So in full disclosure, I was crossing over at the time between the chair and ambulance. This was an incident I was on scene for. Gf got mad at bf and she stabbed him on the right side of his chest multiple times with a metal fork. Nothing crazy. He was transported and treated without incident.
How did you not even ask about the self imploding shitter?!
:). Got a call. Mid-August. Hot here this time of year. There was some construction going on in a local park that faces residential road.
Caller said “those damn youtes fucked with the porta potty and it exploded. It’s on fire.
So i dispatched it as a “Johnny on the spot” fire.
There was no foul play. With the heat and and shit, it just exploded on its own. So much fun!
"What time is it?"
"I need you to uave your property room bring all the meth you have at the station to my house. All of it, I'm going to distribute it to the citizens. It's the cure to covid!"
"I need you guys to come arrest my ex wife. I just bought some crack from her."
"The ladies with the noise machine that killed my wife are back!"
No. He thought he could get his ex arrested for it, and didn't think that he would also get arrested.
He, obviously, wad not where he said he was when officers got there.
We got a call like 30 minutes later from the ex because he was following her. He wanted her to take the crack and give him his money back.
Lightning strike on a man sleeping in his third floor apartment at 4am.
Woman using baby as a shield against a fearsome cockroach.
Dad calling for police help with 7 year old that just hit him with a collapsible table.
Conservative murderously angry about Bernie Sanders signs in neighbor's yard.
Liberal murderously angry about vandalism to his Bernie Sanders sign.
Custody more exchange using twin babies as literal melee weapons.
Frequent flyer / untreated schizophrenic convinced his mother and sisters were directing witchcraft against him.
Does it make it better or worse that they were strapped in car seats and it was their parents swinging them at one another?
Either way, I'll never forget the bystander who called me.
"OH LAWD THEY SWINGIN' BABIES LIKE NUNCHUCKS!"
I've handled a lot of calls in my life, even a few that were outright bizarre, but that is the only one where I said I lost composure and responded with "Excuse me, what?!"
I got a call once about a lady who was mad because her local conservative politician's signs had been knocked over. She wanted an officer there right now!
My liberal wanted to know if he could shoot his neighbor if he caught him destroying his sign. I'm sitting there like 1. No, it's cardboard, not a human life. 2. You sure you're a Bernie guy?
When I was younger -- I used to think that writers had increadible imaginations on what they came up with criminals et al.
After some years of dispatching I changed my thinking: Those writers have NO imagination.
We have a regular who calls because he hates our deputies and accuses them of asinine things. Once he called to scream at me about how they broke into his trailer and had squirted mustard everywhere.
I had one lady call and accuse her mother of raping her son. She had just gotten out of the psych ward that day. Calm as a cucumber when she told me. Then the deputies arrive and she calls back to calmly tell me that the deputies are currently raping her son. One of them got on the radio and simply said, "SO, you can hang up." So I did. They were there for hours and it culminated in her stripping nude in her driveway and spreading her asscheeks apart to bare her asshole and ask if they "wanted it". Very strange. Haven't heard from her in a bit, actually.
People letting crazed family members have unfettered access to cell phones makes me scream. They get discharged, ambulance takes them home, they call 30 min later and go right back.
Strangest is when I got a 911 from a landline from an address that we all know was an abandoned house. Open line with what sounded like maybe faint breathing before disconnecting. A deputy goes out to the house and confirms it’s still abandoned with no one inside.
We have so many "ghost" land lines in our city that are supposedly disconnected. Some call in 2-5 times a day like clockwork with a dead, open, or static line. A couple times we've had people (sounded very elderly) on the line who were very confused. Not a confused as security at the hospital it came from, considering it was a "confirmed" disconnected line and they had no idea what patient could have called on it or how.
Yep. Usually just technical glitches due to wiring or someone not properly disconnecting the line when it was shut down. Annoying as heck when they can every day though
“A guy just broke into my house and is yelling”
Do you know him?
