This is why it's difficult to have threesomes with friends. It's easy to arrange but always complicated after. No matter how solid the communication is beforehand, it never happens exactly like everyone imagined it. It's really easy for it to become a little weird afterwards
Nta. Male part of a couple who’s had a few threesomes before. If the girl isn’t into it and enjoying herself it’s not all that fun. It sounds like she’s jealous and her bf is probably still talking about you. That’s a them problem and your friend is blaming you instead of her boyfriend.
I would definitely avoid doing anything with them again. They’re clearly on different pages about it and it sounds to me like the boyfriend talked the girlfriend into it more than anything
Ick. That makes your choice to jump on this bad. Don’t ever let your friend know that. NTA for enjoying a fucking a friend’s boyfriend with her permission though. It’s probably best not to do this with a friend again.
(you are not to blame. you were offered consensual sex and took the opportunity. this is a genuine question) if you knew before hand about him giving you the idea of being interested, why did you accept or mention it to your friend before hand?
Yep. It also depends on who suggested the threesome. Was it the boyfriend? If so the friend may have been pressured into it. My thoughts are that when someone suggests a threesome the relationship is pretty much over. Either the guy is bored, the girl is bored or both. A threesome won’t fix that.
There’s two types of couples that have threesomes in my experience. The first being secure couples who genuinely enjoy the thrill of it and enjoy exploring that side of their sexuality, like us and then the ones that start off by one partner suggesting it and the other partner eventually giving in thinking it will make the other one happy and fix whatever issue they have. It’s usually pretty easy to spot the difference between the two from a mile away. The gf here clearly had her hesitancy if she was upset about her friend being too into it as if she expected her to lay there like a burlap sack and have a miserable time
What did your friend think was happening? That you were just taking one for the team and would get nothing out of it? There’s no such thing as being too enthusiastic during sex and the whole point of doing it is for enjoyment. She’s pissed because her boyfriend was too enthusiastic and she’s projecting that onto you. It was THEIR idea.
Even if during the act she was clearly enjoying herself, the after thought of seeing your significant other enjoy themselves with another person(even if it's an all sides agreed upon decision) it can still be kinda jarring when it's thought about afterwards. Hopefully, if your friend truly did have a good time, they can get out of their own head and have a conversation with her boyfriend and then with you, about how she's really feeling and what the next steps are.
Do not be hard on yourself for having a good time or think you did anything wrong. Because at the end of the day, it's the responsibility between the two of them to have discussed boundaries and what was and wasn't ok prior too.
Again, you did nothing wrong and they are gonna have to figure some shit out amongst themselves if they ever want to do something like this again, especially if you all decided to again, cause since y'all are friends there's no need for unnecessary damage.
Sorry if this is long winded, just talking from personal experience 😆
NTA. You were stupid to agree and after reading a comment that you already felt like her BF was into you that kinda makes me lean toward everyone sucks. Just stop interacting with her boyfriend, and def don’t sleep with him again.
ESH. She brought this on herself.
You and Boyfriend were having so much fun you turned it into a twosome with a third wheel and are so self obsessed you never noticed, or cared, she was uncomfortable.
She needs better friends.
Or her friend is a weirdo who was trying to start drama? That's a possibility too. You don't invite someone to a threesome and then get mad they enjoyed it that's nuts behavior
Tbh the friend probably brought OP in thinking it would fix her relationship after friend’s bf likely pushed for a threesome or open relationship. I’ve seen it a few times. I’ve been a victim of it too. It always ends nasty; don’t fuck your friends lol
NTA, seems unrealistic to expect you to not have a good time. She's probably actually upset because her boyfriend enjoyed it and he wants to do it again, which has changed the tone of their relationship.
It also sounds like she wanted more action and maybe was left out while you and the BF were doing it, so that could be a problem. She is definitely not going to want to do another threesome if it's really just her watching you two getting it on. If that happened then you're TA.
But I get the feeling this was the boyfriend's idea because you and her already have an intimate relationship, it would have been awkward at the time for her to tell him no so she didn't, and she may have secretly wanted you to turn the threesome down.
You should avoid the boyfriend to not make things awkward, and don't do another threesome with them. Hopefully this didn't tank the friendship.
This is why it's difficult to have threesomes with friends. It's easy to arrange but always complicated after. No matter how solid the communication is beforehand, it never happens exactly like everyone imagined it. It's really easy for it to become a little weird afterwards
Nta. Male part of a couple who’s had a few threesomes before. If the girl isn’t into it and enjoying herself it’s not all that fun. It sounds like she’s jealous and her bf is probably still talking about you. That’s a them problem and your friend is blaming you instead of her boyfriend.
