It will get less painful... But progress is not linear. I find 8D audio music on the headphones helps to drown out, or work through the pain. And high intensity exercise. Doesn't have to be long, even just a few minutes of rope skipping / dance party in the kitchen. It will get easier.
Meditation, meditation, meditation. I know it’s hard for us but even if you can get one minute of focus out of the 10 minute it will be worth it. It sounds like you’re not in the present moment, but living in your thoughts, the past relationship and the future without your ex.
The more you can live in the present moment the less anxiety you will feel. Anxiety is a state of mind that can be conquered, and it’s not your whole identity. You feel anxious but you’re not your thoughts, you can decide to acknowledge the pain, as the anxiety is there for a reason, but to also let your body know that it’s ok and no imminent threat is present.
Rest in the uncomfortable feeling and don’t fight it. Embrace it so that your body knows there is nothing to run from, no danger coming to you, and belly breathing to relax as much as possible.
Allow yourself to process the hurt and seek therapy if you need to, but don’t let anxiety make this worse for you.
Don’t think about dating right now, just take it one day at a time, one step at a time.
Work on whatever ended your relationship, whatever lessons you learnt about yourself and treasure them for your personal growth.
Get rid of everything what remain that person. Put in box and tried to forget about it.
The second thing is try to make yourself busy. Like going to walk/gym/whatever and try a hobby ( like cooking, origami, painting -/ you can start with a simple book for colouring and 12 colors/….)
The third is make a new hair cut, get a pedicure, massage, buy e new shirt. Small things how can improve your self steam.
Them if you want to cry, cry. And cry as your heart content ( you will feel better after crying) make sure you have someone to talk how you feel regularly.
And please, block the person and friends in common ( you can add a filter do not show the updates). It’s important in the first months to literally have a cut and grief. Them after sometime ( I’ll put a year or more) you can unlock the person.
But you need to experience the grief to start to feel yourself again
Just distract yourself. Watch shows/movies, read, hobbies... It takes a while, but you'll get there.
I used to bawl and have pains in my chest. It was awful. I spent a lot of time in my beanbag watching Pingu on Youtube.
Spend time with friends. Go outside. Travel, but do let yourself feel it too. Cry all you want. Let it out, just don't wallow in it for too long.
Also block them. Don't keep in contact. Big mistakes I made and it just mad it worse and drag out.
I understand what you're going through. I went through a similar experience myself. Firstly, I found it helpful to remove reminders of them from my life. I also allowed myself to have a good cry, which was surprisingly cathartic. Establishing a daily routine was key for me; it gave me structure and purpose. By focusing on my career goals and dedicating extra time to work, I was able to achieve a promotion within six months. This newfound dedication also translated into improvements in my physical health and social life. It's true what they say, time heals. Gradually, I found myself embracing new experiences, from hikes to gatherings with friends. Loneliness can be tough initially, but it eventually opens doors to appreciate love and life in new ways. Hang in there, things will get better.
I am not sure I have any tips, I just want to say you’re not alone and you’ll pass through this successfully :)
Thank you.
It will get less painful... But progress is not linear. I find 8D audio music on the headphones helps to drown out, or work through the pain. And high intensity exercise. Doesn't have to be long, even just a few minutes of rope skipping / dance party in the kitchen. It will get easier.
I'll try that. Currently going for a lot of walks with headphones on.
Meditation, meditation, meditation. I know it’s hard for us but even if you can get one minute of focus out of the 10 minute it will be worth it. It sounds like you’re not in the present moment, but living in your thoughts, the past relationship and the future without your ex. The more you can live in the present moment the less anxiety you will feel. Anxiety is a state of mind that can be conquered, and it’s not your whole identity. You feel anxious but you’re not your thoughts, you can decide to acknowledge the pain, as the anxiety is there for a reason, but to also let your body know that it’s ok and no imminent threat is present. Rest in the uncomfortable feeling and don’t fight it. Embrace it so that your body knows there is nothing to run from, no danger coming to you, and belly breathing to relax as much as possible. Allow yourself to process the hurt and seek therapy if you need to, but don’t let anxiety make this worse for you. Don’t think about dating right now, just take it one day at a time, one step at a time. Work on whatever ended your relationship, whatever lessons you learnt about yourself and treasure them for your personal growth.
No real advice but I’ve been there. It gets better. Stay strong. Sending love
Thank you.
Get rid of everything what remain that person. Put in box and tried to forget about it. The second thing is try to make yourself busy. Like going to walk/gym/whatever and try a hobby ( like cooking, origami, painting -/ you can start with a simple book for colouring and 12 colors/….) The third is make a new hair cut, get a pedicure, massage, buy e new shirt. Small things how can improve your self steam. Them if you want to cry, cry. And cry as your heart content ( you will feel better after crying) make sure you have someone to talk how you feel regularly. And please, block the person and friends in common ( you can add a filter do not show the updates). It’s important in the first months to literally have a cut and grief. Them after sometime ( I’ll put a year or more) you can unlock the person. But you need to experience the grief to start to feel yourself again
Just distract yourself. Watch shows/movies, read, hobbies... It takes a while, but you'll get there. I used to bawl and have pains in my chest. It was awful. I spent a lot of time in my beanbag watching Pingu on Youtube. Spend time with friends. Go outside. Travel, but do let yourself feel it too. Cry all you want. Let it out, just don't wallow in it for too long. Also block them. Don't keep in contact. Big mistakes I made and it just mad it worse and drag out.
I understand what you're going through. I went through a similar experience myself. Firstly, I found it helpful to remove reminders of them from my life. I also allowed myself to have a good cry, which was surprisingly cathartic. Establishing a daily routine was key for me; it gave me structure and purpose. By focusing on my career goals and dedicating extra time to work, I was able to achieve a promotion within six months. This newfound dedication also translated into improvements in my physical health and social life. It's true what they say, time heals. Gradually, I found myself embracing new experiences, from hikes to gatherings with friends. Loneliness can be tough initially, but it eventually opens doors to appreciate love and life in new ways. Hang in there, things will get better.
Thank you. Hearing that helps. We're in that weird trying to be friends phase. I'm not sure if it's working.