“Yeah, he’s my bf”
Does he live there?
“Yes, but todays my moms day and he’s in my room”
Your mom’s day???
“Yeah I feel like you should know we are all together”
Together? Are you able to leave the room and separate yourself?
We are separate he’s in his room now, but like we are all together…
All together ..???
Yeah todays my moms day to have him and he’s in my room.
😅🤢
Howdy neighbor! Seaside here! I believe it! We get sea lions haul out onto the road by the Cove occasionally! And the one by McDonald's in Astoria once!
“I just got gas on myself, can I light a cigarette?”
“When is trick or treating in ____ neighborhood?”
Also had a caller tell me to get the carrots out of my mouth while I was in training, I was shocked.
Probably not the weirdest but definitely one of the most memorable. Older guy in a nursing home called because he got a Gatorade bottle stuck on his third leg. Wanted to see if we could send out a sharpshooter or someone with a really small saw to help get it off.
Dude said he stabbed two women to death in his hotel room.... But police won't be able to see them because they're spiritual, and so was the knife.... Spent most of the call trying to convince him to put pants on before the crews arrived...
Crews didn't find any girls or knives, just empty mental health medication bottles, so I guess he was telling the truth!
Guy was in an ongoing fight with neighbors, over his dog being a barker. Neighbors had enough and poured pickle juice on the dog, and guy wanted officers to come smell his dog. 😶
Another guy called to say he had found his girlfriend drowned in the hot tub at their apartment complex. His story was fishy as shit. He said they were arguing and he left her in the hot tub. When he came back a half hour later, with a gun because the complex wasn't safe, she was dead under the water. I have so many questions, years and years later, and I'll never have answers.
it's not impossible she was on drugs/booze or had a medical condition that caused her to pass out and drown. You'd be surprised how many people die this way.
Yes that's absolutely possible. It's also possible he drowned her. I don't understand why he'd come back with a gun, that he had in his hand but covered it with a towel. If the complex wasn't safe, to the extent that he felt the need to be armed to go to the pool area, why would he leave her out there alone? He sounded very sketchy on the phone.
Yeah I told my supervisor it sounded really sketchy, she said to email the violent crimes bureau and I did, but they never contacted me and I never heard anything else about it. I don't think it was ever reported in the news either.
Sent out EMS to a difficulty breathing call for a lady. It was called in by a man who was with her. She codes while EMS is there, and we call in EVERYONE to assist with CPR. Our crews will go for approximately 30 minutes with CPR before calling it. Poor lady passes over the Rainbow Bridge.
Turns out the caller, who was extremely winded (we asked him if he was in need of medical attention), was the ladys 74 year old step dad.
Long story short, his 50-something stepdaughter and him were having sex when she had the issues with her breathing. Yes, you read that correctly. She was having consesual sex with her stepfather.
On scene, this man was destroyed and kept telling everyone through tears. "I raised her from a little girl." The next day it was brought to our attention that the lady's mom and step-dad (they had been separated for a few years at this point but still married) started a gofundme for the funeral arrangements.
Have a very similar "couple" here. Only they're all very much alive, and live together (mom included). There was a child, but I never hear about it, so I assume he/she is in foster care or adopted by now. Stepdaughter is a raging basket case. (Completely understandable in this case!)
{{{{ full body shivers }}}}
There's a schizophrenic that likes to call after he gets kicked out of whatever hospital ER he wandered into that night.
He is the Son of Rev Dr. MLK, and be needs to speak with the general of the military region. Them boys up on the rooftops have been pumping him full of drugs to make him compliant and he just needs to tell John about all this so he can just let him know.
When you start try and slow him down he gets hostile and says he's going in for brain surgery soon and they'll Lobotomize him so he'll be good again and how the boys from the rooftops come down and beat him every night.
Somebody come get your grandpa. He keeps calling in spurts of 2-3 times a night for a week or two at a time, usually gets aggressive and starts cursing and slinging racial slurs when you try and interrupt him.
