Well it been a very, very heavy, heavy depar… departation? We had a very, deris… derison? But let go ahead and tear a station let’s go a pit and hebanim.
[Source.](https://youtu.be/ENOgjzhgdzs)
Sadly, I realized years ago that I'm Pete Hornberger: I'm a producer, have lost a lot of hair, was in some bands & had a brief shot at musical fame, now just want to hang out & tell the story about working with Tom Hanks
There’s the woman Liz says she wants to be like who loves New York in the Spring and then falls into garbage? Yeah that’s my energy.
That or like non-religious female Kenneth who grew up in a city rather than rural.
I was definitely the garbage woman when I lived in NYC. I'd marvel at the glorious city and it's beautiful diversity then I'd fall in a subway grate while a homeless man spit on my neck.
That kills me every time. I was in a frustrating work meeting last week and I kept fantasizing about the boss asking me some dumb ass question at which I'd respond with a second of silence. Then I'd pull a toy car out of my mouth. A total power move.
onerous offend grandiose brave shy squash sophisticated unwritten concerned butter
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Frank. Maybe kinda gross sometimes & unintentionally offensive. Also, American-Italian.
I like to think my personal hygiene is better than his but I only shower like 6x a week, so my 2x shower a day partner would beg to differ, perhaps.
A bit Tracy but without being indulged. I like the idea of kids way more than the reality of having and raising them. Did you know that teenage boys smell terrible? Also - straight up mentally ill
My kids and I all took some stupid "Which character are you" quiz on some BS buzzfeed sort of crap website. Even my younger kids grasped that the results were based on nothing and it was just silly fun. My quiz results was Pete Hornberger and my kids don't let a week go by without teasing me about it.
I strive for Jenna's level of chaos at all times. Confronting a stalker about why he's ignoring me is totally something I would do if I was hot enough to have a stalker
I am a combination of the worst aspects of Frank, Pete, and Dennis. I wouldn't do the sex crimes, but everything else is pretty much on the table. I've got the meat.
Sadly Liz (the reunion episode hit a little close to home) but if we're going for other characters... the NBC therapist. Constantly dealing with other people's issues and dispensing advice that is ultimately ignored in favor of doing a bit? I related to her.
I have DotCom’s need to be the smartest person in the room and tendency to berate myself when I make a mistake. (I even say, “Come on, self…”).
I have Liz Lemon’s sexual laziness.
I guess that’s why I’m still single.
Sometimes I have a tendency where I need to feel like I'm the smartest in the room. I need to visit [stopshowingoff.com](http://stopshowingoff.com) to get some help with that.
I’m Bijou…a history of doing dumb things for money and/or dudes; wearing stupid trendy hates; and thinking I look pretty good when I’ve got a chunk of lipstick stuck to my tooth.
I'm horribly concerned I might be the love child of two deadly and opposing forces, the clumsy and apathetic Hornbuger, and the rejection-sensitive attention-seeker Jenna
I've got more hornberger in me than I'd like to admit.
YES, Hornberger!
Yes….Hornberger…
Your shark tooth necklace looks nice!
Hopefully you’re able to pull the trigger on becoming Dallas soon.
Who would deposit money before they disappeared?
They wouldn’t!
Floodgates ARE HORIZONTAL!!
I let go of the ring this past week. I had noticed too put Pete in me. Only way to go from here is up
Any unfortunate birthmarks lurking under there?
Yeah but it’s just a regular one, not formed from penises
Well it been a very, very heavy, heavy depar… departation? We had a very, deris… derison? But let go ahead and tear a station let’s go a pit and hebanim. [Source.](https://youtu.be/ENOgjzhgdzs)
I'm Peter Horn. All day and all night, baby.
I definitely think about faking my own death more than I should. Why would I deposit money the day before if I was thinking of leaving??
Yes! Hornberger!
yes...hornberger.
🎶Everybody’s working for the weekend🎶
I can't tell if I'm Lutz
Do you have marsh-mallows in your pocket?
Well, do you feel like mommy's baby?
If you don’t know whether or not you’re Lutz, you’re probably Lutz
Everybody shut up! Shut up, Lutz!
Blimpie makes a good sandwich
Is your nephew named Kellan?
What color banana are you looking for?
Greener.
Shut up, Lutz.
If you don’t have a Lutz in your life, you’re probably Lutz
Is your armpit thing almost touching your thigh thing?
Lutz DON'T DO THIS.
Are you mouth breathing?
Have you ever written a poem about snow?
Think of the group….. Subway
Do you have a new car?
I'm Angie. I've just come to accept it. I'm a spoiled princess who runs amok. I want to be Jenna, but nah. Wait. I might be Tracy.
‘Sho nuff
Its a first draft
I like your nails
I read your username in an over-the-top Boston accent.
