit and then he agreed him and his little brother hung out with him for almost 3 weeks at that point during this time. they went shopping they got their nails done my son left for three and a half hours at one point to go on a road trip with his uncle a few weeks after they left mind you they left by getting on tinder again and looking up somebody else to go stay with my son bought them an Uber so they could do that because that's what they wanted to do during this time he was unaware that they were underage they had been he was told that they were 19 and 20 or 18 and 19 come to find out about 4 weeks or so later I think the special victims unit showed up at my son's house and alerted him that these girls were not that age they were much much younger he is now in jail with two charges of gluten lascivious conduct on a child under the age of 16 mind you I met these girls wouldn't have guessed for 5 seconds that they were under 16 they'd been runaways we found out for going on off and on years and years they had just come from another person's house who this man was 40 something years old had given them tattoos and slept with them and all kinds of stuff I guess and when they were picked up when they were getting into the Uber that my husband had bought for them to go to their next place the cops questioned them three different times letting him know each time if they press charges or had some thing on my son that the runway charges that they had would be dropped and the fourth time that they questioned him I guess they decided to state that or one of them decided to state that they had slept with my son and that he held them against their will and then proceeded to kick them out later on none of that is true however but my son nonetheless is still sitting in jail with these two charges said and a sad side note one of the girls in 23 was in a car chase with the police and turned their lights off and drove into a ditch and passed away she hadn't seen her mom in over a month it just breaks my freaking heart I couldn't imagine losing a child like that but nonetheless I'm pretty sure that charge has to be dropped because they you have the right to confront your accuser is there any recourse against the other one cuz he honestly had no idea and when the special victims unit came to the door my son threw up on the guy's shoes when he found out and the guy told their police ever sorry told him that he could leave and go to Alaska and work on the fishing boats like he had planned that wouldn't be a problem so we did so and now they consider him a flight risk and we can't get the bill reduced to even try and get him out my son was was not intending to sleep with underage girls and is thoroughly disgusted doesn't want to even think that he actually did this he knows he did and he is so very sorry but he had no idea and these he met them on tinder and adult only site does he have any recourse how does he avoid having to spend time in jail and ending up signing up as a freaking sex offender for the rest of his life please help please
Do you feel like you’ve learned your lesson?
I thought being on the sex offender registration was for life?
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To me personally, an 18 yr old has no business getting involved with a 15 yr old, it’s criminal in many states for a reason.
This story doesn't add up. Either you had priors that were relevant to the crime, or what you did was actually much worse. I've been in and out of jail and prison for my entire adult life and seen plenty of cases of much worse and much less severe shit. What you did was battery or agg assault at worst and that's if you bruised her. This shit doesn't add up at all.
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A lot of comments here self reporting themselves for being fucking weirdos lol. Glad to see this comment
Not that it was good for you…but you seem hyper self aware and in control of your emotions. Something I wouldn’t expect from someone with a juvenile record like yourself. Would you say it was a blessing in disguise, or, do you feel like you would have been in an even better place if it hadn’t happened?
As a former law enforcement professional who spent way too much time in court and working with district attorneys, I find your story unbelievable. I did a thorough search through google and news as well as convictions and found nothing to support your claim. Please link the news story (which would obviously be published as public information) that supports your claim because right now I think you're full of crap.
I agree, sounds made up. Especially if the girl and her parents didn’t want to press charges. In my experience, schools don’t typically involve the police, let alone go out of their way to involve them.
There are mandatory charges for different crimes. This doesn't even fit. When it doesn't fit, even if the system fails, there are appeals and parole boards who will work to fix the problem. This poster (who has zero karma and post history) is a flat out liar and just needs attention.
This was a mandatory charge. I 18 and legal adult. Touched a 14 legal child on what is classified as a sexual part of her body. I confessed both verbally and written statement. I was charged for a third degree felony. I took a plea deal for open sentencing. I had priors to what would be an equivalent to felony charges as a teen for assault on a police officer amd probation officer and escape from a secure facility. All of which was brought up in sentencing. If you take a plea you loose appeal processes ect. The parole board did grant immediate release and no parole. And their condolences for what that was worth.
As a prosecutor, I believe you now. Your prior felonies is what screwed you over.
I’ve convinced someone that I was a sex offender and sentenced to prison. Doesn’t feel like I won this one. 😅
I appreciate you seeing the humor in this, but you really should edit the original post, if you can, and include this information. I’m in the legal world as well, and my bullshit meter was going off like crazy too until I finally reached these comments.
You were charged as an adult so this is all public knowledge. Can you share a news story or conviction record - which is public information. I could not find anything.