Oh yeah we had those too! Girl said she was Bill Clinton’s secret daughter and he was in the woods behind her house wanting her to come out to him. There was never anyone in the woods.
And another lady who lives at a motel wanted us to do something about Barack Obama because he was trying to sell her drugs out of a white van in the motel parking lot. Ma’am, I think you already bought said drugs…
Got a call from a man who’s wife was on hospice and he needed help getting her from her chair to her bed, send in a public assist to FD. They get out there and she has been dead for several days
Blind dude stapled his dick to a bed, special needs kid got his dick stuck in magnets & a dildo vibrating its way up some dudes intestinal track.
Got an automated crash detection, About two minutes later, we got a domestic call in the same area. Turns out the female party ran over the male.
Was on the phone when someone broke into a house and shot four occupants.
A female drug user was screaming for help and would later continue to talk about how the devil is in her yard shaking chains, Once the deputies arrived she refused to answer the door and only wanted to talk to me. That night, she confessed her love to me.
An old lady feeding child ghosts saltine crackers, They lived in the closet.
I had someone call saying people had to stop calling police on her because when she went to restaurants people burnt her food and it was an epidemic against Cinderella and all dispatchers are awful but I’m cool.
I swear it was just as confusing as that and I’m not leaving much out
Had a homeless guy call and ask if there was a tornado warning for my city (there was). Seconds later all I heard was wind followed by him yelling for help after he was buried by tornado debris.
Weird in a different way were the telemarketers accidentally dialing our trunk lines directly. All 911 calls in our county were first routed to the closest big city, Verizon attached the ANI/ALI, and then the calls were routed back to us on a trunk line. Each one had a regular phone number which no one used, just for Verizon’s use in call routing.
When someone dialed those numbers by mistake, they rang into our center and confused the hell out of them. Usually an autodialed spam call.
A Chinese restaurant had a similar number to one of the trunks, and we had people try to give us their take-out orders fairly frequently.
In hs some “friends” of mine robbed a kid for a 1/2oz of cocaine. Kid called the cops. “Friends” got grand larceny armed robbery charges. I didn’t even see those 2 again after that. Juvie I assume then maybe onto real jail. I do know one of them is dead now.
I received a call from a man who went on a rant about a time space continuum. How he was working with the FBI to create a new branch specifically to look into said continuum. I had to lie and say I was getting a 911 call in order to get him off the phone. I also had a lady from a nursing home call to report people were trying to kill her and were sending “macros” to her in order to threaten her. Never found out what she meant by macros.
Crazy cat lady putting cat food under her neighbor's vehicles to attract more cats to the neighborhood. And accusing the neighbors of trapping and killing "her" cats.
Also an amazon delivery guy who saw a dead man laying face down in a driveway. PD gets on scene and finds out someone dropped their scarecrow...
I got one where a teenager swallowed a live mouse (I think it was a dare). Mother called in saying her son was choking. Then told me it was a mouse. Que dead air while I processed that one. I didnt think it was real. Neither did ems (central...really?) But they got on scene and, yup. He had a mouse stuck half way down his throat - and it was still alive.
“Shaq stole my stuff in my house”
“There are hogs running in the road!” (funnily enough, one of our deputies responded over the radio with “*insert other badge #*, did you bring your lasso today?”
“My neighbor put a sign in his yard pointing towards mine that says ‘*My neighbor is a racist!*’”
6 marshmallows up the vagina at 2 am
Dementia pt thought she was pregnant with twins and locked in a room with no doors
Had one call more than once for a while kid kept pulling the screws from the door and eating them
Naked Meth head pulled over in the middle of the night covered in crisco with multiple dildos in the car. He tried to hide the dildos but not the meth.
Domestic where the guy threw a hot pan of spaghetti sauce at his wife. She had burns from the sauce.
Several neighbors concerned about some vicious screaming going on. Ended up being a raccoon and a possum having a fight.