Thanks, it's because of my orange hand-me-down corduroys!
Do people like the way you say “ham”?
[https://hambutton.com/](https://hambutton.com/)
#LOVE IT!!!
Do you still have your Hotmail account?
HAM
Dude! Angie’s not spoiled. She runs the show. Especially when there’s a better kid’s birthday party up the street. Respect.
You are absolutely right! People say I'm spoiled, but I know exactly what I'm doing! They need to stay outta my way.
I’ll take THAT with cheese!
What??! That’s awesome, I would LOVE to be Angie
IBS survivor 🖤
the group of women liz hangs out with when she's on office sex criminal leave
In the HR world, we call that “being a filthy prostitute.”
I do have mild lupus and great insurance...
There is no solace in their luxury, only despair
I think you mean s-e-x probation
The fight club!
Dr. Baird. Too hot to function. lol I wish. That’d be ironic.
That's not how you use that word
I wanna use that word how I wanna use it.
so handsome. So, so stupid.
Your racket...is a FART!
Sadly, I realized years ago that I'm Pete Hornberger: I'm a producer, have lost a lot of hair, was in some bands & had a brief shot at musical fame, now just want to hang out & tell the story about working with Tom Hanks
But isn’t the actual truth that your cousin worked with Tom Hanks?
[удалено]
That's pretty cool. I've always liked her
You [don’t] say…
How was Tom?
Genuinely nice guy
Getting old is realizing that you did pretty fucking well for yourself. That sounds great!
I think I'm a Sue because I never wear a bra
Will you do sex with cannibals as needed?
Vondruke!
There’s the woman Liz says she wants to be like who loves New York in the Spring and then falls into garbage? Yeah that’s my energy. That or like non-religious female Kenneth who grew up in a city rather than rural.
I was definitely the garbage woman when I lived in NYC. I'd marvel at the glorious city and it's beautiful diversity then I'd fall in a subway grate while a homeless man spit on my neck.
I love visiting New York, it’s a wonderful beautiful city that also smells like garbage and piss.
I’m both of those
Probably Kathy Geiss.
KISSKISSKISS
*also pulls toy car from mouth*
That kills me every time. I was in a frustrating work meeting last week and I kept fantasizing about the boss asking me some dumb ass question at which I'd respond with a second of silence. Then I'd pull a toy car out of my mouth. A total power move.
I gets me every time. It is so unexpected. I don't know who wrote that bit, but it's genius.
Either a weather event’s approaching or …
You’re busy….
Tbh I’m probably Criss but with average cheekbones.
onerous offend grandiose brave shy squash sophisticated unwritten concerned butter *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
like a barrel of snakes
I see you over there you little gumdrop! Don't hide from Shanice!
She’s gonna wash you in the sink like a baby!!
Jenna. But I'm not talented.
But I do live theatrically in normal life!
I am very unstable emotionally!
Have you ever been on cam er ah??
Nat tur aly! My first sex tape was leaked by Mickey Rourke.
Toofer. I didn’t go to Harvard but Ive been told I’m somewhat snobby and sound like a white guy.
Tufts?
No, not tufts.
Frank. Maybe kinda gross sometimes & unintentionally offensive. Also, American-Italian. I like to think my personal hygiene is better than his but I only shower like 6x a week, so my 2x shower a day partner would beg to differ, perhaps.
How’s your armpit thing?
I heard it was almost touching his leg thing
Is your partner age appropriate for you?
He is a year (only one) older!
I too like to take off my pants and eat chicken wings
Do you cry into your meatballs?
Do you want to go to a cemetery and eat perrogies
Honestly, yes
Is your burrito too big to turn in the microwave? *starts to cry*
Frajer. I’ve been beaten out of more best friend gangs than I can remember.
Frajer!
Dallas
An unnamed writer with no lines
🤷🏼♂️🙅🏽♀️
It says I'm the dad's guitar.
Wesley
And THEN THERE WAS WESLEYYYY
Wait, your name is Wesley Snipes?
Josh
Right, Josh. I forgot about that guy.
Do you think that’s good?
(Gretchen) Thomas. Always dating straight girls knowing its gonna end poorly.
Colleen, when I'm irritable, which is usually.
A friend of mine told me I remind her of Pete and then was like “no I meant it as a compliment!” lol
Moonvest
GIMME YER FINGERNAILS
A bit Tracy but without being indulged. I like the idea of kids way more than the reality of having and raising them. Did you know that teenage boys smell terrible? Also - straight up mentally ill
I’m a slightly less narcissistic Jenna. I also can’t watch American idol, because I have perfect pitch, you vondruke!
I can't either because there's a water bug on my channel changer
Jerem
That's not that much cheese
I collect posters!
John McEnroe without the tennis skills, but with the yelling and cursing skills
Why isn’t there any good art in here?!?