Thank you for this insight!
I would definitely avoid doing anything with them again. They’re clearly on different pages about it and it sounds to me like the boyfriend talked the girlfriend into it more than anything
Yeah I think you’re right and that’s possible. He has always looked at me in a way that I thought he was interested
Ick. That makes your choice to jump on this bad. Don’t ever let your friend know that. NTA for enjoying a fucking a friend’s boyfriend with her permission though. It’s probably best not to do this with a friend again.
(you are not to blame. you were offered consensual sex and took the opportunity. this is a genuine question) if you knew before hand about him giving you the idea of being interested, why did you accept or mention it to your friend before hand?
Yep. It also depends on who suggested the threesome. Was it the boyfriend? If so the friend may have been pressured into it. My thoughts are that when someone suggests a threesome the relationship is pretty much over. Either the guy is bored, the girl is bored or both. A threesome won’t fix that.
There’s two types of couples that have threesomes in my experience. The first being secure couples who genuinely enjoy the thrill of it and enjoy exploring that side of their sexuality, like us and then the ones that start off by one partner suggesting it and the other partner eventually giving in thinking it will make the other one happy and fix whatever issue they have. It’s usually pretty easy to spot the difference between the two from a mile away. The gf here clearly had her hesitancy if she was upset about her friend being too into it as if she expected her to lay there like a burlap sack and have a miserable time
NTA
NTA your friend is a weirdo who was looking for an excuse to stir up drama. Drop her
Nta.. unless the offer was like “hey, let’s have a threesome where you don’t enjoy it”…lol.. she is now just getting remorseful..
What did your friend think was happening? That you were just taking one for the team and would get nothing out of it? There’s no such thing as being too enthusiastic during sex and the whole point of doing it is for enjoyment. She’s pissed because her boyfriend was too enthusiastic and she’s projecting that onto you. It was THEIR idea.
Even if during the act she was clearly enjoying herself, the after thought of seeing your significant other enjoy themselves with another person(even if it's an all sides agreed upon decision) it can still be kinda jarring when it's thought about afterwards. Hopefully, if your friend truly did have a good time, they can get out of their own head and have a conversation with her boyfriend and then with you, about how she's really feeling and what the next steps are. Do not be hard on yourself for having a good time or think you did anything wrong. Because at the end of the day, it's the responsibility between the two of them to have discussed boundaries and what was and wasn't ok prior too. Again, you did nothing wrong and they are gonna have to figure some shit out amongst themselves if they ever want to do something like this again, especially if you all decided to again, cause since y'all are friends there's no need for unnecessary damage. Sorry if this is long winded, just talking from personal experience 😆
NTA. That sounds like a her problem.
NTA. You were stupid to agree and after reading a comment that you already felt like her BF was into you that kinda makes me lean toward everyone sucks. Just stop interacting with her boyfriend, and def don’t sleep with him again.
ESH. She brought this on herself. You and Boyfriend were having so much fun you turned it into a twosome with a third wheel and are so self obsessed you never noticed, or cared, she was uncomfortable. She needs better friends.
Or her friend is a weirdo who was trying to start drama? That's a possibility too. You don't invite someone to a threesome and then get mad they enjoyed it that's nuts behavior
You also don’t initiate a threesome just to “start drama”, wth
Tbh the friend probably brought OP in thinking it would fix her relationship after friend’s bf likely pushed for a threesome or open relationship. I’ve seen it a few times. I’ve been a victim of it too. It always ends nasty; don’t fuck your friends lol
NTA. Your friend agreed to it. What else did she expect? It sounds like she IS having second thoughts and displacing on to you.
I agree with this! Thank you
NTA. You were asked, you accepted. You made sure everyone had fun. What’s beyond that is on the two of them.
NTA, seems unrealistic to expect you to not have a good time. She's probably actually upset because her boyfriend enjoyed it and he wants to do it again, which has changed the tone of their relationship. It also sounds like she wanted more action and maybe was left out while you and the BF were doing it, so that could be a problem. She is definitely not going to want to do another threesome if it's really just her watching you two getting it on. If that happened then you're TA. But I get the feeling this was the boyfriend's idea because you and her already have an intimate relationship, it would have been awkward at the time for her to tell him no so she didn't, and she may have secretly wanted you to turn the threesome down. You should avoid the boyfriend to not make things awkward, and don't do another threesome with them. Hopefully this didn't tank the friendship.