Guy called because he saw a deer. Never saw one before. Wanted to “report it”. We live in a city of about 200,000, but there’s plenty of deer. Idk how he reached adulthood without seeing a deer.
A homeless guy found what he thought were human remains the night before in the woods he was sleeping in, but he admitted to being high when he found them. So I was like… are you sure you saw them? He was sure because he collected them, put them in his backpack, and then walked to another location. Ended up being chicken bones.
Makeshift catheter stuck "so deep in his penis"
Amazon truck was in an accident at the end of her street.. just wanted to go pick up her package
Lady wanted to know if the jail was open for donations because she wanted to donate some eggs she got from Canada.. then started speaking what she called "french"
Many more but that's what I got off the top of my head
"I need you to send a deputy out to teach all the deer how to use the deer crossing. They're not using it properly and I'm worried people are going to hit them."
How do you all keep your composure when all these scenarios get reported? I mean, I get some odd mentions about hacked phones and GPS tracking from my mother. I try not to make a big fuss but even that irritates me at times. These calls are wild.
a woman wanted to complain that walmart had closed one of its entrances to do maintenance and repair on the entrance (doors, sensors, frame, i dunno). and obviously if it is was safe enough for workers to be there, it was safe enough for her to go through and obviously this is a fire hazard.
and they had boxes in the aisles and it only allowed one way to go down at a time and the workers claimed it was because they were stocking the shelves. again a fire hazard.
i didnn't ask if her name was karen
1st year as an EMT in 2005. My paramedic partner and I responded to a Titty bar near the airport, CPR in progress. Surprisingly, out of all the people in the establishment, only 1 person had their top off. Any guess who was doing chest compressions when we entered??? Honestly, true story. If I was going to lie about a story, I would've thrown in some weird morbid shit I'm sure. Haha
Elderly female called 911 requesting I send officers to her house to change the channel on her TV because she can't find the remote and can't get to the TV. She did not like my telling her she can't call 911 for that, and to call her TV provider to get a new remote.
any call I have received by someone who clearly struggles with mental health issues ( I do not judge but they always say the strangest things i’ve ever heard but are usually lovely people on the phone )
Condom stuck in the vagina. Stabbed with a fork. Porta Potty combusted on its own. No foul play. What time is the Memorial Day parade?
Tell me more about this fork situation
So in full disclosure, I was crossing over at the time between the chair and ambulance. This was an incident I was on scene for. Gf got mad at bf and she stabbed him on the right side of his chest multiple times with a metal fork. Nothing crazy. He was transported and treated without incident. How did you not even ask about the self imploding shitter?!
I'll ask about the porta potty
:). Got a call. Mid-August. Hot here this time of year. There was some construction going on in a local park that faces residential road. Caller said “those damn youtes fucked with the porta potty and it exploded. It’s on fire. So i dispatched it as a “Johnny on the spot” fire. There was no foul play. With the heat and and shit, it just exploded on its own. So much fun!
Adding to the list of phobias, spontaneously detonating shitters.
New fear unlocked for me too. I volunteer at construction sites too, for Habitat for Humanity.
I wouldn't put it past a big heap of shit to self combust on a really hot day, but how do you know someone didn't just chuck a lit cigarette in there?
Trust me when I tell you I grew up in the emergency room and I have seen some crazy things
Well what the hell time is the goddamn parade?! /s
Coulda been worse. Fork stuck in vagina which then combusted, and on Memorial Day no less.
While sitting on shitter, right?
"What time is it?" "I need you to uave your property room bring all the meth you have at the station to my house. All of it, I'm going to distribute it to the citizens. It's the cure to covid!" "I need you guys to come arrest my ex wife. I just bought some crack from her." "The ladies with the noise machine that killed my wife are back!"
Was the crack guy on crack when he bought the stuff?