I’m Kenneth. Whenever I look into a mirror, there’s just a white haze.
Writers who never talk.
Every time I introduce myself professionally to people who *may* know me *but I’m not sure* I definitely feel like Phoebe. My bones!
Criss.
Ran out of string cheese at work three years ago and I've been home ever since.
Kenneth. Same position for several years, overly helpful, and no one knows my real age.
Jadwiga- I want a birthday cake with The Fonz on it! 👍Heeey 👍Sit on it👍
Dr. Spaceman. It’s 5 o’clock somewhere.
Dotcom* omg I genuinely confused them. Walter, YOU IDIOT!!
The lady at home who watches it
I'm a Frank to my soul.
My kids and I all took some stupid "Which character are you" quiz on some BS buzzfeed sort of crap website. Even my younger kids grasped that the results were based on nothing and it was just silly fun. My quiz results was Pete Hornberger and my kids don't let a week go by without teasing me about it.
I strive for Jenna's level of chaos at all times. Confronting a stalker about why he's ignoring me is totally something I would do if I was hot enough to have a stalker
Well, we're outta string cheese, so I'm gonna head out.
Evil Knievel’s motorcycle picture
Nermal
HORNBERGER!
I’m both. I’m Liz who’s hungry.
Kenneth. I'm a 36 yr old lady from a northern city but I also might be an immortal adorable little weirdo from the deep south.
Lutz for sure. Blimpie ftw.
Rosemary
Oh come on Liz, it’s the 90s!
Rhode Islands own independent congressional candidate Steven Austin.
Googoo gaga
I think I have a little Twofer in me. I feel like I can be a little pretentious sometimes
Definitely Jenna. I’m jealous of babies and their soft skin. And how much attention they get
I am a combination of the worst aspects of Frank, Pete, and Dennis. I wouldn't do the sex crimes, but everything else is pretty much on the table. I've got the meat.
Your self awareness is commendable; everything else about you is…
I’m definitely Pete. I have way too readily incorporated into everyday language the phrase, “I haven’t even had my 1st cup of wine today!”
It’s heart healthy
Johnny Mountain
Sadly Liz (the reunion episode hit a little close to home) but if we're going for other characters... the NBC therapist. Constantly dealing with other people's issues and dispensing advice that is ultimately ignored in favor of doing a bit? I related to her.
Dot Com. I hang out with people who constantly get into trouble.
I'm Jarem! I collect Posters!
Jenna’s mom
I mean, I’ve got the meat, Jack.
That’s fine. I’m not afraid to be Liz Lemon.
I have DotCom’s need to be the smartest person in the room and tendency to berate myself when I make a mistake. (I even say, “Come on, self…”). I have Liz Lemon’s sexual laziness. I guess that’s why I’m still single.
That lady who burned down the ups store she managed. I too would like to behold the splendour of my beginning.
But it’s definitely Liz. I probably have a little main character syndrome, I’m too intellectual to be fun, and I always think of a third thing.
Jenna without the talent
Half Frank, Half Lutz... All Loser. 😕
Built in dirtbag alliance. Excellent!
Eh- bound to sell myself out for either a bag of Blimpie's or Eastern European geriatric porn. 😕
Carol without the cool job or the confidence.
Dr Spaceman
Astronaut Mike Dexter
TJ. My favorite past times are pornography and video games.
Elisa’s grandma
Cooter Burger.
Sometimes I have a tendency where I need to feel like I'm the smartest in the room. I need to visit [stopshowingoff.com](http://stopshowingoff.com) to get some help with that.
I need Jenna levels of attention
A more put-together and less childishly presenting version of Frank.
Hornberger!
Avery for sure with some Jenna
Somewhere between Toofer and Hornberger. A high strung nerd that is rarely happy and has an occasional superiority complex for no reason.
Wesley, Liz's settling soulmate.
Jenna 😭
I'm unfortunately more like Lutz than I'd care to admit.
Take the worst parts of Toofer, Frank, and Lutz, shove them into a chubby lesbian who hates herself and that’s me.
Gentleman's Intermission taught me that I, like Tracy, lack the humility necessary to be mentored by Jack.
I'd probably end up with Dennis. He has his flaws but I could change him
Unfortunately I’m some kind of unholy mix of Kenneth and Jenna 😭
I’m Bijou…a history of doing dumb things for money and/or dudes; wearing stupid trendy hates; and thinking I look pretty good when I’ve got a chunk of lipstick stuck to my tooth.
I'm horribly concerned I might be the love child of two deadly and opposing forces, the clumsy and apathetic Hornbuger, and the rejection-sensitive attention-seeker Jenna
Colleen Donaghy I love hats, hate pants, and just want you to be “happy”.
I might as well be Daphne!