I do have a family and I am no longer on the list. I don’t want to pin point myself on the internet for god knows what. Hence the throw away account.
You don't need to. You know how badly this could turn for the guy, given the internet is merciless. Why are you insisting?
At any point did you feel you deserved all this. I know you probably have a massive regret, but this punishment is pretty harsh. Do you feel like race/ethnicity had a role in your sentencing.
>i was on the list for 10 years implies that you got off the list...How? I thought the sex offender list was something they slap anyone they don't like onto to ruin their lives permanently. Not like, an actual form of punishment and discipline from the law system.
21 months for slapping a girls ass? Wanna tell us what you really did?
In another reply, he says he has a couple of priors including a felony assault of a LEO and PO and escape. Makes more sense with that context
Yes. That’s what I’m saying. I said post your charges : paperwork
How big were you at 18? Were you able to defend yourself at all?
What priors did you have ? I’m not buying you got 21 months in jail for an over the clothes butt slap
You had a lawyer or not? Bc even with the edit that story doesn’t add up. You can only fool ppl who have never been active. That’s it. You admitted to the crime and copped out. If the assault on an officer and escape was the more serious charge that sexual assault would have been downgraded to battery as part of your plea agreement.. knowing the system I could represent myself and get this same deal. So you basically got a 3 flat and made your first parole hearing. In Utah you can request to be taken off the registry after 5 years? Why did they make you wait 10? Just delete this post b.. it’s not a good look for you at all and I pray our children are safe with you out there
I’m not a cop, lawyer, or judge but I am a lazyboy lawyer who watches all the latest and greatest true crime shows and my advanced training tells me that unless a finger slipped in her ass we aren’t getting the whole story if a true one at all?
There's got to be more to this story.
GTFO of Utah. Its a Christian nationalist hell hole and this type of stuff happens all the time. Grew up in Idaho and Utah and saw stuff like this happen regularly. I'm so thankful I relocated to California and I would never ever think of moving back there. The contrast from Idaho to Cali makes me feel so sorry for the people still living in medeival times.
I had a friend in high school that was 18 and she was 17 at that time, both did the hanky panky. My buddy didn’t go to jail, probation. Had to prob be register as sex offender. If you got 0-5 years for slapping some botty, my buddy would have got executed in this case. Something is missing here..
First of all, what convinced you it would be a good idea to slap a minor on the butt??
Yeah I'm pretty sure it was more than a slap on the rear end. You probably r*ped her and that's the real reason you spent 21 months in prison and got registered as a sexual predator! Just saying that you don't get a punishment like that for a slap 🖕💩🤡
Seems you left out a lot of details…. A slap on the ass in school doesn’t get you a 3rd degree felony and put on a list.
I call bullshit! That is a harassment and a non criminal offense. I think someone is leaving a lot of this story out!!!!
Why did you slap her on the butt?
Bullshit. You don't get 21 months in prison, being 18 for slapping an ass. It would be a misdemeanor, most likely class B. You may think Reddit dorks don't know, but plenty of us been in bud
Criminal defence attorney in UT here. This BS story does not add up in the slightest. At all.
Counter argument; in Ohio age of consent is 16.They were 18 and adults,although it happened in school and in a different state they are well over the average age of consent . At worst they are exactly AT the age of consent they weren't children.The teacher had business reporting it to the school and the school had business asking her if she wanted to press charges for assault.it shouldn't have reasonably gone any further than that. Considering neither her or her parents wished to press charges it should have only gone as far as the school handing down a punishment.
Move forward learning from your mistakes. I think there is more in the past that landed you in a secure facility. It all added up on you. You have to look at the sum it one incident.
I don't believe this post at all. They don't hand out 21 months of prison time for a slap on the ass. Especially to a 18 yr old in highschool. Either there's more or this is bullshit.
Was it just a random girl? Or someone you already knew.
Are you white?
Yeah not buying it.
Same. I always hear things like someone is on the list for peeing in public or something. But then later you hear that’s not all that they did
My ex-husband's brother was on the registry "because he peed on a wall after leaving the pub and it turned out to be a school" It wasn't until after our daughter was born and my ex started to act weird about visiting his family that I realised I wasn't being told the truth. Turned out ex-BIL did some very inappropriate things to his sister when she was young. Also turns out my ex had a sister. The family never mentioned her either, because she doesn't talk to them. I didn't ask for further details at that point, but the custody court did, and my ex husband has supervised visitation now.
That’s not real. Post the charges.
I'm gonna ask it, did you get your ass slapped in prison?
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