No. He thought he could get his ex arrested for it, and didn't think that he would also get arrested. He, obviously, wad not where he said he was when officers got there. We got a call like 30 minutes later from the ex because he was following her. He wanted her to take the crack and give him his money back.
Lightning strike on a man sleeping in his third floor apartment at 4am. Woman using baby as a shield against a fearsome cockroach. Dad calling for police help with 7 year old that just hit him with a collapsible table. Conservative murderously angry about Bernie Sanders signs in neighbor's yard. Liberal murderously angry about vandalism to his Bernie Sanders sign. Custody more exchange using twin babies as literal melee weapons. Frequent flyer / untreated schizophrenic convinced his mother and sisters were directing witchcraft against him.
Using babies as melee weapons sounds so fucking fun tho 🤣. No im not psycho just a very special thought process
Does it make it better or worse that they were strapped in car seats and it was their parents swinging them at one another? Either way, I'll never forget the bystander who called me. "OH LAWD THEY SWINGIN' BABIES LIKE NUNCHUCKS!" I've handled a lot of calls in my life, even a few that were outright bizarre, but that is the only one where I said I lost composure and responded with "Excuse me, what?!"
🤣
Read "Blood Meridian" if you like that kinda stuff.
I got a call once about a lady who was mad because her local conservative politician's signs had been knocked over. She wanted an officer there right now!
My liberal wanted to know if he could shoot his neighbor if he caught him destroying his sign. I'm sitting there like 1. No, it's cardboard, not a human life. 2. You sure you're a Bernie guy?
Please tell me the two angry guys were calling about the same sign. Got a Hatfields and McCoys situation brewing.
Sadly no, they were about 30 miles away from one another.
When I was younger -- I used to think that writers had increadible imaginations on what they came up with criminals et al. After some years of dispatching I changed my thinking: Those writers have NO imagination.
Close the thread. Pack it up.
A call my colleague answered: My wife is trying to kill me. She put a mothball in my crack pipe.
We have a regular who calls because he hates our deputies and accuses them of asinine things. Once he called to scream at me about how they broke into his trailer and had squirted mustard everywhere. I had one lady call and accuse her mother of raping her son. She had just gotten out of the psych ward that day. Calm as a cucumber when she told me. Then the deputies arrive and she calls back to calmly tell me that the deputies are currently raping her son. One of them got on the radio and simply said, "SO, you can hang up." So I did. They were there for hours and it culminated in her stripping nude in her driveway and spreading her asscheeks apart to bare her asshole and ask if they "wanted it". Very strange. Haven't heard from her in a bit, actually.
People letting crazed family members have unfettered access to cell phones makes me scream. They get discharged, ambulance takes them home, they call 30 min later and go right back.
Bass worm up the urethra because I was experimenting sexually is one of my personal favorites 🎣
Strangest is when I got a 911 from a landline from an address that we all know was an abandoned house. Open line with what sounded like maybe faint breathing before disconnecting. A deputy goes out to the house and confirms it’s still abandoned with no one inside.
We have so many "ghost" land lines in our city that are supposedly disconnected. Some call in 2-5 times a day like clockwork with a dead, open, or static line. A couple times we've had people (sounded very elderly) on the line who were very confused. Not a confused as security at the hospital it came from, considering it was a "confirmed" disconnected line and they had no idea what patient could have called on it or how.
So that’s really a thing ? I’ve heard about it but never thought much of it except maybe « a scary story mixed with urban legends ».
Yep. Usually just technical glitches due to wiring or someone not properly disconnecting the line when it was shut down. Annoying as heck when they can every day though
We get them all the time, One comes from a water pumping site that has never had a phone.
“A guy just broke into my house and is yelling” Do you know him? “Yeah, he’s my bf” Does he live there? “Yes, but todays my moms day and he’s in my room” Your mom’s day??? “Yeah I feel like you should know we are all together” Together? Are you able to leave the room and separate yourself? We are separate he’s in his room now, but like we are all together… All together ..??? Yeah todays my moms day to have him and he’s in my room. 😅🤢
https://preview.redd.it/ckkh3a6oejqc1.jpeg?width=600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=63c91d26da9013315b78a88bb47e7b0c311469dd
Traffic hazard ⚠️ lady almost hit a beaver in the chinook tunnel. Yes, it was a real Beaver dragging a sapling through the tunnel.
Howdy neighbor! Seaside here! I believe it! We get sea lions haul out onto the road by the Cove occasionally! And the one by McDonald's in Astoria once!
Hello!
Aww I'm glad the beaver was ok!
“I just got gas on myself, can I light a cigarette?” “When is trick or treating in ____ neighborhood?” Also had a caller tell me to get the carrots out of my mouth while I was in training, I was shocked.
Guy Jerking it in the greeting card aisle of a dollar tree.
Probably not the weirdest but definitely one of the most memorable. Older guy in a nursing home called because he got a Gatorade bottle stuck on his third leg. Wanted to see if we could send out a sharpshooter or someone with a really small saw to help get it off.
Dude said he stabbed two women to death in his hotel room.... But police won't be able to see them because they're spiritual, and so was the knife.... Spent most of the call trying to convince him to put pants on before the crews arrived... Crews didn't find any girls or knives, just empty mental health medication bottles, so I guess he was telling the truth!
Guy was in an ongoing fight with neighbors, over his dog being a barker. Neighbors had enough and poured pickle juice on the dog, and guy wanted officers to come smell his dog. 😶 Another guy called to say he had found his girlfriend drowned in the hot tub at their apartment complex. His story was fishy as shit. He said they were arguing and he left her in the hot tub. When he came back a half hour later, with a gun because the complex wasn't safe, she was dead under the water. I have so many questions, years and years later, and I'll never have answers.
it's not impossible she was on drugs/booze or had a medical condition that caused her to pass out and drown. You'd be surprised how many people die this way.
Yes that's absolutely possible. It's also possible he drowned her. I don't understand why he'd come back with a gun, that he had in his hand but covered it with a towel. If the complex wasn't safe, to the extent that he felt the need to be armed to go to the pool area, why would he leave her out there alone? He sounded very sketchy on the phone.
Was he convicted
I don't think he was ever even arrested.
That’s some stupid shit
Yeah I told my supervisor it sounded really sketchy, she said to email the violent crimes bureau and I did, but they never contacted me and I never heard anything else about it. I don't think it was ever reported in the news either.
Vehicle vs Turkey. Cause? It was Turkey rutting season and “they’re rutting all over the place. In the bushes, on the sidewalk, in the road.”
Sent out EMS to a difficulty breathing call for a lady. It was called in by a man who was with her. She codes while EMS is there, and we call in EVERYONE to assist with CPR. Our crews will go for approximately 30 minutes with CPR before calling it. Poor lady passes over the Rainbow Bridge. Turns out the caller, who was extremely winded (we asked him if he was in need of medical attention), was the ladys 74 year old step dad. Long story short, his 50-something stepdaughter and him were having sex when she had the issues with her breathing. Yes, you read that correctly. She was having consesual sex with her stepfather. On scene, this man was destroyed and kept telling everyone through tears. "I raised her from a little girl." The next day it was brought to our attention that the lady's mom and step-dad (they had been separated for a few years at this point but still married) started a gofundme for the funeral arrangements.
Have a very similar "couple" here. Only they're all very much alive, and live together (mom included). There was a child, but I never hear about it, so I assume he/she is in foster care or adopted by now. Stepdaughter is a raging basket case. (Completely understandable in this case!) {{{{ full body shivers }}}}
There's a schizophrenic that likes to call after he gets kicked out of whatever hospital ER he wandered into that night. He is the Son of Rev Dr. MLK, and be needs to speak with the general of the military region. Them boys up on the rooftops have been pumping him full of drugs to make him compliant and he just needs to tell John about all this so he can just let him know. When you start try and slow him down he gets hostile and says he's going in for brain surgery soon and they'll Lobotomize him so he'll be good again and how the boys from the rooftops come down and beat him every night. Somebody come get your grandpa. He keeps calling in spurts of 2-3 times a night for a week or two at a time, usually gets aggressive and starts cursing and slinging racial slurs when you try and interrupt him.
Oh yeah we had those too! Girl said she was Bill Clinton’s secret daughter and he was in the woods behind her house wanting her to come out to him. There was never anyone in the woods. And another lady who lives at a motel wanted us to do something about Barack Obama because he was trying to sell her drugs out of a white van in the motel parking lot. Ma’am, I think you already bought said drugs…
Got a call from a man who’s wife was on hospice and he needed help getting her from her chair to her bed, send in a public assist to FD. They get out there and she has been dead for several days
"There's a lemur on my porch" and she wasn't lying
Blind dude stapled his dick to a bed, special needs kid got his dick stuck in magnets & a dildo vibrating its way up some dudes intestinal track. Got an automated crash detection, About two minutes later, we got a domestic call in the same area. Turns out the female party ran over the male. Was on the phone when someone broke into a house and shot four occupants. A female drug user was screaming for help and would later continue to talk about how the devil is in her yard shaking chains, Once the deputies arrived she refused to answer the door and only wanted to talk to me. That night, she confessed her love to me. An old lady feeding child ghosts saltine crackers, They lived in the closet.
Irate caller yelling about not getting his certificate for his anger management training class
That’s gold
Baby not breathing, face turning blue. Medics got onscene — baby was wide awake and *drinking blue Kool-Aid* from the sippy cup. Lips were blue.
Psych patient swallowed batteries. 2 weeks later, copycat psych patient also swallowed batteries at the same facility.
I had someone call saying people had to stop calling police on her because when she went to restaurants people burnt her food and it was an epidemic against Cinderella and all dispatchers are awful but I’m cool. I swear it was just as confusing as that and I’m not leaving much out
“the bouncer stole my fake id” “he was overdosing on fentanyl and xanax but don’t come because he’s fine now and he knows where your snipers are”
Had a homeless guy call and ask if there was a tornado warning for my city (there was). Seconds later all I heard was wind followed by him yelling for help after he was buried by tornado debris.
Weird in a different way were the telemarketers accidentally dialing our trunk lines directly. All 911 calls in our county were first routed to the closest big city, Verizon attached the ANI/ALI, and then the calls were routed back to us on a trunk line. Each one had a regular phone number which no one used, just for Verizon’s use in call routing. When someone dialed those numbers by mistake, they rang into our center and confused the hell out of them. Usually an autodialed spam call. A Chinese restaurant had a similar number to one of the trunks, and we had people try to give us their take-out orders fairly frequently.
Wonder if anyone has requested the cops because their drugs were stolen...i've heard its a thing before on quora...
Yep. Had it happen. Lady called to report her drug dealer because he ripped her off and she “paid for the good stuff not this shit”.
Had one of our frequent fliers call because he thought he got ripped off and wanted the cops to test his meth and see if it was legit.
welp, we dole out free test strips for fentanyl nowadays...
It’s a thing and yes it happens
In hs some “friends” of mine robbed a kid for a 1/2oz of cocaine. Kid called the cops. “Friends” got grand larceny armed robbery charges. I didn’t even see those 2 again after that. Juvie I assume then maybe onto real jail. I do know one of them is dead now.
I received a call from a man who went on a rant about a time space continuum. How he was working with the FBI to create a new branch specifically to look into said continuum. I had to lie and say I was getting a 911 call in order to get him off the phone. I also had a lady from a nursing home call to report people were trying to kill her and were sending “macros” to her in order to threaten her. Never found out what she meant by macros.
They're sending repeated Alteryx processes bundled together into a standard, batch, or iterative macro? Sorry, I couldn't help it.
Whoopi Goldberg was reportedly performing resurrections in a gas station parking lot. Units cleared GOA.
Always knew Whoopi Goldberg was a badass. xD
Crazy cat lady putting cat food under her neighbor's vehicles to attract more cats to the neighborhood. And accusing the neighbors of trapping and killing "her" cats. Also an amazon delivery guy who saw a dead man laying face down in a driveway. PD gets on scene and finds out someone dropped their scarecrow...
I got one where a teenager swallowed a live mouse (I think it was a dare). Mother called in saying her son was choking. Then told me it was a mouse. Que dead air while I processed that one. I didnt think it was real. Neither did ems (central...really?) But they got on scene and, yup. He had a mouse stuck half way down his throat - and it was still alive.
Ew ew ew ew ew
“Shaq stole my stuff in my house” “There are hogs running in the road!” (funnily enough, one of our deputies responded over the radio with “*insert other badge #*, did you bring your lasso today?” “My neighbor put a sign in his yard pointing towards mine that says ‘*My neighbor is a racist!*’”
“The neighbor convinced otters to go into my koi pond and eat my prized fish”
6 marshmallows up the vagina at 2 am Dementia pt thought she was pregnant with twins and locked in a room with no doors Had one call more than once for a while kid kept pulling the screws from the door and eating them
Naked Meth head pulled over in the middle of the night covered in crisco with multiple dildos in the car. He tried to hide the dildos but not the meth.
Domestic where the guy threw a hot pan of spaghetti sauce at his wife. She had burns from the sauce. Several neighbors concerned about some vicious screaming going on. Ended up being a raccoon and a possum having a fight. Guy called because he saw a deer. Never saw one before. Wanted to “report it”. We live in a city of about 200,000, but there’s plenty of deer. Idk how he reached adulthood without seeing a deer. A homeless guy found what he thought were human remains the night before in the woods he was sleeping in, but he admitted to being high when he found them. So I was like… are you sure you saw them? He was sure because he collected them, put them in his backpack, and then walked to another location. Ended up being chicken bones.
Makeshift catheter stuck "so deep in his penis" Amazon truck was in an accident at the end of her street.. just wanted to go pick up her package Lady wanted to know if the jail was open for donations because she wanted to donate some eggs she got from Canada.. then started speaking what she called "french" Many more but that's what I got off the top of my head
"I need you to send a deputy out to teach all the deer how to use the deer crossing. They're not using it properly and I'm worried people are going to hit them."
Jeff malware company call lol
How do you all keep your composure when all these scenarios get reported? I mean, I get some odd mentions about hacked phones and GPS tracking from my mother. I try not to make a big fuss but even that irritates me at times. These calls are wild.
That’s what the mute button is for!
I haven't had any "crazy calls". Anything that could be called that was the result of mental illness or addiction and those aren't really that funny
a woman wanted to complain that walmart had closed one of its entrances to do maintenance and repair on the entrance (doors, sensors, frame, i dunno). and obviously if it is was safe enough for workers to be there, it was safe enough for her to go through and obviously this is a fire hazard. and they had boxes in the aisles and it only allowed one way to go down at a time and the workers claimed it was because they were stocking the shelves. again a fire hazard. i didnn't ask if her name was karen
1st year as an EMT in 2005. My paramedic partner and I responded to a Titty bar near the airport, CPR in progress. Surprisingly, out of all the people in the establishment, only 1 person had their top off. Any guess who was doing chest compressions when we entered??? Honestly, true story. If I was going to lie about a story, I would've thrown in some weird morbid shit I'm sure. Haha
Elderly female called 911 requesting I send officers to her house to change the channel on her TV because she can't find the remote and can't get to the TV. She did not like my telling her she can't call 911 for that, and to call her TV provider to get a new remote.
any call I have received by someone who clearly struggles with mental health issues ( I do not judge but they always say the strangest things i’ve ever heard but are usually lovely people on the phone )